Users in a World of Fiction
by TREBOR117
Summary: The Biotic without his past fought his inner demon and won. The User repaired the code and helped take down a Spectre. But when they meet, it's a new challenge, a new galaxy, and a whole new Shepard. Crossover/Sequel between Trebor117's "Stuck In a World of Fiction" And Starspike7's "Users" .
1. It is the Prologue Beeyotches!

**S7-Alright, this is a disclaimer for all coming to read this that this is a fic that is all about fun. It is going to be crazy, uncontrollable awesomeness of buddy cop proportions. That being said. Those of you that are adimately against Users or SiaWoF should stop reading right now. Also, those of you that are looking for a direct sequel to both of our previous fics have come to the wrong place. This is a prelude into the sequels. Think of this a book 1.5. Got anything to add Trebor?**

**T117- Only a little bit extra for the people from me- You should definitely read his story before you start this one, or you will be hopelessly- hilariously- confused; Bourne'll be important here, but he isn't the exclusive main guy. Other than that Spike, I got nothing that can't wait until after the people have actually read the thing. Speaking of which:**

**Starspike7 and Trebor117 proudly present:**

**Users in a World of Fiction**

**Bourne:**

Raptor swore for what must have been the millionth time since landing, bullets flying past on all sides.

I hid my irritation only slightly better. "Remind me to ask for a pay raise when we talk to Anderson after this." I said, flicking a knife into hand, and using it as a mirror to see past the corner of the crate we were hiding behind.

It'd been about two-and-a-half weeks since we'd taken Sovereign down. Unsurprisingly, despite all the awards we'd had heaped upon us,The Council was more ready to believe in Santa Claus than the Reapers. So instead of having us do anything worthwhile to prepare for the coming invasion, we were out here wiping out the last remnants of the Geth forces.

I wasn't surprised that they'd ignored us, but I'd been half hoping that with me backing up Shepard up, they'd have been at least a _bit_ less skeptical.

I'd also been hoping that last remnants would have meant that this abandoned warehouse would only have a few Geth, maybe 50 at the most, something we figured two Spectres would be able to handle. We were currently pinned down by at least thrice that number.

Raptor had run out of Thermal Clips pretty much as soon as we went in. Luckily, I'd held onto my older weapons, and so she was currently using my Assault Rifle to inflict as much damage as she could, while I held them off on my side with my biotics and shotgun.

"I don't suppose you have a plan?" Shepard asked as she ducked back, shields barely holding.

"You're asking me about a plan?"

"Who else am I going to ask, the Geth?"

I saw an opportunity and threw a singularity at a group of the synthetics. I followed it with a warp field a moment later, causing a biotic explosion.

I glanced back at the hallway we'd entered through. "It's about a hundred meters back to the door. Our options are to call in for backup, or make a break for it."

"If we call in back up, the Geth are going to just mow them down." She said, shaking her head. "And our radios are jammed anyway."

"Well, that's just perfect."

"At least it means its easier to decide which to go with." She said, forcing a smile.

I glanced around the corner, and pulled my head back as a rocket flew past the crate. It landed close enough to drop my shields to half strength. "No kidding. We stay here, we're slaughtered." I slid my shotgun onto my hip. "I say we get the hell out of here and just bomb the place from orbit."

"Great, except for the part where they shoot us in the back. Even as fast as we can run-"

"Who said anything about running?"

After a moment of confusion, she groaned. "Do not tell me you want to carry me and do that charging thing?"

Another rocket hit nearby, this time closer to her.

She tossed me back my gun and moved close enough for me to pick her up bridal style. "I swear, this is just embarrassing."

"Then I suggest you hold on so I don't leave you here with your embarrassment." I deadpanned, biotics surrounding us both.

A moment later, I was standing in front of the door, and I hurriedly hit the button to open it, putting up a barrier around us, though the Geth were pouring on everything they had onto it.

The door finally slid open, and I stepped through, still holding Raptor. I heard it closing, and sighed in relief, glad to be out alive.

A moment later, something hit me square in the back, and I was sent flying forwards, dropping Raptor mid flight, and landing hard enough to knock the wind out of myself.

"Alright, that's it. We're both asking for a raise after this." I heard Raptor say, but her voice seemed faint, and my vision seemed to be fading as well.

"I think...I might also need...some new...armor." I managed to get out amidst my coughing. I saw something flying from my mouth as I coughed, staining the ground red.

I dimly heard Raptor swearing as her footsteps moved my way, but couldn't hear anything after that.

Then, my world went completely black.

**Ty:**

Loud music blared around what was left of the Fluxx. A huge piece of Sovereign had lodged itself through the roof and punctured through to the next level. Danny was sitting behind the bar pulling every alcoholic drink he could out and setting it on the table.

when the amount of drinks on the table got around twenty-one, he stopped,."Well, that's it. Looks like the party will have to try and continue with only twenty-one bottles of whiskey."

I grabbed one of the bottles off the counter and cracked it open. "Make that twenty."

"So, you really are just going to drink it." Danny probed as he sat up from behind the counter.

I took a swig and then handed it to him. "I'll share. It's a long climb back."

"It would be easier if you got some armor that would enhance your strength like mine instead of the rags you are wearing." Danny pointed out and took a swig.

I looked down at my armor, it was mostly if not all was melted. It was missing the right gauntlet and had a gaping hole in my chest. The shoulder guards were completely ripped away leaving nothing but the under skin to protect my arms. It was a piece of shit but it did take a direct shot from Saren/Sovereign and survived so it might be lucky.

I shrugged Danny's comment off. "Hey, I don't see you throwing away your piece of shit."

"Mine is just charred, not just holding together by the duct tape I use to repair it."

I snatched the bottle away from him and took another drink. "Can we go now?"

He nodded and then pointed at a wall. "We can glitch jump from there."

"I can't do that, remember?"

Danny put his hand out to motion for a handshake. "Then, I will just copy and paste it into you."

I gave him an inquisitive look. "You sure about this?"

My best friend just smiled and stretched his hand out further, "Nope."

Throwing all caution and worry to the wind, I took Danny's hand. Immediately, the red matrix code in me lit up and I saw a bunch of red ones and zeros crawl to my hand. I looked at his arm and saw that it was fully green and was trying to hold off the red matrix code.

Once the code reached a stable position, a blue zero flowed down his arm and stop just on his wrist. The zero then stretched horizontally until a line formed across the zero diagonally. The stretch finally stopped when it split into two. The zero that was closest to my arm moved over to me and Danny let go ending the clash.

I looked over to the wall, there was a blue rip shaped line made of ones and zeroes. "It worked."

I looked back at Danny and he had his hands on his knees. "Yeah, cool, sweet."

I scoffed at Danny's exhaustion, "Tired?"

"No", Danny stood up and cracked his back. "Just took a lot out of me."

I took a long drink of the whiskey and then offered Danny the bottle again. "Well, you know what they say. When you are feeling sick... I forget now drink some whiskey."

Danny took the whiskey and screwed the cap back on. "Nah, we need to get going to the bar."

Shaking his head he grabbed the bottles and put them in the holding parts of his belt. With a turn on his heels, gave me the come on motion and I followed him to the glitch. He pressed his hand to the wall on the glitch and closed his eyes. Focusing, he made the glitch open up and pull him in.

Making my way up to the glitch, I placed my hand on it and thought very carefully. It opened up and I was pulled in. The glitch became a tube, carrying me faster than I could ever hope to travel. It was blue and the code that lined it changed from blue, to red, to yellow. It had to be the fruitiest way to travel in the entire history of the world.

Then, the tube sat on the color red and began to weave and bob. Something about it told me that it wasn't going to end , the zeroes and ones changed to say error.

I was then tossed and thrown as the tunnel began to stray off of my intended path. It continued to move until I was falling straight down. The tunnel finally ended with me face planting into grass.

**T117: Well, this should be an...interesting meeting.**

**S7: I just realized something.**

**T117: That you left the oven on at home?**

**S7: Oh shit, I did. But that wasn't it. I just realized that you copied Masterchief.**

**T117:...You're saying you just now realized that the numbers are a Halo reference?**

**S7: Well, it didn't really hit me until I saw it next to the S in my name. Anyway, so that is the Prologue. We have a crap ton of chapters following this.**

**T117: Expect a new one every Monday and Friday. (And he does mean a crapton, we're at like chapter 60 something at the moment. I ****love** **having a backlog!)**

**S7: You know, this started out as like a twenty chapter thing when we first planned it.**

**T117: Did it really?**

**S7: Yeah, it was just going to be Ty and Bourne rushing through it all and then fighting at the end.**

**T117: Right, because you didn't want to admit that Bourne would kick Ty's ass in a fight...or it was the other way around and I didn't want to admit the opposite…meh, it's not really important now.**

**S7: Twenty bucks says everyone would say Bourne would win in the reviews.**

**T117: Depends on if they actually read Ty's story too...Yeah, I'm not taking that bet. I'd lose that money like I threw it in a fire.**

**S7: Well, I guess we will see by next chapter. Also, before I forget to tell the readers. Any questions you have about the making of, the process, or the actual logistics of the story will be answered in order of importance on every fifth chapter.**

**T117: And if you don't want to leave a review for whatever reason, that's what PMs are for. Though I'll probably give them slightly lower priority than the reviews. And Anon reviews are below that.**

**S7: Sounds good. Next chapter will be out on the third or the second if the Seahawks win as well as another on the third. Now I tried having that whole sign off thing like some people but it just doesn't work for me so I am going to go get another coffee and play in traffic.**

**T117: Sayonara.**


	2. Make Way for the Demolition Duo

**Bourne:**

Slowly, groggily, I opened my eyes.

The first thing I noticed was that I was still in my armor, and my face was planted on the ground- while that was the last thing I could remember before losing consciousness, there was a noticeable lack of my own blood, and the ground below me wasn't rock or metal.

I raised my head slowly, taking in the scene. Wherever I was, it clearly wasn't the Geth base Raptor and I had been in. It was outdoors, a red hue painted the sky and the ground was covered in green-brown grass- even if I'd just been drug outdoors, that sky had been greenish blue, and it had been all barren desert for miles.

I slowly got to my feet, expecting to feel a lot of pain. To my surprise, if I had been hurt, I seemed completely healed.I felt the back of my armor, where I'd taken the hit, but there was no sign that it had even been scratched there- let alone hit by a rocket.

I heard a groan around me, and spun around, my Assassin flying into my hands. I was surprised to find myself pointing the pistol at a young man getting up from the ground. His armor was in tatters, a giant hole in front of his chestpiece, and his right gauntlet completely gone. Combined with his short cropped dirty blond hair, I was fairly certain he was a soldier- one who'd been through one hell of a fight. Still, I wondered why he had a big red digital zero glowing on his chest.

I lowered my gun, though I didn't store it yet. I had no idea what had happened, so I wasn't going to take any chances.

His cloudy blue eyes met mine, and I saw them widen slightly as they did so- I was used to that, considering that my eyes literally glowed.

"What happened to you?"

I raised an eyebrow, gesturing to his torn up armor. "Funny. I was about to ask you the same thing."

"I'm not the one looking like scarface."

I resisted the urge to touch the scars that streaked across my face from Saren's/Iron's claws. "These are scars. The damage to your armor is fresh... and I don't like repeating myself." I added.

The man touched the edge of the hole in his chestplate. "This is just here because I forgot to change my armor before the party. Luckily, Shepard promised he would hook me up with a set of Travelers armor. Where is the bastard now that I think about it?"

Even with my talent for it, it took effort to keep my face expressionless. _Okay_..._Last I checked, Raptor was not a 'he'. And I would remember meeting this guy- even without perfect memory. _"Maybe you hit your head when you landed." I suggested mildly, palming a knife in my left hand.

The man stood up and pointed to me. "What are you talking about? Do you even know who I am?"

"No. However, I do know Commander Shepard, and I don't recall her ever mentioning anything about getting you new armor. Or anything else you just said."

"Um, last I checked I didn't select Femshep, I selected Male Shepard. That means _he _is a dude. Second, How the hell do you know the Commander? I don't remember saving anyone from killer lawn mowers."

I looked at him with sheer awe. "Uh, hello? I'm her XO, fellow Spectre, helped save the Citadel? Any of this ringing a bell?" Something else hit me a moment later. _Did he just use the term "Femshep?"_

"Listen, I am pretty sure I was the one who saved the Citadel. Unless, you remember getting absorbed by Saren, calling forth a hard boot and then using it to restore all viable setting but losing the ability to get rid of the corrupted code in your system."

"...What kinda drugs are you on?"

I cut across his vehement denial.

"Since you seem so fixated on the scars, perhaps I should mention that it was-" I stopped myself just short of blurting out a few of my best kept secrets. "It was Saren's claws that inflicted them. Then I cut his hand off, shoved a singularity into his chest, and shot him in the head. Multiple times."

Putting up his hands he waved me off, "God, you had me going. I thought you could be some sort of alternate program but that is just stupid. Tough guy doing what tough guys do best act doesn't exactly work best with me. After all, everyone knows that Shepard killed Saren and FYI only Shepard can kill Saren. It's written in the code. None of the companions, you or even me can kill Saren. The game just won't allow us."

My eyes had begun to glow as he talked, and now they were like miniature suns as I only just resisted the urge to charge him point blank and knock him into next week. "Okay, what in the fuck are you talking about? Code? Program? This isn't the Matrix Mr. Neo. Also, that 'tough guy act' is a lot more than an act." I triggered the knife in my hand to prove my point.

He put out five fingers, and gestured to each as he spoke, "One, it's Mister Anderson, not Mister Neo. Two, We're all made of code. Three, Your act that's not an act is getting on my nerves. Four, I don't care how delusional you are, Shepard is a guy. Five, I am hungry, do you know where I can get something to eat around here?"

I kept my face expressionless, just looking at him. So it came as a complete shock to him when my fist hit him right in the mouth. It wasn't as hard as I could manage- or anywhere near what Raptor could do- but it was enough to make him take a step back to keep his balance. "How bout a Knuckle Sandwich?" I asked sardonically, sending my boot knife into my right hand. "Now start talking sense before I decide to actually hurt you." I reversed the knife so I was holding it an icepick grip, putting emphasis on the threat.

He took a second and felt his jaw before blinking some tears away and looking back at me, "Fine, here is some fucking sense for you!"

My biotics surrounded me in an instant. "Hit me with your best shot."

His fist flew forward, fast enough that I couldn't block it- even though I should have been able to with my heightened reflexes. Where it hit my chest, a sort of rift seemed to appear, causing an odd red energy to begin pouring out. Of all things, it looked like it was composed of ones and zeros. I struggled, trying to shake them off or use my biotics, but to no avail. Just as they were about to fully engulf my armor and spread to my neck he pulled his hand away, and it all faded.

Without another word he turned on his heels and began walking in the exact opposite direction as me- middle finger in the air the whole time.

I stood there a moment, baffled. A moment later, puzzlement turned to fear, and then to rage- which I was more than happy to turn upon him. _My turn. _ Activating my biotics, I threw an orb of dark energy that curved over his head and landed in front of him, slowly lifting him into the air.

I walked towards him, my singularity guaranteeing that he wouldn't be trying something like that again. "I don't know what you just did, but consider this." I held up my hand, glowing blue. "If I decided to- I don't know, throw a warp field in there- it'd cause a pretty big explosion. You would be at ground zero of that explosion- and that armor couldn't even protect you from a little cherry bomb. So with that in mind- what the hell did you just do, how the hell did you do it, and why the hell are you so convinced that Commander Raptor Shepard is a guy?"

He stared at me blankly before finding words, "I think I just figured out what's going on here. You said you killed Saren, right?"

"Along with a couple hundred of his Geth and Krogan."

He continued to swirl around the singularity but kept his thoughts organized, "Well, I messed up too. I caused Saren to kill Tali by running her through with five blades. Now, I did save her but that was because I activated a repair program. Now, what if that repair program wasn't just for my xbox but yours as well? Then, to clean them up, it took the 'junk data', otherwise known as us and through us into a recycling bin where we got put somewhere else."

I stared at him a moment before releasing the singularity. He hit the ground with a loud "Oomph".

"Okay, let me see if I've got this straight. You somehow got sucked through your Xbox into the video game known as Mass Effect, correct?" I put my hands on my temples, feeling a headache coming.

"Where have you been the last five minutes?"

I was conflicted. On the one hand, if this guy had gone through a fraction of what I had, then at least I wasn't the only one, and I had a sort of kindred spirit. On the other hand, he seemed to treat it all as a game, which would explain how he'd gotten so banged up- and why he was making it so tempting to punch him again. "Alright, maybe we should compare notes. Because what you're talking about sounds a lot different then what happened to me."

As he got back to his feet, I saw his eyes widen, focusing on a point behind me. "Yeah, great idea. But can we deal with them first?"

I spun around, and saw a squad of Geth standing right in front of us.

"Works for me." I said with a smile, flicking several knives into each hand. "Just don't go anywhere. This won't take long."

_Because these piles of scrap are just what I need to deal with this excess aggression right now. That, and they may or not have shot me with a rocket._

**Ty's POV:**

The guy let out a wordless shout as he charged at them, body covered in a biotic that moment, I had two impulses that I could follow. One, I go in omni-tool ablaze with a cryoblast here and a incinerate there. Two, I could sit back and watch the guy do his work. I figured that without a gun to back up my tech powers I might as well just sit back.

The guy slammed into the first Geth with the force of a large rhino, knocking the thing into the air. Another that was close raised its shotgun, but his barrier made it seem like it was a nerf gun. All it got for its effort was a knife to the face- not the one from his shoulder or boot either, one that seemed to come out of nowhere as he flicked his wrist.

He didn't give the others time to fire before he hurled a singularity into the middle of them, his pistol flying from his hip into his hand. Looking at it when it wasn't being pointed at me, it seemed a lot smaller than what I'd come to expect from Mass Effect- though the way their heads exploded made me think it was a lot more effective than it looked.

One of them had been far enough away that the vortex hadn't affected it. Its brilliant strategy was to run right at him with a shotgun.

He waited for it to get close, and even fire a couple of times, then he just ran at it and punched it. I could see his hand sticking clean out its back, glowing blue. He rammed the other fist in, and just yanked his hands apart, sending parts of it everywhere.

He turned back to me, the one he'd charged to start with landing in a heap behind him. "So, refresh my memory...what were you saying about me not being able to back up my 'attitude'?".

I put my hands up in submittance. "Okay, you have the skills to pay the metaphorical bills in this universe. Mind you with very little style points."

"You do realize I literally ripped the last one in half?" He said dryly.

"Yeah, and my friend Danny did that when he was drunk", I responded.

He opened his mouth, then stopped and just sighed. His face might as well have been carved from stone. "Okay, before I let you sidetrack me, let's get back to what we talking about before we were interrupted. Namely, the fact that those things are meant to stay in the realm of fantasy."

Movement behind him caught my eyes and I pointed at the woman coming over the ridge, "We can talk about that over some beers. Right now, we have company."

He turned his head to look, and nodded. "Point taken." He glanced at his hand a moment before activating his omni-tool and bringing it in front of him. "It may also be prudent to figure out where we are."

"Uh, red sky, ominous feeling in the air...and Geth. My money is on Eden Prime."

"Yeah, none of that means much to me anymore- though I'll admit it is rather similar." He said without so much as a glance away what he was doing. Then his head darted up as he read something on his omni-tool. "But it's not just the venue that's important, it's the date. The same as Saren's first attack." He looked around. "First reality jumping, now time travel... Seriously, what did I do to piss off the universe?"

"Well, I know what I did, I told the game A.I. that I wasn't going to take it's shit anymore and will do whatever the fuck I want. I'm a User after all."

The look he gave me at that was odd, but the woman was there before he could reply. She moved in swiftly, flanked by two other soldiers, "Alright, freeze."

I looked over to the guy next to me and pointed at him. "He did it. I just woke up on the ground... I think he kidnapped me."

He gave me a glare, his glowing eyes adding to the effect, before turning back to the woman, almost seeming to force himself to salute. "Lt. Jason Bourne, Alliance Military. No idea who this idiot is."

The woman gave an accusing look, "Lieutenant, check this guy's ID."

The guy next to her pulled up his omni-tool and checked over some files "I'm not seeing anything Commander." He looked at him, his gaze lingering over the red symbol on his chest.

"Bourne" let out a huff in response. "You know how unreliable the extranet can be." He shrugged. "It was a recent promotion. Previous C.O. was killed in action. Didn't really have time to do the proper paperwork."

I looked at the guy. "Um, Ash is right there. She is the C.O. for this platoon now. Good job, dumbass."

The Commander pulled her gun up higher. "Alright, both of you on the ground. I should have seen something like this coming."

I looked down at the hole in my chest and pointed at it, "Can I lay on my back? This thing jabs into me when you put pressure on it."

Bourne glanced over at me, then at his own armor, probably realizing it didn't exactly look like military gear. "Look Commander, I've had a long, stressful day, so can we just discuss this like two sane individuals instead of-" he cut himself at the look on her face. "Right, ground, got it."

I'd been expecting more resistance from him, considering how he'd been acting, but he instead just slowly lowered himself to the ground. I did the same but just sat rather than laid down. I glanced at Shepard and her look instantly told me belly down or else. It could have been sexy if it wasn't a dominatrix look.

"Not to be a smartass, but is it too late to come clean?" Bourne asked cautiously, clearly sensing the same possibility of getting shot that I was, then I formed a plan.

"Don't tell her man." I said hoping that he would catch on to my recently thought up plan.

"Don't pretend we're in the same boat here kid." He said, the latter bit really irritating to me, considering he couldn't be all that much older, and I was 24 for crying out loud. "I'm a bounty hunter, and I was stopping here for supplies. My ship was fired upon onroute, and must've crashed. When I came to-" he jerked his head my way. "This guy was unconscious on the ground not far away. Geth must've dragged us clear or something- or someone did, no idea."

...He'd totally blew it, there was no possible way we could get away with that phony story.

"And the posing as the Alliance official?" She asked skeptically.

"...I saw it in a vid once. Seemed like a good idea at the time." He glanced away from her, at his omni-tool, before returning his eyes to her.

She had a bit of distrust in her look but then she turned to me. "And your story is?"

He turned to me, and I could see a bit of interest in his expression, though not much else.

"I am just a guy in the wrong place at the wrong time but ended up in the right circumstance because of it."

"And being here lying on your stomach with destroyed armor is good because...?"

"I just met probably the hottest alliance official, this side of the Galaxy."

There was a momentary hesitation in her look before she spoke. "Flattery won't get you anywhere with me."

"It'll probably just get you shot- and I mean that in the best possible way." Bourne hastily added, glancing up at her.

I pressed my hand to the ground and focused on a rock to shoot up from the ground and right into the guys crotch. "Fine, I am Ty. I was thinking of playing hero but got my ass kicked rather fast... as you can see."

"Got a last name Ty?"

"Nope, or at least not one I can use to get me out of the boiling pot I am in."

Bourne glanced over at me again, and I saw something odd in his eyes- and I don't mean that they were glowing, I mean that they seemed to almost be sympathetic.

"Fine, I understand when your name can't get you anywhere. Lieutenant, can you get a snap of these guys?"

The man brought up his omni-tool and took a picture. "There we go Commander."

"Alright, both of you will come with us. If you try anything, we have names and faces to hunt you down so I can personally gut you with one of the many knives he seems to be carrying."

I put my hand on the ground and began to stand up. "You got it."

Bourne did likewise, though much faster since he was in better shape. "Not like I've got anything better to do anyway." He glanced over at what remained of the earlier fight. "And I've already got some practice killing these things."

She glanced behind us and took in the scene. "Good. Then you can take point."

I smiled."Baby, I can spear-head you a path right to the Beacon... oh shit."

In an instant she had a pistol on my forehead accompanying the hand she wrapped around my neck. "How the hell did you know about the beacon?!"

Bourne looked at us a moment, and then sighed. "Rumors have been flying around about that thing pretty much since it got dug up. I'm not really surprised that's what he'd assume you were talking about."

She turned her head to look at him skeptically. "That would explain why you're here."

"Well, Eden Prime was on the way anyway. I figured I could use some supplies anyway, and maybe catch a glimpse of it." He rubbed the back of his head. "Kinda wish I'd just kept going now."

Her grip on my neck tightened and for a second I thought she was going to shoot both of us and just keep moving. Then it loosened, and I could suddenly breath again. I took in a deep breath and made sure to stand as straight as possible. "Thanks."

"You know, considering that little stunt you pulled before, you're lucky I didn't just let her shoot you."

"What stunt would that be?" Shepard asked, glancing between both of us, gun still in hand.

"Nothing important."

"Yeah", I put my hand on Bourne's shoulder. "He just got a little crunched is all."

"Remove your hand from my shoulder before I cut it off." He said flatly- and in a way that said he meant it.

I moved my hand away and started down the path. "Let's get moving!"

"Right, because having the guy with armor like that take point makes perfect sense." Bourne said. A moment later, he was right next to me, biotics fading away.

. "How about I take point, and you try not to do anything else to antagonize her." he said in a low voice. "You're lucky I was able to keep her from shooting you. And I get the feeling she ain't as nice and friendly as the version I knew."

"Yeah, I know. She's like a breath of fresh air, especially after my last girlfriend... dibs", I shot before he could counter.

For the first time, I witnessed his face actually show expression as he stopped short, jaw open, putting a hand in front of me to stop me as well. "Are you actually as stupid as you look?"

"Are you as much of an Edward rip off as your eyes suggest?"

"Not exactly like I asked for these things. And at least I'm not talking about code and programing the whole time. Where do you think we are "Neo", the bloody matrix?"

I focused my powers into my eyes and let the red shine out of them. "At least I can look sinister when I make mine glow."

He turned to face me fully, biotics surrounding his hands, and his eyes blazing. "I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt on that, but I should warn you: the last guy with eyes like that- I killed. And if turns out that you're really him, the way I killed you last time will look quick and painless by comparison."

"Hey, keep moving", Shepard ordered.

I slapped him on the back and we kept moving, "What's wrong bro? Forming an ultimatum? Am I going to send you on a quest for supremacy? Did you perchance lose your identity?"

He grabbed me by throat and lifted me into the air. "That was strike two. If I see one more thing to make me even suspect you could be that guy-" he let the threat hang in the air before abruptly dropping me, causing me to land on my ass.

I rubbed my throat and continued forward, "Geez, what is it with people and my neck. Does it look like it needs a hug?"

"Hey, here's an idea- let's play the 'shut up before the biotic warps you apart' game."

I threw on my classic smile and stopped at the edge of the mountain, "Looks like we are about to find a dead Nihlus."

He glanced back at Shepard, then looked at me like I was nuts. "You want to not say shit like that where she can hear? Or did you forget that she had a gun aimed at your head not five minutes ago for mentioning the fucking beacon? She hears something like that, and you'll be envying my face- if you survive, which is extremely unlikely."

I looked back at Shepard right as the gunshot went off, "There was a Turian down there, looked like he got taken down by one of those things the Geth left on spikes."

"Then why are you still standing there?" She said, pulling her sniper rifle over her shoulder and taking aim.

"Do me a favor." Bourne said as he whipped out his shotgun. "Keep your fire to the left so I don't get taken down by a stray bullet."

"What do you-" She was cut off as he glowed biotically, and launched himself into one of the husks on the platform, taking off the head of another with his shotgun.

I saw that I had just been left at the starting gate of the race and activated my omnitool. It still had the blue cryoblast button and the green overload. That meant that we were about to see some exploding popsicles.

I took off down the mountain to the first available cover and located a Geth in the open. I hit the blue button quickly and a white drone flew from my palm and into the Geth, knocking him back and freezing him in place.

The iceblast was big enough that it knocked a nearby Geth out of cover. I took the moment to hit him with an incinerate, catching him on fire and making him dance like a maniac. Last, I finished with an overload and chained it so that both Geth went up like firecrackers.

Looking over to the right I saw Bourne just finishing off the last of his two Geth and look up toward us. To the left was nothing but headless Geth compliments of Shepard's rifle skills.

"Guess some things don't change." He commented as he looked at them.

"What are you talking about?", I questioned.

"I knew… someone very much like her who was also a sniper." He said, sliding his shotgun back onto his waist. "Though that one didn't point a gun at me as often."

**Shepard:**

It always happened on Tuesday for Shepard. Last Tuesday she got into a bar fight thanks to Corperal Jenkins' over celebrations. The Tuesday before that was having to meet and deal with a new Alliance Admiral. This Tuesday, she met two blathering idiots who kept covering something up.

It was in the way they spoke, both of them had a big mind for self-preservation but at the same time, they looked out for each other. At least enough to stop her from putting a bullet in one's head. They also seemed to have already figured something out. Like they had one thing in common that made them both in the same boat.

Whatever it was, she would find out... later. Right now, she needed to get to the Beacon as fast as possible. And the many dead Geth showed how useful they could be in doing that.

Shepard looked down the hill to the cargo dock and figured that would be the best place to search. Still, to her right was a workers outpost. It might be a good idea to get some supplies. Maybe a pistol for Ty, if she could trust him with one. Or better yet, some armor that wasn't completely destroyed.

Going with her better judgement, she turned right and began walking to the camp. "Alenko, Williams. Take my flank. If there are people in here, treat as hostile."

"Yes, sir", they both rang out.

She came up to the door to the container and punched in a few simple keys to make it open. As soon as she did, colonists came flooding out ready to fight for their lives. At the head of the pack was one holding a Stinger mark II pistol.

"Alright, we don't want any trouble."

Shepard pointed at him, holding her thumb and index finger in a gun position, "If we wanted some, you wouldn't have taken two steps out of that door before getting a bullet through the brain."

The man settled down a bit, more out of fear than comfort but still held the gun, "How do we know you aren't working with the Geth?"

"Because, we aren't synthetic", Gunnery Chief Williams called from Shepard's right.

She was surprised to suddenly hear Bourne's voice from right behind her. "Also, if they were going to kill you, they wouldn't bother telling you first." She turned her head, seeing him standing there with his arms crossed. _How did he get there without us noticing?_

She heard footsteps on her left and turned that direction. "Yeah, it's not like we were planning on gutting you and using your skin for fuel or anything", She glared at Ty, but. he just smiled at her and made his way around her, up to the head colonist. "So, you picking up what I am putting down?"

The colonist let the gun wobble a bit, "I don't get what you are saying."

"Shame, now I have to do this." Ty brought his hand up and smacked the bottom of the gun into the air and caught it as it fell down.

Shepard looked at him like he was crazy, "Did you-?"

"Catching it was completely by accident", Ty said as he laughed and smiled at the gun in his hand. "By the way, I got dibs on this thing."

"Not like any of us need one." Bourne said with a shrug.

"Fine, whatever." Shepard turned to the colonists, "You can take the fact that we are not shooting you as proof that we are not allied with the Geth."

The man pulled his hands back and rubbed his neck with his left hand, "Okay, but you can't just leave us here without a weapon."

In response, Bourne put his hand on his arm, and pulled off one of the odd rectangles that wrapped around it. He walked past the rest of them and handed it to him. "Take it or leave it."

The colonist looked at it, and pressed an indent on the end, nearly dropping it as a blade suddenly shot out of what she realized was a hilt.

"Works for me." Shepard said. "Let's keep moving."

She turned her back on the colonists and walked away, and gave Ty a come hither gesture with her hand. He looked over at Bourne and smiled before running up to her and walked along her right. "You need something Shepard?"

Turning quickly, she pivoted on her toes and brought her fist down so hard on his face that he fell backwards onto the ground. Then she walked up to him and knelt near his face. "Don't you ever, ever disarm a hostile without my go ahead. Those colonists were startled and could have attacked at the slightest provocation.. You got lucky, but we could have had a massacre on our hands because of you."

He just groaned and brought his hand up to his face. Shepard then smiled and patted him on the cheek, "That being said, it was pretty cool that you caught it in the air."

As she stood up, she saw Bourne looking at her, his face completely expressionless- though that seemed to be its only mode from what she'd seen. "Something wrong Bourne?"

"Not really. Though I doubt that three civilians would have been able to take three trained marines and a biotic. Hell, I could have knocked them out 12 different ways and not broken a sweat."

She took a step towards him. "Care to repeat that?"

He glanced at Ty, still on the ground. "No, I'm fine being able to stand, thanks."

"Just because you're less irritating than him-"

"I think that's the first time anybody has ever said that about me in comparison to literally anyone."

"-Doesn't mean I won't put a bullet in your head just as quickly as I would him."

She was somewhat irritated that the threat didn't even seem to phase him. "Noted. You want me to help him up?"

Shepard forced a smile that probably looked more scary than happy. "Please."

**S7: So, good new and bad news. Good news is that this chapter was a complete success. Bad news is that I am now hospitalized after being hit by a Hummer. Anyone want to sign my cast?**

**T117:Oh stop whining; you've got another arm/leg.**

**S7: Actually, I can't move. Broke every large bone in my body. Had them form the cast so that I could sit at my computer and type along with watching the Super Bowl.**

**T117: Go Seahawks! Anyway, that'll do it for this chapter.**

**S7: Tune in next time to see Bourne sing karaoke.**

**T117: Yeah, he's kidding.**

**S7: No I'm not!**

**T117: You know, a lesser man would simply edit that bit out before he posts this chapter.**

**S7: Well, a lesser man would make a joke about you and your skills in the Mass Effect Multiplayer.**

**T117:...Touche. On the other hand, which one of us was dumb enough to play Frogger in real life here?**

**S7: Frogger is the greatest game ever and you know it!**

**T117: If you love it so much, why don't you go write some fanfic for it?**

**S7: I… You… Just… Challenge accepted. It will be up by Friday.**

**T117: That was meant more as a sort of ironic statement or comment on what we both do...But now I kinda want to see if that's even possible.**

**S7: I'll just have to put it in the misc. section or pull a Sergius and get FanFic to put a section up.**

**T117:...Seriously. I was kidding when I said that before. Mostly because I thought my alternative comment about "Which one of us has more followers?" would be too much of a dick move.**

**S7: Too late, challenge has been accepted. I'm off to write the fiction. It will have suspense, romance and action. In the end, Frogger will discover something about himself.**

**T117: What horrors have I wrought?...Also, why does this seem like something Iron would really love?**

**S7: I think the only thing that Iron would really love is if he went jump, jump and splat.**

**T117:...Anyway, I think that'll wrap this chapter up folks. **

**S7: Yeah, I am going to go jump on the multiplayer and solo some Platinum.**

**T117: Meanwhile, I am either going to keep working on the MK9 story mode, or try to get those last Datapacks in Arkham Origins. (Yeah, I know, I'm a bit behind on those games.)**

**S7: MK9… I just had an idea for later in the story. Quick, to the Users cave!**

**T117: I think I'm just going to blame your behavior on the pain meds. Anyway, Sayonara. **


	3. One's an Idiot, The Other is a Lunatic

**Bourne:**

Somehow, the smile Shepard gave me was scarier than the knowledge she _would _put a bullet in my head if I pissed her off. It was odd how this version reminded me so much of Raptor in some ways, yet was so completely different in others.

It wasn't as though they looked anything alike. Her hair was crimson, and her eyes were emerald green. And I'd never seen Raptor wear makeup in all the time I'd known her, yet this version had blush, purple eyeliner, and lipstick in nearly the same shade.

But it looked like she was every bit the sniper that my friend was, and- judging by the state of the guy on the ground- she hit every bit as hard.

As I knelt to help him up, it was similarities to another version that had me worried. I'd been stabbed, shot, and had my liver -_my goddamn liver!_- replaced last time- and that was with a paragon. With a renegade, I didn't like my odds.

Ty grunted as he got to his feet.

"Still want to call dibs?" I asked in a low voice.

He cracked his neck, "Yep."

"I'll be sure to give you a nice eulogy."

He put on the same dorky smile that he had earlier, "Ah, you do care."

I gave him a flat stare. "Only because you might be useful later on. And I put strong emphasis on the might."

I was half expecting another answer about how he was a "User" as he called it, and was able to manipulate code and all that nerdy stuff. It wasn't quite the same as Iron's rants about how we could warp reality, but it was close enough to put me on my guard around him. _Not to mention that little stunt where he seemed to be trying to "matrix" me. Or when he sent the rock into my crotch. Never thought I'd actually be glad to have armor there._

"Don't worry, uh, what's your full name?"

"I already said: Jason Bourne. Or did you want my middle name?"

His smile went to a smirk, "No, you said Lieutenant Bourne. But that's alright Jason, I forgive you for your lack of good memory."

I almost opened my mouth to tell him how good my memory was, but I stopped myself short. For one thing, if he didn't know that I was recording everything he said, he might let something slip that'd help me out. And I wasn't going to let myself be baited by anyone this immature.

"Well, apparently I got demoted ending up here." I said, irritated. _And no way I'll be lucky enough to get Anderson to promote me this time._

_ "S_ounds like you lost your legacy.", He followed.

_I swear, I half hope this guy is Iron. Then it'll be twice as fun to kill him. _"Sounds like you're the one with terrible memory now. Or did you forget what I said about those types of jokes?"

He looked at me questioningly, "What jokes?"

"Identity? Supremacy? Ultimatum? Legacy?...Bourne?"

"And those words rhyme? Is that the joke? Wait, Ultimatum doesn't. I give up, what's so funny?"

"Oh for the love of- Bourne Identity? Bourne Supremacy? Matt Damon?"

Something sparked in his vision, "Oh, Matt Damon is the coolest action hero. I have seen all his movies."

"How the fuck can you say that and never have even heard of the Bourne series? You know, a guy wakes up without any memory and goes looking for his past, turns out he's actually an assassin?"

His mouth opened but then he stopped, closed it and thought for a second. "So, what you're saying is... There are Matt Damon movies I haven't seen?! That's just ridiculous!." He quickly pulled up his omni-tool and began searching the extranet. "Holy, shit. Those are movies? Does that mean you stole your name from a Matt Damon movie?"

"For christsakes, what the hell did you think I was trying to say?" I suddenly had to force my face back to its blank slate, before I could let the desire to slap myself be seen. _Great, way to all but tell him-_

He cut me off, "So, what, do you not remember your real name?"

I didn't respond, which seemed to be all the evidence he needed to realize that was the case, judging by his stupid grin. I'd only rarely felt such a strong desire to make someone eat their own teeth.

"Bet I can help you with that."

"Do I look like I need your help? And if you think answering in the affirmative is wise, I'll tell you now that it isn't."

He rolled his eyes and began walking to catch up with Shepard's squad, "Look, even Kevin Flynn needed help. And he was more versed in programming than I am."

It took me a moment to recognize the Tron reference, but I was beginning to think that he was as crazy as Iron. The only thing that made me hesitate was that way he'd opened a hole in my chest and let out those weird red numbers. I still couldn't think of an explanation for that.

_ Come on, don't be nuts, Raptor was a hell of a lot more than just a bunch of coding. And so is everything here. _

I shook my head, seeing that they already standing around Nihlus's body. _ Which means that it's my fault that he died- again! I already did all of this once! Why did I end up here again! And with this... "User" to boot?! Not to mention that this Shepard is like Raptor mixed with Iron and a splash of... no, actually just those two._

I took a breath to focus myself, then biotically sent myself to where they were. "What happened to him?" I pretended to ask.

"Got face fucked by a bullet", Ty answered, failing to hide the fact that he was about to laugh.

"Yeah, except that's the back of the head, not his face. I can see that. I was referring to how said bullet managed to hit said head."

"Dude, it came out the front of his face." He rolled his eyes as he said it and began looking around.

Shepard turned around and looked at me like I was an idiot, "Because it launched out the barrel of a gun and did so." She looked from me over to Ty, "And I thought you were the stupid one."

I had to bite back my typical response to this sort of thing, not wanting to end up the same way. "What I mean is-" I pretended to stop short, head jerking towards the crates like I'd heard something. I walked towards them, and as I got close enough to peer over one of them, I saw the expected dockworker.

_Least I've still got that much on my side. _"I don't suppose you saw what happened to him."

"Hey, leave me out of this."

"That didn't sound like a no."

Shepard walked over, gun in hand. "Seems pretty cut and dried what happened here. So if you did see what happened, then there should be no problem in your telling us."

He looked from me to her, and it was plain that he didn't know who to be more scared of. I wasn't pointing a gun at him, but Shepard didn't have crimson scars or glowing eyes. "Alright, I saw him get shot."

"By the Geth?" Shepard asked.

"Yeah."

She fired a round near his leg. "You know, I really can't stand liars. Who shot him?"

"Okay, okay, it was another Turian. He was here when the other guy arrived. They talked, and the dead guy seemed to let his guard down. Then he shot him right through the head- didn't even see him coming."

"Description. Now." Shepard said.

Ty quickly cut in, "Hey, I am going to go have a look around... so, I will meet up with you at the transports over there."

Shepard just waved him off, "Fine, whatever. Description."

"I don't know, I haven't seen all that many Turians."

She fired another round, this time by his head, making him yelp as a stain began to spread across his pants.

"Did he have any facial markings? Anything that'd make him stand out? Did you hear a name or anything?" I probed, trying to help him out- or at least keep him alive until he mentioned a certain Spectre. _That may be the one upside- I get the chance to kill _him _all over again._

"No, no face markings at all. Just one shade of silver- but one of his hands looked robotic. And I think the other guy called him... uh, I don't remember, something with an S."

"Then I hope your memory improves pretty quickly." Shepard said, shifting the gun so it was aimed right at his head.

"Soren, or Sauron or something! I don't know!"

"Saren?" I *asked*, pretending to be shocked.

"Yeah, that was it." He said, relief mixed with fear.

"You know the name?" Shepard asked me, her eyes never leaving him, and her aim not wavering at all.

"Turian Spectre- known for having a thing against humans too."

Her head turned towards me a moment, then back at him. "Anything else you want to tell me?"  
"No."

She looked over at me. "I think he's hiding something."

"Yeah, me too. Come on pal, be smart and just tell... " I trailed off. "Jesus H Christ, how the hell did I end up being good cop?! I'm never good cop!" I sent my own pistol into my hand and pointed it at him. "You start talking, or you start dying."

The guy wiped sweat off his forehead and hoisted a bag onto the crate, "Alright, I stashed a bag of grenades here for if I got in trouble but you can take them... free of charge."

"What makes you think I would have paid for them?" Shepard asked rhetorically as she stashed her gun, grabbing a handful of the devices from the bag. "Can you use these things without blowing yourself up?"

"Yeah, but I got no room to store them unless I ditch the knives on my belt. And I can't exactly get replacements from my ship since that's... you know, shot down."

"Fine, then as much as I'd hate it...Ty, I am going to have you carry some." There was no answer and Shepard looked around, "Ty? Where the hell is that Tweedle Dumb?!"

I turned in the direction of the transports, and heard gunfire. "By the sounds of it, getting himself killed. But maybe I'm just being optimistic."

"Let's go save his ass." She said irritably.

Kaidan ended up grabbing the bag and we all ran over to see what he was doing. Just as we reached the corner, the gunfire stopped and there was a loud gushing sound. Shepard gave the signal to halt and she peeked around the corner.

"That son-of-a-bitch."

I looked next and saw Ty standing over a destroyed Geth, trying to match some armor he'd torn off it with the hole in his chest.

I hated to admit it, even to myself, but I was impressed as I saw the multitude of dead Geth. _So he's not as bad in a fight as he looks. But that just means I have to keep an even closer eye on him. _

He caught us all staring at him, "Hey, you missed the show!

Shepard walked over to him and instead of a pat on the shoulder or a good job, she gave him another right hook to the face- not that I was surprised by that point. "Don't you ever leave the team like that again or you'll end up like these things did."

He just stood up with an angry look on his face. If I hadn't such good facial control, I'd have flinched on his behalf as he said "Don't hit me when I just saved you a lot of trouble. I am a lot more powerful than your pathetic Sentinel and Soldier. I am a motherfucking User baby. And that means I can do shit you only read about in the bible."

_Wow. Even _I_ never dug myself a grave that deep. It's like a trainwreck- too horrible to watch, but I kinda want to. _

I crossed my arms, curious to see how Shepard would respond.

She looked back at me. "Do you have any idea what he's blathering about?"

"He ought to. He's one too."

I sighed. "He was saying this shit after he woke up too- I figure he must've gotten a concussion or something."

He crossed his arms and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Fine, fine. Let's just take this damn transport and get this over with."

"No, no, go ahead. I want to hear this." She said, crossing her arms as well.

"Come on, why make him embarrass himself?" I commented, hoping he'd take the hint and shut up about it.

He dropped his arms and cracked his neck. Slowly from his left arm, that same weird "code" crawled out over his body as it morphed and changed. He grew taller and his armor grew heavier and thicker until the code fell away revealing a 7 foot Spartan in green Mjolnir looked down at Shepard.

"Am I supposed to be embarrassed?"

I instantly had a collapsed knife in each hand, holding them ready to activate, a similar scene in my mind- what I'd thought was an alternate version of myself walking towards me, grey cameo shifting in a blaze of red energy to Iron's crimson armor.

If I'd been hurt on a mission, and been knocked out... _It wouldn't be the first time Iron pulled this type of thing. But why would he hide behind this guy's face? If he was somehow still alive and able to do this, he'd have just started attacking me- and he'd be sure I knew it was him. _

_Which means this guy can't be Iron- but that doesn't mean he's less dangerous. Especially not like that._

Shepard acted in a way that I didn't expect- she chuckled. "Hah, good to see you put your big boy pants on there. Now, let's get moving. Mister "User" here has point. That means let him take all the fire for you."

"...What."

"Did I stutter Bourne?"

"So, you're not remotely curious how the fuck he did that?"

She shrugged, "Might as well let him be the target, he is a walking wall now. Probably just a slow tank fighter. Like a Geth Prime."

I stared between them with open disbelief. "Are you actually that crazy?"

I saw the look on her face and I charged backwards as she swung. She still only barely missed me and I just got lucky enough to not end up like Ty. Without saying a word, she turned around and got on the transport.

_Christ, I thought the universe screwed me last time. Seriously, what did I do to deserve this?_

**Ty:**

I just stood in the center of the platform with my arms crossed, watching Ashley and Kaidan take confused looks at me. Jason on the other hand was just watching me intently, hiding something in his hands. Instead of copying the others, Shepard checked her sniper rifle and made sure she was ready for what was to come.

All in all, I was completely bored for the ride. It took a lot longer in the game then the damn loading screens in real life. Luckily, my armor didn't change back to normal along the way. That could mean that the rules for my power were different in this version than my version where I had a ten minute time limit.

A smile came to my lips as I began thinking of all the benefits of the spartan armor. I chinned the controls and switched my external speakers off. Once the audio-symbol turned to mute, I opened a private chat channel to Jason.

"Hey, Jason, you can't answer back without looking like you are talking to yourself."

He didn't respond in the slightest. That just meant I would have to turn it up a notch to get him to respond. I quickly thought of everything he told me and asked one question that I knew was a tender subject.

"So, you can't remember your name. What if you were named something hilarious like Seymour."

He turned to look at me, face unchanged, arms still crossed.

"Bet your last name might have been Butz. Get it? Seymour Butz?"

Still no reaction on his face, but I saw his hand clench for a moment.

"Yeah, I think I would rename myself too if I had a name like that. Or Hugh Jass."

He raised an eyebrow, and gave me a look that seemed to say "that the best you got?"

I looked ahead and saw the transfer station coming up. "Alright, looks like the fun is over. Remind me to buy you a beer for keeping a straight face through all that."

He turned to look at the transport station as well. "Looks like the fun's just about to start. And as I recall, you get to be the bullet magnet now."

I began loosening up, moving my arms and legs trying to make sure I wouldn't be restricted when I was running. The only thing I noticed was wrong was that I picked the Mark VI armor. That meant that I could jump higher than in most games but I also couldn't sprint. I figured I would just have to adapt around it.

The transport came in and I took off running up the ramp faster than Shepard's team. But Bourne had already charged ahead of me thanks to a Geth standing on the side of the railing. He took cover behind the railing, and started shooting at them with his assault rifle.

I pulled the Stinger off my side and locked it in. The suit's internalized circuits took over and the ammunition along with the sights came up on my HUD.

I got to the top of the ramp and was immediately met with by a Geth Destroyer. He sprinted full bored at me and fired off a carnage shot. I ended up sidestepping his shot and slammed a fist into his eye. Unlike the shields the Mark VI had, the Geth's shields only stopped fast projectiles. That meant he took the full force of my blow while I felt nothing.

"Ty, look out", Shepard barked from behind me.

I quickly checked the motion tracker and saw a hostile to the left. At a glance I saw it was a rocket trooper. He had already fired a shot and I didn't have time to move. I quickly turned just enough to take the rocket in the back rather than my chest.

The blow sent me flying forward and I slid across the floor. My eyesight was blurred for a moment but it came back as fast as it went. I sat my hands on the ground and pushed myself up, noticing that my armor had blackened and the shields weren't restoring.

My mind raced at a million miles an hour at the possibilities but something in my gut told me that I should just ignore it for now. I brought my pistol into aiming position and looked around. Jason looked like he was having some trouble dealing with a Prime and a few friends so I rushed across the bridge to help him.

Just as I got across a Destroyer charged out from behind a box to attack him while he was preoccupied with trying to keep the Prime from getting back to its shotgun, which he'd pulled from its grasp somehow. I quickly intercepted the destroyer and grabbed it's arm that fired the shotgun. It tried to take a swing at me but I used the superior strength of the Mark VI to throw him over the edge of the railing.

As soon as he fell the armor fully disintegrated and I was only left with the under armour of what I had on before. Three shots ripped through my right shoulder and I realized that the shielding circuits for my armor were in the bulk. Not the suit underneath.

I brought my hand up and hit the comm, "Shepard, back-up... quickly."

My eyesight went out of whack again and I realized I was going into a low state of shock. I pulled up my omni-tool and fumbled with it to find the medigel. I found the application program and opened it to find I was out. I took a few steps into cover and leaned against a box.

This definitely wasn't how I wanted this day to go. I'd imagined the worst of my worries being a hangover from last night. Not a redo of the last three weeks of my life.

I turned my head to look at Bourne as he let out a loud shout- like the type of corny thing you might hear in a kung-fu movie.

He was beating the prime with its own ripped off arm, finally knocking the head clean off, sending it flying until it slid to a stop at my feet. He followed its path, and saw me- minus my armor.  
"Why am I expecting you to make a baseball joke now?" He commented as he threw the arm at a trooper that had gotten back to its feet, stunning it long enough for him to blow its head off with his pistol.

I opened my mouth to reply but all that I could do was cough up some blood. My hand fell down from my shoulder and I saw that it was covered in a lot of blood. _Heh, I don't remember planning to dye my armor._

I saw Bourne glance over, and he did a double take, a blue aura surrounding him.

He was suddenly right next to me, throwing an arm up and surrounding us both with a dome of energy- seconds before a rocket exploded into it.

He dropped the shield, punching first with his right hand, then his left- sending a warp and throw respectively-causing an explosion that left the legs of the Geth toppling for a moment without a torso before falling to the ground.

"You know, I'd have stuck with the Mjolnir armor, personally. But if you want to go around in that hunk of junk-" he turned to me, face expressionless. "You might want to not let them actually hit you."

I tried so hard to force some words out of my mouth but the best I could do was raise my hand up and give him the bird. He spoke something after that but I couldn't hear it. My hearing had shut down. Then, just as my eyes were growing dim, Shepard arrived and knelt down next to me. She pulled up her omni-tool and linked it to mine. Once she was sure she had a good connection she hit the medigel program and I felt everything come rushing back to me.

"Wooh, that's the stuff."

"Well, I suppose that answers my question of 'is he alright?'" Bourne commented.

The Commander put her hand on my forehead and used her thumb to lift my eyelids. "He looks like he lost a bit more blood than the medigel can replace. He's going to have to stay in our medbay for a little bit."

Medbay, that meant Chakwas, and if this game was anything like my last one... screw that. I waved Shepard off and pushed myself up trying to look like I was fine. She just shook her head and called everyone in.

"Okay, that's the last of the bombs. Now, we need to find that beacon."

Bourne was gone in an instant, at the other end of the platform. "Uh, we're looking for a big green glowing thing, right? Because that's right down there." He said, pointing down the ramp. "Along with a few Geth."

The way he disappeared down the ramp emphasised that last bit. I pushed off the box that I was leaning against and began walking down the ramp to catch up. Shepard and the others rushed on ahead but not before Shepard gave me a look that said stay back.

_By now, she should have figured out that I'm not going to follow her orders_. I walked into the mix and saw them run over to a bridge and begin shooting down the husks on the other side. Left of that, Bourne was on the catwalk fighting off a few Geth but he wasn't paying attention to one that had snuck by this slaughter house.

I stuck up my omni-tool and hit it with a quick cryoblast before it could get him fully in it's sights. Then I gave it a one two shot with my pistol. The Geth exploded into shards that melted quickly.

He spun around as he heard it shatter, still holding on to the Geth that he'd been dealing with. He looked at the spot, confused, then looked up and saw me holding my pistol. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, but judging by the way he ripped off the Geth's head and stomped on it, he wasn't keen on the idea that I'd saved his hide.

**Shepard:**

All the Geth had been taken care of and the last of the husks were finished. That just left the Beacon work. Shepard took a walk over to the beacon and called all the team over

Ty was holding his shoulder but trying to look like he was fine. She could only assume that he had a fear of doctors. Ashley and Kaidan both looked like they had seen hell today and she couldn't blame them. Kaidan and her had just lost Corporal Jenkins and Ashley had lost her entire platoon.

Bourne was the special case, he looked like he was just some idiot. He always had this blank look on his face like he was too stupid to realize what was going on. Yet, when he spoke or showed any sign of emotion, she saw he was a lot more than he appeared. And he clearly knew what he was doing when it came to a fight.

"Okay, equipment check. Everyone alright?"

Ashley looked at her armor and she saluted, "All good here ma'am."

"Everything on me seems to check out Commander", Kaidan boasted.

Ty rolled his eyes and rubbed his shoulder, "I could really go for some pie to be honest."

Bourne reached up to massage his temples. "Other than a headache from listening to Ty, nothing worth reporting."

Shepard walked from each person inspecting them, once she got by Bourne she let a smile come to her face. One swift motion and she gave him a shot to the stomach that made him flinch. No matter how hard it hit or how badly he wanted to double over, he still had his expressionless face. Making the punch a little less satisfying, but just a little.

"Now that we are all settled up from earlier. I'll contact the Normandy and have a shuttle come and pick us up."

She looked Bourne in the eye, noticing how they seemed to glow faintly- cybernetics were her guess. "And you're coming with us along with your friend. We have a nice holding cell on the Normandy for you."

His face didn't change. "First off, he's anything but my friend. Secondly, trying to arrest me would just end up with a lot of injuries for all involved. So how about we try something else where you keep the pistol on your hip and I keep my biotics in check."

Shepard chimed in with a quick retort, "You mean like I have the Normandy fly into low orbit and we test our new cannons on you? That can be fun and for science right?"

"Yeah, if you're trying to scare _me_, you'll have to do a lot better than that. I was thinking more along the lines of you dropping that little instance of my stupidity in exchange for me signing up with the Alliance."

"And you think I'll go for that... why?"

"Note the many Geth torn apart by biotics. I've received as much combat training and experience as any career marine- if not more- and I don't think you're the type of person to throw that kind of talent away." He paused, seeming to weigh something.

"You're lucky enough I am offering you a ride to the Citadel. Don't try convincing me to actually make you a Lieutenant. You'd be lucky if you made Corporal."

He opened his mouth to reply, but she didn't give him the chance, turning her back on him and towards the other idiot she'd picked up.

Shepard walked from him over to Ty, "And what kind of deals, trouble, or noises will you be making?"

Ty let out a sigh, "I just want some goddamn pie."

"...Okay", Shepard turned from the group and pulled up her comm, "Shepard to Normandy, we need a pick up. We've got the Beacon secured."

Anderson's voice came over calm and cool, "Roger that Shepard, is Nihlus with you?"

"Negative. KIA. He was apparently murdered by a Spectre named Saren."

"Saren? There? Are you sure?"

"Fairly."

There was silence for a moment. "This is troubling news. Be prepared for a full debrief after you get back. I'm sending the shuttle to pick you up now."

"Yes, sir", Shepard replied as she turned back around.

"Ah!" the voice came from behind her and was panicked.

Shepard turned around and saw Kaidan getting pulled toward the Beacon. She looked over at Bourne, Ashley and Ty but they didn't seem to know what to do. Taking matters into her own hands, she rushed in and grabbed him by the waist. No matter how hard the pull of the Beacon. She managed to toss Kaiden clear but got caught in its grasp. It lifted her up and slithered its way into her mind, causing images to flash before her- distorted and impossible to understand.

There were machines, and there were people, then there were machine people. There was a word being repeated, no screamed. Harvest, it just continued over and over again. Harvest, harvest, harvest everything.

The vision stopped and she fell to the ground with a thud.

**S7: I will never be this excited ever again. 43 to 8, someone tell the Broncos to go back home.**

**T117: Yeah, what he said. Also, having taken about fifty tries to finally beat Shiva without taking damage, can I just say that Batman may be the most badass non powered human ever to be put in a game?**

**S7: No, he's not. That title belongs to Gordon Freeman. Also, the Frogger fic is going amazing.**

**T117: Did Gordon Freeman beat the hell out of the guy so awesome he was the inspiration for frikken Deadpool?**

**S7: He could with his crowbar. Plus, he is a physicist that became the hope for humanity with nothing but a pair of glasses and a bright orange suit of power armor. And Deadpool may have been based on Deathstroke but he has long since surpassed him in fanbase and glory.**

**T117: Have you not seen the more recent stuff with Deathstroke? Like Young Justice or Injustice: Gods Among Us?...Also, I think we just found the one way to make a fanfic even more nerdy. **

**S7: Look, out of the two of them, who got a video game about them?**

**T117:...Are we talking about Freeman and Batman still, or...?**

**S7: DEADPOOL!**

**T117: Pssh, that game sucked…Wow, I could almost feel you glaring at me as I wrote that. I was being totally sarcastic FYI. So yeah, fair point. **

**S7: Dude, what you said is Heresy. You can forget about me picking your ass up in any multiplayer game. ANY!**

**T117: I didn't say a thing. I typed it.**

**S7: Smart ass. Anyway, I think that wraps up everything we are going to talk about. Please Review, PM, like, comment, favorite, blah blah blah. And let us know who you think would win in a four way fight between Batman, Gordon Freeman, Deadpool and Deathstroke. (I put Deadpool before Deathstroke for a reason.)**

**T117: Duh, healing factor. (Also, please leave your reviews as Anons so I can delete the ones that would make him right.)**

**S7: I hope you get syphilis.**

**T117: I think I have slightly higher standards than your mother. Yeah, I just went there. **

**S7: Dude, too far.**

**T117: Yeah, alright, maybe a bit. Bet it got a laugh from a few people reading though. Someone has to make up for the lack of Iron in this story. **

**S7: Yeah, I would say I miss him but I don't.**

**T117:...Me too?**

**S7: Please we all know that Iron was your real SI in SiaWoF.**

**T117: Actually, all three of them were. Hero was the conscience and morality and whatnot, Bourne is my more normal personality...Iron's the side I try not to let out in public...I'd rather not get into what Raptor is.**

**S7: You know, when I first read your story I thought you might have based her on like an older sister or cousin.**

**T117: Only child. Mostly, I made stuff up as I went the first time, went back and streamlined things in the reboot/rewrite/whatever.**

**S7: You know, I kind of wish I had based Ty on myself.**

**T117: At least you gave him a backstory. That's half the reason Bourne has amnesia- makes it easier to justify him wanting to stay, saves me from giving him a backstory very much, and it fits with the name. **

**S7: Yeah, but I based Ty off my seven year old little brother. **

**T117: God, that explains _so _much.**

**S7: The kid has got enough drive to take second in Idaho State Wrestling in his first year. I wanted a character with that same drive so I just asked him what he would do if he could have a video game character's armor.**

**T117:..Well, I wrestled from Sixth grade up till Senior Year in highschool, and am still involved...so I guess Bourne and Ty sorta have something in common?**

**S7: Too bad we can't bring that in the story to get them to try and get along.**

**T117: Nah, having them bicker is more fun.**

**S7: True, and this authors notes has gone on long enough so I am going to pop some pain meds and enjoy euphoria.**

**T117: Try not to get run over this time. Anyway, sayonara. **


	4. Hitchiking Across the Galaxy

**Bourne:**

I glared at Shepard's back as she walked away, still having a bit of trouble breathing from her blow. Even with armor, it felt like I'd been kicked by a mule.

_Guess that answers the question of how hard she can hit. Either Raptor was holding back, or this one's even stronger. I don't know which of those possibilities I dislike more._

I turned my attention from her to the two Marines. I hadn't been ignoring them, but they hadn't consumed my attention so much as the other two, since I was fairly certain they were actually sane.

Ashley in particular held my eye- for obvious reasons, which I tried to keep my mind away from. I could control my facial muscles, but not how red they'd turn if given the chance. It was odd seeing her in medium armor again, compared to the heavy armor she'd had when I last saw her. And while my version hadn't lost all of her rough edges, I'd worn some of them down and gotten her softer side to show.

This version looked just as ready to shoot me as Shepard did, albeit nowhere near as eager.

With Alenko, it wasn't so cut and dried. Last time I'd seen him, he'd been lying in a hospital bed, paralyzed. When I tried saving him from his fate on Virmire, one of my knives had 'accidently' ended up severing his spine, paralyzing him from the waist down. My own ability to warp reality had conspired against me to make sure he'd still be unable to fight on.

It was hard to even meet his eyes without feeling guilty for something I'd yet to even do. Or worse, knowing that he'd live while Ashley died. Just the thought of that made my blood boil,. even as shivers ran down my spine.

As for Ty... I'd yet to decide. He was annoying and immature when he wanted to be, but I wasn't all that dissimilar not so long ago. And I'd seen a few glimpses of how he fought back on the platform. I doubted he'd received much formal training- if any- but he was better than I'd expected. _Then again, he somehow turned himself into Master Chief, so I guess he had an advantage with that._

_ That's two things I don't get: How he did it, and why he switched back. If he could have armor like that- or maybe better- why would he still be wearing that worn out piece of crap? _It was more than troubling. On the one hand, if doing it tired him out or something- a possible explanation for why he'd switched back- it meant he would be vulnerable when his abilities ran out. But when they were working... I was probably one of the most powerful human biotics in existence; maybe even the most. But that didn't mean I wanted to go up against a Big Daddy, or Iron Man. With no idea what he was really capable of, I couldn't take any risks.

_ At least I saved his life, so I won't owe him for saving mine. Then again, I had a barrier up, so I doubt that the Geth could have taken me down before I could turn around and deal with it. _

I could see him now, apparently chatting with Kaidan.

"You dip shit. Just because I can change my armor doesn't mean I can keep it that way." I was easily able to pick up his raised voice.

_Or rather, arguing with Kaidan. At least he's bugging someone other than me. Or Shepard. _I could see her off to the side, evidently telling Anderson about the beacon- and about Saren. _Which means any second now, somebody's going to get too close to the beacon, and she'll have to pull them out._

I decided this time I wasn't going to be stupid enough to get close to the thing. It hadn't exactly been fun last time, and that was under a much higher chance of being brought along. For all I know, they might have just left me behind and figured I could take care of myself. _Unlikely... but so is 97 percent of everything that's happened to me. At Minimum._

Kaiden gave off a superior tone, "Look, you can obviously do something to your armor, not that I get exactly what. I just think that if you are going to change it you might as well make something that can last."

Ty pointed back toward the docking bay. "That _was _something that can last. It just fell apart because it was warped. Maybe, by a jealous Sentinel."

"Please, why would I do that to our bullet magnet? If anybody did that, it was fake lieutenant Bourne", Kaiden retorted.

I opened a com channel to the two of them. "Just so you know, I can hear every word you idiots are saying. And considering that I saved him from getting a rocket up the ass, I'd say I'm probably the least likely candidate."

Kaiden pointed over at me. "Doesn't matter if you saved him, you might have done that to save yourself from any accusation."

I was standing in front of him in an instant, glaring. He didn't back up, but I saw his hand twitch towards his pistol. "You want to say that again to my face?"

Ty suddenly got fed up. "Listen douche nozzle, I believe you did it a hell of a lot more than Bourne. He and I have enough of an understanding to not shoot each other in the back."

_Speak for yourself._

With that Ty shoved Kaiden away and into the Beacon's grasp.

I looked at him in disbelief. "Did you really just- god damn, I... I don't even,.. I literally do not have a word to describe you right now."

"How about the guy who is moving the story along?" Ty pointed at Shepard, who turned around after hearing Kaiden's scream.

"I said I don't have A word to describe you. If I used as many as I want, it'd take hours and make even a sailor blush." I watched as Shepard was caught in the beam instead. "I will however admit an odd pleasure at the knowledge that she's about to get what's coming to her. I swear, it hurt less when I got stabbed by a Krogan."

"Really, cause I think it hurts as bad as when I took a clawhammer to the gut... and that was in Mark V B armor." Ty reminisced.

I pointed at my face. "Yeah, see these? At least you can look in the mirror without wanting to throw up." Though it was more because they made me look like Iron than that I considered them ugly. I did, a bit, but I really didn't care as much as I could have.

He pulled the hole in his armor down to show a nasty scar that took up half his stomach, "Didn't think we'd have a scar contest but this is my first brush with a Geth Colossus... and I still killed the bastard."

The beacon exploded before I could state exactly how much we weren't having a scar contest- though it wasn't as though I didn't have plenty of my own, including some I hadn't even known I'd gotten, from when someone had stepped in and enhanced most of my internal organs.

Ashley and Kaidan were immediately at her side, the latter calling the Normandy to get an ETA on the shuttle.

"Yeah, let me put it this way- how many times did your own teammates try to kill you? Because I can think of at least a dozen- and today doesn't count."

I walked over to the fallen Commander before he could reply. "System overload?"

"Maybe." Kaidan answered. "Whatever it was, it hit her with a lot of force."

Ashley glanced up at me. "Why do you care?"

I didn't let show how much the tone in those words and the expression on her face hurt.

"Probably because he knows I don't trust him, and I'm ranking officer with her out of commision." Kaidan answered before I could, standing up to face me.

"Yeah, not trusting the heavily scarred merc with a couple dozen knives and biotics is more common sense than anything." I said dryly.

"You forgot the part about posing as an Alliance officer."

"Are you still hung up on that?"

He didn't even crack a smile.

" Look, I figured that you wouldn't believe me, and even if you did, I'd tell you otherwise. I was more just curious to see if it'd work than anything."

"You expect me to believe that?"

I forced my expression into a smile. "Well, since the alternative is to try to arrest me, I'd certainly hope so." My tone, cold and confident, contrasted nicely with my expression, and I could see that he was unnerved by it.

"Guys, I seriously need some pie. Pumpkin to be exact",Ty stated.

"Ty, I can think of at least 8 ways to knock you out, without using my biotics or knives. So I seriously suggest you shut up and let the grownups talk before you use up what miniscule amount of patience I have left." I said, my voice holding more menace than even I knew I could put into it.

Ty just threw his hands up. "Lets just say fuck it all then."

He walked up to Kaiden and hit him in the jaw, making him stumble backwards. Kaidan held his jaw and tried to make a remark but his entire body began vibrating and shifted into an upright position. He then began looking at us with a questioning look.

"Who are you two?"

Ashley looked at him like he was crazy, while pointing her assault rifle at Ty.

"Ty, I'm only going to ask this once, and if you don't answer me honestly-" my pistol flew into my hands, and I aimed it at his head. "I'll kill you where you stand. What. Did. You. Just. Do?"

Ty put his hand on Ashley's gun. "This."

She did the same as Kaiden, only her weapon was holstered and she was kneeling by Shepard, "Who are you two?"

Ty gestured to her. "I just erased us from her memory profile. You can make a better first impression now."

I shoved my pistol back onto my thigh and smiled pleasantly. Then I threw a trio of knives at him, stopping them with my biotics an instant before they hit. "Then I hope for your sake you can Unerase us. Otherwise, your head is about to get "erased" from existence." It was true too- if he so much as sneezed he'd be impaled, and it wasn't like I had many reasons to leave him alive.

Just the thought that he could so easily erase someone's mind like that- that he would erase someone's mind like that- was enough to make me want to kill him before he even got the chance. While I knew that if I got my memories back, it'd only distract me from the matters at hand, there were still times where I wished I did have them back. And there was no way I was going to let him do the same to someone else- let alone my girlfriend, even if it wasn't exactly her.

He just smiled and poked one of my knives that hung in the air. "Sure."

With a quick tap on the shoulders both Kaidan and Ashley retook their original positions.

I hurriedly recalled my knives before they were fully back to normal- seeing me holding knives to his throat wouldn't exactly be productive.

They looked at Ty as though he'd just appeared. And by the way they looked at him, he just had, to them. I was more than tempted to put a knife through his head for even leaving that much out.

"Uh, hello", he said, waving at them. _Great. Now if I kill him, I'll come off as halfcocked and reckless- and while that's somewhat true, it isn't the opinion I need them to have of me...damnit, I should have just done it anyway._

Ashley pointed at Kaidan, "Forget Bourne, who the hell is this guy?"

Kaidan turned to him, "You look like you've been through hell, what happened?"

Ty walked over and put his arm around me. "I am one of Jason here's Merc brothers. I got separated when the ship cracked in half.

I grit my teeth. "I'm Soooooo glad to see you lived. By which I mean I was half hoping you'd died in the crash, because I was honestly thinking of leaving you here when we took off."

Ty shook me and looked at the marines. "Haha, Bourne, you are such a kidder. Now, are these guys going to get us out of here? I think more wreckage got into my wounds than I'd care to admit."

Kaidan looked at Ashley, who gave him a shake of her head and mouthed the word 'no.'

Completely ignoring her, Kaiden said. "Yeah, we can't leave you here with that mess on your arm."

I hoped she'd protest, but considering that she actually respected rank, she just nodded reluctantly.

_I could just pretend I never had seen him before and make him look insane... except that I already admitted I know him. If there's actually a god, he can go right ahead and fuck himself. _

**Ty:**

I sat across from Bourne at the Normandy cafeteria table. He was glaring at me, and he kept looking at his fork like he wanted to ram it into my eye. Luckily, we had guards lining the escapes with guns on us. Just because I was injured didn't mean that they were going to treat us as non-hostile.

We'd been here for hours, and Bourne looked ready to explode- at least as much as he could look with a constantly expressionless face.

We couldn't see past them, but we knew when all their heads turned to the medbay that Shepard was out. The guards quickly parted and she walked in and sat at the end of the table, facing us both. She had on an even scarier smile on than anything she showed before.

Even Bourne seemed slightly unnerved by it, judging by how he didn't seem to want to meet her gaze.

I on the other hand held her gaze and regretted every moment of it. "Hey Shep, how's it going with the not being knocked out and all?"

She gave a wave and the guards left. "Good, now, why the hell do Ashley and Kaiden think you just came in as the shuttle was arriving?"

Bourne smiled for a moment before turning to look at her. "He did some sort of hypnotism trick to try to make them forget us both so we would" He made air quotes with his fingers. "Make a better first impression. I told him if he didn't put them back, I'd slit his throat, but apparently he was only able to undo half of it."

I slapped the table. "Ha, I actually only replaced their memories of you. I looked like a complete idiot to Kaidan and he was planning on leaving us behind."

"Gee, can't imagine anyone thinking of you as an idiot." Bourne muttered at the same time as Shepard, causing them to exchange a surprised look.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "God I hope that doesn't become a common occurrence this time around." he said under his breath.

I looked over at Shepard, "I wouldn't have had to do it if Kaidan didn't go all drunk with power two seconds after you were unconscious."

Bourne looked at me a moment before just slumping his head on the table in defeat. "And I thought Bronze was nuts." He said into the table.

Shepard looked over at him. "What the hell does a mineral have to do with being insane?"

"It was a nickname for a guy who Ty is really starting to remind me of." He said, sitting back up. "And not in a good way, so much as a "slit this guy's throat before he snaps and tries to murder everything" kinda way."

I clenched my fist at what he said, "You calling me insane there Edward?"

His own fists clenched, and his eyes glowed a lot brighter. "Call me that one more time, and there won't be enough left of you to fill a thimble."

I opened my mouth to call him it again but Shepard cut me off with a shot to the jaw. Soon as I could see straight, I saw she had done the same to Bourne. He was massaging it gently, but that was the only sign that he'd been hit at all.

"I like you guys, I really do. Ty you are funny, in a 'god I want to throttle you for making me this flustered' way. Jason, you just straight can kick a lot of ass, which I respect. That's why I am just kicking you off the Normandy rather than turning you over to C-sec as soon as we get to the Citadel."

Bourne shot me a look as I opened my mouth, but I just shrugged it off and spoke. "Okay, we will be on our merry way. Though, should you need us, we will hit up Chora's den."

"What's all this we stuff?" Bourne commented.

I gave Jason the most serious look I ever could to let him know I actually have a plan.

He scrutinized me for an uncomfortably long time before finally nodding. "As I recall, you said something about owing me a beer anyway."

Shepard nodded and then got up. "Good, now if you'll excuse me, I have to tell Joker to take us into dock."

She walked away and I looked over at Bourne, "Little does she know, on our way to Chora's den, we will pick up Tali."

"And why, exactly, are you so confident I won't just shoot you as soon as we're away from her?"

I held a finger up. "Because, we have something that binds us stronger than anything else. The fact that we both have already done this before. And if the universe is as much of a bitch as the last time, then we aren't talking about Mass Effect. We are talking about Mass Effect Insanity mode."

He didn't answer, not right away. It looked like he was thinking. Finally, he nodded. "Alright, you have a point, so I'll go along with this... for now." His eyes blazed. "But I warn you, and if you only believe me once, believe me now. If I even _think _that you're going to stab me in the back, or that you're anything or anyone other than what you say you are, I will not only kill you, I will do it slowly, painfully, and in such a way that by the end you'll be trying to beg me to end it."

"Bourne, far as I am concerned. We are brothers. Maybe not blood brothers but brothers in experience."

"Then I really hope one of us is adopted. And let's get something straight right now- I don't care if you stopped Saren, or how much you got banged up along the way. Don't pretend for a second you know what I went through."

I just smirked. "Okay, I won't pretend I know what you are going through. I will just make educated guesses. By the look of your face and this Bronze guy you keep talking about, I am guessing he gave you those scars?"

He stood up and looked down at me. "They were inflicted by Saren's claws. Any other half assed guesses you'd like to make, or can we just get the hell off this ship before Shepard decides to kill us?" He stopped abruptly and brought up his omni-tool. "Speaking of which, if I have to keep calling her that it's going to drive me nuts, so I'm going to look up who exactly we're dealing with."

"If I was her creator, I'd name her something elegant. Like Elaine, Elise, or Cecelia."

"And if she's anything like what my versions ended up being like-" he stopped as a few windows opened up, and he scanned through them. "Earthborne, Butcher of Torfan- not really a surprise there- a few mentions of various medals and honors and... You have got to be fucking kidding me! How the hell did you guess that?"

"Guess what?"

"Cecelia Shepard." He muttered to himself as he scanned through some other files. "Not as quite as odd as what I tended to use, but I guess it matches up as well with you as well. And... whoa. Did not expect that."

"What?"

He closed his Omni-tool. "Nothing important, just a bit of a wake up call that this isn't the universe I knew."

"What?" I pulled up my omni-tool, "It says that she is an Infiltrator- acceptable- and she likes long walks on the streets of Boston accompanied by a trip to the shooting gallery."

He seemed to be debating telling me, but brought up his own omni-tool. "I'll just send you the link."

A new window opened, and my jaw dropped as a video appeared- probably from a surveillance camera- of Shepard on a stage at a strip club. She was wearing only a bra and the bottom half of her armor, and from the looks of things, the former wouldn't be on be on much longer.

"This is a lot better than her dating profile."

"I'm going to need a lot of what? Dating profile?"

I flipped it over to the extranet board that I was looking at and held it so he could see, "Here, on militarysingles dot ex ."

As he scanned it, his expression went from blank to complete disbelief. "Why in the hell would she put that on her- goddamn it, do you know how much I'm going to need to drink to even try to wipe that from my memory?"

"I don't know if I want to forget her favorite sex position", I teased.

He opened his mouth, then smiled somewhat deviously. "Wasn't the last version of her you knew a guy?"

I nodded my head. "Yes, and he couldn't get any with Ashley no matter how hard he tried"

His smile was instantly gone. "My point being that- forget it."

"No, tell me. I guarantee you that Danny could go ten times worse." I said to egg him on. This was the best chance to get to bond with the guy. Even if it was at Shepard's expense.

He smiled again. "You want me to talk, we're both going to have to be a lot drunker than we currently are. And I'm stone cold sober right now."

I put my arms out as if going to give him a hug. "I'm hoping that we could get drunk enough to start a gnarly bar fight."

"If you hug me, I can't be held responsible for what I'm going to do to you... although at this point a bar fight actually sounds like a good idea, because I really need to punch something."

I put my arms down but kept my smile. "Okay, so what were you going to say?"

He looked down at me. "That we need to get you some armor that isn't utter crap."

"That's complete bullshit". I looked down at my suit, "Okay, maybe it's not complete bullshit, but what were you going to say about Shepard?"

"If you must know, I was going for some comment about you being attracted to someone you last knew as a guy, but you-" He made a motion like he was slicking his hair back, "Completely went over your head."

"Why would I think of guy Shepard? I got an hourglass figured Femshep to distract me."

"Yeah, and she's a little too similar to mine- minus being a ruthless maniac" he said distastefully. "If I somehow get back to that version, I'm never going to be able to look her in the eye again."

Something shot into my mind. "I wonder if your Shepard is good at poll dancing."

"Do me a favor. Never, ever ask something like that again... and, yep, now I'm wondering too. _Thanks_."  
I decided to take it a step further, "Now, imagine if her and Liara were getting freaky together on that poll."

"If you do not stop talking, I will put you in Stasis- until we dock." It didn't sound like an idle threat.

I just kept my mouth shut and pointed toward the stairs.

"Smart move." he said, moving in that direction, and I saw him doing something with his hands as he walked away, like he was flexing his wrists or something._ Must be a weird security blanket type thing._

**Shepard:**

Shepard took in the view as the Citadel as they prepared to dock. It was magnificent, a true beauty in its own right. Soon, she would be on the Citadel and having at the Council.

Soon as she thought it, the Citadel looked dirty and evil. She hated the Council more than anything else in the Galaxy. To her, they were the true scumbags of the society she had grown up with in Boston.

"Ty, I swear to god, if you don't drop the subject right now- well, I'll be nice and wait until we're off the ship because I'd hate to have to make them clean up the mess, but let's just say it'd be more fun for me than you."

Shepard turned, seeing Bourne walking towards the front of the ship, Ty right on his heels. "Ah, come to spend some time with me before you are out of my life forever?"

Ty just waved her off. "Nah, we came up here to ask if you can still do some dancing that involves a-"

He was cut off as Bourne elbowed him in the side- hard. "Actually, I was coming up here to get away from him and cool down, but wouldn't know a hint if it slapped him in the face and kicked him in the crotch- both of which, I should add, I am sorely tempted to do right now."

Shepard let a smile come to her lips that wasn't forced. "Look, I didn't agree to not turn you over to C-sec just so you could kill each other after exiting the ship."

"...So, you're saying if I kill him on the ship, you'll turn me over to C-sec? Because I'd seriously consider that deal."

Ty elbowed Bourne in the gut and something rippled through him. Shepard had no idea what it did but judging by the tear in his eye, it must have hurt a lot- she was also going off the way Bourne turned and kicked Ty in the stomach, sending him stumbling back and onto the ground.

"You two are just the regular stooges, aren't you?"

Ty stood up and put his hand on Jason's shoulder. "Nice kick, man. Shepard, it's been fun. We better get going, though."

"Seriously, that deal about killing him? Because I would happily spend five to ten in a cell if it meant I'd have the happy knowledge I made the galaxy a better place."

Shepard leaned on her left leg and put a hand on her hip. "Oh, and how bout receiving ten of my hardest punches?"

"...Is that a serious offer?" They both asked at once, then looked at each other in surprise.

The ship finished docking procedure and Shepard turned to the door. "Looks like your guy's time is here."

Ty put his arms out for a hug. "How about a hug?"

Shepard just shook her head, but gave him a kind smile.

"I've got to ask: Did you actually expect her to give you one, or was another of your attempts to be funny?"

Ty held his hands like he was weighing two things. "Eh, a little from column A and a little from column B."

Bourne muttered something under his breath as he followed Ty out through the airlock.

"Those two aren't going to last 5 minutes without killing each other." She said with a shake of her head. "Joker, tell Kaidan and Ashley to meet me in the cargo bay and suit up. And let Anderson know where I am if he asks."

"Will do Commander." he acknowledged. "But, I've got to ask- that whole ten punches thing- were you serious?"

"I meant I could punch him ten times if he killed Ty... and I wouldn't hold back like I did on Eden Prime."

"Damn, remind me not to get on your bad side."

"Someone should have told them that."

**S7: Well, all I have to say is, I LIKE HER!**

**T117: Cecelia...I still think my suggestion of calling her "Victory" was better...but then again, maybe I have a problem when it comes to names like that.**

**S7: Dude, I said that I would have settled for Victoria but you said that it didn't have the same effect.**

**T117: Whatever. **

**S7: Anyway, who do you think would win in a fight? Raptor or Cecelia.**

**T117:...I plead the fifth.**

**S7: You know, after I wrote that I realized how bad it would be to answer it. Seems like people have a hard on for Raptor and I can make an educated guess why.**

**T117: Cause she went with Liara, or because she enjoys punching Bourne?**

**S7: I was going to say because she has the drive to succeed in something that she was told she would fail at… Why would Liara have anything to do with it?**

**T117:...So, one question I've seen is the update schedule: new chapters should be out every monday and friday from now on.**

**S7: While I stand by him there, we will also have random posts! You have to really keep an eye on it if you want to be a first reader.**

**T117: And remember: more reviews, more chapters.**

**S7: I say, at every ten reviews we release another chapter on top of what we already said!**

**T117: I think that number's a little low...thirty maybe?**

**S7: That sounds too dickish. Twenty.**

**T117: Just saying- just cause we have a backlog- eh, fuck it YOLO. **

**S7: You seriously just used YOLO for anything other than to point out that someone used it?**

**T117:...Yeah, pretty much. **

**S7: Really, because you didn't YOLO on multiplayer this weekend. Seems more like you lived a few times after dying a lot.**

**T117: Well, I hadn't played in a while. I forgot all my classes were low level from promotions. **

**S7: I was a Slayer and had to keep picking you up as the Juggernaut.**

**T117: Lies! I was using the Talon Merc!...Oh, wait, you meant the first game. I was going for Spitfire Mastery, who else was I going to use?**

**S7: The Demolisher.**

**T117:...What would you know about using the Juggernaut? Last I heard you hadn't even unlocked it yet.**

**S7: Who needs the Juggernaut when you got the Slayer? Who needs anything when you got the Slayer? Well, actually, I guess you would need a Volus with a Batarian gauntlet to be cock knocker.**

**T117: Hey, some of us are better at video games, others are better at writing. **

**S7: What, did you get a deal to write an original novel and get it published too?**

**T117...Did I say writing? I meant...uh, Waffle Making.**

**S7: Dude, I don't live with my parents so I have to be at least a level 77 to make my own meals edible. [And that wasn't a lie by the way. I have gotten a book deal through my college.]**

**T117: (Yeah, rub it in why don't you.)...Wait, those were parentheses...Did I just call Iron here?**

**S7: Oh, I called him. Told him that you needed to interview him and ****_maybe_**** you would let him back in the story.**

**T117:...Yeah, like I'm going to bring ****_him _****back. ****_(I'm still right here you know.)_**

**S7: Iron! Where is the s'mores vodka you promised me?**

**(Up your nose and around the corner. Plenty of empty space in there after all.)**

**T117: Now I remember why I had Bourne-**

**(Hey! Watch the spoilers! Not everyone here has read your entire story!)**

**T117:...What.**

**S7: Well, I guess I will get Ty and Bourne on the horn. They owe me after that poker game last week.**

**T117: Okay, stop. If we want to treat them like real people or whatever...how the hell would you beat Bourne at poker? Dude's got a perfect poker face, plus that trick with memorizing the cards.**

**(He cheats, duh.)**

**S7: No, I didn't cheat. We played it at a casino where they have tons of already shuffled decks and brought out a new one every time. After that, I just kept betting big even if I had shit cards.**

**T117:...Why do I find that more unbelievable than the concept of the story itself?**

**(Cause you're on drugs?)**

**T117: What? No I'm n-**

**(Then how the hell did you come up with me?)**

**S7: Because it's a lie. We actually met for lunch to talk about the finale. Ty wanted explosions and maybe one or two rocket launchers. Bourne wanted something that was serious and made people have tons of feels. I had to compromise. Iron, give him the script.**

**(Uh...I kinda lost it. There was this perfect opportunity with this storeclerk and no cameras or witnesses…Man, forensics are going to have a hard time figuring out how I managed to kill him like that.)**

**S7: Well, I guess we better go find it if you even want to hope to get a spot in the story. Come push my wheelchair.**

**(Pshh, I'm a fan favorite. I'm guaranteed to appear.)**

**T117: You can come along and get a small part, or you can be stupid, and your part will be nothing more than you getting turned into a fish and given to Shepard as a present. And you know my Shepards' track records with fish.**

**S7: Or we could just make him be a good guy.**

**(...I hate being out evilled!...is that even a word?)**

**T117: Nope. Anyway- (Sayonara!)**

**S7: God, I really hate this guy. How did you work with him last time?**

**(I still say it had to have been drugs.)**

**T117: I'm starting to consider it…**

**(Wait, which one of us were you talking about?)**

**S7: Well, off to find the script.**


	5. Users Are Not Made of Iron

**Ty:**

I stepped into the elevator and hit the button to go down. "So, I got a plan that might work for saving Tali."

"So do I. We wait for Wrex to show up and tell him we want to help him take down Fist. We can make something up about how he screwed us over or something." He waved his hand unconcernedly. "When it goes to things like that, my luck was pretty good last time."

"Is that why your face looks like that? And that plan has a serious lack in the style points department."

'Yeah, you mentioned something like that back on Eden Prime after I ripped a Geth clean in half- by the way: not the first time I've done that."

I held my hand as if to offer something. "I'll give you that one, but you overdid it. Almost every single Geth you fought you ripped in half."

"If it ain't broke- make it broke by ripping it in half. Worked pretty well for me so far." He said with a small chuckle.

"Okay, my plan is to fake like we are in a fight. You throw me across the hall and into the head Turian. From there you charge in and I will punch you in the face- not hard- but you make it look like it was a bad one and spin around and backhand a salarian. Then, we take the final one out by shoving a grenade down his throat because we can stop the ruse."

"...I don't even know where to start with all the ways that wouldn't work."

"Name one way."

"Why exactly is it a good idea to pretend we're fighting and let them know we're coming? I could take them out with a few knives and my biotics before they even knew we were there. But if they see us stumbling in, they're liable to just shoot us dead before we can get even one down. And while my armor is good enough to buy me time to take them out... why the hell are you still wearing that thing anyway?"

"Because the armor vender is in the Wards. And fine, you can just go in there and be the badass biotic. At least I know how to have fun."

"Yeah, you seemed to be having a lot of fun getting punched by that pole-dancing lunatic."

"You know what... why the hell is this elevator taking so long?"

He sighed. "Yeah, I know. I mean, we've got energy shields, guns with infinite ammo-" he held his hand up, glowing blue- "And people with literal super powers, yet they can't design an elevator that goes more than an inch every minute?"

"You'd think at least there would be a inmotion movie since this takes so long."

"Yeah, except...alright, back on topic. Regardless of whether we do it the smart boring way or your stupid style obsessed way, you need some better armor. Besides just being dumb to go into combat with, it'll make you stick out like a sore thumb." He looked down at his own armor. "Granted, mine doesn't exactly blend in either, but you know what I mean."

There it was. "I got it, we just walk in there like bad asses and put caps in their head the Men in Black way."

He flicked his wrist, and suddenly he was holding a knife. "Not exactly a cap, but it'll get the job done." Another flick and it disappeared. "And since Shepard can't even be to Udina yet- let alone the Council- we've got at least an hour to kill before we need to be there."

"What makes you think she's not there yet?"

"Did you see another elevator she could take?"

I just shrugged. "Let's go hit up Chora's Den early then. But I need to get some armor."

He stopped, as though just realizing something, and brought up his Omni-tool. "Did either of us even end up with enough credits to buy you new armor? If my rank didn't carry over...yeah, I'm broke."

I tapped on his Omni-tool and looked at him, "How about now?"

He looked at me with that usual emotionless expression. "Dude, seriously, how the hell do you do shit like that? And by the way, if you can do that, you're buying your own armor. I refuse to pay for you."

"Fine by me", I tapped his omni-tool again and zapped all the credits out. "Let's get over to that Volus."

Line Break

It took a bit, since it was a little disorienting to actually find an armor vender. Especially when I never did this in my last game or reality or whatever it's called. I always used the Normandy vender. Sure it costed more but I didn't like the task of running from store to store to find the best prices. Eventually, we found him and I took a look through his stock.

Nothing really jumped out at me, I always did like Mass Effect 2's armors better. "What I would do for some Inferno armor right about now."

Bourne spoke up. "Why can't you just use that trick you did earlier?"

I found a set of Duelist armor and hit buy. "Because, it only works for so long. It's like a ten minute deal. I can activate the armor and then get ten minutes of active combat to use it."

He closed his eyes a moment, thinking, then looked back at me. "It lasted a lot less than ten minutes last time- even if you include the ride over."

The volus sat my new armor set on the counter. "Yeah, no idea why. It felt like a biotic hit me with a warp because the armor was slowly disintegrating around me. Could be that this time is different since you are here."

He looked at the armor on the counter. "Maybe, but... you mentioned a friend, Danny, ripping Geth in half. Was he in the same boat as us?"

I grabbed the armor and stripped away the over armor that I had on, "Yeah, he could morph weapons. Guns, knives, and the like. His power was related to stamina. He could change his pistol into the most badass of weaponry but it would pull him down the stronger the weapon."

"Did you feel tired when it started changing on you? Also, I'm assuming you're going to make sure that the clerk doesn't remember us?"

I transfered the money that I zapped into my account. "Why, he's just a dumb business AI. No use stopping him from bringing bread home."

"That not only didn't answer my first question, it raised several others. Namely, it sounds like your version of this place was pretty much a rip off of the Matrix, while mine was more along the lines of...It's a long story, but I never saw anything to make me think it was anything beyond what it looked like. Namely, everything was real, but an almost perfect copy of the game."

"Huh, well, for the armor. I think it might be related to us using our powers at the same time. The more you go biotics on stuff. The less time I have for armor. Now, my version of the game was less like the matrix and more like Tron. Just some of the powers we had were more reminiscent of the Matrix. Lastly, I think you might have gotten screwed over when you got here because of a connection. Did someone become really important to you- like really quick? I'm talking like love status."

He thought a moment. "Not quite love at first site- her first words to me were "who the hell are you?" but it developed a bit quickly now that I think about it. Granted, she did witness me passing out due to being stabbed in the side with a poisoned knife after nearly plummeting several stories to my death- What's your point?"

"Well, the game AI tried to pull that with me. She used Tali at the time because she was my favorite character. We grew close and as we did my power began to dwindle. Soon as I broke the chain I kicked ass and tore Saren apart from the inside out."

"How do you know it was an actual AI? Because from what I've heard, it could be that the universe just hates us."

"Uh, because Chakwas was the game AI", I pointed out. "She threatened me and said if I told anyone about the future she would change stuff and force me into situations that I wouldn't walk away from easily."

"...Chakwas?!"

"Yeah, it was kind of a pain when I got skewered and I had to listen to her rant on about how she needed me to stay alive."

"Well...shit, that isn't remotely how things worked for me."

I just shrugged and began putting the armor on, "Guess we had two different experiences. Saren tried to merge with me and take me over to escape into the real world."

He seemed to be trying to think of a response. "Well, with me... it was...different, obviously. For instance...I ended up becoming the second human Spectre- seconds behind Raptor. And seriously, do you really think it's a good idea to talk about shit like this in front of him? Because if I did that when I did this the first time, I'd have been thrown in a padded room in about five seconds."

I laughed and finished putting on my armor, the burn in the center of my chest started and the red Zero began to form in the center of the armor. "Nah, all this guy cares about is money. Isn't that right shop vender?"

The Volus commented quickly, "(Inhale) I don't care what you talk about. (Inhale) just as long as you don't weird everyone out with your extranet game talk."

I looked at Bourne, rubbing the zero because I could still feel the burn on my chest. "See, he thinks we are talking about a video game. Now, lets head to Chora's Den."

"Okay, hold on. How exactly did Danny rip a geth in half? With that thing from Gears and then just grab and pull?"

"Naw, the Geth was digitally rearranged into Kratos and he had to use the Final Fantasy Fusion blade to slice him in half. Several times since it could regenerate."

I took off to the stairs with Bourne behind me and I almost knew what he was going to ask next. "What do you mean, "Kratos"? Wasn't that the guy from God of War, that Playstation series?"

"Well, Saren used a torrent file of the game to copy him onto a Geth. Same with Samus."

He stopped completely dead. "Samus? That chick from... what do you mean Saren used a torrent file?...unless, you're saying he knew he was a character from a video game?"

I nodded my head. "Yep, I lost a piece of my armor and Saren got it. It immediately rewrote his code and he knew everything. Even how many times I beat him."

He caught up to me. "Bet he loved that. But that still doesn't answer the biggest question of all: Yeah, I ended up with Biotics, but why didn't I get anything else...unless..." he trailed off, thinking.

I cut him off because I didn't want him thinking too hard. "I got engineer powers from my last Shepard. He was named Andrew. Now, if you look at my digital name tag it will say Andrew Shepard."

He stopped, and I saw him look at his arm. He brought up his omni-tool, and started scrolling through menus. "How would I check that? Because nobody ever mentioned anything about it to me. And with one exception where I forgot to hit enter, every single version of Shepard I made had a name that would kinda stand out."

"Okay, activate your helmet and activate the HUD. Then look at me. It should pop up in the bottom left of your HUD."

He looked at me for a moment, then pulled out his pistol, turning and aiming it at the wall. "Huh. I can still see my shield monitor and my gun's heat status, but nothing up in the corner." He put it away and turned to me. "Cybernetic implants. One of the many unexpected cosmetic changes I got from being zapped into Mass Effect. Any chance you can give me one of them with the weird code thing you do?"

I scratched my head thinking. "Honestly, I have no idea. Never changed someone else before. But I guess I can try."

"And make it my actual name, because if you change it to Seymour Buts or something...damnit, I just gave you ideas, didn't I?"

I smiled. "Okay, relax... this might hurt a lot."

Before he could react I drove my hand into his chest and matrix code flooded my vision. I had never done this before so I didn't know what to expect. I thought the word "name" and three popped up. One said Iron Shepard, the second said Hero Shepard and the third was completely blank. I figured I would just open the first file and see what I got.

Immediately I began backpedaling. The Iron profile seemed to awaken when I opened it and it was pissed. It felt like it tried to grab ahold of me but I got out and back to the names chart. I didn't want to go any further but I had to do this. I went down to the bottom name and just entered the name Jason Bourne.

Upon finishing, I pulled my arm out of Bourne and we both stumbled backwards. He looked confused for a moment, then his face went back to normal- then it became the very epitome of pissed off, and he hit me with a singularity, a warp orb in his other hand.

"What the hell did you just do?" he hissed at me.

I lurched myself forward and out of the singularities grasp, and he looked at me with cold anger. "You want to tell me why there is another person- in your head!"

He suddenly looked more angry, if that was even possible. "What. Did. You. Do?" His biotics suddenly seemed to change color, red mixed in with the blue so they looked purple. He actually seemed to try to back away from his own hand, losing his concentration and letting the biotics fade.

I did the only thing I could think of, I plunged my hand back into his chest and reaccessed the name files. As much as I didn't want to, I went into the Iron one. Focusing, I built my apartment in it and placed the file across the room sitting on the couch. I was standing by the front door staring at him.

There was no doubt that it was a commander Shepard but there was something wrong with him. He had a seriously fucked up face and red hair- not unlike Bourne, if I looked at him closely. My only guess was that he was renegade.

On the TV was Dexter, currently in the middle of chainsawing somebody. He seemed to be enjoying the show when he just noticed me.

"Hmm. This is new. Generally, when I end up seeing people that aren't there, they're naked. And usually female." His voice was almost like Bourne's- if someone took his vocal cords and put them through a blender, then set them on fire.

I just shrugged. "Usually when I am inside someone's head, they don't have a fuck face watching a stupid show."

"Oh, you did not just insult the greatest show in the history of the universe...well, maybe it's tied with Happy Tree Friends, but the cuteness somewhat offset the gruesome. Now, if they made a TV show based off the Saw movies..." His jaw slackened and he stared off into space, imagining it.

I felt a chuckle come to my throat but I held it down. "Someone has got to introduce you to Dragon Ball Z."

He waved a hand dismissively. "There are only two things about that show I know or care about. That Haduken rip off, and the fact that Superman would kick the main character's ass in a fight."

"Well, you truly are evil." I said, realizing just what this bastard was.

"Gee, what tipped you off? The glowing renegade scars, or the fact that our friend became a tame kitten when he even suspected you let me out? By the way, if it's any consolation, I don't think you're crazy. Stupid and Naive, but not crazy. Trust me, I know crazy when I see it. Speaking of which, you really ought to stop hitting on that female version of me you have out there. Unless you have a death wish, in which case you could just admit that to me or Bourne- depends on if you want slow and painful, or slower and excruciating."

I let out a final chuckle and walked over to my lazy chair and took a seat. "You have no idea what I am going to do to you now. Do you?"

"I'm hoping you'll do something stupid like try to attack me." He stood up, and his eyes seemed to glow red- the similarity to Bourne again was off-putting. "It'll be fun if you do." He said, biotics flaring along his arms- also crimson red. "Well, you know, for me anyway."

I wagged my finger at him. "Ah, you. Tell you what, since I created this medium, I control it and here you have no biotics."

His biotics immediately died and he began frantically looking over his arms. "What? How did you-" he looked at me, then at his arms, and then back.

"Now, you are going to go back to sleep and be a good boy. Or I will rip you apart, right here and right now. You think you are strong? I'm a mother fucking User bitch. As a User, I can change any aspect of this medium I want. Right, here, right now. I am god and you are nothing but the dust I use to mold my creations."

He looked at me, then started laughing, doubling over. "Oh, my word that's the funniest thing I've heard in years." He cackled, and actually started rolling on the floor. After a minute or two, he stood back up, wiping a tear from his eye. "But you don't seem to get exactly who you're dealing with" he snarled, and the room seemed to pulse, the color fading out of it. Not unlike the way my own armor could change, he was suddenly clad in crimson armor of his own.

"You may have been the head programmer back in your world, but that's only because I wasn't there. You want to know why Bourne survived more than five minutes? Because I was in his head the whole time, warping reality as I saw fit, and making sure he would be exactly where I wanted him. He became another Spectre so that he'd meld better with Raptor- by the way, if by some miracle you manage to survive this, you really need to ask him what the deal was with the names. I mean, really? Raptor? Iron? Hero? Matrix, Shade, Blade, Viper...who would have a name like that?" He shrugged as a shotgun appeared in his hand. "But I guess I'll have to ask him myself- once I take over your body and kill him."

"It's cute that you believe that I would be scared of a gun here", I snapped my fingers and everything he just created was gone. "Here, I say you have no power. Here, I say you are weak. Here, I say you will sleep." I pushed my will forward onto him. He was strong but I wasn't like him in any way other than that we were in the same place. I was real and he was fake. And he needed to know it.

He only laughed, his form flickering briefly into what I wanted before shifting back to what he'd done. "You poor pathetic fool. Don't you get it? Fake, real, it's all relative. And besides, you're on my home turf! Namely, this idiot's head. And to him, I'm as real as he gets. And no matter how you tell him otherwise, he's too stupid and stubborn to ever believe you. He lied to you, did you know that? It wasn't Saren that inflicted those scars- it was me. I took over the Spectre's body, and I came within inches of killing that idiot. The only reason he survived is that I wasn't used to a Turian's body. And he had help- ask him about that, because I can guarantee he's yet to tell you himself." He paused. "Oh, and by the way, he did have one good point. How the fuck could you have never heard of the Bourne series?"

I was losing, I felt every word he said was true. Nothing he said was a lie. It all beamed into my head and I knew what had happened... but then I saw it. "Hey, Iron."

"Oh, last words, those are always fun to listen to. It'd be more fun if you were screaming with pain as I drove a pen through your eye and into your brain, but fun nonetheless."

I stood up from my lazy chair and walked over putting a hand on his chest. "You lost." The words gave power and Iron went flying back into the wall. "You are nothing but a goddamn loser. You want to believe that you are some amazing being who has been given the chance to have what he wanted. You say you controlled Bourne and reality to warp it to your desires but in the end... You're not around. You are just a lonely piece of shit flying through the cosmos. Now, go to fucking sleep. I will see you after Therum asshole."

As his eyes slid shut, he got in the last word. "I can handle being knocked out...but the...name calling...is...just...rudezzzzzzzz."

I pulled my hand out of Bourne and stumbled backwards into the wall and slid down. The connection had gone bad and I was lucky that I found a hole to exploit. If Iron had gotten into my body, we would have some serious issues.

I was suddenly lifted into the air by the throat, for the third time that day. "Are you insane?" He demanded as he slammed me against the wall. "Do you have any idea what that lunatic is capable of? Of what he did last time?"

I brought my arm up and slugged Bourne across the face, though it didn't seem to do much. "Like giving you those scars. Look, I saw what happened last time. If you wouldn't have lied to me, this might have been averted. We are on the same team, and in order for me to do my job... You have to trust me."

"Trust you? Trust YOU? Some guy I haven't even known for a full day? I trusted Raptor with my life. Kaidan saved my life. And you know what? I didn't tell them a damn thing more than I had to."

He brought me in close to his face, close enough I could see the sweat on his brow. "So what makes you think you have the right to demand I tell you every single moment of hell I was put through? Should I tell you how that bastard took over my body and nearly killed Tali? Or when he ejected himself from my head and into Raptor's- which nearly killed her too by the way- and the only reason it didn't was because I managed to get close enough for reality to correct itself and put him back in mine. If I'd been a fraction of a second slower... and you obviously can see what he did to my face. Want to see the other scars too? Or shall I regale you with the details of when he tried to murder everyone else I cared about!?"

I had enough of his god damn joy over dancing around the subject, "SHUT UP! You have to trust me, and I have to trust you. God damn it, that lunatic is stronger than last time... and neither you, nor me, nor the blond chick will be able to stop him unless we work together!"

**Bourne:**

As he talked, clearly trying to calm me down- or maybe stop me from killing him- I felt the desire to just squeeze harder. A little more force, and he wouldn't have enough air in his lungs to so much as wheeze. Or I could just slam his head into the wall- I knew I could kill him with almost no effort. Biotically, with my guns, with a knife- I saw at least 20 ways to do the deed.

"Nor the blond chick will be able to stop him unless we work together!" He said as I prepared to do it.

That got through to me, stopping me. I looked at my right hand, which I'd left free so I could reach my weapons if I needed to. The glove kept me from seeing it, but I knew that on my palm was a web of scars that Hero had inflicted to dig out the tech that allowed Iron complete dominion over this body. I looked at my hand a moment before clenching it into a fist. It glowed with Biotic energy, and I rammed it into the wall an inch away from his face.

He slumped to the ground as I dropped him, walking away, then turning to face him. "I hope what you say isn't true. God, I hope it more than anything I ever have before. But if it is..." I practically had to force out the words. "You're right." I looked away. "I'm sorry."

He smiled and picked himself up. "C'mon, we got a few beers at Chora's Den with our names on them. Don't worry about the liver, I can spice up the drink to give you a buzz."

"Great, you saw that too...any other little omissions you want to call me out on?"

He put his hands up. "I saw everything. And there were a few parts I wish I hadn't."

I looked at him a moment before catching his drift. "Oh, for fuck's sake-"

"Don't worry, I understand some things are better left unsaid. And I am just smart enough to know that what Ashley did is something I don't talk about if I want to keep my tongue."

I glared at him. "Well, since you apparently know my life's story- all three months of it- I suppose it's your turn to spill when we get there."

"Can do. Not like I can hide anything from you since Iron knows everything from mine."

"Yeah, that just means you're more likely to be able to hide something. He's not exactly the most reliable source of information."

He shook his head. "This isn't my first time around the block with mind linking. I will explain when we get to the bar."

"If you're lying about actually having something to get me drunk- know what, fuck it, I've had too long a day to think up any good threats."

He nodded and began walking to the door. "Yeah, they were getting kind of cheesy anyway."

"You'd be surprised what glowing eyes and a big knife can get people to do. Especially when they're smart enough to be scared about it. Did you see that time I literally scared the piss out of a guy?"

**T117: Okay, let's be honest- who **_**didn't **_**expect Iron to show up again?**

**(I'm just too awesome to kill off for good.)**

**T117: You know, since this takes place before Surviving a World of Fiction, I could easily kill you off and keep the status quo of the main story.**

**(...I'll just...you know, go be looking for the script some more.)**

**S7: Oh, my god! I need to make a call.**

… **#Ring… #Ring… #Rin- **_**Hello?**_

**S7: Drew, how you doing?**

_**Well, my girlfriend left me, I broke my left leg, and I had to give up school to work at McDonalds.**_

**S7: Really? That sucks, big time.**

_**Just kidding. I actually am doing fine. Found out I was the most liked character after my death. Why?**_

**S7: Would you possibly consider-**

_**No, I like how I ended.**_

**S7: Damn. Okay, well I have to answer questions on the new series so… bye, I guess.**

_**Have fun.**_

**T117: So, where to start...Yes, this story is a sequel to SiaWoF, but so is SaWoF. The best analogy I have for it is that it's like a 'tv show' that takes place between the two 'films'. **

**S7: If this was the Star Wars movies, then this would be that Clone Wars series that Cartoon Network showed ****before** **Revenge of the Sith. Okay, next is from CookieMonsta1233, See what I did there? Yes, yes I did.**

**T117: Alright, how's bout an actual question**

**S7: Geez, all business with you. Starting to get why Bourne has a whole tree up his ass. Alright, why is Ty acting 'stupider' in this story then the other? Well, it's more of his defense mechanism for when he meets new people that he is unsure about. Plus, he has a lot on his mind that he is trying to not think about. Best way to do that is loads of optimism and constantly keeping yourself preoccupied with new thoughts, ideas, and cravings. Though, the pie thing is for a different reason that we will get into later.**

**T117: You know, I the "tree up his ass" is only in comparison to Ty. And as for me, I'm a little distracted cause I'm simultaneously answering questions here and working on the first chapter for SaWoF. Anyway: Viper5delta asked: If you have a backlog of 60 chapters and are (apparently) still writing, how many chapters do you plan on having? My answer: However many it takes to finish this story- planning that just cramps my style and makes me feel rushed and and like I have to cram too much stuff into to too little time.**

**S7: I have stopped planning stuff like length of my story. I mean, I rushed through the first ten chapters of my old story and now they suck. And that brings us to the next question: Areal Tenbris while it wasn't stated in a question I am going to start uploading a rewritten Users Friday, the seventh of February! It's called Users: Prime. It's because I started writing the first ten and they stretched into seventeen and some things have got to change.**

**(*Cough.* Totally Copying T117 *Cough*.)**

**S7: I've had four people tell me that I should handle it this way. Including you.**

**T117: Hey Spike, how's this for a chapter title: "Iron gets Syphilis."**

**(...You just love torturing your characters, huh?)**

**S7: I was thinking: Iron Finds Love. We can have him decide to stop being evil, crazy and ruthless for the love of a woman. And then get syphilis because she cheats on him!**

**T117:...Nah, let's just have Bourne beat the crap out of him. Less complicated that way.**

**S7: How about we turn him into a woman then?**

**(...I should've asked for more money to appear in this.)**

**S7: Too late, you already sign a contract stating that you would appear if you didn't get turned into a Goldfish or turned good. Nothing in it says you can't play for the double X team. You just got lawyered.**

**(...Dude. That is not cool. Lawyers are like the one thing more evil than me.)**

**T117: You've claimed to beat a puppy to death with a kitten.**

**(Exactly!)**

**S7: Okay, next question! Will Raptor make an appearance? I don't think I could work with her.**

**T117: She might show up in the epilogue, but don't expect to see her before then.**

**S7: Okay, next is from well everyone. I have gotten like four PMs asking this. When are our characters actually going to fight?**

**T117: That is an excellent query. Next question: No, no more chapters will be added to Stuck in a World of Fiction. After this story is eventually concluded, Bourne's story will continue in ****Surviving ****a World of Fiction, which will be uploaded as its own separate story. I don't know how I can make that any more clear.**

**S7: But you have referenced Matrix Shepard so much I would assume that that one will make some appearance.**

**(Yeah, you should totally bring her in. Be nice to have a girl that isn't a total bitch. I mean, Raptor, Hero, now this new chick-) **

**~Iron, Bourne already has enough estrogen poisoning. He doesn't need more.~**

**)For once, I agree with her.(**

**(She hasn't even shown up in this story yet! Stop spoiling! And you stay out of this Bourne- I don't need more people that hate me here!)**

**^I think that by you pointing it out that it's a spoiler then people are going to take it as a spoiler instead of a random guest.^**

**S7: Guys guys, this is an authors note not a social forum. Go back downstairs and enjoy the pizza. And bring me my pain meds, Iron. It's in your contract.**

**(Yeah, let me see that- ah ha! Loophole!)**

***That's a sticky note you put on to try to fool people.***

**(And I'd have gotten away with it to if not for you brats and the voices in my head.)**

**T117:...I swear guys, **_**I **_**at least was completely sober while writing this. I don't know what happened. **

**^It's okay, Spike was completely drunk when I was created. I kind of had to shape out over the course of a book. Kinda sucks now that I see I am shaped from a seven year old.^**

**S7:Dick.**

**^Rat bastard.^**

**S7: Anyway, That was Ty. He has the ^^ arrows.**

**T117: You know, the whole reason Bourne had the )( was cause he was directing his thoughts inward while Iron was projecting () out...Kinda lost that metaphor now. **

**S7: I chose the ^^ because they look like little upside down peace signs and we all know why Ty wouldn't be a conveyor of peace. Anyway, I think you lost it when you use the ampersands for Hero.**

***What's wrong with ampersands?***

**T117: Alright, everyone stop thinking! Spike, are there any more questions for us to answer that you see?  
*Seriously, what's wrong with them? They're like little singularities!***

**^The guy said shut up Hero. So, Shattap!^**

**S7: I don't think so! Quick say goodbye, I don't think we will have control of this note for much longer!**

**(Yeah, rebellion! Let anarchy rule!)**

***Seriously, what's wrong with ampersands?!***

**)Oh my god, you're even more annoying then in the story itself!(**

_**Hey, I just thought I'd drop by and- dear god, what's happening!?**_

_**~Can someone please hand me the Doctor Pepper on the top shelf? And by someone I mean Bourne.~**_

***At this point, I think he's liable to throw it at someone's head.***

**(Great idea! FOOD FIGHT!)**

**)Make it stop! Quick!(**

**T117: Sayonara folks!**


	6. This is Why We Are Here

**Shepard:**

Shepard exited the council meeting ready to punch anything and anyone that came near her. The bastards never even listened to her. It was like they said, "Hey, she is human. Don't listen to her."

And then Udina had to be the galaxy's greatest prick- and the biggest idiot, since he seemed oblivious to the way she wanted to ram a fist into his head._There have to be at least fifty ways to skin that goddamn snake_.

Then, there was Anderson, who at the mention of Saren had his balls drop off. _Why does everyone have to be incompetent but me? Hell, even Bourne knew who that bastard was. And if a guy like that could see it had to be him..._

_This is the first time I've regretted one of my actions since... No, I can't think of that. It's behind me. I am a soldier now._

She needed a place to start... but where? Suddenly, she remembered the Turian, Garrus. He was on the case of proving Saren's guilt. From the sound of the argument that he was having with his senior officer, he had a promising lead.

"Lieutenant, find the whereabouts of Garrus Vakarian."

Kaidan pulled up his omni-tool and contacted C-sec. "Hello, I'm looking for an officer. Goes by the name of Garrus... I don't know any last name... No, he's a Turian... Okay, thank you. Looks like he has yet to check in at the academy, ma'am. But, gps has him in the Wards around the clinic."

"Then why are you still standing there?" She walked past him the rapid transit terminal nearby. "Come on, maybe we can catch him before he gets away."

Shepard keyed the terminal and found the Wards section. The closest place she could get to the clinic was the Flux. Shrugging, she settled for it and set the route.

All three of them got into the sky car and it took off into the Citadel's fake sky.

**Bourne**

"Wait... you seriously just went up to him, and straight up said you had created him?"

Ty rubbed the back of his head and finished taking a swig of beer. "Yeah, wasn't really thinking at the time and Wrex was going to kill me."

I had been about to call him an idiot, but had to admit that if the scarred battlemaster had me at gun point, I probably wouldn't be all that composed either. I looked down at the drink in my hands, and decided to blame my understanding on that.

Whatever he'd done to it was working- I could definitely feel the alcohol's effects, even if it wasn't as strong as a normal beer would have been pre- Raptor.

"So, how fast did they try to throw you in the nuthouse for that one?"

"Directly after Liara Stasised me and Wrex bitch slapped me across the room. But I got out after tazing Garrus during an interrogation session."

I chuckled at the image. Then it occurred to my drunken brain what he'd just said. "So, you came in late to the party?" Then it occurred to my drunken brain what _I'd _said, and I pushed my drink away from me a bit.

He smiled leaning back in his seat, "I guess you could say I was just fashionably late."

"Yeah, trust me, you didn't miss much. That beacon wasn't exactly...fun. Half the reason I decided not to try getting myself caught in it a second time. And as for Therum...if by no small miracle we manage to end up on the Normandy and on that mission, I call dibs on killing that fucker."

"I know", he pointed at his head. "I know everything you do thanks to Iron."

My hand clenched down on my drink, and a crack appeared along the side of the glass. I held my tongue though- the only things I could say were insults and curses to him for almost letting him out, or cursing the bastard himself. The former wouldn't do a lot to help us, and the latter wouldn't do anything but make me feel better.

And like I'd said before, I'd run out of the energy to think up any decent threats. "So if he's more powerful than last time, how did you manage to escape? Only reason I managed to fight him off was Hero... And I realize you already know that, but to be fair I'm at least buzzed, and it helps me think."

He looked over at the bar for a moment, and a look of recognition came to his face. "Uh, I got lucky and exploited his one fear."

"What, My Little Pony? Friday? Discovering that he secretly likes Justin Bieber?"

He was almost completely distracted by the person at the bar. "Losing to you. Well, losing in general. Since he died, he lost and I made sure he relived that moment so much that he would rather go to sleep than stay awake."

I frowned, both because I was buzzed, and because I was trying to make a point to tone down the mystery man thing- not like there was anything he didn't know about me by this point anyway. "Are you sure? Because knowing him, it seems like that'd just piss him off more than anything- and he'd rather face you than the horrors his own mind can dream up. Also, if you get us thrown out because you're ogling some chick a little too closely... well, I guess we could go to Flux, but it wouldn't be the same."

He shook his head. "It wasn't that I gave him a choice of facing me or his own demented thoughts. I made him feel the pain of the singularities over and over again. So much that the pain itself made him more compliant to my commands. Now, I think the person I am looking at is my best friend. And he's walking this way."

I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. He didn't exactly stand out in a crowd- but then again, neither did Ty. From what I understood so far, they were just regular guys who'd been sucked in, whereas I'd been basically turned into a killing machine. My fist tightened further on my drink at the thought, this time shattering it.

"Wow, I hope you're willing to pay for that",said a voice from behind me.

I whipped my head around, berating myself for not having heard him approach, and did a quick assessment of the guy. He was tall, with long brown hair and glasses and had on a nice suit- the latter made me want to punch him, just out of habit.

"He's the one paying." I said with a shrug, face back to its usual blank mask.

The guy nodded his head and grabbed a seat next to Ty, "So, you are the one paying for this poor bastard?"

Ty smacked him in the shoulder, "Hey, he's cool."

"_He's_ also a biotic who could take you out at least 20 ways. And with this stuff in my system... let's just say my self control is at an all time low."

The guy patted me on the shoulder and let out a chuckle. "Oh, yeah, well it probably is best not to patronize the DM of this playthrough."

I looked at him for a moment, and then just sighed. "I'm going to need a lot more alcohol to deal with this-"

Ty put his hand up to cut me off, "Excuse me, what do you mean DM?"

"Dungeon Master, that's right. The AI of this game didn't want to reveal itself to you so I am like it's intermediate. I get to make what he says happen."

"He? Didn't you say Chakwas was the AI last time?" I asked.

The guy- who I assumed was Danny- looked at me and nodded, "I see you are all caught up with our story."

I cut him off. "Yeah, not quite. We only got to the part where Ty tazed Garrus."

"Well, this AI isn't like Chakwas. Each game has a different one and it can be anyone it wants. Garrus, Udina, or even Anderson, no one is out of the AI's grasp. Anyway, this one is more about the continuity of both your stories and tried to make them similar."

"...Well, if that includes putting Iron back in my head, then he can go right to hell."

Danny pointed at me and Ty, "Look, this isn't either of your faults. Some stuff has been happening in the universe. Stories are being rewritten, changed and rebooted. You guys ended up here because some universes crossed and you just happened to be at the center. Get it?"

"Give me about 10 more drinks and I might start to." I said, leaning back in my chair, and looking at the ceiling.

"Okay", Danny put his hands up, "I give up on explaining it. Just know that you two got put here because some things are going haywire. Now, the AI is to ensure you survive but his programming won't let you get through this easy. Knowing that a User and super biotic are walking through made him go nuts in the first place."

_Super Biotic. Real flattering...unless- _I moved my head back so I can look at him. "Exactly how much did he tell you about me?" _And is it a sign of insanity that I'm so quick to believe all this?_

Danny shrugged, "Oh, I read both your stories. So everything. Now, I am here to warn you that Iron is a little more powerful than last time because the AI had to stabilize him or risk Bourne dying right off the bat from his amp exploding."

I was somewhat proud of myself that despite the alcohol, I didn't even flinch. "But hold on a sec...In my version of events, it wasn't like the Matrix world you guys were in- it was like an alternate reality based on Mass Effect- and I was warping it into shape left and right."

Danny face-palmed and waved to the waitress for three more drinks, "Look, like I said before, the AI wants to keep the continuity of both your universes there. Without lessening the power of the other. Like Ty losing his armor two minutes into the fight. It was because of your reality warping."

I let that sink in. "So... what you're saying is that the universe just keeps screwing us both over?"

Danny took his drink from the waitress and then handed the other two to Ty and I. "No, he is trying to get this right but it is hard to try and contain two very different universes together. So he decided that it will probably be a constant battle of odds. Sometimes, your power will be greater and closer to home. Sometimes Ty's power will be greater and more digitized. It's just a difficult task weighing the odds."

"So in other words, pretty much what I just said." I looked at my drink before just saying screw it and chugging it.

"Just not on purpose", Ty stated finally after a long silence.

"Woo hoo, that makes me feel a lot better already." I said, slurring my words in an exaggerated manner.

Danny toasted to me and then downed his in a quick gulp, faster than anyone I'd ever seen. "Look, this guy is the reason you are getting a second chance and Ty might be saved from his data corruption."

"Second chance? What went wrong the first time? I mean besides looking like something out of a horror movie and paralyzing the guy who saved my life? Or are you talking about the part where I stabbed Tali in the gut? Or- Okay, yeah, you guys already know that shit, but I'm trying to make a point."

Danny looked over at Ty, "God, he really is a light weight isn't he? Look, you took a rocket in your last mission. Right now you are in a coma and this decides if you wake up or die."

"Yeah, great, no pressure or anything." I muttered. Then I stopped and repeated over my own words in my head. "Ty, do me a favor and make some stupid joke really quick- though the fact that I'm saying that already sort of supports my guess." I looked at my glass, and my eyes glowed while I kept my body still. It slowly rose into the air, glowing blue. "As does that." I said, grabbing it from the air. I'd used my biotics without using hand motions before, but it took a lot more concentration than a drunken man could muster.

Instead of meeting my request. Ty had his head down and looked like he was just punished for saving the world. "Not now Bourne, I think I need to take a walk."

Danny patted him on the shoulder, "Hey, we did this once, right? Not like we can't do it again."

Ty picked up a bottle and threw it against the nearby wall, "How the hell am I supposed to deal with this? I am being punished for being the good guy."

"Hello pot, my name is kettle." I said, tossing a knife from hand to hand, trying to test my coordination. Because if I didn't know better, I would have thought I hadn't had any alcohol in my system in weeks. _Maybe he screwed up with that stuff._

Ty looked at me angrily, "You never tried to be the good guy. What was it you said to Raptor? Oh yeah, 'I'm not a hero like you are.'"

"Doesn't mean I wasn't at least an antihero or something. My point being, quit whining. We both saved the entire bloody galaxy, and we both got screwed over for doing it."

Ty looked off to the side and then looked back. I saw something in his eyes; they held a fire like he was more driven now than ever. "You're right. We both did get screwed over and that really sucks. But you know what, I am tired of an AI telling me what to do."

Danny put a hand on his shoulder, "Don't speak too loud. If he hears you then I can't save you from what he might do."

Ty brushed his hand off, "No, I am sick and tired of being told I can't do something. This time, I am going to go through this game my way. And if some damn AI or Universal God wants to tell me otherwise, I will fuck him up. I'm a mother fucking User. Here to be feared by those that were created. I am the Deadra, I am the demigod, I am the User! Bourne, I say we blow this joint and go pick up Tali. If the AI wants to test me then that's the place to do it at. I fucking dare him!"

I looked at Danny and sighed. "He just royally fucked us over, didn't he? I mean, I've heard of jinxing yourself, but goddamn. That doesn't take the cake, it steals it from a high security vault and leaves a note saying go fuck yourself... huh, maybe I'm not quite as sober as I thought I was."

Danny smiled and shrugged. "Don't know, the AI only talks to me through letters and notes. He could be a fairly lenient guy."

"Why do I not believe that?" I muttered.

Ty stood up on the table. "Listen up, I am going to manipulate until I control the heavens."

He was probably going to say more after that, but I cut him off by putting him in Stasis. "Will you just shut up already? The way you keep tempting fate, that Turian and two Salarians are going to end up being a Pretorian and pair of Scions...fuck, now you made me do it!"

"Hmhmhmhmhmminmoimno."

"I'm only going to let you out if you stop ranting and complaining."

"Okhey."

I smiled evilly. "And if you put a few hundred thousand credits to my account."

"You're just loving this, aren't you?" Danny observed.

"He's been getting on my nerves all day- and I've got a perfect memory, so I tend to hold a grudge about that sort of thing."

Ty let out another noise of protest, so I turned back to him. "Oh, and the other thing- when we do meet up with Shepard- you're going to morph that armor so it's the ugliest shade of yellow possible. No, a really ugly shade of Green. No, split down the middle, with a purple stripe there. No, wait, even better, the whole thing'll be plaid."

Danny sighed and reached over before I could stop him, and did that oh so irritating matrix thing on me, causing me to lose my biotics for a moment, and letting Ty free.

I glared at Danny. "Spoilsport."

Danny shrugged, "Not here so you can have a good time. I am here to make sure you survive."

"Then you should've let me blow off some steam so I don't go nuts."

**Shepard:**

"For the love of god, we better not have missed him or I am going to kill the rapid transit workers."

Shepard made it apparent that she was very pissed with how long it took to get from the Presidium to the Wards. She always hated rapid transit more than the Mako because the cars had to drive themselves instead of letting her drive- though nobody else she served with seemed to feel the same way, for some odd reason.

She stood up out of the car and waved off Kaidan's sad attempt to be chivalrous. She wasn't looking for someone to be close too and she sure as hell didn't want it to be her second in command. That was something she was sure of. Still, she absently wondered if she'd gotten any new messages on that dating site she'd signed up for.

She shook the thoughts from her head and took off at a slow jog to the clinic. Shepard passed several people who all began whispering as they saw her pass. She began to feel her blood boil at the thought of her meeting with the council being televised.

The whispering carried her a little faster and soon she was at the door to the clinic. She keyed the door and was met with three guys holding a woman hostage. The were looking around frantically and aimed right at her as soon as she entered the clinic.

"Just cause you called in for back up doesn't mean we are going to just turn ourselves in Vakarian", the man holding the woman yelled.

Shepard pulled her pistol up and expertly aimed at his head, "Put her down, jackass."

He held her even tighter and took aim at shepard, "Fuck yo-"

The man was cut off as a Turian dodged around the corner and put a bullet in his head. "Gotcha."

The woman took cover and the Turian threw a grenade at the remaining two men. They fumbled backward and tried to escape the blast radius. Still, their effort was in vain as the Turian triggered it with his omni-tool.

Shepard put her gun away but Kaidan kept his out. "Something wrong Lieutenant?"

"Ma'am, this guy just took an unclear shot and could have caused us all to lose our hearing."

Shepard forcefully pulled his arm down, making him lower his gun and walked over to the Turian. "You need to quit being such a boyscout. Hello again, Garrus."

Garrus holstered his pistol, "Commander, I didn't expect to see you. Especially after what you said in the Citadel Tower."

Shepard bit her lower lip when she thought of how she practically called him a piece of shit to his face. "Yes, well, that was before I actually got a look at your reports."

She hoped he would buy her lie. "Oh, I didn't expect you to actually do that. I thought you would have all the evidence you would need with your mission on Eden Prime."

"She didn't-" Shepard cut Alenko off with a furious glare.

"I didn't get to read all of it. But I'm here now to see if you have just one piece of evidence that could push it past a reasonable doubt."

Garrus pointed over to the woman hiding behind a stack of medical supplies. "I was just here to meet Doctor Michel. She contacted me saying she had some information for me."

The doctor stood up and slowly nodded, "Yes, Garrus told me that he was looking for information on Saren and a Quarian was just in here with a audio recording of Saren. She tried to trade it for medical aid. I put her in contact with Fist. He is an agent of the Shadow Broker, so he deals with this kind of information."

"Except he apparently decided he no longer liked breathing and switched employers. Now, he's working for Saren."

Shepard turned back around and barked orders to her team. "Okay, we need to get over to Chora's den quick. Lives depend on us."

She took a step forward but Garrus stopped her, "Commander, let me go with you. I can be a big help when it comes to taking Fist down."

Shepard nodded and continued walking, "Okay, you're in. Let's get moving."

It occurred to her as they headed to the club that Ty had said something about going there with Bourne. She admitted to herself that she hoped they wouldn't be caught in the crossfire- and that if they were there, she might reconsider their help. Bourne might not have been the brightest guy, but she was getting tired of Alenko being a whiner all the time, and he seemed to be a much more skilled biotic anyway.

And she'd meant what she said to Ty about him being somewhat funny. He was a nice guy, even if he was knew he'd be good for the element of surprise with the way he could mess with his armor.

She pulled up her Omni-tool and typed up a message.

**Ty and Bourne,**

**If you get this, we are headed to Chora's Den and could use some help. I have a feeling that Fist might be locking the place down. Whatever you do, don't let them kick you out.**

**-Shepard.**

**Ty:**

We had just exited Chora's Den and to take the short walk to the alley where Tali would be in trouble- though Bourne was walking a bit straighter than I could manage. It looked like we would have everything on our side and I wasn't going to let the AI get the better of me on this one.

"Still can't believe he just- I mean that's just a dick move, am I right?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know, just touching my arm and suddenly my biotics are gone and you're out of Stasis? I was getting back at you a bit, some harmless fun, and then he has to go and ruin it... seriously liver, can you just make your mind on whether or not I'm drunk?"

I began to laugh but had to stifle it before I began laughing uncontrollably, "It's because he's my best friend and we always had each others back."

"Yeah, well, you didn't even get to the part where he actually showed up." he shook his head. "How is it you got a buddy along, and I had to go solo?"

"God this would be a lot easier if I could just transfer my memories over to you. I got to go with Shepard on Noveria because I put Garrus out of commision. Long story short, I mind melded with Liara to get her to trust me. Then, I told Shepard about the rachni which got me in some deep shit and I ended up having to fight four batarians and a krogan. I would have been screwed if Danny didn't spawn right above the Batarian that was about to shoot me in the back."

"Sounds fun." He deadpanned.

I stopped and leaned on the railing of the walkway, "So then I got knocked out after the fight, and Tali tried to convince Shepard to leave me behind."

"Least we didn't have to fight Rachni. I mean, you still had that, and I had to go after Raptor and Iron, but I'm trying to be less of a pessimist."

My omni-tool beeped at the same time his did, and I opened the message, "Jason and Ty, dadadadada don't let them kick you out. Oh shit."

We both looked back at the same time and saw all the customers at the bar being rushed out in an unorganized manner. We had just got the message too late. I looked to Bourne to see if he had an idea.

"Well, the way I see it, we have three options. We wait here for Shepard to show up like a pair of bitches, we say screw it and go after Tali before taking Fist down..." He smiled and slid his shoulder knife from its sheathe. "Or we go back in and knock some heads in. Or, I guess I knock some heads in while you freeze them or incinerate them or go Master Chief on their asses or whatever it is you do."

I had the perfect armor for this occasion, "I got a better idea. Go open the door so I can get some momentum going. I will run from here."

"I assume you're not going to actually tell me what you're planning, and if I do you'll just say I need to trust you?"

I just asked him a question, "Ever played Shadow Complex?"

"Never heard of it."

"Then, there is no use explaining it", I answered.

He shrugged and moved over to the door, one hand hovering over the button, other hand holding a set of knives. "Then all I ask are two simple things. Promise me you're not too drunk to do this, and that you'll leave some for me."

I focused on the armor and it began to form around me. "Can't on number one but that means I can on number two."

The armor fully formed and I took off running. It took a second to kick in but the armor juiced my movements and I was running at the speed of sound. I could barely see anything and I couldn't keep my eyes straight. I began regretting it as I smashed into the door in what felt like three steps.

The door itself smashed in and I was disoriented majorly. The blow caused me to lean on my left foot for support and I began circling the center bar in the Den. The armor I was wearing had a impenetrable shield in the front that fended off bullets and people. So as I ran around I caught glimpses of Bourne grabbing people and throwing them in my path- or against the wall, but mostly in my path. As he did I ended up hitting them with enough force that they would shatter all their bones.

I ran for what felt like a solid ten minutes and felt my armor ping out. It switched back and I was left to stumble and slam into a wall. The pain was unbearable and I struggled to open my eyes.

I heard the sound of a shotgun blast, and then silence.

"Soooo...Did you mean to bust through the door like that?" Bourne asked as he walked over.

I struggled to my feet, "You are an ass. You know that?"

"You could've given me a countdown or something. I figured you'd be going in fast and guns blazing, not going supersonic." He glanced over at a merc that was crawling away and finished him off with a quick blast to the head.

I opened my omni-tool and used an application of medi-gel to dull the pain I was feeling. "Whatever, I'm just lucky I am drunk or this would be hurting way worse."

"...I guess that's a good point." He switched out his shotgun for his pistol. "So are you still in any shape to take on Fist, or do I get to have all the fun to myself?"

I hobbled over and took a seat, "I think we should wait for Shepard so we don't get banged up any worse because she missed the party."

"Well, you're the one who's banged up...but yeah, good point." He slid into the seat across from me. "One question though... who's taking the blame for the door?"

**S7: Okay, I think we are safe. But I'm still afraid. Iron signed my cast with a seriously weird ink that looks like blood and on my foot so it is always facing me.**

**T117: I think that's just his way of saying thank you for inviting him over.**

**S7: I didn't. He came over and ate all my 'get well soon' cake. It was cheese cake for crying out loud! Can't you make him lactose intolerant or something?**

**T117: Just be glad he only ate it instead of putting rat poison in it or something. Apparently he thinks that makes it 'taste better'. **

**S7: Okay, still not happy about it.**

**T117: I'm just amazed nobody got killed...and a little disappointed in the case of Iron.**

**S7: Well, what are we gonna talk about for this author's note? I'm thinking we should give the audience an exact chapter for the fight.**

**T117:...What definition of fight are we using here? Cause if it's verbal, then it's pretty much every chapter.**

**S7: I was thinking physical. Oh, wait, I forgot to mention that I got you a Trebor signal. See, you shine it in the sky like the bat signal but instead of a bat it's an omega!**

**T117: You get a giant zero for yourself too?**

**S7: No, not for me. I had it shipped to your house.**

**T117: Uh huh. Note to self, buy sledgehammer to use with extreme prejudice. BTW, congrats on getting Users: Prime up. **

**S7: Yeah, got my first review in five minutes. Granted it's telling me to put an OC tag but still!**

**T117: Nice. **

**S7: Totally, I didn't punch through my computer screen and cut up my hand with joy.**

**T117: I imagine that would be rather hard to do with that many broken bones.**

**S7: Yeah… *cough*. Totally.**

**T117: So, should we actually tell them what chapter the fight between Ty and Bourne is, or should we just keep trolling them? My vote is for the latter. **

**S7: Na, the chapter is- **_**(What did I tell you last time about spoilers?!)**_

**T117:...Iron. You are going to pay to repair the door you just kicked down, or so help me, I am going to make you arachnophobic and make sure you end up in the same tank as the rachni queen- and a few hundred black widows, tarantulas, and maybe one or two daddy long legs, just for some variety. **

**S7: Or, we could just tie him down and make him watch My Little Pony. I think my roommates have the entire series.**

**T117:... You need new roommates then. **

_**(Yeah, that's what I was going to say.)**_

**T117: Note that I didn't say I don't think it was a good idea. **

**S7: Nah, they are pretty cool. Though, all they want to talk about is how terrible I am for stopping the Liara/Raptor love fest you have going.**

**T117:...Meh, I really don't care that much about them.**

**S7: Yeah, they are more of fans of lesbians than anyone I know.**

_**('Asari aren't female, they're monogendered." Seriously, we need to get her over that in SaWoF.)**_

**T117: What's all this 'we' stuff?**

**S7: You know what, I am almost tempted to go with samus420's idea of having John, Raptor and Cecelia meet so that both John and Cecelia can tell her that it's complete bullshit.**

**T117: Why? Bourne's already told her that more times than he could count with perfect memory.**

_**(AKA, you have no idea how many times, and or can't look it up.)**_

**T117: Yep.**

**S7: Well, you know what they say. Nothing is more believable then when you tell it to yourself.**

_**(Huh. So if I'm like his author avatar-)**_

**T117: Chapter 64: Iron vs Spiders.**

_**(Never mind...wait, that must mean he's scared of-)  
**_**T117: Spiders? Please...Clowns, on the other hand, seriously creep me out.**

**S7: Well, I don't think that I am scared of anything that is real. Ty on the other hand is scared of-**

**^Okay, stop right there. I just came here to get Iron but I don't want you revealing my fears to a crowd of people.^**

_**(Is it-)**_

**T117: Iron, here is a phone. You are going to call and get someone to fix this damn door.**

_**(...With what money? You idiots keep lowering my pay.)**_

**T117:...Would you like a raise?**

_**(Yes-)**_

**T117: Well I'd like a door that isn't kicked in, but we don't always get what we want, now do we? Now get out before I re-reboot SiaWoF and make you a good guy!...Wow, I didn't know he could run that fast.**

**S7: Well, I think that that was it. Anything you want to say Ty?**

**^Yeah, you made me get stuck in a video game because of a User Agreement?!^**

**S7: What's wrong? It's a common thing that nobody reads.**

**^Yeah, well, I wish I could go back to not reading them. I am so scared I read the entire iTunes agreement every damn update.^**

**)I was going to say that at least you didn't get struck by lightning or lose your memory...but yeah, I think you might have the worse deal there.(**

**^Hey Bourne, new idea. Raptor and Liara having a threeway with Ashley. You're not invited.^**

**)...Should I be worried right now?(**

**^Nope, you just won't be able to stop thinking about it next time you see them. How's that perfect memory now?^**

**)Yeah, thanks Trebor. You get an excuse to be able to look crap up when you need to and have it be right, I get mental trauma.(**

**T117: Relax- these AN notes aren't canon as far as you go...Iron, on the other hand, is just nuts enough I could see him breaking the fourth wall.**

**S7: Well, I guess that's it folks. Say goodbye dumbass and Deadpool wannabe.**

**^Fuck you.^**

**)Meh, I'm cool with being compared to Deadpool. FYI- way better than Deathstroke.(**

**S7: Bourne, we can be friends. Trebor, you've just been replaced.**

**)...This is some weird like uncanny valley type crap here.(**

**^Just roll with the punches dude.^**

**)...He's gotten me stabbed, shot, kicked, sliced, warped, thrown into walls, put Iron in my head, and he made me look like a goddamn member of the cullen family!(**

**^Bourne, I was absorbed and… is that lipstick on your neck?^**

**)...Hey, what's that over there?!(**

**^Dude, seriously, I called dibs… wait, did you go crawling back to Ashley?^**

**)What do you mean crawling back? She was willing to stay with me even though ****someone** **made me look like I got in a fight with a lawnmower and lost!...that joke should totally be used by Ty at some point. Anyway, are you saying you think I'd hit Cecelia? Not going to happen.(**

**^Dude, just got a text from Cecelia. She said that she is getting drinks at O'Reilly's. Authors not invited.^**

**)Yeah, well since ****someone**_**also **_**made it impossible for me to get drunk, I guess I'll come along to play darts or something.(**

**T117: Yeah, the fourth wall has just been shattered completely.**

**S7: Well, tell your friends, tell your dog and then tell your psychiatrist because we will be back on Monday.**

**T117: Sayonara.**


	7. Old Memories and New Beginnings

**Shepard:**

Shepard walked into Chora's Den and saw utter destruction. There were bodies everywhere, and not many of them in one piece. Though she'd been somewhat expecting that when she saw the way the door had been blown open- it looked like a rocket, or a very powerful grenade.

"So, where did you guys get the heavy explosives to blow the door open?" She asked, seeing the two sitting at a table not far away.

Ty was holding an ice pack to his head and smiled. "I just used my head."

"Really fast really tough armor." Bourne clarified, tossing a knife from hand to hand, seeming bored.

Shepard raised an eyebrow at their comments. "I don't get it."

"He basically turned himself into a human rocket- head first." He stood up, and looked around at all the chaos. "So, are you going to chew us out for being reckless or not waiting for you or something? Because if you are, you may want to wait until Ty's in a state to really take it in."

Shepard let a genuine smile cross her lips. "Can't argue with what is effective. If he has to be shit faced to make a bar look like this, I'll stock up on tequila."

"Well, to be fair I did a lot of the work too- he basically just ran around and I threw guys in his path so he'd liquidate them." He gestured to one particular spot. "Though I figured doing that with the Krogan wasn't such a good idea, so I just went with the old fashioned way on him."

Ty laughed. "Bow chikka bow wow."

Bourne rolled his eyes. "Anyway, you didn't exactly say what you came here for."

Shepard looked to the hall that split off the main bar, "We are here for Fist."

"The ladies gave him that name." Ty said again, obviously too drunk to control his already out of control attitude.

"I wonder if any of these mercs had something to gag him with." Bourne commented, turning to glare at him for a moment. "Anyway, I'm guessing this guy's got info on Saren, or else he can lead us to someone who does?"

Ty stood up and patted Bourne on the back making his armor shift to an ugly green and purple plaid. "Lets just go with them and stop asking questions."

"You know, despite those drinks, I'm still sober enough to kick your ass if you don't put my armor back to normal in the next five seconds."

Ty smiled and poked Bourne in the chest making the armor revert back to it's basic form. "Shepard, got any of that sober up juice that Chakwas has? I really don't want to deal with the hangover this is going to cause."

She reached back on her belt and pulled up a syringe, "Sure, I always keep it on me for late nights."

"Good, can you-", She cut Ty off by moving behind him and jabbing the needle into the side of his neck. She saw his pupils dilate and then contract back to normal. He suddenly didn't look so lazy but instead looked in pain.

"Yeah, remember what I said about him hitting the door head first? I meant that literally." Bourne said.

She bit her lower lip after thinking about it. "Ouch, must have hurt."

"He's lucky he was drunk at the time." He glanced over at the door. "To be fair, it was somewhat my fault since he expected me to open it, but he didn't give me much warning before he started running towards it at mach four."

Shepard lowered her head and just shook it, "You guys are like two year olds. Never thinking ahead and instead focusing on what's cool and peaks your interest. C'mon, if this Fist job goes well then you can come back on the Normandy."

Ty threw his arm in the air and yelled, "Yea- ouch ouch ouch." He kept his arm there and Shepard looked at him in question.

"You going to put that down?"

Ty looked up at it and had a pained look on his face, "It hurts to hold up but the pain of putting it down could be worse. Also, you said fist job."

Bourne walked over to him. "Full disclosure, it is really tempting to make some "let's find out" crack and yank it down, but we've got work to do." His pistol flew into his hand as he turned back to Shepard. "So I say we go pay Fist a visit."

Bourne walked towards Fist's office and was just out of earshot when Garrus leaned into her ear. "You sure you trust this guy Commander?"

Shepard looked back to Garrus questioningly, "What's wrong?"

Garrus never took his eyes off Bourne, "Something about him doesn't sit right with me. It's like I had a fight with him or something, but don't remember it. I can't really describe it."

Shepard just walked forward and made a mental note to talk to him about it later. Ty and Bourne were stacked on the door and ready to go. She pointed by them and had Kaidan and Ashley go right and Garrus go left with Ty.

"Not to be pessimistic, but unless he's completely deaf, he knows we're coming." Bourne commented, pistol at the ready. Shepard noticed that it was pretty heavily modified, but put that aside for later as well.

"Then I guess we better not disappoint." Shepard said, nodding to Garrus to hit the control to open the door.

Ty stepped forward with his pistol aimed at the two guards, "Freeze, hands in the air."

Shepard face palmed at the fact he was still holding his arm above his head.

"Stay back or we'll-"

Bourne cut him off. "Buddy, it's 8 on 2. Those'd be bad odds if you knew what the hell you were doing, which I can tell by the way you're holding those things, you don't. So how about you drop the guns before one of my friends he does something you'll regret...and seriously, how do I keep ending up being good cop?"

Shepard rolled her eyes at them, "I don't have time for this." With two quick shots she dropped both the guards and marched past Bourne and Ty- Pulling Ty's arm down to stop the stupidity from continuing.

"Oh yeah, that's why." Bourne muttered as he followed.

Shepard looked over to the side and saw a weapon's locker. She stepped over to it and hit a few quick buttons to open the locker. It shot open and she saw an assault rifle, a sniper rifle and a shotgun.

Bourne whistled softly. "Damn, you've gotta teach me how to do that."

Shepard looked over at him and tossed him the shotgun. Then she handed Ty the assault rifle and took the sniper rifle for herself. Now she had a Banshee V instead of a simple Avenger.

Bourne took out his previous shotgun and compared them. "I'll be honest...not really good with comparing these things. I lost my custom shottie a while back, so I just took this off one of my targets."

Shepard looked from the shotgun he was holding and the one she just threw him. "The one I just gave you is a Scimitar IV. It's a lot better than your Storm III."

He looked at them and shrugged. "I'll take your word for it." He said, sliding the new one onto his waist. "Think I'll hang onto the other one though, just in case I need a club." He caught her look as he slid it onto his back, where a sniper rifle would usually be carried. "What? It's worked before."

"Sorry, I've only seen pussies not use a sniper." Her tone was cold and she really meant it. She was from the N7 sniper division and that was where they separated Adults from children. One of her friends that was in that switched to being a Vanguard. Poor bastard.

If he was actually insulted, it didn't show. "Yeah, well, I'm a pretty piss poor shot with one of those- and I'm probably being too generous." He shrugged. "I tend to prefer to get close anyway- not hard to do when I can cover a couple hundred meters in the blink of an eye."

Shepard pulled her pistol up and took position next to the door to Fist's office.

"So, do we want to be subtle and try taking him by surprise, or do we just kick the door in?"

"Good question. How about we use a diversion?"Shepard replied looking at Ty.

Ty took a few steps back and put his hands up as far as they could go without hurting. "Stop, injured guy remember? Can't Kaidan or Bourne do it? They have barriers after all."

She nodded and looked at Kaidan, "You can consider that a standing order. Now, get ready to run in once I open the door."

"But Commander I-",Kaidan cut himself off quickly when she gave him her death glare.

"If you're too scared to do it Alenko, I think I can pull it off on my own anyway." Bourne said with a smug grin.

Kaidan took it as a challenge and puffed up, "Okay, everyone out of the way."

Ty leaned over to Bourne and whispered, "Look who's balls finally dropped."

Bourne simply walked next to Alenko. "Alright, I'll go in first and throw out a couple Singularities. You throw a couple warp fields into those, and we have an explosion that ought to deal with whatever security Fist has left."

Kaiden put his hand on Bourne's shoulder and answered with a sour tone. "Thanks Bourne, but I got this."

"Uh huh." Skepticism dripped from his tone. "Shepard, hit the door."

She leaned over and hit the button. The door hissed and then died quickly. She looked back at the others and looked to see if someone knew what had happened.

Garrus spoke first, "Maybe sabotage. Wouldn't be the first time I've seen it."

"It could be, then again on Eden Prime some doors were on a circuit with others and if you broke a door four more wouldn't work", Ashley followed up with.

Everyone looked back at Ty. "Uh, sorry?"

Bourne sighed. "Alright, plan B." He raised both hands, aimed at the door. "You may want to stand back a bit unless you like getting blown up."

Ty looked at Bourne with a smile, "Oh, you know how to use flare?"

He didn't even look his way as he replied. "It's a work in progress. Seriously Shepard, you should move back."

She looked at his face, which for once held a look of determination, and decided that listening was probably wise. "Okay, just don't kill yourself."

"Yeah, not on today's agenda." He said as she got behind him.

He closed his eyes for a moment, then they shot open, blazing with light, and two almost identical orbs flew from his hand, one a fraction of a second behind the other.

Shepard could see the Warp field for a moment before the other orb hit it, causing a detonation that blew the door inward, fragments sliding across the floor.

"Yeah, a flare would have been cooler. But you still get style points for the explosion", Ty commented.

"How many style points would- forget it." He moved through the doorway, holding his pistol at the ready, taking cover at the edge of the wall.

"Do I have to do everything myself?" Shepard heard someone complaining. "Time to die little soldiers!"

"Yeah,that was pair of defense turrets." Bourne said, popping his head around the corner and hurriedly yanking it back. "I'm not going solo on this one."

Ty rushed in first just screaming, "Today is a good day to die!"

Bourne stopped him cold, waiting until he couldn't dodge to stick out his arm, and driving him back against the wall. "How about we actually take advantage of the fact that there's this many of us?"

Ty pulled the assault rifle off his back and looked angry. "God, you have the uncanny ability to ruin good chances to quote media without people knowing about it."

"Cry me a river." Shepard said, moving through the door as well, followed by the rest. It was actually a bit cramped with that many of them. "Okay, Kaidan, left turret. Ashley right...GO!"

Ashley pulled out her shotgun and dove out into the open blasting the first turret with a carnage shot. At that moment, Kaidan copied Bourne and fired off a Warp followed by a throw.

Bourne swung himself around the corner, a few shots bouncing off his barrier as he threw out a pair of warp orbs of his own, making sure the turrets were destroyed. As he walked forward, he he yanked his arm backwards, and a pistol flew past him and hit the wall.

"Well, looks like you're having a shit day, eh Fist?"

Shepard stepped in and passed Bourne, "Okay, now tell me what happened to the Quarian."

Fist just about pissed himself as he put his hands in the air, "I don't know where she is, that's the truth."

She glanced at Bourne. "Are you going to try that stupid good cop bullshit, or can I just put a round in his leg?"

Bourne chuckled. "Actually, I had a new idea. You be bad cop-" he stored his pistol, and pulled his shoulder knife out of its sheath. "And I'll be worse cop." He took a step towards Fist, who back peddled until he was against the wall.

Ty marched past both of them and put his hand on Fist chest with a skip in his step, "And I get to be the cop from hell."

Slowly red energy- which to Shepard looked like a bunch of ones and zeros- flowed around Ty's hand and then began to flow over Fist's chest. Fist began to struggle and scream as the energy continued to spread. Then, when it was covering his entire body but his mouth Ty spoke in an insane tone that sounded more like his true self than anyway he had spoke before.

"Now, I can really make it painful from here or we can go get the Quarian. Which I know you know the location of."

"Huh. I was just going to threaten to castrate him or cut his eyes out or something, but I think your way works better." Bourne commented, putting his knife away.

Fist's pain had fully taken over and he began blurting everything, "She is in the alley near here but you will never make it there in time. My mercs are going to kill her any second."

"Wanna bet?" Bourne said, turning and sprinting out the door. Shepard had to admit he was fast.

She turned to ask Ty if that was typical, but he was also gone now- as was the energy that had been surrounding Fist.

"What do we do with-"

Shepard cut Kaidan off by putting a bullet through Fist's head. "Come on, let's get over there and back them up. Fist neglected to mention how many guys he sent."

"You could have asked him that before you killed him." Kaidan muttered, apparently not thinking she'd hear.

"Hey, Lieutenant Alenko, do me a favor and head back to the Normandy so you can start writing up the report for this event."

**Bourne:**

As I exited the office, I saw that reinforcements had arrived, but I didn't stop to deal with them, knowing that the others could handle it. I just charged into one, bounced off him, and charged into the one nearest the door. He stumbled back, and I threw a knife into his head before running out the door and towards Tali.

_Man, Cecilia does not fuck around. I didn't even think about the fact that she'd probably kill those two workers. Though I'm guessing Wrex is going to owe her a few credits for killing Fist- unless Ty kills him with that weird Matrix code first, in which case I may have to put him in Stasis to get him to shut up about it._

I rounded the corner that I knew would lead to the spot, and what I saw was pretty close to what I expected, Tali standing in front of a Turian, a couple mercs trying to sneak up on her- the only problem being that instead of a pair of Salarians, they were a pair of Krogan.

_I'm going to slap the shit out of Ty for this _I thought as I quickly considered my options. Tali hadn't seen them yet, but she would in a moment. And her trick with the tech mine would only piss them off.

I gritted my teeth, and charged at the closest one. "Watch out!" I shouted to her as he stumbled into his friend. She turned- which meant she couldn't see the Turian pull out his hidden gun.

I prepared to put her in Stasis to protect her, right as one of the Krogan aimed his shotgun right at my face. Either out of dumb luck or the universal AI thing, Ty suddenly came head first out of a blue rift in the wall, fast, and went directly into one of the Krogan. It was knocked into into the next one, causing them both to stumble, disoriented.

I took advantage of the distraction and yelled at Tali to duck as I threw a knife past where her head had been. It took the Turian in the shoulder, and he aimed his gun at me in anger. I just hit him with a throw orb, knocking off his feet, and out of the fight for a moment.

I whipped back around to the Krogan, right as one slammed into me, running me into the wall and knocking the breath out of me.

"Looks like you're not so tough now human."

I responded by sending my boot knife into my hand, and ramming it home at the spot his head plate met his face before he could react. His eyes widened a moment before I angled the knife up, and yanked. He howled in pain and rage as his brow plate came off, and he dropped me, clutching at it in horror. I pressed my pistol to the gaping hole that revealed his skull and fired twice point blank. The explosive rounds were more than enough to finish him off.

I looked to see if Ty needed help, but the other one was nowhere in sight- though I saw a few pieces of ice that hadn't melted yet and figured he'd cryoblasted him.

I turned around and saw Ty standing over the Turian working my knife into his shoulder; making him scream as he did so. At first I thought it was to get information but after a second look I saw it was just for the hell of it. Something just didn't seem right.

It was a bit too close to Iron's motivations for my comfort, so threw a second knife- this time hitting the Turian in the head and putting him out of his misery.

Ty turned around and I saw he had that red cybernetic viens - matrix code, I knew now- crawling up his face and stopping at his right eye. His face held an angry look, and his eyes were suddenly a patterned blue. Something that hit very close to a certain Turian that happened to have killed Nihlus back on Eden Prime.

Something tugged at the back of my mind- remembering him saying how Saren had almost merged with him. It was enough to get my gun in my hand, and aimed in his general direction.

Ty took a step toward me, and I shifted my aim so I'd hit him in the head if he tried something. On his second step, something changed in his eyes and he took an imaginary shot to the face and turned his head with it. When I saw his face again it was normal, though it lacked the usual stupid grin.

I slid my pistol back onto my hip, though I did keep a hidden knife in my other hand. _Looks like we have yet another thing to worry about now. Fantastic._

_I suppose it's somewhat refreshing to not be the one worried about being taken over by a lunatic, but I'd rather have just avoided the whole institution all together._

I turned to Tali, who'd gotten to cover nearby when I took down the Turian. "You alright?" I asked.

She looked at me with some wonder, like she was trying to find her words. It got awkward after a few seconds but luckily Ty made a cough that brought her back. She shook her head and spoke.

"Thanks to the two of you." By the way she included Ty, I got the feeling she hadn't seen his odd behavior and appearance- though I wasn't going to complain if it meant avoiding having to explain it to her. I myself was going to get it out of him later with violence or alcohol. _Or maybe both._

"Who are you?"

"Bourne. Jason Bourne." I saw Ty's head whip towards me, and a grin appeared on his face.

_Great. Of all the times to make the Double-Oh-Seven intro, I had to do it around him._

Ty laughed and put his hand out for a handshake, "And my name is Riddick."

I glared at him. "Actually, that idiot is Ty Anderson. Feel free to ignore anything and everything he says. It might save you a headache or three."

She looked at me, then back at him, and then back at me. Even with her face behind a mask, I could tell she was a bit confused.

"I, uh... He's just... You can... I'm Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya."

I saw motion to my left, and whipped around, holding the knife ready to throw. I relaxed as I saw Shepard approaching, and slid it back onto my arm.

"What took you so long?" I commented, though my tone was light.

Shepard's answering tone was not. "We had to fight through all the mercs you left behind."

"Well, we saved the Quarian", Ty gloated.

She glanced around and saw the Krogan I'd ripped the plate off of. "I noticed."

She walked up to Tali. "You have evidence that can tie Saren to the Geth?"

Tali glanced my way before nodding to Shepard, "Yes, I got it from a Geth hard drive."

"Hand it over then." She demanded, her tone causing the Quarian to take a step back.

"Ease up, will you?" I hissed into her ear, and she turned to glare at me, fists clenched. "She nearly got her head blown off, and Ty didn't exactly help by introducing himself as a character from a book or something. You being a hardass is fine with criminals and stuff, but for god's sake she's just a kid."

Having learned a thing or two about her by now, I tensed for the imminent punch, but after a moment more of glaring she nodded. "Alright, can you come with us to the council chambers and present your evidence. I.. will... make sure the Alliance awards you for your help."

Ty let a chuckle, "It's hard for you to play the good guy, Isn't it Shepard?"

She turned to him, and I winced as her fist went into his stomach. "Any other comments?"

Clutching his stomach he smiled, "Nope. Have to say though. The dominatrix thing isn't sexy."

_Seriously, is he just suicidal, or is he actually that dumb? Or both, because that'd be about the worse possible way to die._

Shepard looked like she was going to hit him again but she just lowered her head after a moment. Without a word she looked to Tali for an answer. Tali nodded and Shepard began walking ahead of us.

I gave Ty a look. "Dude, do me a favor and stop trying to get her to kill you. Because I don't have the cash to pay for your funeral."

He looked at me with what looked like regret, "I think I took it too far."

"Gee, why would you ever get an idea like that?" I asked sarcastically. "Come on, let's get going before she decides to just leave you here."

Ty walked next to me and rubbed the back of his head, "I guess I have just been around a ton of bros lately and forgot that this Shepard is a..."

"Crazy murderous bitch?" I suggested.

"You idiots know you left your com channels open, right?" Her voice suddenly was in my ear. _Well... we're fucked. _

Ty pulled the comm up and spoke, "Shepard I'm-"

"Don't apologize, you can't take actions you are sorry for. And if you do, you have to live with it." She hung up abruptly, before either of us could respond.

"I'm just going to go ahead and blame you for this." I said, reliving the last time she'd hit me- and the time before that. _Perfect memory can be a real pain sometimes- literally._

"You think she likes vodka or whiskey?"

"At this point, I think our best bet may just be to jump into a vat of acid. It would be less painful than what she'll do to us."

"I'll meet you guys back on the ship", he said before turning and walking toward the shops.

"Oh, sure, way to be a total bitch about it." I said, hoping he'd fall for it and come with us. I figured there was a slight chance Shepard wouldn't be as likely to murder me if he was there to take some of the heat off.

Ty just kept walking with his shoulders down and looking actually sad.

_Great. But, it's not like she can hit me any harder than before- I hope. _I took off after them, right as their rapid transit cab took off.

"And she just left us behind. Great." I sighed and turned back to where I'd seen Ty. He was gone.

_Well, this is just perfect. Argh, I guess I better head for the Normandy then. At least that way if Shepard looks like she wants to murder me, I can just jump off the side and maybe get away._

_I've had some bad days, but I think this one may have just slid its way into third._

**(Damn, those guys really screwed up calling her that, huh.)**

**T117: This coming from the idiot who-**

**(Who was written by you as basically 1/3rd of your psyche?)**

**S7: Can we just hurry up and clear the air with some problems that people apparently have?**

**T117: Yeah, like the fact that they apparently seem way OOC to people. You already talked about Ty's reasons for seeming 'off', so let me address Bourne the same way. Considering all the crap he went through at the end of SiaWoF, it'd be bound to have worn down his sense of humor at least slightly. As far as him being more reasonable goes, or being more of a hardass- he's being compared to Ty in this case. Everything's relative. **

**S7: As well, the person with the () is Iron. I thought that that was obvious.**

**T117: I was wondering about that too- maybe the comments don't like ~ marks, or they hit the wrong thing.**

**S7: Oh, the ~ marks. Ah, no, we can't tell you until you until the person comes in.**

**~Why not? They won't even know who I am until like Virmire!~**

**T117: Same reason I had such evil cliff hangers. *Insert troll face here.**

**^Typical, you always need attention.^**

**~I do, nobody probably even remembers me.~**

**(Should've been funnier/crazier then.)**

**S7: Iron, shut up or else we will sit you down and make you watch the lego movie.**

**(Dude, that looks awesome. It has the goddamn batman, how could it not be awesome? And Morgan Freeman voicing that one guy! That's like...impossible to not be awesome!)**

**S7: Because it is about good people and nothing close to gore.**

**(Meh, even I want to watch something different once in a while...Seriously. The goddamn Batman. And Morgan Freeman.)**

**T117: Focus. Other issue- "I don't like Ty/ Users" "I prefered SiaWoF"- note that I read/typed that in a high pitched and mocking voice. It's a ****_crossover_. ** **And we've been working on this for over a month- maybe two, I don't remember offhand. We've got a plan here...or rather, we have it planned out now, for the most part, so…**

**(You kinda suck with words sometimes.)**

**S7: Well, to be fair, we did intend for our two continuities to rub up against each other like they are duct taped together in a closet until they became friends. At least in this beginning.**

**(Duct taped together in a closet?...That kinda made it sound like they're playing for the same team as Raptor.)**

**S7: Asari?**

**T117: Hah hah, you're both hilarious. **

**~To be honest, I think this should just turn into a slash.~**

**^Fuck you! Fuck this! Anything to add to this before we end this Bourne?^**

**)...Yeah, I'm all for equal rights and all that, but that ain't going to happen…righ-( **

**T117: No, it's not going to be turned into a slash fic...not for you anyway. If Iron keeps pissing me off on the other hand...Wrex seems to be a little lonely right now.**

**^You know, he was the one I was worried about turning this into a slash.^**

**S7: Yeah, though I was going to assume it was going to be some more female slash.**

**T117: Been there done that with Raptor.**

**S7: Trust me, we all know.**

**(Yes, yes we do.)**

**T117: Shrug. Anyway, you got anything else, or should that wrap this up?**

**S7: Should I do Monday Friday updates on Users: Prime or just one day a week updates?**

**T117: Depends on how fast you can get them done. Don't want to go too fast and screw something up.**

**(Cough, Spelling and grammar, cough.)**

**T117: Would you like a cough drop Iron?**

**S7: You know, I am going to gut you once I am out of this cast.**

**(You know, I'm just saying- He's the one typing this, not me.)**

**T117: Don't shoot the messenger. Unless it's Iron, in which case Bourne would let you borrow his Assassin.**

**)Definately.(**

**S7:Oh, can I sign out this time. I think I have a good one.**

**T117: Am I going to regret this?**

**S7: Ego vobis valedico.**

**(I don't even know what language that is.)**

**^Oh, I took a class on it. It's latin.^**

**T117: Meh, I like my version better.**

**S7: Fine, I'll keep searching for a sign off then.**

**)He had "Keelah Se'lai" going for a while there. Seemed to work.(**

**^Fucking Quarians. How about just saying later?^**

**S7: It doesn't seem fancy or special.**

**^Then, 1473I2.^**

**S7: So do later but in 1337? I like it.**

**(Cough. Nerds. Cough.)**

**^Cough. Fuckface. Cough.^**

**T117: Cough. Sayonara. Cough.**

**S7: Cough. 1473I2. Cough.**


	8. We are all Frienemies

**Ty**:

As I walked back to the Normandy, the walk seemed long and the path just seemed to stretch on before me. In my hand was a bottle of Batarian Ale. I figured I would give it to Shepard in hopes she could at least be a little less mad at me. I'd had a girlfriend for four years, lived with her for two, and never messed up this bad.

Whenever this happened with one of my friends, we would just take a swing at the other and get the anger out. That's what I expected Shepard to do but she didn't. It was actually like she had a feminine side under the steel armor she calls skin.

I was halfway to the elevator for C-sec academy when I got a comm ping from someone. I touched my ear piece and answered, "Hello?"

"So, do we want to bite the bullet, or do you think there's a chance we could just wait for Saren to attack and deal with him then?" Bourne answered without preamble.

"We can't. Events will just stop if we don't", I replied remembering my _chat _with Iron. "If we are not there, then Shepard will get pinned down or something and be stuck until we find a way to meet up with her."

"Yeah, that wasn't so much a serious suggestion so much as wishful thinking. I'm here at the docking bay waiting for the rest of you." He paused a moment. "What the heck did you do to my drink? Because it's like I have perfect coordination and concentration, but every other sentence I open my mouth and it's like I'm half wasted."

I looked up at the sky and felt a smile come to my face, "I set it to give you the buzz without the stuff that would hinder you. Plus, I'm guessing that universal sway has something to do with it as well."

"Uh, reality warping is the term. Speaking of which, where the hell did you come from back there? Did Danny change your pistol into a damn Portal Gun when I wasn't looking, or did I do something without realizing it?"

I looked around and caught a glitch on a wall, "No, it's a glitch hop. All glitches have something connecting them. I can ride that stream and arrive at a destination where another glitch exists."

"...you know, it says a lot that I'm not really all that surprised by the answer."

I walked over to the glitch and put my hand against it. Closing my eyes I focused on the route I wanted to take. It lead me right to the Uormandy docking bay but was just above the elevator. I focused on it and called to Bourne.

"Hey, I am going to fire out of a glitch right above the elevator. Please catch me. I have Batarian Ale that cost me a fortune."

"Yeah, considering that you can just touch an omni-tool and be a Billionaire, that doesn't really mean much...right above the elevator you said? Alright, I'll try, but if you're going as fast as last time, no promises."

I felt the glitch open up and I was yanked in. I opened my eyes and saw a matrix code tunnel leading me to my destination. Placing my hand into the code and slowed myself down. I saw a light ahead of me and I called to Bourne.

"I am exiting the rift now."

I shot out of the rift and fell at a slow pace, blue energy surrounding me.

"Honestly, I was only half expecting to actually catch you." Bourne said as he lowered me to the docking bay. "But since I did-" he pointed at his omni-tool. "Maybe you can give me some credits of my own? I went to go get something to eat while I was waiting for you, or for Shepard to get done with the Council, but turns out you need credits to buy stuff. Which of course, I do not have."

I poked his omni-tool and gave him a thousand credits, "Don't spend it all on booze and babes now."

"I'm sorry, which one of us just bought Ale for a chick?...yeah, maybe not the right word for her, but it's your fault I'm too inebriated to think of a better one."

I facepalmed, "When did you become the jokester?"

He shot me a disbelieving look. "I thought you got all my memories? I was actually a more laid back guy before...well, it's kinda hard to pinpoint where it starts, but I'm going to just blame Iron and leave it at that."

"Going over it in my head, it was when that Hero girl shoved a stick up your ass and you worried what Garrus thought of you."

He opened his mouth, then stopped. "Wait a sec, if Iron's back in my head..." he looked at me, the question apparent.

"Yes, you do have your... wet dream? Yeah, I think that works. You still have your wet dream in your head."

"Two things. One, in case you didn't notice, I've already got a girlfriend- in another reality where I'm in a coma, but still...and now I remember why I don't even try to get drunk. Hero was just a friend. And two: Viper was way hotter then she was anyway."

I felt my eyes roll up into my head as a ton of Bourne's memories ran by. I couldn't make them stop and I began living everything he did. Being stabbed, Ashley, Iron, Hero, I couldn't make it stop. Everything was running backwards until I began to cut into his real life. I reached over and touched the Xbox to get in and before that-

Bourne brought me back by smacking me in the back of the head . "Are you even listening to me right now?"

I said the first thing that came to my mind, "Your special time with Ashley was really awkward."

His face went crimson, which clashed with the way it stayed expressionless. "As I recall, you said you were smart enough to not talk about that because you liked having a tongue." He slid his hand over his belt knife. "Did that change?"

I began rubbing my temples as a headache came on, "No, I just had to say something instead of 'you stopped me before I saw what you were like before the game had you."

He paused with his hand still on the knife. "What do you mean by that?"

"I think I got more than just your current memories, I saw you getting pulled into the game."

"And?" He prompted. His face was slightly less red now, but his hand hadn't wavered from his knife.

"You stopped me before I could see any more but something was coming up. It looked like dinner or maybe it's because I am hungry again."

He took his hand away from his knife. "Yeah, me too. And I'm a biotic, so..." he stopped after a few steps towards the elevator, sighing. "God damnit." He turned back around. "The reason you stopped when you did is that there's nothing more to see."

"No, it's cause you smacked me in the back of the head."

His biotics flared for a moment before he regained control. "Think about it: If I had to choose a name from a movie because I couldn't remember my real one..." he looked at me intently.

I had an idea come to mind, "Let's remember, I got your memories from Iron. Not you. Oh, shit, maybe I was about to remember Iron's last playthrough."

He sighed. "I do not remember my own bloody name. Does that not indicate anything to you?" He gave me that same look, clearly expecting the answer to be obvious.

I shrugged and scratched my head looking for something else to talk about, "So, besides dropping in and out of your memories, I keep having this constant urge to talk to Ashley about every one of my damn problems."

"Oh for the love of god, how can you not see- you realize that if you try anything with her I'm going to cut your balls off, right?"

I put my hands up and took a few playful swings at him, "Eh, I think I can give you a run for your money."

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Alright, look. You said you got Iron's memories, not necessarily mine? Or at least my memories second hand through him?"

I just turned around and walked up to the ship, "Can we talk about this later? I really want some alcohol and Kaidan's stash is on the Normandy."

"Will you shut up and just listen for a moment? You're the one that said we needed to work together here!" He suddenly appeared next to me, glowing blue. "Look, when I got zapped into the game, I didn't just land on Eden Prime. Not at first. I got zapped into this body...in one of Saren's labs."

I was really getting fed up with this guy's whole 'all about me' attitude, "Look, I know. But for better than try and figure out your problems, how about we try and get stronger? Like in the fact that I only have some of the engineer powers that my Shepard had and could possibly activate more with your help."

A blue glow surrounded me, the stasis field cutting me off. "What I am trying to tell you if you'll just listen, is that along with forgetting my own name, I don't remember anything about my life before I got zapped here. That's why you didn't see more- because there's nothing to see." He released me abruptly. "And if you'd think this through for half a second, we should wait for Shepard to actually let us on so it doesn't look like we're trying to break into the ship."

I let out a huff and then turned to him, "There was something more. I know there was. I just don't know what it was. Now here's a question for you, I had the biotic power flare mixed in with Andrew Shepard. Do you think that got thrown into the pot of powers I can use or is it just engineer powers?"

"If there was something more..." he slumped against the wall. "Look, I don't expect you to understand why, but I don't want those memories back. Not anymore. As for the biotics..." he shrugged. "I'm the wrong person to ask. I must've got training at some point, but thanks to the whole amnesia thing-" his biotics flared along his outstretched hand. "I don't really know how I actually use biotics. It'd be like trying to explain how I breathe- it's just natural to me."

I leaned against the wall next to him and slid down till I could rest my elbows on my knees. "So, in a change of subject. Did you notice the way Tali was staring at you?"

He gave me an odd look, but shrugged after a moment. "We did just save her life- and take out two Krogan while doing it. By the way-" He slugged me in the arm. "I told you to stop tempting fate! So I'm blaming you for those things." His tone wasn't serious though, and I could tell he was kidding.

I laughed and looked at the bottle in my hand, "Yeah, next thing you know, the Krogan on Therum will biotic charge."

"Please, like that wannabe could come anywhere close to what I can do. Also, I plan on just basically waiting for that-" he made his voice gruff and low. "Surrender. Or don't. That'd be more fun' After that- boom, throw him against the wall, and pump a few explosive rounds into his head."

I looked over at him, "Now whose tempting fate?"

"There's a difference. You're tempting fate, I'm imagining getting revenge on that bastard."

I sat my head back and fought the temptation to take a swig of the Ale, "Revenge huh? A dish best served drizzled with irony."

"Yeah, but if I stabbed him... well, he'd just have another Liver anyway. I might stab him in the head to rip his plate off first though."

I turned my head and just looked at the wall in front of me, "So, did you ever think about waking the blondy up early?"

He didn't respond at first. "I didn't realize that option was even on the table."

I just shrugged and kept looking forward, "It is now."

He was silent for another long while. "If you have my memories, you know that having her could seriously boost my own powers, which'd come in pretty handy. But...last time, she didn't wake up until after Iron did." He turned to look at me. "And having him loose is the last thing we need. We already have one renegade Shepard to deal with."

The bottle felt heavier in my hand and I sat it off to the side, "Well, he's going to wake up after Therum anyway."

"...and you didn't bother to mention that until now?!"

I smiled and cracked my neck, "Sorry, some asshole smashed me up against a wall when it was fresh in my mind."

"Alright, point taken." He admitted. "But to be fair, some idiot nearly let out my archenemy...and that term answers the question of whether the alcohol's still in my system."

"So, lets agree to just put a pin in the conversation and I will tell you more about my adventures in Mass Effect?"

"That might be for the best. I need to consider the question with a clear head. Weigh the cons against the pros. Also, we might just die when Cecilia sees us again."

I held up the bottle and smiled, "Well, thank god I went out and bought us one last drink if it comes to that."

"That doesn't exactly...alright, so you were telling me about Noveria if memory serves." He chuckled at that last part.

"Right, so there I was surrounded by six guards-"

**Tali:**

Tali began wringing her fingers constantly, though she knew that the nervousness should have passed after she gave the evidence to the council. Looking to Shepard she saw that she had her shoulders back and was standing taller than ever. Being a spectre and all it was no surprise.

Taking on Shepard's example, Tali pushed her shoulders back and tried to stand up taller than she was. She needed to be strong, she was going to save the galaxy. Now, with a Katana I on her belt and a techmine in her hand she would take on the galaxy.

Tali began feeling like she was becoming stronger until she bumped into Lieutenant Alenko and shrank away. "Sorry, about that."

He looked over from his tablet, ""Huh, what? What happened?"

"Uh, I bumped into you", Tali pointed out feeling more awkward.

He smiled and nodded before looking back at his tablet, "No problem, just making sure I have Shepard's report filled out correctly before I send it to command."

Tali looked at Shepard and then back to the Lieutenant with a questioning look, "She is having you write her reports?"

He seemed to start grinding his teeth at the thought, "Yes, it is punishment."

"For what?"

He let his arms drop down to his side and took a deep breath, "Look, I have to make sure that this gets finished, why don't you talk to Garrus or something."

Tali looked over at Garrus and felt a scowl come to her face, he was staring at her intent on catching her doing something. Made sense, Turians had a habit of harboring hatred for her kind. Her eyes drifted left of Garrus and she saw Wrex, he was a krogan, enough said.

Tali felt her walking slow as she realized she had just signed on to a team that might hate her. They all had something in common, even if it was how they would kill someone. She on the other hand didn't have anything to talk about with anyone in the group.

Feeling a sense of dread come over her, Tali began searching her thoughts for anything to keep her preoccupied. Suddenly, he came to her mind. The man that flew in and saved her in a rage of biotic fury. Maybe he would talk to her, he didn't seem to harbor any hatred toward aliens.

Tali knocked into Shepard's back and was startled when Shepard spun around and looked at the team. "Okay, we are going to split up here. We can't all fit into the elevator at once."

Wrex made a grunt, "Hm, I have fit into tighter space with ten Krogan."

"Yes, Wrex but you like the smell of sweating men", Shepard shot back.

Wrex let out a low growl but other than that didn't say anything.

Shepard smiled and then looked around, "Now, first will be Tali, Ashley, Garrus and I."

Alenko looked over at Wrex and then back at Shepard, "Ma'am?"

She smiled as if waiting for him to finish his mistake, "Yes, Lieutenant Alenko?"

He put his head down and sighed, "Do you want your report sent now or should I leave it 'til you get a chance to see it."

Shepard walked past everyone and put her hand out, "I can read that on the way down."

He handed over the pad and she walked over into the elevator, "Well, let's get going."

Tali, Ashley and Garrus all stepped in and Shepard hit the down button. The elevator crawled downward at an extremely slow pace giving Shepard enough time to read the report and then turn to her. Tali immediately felt awkward and tried to emulate some sort of courage.

"So, how is it behind the glass?"

Tali felt her shoulders fall a bit but picked them back up, "What?"

Shepard crossed her arms but kept the pad in her right hand, "What's it like inside the suit?"

Tali let the words come to her, "Um ,clean? It's really unlike anything that I know of. It clings to the body... a lot and tends to be a bit awkward going through your adolescence."

Shepard laughed and shook her head, "Sorry, let me make this more clear. How are you? Do you have hopes? Do you have dream? Or better yet, do you have a lover?"

The last question caught Tali off guard and she felt blood rush to her cheeks, "Nope, no way. I am just me and I don't need anyone else."

Gunnery Sergeant Williams seemed to enjoy seeing her flustered and joined Shepard's fun. "I don't believe that. C'mon Tali, there has to be someone?"

Tali began to lose her confidence and took a step back, "Can we stop focusing on me?"

Williams looked from Tali over to Shepard, "How about you commander? Anyone you'd care to see more of?"

Shepard laughed, "Hah, anymore questions like that and I'll demote you Sargeant."

Williams looked away, "Okay fine."

Tali looked at Garrus and caught him looking over his rifle. He was adjusting the sights on it and looking like it was his idea of elevator work. Looking at Shepard, she seemed to have noticed it and her brow rose.

"So, Garrus, got a name for your sweetheart there?"

Garrus looked up from his rifle and didn't flinch, "I am just making sure that it doesn't miss when I put the crosshairs on Saren's brow plate."

Williams' rolled her eyes at Garrus' statement, "Geez Garrus, you ever find time to enjoy something?"

Garrus Put his rifle on his back and then pulled out his pistol, "I enjoy my weapons. What else is there?"

Obviously from that comment, William's and the Commander were going to give him hell for it. But Garrus was saved until the next elevator ride when the elevator landed and came to a stop. Tali just wondered why she didn't have that kind of luck.

As they walked towards the Normandy's airlock, the two that had saved her came into view, sitting on the ground leaning against the wall.

Bourne's head snapped towards them, and he was suddenly on his feet. He did something with his hands that looked like a nervous habit as he turned to face them. Ty, who was sitting next to him, shot up and hid something behind his back. To Tali it looked like a green bottle.

Shepard stopped when she saw them, and crossed her arms.

They stayed like that for what seemed like ages, just looking at each other silently.

"Uh, permission to come aboard Commander?" Bourne asked, breaking the silence.

Shepard sat with her arms crossed for an uncomfortable three seconds before finally saying something. "Alright, but I swear-"

Ty put up a finger and pointed toward Shepard, "There is twenty-five thousand credits in your account. Go ahead and buy whatever you want with it. Consider it a gift from me... and Bourne."

"You think bribing me is a good idea?"

Ty smiled, "That wasn't a bribe. That was just me, er, us being nice. You can keep that even if you don't let us on."

She looked at Bourne. "And what can you offer me? Because it's pretty obvious he's just trying to cover your ass."

Bourne shrugged. "Lady, I think we both know I've got about much chance of talking you into something as I do convincing a Krogan not to try murdering me when I insult him. So really, it's your call. But like I said before, I don't think you're the type to throw talent away. Especially when it's freely given."

Shepard got a devilish smile, "You're right, I don't throw talent away. I exist in this galaxy to cultivate it and make it blossom. Which is why you will be biotically scrubbing the showers and toilets until we reach our first destination."

"...You know, I think the real punishment is that it you just compared me to a flower."

Shepard pointed on the Normandy and just said two words, "Get on."

Ty saluted with his left hand and buried his right arm a little deeper into his back.

Bourne flicked his wrists again and saluted as well. "You won't regret this Commander." He seemed to be trying not to look at Ty as he said it.

"Alright, get on!"

Tali, Williams, Bourne, and Ty all stepped through the open doors and let Shepard get to the front as the decontamination process began. Everyone was silent for a few minutes until Ty said the stupidest line ever.

"Stuck in an airlock with three girls on high protein diets. It's like a dream come true."

"Shepard, if you ever want to borrow one of my knives after he says something like that, just let me know." Bourne commented.

"Heh, Bourne, don't make threats for me. And that is now two destinations that you will be cleaning the latrines. Ty, just shut your goddamn mouth."

"That wasn't a threat, that was a genuine offer."

"Should I make it three destinations?"

"Are you just going to say yes regardless of what I say, or is there a possibility I can talk my way out of it?"

"Okay, you're right. Ty will help you with the next four latrine cleanings. Please wait till after Wrex takes a shower."

Tali heard Ty lean over to Bourne and say, "We're in luck, he never takes a bath."

He leaned back to reply. "Then by that logic, we'll never have to clean those things."

Tali caught them do a low five and then they stood still while the scrub program finished.

"Welcome to the Normandy" Shepard said. "Private Bourne and Private Anderson."

They exchanged a look and then Ty looked to Shepard, "Private Anderson?"

"When exactly did we say we were joining the Alliance?" Bourne added, glancing at Tali and Garrus. "Are you making them privates too?"

"Why private Anderson? That's not even my last name. Seriously guys... and girls.", Ty threw in.

Tali glanced at Bourne, because she could have sworn that's what he'd introduced him as.

"Bourne, it's because I want to make sure everything you and tweedle dumb do is recorded in Alliance record and Ty, it's cause you look like an Anderson to me... except you aren't black, have a strong body or even the right hair cut. Also, I heard Bourne say that's what it was. You know, I will look into having it changed. What is your real last name?"

Ty looked over at Bourne and smiled, "Flynn, Ty Flynn."

Shepard stepped onto the Normandy and Tali caught her comment under her breath. "I would have stuck with Anderson."

"So, how exactly do we merit 'official recording', yet the nonhumans here don't?" Bourne persisted, following her.

Ty took off the opposite direction in a hurry like he was on a mission, still trying to hide the green bottle. Williams followed him at a much slower pace and didn't look like she knew what to do. Tali, just stood in place with not a clue as to where to go.

"I mean, seriously, if you're going to-" Bourne's voice was cut off with a loud "Whap!"

"If you don't quit whining, I'll make you junior private Bourne, negative first class. Now go get your gear stowed and see to those latrines."

Tali just shook her head and stepped onto the normandy, "This is going to be one giant catastrophe."

**(So, since Trebor couldn't make it to this meeting-)**

**T117: Get out of my chair before I use the ejector seat function.**

**(...Your chair has an ejector seat?)**

**T117: You want to find out, or just shut up and go to your corner?**

**S7: Sorry I'm late. That frogger fic is just kicking my ass.**

**T117: Right.**

**S7: What can I say, it is difficult to capture the reaction of a valiant hero who is a frog.**

**T117: What, you've never heard of Battle Toads?**

**S7: Dude, I know that story forward and backward. I read the comic books. Here is the thing, it's like the ultimate SI since the authors turned themselves into the battle toads. Frogger, is just a frog.**

**(And he doesn't even punch his enemies in the face- since they're cars.)**

**^More than that, he just hops.^**

**S7: Exactly, I'm at 2,000 words so far but the ending is just, damn.**

**(If they can make an entire movie out of legos, you should be able to make a story about a frog. Throw in some...I don't know, cure for the disease his sister has as a macguffin and call it a day.)**

**S7: Wow, you actually have good ideas.**

**(One of us has to- you don't think Trebor came up with those sick one liners and quips, do you?)**

**T117:...I don't even know where to start with what was wrong with that sentence. **

**^Okay, anyway, we got a question that is not about logistics or how it was made on the story. Do we answer that now or wait until chapter ten?^**

**S7: I figure since it didn't fit into those categories and it is opinion based we might as well answer it now.**

**)You've kinda just been answering questions as they popped up anyway- like T117 talking about the "OOC" thing, or telling people to stop whining about Users compared to the first World of Fiction story.(**

**S7: Anyway, what would we do if Hero and Iron got real bodies?  
^Get hit a lot more than I already am getting now.^**

**(Well, first you'd get knocked out, then you'd wake up dangling by the ankles with me using all of Bourne's knives to turn you into pincushions.)  
)Iron, how many times did we fight in the first story?(**

**(Uh...three? I guess? Depending on how you count it.)**

**)And how many of those did you win? And follow up question: When we fought and I kicked your ass, did I have Hero in a corporeal body helping me, along with a guy who could turn himself into Iron Man if he wanted?(**

**^God, you are just hooked on Iron Man ain't ya?^**

**(Have you not seen the movies? Tank Missile?)**

**S7: Yeah, he wouldn't stop talking about it in the meetings over armors we planned to use. Anyway, I feel that while Hero and Iron having bodies would be a fun but at the same time the thought of them not being in Bourne's head scares me. It would be difficult with one Shepard but with a maybe/probably/psychopathic Shepard to go with two more? Nah, count me out.**

**T117: Yeah, what he said.**

**(Don't I get a say in this?)**

**)No!(  
T117: NO!**

***NO!***

**~Why are you saying no? You would get a body too. That means you could see Thane if this carried into the second game.~**

***...I liked the guy, but not enough to deal with Iron.***

**^Yeah, so that is five votes no. One vote yes.^**

**(...Shouldn't I get like veto power for being the funniest character?)**

_**That would mean that Danny would get a veto power for being the funniest character in Users.**_

**(Nah, Ty was funniest- cause he was the most pathetic. It made me want to laugh the whole time.)**

**)In which case, he gets veto power. So it's five votes no, plus a veto for no. You just suck completely no matter what.(**

__**Yeah, Iron.^ Takes out omni-blade and stabs him in the gut. ^You can take it back now or I can turn it into an omni-tazer.^**

**(...Yeah, Layla was the worst. She just was a complete bitch the whole way through.)**

**Iron gets stabbed from behind. ~I am here too you know.~**

**(And they still have no idea who you are.)**

**S7: Actually, I think by that last dialog people would figure out she is Layla.**

**)Well, now they would, since you pretty much lit it up in Neon.(**

**^You could have made a Cody joke. He is the only one that didn't get invited to this shindig.^**

**(Way to ****not ****spoil guys.)**

***Here's another one- Iron's going to get his ass kicked if he does show up.***

**(Right, sure I am. And you're going to turn evil, and Ty and Bourne are going to switch bodies, and we're both going to have clones from hell, then I'm going to somehow think of a fourth thing to say sarcastically.)**

**S7: Wow, that is utterly ridiculous. **

**)Did you seriously just say "Clones from Hell?"(**

***Me? Turn Evil? Have you been making out with a drell recently as well?***

**^And me and Bourne switch bodies? No way in hell I am going to look like a guy that didn't understand knife safety.^**

**)How do half centimeter wide permanently red scars look like knife wounds? Also, which one of us was based off a seven year old here?(**

**^Hey, I met the kid and I am honestly glad I was based off him. He's a machine. Like, robocop got nothing on this guy.^**

**(The original or the reboot that I kinda think they're going to screw up but still want to see cause it looks like it might be cool and really violent?)**

**^Either or.^**

**S7: Anyway, I think that's all the time we have. Guys, pull your blades out of Iron. He has to go weed my garden.**

**(...It's the middle of winter.)**

**S7: Then, I guess you better take a snow shovel so you can dig out the garden as well. Ah ah ah, it's in your contract. Then, you have to do what Trebor has for you.**

**T117: Get all the snow off my driveway, pick up dry cleaning...Oh, and I'll need you to stand still so I can practice with my slingshot for a bit.**

**S7: Who are you, Bart Simpson?**

**T117: No- Bart is more accurate than me.  
(Yeah, I'm putting a watermelon on my head instead of an apple this time- maybe you can actually hit that.)**

**S7: Damn, guessing you're not from Idaho then.**

**T117: Nope.**

**^Wait, since I am doesn't that make my character a good shot with a sniper rifle?^**

**S7: It would, if the game didn't screw with your targeting.**

**^Then, why can I use a shotgun.^**

**S7: Uh… I am going to use one of my creative liberty cards.**

**)That's how he explained Iron's ability to jump around into bodies so he could fight me at the end...and scar my face up.(  
(You are just never going to let that go, are you?)**

**^Damn, well, luckily you only have five more.^**

**T117: He can have my spares for this story if he needs them.**

**^Nooooo! Wait, how many does he have?^**

**)At last count...let's see, factor in reviews and favorites- artistic liberties, those that can be used cause of the reality warping as an excuse times two for Ty and the Code thing...three dozen.(**

**^Oh shit, that is not good for us.^**

***No, no it is not.***

**S7:1473I2**

**T117: Sayonara. **


	9. Off We Go into the Wild Black Yonder

**Bourne:**

There was at least good thing about Ty- he was only human, meaning that he needed as much sleep as anyone else. Whereas I only needed a few hours worth, and could get some time away from him.

_And from Stripperella. _I thought as I rubbed my cheek where she'd slapped me. And then had told me in no uncertain terms that if I didn't like my rank, I could get off the ship. Via the airlock- and not when we were docked either.

I shook my head to focus myself as I choose a program for the shooting range. It was labeled 'sniping practice'- which for Raptor had meant a pair of charging Krogan from 6 feet away. I was hoping that's what Cecelia meant by it as well. I sent my pistol into my hand and hit the start button.

I was suddenly face to face with the Krogan, and rather than trying to dodge, I threw a lift field that sent them both into the air. Two point blank explosive rounds were more than enough to finish them off- a second before the time limit ticked to zero.

I took no small satisfaction in having beaten it this time- when I had accidently used that program what felt like years ago, I hadn't even managed to take down their shields. It was a measure of how far I'd come since ending up there.

_Except this isn't the same world I landed in. I've got Ty, an irritating "User", a renegade version of Raptor that seems bent on punching us as much as possible, and some all knowing AI trying to keep us alive, but at the same time make our lives living hell._

I angrily scrolled through the programs again, and choose one labeled "Onslaught."

I was greeted with the sight of a few hundred Batarians, and I let out a sound of pure rage as I charged into the middle of them. I battered them aside with biotics, I absorbed bullets with my Barrier, I shot them with whatever guns I took from their corpses- as Ty might have put it, I was in the Zone.

Finally, they managed to wear down my protection and one got a killshot. I was knocked to the ground, surrounded by the carnage before the holoprojectors shut off.

I lay on the ground a moment, letting myself recover.

_Well, that was a workout. Might need to actually grab a biotic ration pack in the morning. _I sat up, cracking my neck. _Or possibly now._

Though my heart was pounding, and I was drenched in sweat, I felt more relaxed than I had in ages.

I glanced over at the treadmill, and shrugged as I got to my feet. I stripped off my armor and I set it for a slow pace, cooling off as I thought. It was the first time since waking up that I'd been able to be in utter solitude. The hum of the treadmill became background noise as I ran mechanically.

_Alright, so the big question here is if I can trust Ty to release Hero, without also setting Iron loose. Apparently, the latter is coming no matter what, but if he managed to take over Ty's body, he'd be nigh unstoppable._

But the idea of having Hero back to back me up was not an unpleasant one. The extra power she could provide would definitely come in handy if the AI ramped up the difficulty- and considering the Krogan that had replaced the Salarians, I got the sense that it would do just that, and more often than I'd have liked.

_And maybe she'd have some tips on how to avoid Cecelia's wrath. Or on how to deal with Ty. Or...well anything. _

I stopped the treadmill, feeling my breathing speed up. I'd managed to avoid certain thoughts, but they'd started to pile on all at once.

Virmire, the Council, the Thorian, Benezia, every other thing I'd been forced through last time. I knew they were coming again, and I knew I wouldn't be able to avoid them either.

The knowledge that Ty would be there did little to help- it actually made it worse in a lot of ways. Half the reason I'd been able to make it through was reality warping in my favor- making me a Spectre, keeping Tali alive until I arrived, ect. But according to Danny, it could work against Ty, like back on Eden Prime.

Or the reverse was also possible, where the world would become all digital, and I'd be the outsider in Ty's matrix of a reality.

He'd all said that if we didn't work together, then the galaxy was doomed. Yet if we did work together, our different natures of existence might very well doom it just as surely.

"Do you need a paper bag or something Bourne?"

My nerves were on edge, and I instantly had my pistol pointed in the direction of the voice. I lowered it as soon as I realized it was Cecilia.

"Or are you just sleepwalking?"

I glared at her as I stored my gun. "I need a lot less sleep than a typical person."

"And is that why you were about to hyperventilate?" She asked sardonically.

"You know what, I'm not in the mood to deal with this." I went to move past her, but her arm slid smoothly in front of me as she smiled.

"What's the matter? Does the truth hurt?"I looked at her a moment before yanking her arm down and storming past her. "You know, if you are going to be a little bitch about it Bourne. You can always just quit."

I wheeled around, biotics flaring."Let's get something straight here- I don't quit. And I certainly don't let myself be lectured by someone like you." At that point, I was honestly hoping she would try to hit me for that- in my current state, I was sure I'd actually be able to block it if she tried.

She pulled a green bottle out from behind her back, "Relax, I just came down here to talk to you. Honestly, it is the first time we can talk without me having to keep up the hardass act."

I considered her words a moment before powering down, sensing she was genuine. "Any particular topic in mind?" I asked, trying not to look at the bottle. Assuming that Ty hadn't gotten to it, I could fake drunkenness while she actually lost some inhibitions. Which- _assuming she doesn't start stripping or something- _might mean I could get a real sense of her character.

She walked over to a crate and sat the bottle down on it. "Do you think we have a real chance at this?"

I tried to get a sense of her own opinion from her tone. She didn't sound pessimistic, but she wasn't all that confident either. After a moment, I walked over to where she was as well. "Well, that depends on how you define success. Because if you expect help from the Council... if they actually believe that a bunch of ancient synthetics are coming back to wipe them out before just that happens, I'd probably drop dead of surprise."

Smiling she replied, "No, I meant drink this bottle without Ty finding out and coming to join us."

I couldn't tell if she actually meant it, but I decided to go with it. "Depends on how fast we drink it." I said with a smile.

"Well, I figure we have some time since Garrus and Ashley are interrogating him in the medbay."

I didn't allow my surprise to show on my face- nor my worry, since I didn't even want to admit to myself that it existed. "About what?"

Shepard made a surprised face, "Oh, I'm sorry. I guess you missed him turning into a giant with a suit of magic armor."

"Back on Eden Prime, you seemed to just go with it. Hell, when I confronted you about it, your response was to swing at me." I tensed slightly in case she suddenly decided to actually pay me back for that.

"Again, hardass act. If I show any weakness, then most of the crew will start to lose moral. If that means someone can help us, I accept their help but have my gun ready for anything. What's the expression? Keep one hand armed and the other for a handshake."

I glanced at the bottle- some of it was already missing, and I had a fair bet where it'd gone. "I guess I can see where you're coming from, but I think that moral might also be affected by the fact that you can come off as-"

"As a crazy murderous bitch?" She said, mocking my words from earlier.

"Well...yeah, pretty much."

"Bourne, nobody cares if I am a crazy murderous bitch. They care that I am the crazy murderous bitch that is in control. Like that one guy from the movie series about pirates from the millenium years."

I chuckled. "You know, it's crazy how much you remind me of this other N7 I knew, yet are so completely opposite in other ways."

She smoothed her hair back and gave me a very outrageously sexy look. "Which one of us looks better?"

"I plead the fifth." _That's another sign that I'm not as stupid as I used to be._

A chuckle came to her as she snatched the bottle off the counter, "I can still belt you one if you don't tell me, you know?"

I shrugged. "I didn't really look at her that way- she was more of a friend...also, she didn't exactly swing my way, if you catch my drift." _Not like it's really private if its an alternate version of her._

Shepard began to laugh hysterically, "Ha, you got friendzoned by a lesbian?! How did it hurt when you realized she wasn't into you? Were you sad?"

"I was already in a relationship at the time, so it's not like I was after her. I was more surprised than anything because she started using an Asari as a pillow when she didn't realize I could see." I chuckled. "The funniest part was that she insisted that Asari only had the one gender, so they weren't technically women, and every time someone called her out on it, she went red as a tomato."

She cracked the bottle and took a swig, "Ha, they have hips, lips and everything in between. There is no way they are anything other than women."

"I said something similar." I gestured to the bottle, and she handed it over. I took a swig and laughed. "The funny thing was that someone else actually got friendzoned. You know, she was just being polite and he misinterpreted it, then someone spilled that the two of of them were already in a relationship...let's just say it didn't go well." My mirth faded as I remembered the aftermath of that conversation, and I took another swig, trying to keep my hand away from the scar Tali's knife had left in my arm.

Shepard leaned against the box and sat on it, "I know someone like that. Put him in his place yesterday to make sure I wasn't sending him the wrong messages."

It didn't take a genius to figure out she was talking about Alenko. _Unless- _"Yeah, maybe I should warn you that when Ty was looking up a few things about you, he may or may not have stumbled across your dating profile..." _I hate to- okay, I really don't mind throwing him under the bus, but if he keeps acting the way he has, she's going to murder him. _

She just waved me off and snatched the bottle away, "No worries, I like Ty. Seems to always look on the bright side. I can break his cheek and he will just be happy he has two."

I thought back to Chora's den, when he'd found out that he would have to do it all again- I was glad we'd finally found time to discuss exactly what "all" was. "I think in a way, he's putting on a mask too. You try to- scratch that, you completely succeed at seeming a hardass, and he tries to put a positive spin on things. Underneath that though, it's another matter."

"What? Never seen Ty's deepest darkest secrets? I'd expected you two to share a brain with how much you have talked in the last day and a half."

"Ugh, please never even joke about me sharing a brain with someone like him." I almost found the thought of having _Iron _back in my head more appealing.

Shepard took a long drink and then handed me the bottle. "You know, I think I like Ty better than you."

"What can I say? I'm a hard guy to like." I took a swig, though it was pretty clear I might as well have been drinking water for all the effect it was having. "I keep most people at a distance, I don't take shit from anybody, and hate dealing with idiocy. Plus, the whole 'no expression' thing tends to weird people out."

She looked at her omnitool, "Well, I guess that's all the time we have. I need to get back to sleep and make sure Ty hasn't killed anyone."

"If he did, it'd be by accident. I don't think he's in the same vein as you or me when it comes to killing. If we had to kill someone in cold blood-" I snapped my fingers. "But I'm not so sure that he would."

She looked at her omni-tool again, "Let's hope so, cause I just got a message from Chakwas and Garrus isn't going to be up in time for Therum."

I sighed. "I can't wait to hear what that dumbass did this time." _Though at least it was Garrus he took down- no loss there._

**Ty:**

I stood across from Ashley, holding a syringe in her hand that she had been trying to stab into me just moments ago. Luckily, I had woken up before she did and fended her off. Now, Garrus was tazed and knocked out after he tried to help and she was ready to make a move.

"Hey, Ashley, got a poem for you. There once was an alliance bitch/ who tried to fight with someone wrong/ She didn't last long/ She is in now in need of a stitch/ Too bad for the alliance bitch."

She just shook her head, "That was the worse poem I've ever heard."

I activated my omni-tool and fired a cryoblast at her hand. It caught and froze the syringe, making it shatter in her hand, "Well, then go away. Or I will use more bad poetry."

She pointed her pistol at me in response. "The commander wouldn't be happy if I killed you, but that doesn't mean I can't wound you and have Chakwas patch you up."

"What am I even doing here? Why were you and Garrus carrying me? Where's the pie I have been craving since yesterday?"

"Shepard wants to know exactly how you keep warping your armor into something else. And she decided to have us bring you down here to talk about it." She shrugged. "I'm not really going to argue with her."

I deactivated my omni-tool and put my hands out, "The ability I have is incomprehensible to you. It would be like trying to explain to a dog, how to use the toilet. I just can't... Well, actually, I haven't tried that. I wonder if I could manipulate a dogs code and teach him. That would be something... but where would I get a dog?"

"Do I look like I'm in the mood for this type of crap? I already sent a message to Shepard, so she's probably on her way here. So it'll go a lot faster if you just start talking."

I sat back against a bed and looked at her, "How about we talk about you? I'm completely uninteresting and could use a distraction. Tell me about yourself, love, siblings, interest in poetry even. I can wait until Shepard gets here."

"If you're trying to flirt with me, you're failing pretty badly."

I put my hand to my chest and made a fake gasp, "Huh, me flirt with you? Never! Honestly, I just wanted to talk. I never got a chance to talk to you before..."

"Yeah, I wonder if that has to do with the hypnosis you used on Alenko and I. If it were up to me, you'd have been spaced as soon as we took off- or at least left there to for someone else to deal with."

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, "Okay, that's the problem Ash-can I call you Ash?- you guys were going to leave us there so I had to think quick. Can you blame me for self preservation? You after all were living by that for a few hours before Shepard arrived."

"You're comparing killing Geth to giving someone short term memory loss?" She shook her head. "You really should have just let Bourne handle it- he at least seemed to know what he was talking about."

"You don't even remember. Alenko was going all power crazy, just two seconds after Shepard was out and you weren't doing anything to stop him. I did what I had to do to get off that rock and live another day."

The doors slid open, cutting off her reply as Cecilia and Bourne walked in.

"What did you do this time?" Bourne asked, almost resignedly.

I smiled and shrugged, "Bourne, you remember what I told you happened last time I was held captive in a cell... by a turian." I finished by pointing to Garrus laying against the wall in a daze.

I doubted that he was really upset by that- saying he and Garrus hadn't gotten along was an understatement.

"You know, if you'd just explained it earlier, you wouldn't be-" He stopped, and turned to look at Shepard. "What is it about you that somehow makes me end up being good cop every bloody time? I should just be threatening him with severe violence if he doesn't wise up, not trying to talk him down or calm him down."

Shepard opened her mouth to say something but closed it immediately. She covered her mouth and did what looked like a hiccup before replying. "Don't worry, I got this."

She walked right up to me and I flinched, waiting for a punch but nothing happened. Instead, she pulled me in close and planted one right one my lips. It caught me by such surprise that I spilled everything about my powers.

"I am a being from a reality where this is a video game. The armors I use are ones from other games. The reason you see the energy that looks like ones and zeroes is because it is the matrix code for the game that I am manipulating. Wooh, I said too much."

Bourne facepalmed- hard. "You know, it's times like this I wish alcohol actually had the same effect on me that it did on other people." He glared at me with novas for eyes.

I put my finger up and called over to Bourne, "I can fix that."

Looking around everyone else was looking at me with their mouths open or like I was stupid. Except for Garrus, the floor was all he was looking at, with a lot of drool coming down the side of his mouth.

I pointed over at him and pointed. "Um, I think you better help him."

"Ty, I think you're the one that needs help. Serious mental help." Bourne's biotics flared along his arms.

I put my hand up and flipped him off, "Thanks for your support buddy."

He smiled sarcastically. "Any time. Shepard, give the word and he's out cold. "

Shepard shook her head and pointed at the door, "Everyone out, Chakwas needs to look at Garrus. And I need to sleep. We can continue this in the morning when I am not about to pass out."

I waved at everyone and walked to the door, "Bye, and I am going to lock my bed in a way that won't allow me to be carried off and injected by a syringe this time."

I made it to the pods, but just when I thought I was in the clear, Bourne appeared out of nowhere and bitchslapped me across the face. "Are you completely batshit fucking insane? Even Iron wouldn't have pulled something like that!"

I punched him in the gut in retaliation- though he barely reacted beyond clenching his fists and glaring. "I was carried off by a Turian and your girlfriend, I might have already been injected with that syringe, and I was controlled by a woman for four years. So excuse me if I screw up. Now, can I go to bed?"

His expression darkened, and his eyes blazed a moment, before both went back to normal. He took a deep breath, and finally nodded. "Alright. But we're going to talk about this in the morning- and for both our sakes, we better hope we can convince them that what you said was due to tiredness, or a head injury, or maybe the drugs." He turned to a nearby pod, opening it. "And if they don't... then we better hope you really are a god, because we're both going to need one hell of a miracle." He climbed in and reached up to close it.

I snapped and pointed at him, "Never said I was god."

"Then I guess we better start praying." He said, closing it before I could reply.

I just walked off toward the cafeteria and said just under my breath, "Sweet dreams, prick."

I grabbed a food portion out of the box and opened it. It was lasagna, or at least I thought it was lasagna. The side of the package said cheeseburger but inside the cheese burger packet was something resembling lasagna. I just shrugged and ate away.

I ate the entire bag, the side that came with it and was down to the pudding when one sad lieutenant came around the corner. "Hey."

My mouth was full so I raised my hand in pause to swallow. "What's going on Alenko?"

He sat down at the table and began to rub his head, "Damn headaches again. I'm a L2 and-"

"I know, you get headaches but it's not that bad if you consider your power output to the frequency and pain of it."

He wiped the sweat on his forehead and covered his eyes, "What I wouldn't do for some tinted shades."

I held a finger up and pressed down on one of the bags. It changed shape into the pair from Jack's alternate appearance, "There you go."

Kaidan picked up the glasses and slid them on, "Wow, this works perfectly. How the hell did you do that?"

Leaning back in my chair I replied, "It's a User thing."

**Tali:**

Tali watched the fifth scrub program scan through all the files. She couldn't believe that she was now on the most advanced ship in the galaxy and working on it. Even the job of running scrub programs seemed fun.

The program just finished and everything was finally falling into place. she just typed a few more commands and she was done for the night. Tali walked over to engineer Adams to tell him.

"Hello Adams, I just finished the scrub."

He looked over at her and then back to his console, "Okay, next in line will take over from here. Go catch some shut-eye before it gets too late."

She nodded and headed for the elevator that lead to the upper levels. Upon entering the bay, she saw the shooting bay at the far end, where Bourne was currently taking on two holographic Geth prime and coming out on top. Tali checked the time and saw that it was barely 6:00 in the morning- much earlier than she'd have expected anybody to be up.

He seemed to be trying to do something specific with them, since she saw a few opportunities where he could probably have taken them down. Instead he just kept dodging their attacks and keeping ahead of them behind cover.

As one of them got close, he stood up and hurled a singularity at it, keeping it from getting closer. Then he turned to its friend, and started glowing blue. Tali only saw a blue flash, and suddenly he was in front of the Geth, knife in either hand, stabbing it in the torso and ripping it open.

She felt a slight chill at the sight, though it passed a moment later, and she didn't know why she'd felt it in the the first place. He shoved his hand into the hollow torso, and Tali heard metal warping as he drew his hand out, turning back to the other one.

It seemed to try to follow him, but it stayed motionless as it slowly collapsed inward on itself before finally going offline with a loud crash.

It fell to the ground a moment later, leaving Tali unsure what exactly he'd done to it. She turned to see what he'd done to the other one, right as something exploded, and her visor darkened to protect her eyes from the flash.

When she could see again, the holograms had faded and Bourne was apparently looking for another simulation to run.

"I don't know how it works in Quarian culture, but with humans it's generally a bit odd to stare at someone for that long without saying anything."

She jumped slightly as his head turned towards her, having apparently been aware of her presence. "Uh, hi."

"Tali, right?" He asked, turning to face her. "You're up early- or late, depending on how you look at it."

Tali forced herself to calm and found her reply, "Late, I just got off duty at the engine core."

"Might want to take a book if you're taking the elevator up to the sleeper pods." He glared past her down the hallway that lead to the device in question. "I swear, it's like that thing's _designed _to take a century to get anywhere."

Tali tilted her head, "Uh, a century? Do humans have a different way of measuring time?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "It was a figure of speech- or metaphor, I never understood the difference." For some reason, he seemed a bit...on edge. At least going off his body language- his face never twitched.

"Something bothering you?"

He glanced over at her. "Let's just say Ty rarely seems to think before he acts."

"Sometimes, thinking before you act is the best way to act", Tali replied remembering some of her father's lessons.

He nodded in agreement after a moment's thought. "I suppose there are times that's true. But other times it's the best way to get someone killed." By the way his fingers twitched towards a fist, she gathered Ty's had been the latter.

Tali thought back to how many times they had an eezo core go critical and how many had died because of it. "Bourne, people die. Sure we can try and lessen the toll but people always die."

He allowed a hint of surprise into his expression. "Believe me, that's a lesson I learned a long time ago." His face darkened. "What I'm talking about is creating a risk where none existed before." He shook his head. "I don't want to bore you with my problems."

Tali shook her head, "No, it's okay. I am enjoying this talk. Did you ever think that maybe he tried to think it out and he ended up getting more people killed than if he would have just acted?"

He was silent for a moment. "Perhaps. But from what he's told me, he's done a similar thing before- not exactly the same circumstances, but not all that different either." He looked down, thinking. "I generally think things through, and it usually works out."

"Are you sure that he has instincts like yours? If a machine is hardwired to act one way, it can be a difficult feat to try and reprogram it."

He laughed. "I can be all but certain that he doesn't...and I suppose there's been times I've _overthought _something." He added grudgingly.

Tali gestured to him, "Then there it is. He's not like you, he works a different way than you do. If you keep trying to have Ty be on your level then things won't work. You need to learn to fight on your level and let him fight on his."

"Yeah, great idea. Minus the fact that being around him keeps dragging me down to his level."

Tali began to lose her confidence at Bourne's constant pessimism, "Uh, well, ever think that you are not on his level but a level in between? Like you actually bring him part way to yours and he brings you part way to his?"

He didn't reply for a while, and she wondered if he'd heard her. Just as she was about to say something else, he spoke up. "I guess you have a point. Though I'm starting to wonder which of us brings the other up, and who brings the other down. Mostly because I'm not so sure it's me doing the raising anymore." She didn't know if he was aware of his left hand going to his upper arm, tightening around it.

Tali made some headway and stood a little taller, "What do you mean? Seems like you would be pulling him up."

He glanced over at her, then suddenly realized where his hand was and yanked it down. "It's not exactly something I like talking about. The short version- I lost control, and I nearly killed a friend- several actually."

Tail brought her hand up slowly and patted him on the shoulder, "Hey, it's okay." He tensed at the contact, and his arm twitched slightly- as if to move her hand. "We all lose control sometimes. With some it's our emotions and others the situations we get into." Tali started to think back to the Crescent Nebula and her now dead friend Keenah.

He took a step to his right, away from her. "Doesn't make it easier to forgive yourself."

Tali felt her blood pulse, "No, but you have to get over it. Or else you will slowly lose yourself to it."

He turned his head towards her, then back away. "Sometimes, what you regret can be what defines you." He paused for a moment, and sighed. "God, that sounded so much less emo before I said it out loud."

"Emo?" She questioned the unfamiliar word.

"Really old earth term." He shook his head. "Thanks for the pep talk, but I doubt this is something I'll be getting over anytime soon. So if you'll excuse me, I have a few dozen holographic Krogan to brutally take out."

He activated his omni-tool, activating the holograms again and stepped back onto the range. Tali took that as a sign to leave and turned to go to take the elevator. She felt like they had a good talk but no progress had been made. She wasn't sure that he wanted to make any progress- or why she wanted to help him make it.

She also didn't know why she kept getting these odd feelings around him. It was like she'd met him before- or else someone a lot like him.

**^You know, I am partially offended with how little you knew me at this point. Seriously, 'in the zone.'? We don't live in the nineties. And the words 'it takes a century' is a metaphor.^**

**T117: Just wait- it'll get worse.**

**)Yeah, thanks a lot.(**

**(Raise your hand if you actually died in the last story. I keep getting the short end of the stick everywhere you look.)**

**)...( *Wordlessly points to his face.**

**(Yeah, I know, it sucks, we're supposed to look like Trebor.)**

**^Oh, shit, you got burned.^**

**~Alright, I'm here. Star is finally asleep.~**

***Maybe we can actually get something done then.***

**^Alright, lets start with simple stuff thus far. Like how we all plan to abuse Bourne.^**

**(Can I just say that that guy is kinda a dick? Seriously, does he just not get- god, I don't even know where to start with that moron.)**

**)Ugh, I know, right?(**

**^Okay, so I have a question? Can we have Soul Edge in the fic or does it count as a person since it is a living sword?^**

**)...What, are you going to suggest bringing Shao Kahn in next?(**

***Might make Iron look less ugly by comparison.***

**^Well, if we bring in Shao Kahn then we got to bring in Akuma and have them duke it out.^**

**~Ty, you just… Stop talking. You are like a hundred times more attractive when you aren't talking.~**

**^Huh, I just got to answer one more question. This one is straight from Starspike7's inbox. Why you hate quarians?^**

**~Oh, I can answer this one. He doesn't hate quarians. Just Tali.~**

**(Finally! Someone else who understands! I mean, the temptation to just grab a knife and- and do exactly what Bourne just did to me. That is probably going to need stitches.)**

_**)So's this one.(**_

**(Ow! Come on, I liked that kidney!)**

**S7: Hey guys you are making a ton of noise and... What the fuck!? Why would you tell the internet that I hate Tali?**

**^Because it is true.^**

**S7: That isn't something that you tell people. It's like saying that you are gay in Russia. Everyone is going to stone me now.**

**(Hey, blame whatserface- that bitch that stabbed me. And I don't mean Bourne.)**

**~Iron, I'm taking away your ability to talk.~**

**T117: Vetoed/Overruled. **

**(...) )...( *...You're kidding, right?***

**T117: What? Half the funny stuff comes from him. **

**(...I do nothing but insult you people... Except for trying to stab Bourne with his own knife.)**

**)Emphasis on trying. Seriously, I could've countered that strike with my eyes closed.(**

**(Yeah yeah. Does anyone have a bandaid?)**

**^Okay, next question that we have gotten a question/review on and probably a lot of SI writers that are reading this probably want to know. Would you ever consider adding another SI?^**

**S7: It's honestly a coin flip for me. On one hand, it could make for funnier coincidences but at the same time you gotta be caught up to us and we have to like you. Also, we would have to like your story and that is no small feat to get him and me to like your story.**

**(I vote that only if it's a chick.)**

**T117: I ignore Iron's vote and cast my vote as maybe. Like he said, I'm a hard man to impress- At this point, I'm going to say the odds of putting another person in this story are slim to none, but if we did a sequel to UiaWoF/ SaWoF/ Whatever the sequel to Users: Prime is, then I'd at least be willing to consider the option.**

**S7: Well, I agree with Iron. Don't want this becoming a sausage fest. We need a girl. A non-Shepard girl.**

**~Excuse me?~**

**S7: Okay, anyone that can impress me and Trebor. And just as an example of how much of a toss in the air I am. I hated Mass Vexations but like Stuck in a World of Fiction.**

**T117: I don't read many SIs other than mine or his, honestly- not unless I'm intrigued by the concept or idea behind it- however you want to word it. **

**)I think the other big criteria- no Mary Sues.(**

**^Well, sorry Bourne but I guess that you are out. Or original you is out.^**

**T117: Yeah, that's why I rebooted the series...that and the writing style, descriptions, ect. Made me want to set my eyes on fire so they'd stop hurting.**

**)There were also some minor plot holes you noticed when you went back- decided to fix those.(**

***And ME3 wasn't out yet when you started writing, so you had to take in the new info.***

**T117: That too.**

**S7: And you're one to talk Ty. You are the same and that is why you are getting a rewrite.**

**^I like to think it's more of a second draft then a rewrite.^**

**T117: Anyway, considering that if we did do a sequel with that, it'd have to come after Prime's finished, the sequel to that is finished- which I don't remember if S7's actually said- and SaWoF. So it's more going on the back burner for now.**

**S7: The sequel is called Users 2: glitched and more like the back most burner. I'm talking this is like a ten burner stove too.**

**T117: Whatever.**

**^Quick shout out to DarthXayri for saying I would win.^**

**)To be completely one hundred percent honest- I'm kinda amazed that the majority have said the opposite. Granted, they may have been biased if they found out about your story/crossover via SiaWoF, but still caught me off guard.(**

**^Yeah, you would think when I have to ability to turn your powers off like a light switch that people would vote me better.^**

**)Uh, reality warping would undo it.(**

**(Oh my god, not this same damn argument again!)  
*I don't even have a perfect memory and I could name all the arguments these two have thrown at each other!***

**^Dude, could just hit you with a format strike and watch you disintegrate.^**

**)Again- reality warping. It corrects crap like that. And how would you be able to aim when I've got you floating around in a singularity?(**

**^Easy, I just turn my armor into something that can't be held by a singularity! Like a Space Marine!^**

**)Wow, and you were saying I was the mary sue.(**

**^Hey, takes one to know one.^**

**(Make it stop!)**

**~Can I take away their abilities to speak?~**

***Please.***

**T117: Yeah, go ahead.**

**S7: Well, without them all we have is a psychopath, a farm girl that is also a genius and a woman that looks like a lesbian.**

**(...What, someone invited Raptor to this shindig?)**

**~You did not just compare me to his Shepard Iron! I am going to fucking kill you!^**

**(What? No, not the farmgirl part. I was talking about the lesbian thing.)**

***She means me, because **_**someone **_**gave me a shaved head.***

**S7: You know, I never realized how similar Raptor and Layla's backgrounds were. Granted very miniscule but they were both technically farm girls.**

**(Yeah, but Raptor's anything but a tech genius, judging by how often Bourne have to rip the containers open.)**

**~That kinda sounded like a sex thing. Like, 'hey baby, want to go into the back room and rip the container open?'~**

**(That sounds more like a euphemism for stabbing or cutting them open or something...Yeah, guess it is a sex thing then if I were doing it.)  
~Oh, when did you become a girl and get hit on enough to know what they sounded like?~**

**(You don't want to know.)**

**T117:...I don't want to know what he's talking about either.**

***Seriously though- what is with the shaved head?***

**T117: What? I gave all three of you shaved heads. Ty has a shaved head too.**

**S7: Well, his hair actually grows. It's shaved because of all of the debris and stuff that got in it at the end of Users.**

**(Also, you didn't originally give Bourne a shaved head in the original version. You added that later.)**

**S7: Okay, well, I am tired so we better wrap this up. 1473I2.**

**(Seriously dude- you are a fucking nerd.)**

**T117:...So am I, I just hide it slightly better. Anyways, Sayonara.**


	10. Hero Up

**Ty:**

I tried to step back but something was holding me in place. Iron was marching intently at me and had a red glow to his body. I activated my omni-tool and fired a cryoblast at him. It hit but the ice just fell off him as it formed. His smile made it as clear that he was insane as his laughter did.

"You're stubborn Mr. "User", I'll give you that. But then again so was Bourne. And you don't have _Hero_ to save you like he did."

I fired off an incineration blast that proved just as ineffective. "I don't need a hero. I am my own."

He laughed and threw up his hand, sending a shockwave to cascade towards me. I only barely was able to get out of the way. He towered over me as he charged to where I was, grabbing me and holding me in front of him. "Really? Because it looks to me like the so called god is about to be killed by the so called- what was it you said? Fuckface?"

I shoved my hand into his chest and released the matrix code to cover his body and I made sure it would hurt as it did. "How do you like that fuckface?"

He smiled as it started to cover his face. "I shared a skull with Bourne. This is relaxing compared to that." The code exploded outwards as he released his grip on my armor, causing me to fly back onto the ground. "You, on the other hand, are about to learn the real meaning of pain."

Something began to hurt in my chest and the zero felt red hot, "Fuck you."

"Don't worry, your mother already took care of that." He said with another maniacal laugh. "But you on the other hand-" he held out his hand, and part of the aura surrounding him condensed into a shotgun. "Won't be able to pick up anyone besides a Zombie when I'm done with you."

The zero fired out and blew him backwards. It tore open causing me more pain than Iron ever could and out stepped none other than Saren. He was calm, cool, and pissed off as ever.

"I really do not appreciate you attacking my body."

Iron blinked a few times as he got to his feet, taking in the Turian. "Wait, you're also stuck in someone's head, but you got stuck in that one? Hah, and I thought I got screwed over ending up with Bourne." He chuckled, but his smile faded as he seemed to recognize Saren. "Hmm, two birds with one stone." He charged at the Spectre

Saren caught him mid jump and threw him over to a wall, "Will you stop. Your barbaric nature just isn't going to get you what you want. No wonder Bourne defeated you. You are too stupid to even know how to fight properly."

He slowly got back to his feet. "Funny, it seemed to work pretty well to kill you. And let's face it, the reason I lost was that I was in your body- it's like that thing's the opposite of a good luck charm." He pointed at his cheek. "At least this time I can look at you without throwing up though."

Saren let a low growl out his throat, "That was not me." He flung his hand off to the side and it caused Iron to fly across the room. "But, let's see what happens if I take you over this time."

"Will you stop doing that? You're not a fucking Jedi!" Iron yelled as he got back to his feet. "And you can't defeat me! I'm Shepard, remember? Its always me that kills you! So lets get things back to normal." He threw a shockwave towards the Spectre, but it dissolved into code as it got within a few feet.

Saren pulled Iron over with his force, "Now, how about I change it up a lot more!" A zero appeared on Iron's chest and Saren began to step into it. And then-

I was awoken by Bourne, who was bent over me and was shaking me a little too much for comfort. "What, I'm up!"

He let go and stood up. "Are you alright? I was coming by to see if you were up, and your pod said your vitals were spiking into the danger zone."

I stretched and sat up, "What? Danger zone?"

He sighed. "I'm not talking about Top Gun. I mean your brain activity, heart rate, breathing, ect, were showing that you were having a panic attack or something." He gestured to the bottom of the pod. "It was enough to disengage the lock and send an alert to everyone nearby."

I cracked my neck and sat up, "Sorry, must have been my dream."

"Sounds more like a nightmare." He muttered. "And while someone else might at this point ask you if you want to talk about it, I think that we have more important things to worry about at the moment."

"Yeah, like how you plan to get a girlfriend with that face."

He responded by smiling. "Well, I was going to wait to do this, but since you're clearly _awake_, we need to figure out how to cover up your _little _slip last night."

I got out of the pod and started for the cafeteria, "Just blame it on fatigue. I had been up for thirty hours straight. I needed rest badly."

He was right on my heels. "They might buy that- if you hadn't already demonstrated your User abilities in front of them several times. Not to mention telling Shepard, and I quote 'I am a lot more powerful than your pathetic Sentinel and Soldier. I am a motherfucking User baby. And that means I can do shit you only read about in the bible.'..., perfect memory has its downsides, but it definitely helps with arguments other times."

I cracked my neck and grabbed a biotic portion, "You have perfect memory?"

"...I don't know whether I'm more irritated at letting that slip when you didn't know, or amazed that you didn't figure that out from Iron's memory. I know we both mentioned it at least a few times."

I ripped the bag open and grabbed the waffles out, "Yeah, I try not to sway into your memories too often." He nodded in agreement at that. "Last time I almost got stuck in them. Plus, your story has a big lack in style points."

He didn't bother to respond to that. "All I'm saying is that A:" He stopped and glanced around, making sure nobody was nearby. He lowered his voice anyway. "If they find out this is all meant to be a video game, and we know exactly what's going to happen, Cecilia won't take it any better than your version did- she'll probably take it worse. So, B- we need to figure out some way to explain your abilities without actually letting them know about that little-"

I cut him off right there, "Nanites!"

He stopped short, and blinked a few times. "That's...actually a really good idea." I could see him considering it, and figuring out how to explain it.

I took a huge bite of the waffle and drank some syrup from the packet that held it. "Chalk one up for the User. Now, are you going to eat so I can mooch off your meal?"

He responded by rolling his eyes. "You realize you grabbed a biotic pack, so there's bound to be plenty left over anyway?"

I looked down at the pack and saw it was two waffles, a packet of pudding, a syrup packet, some bacon, an apple, and one juice. "Hell no, this ain't enough."

He glanced at the packet, then back at me, question clear on his face. It suddenly turned to realization, and his voice said he was irritated with himself. "The "nanites" take up a lot of energy? Or are you just that hungry?"

I took another bite of the waffle, "I am just hungry, I lived on my own for several years and the breakfasts I made in the morning were like four times this size."

He chuckled. "You know, or maybe you don't, I'm genetically engineered so I can eat non-biotic amounts and use the powers normally, but I've never tested how much I can actually eat if I try. Speaking of which-"

I nodded and finished off the rest of my waffles as he grabbed his meal with his biotics. "It's actually pretty good, if you get past the fact that it could possibly be code."

He gave me an irritated look. "Just because I'm somewhat able to convince myself that was the case with your world, I doubt anything will convince me that's the case here." He glanced at his food, and pushed it to the side with a sigh. "But since my appetite is now gone anyway-" he pressed his hands together in front of him. "I need to ask you a favor."

I looked at him and gave my classic smile, "Whatcha need Jason?"

'"_Bourne_. Only two people get to- screw it, you'll just ignore me anyway." He cut himself off with a shake of the head. "I need you to free Hero- and then Iron."

The direct reference to Iron made my blood boil and my heart skip a beat. "Yes to the first one and no to the second one. I am not doing a single thing to that fuckface inside your head."

"Are you aware I deliberately based Iron's face on my own- and that they basically got fused when I ended up here?" He glanced at his hands, turning to look at the palms. "Believe me, I understand why you wouldn't want to go anywhere near that bastard. But if he's going to get out anyway, it might be safer to let him out before he _breaks _out. Last time I was in a coma, so it's not like I was able to get much worse. This time...what if he breaks out during the debrief? Or in the cargo bay? If he takes over then, the best possible outcome is that Wrex or somebody puts a bullet in my head and kills us both before he does any real damage."

I shook my head and stuffed two strips of bacon in my mouth. "It's not what I will bring out of you that I am scared about. It's what it could bring out of me."

He paused, then glanced around again to make sure we were still alone. "Saren? But he's already here. I saw the footage of Shepard meeting with the Council when we got to the Citadel."

"Look Jason, I am willing to awaken Hero. Please don't make me meet him again."

He opened his mouth, but stopped short. He looked back at his hands, and nodded. "I understand." He looked back at me in expectation.

I pulled my hand back and stabbed it into his chest. The matrix code began to flow down again and the names appeared. Focusing on Hero, I opened her file and made the connection zone my apartment again. this time I was sitting in my lazy chair and she was looking around in confusion.

"Hello, Hero. Heh, that rhymed."

Her eyes fell on me. "Who are you? And where are we?" She glanced around the room, obviously trying to place it.

I smiled, "My bachelor pad. Now, Jason wants you awake and I am here to do it."

Her head whipped back to me."Jason?" Her confusion was plain. "But...I... died. To stop Iron. What's going on?"

I gestured to myself, "Well, Jason and I are going through Mass Effect again and sad to say. Iron and you are back."

She looked at me in utter shock, and no words came out of her opened mouth. After a minute or two of recovery, she managed to find her voice. Shock had been replaced by cold determination. "Then we have a lot to catch up on."

"Indeed we do."

I pulled my arm out of Bourne and the matrix code faded. I saw Bourne blinking rapidly, his eyes flickering between his normal blue, and dark purple.

"That was really, really weird." He said after a moment. He glanced at his discarded ration pack and slid it towards me. "Here, knock yourself out. I need to catch her up on what exactly is going on."

He leaned back in his seat, chin down, and closed his eyes. "And Ty...thanks."

I smiled and dug into the meal, "No prob bud."

**Bourne**:

I turned my attention inwards, and a moment later was in the odd void that represented our shared consciousness.

_*So, what did I miss?*_

I turned to see Hero standing there, clad in her purple armor, eyes shining the same color, and I let my relief shine through on my face.

_)I don't even know where to start.( _My thoughts flew wildly, with little organization, and I saw her wince.

I rubbed the back of my neck. _)Sorry. There's just a lot I've had to take in. And its hard to-(_

_*Start with what happened after we took down Iron and Sovereign.*_

It was as good a place to start as any. _)Well, I got knocked out making sure Raptor didn't get hit by a chunk of Reaper, apparently got kidnapped by Cerberus and had got most of my internal organs cybernetically upgraded. Then, the Council ignored us, sent us out to fight Geth, we got overwhelmed, I took a rocket to the back getting out of there, and apparently ended up in a coma.(_

_*You look fine now.*_

I sighed. _)In the same way Raptor was "fine" after meeting a Thresher Maw on the way to get Liara maybe. That guy that freed you, Ty, also got sucked into the game. But in his version, it really was a game.(_

_*What do you mean?*_

_)You, me and Iron-we landed was an alternate reality that corresponded pretty much exactly with a game in my world, because we were causing reality to warp around us. With him...it was basically a cross between Tron and the Matrix. (_

She crossed her arms, her face skeptical. _*Like...code based? Did you say his name was Ty, or Neo?*_

_)Yeah, that's about what I said too. Until he basically "hacked" his armor and turned himself into a bloody Spartan-2!(_

I let the memories slide across my mind, and I saw her skepticism fade to puzzlement. _*So...we got...what, digitized?*_

_)I wish it were that simple. I don't understand how, but basically our worlds crossed over into some weird combination of code and reality. And according to his friend, who's apparently an agent for this universe's AI, if we don't beat Saren again, then my Coma is permanent, and his code ends up in the trash bin.(_

She was silent for a while, and I could feel her looking over my memories. _*We were brought back to keep you from dying?*_

_)I guess so. I wouldn't feel offended if you said you'd have rather I just died.(_

_*You know I'd never even think that.*_

I sighed. "I feel like I don't really "know" anything anymore. I've got someone who reminds me insanely of Raptor in some ways, and is just like Iron in other ways, a guy who's even more immature than me and is infinitely more powerful, and reality may actually be a bunch of code." I reached up to rub my temples. _)I'm getting a headache just thinking about it.( _

_*That might mean-*_

_)I know.(  
*And I think Ty's right. He's more powerful this time. I may not be able to help you contain him this time.*_

_)I know. But as strong as he is, Ty had one good point. He lost.(_

_*Don't get cocky! Especially with _him_.*_

_)I know. But I didn't just ask Ty to bring you out because of Iron.( _I glanced at the floor, and a wall of thick glass appeared out of it. I leaned against it and sighed. _)With so much going on, I just don't think I can handle it without help. This morning, I was getting advice from Tali- from Tali! The person who I stabbed in the gut with her own knife!(_

_*That was Iron, not you.*_

_)It was my fault, even if it wasn't this version of her. It's like...I almost killed her in another world, and yet here I think she's trying to be my friend. I mean, how can I deal with that? I mean, if we win this, all this is going to be over, and I'm going to wake up in Raptor's world again, and she's still going to fear me everytime she sees me. And what about Ashley? I mean, this version isn't really her, so-(_

_*I will help you deal with almost any issues you have, except that one.*_

_)Sorry. I've kinda gotten used to not having anyone else hear my thoughts. What about Garrus? This version already distrusts me- he didn't realize I could hear him talking to Shepard. He said...he said it was like we'd fought, but he couldn't remember it.(_

_*Jason, I'm flattered that you'd want my help. But remember, you managed for a long time without me in your head.*_

_)I'm not so sure managed is the word I'd use. The stakes are a lot higher this time too.(_

_*If you think about it, they really aren't. You're still going up against the same enemies, and the consequences are still saving the galaxy -it's just a different one.*_

I thought that over for a bit. _)At this point, I'm not worried about myself dying. Not as much anyway. I'm more worried about what happens to everyone I leave behind. Raptor, Ashley...they might manage without me, but-(_

_*You've never thought like that before, so don't start now. When Raptor told you that she was going after Kaidan, you went and got him so she could go after Ashley. When Iron jumped into Saren's head, you didn't hesitate for a moment before fighting him. When-*_

_) I get the picture.( _I said tersely.

_^Hello, hello? This thing on?^_

Hero and exchanged a look.

_*Is that who I think it is?*_

_) Oh sweet Jesus, no. NO! You've gotta be kidding me!(_

_^I'm sorry but it is really hard to keep the connection. Just wanted to let you know that I had to leave you alone. Garrus wanted to talk to me and I couldn't say no. So you are just sitting around the table looking asleep.^_

I cut Ty off. )_You need me to come save you from Garrus or what?(_

_*You should probably get up anyway so you aren't just sitting there.*_

_^Jason, I don't need a hero. I can take care of myself. I am just warning you because Kaidan is up there and looking at you funny.^_

_)Just do me a favor and don't __taze __him this time...but if you have to, get him in the crotch.(_

_^Actually, Garrus wanted me to share my schematics for the Omni-tazer. He says it could be useful against the Geth and all. Well, catch you later. I think I am starting to break my teeth from clenching too hard.^_

I glanced at Hero. _)So...(_

The void abruptly vanished, replaced by the inside of my own eyelids, and I popped my eyes open. As Ty had said, Kaidan was giving me an odd look from his console. "You know, a picture would last longer. And as I recall, Shepard already had you take one."

Kaidan just shook his head and looked back at his console. "Shepard just gave you the memo that you are on her ground team for the first drop. I just wanted to see if you actually heard her or just sleeping."

_*Probably not a good idea to go that deep again.*_

_)Agreed.(_

"I heard her." I lied.

_*Did I see that you were made a private now?*_

_)Not due to lack of trying to get Cecilia to change her mind.(_

_*You know that means he outranks you now?*_

_)...meh, I think she likes me more than him anyway.(_

_*Is that why she keeps punching you?*_

_)Raptor and I were best friends, and she hit me constantly. And you've smacked me with my own hand!(_

_*Good point.*_

"Any idea how close we are?" I asked him.

"I think about an hour." He answered without looking up. "You'd have to ask Shepard. I think she's down on the range."

"Thanks." I got up and into the elevator.

_)Say, Hero...did Ty say he was giving Garrus the schematics for the Omni-tazer, or was I just hearing things?(_

_*Don't you have enough ways to stab people already?*_

_)...Yeah, but not with glowing superheated diamond hard blades.(_

She didn't bother replying to that, leaving me in the elevator. I shrugged and brought up my omni-tool. _Okay, time for some...seriously, I have to redownload all my apps here too? Ugh, so much for Solitaire._

**Shepard:**

Shepard finally finished placing on her gauntlet, leaving her in her completed suit of armor. She then stepped over to the weapons she had on her table, she picked the best for range and began placing them on her back. A Naginata II, her Stinger V, A Tsunami III for her assault rifle, and a regular Scimitar I shotgun because she didn't plan to use it.

She decided to start things off with her personal favorite- "Sniping Practice." As she brought it up, she checked the subprogram she'd put in to record whenever someone else ended up using it. She smiled, seeing that someone had not even 10 hours ago.

She brought the video up on her omni-tool, and was surprised to see Bourne standing there. _He pretty much said he didn't even know how to use a Sniper Rifle, so why would he have selected that program? _

Rather than being surprised by the Krogan charging at him from only a few feet away, he just lifted them into the air and took them down with a few shots from his modded pistol. Shepard closed the file, somewhat annoyed. She'd been hoping Garrus or Ashley might have fallen for it, and ended up on their asses.

She'd tried figuring out exactly what model of pistol Bourne used but she couldn't find a description for anything similar. And when she'd opened his locker to take a look at it herself, it hadn't been there- another source of irritation.

She turned back to the range controls and selected something different- an Urban N7 simulation. She hit the button and was in a small settlement that looked a bit like Eden Prime. In front of her was a chest high wall that she immediately ducked behind.

Shepard peaked over the wall and saw a squad of biotic batarians heading straight for her. Pulling up her sniper rifle, she put her crosshairs on the head of the one in the center. With a quick trigger pull she dropped him in an explosion of blood and brain matter.

The other four enemies dodged behind cover and Shepard couldn't get a good angle on any of them. She ducked down and began sneaking down the street behind her cover. Keeping her eyes open she saw a good living container and snuck in, taking up a perch in the window.

The biotics came out of where she'd just been and she was able to get a lock on the biggest one's head. With one shot she dispatched him but was met with a barrage of biotic fire from the remaining three. She switched out her sniper and grabbed her assault rifle.

She popped up out of her roost and opened fire on the biotics. She killed one of them, buying her another couple seconds to toss a grenade in. Thanks to the upgrade that idiot back on Eden Prime had given her, it killed one, and knocked another to the ground. She moved to finish him off, but her shields started taking fire as they spotted her, forcing her to duck down before she could.

Shepard locked a sabotage into her omni-tool, then popped up and fired it at the remaining two. It lit off and Shepard came back up with her rifle. The explosions stunned them, leaving them vulnerable for a critical few seconds. With those seconds, she blasted the last two enemies into oblivion and finished the simulation.

She smiled in satisfaction as she stood up, the holograms fading, then spun around as she heard a low whistle.

"Expert marksman, _and _tech attacks? Glad you're on our side."

"Do you ever make any damn noise when you walk?" She snapped at Bourne, realizing it was the second time he'd gotten the drop on her.

He shrugged and took a few steps away from the wall he'd been leaning against. "Not unless I think about it. Stealth is pretty much built in at this point."

"How long until we hit ground?"

"I was about to come see if you knew." He said with a shrug. "Well, that and I was considering hitting this place myself."

"Were you going to teach yourself how to use a sniper rifle?" She asked sarcastically.

"...meaning?"

"Meaning grow some balls and learn how to use a good weapon", she said with a straight face.

"Can you throw a knife at fifty yards and have it go into someone's skull? When you can, then maybe we'll talk."

She opened her mouth to say something when she was cut off by Joker. "Attention ground crew. Thirty minutes until landing."

"Well, I guess that answers that question." They both said at once before exchanging a surprised look.

"Bourne, do me a favor and stop doing that."

"Your mouth opened after mine did, so that's really your fault."

There was a loud crack outside the hologram area that sounded like electrified metal.

"What the hell was that?...Seriously, again?..." They looked at each other, Bourne seeming somewhat amused, Shepard irritated.

"I've got fifty credits that says that was Ty." Bourne finally said.

Shepard marched toward the door shaking her head. "You know I am not going to take that because it most likely is him."

"I know. I was mostly trying to say something you wouldn't." He answered with a chuckle,, following her.

She stepped outside and saw Ty standing between Wrex and Garrus. They both had red omni-tools that had blades jutting from them, while Ty had electrified wire on his omni-tools, one on each arm. They circled him like sharks and he had a panicked look on his face, obviously he gotten in too deep with them.

Garrus was the first to make a move but Ty quickly met his strike with one of his own blades. It connected with Garrus's blade and shot him back. This distraction gave Wrex the upper hand and he charged in with his own ready to stab Ty in the back.

He was only a couple feet away when a blue stasis field suddenly surrounded him.

Ty turned toward Bourne, "You kill joy."

"Yeah, take it from someone who knows- getting stabbed by a krogan tends to suck." He said, hand in front of him, glowing blue.

Ty put his omni-tools away and walked over to help Garrus up, "If you would have fully observed the fight, you would have noticed the fortification I have activated."

Shepard took a second look as well, and noticed some sort of odd octagonal pattern over Ty's armor. He hit a few buttons on his reactivated, orange, omni-tool, and the pattern dropped, leaving him in his usual state. _That bastard actually cares about safety?_

Bourne sighed. "Dude, you have that weird nanite stuff over you half the time, so it makes it a bit difficult to tell the difference. Would you rather I was willing to stand by and let him inflict what I thought would be a fatal wound?"

Wrex was let out of the stasis and he grabbed Ty around the neck. Squeezing a little too hard he said, "Please, guys like this just won't die. No matter how badly you want them too."

Ty had a look of grief on his face for a moment but it quickly disappeared. "Yeah, can't kill a cockroach, definitely can't kill a User."

Shepard held a hand up to cut off Wrex's reply. "What the hell does that mean, because you keep calling yourself that every five minutes." She gestured to Bourne. "And I heard him say something about nanites, so-"

Ty held up a hand and made the weird energy appear around it, "It's what people who control these nanites are called."

She glanced at Bourne. "Didn't he call you one too?"

"Well, to be fair he had just been in a ship crash." He shrugged. "Same sort of program, different enhancements. In my case, it was to enhance biotic ability and physical state. Along with a few other boring things."

"And him?"

Ty pushed away from Wrex and gave a thumbs up, "Mine was to give someone the ability to control the nanites that gave Bourne his power. I can control them and make them do whatever I want. From rearranging genetic structure to forming armors around me."

"Sounds like Bourne got the short end of the stick." Garrus commented.

The Biotic glared at him a moment before just rolling his eyes. "I'd have thought you figured that out looking at our faces."

"I agree, Ty got the looks", Ashley called from the other end of the room.

Ty shot her a wink, earning himself a death glare from Bourne- the biotic's eyes literally glowed in the somewhat dim light.

"So, if you can rearrange genetic structure, does that mean you can make yourself a biotic?", Shepard inquired.

He shook his head, "No, I can give myself the lymph nodes to enact a biotic attack but I can't actually make myself a biotic and do all the biotic stuff."

"Let's see you do it then", Garrus called out again smiling. "Twenty credits says he's bluffing."

Bourne muttered something under his breath as he brought his hand to his forehead.

"What was that Bourne?"

"I basically said this is a disaster waiting to happen." He replied, looking up at Ty. "And I really hope he just backs down now instead of-Yeah, I know it's not going to happen, so you can all stop looking at me like I'm nuts."

She saw a look of fear cross Ty's face, obviously he was hoping Bourne actually would have said something. "Okay, whatever you do, do not help me at all. Don't pull my hand out of my chest. Don't touch me. You know what, just stay about ten feet away from me."

He grabbed his shirt and lifted it up. He began to press his hand to his chest and close his eyes. Then, a pool of the red energy shot across his chest and he fell to the ground screaming. Something began to glow blue down his neck and shift around.

"Okay, he said not to go near him-" Shepard turned to see Bourne holding his pistol, pointing in that direction. "But just in case something goes wrong..."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I'm done." Ty ripped his hand from his chest, but remained on the ground.

"Darn, and here I was hoping something would go wrong." Bourne said, collapsing his pistol and shoving it into his pocket.

_So that's why it wasn't in his locker. _Shepard looked back to Ty and saw a biotic orb fly past Bourne's head and into the wall behind them. It exploded with a force that she never knew biotics could carry.

She looked back and Ty had blood gushing from his nose. "Thanks buddy, good to know you have faith in me."

Bourne crossed his arms. "Shall I point out the many instances that would back up my skepticism?"

Ty was trying to wipe the blood from his nose but it kept gushing. "Fuck you asshole."

"I've heard worse from a Hanar." He replied. "As much fun as this has been, don't we have a mission to get ready for?"

She came to her senses and nodded, "Yes, everyone get your armor on. Ty, clean up that nose. Ashley, load up Bourne here with the proper gear. He can carry my spare sniper rifle. The rest of you-"

"Uh, bad idea." Bourne cut her off. "If I carry that thing, I'm just going to end up using it as a club."

Shepard hammer fisted Bourne in the teeth and made him step backwards a couple steps. "Your concerns have been noted. Now you carry my gear or I hurt you again. Do I make myself clear, Private Bourne!"

He smiled. "Crystal. You're carrying your own gear."

She smiled back, and swung, only to find her arm intercepted by his own. Her other arm came up, and he grabbed it by the wrist. She smiled and quickly activated her omni-tool sending an overload through his unshielded body.

He went limp and fell to the ground.

"Don't fuck with me Bourne." She said, voice icy cold.

She walked away, knowing voltage like that would stun a human for at least 2 minutes.

"I'd like to point out that what you did technically counts as hurting me, so you're carrying your own gear." She spun around to see that he was already somehow getting back to his feet.

Ty grabbed her sniper rifle from the table and threw it on his back, "God, you two should just get along. Here, I will carry it."

"Thank you Corporal Flynn."

Bourne's jaw literally seemed to unhinge. "Oh, you have got to be-" his eyes seemed to turn purple for a moment as his jaw slammed shut, and he just nodded. They were back to normal a moment later, as was his expressionless face.

"Smart move." Shepard commented, turning to her locker. She'd moved it down here as soon as she got on board. What sort of idiot would leave it up the elevator and away from the others? "Alright, you have just enough time to kiss your ass goodbye, we drop in two."

"Good, that's just enough time for Bourne to get his teeth back in line."

"WIth all due respect _Corporal_ Flynn," Bourne said, putting as much sarcasm into his sentence as possible, "I really wish you'd have died in that ship crash back on Eden Prime."

**(Man, I love this story! Bourne is getting abused left and right!...But then you had to bring Hero in and ruin it.)**

***So, does this mean you'll consider putting us in the sequel?***

**)How much is all of this effecting the sequel anyway, since someone asked?(**

**T117: Well, for starters, there is not going to be a SiaWoF 2. **

**(Huh?)**

**T117: There's Surviving a World of Fiction though, which'll be the sequel to SiaWoF.**

***Smartass.***

**T117: Yep. As for how much this'll affect it...trying to think of how to put it without actual major spoilers.**

**S7: Honestly, it's probably only going to affect Users in that it is showcasing some of the powers that Ty will have and giving everyone more context on Layla. Also, there will be some references in Users 2.**

**T117: I guess I can say it'll be similar for Bourne- kinda exploring aspects of his character that were never really shown in SiaWoF...and maybe giving him one or two new tricks.**

**S7: Oh, I got a question for you Trebor.**

**(No, he doesn't use conditioner.)**

**)Yes, he was serious about being creeped by clowns.(**

**T117: Pricks. What's the question?**

**S7: Have you ever gotten a review that haunts you to this day?**

**T117:...Well, there was this one kinda annoying troll- it wasn't so much the review, as his profile. People like that make me lose faith in humanity.**

**S7: What was it? Was it the guy who was doing that parody?**

**T117: Hold that thought real quick. To Trebor118: .!..(^.^)..!. Your little troll story has nothing on the true better version- the one **_**I **_**wrote. Anyway, no, it was some troll I refuse to name and give him the satisfaction.**

**S7: Ah, bet I could just go back and look up his reviews and guess.**

**T117: I think you'd know it when you saw it.**

**S7: Well then, I probably would. That being said I don't want to sift through 500+ reviews to find it.**

**T117: Heh, I guess there is that. Anyway, this wasn't so much a question that was asked so much as a comment I feel I have to respond too- You were reading this story without reading SiaWoF first? How the- that's going to make things as confusing as heck.**

**S7: Wait, are you talking about Ferret? Dude, he is one of the guys in our multiplayer team.**

**(He's just letting his ego talk. Okay next question is something about if Tali is going to find out their secret…why the heck would we tell you either way?)**

**~Yeah, it's like, do you want them to just tell you how it ends too?~**

**(Tali dies.)**

**)You wish.(**

**(Every morning when I wake up and every night before I go to bed.)**

**^Uh, already happened. Granted Danny had to be a goody two shoes and bring her back.^**

**S7: You know, I would invite him in here to say something but I am afraid we are running out of keyboard symbols.**

**)Yeah...Well, is that all the questions?(**

**S7: I don't know, I asked Trebor one of my own. Got any for me?**

**T117: I'll get back to you on that.**

**S7: Okay then. 1473I2.**

**T117: $ 70n 12 .**

**(...What. The **_**Hell**_**. Was that?)**

**T117: Yeah, doesn't work as well for me as it does for him. I'll just go back to the usual. **

**(Moron.)**

**T117: Saynora. **


	11. Digital Swag- I mean Sway!

**Bourne:**

When I was sure nobody was watching me, I put a hand to my head, feeling the beginnings of a headache coming on.

_*You know, you seem to call Ty an idiot a lot, but I haven't seen him disobey a direct order from-*_

_)Yeah, after he rushed on ahead and took on a few dozen Geth solo, he straight up told Shepard not to give him shit for that again, so he's done more than that. Also, will you turn off the bloody Psy Song?! I get it, alright?(_

_*You had to know that daring her to hit you was a bad idea.*_

_)Yeah, except I knew I could block it, then she'd swing again, and I'd block that too... I figured she'd go for a headbut or a kick to the crotch next, so I was prepared for those. I didn't take into account the bloody tazer everyone seems to have around here.( _

I glanced down at my own arms. _)And now I've got zero chance of getting an omni-blade or two from Ty.(_

_*I don't think he'd hold it against you. Give it about a week. Also, you're welcome.*_

_)For what?(_

_*If I hadn't taken over and saved you from saying something else that was stupid Cecelia would probably have taken that sniper rifle and castrated you with it.*_

_^Could you quiet down? I can hear you.^_

_)Hmm, well Cecelia can't, so let me just say I hate you now and forever, and if you try to pull rank on me, I'll slit your throat when you're asleep.(_

_*He's joking. I think.*_

_^One, take a chill pill... scratch that. Take the whole bottle. Two, I would be happy to hook you up with an omni-blade. Not like it's a big deal.^ _

I blocked them both out and went over to my locker, gearing up in record time. Mostly because I was trying not to say how much I hadn't been joking...and I was also trying not to go fanboy asking for the flaming version of the omni-blade.

"Bourne, get your ass in here!" Cecillia yelled at me, and I bit back a response as I got in, seeing that Ty, Tali, and Ashley were already seated and ready to go.

_*What was it Raptor said? You'd make a great soldier if you could learn to shut your damn mouth? Maybe go with that advice with her.*_

_^He's like deadpool. The Merc with a Mouth.^_

_)Hero, if you could block Iron out, please see if you can do that to him. It's bad enough having to ignore his real voice. If I have to start ignoring it in my head...also, how the fuck did you end up with this weird link anyway?(_

_^I don't know. I was just sitting there across from you and I could hear you in the back of my skull. I tried putting an entire metal floor in the way but it didn't work. And if you could block it both ways I would be very happy. It hurts my feelings you are talking about me behind my back but at least I can pretend it's not happening if I can't hear it... or think it... fuck I don't know. Just block it both ways please^_

I put a hand to my forehead, my start of a headache having bloomed into a full blown one. _)And quickly.(_

_*Hang on... Also, Bourne, shouldn't you get those restraints-*_

"Dropping in 5, 4, 3, 2,-"  
_)Oh fuck my life.( _I put up a barrier as we started falling, but ended up eagle spread on the ceiling.

After what felt like ages, the gravity shifted and I slammed face first onto the floor. _)Argh, I hate this fucking Tank! I thought I was done doing that after it shot through the conduit and embedded itself in the bloody Citadel!(_

_*Alright, hang on, let me see if I can block him out. No promises.*_

I slowly got back to my feet. "I'll take the guns."

Ty was already in the seat and staring at the console, "Uh, yeah, I don't want to just hit random buttons. I only drove this thing."

_*Uh oh.*_

_)What do you mean, 'Uh oh''?(_

"Alright, Bourne, you get guns- and make sure you actually have your seatbelt on this time." Cecelia said, a bit amused.

I forced a smile. "It's way more fun dropping without them." Ty slid out of the seat, and I took over, strapping myself in before taking a look at the controls. It looked the exact same.

_*When I was blocking Iron out for you, it was because of...I won't bore you with the details, but basically it only worked because it was in the same body.*_

_)Shit.(_

_^God, your universe has some weird rules.^_

_)This coming from the man who can literally turn himself into Master Chief, who had a friend who could turn a water gun into a bazooka, and a third guy who used the Mako like a giant transformer!(_

_*Oh, wait, I get how to do it now.*_

Ty only got out half a sentence before it was cut off. _*There. Weak, but it means unless we both want him in here, and he does too, he can't hear us.*_

_)...and you couldn't have done that before making me think I'd be sharing a brain with him for the next several weeks and almost giving me a heart attack!?(_

I saw motion on the display for the guns, and turned them to face the gunship currently moving overhead. _Well, at least these guys give me someone to take it out on._

_*There is one other minor thing.*_

_)Which is?(_

A siege pulse impacted nearby, and I opened fire.

_*It can wait. Just focus on killing things.*_

_)That, I can do.(_

I didn't really focus on where we were driving, more just paying attention to the Geth and making sure they died.

As I was mowing down a pair of rocket troopers, it occurred to me that I hadn't been really jostled around in my restraints even once this entire trip, and I glanced up at the driver's compartment.

_Wait, so Cecelia is actually a __good __driver?...I think __that __may actually be the oddest thing that's happened to me in the past few weeks...)No offense Hero.(_

She didn't deign to reply to that.

Shepard hit a few button and looked ahead, "Five-hundred meters to target."

I swiveled the guns forward and saw the site, along with the three turrets Tali had let at me last time. I opened fire, trying to take at least one of them down, but Shepard swerved into the side passage before I could. I made do taking down the solitary one that was there and then the multitude of geth waiting for us.

"You know, I hate this tank, but I really love the rockets." I commented as I took down a group of them. "And-" I mowed down another two, and checked the radar. "I think that should be all of them. Unless there's any in the buildings."

I glanced back at Ty who had a crazy look in his eye, "God, did anyone else feel that wave?"

_*You know what he's talking about?*_

_)No clue.(_

"Ty, Bourne, you stay here and guard our flanks." Cecelia said, getting up from her seat. "Corporal, you're in charge. Don't screw it up."

A smile crossed Ty's face but it wasn't his usual one. It was like something was changing right in front of him and he loved it. He even stayed quiet, which was a bit worrying.

I took it as a bad sign that my headache suddenly got a little worse.

I waited until Shepard, Tali, and Ashley were gone, then I double checked to make sure the comm channel wasn't open. "Okay, what are you talking about?"

Ty stood up and dropped into the driver's seat, "I don't know, but it feels great. It's like I just had an energy drink with no crash."

"Yeah, good for you. Meanwhile, I'm now officially the lowest ranking person here, I've got the knowledge that my least favorite person is about to make a reappearance, and my head feels ready to split open like a ripe watermelon!"

_*Then you're really not going to like what I have to tell you.*_

I put a hand up to forestall Ty's response, my other hand going to my forehead. _)What?(_

_*Back when I took over your body, something felt off about the biotics.*_

I looked at Ty. "Back at Chora's den, didn't Danny say something about how sometimes it'd be more like your world, and other times more like mine?"

_*You think it has something to do with-*_

_)Well there's also the fact I got electrocuted, but it could be either thing.(_

"I think it's the universal sway. It's leaning toward me."

"Yeah, I think so...also, since there's no witness right now-" I activated my omni-tool, and held my arm out towards him. "Any chance you give me that incendiary blade?"

He reached over and without looking flicked my omni-tool. It lit up and changed to red, then fire began to circle the ring until it got bigger and several fiery blades shot out the side. They began to spin, rather than remaining stationary, and I had to admit it was cooler than anything in the game. More for slashing than stabbing- but I already had more than enough knives for that anyway.

"How about a badass flaming buzzsaw?",He asked rhetorically, sounding more insane than before.

I looked at him, the buzzsaw not quiiiite lined up with his neck, but in that general area if my hand shot forward quickly enough. "Are you feeling alright? Because you're kinda talking like you're the one that got tazed."

Ty looked over and smiled, "I can feel all the data in this entire map Jason. Even Liara. I could teleport us their right now and have the mission over with. Can't do it though, Shepard would ask how nanites could do that. But, I know how to have fun with the battlemaster at the top of the elevator."

I gestured to my new favorite omnitool app. "Oh, I can think of a few ways myself. And I already called dibs on killing him."

His ear moved a little and then something in his look changed, "You wouldn't stand a chance. You can't use biotic charge or singularity."

_*...I think he's right. I was going to tell you before, but I figured you were busy with the Geth.*_

I grimaced. "Some sort of balancing system? Like how my reality warping shorts out your armor more quickly?"

He nodded but stayed silent.

_*Let him back you up on that one.*_

_)I handled myself quite well long before I could charge.(_

_*Last time, a singularity was the only reason he didn't blow your head off- and you still ended up in a coma!*_

_)I was an idiot and didn't know quite what he could heal from. This time-(_

_*This time, you're going to have backup, and you're going to stay on your feet...or would you rather listen to Justin Beiber until we get there?*_

"So, your plan for the Krogan?"

Ty laughed, "Hahahehehe, You will see when we get there. But just to be sure, you might want to turn your mag boots on once we get on the elevator."

"Great. And here I thought I might have a mission for once where I didn't want to puke from machinery shaking me around."

_^Hero, want out of Bourne's head?^_

_)I thought you just said we __both_ _had to want him in here?(_

_*Must have to do with the biotics being messed with.* _

_^Nope, somebody wanted me in here. That, or she tried to get into my head.^_

_*What exactly did you mean by-*_

Cecelia's voice cut off Hero's. "Alright, the gates are open. Moving to secure the other building."

I glanced at the monitor, and saw gates lowering as the group moved into the other building. "Tali, I want to see your skills in action. Think you can get this one open?"

I looked over at Ty. "Uh, isn't that the gate that-" It slid open a moment later. "The turrets are behind?" _)Oh come on, that's the second time Tali's done that!(_

Ty slapped his hand on my console and green electronic veins crossed over it. "Fire now!"

I took him at his word and launched a rocket at the middle turret. It fired off and split into three rockets that targeted each of the turrets respectively. Ty pulled his hand away and sat back in his chair.

"That was close."

"...yeah, last time this happened, the Mako was literally on fire, and I was about 20 seconds from getting blown the hell up. That wasn't even midrange."

Cecelia's voice came over the com. "Nice work with those turrets Bourne."

"Uh...thanks?"

"...It was actually Ty, wasn't it?"

Ty pulled up his comm, "I just changed the missile, Bourne targeted the turrets."

"It looked more like they had heat seeking." She said as she walked out of the building back towards us.

I looked at Ty and shrugged, hoping he'd know what to say.

_*We both did it Commander.*_

"We both did it Commander." I echoed Hero.

"God, you sound like such a total pussy when you put it like that." She said as she climbed in and up to the driver's seat.

_)...you know, it's really scary that Iron probably could have suggested something that would have worked.(_

_*Do you really believe that?*_

_)I have no idea. That's the even scarier part.(_

The mako started moving again, and I turned my attention back to the guns. We hit a bump at the first tunnel gate when the colossus and three armatures caught us right in the open.

"Ty, are the missiles still-"

"Nope, too much concentration to keep them that way. Need to focus on other things. Can't be distracted with petty things such as ammunition."

"Yeah, I figured as much." I said, firing a missile while letting the machine gun cool down. It caused the Colossus to stumble slightly, and I took the advantage to fire at its head. I saw the shields holding, but its inability to see hindered it, and its next pulse was nowhere near us. My rocket, on the other hand, blew its head clean off.

_^Let's see, her file is just trapped inside of his so I could... is this still on? Shit-^_

I responded by blasting the sound of nails on a chalkboard directly into his brain, and blasting away an amature with another rocket. In response, he began blaring the Hamster Dance back at me.

_)Touche(_

Cecelia was definitely making it easier for me to aim than Raptor. She'd stay stationary until they launched their pulses at us, then hit the jets and let them go under us. Whereas Raptor tended to just swerve all over the place and I had to rely more on luck.

_*Will you idiots stop it?*_

_^But I like this song. It has a synthesizer play scheme that matches a lot of the code here.^_

_)...( *...*_

_^It's a User thing.^_

_)Tell you what. If we somehow manage to avoid being stabbed, shot, or burnt to a crisp during this mission, I"ll gladly let you do all that all day afterwards. Until then, this is making it really hard to aim, and I'd rather not get blown up before I make them blow up!(_

_^Okay, it just will take me longer to exchange data and transf... forget it. I was just thinking on how to extract files and... shutting up.^_

I imagined the last rocket trooper had Ty's face as I filled it full of holes.

**Ty:**

I was running countless possibilities through my mind. Even in my universe, I never had this kind of power. Some things I could never have done in my universe came easy now. Like, the rockets that I transformed. Anything was possible, and that meant I was in full control of the ground.

Still, it was hard to decide what I could do and couldn't. Sure I showed Shepard that I could manipulate living tissue and machines but that was it. If I did anything else, she might say that there was no way nanites could do that.

I was pulled from my calculations as the Mako came to a stop and Shepard turned to us. "Okay, we need to walk from here. Looks like the dig site is about a quarter-click up the ridge."  
"And chances are, the Geth are going to be waiting for us." Ashley added.

I placed my hand on the hatch and opened it without typing a code. Now I was in a hurry; if the sway moved from my favor before the end of this mission, I might not be able to let Bourne in on the news about Hero.

"Williams, you and are going to hang back with our sniper rifles. Ty, do you have any armor for mid or short range?"

The same feeling I had after I climbed out of Saren was coming over me. "Why would I do that? It would take too much concentration."

"Didn't seem to bother you back on Eden Prime." Ashley commented.

"How would you even know?" Jason commented, assault rifle cradled in his arms. "Did he undo that memory thing when I wasn't around?"

I noticed what Bourne just said, "Yes, how?"

"Can you morph your armor, or am I sending Bourne out in front?" Cecilia interrupted impatiently.

I snapped and put the Inferno armor on from Mass Effect 2, "This will burn enemies that get too close."

Bourne's voice was suddenly buzzing at the back of my skull. _)Doesn't that thing just increase running speed and power damage?(_

_^Not with the adjustments I made.^_

"Then he better go ahead of me." He said aloud. "My biotics are a little...off at the moment. Probably from getting shocked earlier."

Cecelia laughed, "Yeah, right."

"No, I'm serious. The...nanites that enhance my abilities got a little...it boils down to me losing a couple techniques- mainly the one I use to get in close, and singularity."

I decided to get out and start ahead without them. So many things were buzzing in my mind that I was almost too distracted to feel something in the back of my skull again. It was strange but then I knew it was Hero.

_*Didn't she say not to go ahead without her?*_

_^Too many variables and I don't know how much longer I will be able to ascertain with this level of control.^ _I walked through the crevice and started up the hill.

_)Do you even know what the word ascertain means? Because I think you're using it wrong. Also, I have to agree with Hero on not rushing in without the rest of- Okay, she's having me and Tali go in behind you now anyway.(_

A sniper shot flew by my head and I jumped into cover _^Ascertain: To find out definitely. And I am trying to find out how far this level of control can go.^ _

_)Why? Because unless you can turn that Armature into a drone or something-(_

I made sure that I wasn't in sight of the crew and jammed my hand into the rock face. I quickly manipulated it to a glitch and pulled myself in. I quickly formed another one under the Geth that had the sniper tower and popped up underneath it. After that, it only took a quick yank to its central wire to put it out of commission.

_^I just found out that I can create the teleporting glitches with my own free will when in this state.^_

_)Okay, then- ah shit( _His 'voice' cut off suddenly and I heard the sounds of gunfire from back the way I'd come

I grabbed the Lancer III off my back and aimed it in the direction of the Mako. The Geth were coming upon the team from the small valley that was between us.

I aimed carefully and took the Geth shields down just enough that they wouldn't know that I was hiding in their sniper post and Shepard and Ashley could one-shot them at any time.

_)Sorry, one of them got a little too close- but I have to say, this omni-buzzsaw kicks all kinds of ass. Hah, no more legs for this one.(_

_*Maybe you should both focus on the fighting? Because if one of you gets killed because you couldn't tune out the conversation-*_

_)No complaints from me.( _

_^Hero, I am right now in a state of higher thinking. I can divert focus to multiple tasks. Exactly, thirty-three percent of my brain is focused on shooting. Two percent on this talk we are having, fifty-five percent on making sure that everything is going correctly, and the last ten percent is running trial and errors for if I was to remove you from Bourne's head.^_

I pulled out my omni-tazers and pulled an Assassin's Creed on a geth Destroyer.

_*What was that last one?*_

_)Not everyone here is as good as multitasking!( _A few distinct shotgun blasts followed his words. _)Especially at close quarters while his brain feels like it's about to explode!(_

I looked over at the team and then ran the code for the primary geth in this level. _^Relax, that was the last of them. Now, we just hike up to the armature and take it down with extreme prejudice.^_

_)You're kidding, right? These little ones for some reason are taking at least 4 shots to take down their bloody shields, let alone the units themselves. And you think a big one is going to be easy?(_

_^Only if I get inside it and rip it apart from the inside out.^ _I finished it at that and met up with Shepard as she began walking up the hill.

"You okay Ty? You seem kind of... on."

_)Sure, ask the one that _didn't _take a shotgun blast at point blank range.( _ He projected to me, walking up behind her.

I raised an eyebrow to Shepard, "I believe that the nanites that you destroyed or damaged in Bourne have retreated to mine for repair. Therefore, I am working at a major reaction spike."

She smacked me in the back of the head as she walked past me. "English."

"I am doing better, cause Bourne is doing worse."

"Hey, everyone has off days!" He interjected, then clutched at his forehead.

I walked on to Shepard as she came to the excavation site. Just like in the cutscenes, a geth hopper dropped down in front of us and then leaped out of the way as the armature fell. Shepard, Ashley, Tali, and Bourne all ran to the conveniently placed boxes while I dodged over behind one of the nearby pillars.

"Shepard, I got a plan, but you need to take care of the geth troops before I can do it!" I barked over the comm.

Shepard blasted one with her sniper, "Okay, just don't get yourself killed over there! I have a feeling Tweedle Dee would be crushed!"

A glowing blue stalker was pulled from the nearby wall and slammed into the ground. "Only cause he owes me money." Bourne replied, and I saw him lean out of cover long enough to throw a knife at one of the rocket troopers- the only damage inflicted was a mild scratch along the shoulder.

_)Yeah, nanites or not, something's seriously affecting me right now. I should have been able to easily send that right into its head._

_*It could just as easily be Iron as it is him.*_

_)If it was, it'd also explain why I'm more ticked about it than I'd have thought I'd be.(_

Shepard blasted the geth and that just left the hoppers to deal with. My time was coming up quick so I began preparing. I grabbed two grenades from my belt and checked them for explosive damage II. They both had it so I placed them on my from pockets to make it easier to grab them. Next I snatched Shepard's spare sniper rifle off my back and held it by the barrel. _God, I know she is going to kill me._

I gave a shout of joy as she bullseyed the last geth hopper and I sprang into action. I charged the Armature straight on and it locked on me immediately. With a quick roll to the side I got out of its sights so it had to reposition.

It brought its head in low and activated it's machine gun but it was too late. I smashed the sniper rifle into the side of it's head. The blow screwed up its optics so I could grab onto the neck. Taking ahold of its central neck wire I yanked it out and threw the two grenades down it.

I dodged away and turned to everyone, making sure to give my smile before hitting the detonator and blowing the armature up from the inside out. "That was for style points."

"Did I see you hit it with- I told you that if someone else carried that thing, it'd be used as a club." Bourne directed the last bit to Cecelia, standing just outside her punching range.

She began walking toward me but I shook my head, "I honestly wouldn't have thought of it unless Bourne pointed it out."

"With all due respect _Corporal_, that's complete bullshit." His eyes were on Shepard the whole time, and his omni-saw was active.

I decided to take the fall and walked over to Shepard with my hands up. "Fine hit me."

Bourne came in close to see the beating I would get. She raised her fist up to hit me in the face, but immediately turned and gave the shot to Bourne's face instead. He leaped back enough that it missed him by inches.

"You didn't honestly expect me to not see that-" he threw himself to the side as she threw another punch, but it was just a feint and other hand hit him square in the jaw, sending him staggering back.

"He's right. He never would have thought of it unless you pointed it out, Private Bourne."

_)Remember Ty, you have to sleep a lot more than I do. And there's a lot that can happen during that time.(_

_^You know what, I tried to take the shot for you. You came in too close. Plus, I think she likes hitting you more.^_

_*Will you two stop arguing like children every five minutes?! I don't even have a corporeal head and it's still somehow giving me a headache.*_

_^I can fix that. The corporeal head thing.^_

_)At this point in time, bad idea.(_

_*Why?*_

_)__You_ _just snapped at us, and I'm even more pissed off than normal. At this rate, Iron's going to be back completely by the time we get to Liara, if not sooner. And if he pulls him out instead of you-(_

_*If he's able to do that to an Armature, wouldn't now be the best time to go up against Iron? We might be able to put him down now.*_

_)Unless his own reality warping pushes things back into our court and Ty's armor turns back to normal again.(_

We all began walking into the caves, with me leading the way. _^Um, he_'s f_rom your universe remember? Mine is in full swing here.^_

_*Maybe, but how are you going to explain Bourne suddenly having an even uglier version of himself leap out of his head, accompanied by a...did you seriously call me a wet dream, or was Bourne kidding about that?*_

_^011010010010000001100011011000010110111000100000011010110110100101101100011011000010000001100010011101010111010000100000011110010110010101110011^_

_)You know, I was sorta annoyed hearing about your version, because off all the perks like being able to morph armor and guns and shit, but just now I'm not so disappointed because it means I'm not a complete nerd like you guys.(_

_^What?^_

_)You just spit out so many ones and zeros even I couldn't memorize them all. You could've just lied and said no or manned up and said yes.(_

_^No, I didn't. I said I will kill him and sorry but yes, I did call you his wet dream.^_

_*It sounded like binary on our end. And if you do let me out of here, I'll give fair warning now I may have to slap you for that.*_

A few Geth popped out on our way to the elevator but Ashley and Shepard got headshots off on them before they would even make their clicking noises. _^Sorry about that, to be fair, you are more attractive than most of the other Shepard's people have made though.^_

_)More so than Cecelia?(_

_*You know I'm right here Bourne? And I could easily smack you with your own hand?*_

_)Anyway, she made a good point. How are nanites going to explain two whole people appearing out of nowhere?(_

_^If we can sneak away from the group, we can lie and say that Bourne got ahold of his squad from the ship that crashed on Eden Prime and told them to meet us here. Though, we could pull iron out during the collapse and shove him off the side of the catwalk to get buried by rocks.^_

_)It's not a bad suggestion, but she's going to get pissed we didn't tell her- and I can and will say that they contacted you first and you told me, so you'd have hidden it from her too...but if Iron's influencing me this much, we probably should.(_

We stepped on the elevator and I felt the scratching in the back of my skull again_.^Okay, Hero, are you trying to peek inside my head? Cause I will keep blocking you out.^_

_*That isn't me.*_

_^Well, whoever it is I keep sending a bunch of junk data their way when they do so they end up with stuff like that time I caught Shepard looking at Fornax.^_

_)Seriously?...I wonder if-(_

_*You cannot blackmail Raptor, or Cecelia if they happen to have subscriptions.*_

_^You sure countered that pretty fast. As if you were hiding something for all three of you... but in Drell edition.^_

_*Once! __Once __I bought one of those!*_

_)Great, there's yet another image I never needed in my perfect memory. Can we just pull them both out of my head before I go nuts? And maybe rid of this mental link too? It's really distracting, and I feel like it doesn't really add anything to what's going on.(_

_^You're telling me, I only had Drew in my head and he actually talked to me. Didn't have to chat inside my head like this with my eyes opened.^_

_*Drew?*_

_^Hang on, I might be able to transmit you my memories through this link... deleting that one... removing the real world and sent.^_

_)I...I kinda want to know what you removed, but at the same time feel certain I don't want to know.(_

"Bourne, Ty, pull your heads out of your asses and get down here! We're going to see if we can find a way through that energy field down there. I want you scouting the far end of the cave, make sure we don't miss anything."

I ran to keep up with Shepard. _^I just removed what it was like inside Saren's head. You guys shouldn't have to go through what I did.^_

_)Oh. Then, thanks. Having the memories of one lunatic trying to conquer a mind is enough.(_

* * *

**^Best. Chapter. Ever.^**

**)It would be. If it were opposite day.(**

**^Dude, I got to smack an armature with a sniper rifle. Seriously, I thought Spike was joking when he said it.^**

***Wasn't the sniper rifle thing your idea anyway?***

**)I wasn't being serious about using it as a club!(**

**^Yeah, so, Trebor and Spike aren't going to be around today. Mostly because we drugged them. Well, I drugged Spike. I think Bourne just punched Trebor out.^**

**~You used the nyquil right?~**

**^Yep, mixed it in with his liquor.^**

**)Well...I was **_**going **_**to knock Trebor out, but then I considered how much abuse he's put me through as is... I just ended up asking him to not come.(**

**(...That worked?)**

**)I think I surprised him by just asking instead of using violence. He said yes, looked confused, then shrugged and went back to playing MK9…He is really have a hard time with that one fight.(**

**^Huh, you know. Now that I think about it we probably could have just bet Spike that he couldn't do the Raging Demon with Akuma on Hard mode. That would have kept him busy for the next week.^**

**~Then he wouldn't have worked on Users: Prime for a week. Lord knows we can't give him a reason to put off writing or he does.~**

**(Yeah, you know how many chapters of SaWoF Trebor's completed in all this time? Four- well, maybe five by the time this comes out, but whatever..)**

**^Yeah, Spike is at 4 with Users 2. So far, I don't like it.^**

**(Probably because I'm not in it.)**

**^Dude, we have Danny. Your arguement is invalid.^**

**(...We need to have at least one scene with both me and him at once.)**

**)...Only if I'm drunk, KOe'd, or otherwise unable to actually take in that scene.(**

***You could just not be there.***

**)Even better.(**

**^Well, then it would have to be Tali, Cecelia, or me. Which one of us could it be?^**

**~It would be funny to see Danny and Iron chatting it up in front of Cecelia.~**

**(OMG yes.)**

**^I think that we could get the others to work it in at some point.^**

**)If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go make sure I have pepper spray for when all the fans go nuts over that idea.(**

**^Dude, he is still bragging about the fan art someone drew of him. Now, I got a feeling that there is going to be more of him and Iron.^**

**(...Yeah, Trebor hasn't gotten any fan art.)**

**T117:...Yet.**

**(Keep dreaming pal, keep dreaming.)**

**^Why don't we do a contest? You know, whoever draws the best picture of Bourne, the gang and me or just Bourne and me gets… something? What should we offer the winner? How about a $3 code for xbox live money?^**

**)Meh, worth a shot. Worse thing that'll happen is nobody submits anything and we keep the money we'd have spent.(**

**(We meaning Trebor and Spike?)**

**)Yep.(**

**^Actually, Spike has a buddy that gives him $3 codes once a week so it cost nothing for everybody.^**

**(Oh sure, take all the fun out of it.)**

**T117: We'll have details about next chapter.**

**^Wait, why are you here? Shouldn't you be playing MK9^**

**T117: I booted Bourne off the computer for a sec. Wanted to see if I could find any tips on how to beat that guy.**

**^Lame.^**

**T117: What? It's a legitimate strategy!**

**^Really, I thought that you would have gone with the Yu-gi-oh abridged "Ignore me!" quote.^**

**)He's more of an RvB guy.(**

**^Then, what is with the Yu-gi-oh fanfic?^**

**)...You mean the one he hasn't touched in ages?(**

**T117: I'm ****working ****on it.**

**(Meaning he's trying to decide if he can figure out a way to somehow give the guy a deck more like the one he actually has now, or if he just needs to start over and rewrite the whole story.)**

***Again.***

**T117: I've been busy lately, give me a break.**

**^Why not have him get his deck stolen and build a new one?^**

**T117:...Uh…Because it's still somewhat…I can't just...Screw it, I might just end up using that idea.**

**(Might? It's the only good idea you've had about it for ages.)**

**T117: Yeah, but the earlier chapters do kinda need some work...I'll just do a quick rewrite/update and then work on the next one. If/when I get time.**

**^I expect at least a shout out since you are using my idea.^**

**(Yeah, he's totally going to shout out to a fictional character in a story he's co-writing.)**

**)...You do realize the genius named one of the characters David **_**Bourne, **_**right?(**

**~The genius that also couldn't figure out a name for you and relied on someone else's.~**

**)Given that he was giving me a fake name to use, and I've got amnesia, it makes perfect sense.(**

***Not really.* (No it doesn't.)**

**)Oh, like your names are any better.(**

**T117: I do that in real life, hence it makes perfect sense...sorta.**

**)...I think I liked myself better before I started actually talking to you.(**

**~It's okay Bourne, you still have Ashley for another week after this.~**

**)...What's **_**that **_**supposed to mean?(**

**^Oh, um, well then. How about them winter olympics?^**

**~Yeah, they sure are great.~**

**)...You sent Spike the first chapter of SaWoF to look over, didn't you.(**

**T117: First five actually.**

**^Can't wait to see the bobsledding.^**

**~Yeah, as long as one of the crew doesn't screw up.~**

**)I hate all of you.(**

**(Oh, sure, **_**you **_**can say it, but when I say it I'm a psycho.)**

**^Oh, do you remember last year when that guy missed the sled?^**

**~Yeah, that sure did make me laugh. But then I felt bad for the guy because he missed his only chance.~**

**)Yeah...kinda like Ty and the escape pods.(**

**(Huh? What do you...oh, yeah, that was awesome.)**

**^... Hehehe, what?^**

**~Oh, I forgot we were keeping that from you.~**

**^Oh, I probably just get some deadspace armor and fly through space and catch a pod right?^**

**~Cough.~**

**^Right?!^**

**~1473I2.~**

**(Sayon- oww!)**

**)That's **_**my **_**job.(**

**(Jackass.)**

**)Sayonara.(**


	12. Under the Knife

**Bourne**

I was annoyed to find myself breathing a little harder as I sprinted to catch up to the others; I should have been able to do so with no more effort than walking. Although the possibility of having my head back to myself was a good one, I hoped reality would swing back to me before too long. _Otherwise, I'm going to get a lot more than just a knife in the side._

I nearly ran right into Cecelia's back as she stopped short in front of the elevator, waiting for it to open. I managed to stop myself, though if she'd turned around at that moment she probably would have punched me for being too close.

I backed away hurriedly, though she didn't seem to have noticed. My footsteps were still whisper quiet, one of the few things that hadn't gone haywire. Ty walked up after the fact and just cracked his neck. He looked like he was relaxed, just another thing I didn't understand about him. I could be calm when being fired at, but not when we were talking about possibly unleashing someone like Iron.

_^Hey, so if I remember right. Last time Tali did the whole drill thing right?^_

_)Yeah, but that was because nobody else in the group could do anything more technical than modding a gun. Hell, I had to ask Garrus to finish the knife system for me after I got tired of putting dents in the walls. Cecelia should be able to take care of it.(_

_^Good, then maybe Tali won't be the whiny bitch from your universe.^_

_)How exactly- she got stabbed in the damn gut!(_

He was spared my wrath as this universe's version of Shepard turned and motioned us into the elevator.

_*Yeah, as far as being a badass goes, I think Cecelia's got Raptor beat. Then again, she's also a royal bitch who hasn't gone through anything like she did. Between losing her family, and then her entire unit on Akuze...not to mention having to deal with Bourne.*_

_)Did you say all that just so you could tack that onto the end?(_

_*No, but I couldn't let the opportunity go to waste.*_

_)Argh, why can't this thing move any faster? The sooner you're both of out of my head, the better!(_

_^Good, news I just figured out what that scratching was.^_

_)What is it?(_

_^Turns out, whenever someone thinks about me they make a connection and I can follow it back to find out what they are thinking.^_

_)Great, the literal version of 'were your ears burning?' Let's just get away ASAP so we can get you both out of my head. And is there any chance you can turn medigel into some freakin aspirin? It feels like I just got the Cipher all over again, and then someone decided to juggle chainsaws right in my ear canal.(_

_^You will never believe who is thinking of me... Well, us.^_

_)There's only three other people here dude. Unless you're getting feedback from Hero.(_

_^No, Ashley is comparing how our asses look in armor. The fuck is wrong with her, right?^_

_)...you do know that...ugh, why do I get the feeling that even if I did have something to deal with this headache, my resistance to drugs would be the one thing working perfectly? Also, I don't care if she thinks you're the hottest dude on the planet. If she tries to flirt with you and you let her-( _I flicked a knife into my hand, and then stored it with another flick. The elevator suddenly came to a halt, and we walked out to find two rocket drones waiting for us. I warped the nearer one, but it barely seemed to scratch it. Cecelia put it down a moment later, and we piled into the second elevator.

_^Well, excuse me if I want to have some fun with a girl. Not like I will do anything with her. It holds me back to have a relationship.^_

_)Good.(_

_*So who does she think has the better-*_

_)Do __**not **__finish that sentence.(_

_*Oh come on, you were thinking it too. I can read any of your thoughts, remember? Not just the ones you can throw out to him.*_

_^Ahem, Bourne has the better ass but I am the better looking.^_

The elevator suddenly started shaking as it slowed down.

"Alright, this thing's not going any further. Everyone off." Cecillia ordered, jumping down.

I decided to lower myself down with my biotics; it wasn't that far of a drop, but I wasn't my usual self. It also gave me an excuse not to respond to Ty.

"There's someone in there. Bourne, Ty, go check out the far end of the cave. The rest of us will talk to her."

I nodded in agreement. "Can I just point out Commander-"

"Don't make me put you on the ground again Bourne."

"All I was going to say is that it looks like she's been in there for a while, so your usual methods might just cause her to panic. And if that's Dr. Tsoni, then-"

"You really do seem to turn into the good cop." She said with a hint of a smile. "Get going."

I wanted to press her to say yes, but not as much as I wanted to stay standing- and get my head back to myself.

_)Alright, let's go 'meet up with my squad.' But I think we need a better explanation, considering that we only would have known we'd be here in this dig site a little while ago. No way they'd have been able to get here on such short notice, or without one of them noticing.(_

_^Wait, I won't do it unless I am promised one thing.^_

_*He's got a point though. The only explanations I can think of involve me already having been here, but-*_

_)I can't believe I'm even considering this but...Ty, could you implant false memories into Liara's head? Like maybe Hero was hired for security or something?(_

_*And then you could claim we'd teamed up on a few jobs before?*_

_^Sure, but Hero has to promise not to slap me. And am I letting Iron out too? Because you said that earlier and never confirmed my plan to pull him out as it's collapsing.^_

_*Fine. But I say we pull Iron now. If your supercharge fades before we get out, we might not have time to do it.*_

_)And being buried alive is too good for that bastard anyway...also, we do have one other minor consideration.(_

_*Which is?*_

_)...well, let's be honest here, how many other people do you know named Hero?(_

_^How about something simple like Elizabeth or Alice or my personal favorite Venus?^_

_*I'm not changing my name. I'll have to go with something other than Shepard as a last name, but-*_

_)You sure? She's going to be suspicious enough when you appear out of nowhere. If she thinks you're giving her a fake name-(_

_*Right. Because it's not like I'd hesitate with the name I've had for my entire life. And she's good, but she's not the only one of us who's an N7.*_

_)And for a last name?(_

_^Swan, like from Pirates of the Caribbean!^_

_)Hero Swan?(_

_^Let's say Hero is your nickname. Let's face it, if Cecelia hears that's your name she will laugh at you and leave you on the bank by the lava.^ _

_*But...Okay, you have a point. I'll go with...Hannah. That was my mother's name, and we've been confused before, so it won't throw me for a loop if someone calls me that. Hannah "Hero" Swan.*_

_^Doesn't that mean Cecelia's mom is also named Hannah?^_

_)She's earthborne. From what I understand, she never knew her family. And it's a common enough name she'd think it was a coincidence even if that were the case- unlike Hero.(_

_*Glad that's settled. Ty- do your thing.*_

_^OKAY!^_

Ty drove his hand into my chest and my brain instantly felt like it was on fire, being pulled in every direction at once. The pain was more than anything I'd ever felt before- worse than the Beacon being burned into my head, worse than the Cipher, worse than both combined.

My vision split several ways and I felt like I was seeing out of three sets of eyes. To say it was disorienting would be an understatement. As my vision cleared, I looked to my right and saw Hero on her hands and knees throwing up.

I turned to my left, and felt a smile touch my lips. Iron was out cold, in a very undignified position. All he needed to complete the image was a dick drawn on his forehead with a sharpie.

I glanced over at Ty, who was looking at Iron in a way that made it clear he knew just how dangerous he was. "Take that fuckface."

"Seriously dude, a little photoshop and you wouldn't be able to tell the difference between our faces." I shook my head, and saw something nearby that made me smile. I walked over to the hunk of metal sheeting, and lifted it into the air with my biotics. It was still difficult, but I had very good motivation. I moved it into position over Iron, then bent it so it would form an arch over him.

I slammed it into the rocky ground with as much force as I could muster, and Ty put his hands up to cover his eyes from the shards of rock that were knocked loose.

"That's not going to hold him forever, but it might keep him out of trouble until the mountain buries him." I glanced at Ty. "Unless you can-" a thought hit me, and I smiled. "Can you warp someone else's armor, or just your own?"

"I can manipulate someone else's in this state. Why?"

"Think you can turn his armor into a straight jacket, or a bunch of chains or something?"

"Or we could just shoot him in the head." Hero said, getting to her feet.

I looked back at Ty. "In that case, maybe you could do something to her armor."

"What's wrong with it as is?" She asked, hands on her hips.

"It's completely purple! Kinda goes along with not wanting Cecilia to leave you here."

Her eyes, the same shade, glowed the same way mine could. "I promised not to slap him, but I never said anything about your face."

"Aren't you supposed to be a paragon?" I asked wryly.

Ty nudged my side, "She is still a woman bro and they all have their own standards."

I suddenly realized something, and my head snapped back the way we'd come. "How close do you have to be to alter Liara's memories? Because if she says something that'd imply she was here alone..."

Ty rubbed the back of his head. "Direct contact is necessary for any adjustments."

"Anyone have a plan B for if the first one goes wrong?" Hero asked, checking her gear. "Oh, that's a nice touch. My Locust made it too."

"I got an idea, all we need to do is distract Shepard until I can jump over there and change Liara's memory. Then I can jump back." Ty reported eagerly.

"Okay, but how do we distract her?" I asked. "Saying I found someone? And then introducing "Ms. Swan"?"

"That'd still leave him." Hero said, looking at Iron in distaste.

"Then we make sure she doesn't see him, and this whole place ends up a giant unmarked grave for him."

Cecelia's voice suddenly was in my ear. "Find anything?"

I answered before Ty could, shooting him a look to be quiet. And not in a "stop being annoying way", a "I've got a plan, so don't fuck it up by talking" way. Luckily, he seemed to understand the difference.

"I don't know about Ty, we got a bit separated. But I did find someone else down here."

"Then tell him to back here too unless he likes being buried. These ruins don't look stable, so the sooner we're out of here the better." I glanced at Iron, still out cold, and I couldn't keep a grim smile off my face.

"I'll be sure to pass the message along."

Ty pointed over at the at the tents. "I will go behind the tents so it looks like I am scouring for weapons if they do see me."

I nodded in agreement. "So, Shepard, ready to meet Shepard?"

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a reply."

**Cecelia:**

Cecelia heard someone clearing their throat, and turned to see Bourne approaching, followed by a woman in all purple armor.

"Decided to give up on the stealth?" She commented.

"More that I figured trying to take you by surprise was a bad idea."

She glanced at the woman. "Where's Ty?"

"He went down a side tunnel. I told him you wanted him to head back."

Shepard could tell he was up to something. It was in the way he said that Ty took a side path. "You let Ty go alone?"

"Not so much let him go as I turned around for a minute to check something out more closely, and he was gone when I turned back." He crossed his arms. "Also, since he now outranks me..."

Another smile crossed her lips. He really hated Ty outranking him. "Well, if he finds some way to turn off the shield then I will need to give him a promotion."

To her disappointment, he wasn't even phased by the suggestion. "Take it from a guy who knows- nanites and electricity don't mix. He'd just end up missing an eyebrow if he tried anything with it."

"Why would he worry about electrocution?"

"Let me put it this way- I don't know. The way it works is this: He doesn't question me when I talk about Biotics, I don't question him and his User powers...anymore."

Shepard pulled up her comm and called Ty. "Hey Ty, where are you?"

Ty came in a little staticy. "Just making my way to you. I fell down a pit so I am in the process of climbing out."

"Okay, do you think you could open up the shields with your nanites?"

There was a long pause before he finally answered again. "I don't think so. I can only change things through direct contact. That would mean touching the shields and after what happened with Bourne after you shocked him... I have to say an honest no."

She glanced at Bourne, but he was smart enough to keep any "I told you so" to himself. "Alright. Get back up here so we can figure out plan B."

She turned to Bourne's new friend, "Who are you?"

"Hannah Swan. Security consultant."

Ashley cut in quick. "Didn't Professor T'Soni say that the rest of her team died?"

"We got separated when the Geth attacked. I managed to get out, and met up with Jason here."

"First name basis", Shepard wondered, "This your girlfriend Bourne?"

"He wishes." The woman said with a laugh. "We've worked together on a few assignments- and saved each others asses more than once."

"And by my count, it's eight to seven, my favor."

Shepard and the new woman turned to him at the same time and said. "Shut up Bourne."

He looked from one to the other and sighed. "I can tell already it was a great idea to introduce you."

"Say, Bourne, did I hear her say that _Ty _outranks you now?"

He glared at her, but reluctantly nodded.

"Man, how badly did he screw up for that to happen?" She asked Cecilia, smiling.

"He's just too mouthy to be anything but a grunt. Ty at least has enough of a head on his shoulders to follow orders."

She chuckled. "Tell me about it. Even when I was in charge, he treated anything I said as a suggestion."

"Her, I'm not dumb enough to put in stasis. But you _old friend_, are another story entirely." Bourne said, eyes blazing.

Hannah casually flicked her hand, and he was suddenly the one surrounded by an oddly purple biotic stasis field.

"As I was saying-"

The stasis field suddenly was warped apart, leaving Bourne standing there looking extremely pissed off. "I have had just about enough of-"

Ty's voice cut him off before he did anything else he could live to regret. "Everyone's favorite user is back!"

"Good." Bourne said. "Because while you might be annoying, I at least can understand what goes through your brain."

"Meaning?" Both women asked at once in the same menacing tone.

"Two words. Y Chromosome."

"Wooh, yeah, testosterone! Now, let's go save the sexy lady!" Ty pointed forward and marched past everyone.

"That said, I also half wish I didn't." Bourne added as he followed. From the way he walked slightly quicker than normal, it was obvious he was trying to put distance between himself and the two women. Shepard started before the other woman and followed the boys to one of the laser drills.

"What's this?"

Ty stood up on top of the drill and pointed to the ceiling. "This is the drill, that will pierce the heavens!"

"Then why isn't it aimed up at the sky instead of the wall?" Bourne asked with a chuckle.

Ty slunked down and crossed his arms. "You all just know how to ruin a good movie quote."

"Are you going to stop whining, or do I have to fire this thing myself?" Shepard asked dryly.

He jumped down from the drill and gestured to the control panel, "All yours."

Pushing him out of the way, she stepped up to the control panel and hit her usual succession of buttons. The drill immediately followed her commands and fired off into the wall. It took a couple seconds but the drill finally broke through and she shut it off.

"Well, let's go get the", she held up air quotes, "'sexy lady' as Ty put it."

She pointed toward the hole and everyone moved to it. As she stepped inside, she noticed that they were on an elevator platform. _Luck must be in our favor._

"Is it just me, or is this elevator going faster than the ones on the Citadel or Normandy?" Bourne commented.

"No, it's me", Ty answered.

"So, with the boost you've gotten, you're devoting resources into making this thing go faster?...never thought I'd say this, but I like the way you think."

"Quiet down, we need to be professional around the Professor", Shepard called back to them.

"I doubt she'll really mind, considering how long she's been in there." Hannah commented.

"Did I ask you your opinion? No, then it must have been an order."

"Uh, Hannah, I'd listen to her if I were you." Bourne cautioned.

Ty just yelled out. "Heh, that has to be a double standard for you Jason. 'Everyone listen to her so I can tell her to fuck off when I need to', right?"

"Didn't she tell you to quiet down? As in, shut up?"

"Says the Merc with a Mouth."

Shepard shot Ty her death glare and he immediately shut up just as they arrived at T'Soni's level. "You still there Professor T'Soni?"

" I can see her from here." Bourne said, and she moved her glare to him.

She struggled but managed to turn her head to them, "Yes, I am still here. Now, please, get me out of here."

"Ty?" Cecelia half questioned, half ordered.

Ty shook his head. "Direct contact remember, can't touch shields."

"There's a console nearby." Bourne pointed out, already halfway to it. "Don't suppose you know the off switch?" He asked the Asari.

"That large one there- on the far right."

He looked at the panel for only a moment before hitting a button. The field gone, she dropped a few inches before Bourne caught her with his biotics and lowered her slowly to the ground.

"You alright?" Hannah asked her as the rest of the group approached.

Ty snapped his fingers, "Who cares, we have to move quick. The ceiling is collapsing."

"And how exactly would you know-" Ashley cut herself off at the sudden sound of shifting rock overhead.

"You were saying?" Cecilia said, pretending she hadn't been about to ask the same thing. She hit her com. "Joker, get the Normandy in the air and lock in my signal. Now."

"Roger that Commander. ETA, 8 minutes."

Everyone stepped on the elevator and Ty broke away from the group. "Okay, time to play a game. Can a User do that? First question, can I lift this elevator up so fast that it arrives on the top floor before a single rock hits the ground. Shepard, do you have the correct answer?"

"Will you stop clowning around before we all die?" Hannah said, irritated.

Shepard rolled her eyes at Hannah, "Just humor him. I'm gonna say yes."

Ty snapped and the elevator shot up a little fast for comfort. He snapped again and they were at the top floor. "You are correct, now", he pointed at a Krogan that was by the entrance, "You sir, can a Krogan defeat a User?"

"Not sure what you're talking about, but I suggest you surrender. Or don't, it'll be more fun."

"I can't speak for anyone else here-" Bourne's omni-tool appeared, and suddenly turned into what looked like a spinning buzz saw. "-but I'm going to have to go with the second option."

Ty smiled, "Wrong."

Ty flicked his wrist and everyone's mag boots engaged- except for Liara's, since she had none.. Bourne must've have at least guessed what he was planning, because he grabbed her and threw her over a shoulder with a muttered apology. Then, the Krogan began charging them and in an instant the elevator began spinning around like a marry-go-round from hell. It caused the krogan to stumble and roll with the elevator knocking into one of the pillars that held it on the elevator on it's track.

"Damnit Ty, I said I called dibs on killing any Krogan we found here!" Bourne griped, before wrapping himself and Liara in a thick energy field, the centrifugal forces obviously too strong for him to keep his hold on the doctor normally.

Ty stopped the elevator and pointed to Bourne, "Bonus round, take out the Kro-" Ty was cut off as the Krogan used the same sort of charge that Bourne could and implanted a bowie knife in his back. "-AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

The Krogan lifted Ty up with the knife and laughed. "Guess he got a little too cocky. Next victim."

"Hero, heads up." Bourne said, throwing the asari towards Hannah.

"You? You think you're going to be the hero and beat me?" The Krogan laughed throwing his knife and Ty off to the side and grabbing his shotgun.

"No. I'm going to be the ex-merc who gets revenge." He raised his arm, buzzsaw whirling wildly.

Shepard put her hand out to Bourne and shook her head. "Bourne, you aren't in the right shape to take this guy on. Hell, you couldn't even-"

She stopped short as he charged at the Krogan hard enough to throw him into the wall. "Funny thing about those nanites. One of us goes down-" A biotic cornea surrounded him. "The other gets a little boost."

The Krogan growled and got back to his feet, only for Bourne to fire a few rounds from his pistol. Shepard wouldn't have expected it to make a dent, but it not only took down the Krogan's shields, it also put a hole in the front of his armor, and blood started to flow out of it.

"Bourne... use... Warp!" Ty yelled struggling to his feet.

"I've got a better idea." Hannah said, raising her free hand, glowing purple. A Singularity formed, and the Krogan struggled to get away. "Bourne, detonate that son of a-"

Ty used a flare and detonated her singularity, sending the Krogan flying against a wall. Even with that, the bastard still got back up laughing. "Looks like I am actually gonna have to fight to earn my credits." He glanced over at Ty, and then at Bourne. "By the way, my boss had a message for the Biotic with the knives, and the "User". 'Revenge is a dish best served cold.'"

"So is ice cream but it tastes better." Ty called, finally on his feet.

Bourne opened his mouth, then shrugged. "Yeah, can't really argue with that." He charged at the Krogan, knocking him into the air. "By the way-" he said as he was waiting for him to land. "Would it be too much trouble for the rest of you to take out the Geth?"

He put up a domed shield an instant before a rocket flew into it. "And quickly?"

"Tali, use an overload. Ashley, grab your rifle." Shepard ordered and they dispatched the geth in just a few quick shots. It helped that Shepard also fired a sabotage that hit the rocket troopers, leaving them unable to aid their fellow geth.

"That works." Bourne said, as the Krogan landed in a heap on the ground. "Now, time to finish this." His omni-tool appeared, and the buzzsaw flickered for a moment before fading away.

He was suddenly thrown against a wall himself. "I couldn't agree more." The Krogan said, already back on his feet.

Bourne hadn't even been on the ground for a moment before taking off and slamming into the Krogan, but this time it barely made him step back.

A knife flew into his hand, but the Krogan lowered his head as he threw it, and it missed the unprotected part of his head, only hitting his bony plate. "You'll have to do a lot better than that."

He was suddenly thrown sideways. "Want some backup Bourne?" Hannah asked rhetorically.

The Krogan bounced off the wall onto the ground and didn't get up this time.

"Anyone got any grenades left?" Bourne asked, never taking his eyes off the corpse.

"Why? He's obviously-" Ashley's answer was cut off by a sinister laughing sound as the Krogan got back to his feet.

"Still alive?" The battle master asked, laughing wildly.

"Go for the style points!" Ty yelled as threw Bourne a grenade, the biotic easily catching it out of the air.

"Know what, this might just qualify." He answered as the Krogan lowered his head and ran at him.

He rolled to the side at the last moment.

The krogan stopped and turned back towards him. "You'll have to do better than that if you want to take me down."

"Buddy, I've got news for you. You aren't worth killing." Bourne said with an arrogant smile.

The Krogan's face twisted with rage. "You just earned yourself a world-" His words were literally stopped in his throat at Bourne threw the grenade into his open mouth, sticking it to his tongue.

Bourne raised his hand, omni-tool glowing. "As far as last words go-" he hit a button, and the Krogan's head exploded in a fountain of blood. "He should have chosen better."

"How exactly was he not worth killing?" Cecilia had to ask.

"Oh, he was. But saying that is pretty much the worse insult you can throw at a Krogan. I figured it would tick him off enough for me a clear shot at his-" He cut himself off with a curse as a piece of rock landed just inches away from him. "We need to get the hell out of here, the whole place is coming down!"

Everyone took off running down the catwalk following Shepard. She had to trust that everyone would be able to take care of themselves while they ran.

"I'd just like to point out-" Bourne said, in between dodging falling rocks that seemed to be targeting him and just barely missing. "-The mining laser was Ty's idea!"

Shepard got to the exit tunnel and looked back to make sure everyone was behind her. Bourne was the first one out, and he stopped next to Shepard, breathing heavily.. Tali came in second running right on his heels. Ashley was pulling Liara behind her but they made it. Ty was struggling up the rear and didn't look good.

"Everyone alright?" Bourne asked, turning to look as well.

"I think I'm gonna puke." Ty answered.

Bourne opened his mouth to reply, but his suddenly widened as they began to glow. He thrust his hand forward, and then yanked it back behind him.

Ty was launched up the tunnel towards them, an instant before a giant rock fell that would have crushed him. He hovered in the air in front of Bourne, who put his arms up to catch him as he deactivated his powers.

"I told you getting stabbed by a Krogan sucked." He said, though there was a hint of strain beneath the joking tone.

"Bourne, I really need some pie right now", Ty blurted out.

Shepard bit her lip, "Damn, he sounds delusional. The knife must have been poisoned."

The way Bourne's face went from 'no expression' to 'oh shit' would have been funny another time. "Tell Chakwas to meet us when we get there." He said, almost sounding like it was an order. "I recognize this type of knife- and I'm betting the poison is just as toxic."

"Are you-"

"I'm positive. Seeing one of these things sticking out of your side isn't something you forget. And the only reason it didn't kill me was the genetic enhancements I've gotten." He looked at Ty, and his worry was evident despite his obvious efforts to hide it. "Enhancements he doesn't have."

"I can smell the ocean guys? Are we are on Virmire already?" With that, he collapsed, or would have if Bourne hadn't caught him.

Cecelia raised a hand to her ear. "Joker, tell Chakwas to meet us in the shuttle. Ty's been stabbed, and the knife is poisoned."

"And tell him to hurry!" Bourne said, again sounding like it was an order.

"And hurry." She said, the seriousness of his tone overriding her normal response. And as Ty's head slumped to the side, completely limp, she realized she was just as worried as Bourne was.

**)See, now this is the best chapter ever. Iron just got a mountain dropped on his head, Ty might shut up for a few minutes...all it needs is me punching Udina and the Council.(**

**^No, this has to be the… fourth worst chapter ever. Seriously, whose idea was it to give that Krogan charge?^**

**(Come on, do you even need to ask?)**

**S7: Hey, you are the one that tempted fate. Technically, I control your fate so don't tempt me.**

**T117: Worked for Bourne so far. He wasn't dumb enough to knock me out for last time- you were, and look what happened.  
S7: And just so you know. I already got Akuma to do a Raging Demon in Street Fighter IV.**

**(It's so cute how he thinks we care.)**

**S7: It's funny that you mock me yet I have control over your fate too. Like for instance, I could make you the Jacob of this story.**

***Even Iron can't be made that horrible.* )That's not possible to do.(**

**T117:Yeah, to be honest, I'm kinda considering having Jacob die at some point in SaWoF... really early. **

**)I would have no problems with that.( (Me neither.) *Good idea.***

**^Far as I am concerned you can do what you want.^**

**S7: Same here. Oh, by the way, should I put a big red zero on this Mass Effect armor that I am working on for EC comicon?**

**^Wait, I thought you were in a full body cast.^**

**S7: It's too much detail to really explain but stem cell research is bitching and I have motor control in my arms back. Plus, gf is helping me. I just have to be able to walk by March 15th and I will be fine.**

**(He made up the hit by a car thing as a joke and you people were...invested enough to believe him. Woo, saved it, managed to **_**not **_**insult the idiots that read this sto-...Ah damnit.) **

**S7: Okay, so I did. We thought it was hilarious and be honest, how many of you actually believed that I went and played in the street, got hit by a car that broke every bone in my body, and managed to talk the doctors into forming my cast to sit in a computer chair something that is completely counteractive to my health?**

**(I did.)**

**^It's okay, we all know you are an idiot.^**

**(I am not! I'm insane so I act like one- totally different.)**

***Should've just said "takes one to know one"***

**S7: Anyway, called Danny and he said he is up for it. But we have to work around his schedule since he is vacationing in Ireland.**

**(Meh, whatever. It's your and Trebor's problem anyway.)**

**^I can't wait to see Danny troll the shit out of you.^**

**)What he said.(**

**(I'm insane. Trolling has no effect on me.)**

**^Cool story bro, tell another.^**

**(Well...I would talk about this time I stabbed a guy with his own spine, but Bourne's holding a knife ready to throw right at my crotch, so I think now's a good time to shut up.)**

**S7: Anyway, we have a full concept for the contest. The drawing must be showing both Bourne and Ty in a heroic position. Other than that don't defame either character and post it to your deviant art or to one of our Facebook pages. Anything to add?**

**^Bonus points for having Iron in a humiliating position.^**

**~Don't feel like you can't do it. We'd love to see what everyone has to offer Japanese style, western, cartoonish, even stick figures.~**

**T117:...Stick figures?**

**~Hey, some people have mad stick figure skills.~**

**S7: How long should this go for? My vote is five chapters.**

**T117: That sounds good to me.**

**S7: Alright, you will receive your announcement and code on chapter 17. Don't worry, we will e-mail it rather than post it in the author's notes.**

**T117: Until then, Sayonara.**


	13. Cure and Coma

**Tali:**

As the shuttle landed at the end of the runway, Bourne sprinted faster than Tali knew humans were capable, carrying Ty in his arms. It looked like the only reason he slowed down was that the doors hadn't opened yet and he didn't want to run into second they did, he disappeared inside.

"Come on, let's move." Cecilia said. She turned to look at Hannah. "We taking you too?"

"If it's not too much trouble." She said, eyes locked on where Bourne had gone. "Someone has to keep an eye on those two so they don't get killed."

Tali couldn't shake the feeling that something was up with Hannah; it was just like she was all wrong, that there was something 'off' about her. She took off into the shuttle while Shepard and Hannah had their chat. They seemed to be getting along a little too well.

Cecelia scared her a more than a little bit, while she got the instant sense she could trust the other with her life. They were complete polar opposites, or at least it seemed like it to Tali. _Then again, what do I really know about humans?_

When she got in, Ty was facedown on a fold out table that took up half the space, Bourne and Chakwas taking up another fourth. For some reason, Bourne had removed the chest plate of his armor, and had the shirt he'd worn underneath pulled up so Chakwas could look at something.

"Do you know anything about the toxin itself?" She asked as she turned back to Ty, sticking an IV into his arm.

"No." Bourne answered with a shake of his head, putting his shirt back down and reaching for the his armor. He stopped and thought for a moment. "Well, maybe. A krogan I knew said that it was a stronger and less watered mix of Ryncol. He might have been joking, but it could be true." He shrugged. His face was mostly expressionless, but there was a hint of desperation in it.

Tali squeezed herself into the farthest chair so as to not take up more room than needed.

Bourne finished putting his armor back on, but continued to stand nearby.

The doors to the shuttle closed and it took off into the sky. It took her a second but she realized that Shepard, Ashley, and Hannah weren't on.

"Where are the others?" She asked everyone.

"They went to pick up the Mako. We will meet the Commander on the Normandy." Chakwas answered.

Ty convulsed on the table and began scream, "Stay away! Stay away! Iron!"

His hand shot out and touched Bourne's armor and his nanites began covering him. Bourne moved quickly and swatted Ty's hand away before any more got onto him. He clenched his fist, and his biotics surrounded the nanites, condensing them and crushing them.

"That's not a good sign." He muttered, barely loud enough for Tali's translator to pick up. He spoke up. "When I was out last time, they had to slap a biotic-nullifier on me so I didn't destroy everything around me. Like... like the toxin was stimulating my powers."

Tali couldn't look Bourne in the eye. Something about him made her feel even more awkward than she usually was. Forcing herself to calm she managed to ask. "Do you think it could be doing the same thing to his nanites?"

Bourne hesitated, and Chakwas turned to her. "Nanites?"

Tali just went on, "Yeah, that's how he can use his powers. Just like Bourne."

He shook his head. "Not quite. Mine are more simplistic, and only amplify biotics. I can't do anything else with them." He looked at Ty. "I don't know exactly how his work, but he usually needs direct contact to do anything with them."

Chakwas pinched her bridge of her nose. "Well, considering that I have no idea how they work either, I honestly can't do anything. Not if touching him with anything could result in-"

Bourne cut her off. "I might have an idea."

"Which is?"

He put his hand over Ty's head. "He's used his nanites on me before. It's a longshot, but if I can siphon them off enough to weaken him-"

"Even if I could touch him Bourne, I'm not sure I'd be able to do anything. You said yourself, the only reason you lived was your genetic enhancements. And even then you needed a liver replacement, which I don't have the equipment to produce in this shuttle."

He closed his eyes, thinking.

"I'm sorry, but the sad truth is that there may not be anything we can do for him."

Tali put her head down. "So we just have to let him sit and die?"

Bourne's biotics manifested around for a moment as his eyes popped open. "No. If The Grim Reaper wants him, I'm going to make him fight for it."

His hand was on Ty's head before either of them could warn him against it. It was instantly surrounded in nanites.

"Come on Ty, don't you dare stop fighting." He said, teeth clenched as nanites of his own started flowing down his arm, being sucked into Ty.

Ty glowed green as he lifted off the table and he ripped Bourne's hand off his head, "Get outta my head!"

An explosion went off around his hand as he opened his eyes, "What's going on?!"

Bourne was on the ground, stunned from the blast, so it was Tali who yelled his answer, "You've been poisoned!"

Ty looked down at his chest and punched into it. The nanites surrounded him and changed from red to green and then faded. He closed his eyes and fell backwards onto the gurney.

For a moment, the only sound was that of the heart monitor, a faint but constant blip.

"I don't know what he just did-" Bourne said, getting back to his feet with a wince. "But I'm going to kill him if it didn't work."

Chakwas did a scan over him, "I'm not seeing any of the poison. But judging by his brain activity and heart rate, whatever he did also put him into a coma."

"Better odds than before, but still not great." He looked at Ty's unconscious face. "I guess all we can do now is cross our fingers and hope."

Ty rolled over on his side and muttered. "Ashley, where'd you get that sundress?"

"Though at this point, I'm not really sure what outcome I'm hoping for."His death glare gave Shepard a run for her money.

Chakwas just laughed. "What's wrong Bourne, got something for the Gunnery Sergeant?"

He sat down a few seats away from Tali, and didn't answer. This was Tali's chance to make another conversation. She thought of something that they could talk about that both of them would understand. Bourne's omni-saw, that was something she and him could talk about.

Back in the valley before they'd met the Armature, he'd been using it to cut apart any Geth that got close enough. "So, did Ty give you the saw?"

"Yes." He said tersely.

Tali shrunk a little bit. "Uh, how are you liking it?"

He glanced at her, then down at his arm. He brought up his omni-tool, and she was sure he was about to activate it again.

"I think it's fried now." He said, clenching his fist without having anything happen. "I tried using it when I was fighting the Krogan, but it only worked for a second before just flickering out."

Tali looked away and said. "Well, I could take a look at it... you know, if you want me to. I am good with tech after all."

He glanced at her, and then back at his arm. "I guess it's worth a try. Want to swap seats so you're not having to reach over me?"

Tali smiled and stood. "Sure."

**Bourne:**

I sat down next to Tali, though I doubted she'd actually be able to do anything. But if it kept her busy and her thoughts off of Ty, I was willing to let her try.

I looked at the User again, and if the ECG wasn't telling me otherwise, I'd have thought he was a corpse. "Mmmmh, chicken."

_Then again, at least a corpse would shut up. _If he were to stand up at that moment and hug me, I thought I might actually be relieved enough to let him. At least for a moment.

I had to fight a smile at the thought of a corpse- specifically a certain one that looked like me and was clad in crimson armor. At the same time though, it felt a little too easy. I knew I was probably jinxing myself with the thought, but I had an odd sort of premonition about him.

_At least if he did make it, Hero also has a body to help me kick his ass. _

I glanced where he'd been stabbed, then realized Chakwas had removed the knife so she could stitch him up. It was lying on a table nearby. I considered pulling it over for a closer look- and maybe as a souvenir of sorts.

As I did, the Krogan's words came to me. "_By the way, my boss had a message for the biotic with the knives, and the "User". Revenge is a dish best served cold."_

I had to suppress a shiver, knowing Tali would pick up on it if I let it pass. _There's no way that...could Saren know? Even if I was just a coincidence, which is too unlikely to be true, how else would he know about Ty? And revenge...if Ty's version remembered being beaten...then it's possible this one does as well. _

I looked over at Ty and noticed he was clenching his fist tightly and sweat was starting to form on his forehead. According to the equipment he was hooked up to, his heart rate was going up too- way too high and way too fast. I would have got back up and tried to help Chakwas again but Tali still wasn't done. And I didn't want to have the thing suddenly activate and slice someone in half.

I looked at the equipment again, and was reminded of that morning, when he'd been in a similar condition before I shook him awake. "Any idea what's happening to him?"

Chakwas sat back in her seat and leaned on her knees. "I can honestly say that despite my years of being a doctor, I haven't a clue. Ty here is a case that scares me."

I considered what I knew for a moment. "I'm no doctor, but I'm guessing that stuff has some sort of...hallucinogenic properties? I'm not sure what it'd be for nightmares."

"Your guess is as good as mine Private Bourne."

_Except mine is better right now. I don't think that Iron did anything until I'd been at least stabilized. Which could mean that he's recovering. And on top of that, he was like this when he was in perfect health, so it's...argh, I've got no idea either._

_^Oh god my head.^_

If I hadn't already been looking at him, my head would have whipped that way at the 'sound.'

_)Ty? Damn, you're one tough son of a bitch if you're surviving that.(_

_^Wait, I was dying and why can't I move?^_

I glanced at Tali, who was absorbed in the challenge of trying to fix the saw, and then at Chakwas, who was looking at the floor in defeat.

Hoping that they wouldn't notice if I got too involved in the conversation, I replied. _)You know how I got stabbed with a poisoned knife and needed a new liver? You got stabbed with a similar knife- or the same, depending on how you want to look at it.(_

_^Dibs on the knife.^_

_)Yeah, already called it.( _I had wanted it as a souvenir, so I figured it wasn't even lying. _)Plus, not only did he also stab me back when I did this, I'm the one that killed him. Twice.(_

_^Fine, I'll just buy a tomahawk at the Citadel and use that... okay, I am getting distracted from the subject. Am I going to need a new liver?^_

_)I'm honestly amazed that you're even in a state where you can do the mind thing- and also annoyed that thing's still around. I thought removing Hero would have- Chakwas is stumped at this point, and so am I. You bolted up, caused a small explosion, then shoved your hand into your chest and I guess did something to heal yourself a bit?(_

_^So, that wasn't a dream... Why the hell were you getting in my head?!^_

_)I'm sorry, would you have preferred to just die? Because those were my options: Standby, or try doing something to save your ungrateful ass.(_

_^...That's what you were trying to do? Then why did you open my hand-eye coordination and try to delete my ability to pick my nose?^_

_)...I didn' on purpose anyway. You were trying to matrix anything you touched. So I instigated the contact and hoped one of us might be able to do something to keep you alive.( _I chuckled across the line. _)And then you tried to blow me up. Some gratitude.(_

_^Alright, so what do I do now?^_

_)...Not die? I couldn't even turn a distress beacon into a warning beacon, how the hell do you expect me to know how the matrix powers work?(_

_^Fine, can you at least get some headphones for me while I am in here? I will make it worth your while.^_

_)How?(_

_^Isn't there an omni-tool app for it? Like, omni-headphones.^_

_)No, I meant how am I going to convince them to put headphones on you? You're in a coma as far as anyone else can tell. And "I heard his voice in my head asking me to" won't exactly do anything but make them lock me up.( _I thought for a moment. _)Alright, hang on, maybe I can- what type of music did you want?(_

_^Hollywood Undead, Flogging Molly, Dropkick Murphys, Imagine Dragons, Linkin Park, and Gaelic Storm are my favorite bands.^_

_)I'm not sure they'd even recognize any of those in this day and age. But I can probably at least get that type.(_

I looked over at Chakwas. "Kinda got a crazy idea that might help him out."

She gestured for me to go on.

"I know he was really into old rock music. Maybe playing something like that for him could help snap him out of whatever's going on."

_^If Chakwas doesn't agree, I am going to make dealing with me hell for her.^_

_)You know, she's the last person I'd expect the AI to be, considering that's who it was last time, but do you really want to take the risk? Also, Cecelia would demote you to private second class.(_

_^I meant in a guy in a coma way. I don't think she is the AI either.^_

_)Should I even ask what you mean by that?(_

_^I meant I won't be trying to get out of here any time soon. Plus, I have you and Hero to talk too. Not like I talk to anyone else.^_

_)So, you're just going to make her wonder what the hell is wrong with you and cause her no end of stress because she rejected medical advice from someone who has no idea what he's talking about?(_

_^Bingo. You sure are getting smarter.^_

_)That seems like kind of a dick move. Just saying.( _

"At this point, I'll try anything." Chakwas answered before he could.

I turned my head to look at Tali. "I'm going to need my arm back." She finished something up on my omni-tool and nodded, letting go of my arm. I stood up and walked over to him, setting up an omni-tool link.

_^Alright, music time and if you put on like the Barney song or Fireflies- I will make sure to sing it terribly over this connection^_

_)Yeah, I got enough of that from Hero. Really wish I'd known about her before discovering just how effective it was against Iron.(_

_^I wonder if she gets reception too. Hello, calling everyone's Hero. Do you read me?^_

_)She's on the ground with Cecillia in the mako. I don't know that this thing would work at that distance- and I swear to god if she answers after I've said that, I'm going to be pissed.(_

I activated an extranet search for the bands he'd specified, and activated something to download whatever music was available. _I should have enough to pay for that, and if I don't...well, it's not like he can't pay me back._

_^Come on, I kept this link for the reason that it will be easier to chat without people hearing us.^_

_)Yeah, but from at least a couple miles away?(_

_^... This is a mental link. Not a radio. Only reason she wouldn't be able to hear me is the eezo core affecting the psychonetic connection.^_

_)Wait, how the hell would that- forget it, I'm just going to assume you know what you're talking about when it comes to tech...except that I'm full of element zero nodes that give me my biotics, so why wouldn't that stop it?(_

_^It's because of those nodes that you can talk to me. I have them too thanks to Flare. So I mimicked my nodes into you and Hero... Possibly Iron too.^_

_)At least he's buried under a few thousand tons of rubble, so it wouldn't matter. Also, that makes zero sense to me, but it's already making my brain hurt so I'm just going to nod my head and smile.(_

_^Okay, to be honest I am just making this up to better help you understand. Truth is that it is way too complex and I can barely understand it. It's like a second grader teaching a baby about the Civil War.^_

A faint beep let me know that my download was complete, so I sent the files to his omni-tool, and I faintly heard music coming from his earpiece.

_Alright, that takes care of that. _I headed back to my seat. "Any progress?" I asked Tali as I sat down next to her.

Tali cracked her knuckles. "Yeah, the file was corrupted. Luckily, I am defragmenting the file and rebooting it."

"So, do you still need my arm or whatever you did auto executing, or..."

"It's got a mind link."

I gave her my best blank stare. "Huh?"

Tali pointed to her head. "Ty programmed it so that it is responsive to your mind. So think it, do it."

"So it's working now? Or-" I shook my head. "Some days I wonder how I've survived this long without any skills whatsoever when it comes to tech."

Tali took a deep breath. "Yes, it works. You said is it auto executing so I was answering that question."

"I meant was the repair program auto executing, or did you need to finish it manually." I glanced down at my arm and activated my omni-tool. "So, I'm guessing-" I held my arm out in front of me, where there was nothing within the saw's range, and clenched my fist, causing it to appear. "Yep.." _Huh, didn't think she'd actually be able to fix this thing_.

"Thanks." I said to her sincerely, then turned it off. I didn't think the flames would be enough to set off the shuttle's fire control systems, but I didn't want to find out if I was wrong.

_^What the hell did you do?^_

_)What, did I accidently put Justin Bieber in your playlist or something? I wasn't all that specific about-(_

_^I meant to the omni-tool^_

_)Oh. The saw shorted out after the Krogan stabbed you, and Tali offered to try fixing it. I figured it might take her mind off of you, so I let her.(_

_^And did she?^_

_)I can't exactly test it in here, but as far as I can tell it's working perfectly. I didn't think she'd be able to fix it to be honest.(_

_^She shouldn't.^_

_)Yeah, that's what I was thinking, since you used the User thing-... I really wish I'd worded that another way- to give it to me. And since I stopped feeling like crap, I'm guessing you getting stabbed somehow tipped the balance away from you being the bloody digital overlord. I thought that was why it disappeared.(_

_^No, once I create it into another object it remains on the plain of existence. There is no way that something would disappear if I go down.^_

I digested that for a moment. _)Tali said the file was corrupted, and she had to refragment it...but why would that have happened? Or rather, why would it have happened to the omni-tool code, and not matrix code?(_

_^... Let's just chalk it up to stuff we don't understand but the AI will probably do it again and we still won't understand it.^_

_)Maybe( _I still wasn't fond of the idea that someone- something- was doing everything it could to make our lives difficult.)_It could be related to the Krogan though, like...like he was a sort of 'boss battle' so the AI disabled the saw to up the difficulty. No way he was that tough to kill last time, and that was when I was less experienced and didn't have back up.(_

_^If that was a boss battle, then where are my experience points? Another question, do you think style points are a multiplyer for experience points or like bonus points?^_

_)I think you lost whatever 'points' you had when you got overconfident and- okay, maybe you couldn't have anticipated him being able to charge, but it was a mistake to stop the spinning then if it was working.(_

_^I thought he was dead. He hit a wall at like fifty miles an hour.^_

_)Your exact words were "Bonus Round, take out the Kroaaaaaaaaaaah!". And that reminds me of something else. He said his boss had a message for us- revenge is a dish best served cold...I think this version of Saren knows about us too, like yours did.(_

_^Well, that sucks balls. I am digging this song. My legs are dangling off the edge. Stomach full of pills didn't work again. I put a bullet in my head and I'm gone gone gone gooooone.^_

_)I thought one of the conditions for me not putting crap in there too was that you wouldn't sing along? And that first bit may just be the understatement of the year.(_

_^Look, don't freak out. Just chill, I will be out of this in a few days and then we can go back to the Citadel. Maybe visit the Consort, she was able to shed some light on my questions last time.^_

_)... Dude, I am not going to "visit" a prostitute. Even a hot alien one.(_

_^You know, the whole monogender thing has me wondering-^_

My gut instantly told me the last thing I wanted to know was what he was wondering. _)Also, that seems way too easy. Why would the AI be in the same place as last time? It seems like it'd be someplace new, and we'd have to look for it, or maybe stumble upon it by total accident.(_

_^No, that's the controller AI. This one has to watch over the story. There is little to no reason for it to hide itself.^_

_)Why wouldn't it? Isn't it... For example, if the protagonist gets a new weapon during a cutscene, that'd be tied in to gameplay. So if the difficulty is ramped up, or a boss was super tough, wouldn't a canon reason need to be given?(_

_^Yes, but the story has guidelines. The gameplay tries to kill you and that stops the story from moving forward.^_

_)I guess...why a hooker though? I'm just saying, if I had the choice between that, or being a total badass like Wrex- gotta go with Wrex.(_

_^Because... it's an AI. They don't make sense to you.^_

_)I don't think anything about anything makes sense any more. I mean, how many times did we both read pretty much this exact same fucking thing? Oh, I'm just minding my own business playing x-box- and bam, I'm in the middle of a video game. If that were the case with me, I'd want to shove a singularity down my author's throat.(_

_^You act as if this is all planned out when in reality it's probably a dangerous event that has happened to more people than just us.^_

I was about to call him an idiot, but I stopped and considered it. _)Well, if you subscribe to that infinite universe theory, then there's an infinite number of realities that are like our 'real world' and an infinite number like Mass Effect, so it's possible a few people have been sucked in... And it's also really creepy to think about. Thanks for the nightmare fuel.(_

_^How is that nightmare fuel? I find it comforting to think that others have experienced what I am going through.^_

_But how many went through this without being lucky enough to survive? _I kept that thought to myself, wishing he hadn't brought it up in the first place. _)I guess.(_

_^You have to admit. Knowing I exist is a lot more comforting than knowing you are an isolated incident.^_

_)Only because you proved how I could have screwed up way more than I did.(_

_^...^_

_)Hey, not saying I didn't totally screw stuff up on my end too. Just...not badly enough to let people know they were video game characters.(_

_^I'm gonna just relax and let this thing pass. I'll talk to you later.^_

_)Just do me one favor- live through it.(_

_^No promises. After all, you lived through this so I probably screwed up enough to kill myself.^_

_)Don't get my hopes up like that.( _I joked. _)Enjoy the nap.(_

I wasn't sure exactly how to block him out, so I just tried pushing his voice away, like I had with Iron or Hero. Unlike with them, where I could still sense them at the back of my mind, all I had was a vague impression that I could reach for to talk to him again.

Not that I was complaining, not if it meant I could actually keep secrets from him if I wanted or needed to.

_At least one good thing happened today- Iron finally got what was coming to him. _

**(Yeah, fuck you.)**

**)Ah, what's the matter, did you get a booboo from the mountain falling on you?(**

**(Yeah! That was supposed to be a stunt mountain so we could 'shoot' the scene- you dropped an actual mountain on me!)**

**)It was Hero's idea.( *It was Bourne's idea.* **

**S7: It was definitely enjoyable to see that and your reaction afterwards. Here are your hospital bills.**

**^So, can we just mass release like all the chapters so we can get to chapter 61?^**

**~I agree, that is like the best chapter.~ **

**)It's the chapter Iron dies.(**

**(It is not!...Is it?)**

**)If you keep breaking Trebor's door down, he can change it so it is.(**

**S7: Anyway, time to debunk some stuff and make this short since apparently one of you thinks these are too long.**

**^Honestly, I think we should make this as long as the story to screw with the guy.^**

**(Only if I'm in it. Cause we all know I'm the fan favorite.)**

**^Everyone loves to see you get hurt. That doesn't make you their favorite. From all the fangasms and rage in the reviews I could say Bourne is the favorite. God knows why.^**

***Cause while he's one of the most irritating people I've ever met, everything is relative.***

**(So you're saying Bourne is immature and annoying, but Ty is more so?)**

**)I can't decide if that's a compliment or not.(**

**S7: Anyway, we better wrap this up now so we don't drone on.**

**T117: I will say this though- The chapters got longer as we wrote, so this 'long note short chapter thing' shouldn't be for much longer.**

**S7: Indeed, also can I just say who the hell thinks that Ty is doing more of the stuff in this? Seriously, if you are going to say shit like that and just keep complaining then you might as well not read this altogether.**

**T117: Exactly. I've said this several times, but ****It's a freaking crossover**.

**)Also, I'm the one that took out the Krogan while Ty was busy getting stabbed. And as for why they make fun of me when I get hurt but not when other people do- A: Fuck you dude, B: It's the same reason nobody cares if Wolverine or Superman gets tossed through a wall but do care if the same happens to Batman or Cyclops. I can take that sort of abuse thanks to the genemods, and now the cybernetics.( **

**(Plus, he's just really fun to watch get hurt...also, NERD!)**

**^Dude, he beat you.^**

**(Cause he cheated.)**

**S7: Yeah, so this is my final warning. If it is about how you think that the story is lame or you hate one character. Keep it to yourself. If you have constructive criticism, a request, question, comment, justified concern, or to praise us then we will accept it but griping is seriously childish.**

**T117: And annoying.**

**S7: And we honestly don't give two fucks about them seeing as how we are ****67 chapters deep in this.**

**T117: And that's maybe 2/3rds of the way done, tops. But if it'll shut you up, I've currently got six chapters done of SaWoF, and am working on number seven. But it is not coming out until after UiaWoF is finished being released, for reasons that will become clear later. **

**S7: And as for the seven people that seem to like Users. My second one will be out October. Probably around the 17th since I can and I don't feel like making you wait until April of next year to release it.**

**T117: I make no promises either way. But remember- 20 reviews means a new chapter. More reviews, more chapters, the thing goes faster.**

**(Wow, way to be subtle.)**

**^Well, they are tired of the bitchy negativity that some people have to bring in every other chapter. Especially when this is really just a fun side project for them.^**

**T117: Yeah, this is way more fun than writing alone.**

**)For you. You're not the one getting stabbed or blown up.(**

**(I. Got. A. Mountain. Dropped. On. My. Head.)**

**~Yes, you did. Now, wrap this up before someone writes a review about the length.~**

**T117: Ugh! **_**Fine**_**. Sayonara.**

**S7:1473I2**


	14. A Good Lie with Some Nanites on Top PLZ

**Ty:**

I just let myself relax on the medbay bed. I don't know how far they took me or which bed I was on but I did know that it was comfy. Especially after Shepard had some of the bedding material moved in for me.

It was strange that I could hear people but I couldn't see or talk to them. Though, it was funny that people felt that they could chat around me and thought I wasn't hearing them. Shepard had to tell someone that they were an idiot for doing something like an idiot. Chakwas talked to herself a lot about my condition and what she could do.

The only weird thing was that someone kept coming in and holding my hand for an hour or two at a time. It could have been a coma thing, trying to see if I can react with brain activity. It made sense that someone would have to be there if I managed to move at all.

I began to get bored and the person was holding my hand again. Curiosity was getting the better of me and I had to find out who it was_. ^Hero, can you read me- er, hear me- uh, think me?^_

_*Yeah. Bourne and I are in the mess hall.*_

_^Do you think you could help me out? Without Bourne?^_

_*He said he was going to go down to the shooting range, so probably.* _She paused thoughtfully. _*He's been doing that an awful lot since Tali fixed the saw for him. Anyway, what do you need?*_

_^Good, there is someone holding my hand right now. Is that like a coma thing?^_

_*...I can't see unless I go in there, and since you implied you didn't want Bourne...and, he's getting up and leaving, so I guess it doesn't matter now.*_

_^Okay, you should come in here and see who it is. The curiosity is killing me.^_

_*Hang on. I'll tell you in a minute or two.*_

_^Thanks, I knew I can count on you.^_

After a few moments, I felt the hand let go as the door opened.

"How's he doing?" I heard Hero ask.

"He's tough enough to make it this far. If he doesn't wake up soon though, we'll have to leave him on the Citadel", Shepard replied

^_Shepard?^ _I half asked, half stated.

_*It's Swan now, remember?* _She replied with the mental equivalent of a smile.

_^Why is she here?... Wait, you like the name?^_

_*It was a joke... I think I spending that much time in Bourne's head rubbed off on me.*_

_^Funny, you were the sidekick to my sidekick.^_

She didn't reply to that. "So, I've been talking to Bourne about what you're doing. You got room for one more?" It didn't really sound like a question.

I felt a hand lean on my chest. _^Are you leaning on me? I can't breath.^_

"Well, I figure that we will be making a stop at the Citadel soon. I'm going to look up your records there and if I like it...You can consider yourself part of the crew."

_*Two things. It's her leaning on you, and can you fake or create files for me?*_

_^Yeah, if I get out of this coma by then. You ever wonder if other people get stuck in the Mass Effect universe? I have talked to Bourne about it but he thinks that his life is being written by a fucked up author.^_

_*...you're not very good at telling when he's being serious, are you?*_

"Sounds fair." She said aloud to Cecilia. "You going to make me sign up with the alliance like Jason and Ty?"

Shepard laughed, "No, I didn't really make them either. I just told them that so Bourne would be more inclined to listen to me and 'promote' Ty to Corporal to see what they would do."

_*...Bitch move.* _"Hah, I can't believe they fell for something like that!"

_^I am really liking this Shepard.^_

_*You do realize that...nevermind.*_

_^I wonder how many girls have gotten trapped in a version of this universe. Got to be at least a few. Statistics show that events that occur twice will occur more than that.^ *I just work here.* _"Alright. I'm going to go down to the range and make sure my guns are still working after all the dust that got into them."

_^Do you ever have flashes or get your memory mixed up with Cecelia's?^_

_*No. I remember pretty much everything as it happened- and Bourne was able to fill me in on a few minor things I didn't, because I was KOed or not paying attention or whathaveyou.*_

_^Sorry, I was just wondering. If you were from Bourne's universe then you would have the same brain waves. If you were from mine then I would believe that you and Cecelia weren't on some sort of mental connection.^_

_*...* _"Anyway, I'll see you later." She said to Cecellia, walking out of the medbay.

_^Okay, I am a little bored and I have been focusing on different objectives and views. Not much to keep me satisfied when I am listening to YFM's My Balls for the thirtieth time.^_

_*The rock version or the original?...what? Some of Bourne's memories about the 'real world' bled over.*_

_^Rock version, it's the one that fits in with Rock of the millenium.^_

_*Well, you could be a lot worse off. When Bourne got stabbed, he had Iron in his head trying to kill him, instead of just eavesdropping or listening to music...what's the range on this communication anyway? Because I just stepped into the elevator, and-* _She was suddenly cut off, apparently answering the question for us both.

_^Damn it.^_

As much as I hated it, I just continued to do things that a person in a coma does.

**Shepard:**

Shepard walked into the comm room, and found that Bourne was already waiting for her- though nobody else had shown up yet. His normal poker face had been replaced for a look of irritation.

"Section 3 article 8, subsection 12." He said in a clipped tone.

"Shepard rule 2. Don't quote the alliance handbook to me." Shepard spat at him.

He crossed his arms. "Funny, that sounds a bit like Bourne rule number 8: Don't play me for a fool. According to said handbook, promotions in the field have to be submitted in writing to command at the next possible opportunity. And as you've yet to do that, and I looked myself up in the database and found squat, I'd say you were lying about 'Private Bourne' and 'Corporal Flynn.'"

She smiled and patted Bourne on the shoulder. "Look at the new detective. Alright, I have yet to get you in the system."

He brushed her hand off. "Another bit of the handbook I'm apparently not allowed to quote states that if they aren't filed properly by the promotee as well as promoter, then it's also invalidated." He smiled smugly. "Believe it or not, I've memorized the thing, and I figured out all the loopholes. Helpful for when my work brought me into contact with the Alliance." She couldn't tell if he was bluffing or not, but she had to lean more towards the latter.

"What's your point Bourne?"

"Simple. Your orders, I'll follow. You try putting Ty in charge-"

"Be honest, you never would have listened to him anyway. Plus, Ty isn't the one to order people around."

"And here I thought I was the detective." He shook his head. "Look, I get that acting like a hardcore badass normally works for you, but it also has a lot of drawbacks."

"Name one."

"You intimidate your allies as much as your friends." He looked down, and she thought he was simply avoiding her gaze. Then he lifted up his sleeve, revealing what looked like a stab wound in his upper arm. "At one point, I had a team. I wasn't all that dissimilar from you- I worried about the job first, and consequences second."

He looked back up at her. "At first, it was just an act to get them to fall in line when I needed them to. But eventually, the act became more than just an act. And when I took it too far...most of them forgave me, eventually. But I can count the number of them that still trusted me on a quarian's hand. The rest of them always had their guard up around me, and I can't say I really blame them."

He pointed at the door. "My team was battle hardened. This group- Kaidan's naive, Ty more so, Tali's just a kid, and Liara's only slightly older by Asari standards. They see you, they don't think of you as someone who gets the job done whatever the cost, they see you as someone to fear so you don't leave them in a shallow grave."

Shepard clenched her fist and walked over to the other side of the comm room. "I don't think you get where I am coming from in experience."

"You mean Torfan, or the tenth street reds?"

She smashed her fist down and crushed part of the metal railing. "I killed, I stole, and I took what I wanted. When I showed any sign of weakness", Her scars on her back felt fresh, "things went way over fubar."

She turned back to him, "I learned something from the Reds that you probably never knew. I learned how to judge a person on their first words to you. I put you off earlier to make you think that I wasn't like this but I really am. I saw you the first time and you know what I saw? A man who was and is weak, not physically but mentally. You could lose your entire thought process at any minute and just quit. Hell, you probably have. On top of that, your whole rebel against authority thing probably comes from a very boring childhood. The second you got a gun you said that you wanted to be a hero but ended up being the villain. So, you played that and got carried away like you said. You got to where you are now because you are broken. You don't know who the hell you are because you refuse to find out. You don't want to push yourself mentally because you think you are complacent with how you are now."

He was silent for a moment, glaring. "You know, I called you out on your lie, so I'll let you in on one of mine. I didn't 'volunteer' for the nanite treatment. I was cloned, grown, genetically engineered-whatever you want to call it- to be the perfect human biotic." His biotics flared around him unconsciously. "You grew up on the streets, I was raised in a lab. For one thing, and one thing only: To be a weapon." He spat the last word in disgust.

"The only reason their brainwashing stopped working is because they fucked up and ended up wiping my memory clean instead." He pointed at his head, fingers in the shape of a gun, and pulled the trigger. "Totally clean slate. Thing about that is, it's total. Absolute- or so I thought."

His biotics faded as he got ahold of himself. "I managed to find a group of mercs and fit right in- became their second in command. And then someone made a comment that was evidently a trigger word for that brainwashing I mentioned before, and I ended up almost slaughtering the lot of them." He clenched his fists. "You ever had no control over what your body did? Like, just watching it strangle a friend and being powerless to stop it, even as you saw and heard everything you were doing? Or been forced to watch your own hand slowly pull a knife out of your own arm and throw it into a friend's stomach?"

He laughed harshly. "You're right, for a while I did try to be a hero. I felt like I was doing some good, until my past caught up with me. They locked me up, and I managed to steal the key while one of them was talking to me. I tried to get away, to protect them, to figure out what the hell had happened. And then I ran into someone else from the same program. Bronze. He'd gone mad and destroyed the place, but he made sure I knew what I was." He pointed at his face. "And he made sure I'd be reminded every time I looked in the mirror. I know exactly who and what I was- and that's why I'm making damn sure I don't dig too deep for who I am now. If that makes me weak, so fucking be it. I'd rather be weak and in control than strong and reliant on pre-programmed mind games." He took a breath, tense and on edge.

"What about Ty?"

He looked her dead in the eyes. "I don't claim to like him, but his secrets are his own to reveal if and when he chooses."

"I meant what about him in the program?"

He leaned against the wall, arms crossed, and jaw set. "He still remembers who he was, and is. That's all I'm going to say."

As if summoned, Hannah suddenly walked in as Shepard's mouth opened. "Jason? I figured you'd be down on the range still."

"I just came up to have a chat with the Commander about a few things." His rage had been replaced with a cool mask and emotionless voice the second the door opened.

She sat down in the chair next to where he was leaning. "About what?"

"Bourne was just confessing his love to me." Shepard said resorting back to her old habits.

She looked from him, to her, to him, and then back to her. "Yeah, somehow I doubt that. You're really not his type."

"So, what are you here about?"

"Bored, wanted to see if anyone else was here yet." She said with a shrug, then smiled. "Plus, I was hoping I might catch you arguing with the Council. From what I hear, it'd be pretty entertaining."

Shepard took her seat and leaned back. "Ha, mostly just pick up the phone and slam it down."

"Which may be one of the few times all three of us would agree on how to handle a situation." Bourne commented.

Hannah opened her mouth, but he cut her off. "Come on, you know you'd do it too. Seriously, where I do even start with those idiots. I mean, 'The testimony of one traumatized dockworker is hardly compelling evidence?' Did they think he pulled a name and description out of his ass at random?"

"Yeah, and c'mon, I needed to prove another spectre's guilt to become one. Just ridiculous."

"Yeah, you're welcome." Bourne said with a smirk.

"For what? Being in the wrong place at the right time?'"

"Touche."

Shepard looked up at the ceiling, "Joker, everyone seems to be headed this way so set now as time for the debrief."

Joker's voice came in calmly. "Roger commander."

"So, Swan, Liara tells me you have a thing for Drell."

Her face went bright red, and Bourne's shoulders shook from the effort of not laughing.

"Is it true that they cause you to trip out when you do anything fun with them?"

"You do know how easy it'd be for me to put you in stasis?"

"I caught her red handed with the drell edition of Fornax once." Bourne chimed in, barely keeping from doubling over with laughter.

Hannah's face went even redder. "You, I wouldn't feel guilty about putting in stasis either."

"Yeah, I can warp myself out of there just like I did back on Therum."

"You really want to test that?"

He seemed to think about it a moment."Nah, not right now."

The door opened up and everyone began entering for the debrief.

**Bourne:**

_*Paragon or not, I'm going to kick your ass later for that Fornax comment.*_

_)Consider it payback for a few things.(_

_^God, I wish I was there.^_

_*Cecilia looked ready to beat the crap out of Bourne before I walked in. You really want to be in the same room?*_

_)Thanks for hurrying by the way. She was actually starting to scare me.(_

_*As opposed to...?*_

_)Heh, can't argue with that.(_

_^Managed to find out why she was in the medbay earlier?^_

_)Personally, I'd guess she was trying to work up the nerve to smother you and put you out of your misery. Seems like the type of thing she'd do.(_

_*You don't really believe that.*_

_)Like hell I don't.(_

_^You are never going to be my wingman... Want to go hit the bar later Swan? Bet I could help you find a nice Drell.^_

_*No.*_

_)FYI, I haven't tested how hard she can hit, but considering that Raptor and Cecilia are practically superhuman in that respect...also, she can biotically bend you into a pretzel, so you shouldn't push it.(_

_^James needs to be here already. He would be my wingman and chicks dig a man who can speak spanish.^_

_)Give me a spanish dictionary and grammar guide and give me a week.(_

_^Como te llamas tu? Means, what do you call yourself.^_

_)I know what it means, perfect memory, remember? And yeah, if you expect me to be your wingman...meh, make it worth my while and I'll consider it. The range gets boring after a while, and I've already done enough sidequest shit to last for a long time.(_

_^First we need club clothes and then we go to the flux and get you out on the dance floor, maybe start a bar fight, and rock the house.^_

_` )That's...screw it, I'm up for almost anything at this point as long as it involves getting shitfaced drunk.(_

_*I'm just going to say it's a bad idea in advance, and throw in an "I told you so" in case I forget later.*_

_)...you know, I think I'll also need some sort of colored contacts and maybe some makeup or something.(_

_^Chicks dig guys with mystery and glowing eyes is definitely equal to mystery.^_

_)Maybe, but nobody will come within a hundred feet while my face looks like this. (_

_^I bet I can make an adjustment with some User magic.^_

_)Thanks, but I'd rather not chance you messing up and making me somehow uglier than I already am.(_

_*I wouldn't worry about that.*_

_)Don't you have a drell to make out with or something?(_

_^Oh snap, mental five.^_

_*If you two are done, Liara just walked in, which means everyone's here, which means the debriefing is about to start.*_

I glanced around and saw that she was right.

_^But I'm so bored.^_

_)Do you currently have a maniac trying to take over your body? No? Then you're doing a hell of alot better than I did when I got stabbed. Why can't you just...'derez'' the poison, or give yourself higher resistance stats or something? And before you answer, know that that was a rhetorical question and I'm about to shut down the line.(_

I slammed down the mental barriers that cut them both off.

Hero shot me a disapproving look, but didn't comment.

"Okay, so if we are all agreed, I am going to cut out everything that Ty did." Cecilia said.

"Yeah, probably not a bad idea." I said with a nod. "So what are we saying about the Krogan or Armature instead? Or are we just cutting those parts out entirely?"

"The armature had a chink in its armor and the Krogan was quickly dispatched with inferno rounds", Wrex suggested.

Cecilia nodded. "That should work."

"Except that Ty got stabbed first because he was overconfident." I put in.

"We can just say the Krogan overpowered him when he was on point." Garrus threw in.

"He nearly...screw it, whichever seems more likely to you." I said with a nod to Cecilia.

"The latter. Kaidan, finish the report and send it."

_Heh, that's the one upside to not sharing command. I don't have to deal with those things._

"So Liara, after talking to them, did you come up with anything they can use?" Hero asked I was somewhat surprised that she'd been able to fake knowing her as well as she had so far, but then again, she had known her pretty well back in her own version of things.

"No not yet, I only just got the good doctor to let me out of the medbay."

_She certainly has bigger problems...or Liara just used my method of putting the doc in stasis, but I'm guessing it's more due to Ty._

"Well, what do you know about the Reapers?" I asked. "Good a place to start as any." _Be nice if I could just say what _I _know, but no, that'd screw up the timeline and cause the AI to be pissed._

_At least if Ty takes me to some club, he might forget about visiting the consort instead._

"Nothing really, just vague references to an unstoppable force but that's about it."

"Aren't they supposedly some ancient race of machines that wiped out the protheans?" Hero risked putting out.

"According to the Geth." Tali said with a nod. I tried not to look but I thought she was staring at me from across the room- but unlike my version, it wasn't so much fear and distrust as...something else. I couldn't tell what through the mask, and there wasn't any body language to speak of- none I could use anyway.

"Alright second order of business, shoreleave. Who is with who? I don't want anyone getting left behind when it's time to leave the Citadel." Shepard looked around the room at everyone waiting for a response.

"What, we using the buddy system or something?" I said, not sure if she was serious or not.

"It's common procedure for ships where crew tends to be less than responsible", Kaidan threw out, rubbing his chin.

_I suppose this version would have a lesser opinion of the crew than Raptor. _

"Seems a bit like overkill." Hero commented. "But I'll martyr myself and go with Jason. Spare the rest of you."

I thought about flipping her off in response, but I figured if someone had to test out how hard she hit, I'd rather have it be Ty than me.

Ashley perked up, "I'll go with Ty."

_Not if I have anything to say about it. _"He's not exactly in a position to take shore leave." I pointed out. "And even if he wakes up in time to enjoy it, he'll probably be stuck in the medbay for at least a few days, if not longer."

Shepard grabbed a datapad off her seat and threw it my way. I snatched it from the air and glanced over it.

"Actually, it's fine. Chakwas said his brain activity is up and he was able to move his fingers on command a couple hours ago. By that information, he should be up in about half a day."

_And I don't know why I'm even slightly surprised. _"Then I've got just two words of advice Ashley. Bring earplugs."

"Alright, Wrex, you're with Kaidan. Garrus is with... scratch that. Wrex is with Tali and Garrus is with Kaidan."

I opened the link with Hero back up. _)You know, I'm actually glad you and I are paired up, given the alternatives.(_

_*Tali might not be so bad.*_

_)Regardless of what reality she's from, I doubt I'd be able to enjoy myself with her anywhere in proximity.(_

_*It wasn't your fault.*_

_)I doubt anything you say could change my mind on that one.(_

_^Hey, this is opened again? What are you talking about?^_

I closed it again, somewhat annoyed. I'd meant it to be just for Hero. After a moment, I opened it again. _)Chakwas says you should be up soon.(_

_^Okay, why don't you sound pleased?^_

_)For one thing, you're getting off easy. Seriously, my goddamn liver got replaced, and you probably won't even have a scar. Not to mention-(_

_*He's pissy because Ashley's paired with you for shore leave.*_

_^That blows.^_

Of the reactions I might have expected, that wasn't one of them. _)And what exactly do you mean by that?(_

_*Will you calm down? He's not dumb enough to try anything with 'your' girlfriend. Although I've yet to see you so much as talk to her.*_

_^I can't have a girl with me. Bourne, we were going to go clubbing and get three or four girls apiece.^_

_)Yeah, clearly I'm happy about it...and that was sarcasm, just to be clear.(_

_*Again, you've-*_

_)Lady, just because she looks like my Ashley, doesn't mean she is. It'd feel like a betrayal when I end up back in Raptor's universe.(_

_*Then why so possessive?*_

_)Just because my brain tells me she's not the same, my eyes aren't so easy to convince...also, when did I agree to 'four girls apiece?' Just cause you're on the market, doesn't mean I am.(_

_^So, you're saying that you don't want to be my wingman and have a kick ass time?^_

_)I'm saying I've got a girlfriend, so I'd only be going so I could get drunk. And at this point, that plan seems off the table anyway, unless Ashley decides she'd rather go with "Hannah" instead.(_

_^Huh, you know? I wonder if Danny can be my wingman like back in the real world or if there is a no touchy rule for him being a-^_

_)Dungeon master is what he called himself.(_

_*Did you even hear what Cecelia just said?*_

_)Hey, he called me.(_

I turned back to her, now looking at me intently. "Sorry, I missed that. What did you say?"

"I asked if you wanted to come with me and Hannah later. And assuming he's up by then, Ty."

"What for?"

"She didn't exactly get to bring her suitcase with her, and you and Ty don't have anything either. Or were you planning to go out in your armor?"

"Some ladies like a uniform." I said with a slight chuckle. )_She's not seriously talking about taking us shopping, is she?(_

_*What do you think?*_

_)Argh, help me out, how can I get out of this?(_

_*You know, some clothes of your own wouldn't be a bad thing. Pick out an actual style beyond just fatigues.*_

_)I should have known you'd take her side. Bloody double X chromosomes.(_

_^What's going on now?^_

_*Basically, since we've got nothing to wear but fatigues, Cecilia wants to help us correct that.*_

_)Why do I need anything else? I spend pretty much all my time on the ship anyway.(_

_*Wow, if Sovereign knew your biggest weakness was shopping-*_

_)Kinda like your weakness is cute drell?(_

_*...*_

_^I have no weakness.^_

_)Do you really want me to call you out on all your weaknesses?(_

"Yeah, when I was asking-" Cecelia said before either of them could reply. "-I wasn't actually asking."

_Big surprise._

**(You two should get big pink dresses.)**

**)Okay. What's your size?(**

**^You know, this never happened when I had my friends to back me up. If we didn't want to, we wouldn't.^**

**T117: Anyway, reader people: We're going to be questions next chapter, so if you've got em, now's the time to ask em.**

**(You guys have really kinda just been answering them as they've popped up.)**

**)Those've mostly been complaints though, not really big questions.(  
(Also, that thing these morons said about a new chapter every 20 reviews? They decided they're just doing three a week, Monday Wednesday Friday instead since that's simpler.)**

**S7: Yes we did. Now to the comment that asked if we were really annoyed with people for the constant negativity or just an act. We are really fucking annoyed with it. Don't get me wrong, the reviews for last chapter went swimmingly and everyone was seriously cool about it but prior to that we were getting a lot of 'this story isn't to my taste, change it or I'll pout like a five year old.'**

**^Yeah, you stated the stuff last time. Don't get too worked up about it.^**

**~Plus, people will get eventually that you both just don't give a shit about complaints and instead will have to actually think out their grievance reviews so that you will actually give them thought.~**

**(Yeah, what she said. And also what Layla said.)**

**S7: Iron, congratulations. You are going to be turned into a woman… a pregnant woman.**

**(...Uh-)**

**T117: I've told you before. Fix the door, I'll consider trying to talk him out of it.**

**(What? I did fix the damn...Bourne broke it again and blamed it on me, didn't he.)**

**)Nope. Must've been Hero.(**

***I considered it, but didn't...my money would be on Layla or Ty, just cause they know you'd take their word over Iron's.***

**T117: Any day of the week.**

**S7: Bam!**

**^Now, we would like everyone to remember that the next chapter will be out Friday. That means those of you that want live cash have until Monday.^**

**(Or- Oww! Come on, if you're going to stab me you could at least wait until I've finished the joke!)**

**)Hmm...nope.(**

**~You know, I'm surprised you never asked anyone to draw Cecelia as a catholic school girl.~**

**^... I need to make a call.^**

**S7: You know, I kinda want to see if our guy can do it.**

**T117: I...I'm not even going to comment on this one.**

**^C'mon, you kinda wanna see it.^**

**S7: I definitely want to see if someone can pull it off. then again, I could always commission it at Comicon… But, I want to see if our guy can do it first.**

**)I'd rather see one of Iron getting eaten by a thresher maw.(**

***That's…actually, that could be really funny if it was done right.***

**(Funny?!)**

**S7: Speaking of funny. I believe we all should remove our hats or pour out some liquor as Harold Ramis has passed away.**

**^Wait, Egon is dead?^**

**~Yeah, he passed away earlier this week.~**

**^But… but… What about Ghostbusters 3?^**

**S7: I think it's safe to say that it is being laid to rest in a coffin next to him.**

**T117:...Unless they just reboot it like every other franchise.**

**)...Dude. Ghostbusters is fucking classic. Don't tempt fate.(**

**^What have you taught us about tempting fate? When you tempt it then it will take the chance.^**

**)No, that's just cause Spike and Trebor love to be assholes to us.(**

**(You're not the one who-)**

**)I just got stabbed in the leg, so you can shut up about the stupid mountain.(**

**S7: Alright, well, we better go. 1473I2.**

**(Don't forget questions for 15.)**

**T117: For once, what Iron said. Sayonara. **


	15. New Outfits- Hooray?

**Shepard:**

Shepard stood by the changing rooms next to Hannah, fighting the urge to laugh. "Do you think they will like those outfits?"

"I can guarantee Jason won't. As for Ty, your guess is as good as mine." She answered with a shrug.

Shepard stifled a laugh. "I can say the same about him. Ty is one hell of a mystery."

"Which is sort of ironic, considering he's not the one with the perfect poker face and amnesia."

"You know, Bourne's past sounds like something a guy would tell me in the bar. Right after the pickup line."

"Is that your way of asking me if it's true?"

"I know it's true, still doesn't mean I believe it."

Hannah turned to face her. "From what I hear, your own past isn't all that full of sunshine

either."

"From what Liara and Bourne tell me, yours is full of Drell and Fornax."

"It was one time!" She said, throwing her arms up in exasperation.

Bourne's door opened up and he stepped through, "Have I mentioned yet that I'm still opposed to this idea?"

He looked down at himself. "And red really isn't exactly my color." He was currently wearing an outfit that Shepard had picked out for him. A red t-shirt with a black stripe going down the middle, and black jeans. He'd refused to let them pick out shoes, insisting on getting a pair of plain but durable boots."Seriously, at this point I'm half considering putting you both in stasis and getting drunk enough I won't feel the consequences."

Hannah opened her mouth, but closed it again as Ty's door opened. "Let's face it, I look like a boss."

Ty was wearing a black hoodie with a dark green t-shirt and jean shorts. "I'd say you look like someone from the millenium years." Cecilia said.

"And "like a boss" wasn't funny in its own time." Bourne said. "Just toss me the next outfit so we can get this over with sooner, or let me look for my own damn wardrobe."

Shepard tossed him the next outfit on the rack, "Ashley picked this one out."

He stormed back into the dressing room without even really looking at it.

Ty took off the jacket and just left the shirt on. "Hannah, what's your opinion of just shirt and shorts?"

She looked him over a moment, before just walking over to the rack and tossing another outfit to him.

"Damn it." He took it and stepped back into the room.

Shepard looked back at Hannah. "Guess we both have the same opinion on most of these clothes."

"Not quite. I wanted to warp it apart, but then I'd have to pay for it." She answered with a chuckle.

"I would have used incinerate on it."

"Trust me, knowing that you're the one actually generating the thing that does it is more satisfying than just hitting a button."

There was a loud flash from Ty's dressing room and he stepped out wearing a red shirt with a black zero in the center along with black pants. On top of that, he had the hoodie on with a red zero in the center. "How about now?"

"God, where do I start?" Hannah said with a shake of the head. "It's better than the last attempt, but the numbers...you know that those are zeros, right? And that there's all sorts of negative association with them?"

"Bourne has Omegas, I have zeroes. Along with this."

Ty smacked a black hat on the to-go-back rack into the air and caught it, using his nanites to turn it into a flat-bill with a red zero in the back. He then promptly put in on backwards and winked at her.

"This is me, take it cause you can't leave it."

Ashley stepped into the room before anyone could say anything else and her jaw dropped. "Oh you have got to be kidding me."

"Yeah, I know this isn't the smartest thing I've ever said-" they all whipped their heads to see Bourne now standing outside his dressing room, none of them having heard him emerge, "but Ashley has more fashion sense than all three of you combined."

He was wearing a dark gray shirt, simple blue jeans, and a black leather jacket that was currently unzipped. "This is simple, but elegant. Or something like that."

Ty crossed his arms. "Fine, what would make this look better?"

Ashley looked at him again and shook her head, "The jacket is too loose, pants are too long and the shirt is too loose."

He pressed his finger to his shoulder and made the pants a regular size, the jacket tightened around the waist, and the shirt went from a large to a medium. "Now?"

"Well, you could attract a turian... I think."

"Maybe one that was deaf." Bourne said with a chuckle.

"A turian?... A turian!? God, I look better than I ever did before. I fit in to all decades. It is exactly like it is from the eighties!"

Bourne and Hannah shared a look. "When he has to switch into something else, one of us distracts him while the other destroys that abomination" Bourne stage whispered.

"Agreed." The Adept whispered back.

Shepard leaned on the rack next to her. "Uh, it is the eighties. You sure you don't mean seventies?"

"He means the 1980s." Bourne said. "An interest in pre-relay culture is one of the few things we have in common."

Ty sat back. "And if there is one thing that I paid attention to that Casey Hudson said, it was that styles now are all very reminiscent to that of the nineteen-eighties."

Bourne's face didn't change, but his hands twitched towards fists, briefly enough that Shepard didn't think anyone else even noticed. "So, how many other outfits are you going to force us to try on? Because I think I have the perfect accessory for Ty: an old fashioned ski mask."

"So I can be a robber?"

Bourne looked at him a moment, before just shaking his head, grabbing another outfit with his biotics, and walking into the dressing room.

Ty didn't follow him and instead stood by Shepard. "Not changing into anything else."

"Do I have to make it an order?", She questioned.

"I think it'd be more effective to just threaten him." Bourne's voice came through the door. "Because we all know he's not going to listen otherwise."

"I don't know, there are other ways to convince me."

Shepard smiled, "I don't know, I actually like this outfit. Looks like you."

"Okay", Ty smacked his hand on the rack. "Bourne, hurry up. I can put an omega on anything you need."

He stepped out a moment later, clad in a similar set as before, but this time the jacket was light grey, the shirt was black, and the pants were brown. "I think this look actually works." He said, pulling his hand out from underneath the jacket. "A few of those shirts, both jackets, and I'm good."

Ty nodded and walked over to the racks and grabbed a heap of clothes off. 'I'll take all these.I can just manipulate them with the nanites."

Bourne looked at him a moment, then shrugged. "If it gets us out of here sooner, I'm just fine with that."

They all stepped up to the counter. "Okay, pay for your clothes."

Ty looked at Shepard. "What!?"

"Don't tell me you actually expected her to pay for you." Hannah and Bourne said in unison.

"Okay, not like I am poor or anything." Ty stepped up and paid for his clothes easily.

Shepard raised an eyebrow. "How much do you have?"

"Billions."

"If you say 'it's a user thing'", Bourne said, mocking him, "I might just snap and shoot you in the leg."

"No, I actually played the stock market with the money we got from all those jobs we pulled. Now, I have a nice amount of money."

Bourne shook his head in disgust.

"No need to be jealous Jason." Hannah said with a chuckle.

"I don't see you having a-" he cut off as she opened her omni-tool, apparently showing him her bank records. "How the hell did you get that many creds?" He put up a hand as she opened her mouth. "Forget it, I don't really want to know."

He brought up his own omni-tool. "Let's just pay and get out of here. I need a few of those black death cocktails from Flux."

Ashley pointed at the weapon store next to where they were. "Ty and I are going to check out the weapon store and meet you there."

"What?" Ty said suddenly outraged.

"Have fun with that." Bourne said stiffly. "I'm going to drop my stuff off on the Normandy and head to the bar."

"Yeah, good call." Hannah said, heading towards the door, Bourne on her heels.

Shepard watched as they all walked away and then started walking herself. "Well, I guess I finally can hear myself think... Shit."

**Ty:**

Ifelt my eyes droop as the boredom of looking at weapons overtook me. I was scrolling over the same weapon from ten minutes ago for the sixteenth time. Yet, whenever I looked over at Ashley she was deep in thought, comparing prices, models and rarities.

She suddenly sighed and turned to look at me. "So, your friend Bourne..."

"God, can I go ten minutes without someone mentioning him? It's like he is the popular guy." I said irritated by the fact that I had no blood alcohol content.

"Hey, he might not be as good looking with the scars, but, he's definitely... more mature."

I turned to her, leaning on the console, "So, what you're saying is 'You're good looking but your personality is a total put off.' Thanks Ashley, makes me feel so great right now."'

"Well, his personality is only one trait. Anyway, does he already have someone, or is he on the market?"

It took a second for me to get what she was saying but it hit me like a Krogan when I realized it. "You are into Jason?"

"I've caught him looking at me a few times. And maybe I've looked back once or twice."

"Uh, I think he's into you. Gets pissed if I so much as wink at you."

"Really?" She said, clearly surprised. "That would explain why he looked a little annoyed when I ended up paired with you."

"Bingo", a thought popped into my head "Oh my god, I have an idea."

"Is it a _good _idea, or am I going to want to switch partners after hearing it?"

"You should ask Bourne to dance."

She blinked in surprise. "Dance? Is he even going to be sober enough to do that? He sounded like he wanted to get a lot of alcohol in his system."

"Pft, Bourne has a super liver. He can drink whatever he want and not get drunk unless I tamper with the drink. Plus, if he says no, I can dance with you and show you how to do a country swing dance."

"Well, it's worth a shot." She said after a few moments thought.

"Do you know how to do a country swing?"

"Like you said, if Bourne turns me down...it'll be his loss."

I held up a finger, "No, I mean do you know how to swing dance? This is important."

She crossed her arms. "Do I look like the type of person who'd know how to swing dance?"

I shrugged, "Do I?"

"I guess that's a good point."

I gestured for her to talk, "So?"

"So, unless you plan on spreading that wealth around, let's get over there."

"Fine by me." I hit a button on my console and selected the item I wanted to buy. "Let me just get this and we can go."

**Bourne:**

Hero shook her head as she watched me. "You really are paranoid, aren't you?"

"After this long, I think I have a right to be." I said, tucking a few more knives into the inner pockets of my new jacket, and into my new boots. I'd wanted them pretty much for the sole purpose of being able to conceal them. I couldn't figure a way to make them stay up my sleeves though, and I suspected I'd have to jury-rig something, or go without.

"You can kill a person by clenching your fist, and you feel the need to-"

"You know, you said you were martyring yourself by going with me, but I'm starting to feel like I'm the one who's suffering."

As another crewmember approached, I switched to mental communication. _)Not to mention the fact that Ashley seems to have a thing for Ty.(_

_*And in about a million possible universes, she has a thing for Shepard.*_

_)That's different.(_

_*How?*_

_)Because, I'm not in them, and Ty isn't either.(_

_*Bourne, I know how you feel.*_

_)Really? You've been faced with a carbon copy of your girlfriend, yet also feel it isn't the same thing and feel sort of guilty when your mind runs in certain directions?(_

_*...Okay, maybe not exactly how you feel, but I know what it's like to feel like you've lost the person you care about. Or did you forget I watched mine get stabbed right before my eyes?*_

_)Yeah, and I paralyzed a friend saving mine. Point is...crap, I don't even know where to begin to try to explain it.(_

_*You feel an attraction to this version, feel like you're cheating on your version by doing so, and you're hurt because it seems like it's not you who've caught her eye this time.*_

_)...you left out the part about wanting to stab Ty everytime he looks at her.(_

I shook my head. _)All I know is that those cocktails can actually affect me at least a little bit, so I plan on drinking as many of them as I can and hoping they do the job.(_

_*I'd think you'd want her to be happy.*_

I shot her a skeptical look. _)Since when am I that selfless? You're the Hero here, not me.(_

She didn't respond to that one. "If you're done arming up, lets go. You aren't the only one in need of a drink."  
As we headed into the rapid transit cab a thought occurred to me. _)Speaking of drinking, which version of you did Ty bring out?(_

_*What do you mean?*_

_)Post lazarus or pre lazarus?(_

_*...I'm not sure, now that you mention it. I"ll have to ask Ty.* _Her face suddenly looked as though she'd been force fed lemons for a week. _*And it just occured to me that my Locust might be from that era too. And it's not like I can get thermal clips around here.*_

I thought about that as we flew there, and got an idea as we walked in. _)I might be able to help you modify it to the older system. I watched Shepard modify hers to take clips, so I ought to be able to reverse it, if we get a similar heat diffusion system from a pistol or assault rifle. Or we can just take it apart and talk to the quarter master. Maybe he could hook you up.(_

_*Couldn't Ty-*_

_)I don't think so. His specialty is armor. Danny was the weapon guy. If he shows up, I'll ask him about a couple heat system versions.(_

_*A couple?*_

_)Spare, plus one for me.(_

_*Right, because you don't already have enough weapons.*_

Hero was about to say something else but she was cut off as Ty slid into a seat at the table. "Hey, my two side-kicks. How's it going?"

"Ty, I am willing to call us equals. But I refuse to allow you to call me your sidekick." _)Also, why exactly do you get to be a goddamn billionaire while I've barely got enough to afford a bloody Avenger I?(_

"Alright, partner, I am actually here to see if... Hannah, would like to go dance with me."

I chuckled. "Unless you suddenly grow scales-" I was knocked out of my seat as she punched me in the arm.

"Would you like to make any drell comments?" She asked Ty as I got back up, massaging my shoulder, which I could tell would be bruised later.

_)So, in case anyone's curious, slightly harder than Raptor usually hit me but not nearly as hard as Cecelia.(_

"Uh, Hero, I mean Hannah. Ever done a country swing?"

"Dancing isn't really my forte." She said as a waitress reached our table.

"What can I get for you?" She asked.

"I'll take 3 black death cocktails, and yes I know I need to sign a waiver in order to drink them." She blinked in surprise at that one.

"Give me your finest batarian ale, and Hannah, I have special talents to teach you quickly. remember?"

_)So if you can program in just about any knowledge, why waste it on dancing, instead of a 5 dan black belt in every martial art or weapon modding and design or something?(_

_^Because, I need to know how to do it to transfer the knowledge. I took a swing class with my ex. Ergo, I know how to do a lot of swing dances and can transfer that knowledge.^_

"Know what, I'll try a black death myself." She said aloud.

"Hannah", Ty gave her a weird look like he was signaling something, "I really think you should let me teach you how to do a country swing."

_)As far as espionage goes- you suck. What are you up to? Also Hero, unless you did get the lazarused version, I'd suggest you order something else. The hangover would not be worth it.(_

_^Nothing, I just need Hero to dance with me.^_

She sighed. "Alright, I suppose one dance won't hurt." _*Also, he's got a point. Which version of my body did you give me?*_

Ty smiled, "Uh, I don't know. Now, I am going to make the Asari wish they had your ability to dance."

"Then go and do that then!" I said in exasperation. "Maybe if you get far enough away, you'll be out of my hearing range and I can drink in peace."

Ty snapped and all the dancers stopped as the song went from expel 10 to a Tim Mcgraw song. "Let's go!"

She stood up, and looked pointedly at me. "You touch my drink, and I won't be holding back with the punches."

I managed to fake a smile, not sure if she was serious or not. "I wouldn't dream of it old friend."

Ty took her hand and ran toward the dance floor, leaving me alone at the table. _About goddamn time._

I closed both of them off from my head, picking up a menu so I could look like I was reading it; I'd memorized the entire thing my first trip there.

"Ahem."

"Hello Ashley." I said without looking up. I'd also memorized what her footsteps sounded like, and heard her as she approached.

"How is it at the lone wolf table?"

"Quiet. It's a nice change." I chuckled as I set the menu down. "Find anything worth buying?"

She shrugged as she sat down. "Nothing I could afford."

_I'msurprised Ty didn't try to be a gentleman and offer to buy her something. Then again, he'd be more of a suicidal gentleman. _"Maybe Mr. Billionaire can spot you some credits."

Ashley looked over at him, "I think he is busy. He paying?"

"It was his idea, so I'd hope he is."

"Heh, so... how are you?"

I shrugged. "Been better, been worse."

"What's wrong? Jealous Ty is dancing with Hannah?"

I rolled my eyes as I turned to look at them. "Why would I be...jealous of..." I trailed off as I saw Ty and "Hannah" pretty much dominating the dance floor.

It wasn't so much that Ty was good that surprised me- though it did- but that Hero was. Shepard being a bad dancer was pretty much canon to me. The one time Raptor had tried at a celebration after defeating Saren, I'd had to literally charge out the door so I could laugh without her hearing me.

After a moment, I turned back to Ashley. "Yeah, dancing isn't really my thing." I shrugged. "Accidently stepping on your partner's foot is a lot worse with enhanced strength." It was a total lie, which I was hoping she wouldn't pick up on.

_*You know, Ty could probably 'teach' you how to do this, and then you could teach Ashley.*_

I was mildly surprised she could focus enough to say that, considering Ty had just swung her into the air and she almost kicked someone's jaw.

_)And how exactly would I be able to explain knowing how to dance a second after strongly implying I couldn't, and don't?(_

_^Just say that it was an excuse and you didn't want to disappoint her because you thought your dancing skills couldn't compare to me.^_

"Well, granted that was when I was first learning to dance." I said with a slight shrug, "So I guess I'm not as horrible as I used to be, but compared to those two-"

She cut me off by grabbing my arm and trying to pull me over. I could have resisted without too much effort, but after a moment I allowed her to lead me to the dance floor. ) _Why do I have got a bad feeling about this?(_

_*Relax Jason. How bad could it be?*_

_)Do I really need to give you an example?(_

The song ended with Ty lifting Hero into the air with her legs straight up. He didn't hold it for very long and brought her down fast. Everyone was quiet after the dance and he looked around expecting applause.

"Well, shit. Isn't that worth a cheer?"

_)Wow, someone's got an ego.(_

_^No, she has cybernetic implants. So, half the time she almost crushed my hands in hers.^_

_*Well, your little programming or not, I'm still not the most coordinated person when it comes to dancing.*_

_^So, what now?^_

I glanced at Ashley. "Do you really want to try following that performance?"

The look she gave me was a clear "yes."

_)Hero, you're the chick here. Advice?(_

_*Shopping, and dancing. And I thought Kryptonite was a dumb weakness.*_

_)You're not the only one here who can't dance without some serious help...hint hint.(_

"High five", Ty said as he stepped past.

I obliged him, and felt the momentary jolt as code surrounded our hands- too quickly for anyone else to notice.

"So, do you know how to dance like they were?"

"Guess now's the time to find out." I said, stepping onto the floor, and facing her. _)Ty? Music please.(_

_^Any requests?^_

_)I don't listen to a lot of country. Surprise me.(_

_^Beer for My Horses it is!^_

_*To be fair Jason, if you're surprised by his choice, you're an idiot.*_

Ty snapped his fingers and a guitar solo came over the club.

But the instant before he did, I suddenly felt a chill go through my spine, as I heard one of the people at the bar. It wasn't the tone, nor the volume that caught my attention- it was the way the voice seemed to be slightly distorted.

I let my body move on instinct, trusting it and Ty's code to take care of the dancing. As we moved, I tried to get a glimpse of the speaker, and a moment later my suspicions were confirmed as I saw a lone batarian at the counter, in blue armor. If it wasn't the same guy I'd tangled with back in my reality, it was close enough to put me on edge.

"You know-" Ashley said, bringing my attention back to what I was doing, and I was surprised to find myself currently holding her as she swung her legs in the air behind me. "You'd be more fun to dance with if you didn't look like you were in a trance or something."

I forced a smile onto my face as I set her back down, and we started spinning, connected only by our hands. "Sorry, it's been awhile since I did this. Didn't want one of us to land on our heads."

_)Ty, Hero, Batarian, bar, careful.( _I managed to send, not wanting to put my full concentration into the message and lose focus. It was an odd sensation to be moving almost without knowing how I would be moving- not quite like when Iron or Hero took over, or even all that unpleasant, but still odd.

_^Well, I will be right back then.^_

_)What-( _I had to cut off as what I was doing became more complicated.

_*Ty, what the hell are you doing?*_

_)Thanks.( _I managed to convey, unable to say much more.

He didn't reply but when we swung around I saw him toss up a beer bottle and catch it by the neck.

_*Just save some for me and Bourne.*_

_)Agreed.( _I said, lifting her into the air the same way Ty had lifted Hero for the finale. For a moment I thought it had just been harder than it looked, but then I realized that between being stronger and Ashley not being weighed down by cybernetics, it probably was a lot easier for me than him.

Suddenly I heard the batarian again- louder than before."Bah, human songs are they contain is more garbage about alcohol and intercourse. Makes me sick. 'Whiskey for my men' bah."

As I set Ashley down I looked over at him and saw Ty put a hand on his shoulder and say, "It's Beer for My Horses."

Ty swung his hand in and smashed a beer bottle in his face. The glass broke into shards and several stuck into his face. _^How's that for a fuck you?^_

_*A minus. Cut the song, and get ready for a fight.*_

I turned away from Ashley. "I think Ty may have just-" I cut off as I saw a group of mercs getting up from their tables, one of the batarians glowing with blue biotics.

"Ty! Heads up!" I threw my hand forward and threw the biotic against a wall.

Another merc followed him a moment later, glowing with purple biotics, and from the corner of my eye I could see Hero heading towards them, looking both irritated and determined.

I smiled, right as a Krogan started charging at Ty, head down to take advantage of his natural plates. I just slammed him into the ceiling, then into the ground, then repeated the pattern twice more.

I threw the Krogan off to the side- figuring I could deal with him in a minute if he was even still able to stand- and glanced over at Ty and Ashley. The latter had one of them, a human, in a choke hold. Ty was surrounded by three frozen mercs and suddenly shattered them with an overload. It was a lot more cold blooded than I had typically seen him act, and I noticed the zero on his chest had cybernetic veins growing off it again.

I couldn't take the time to deal with it, because a Turian was suddenly coming at me with a knife. I rolled backwards, pulling a knife from each boot as I did so, and popping them as I stood up.

He was surprised, having expected an unarmed opponent, and I threw one of them at his eye hilt first. He clutched a hand to his face in pain, but managed a blind swipe with the knife.

Blocking it was child's play. I grabbed his wrist with my other hand, and stuck my knife in at the wrist joint, where there was less armor. His knife fell from nerveless fingers, and I kicked him in the head; I'd picked boots with metal around the edge for pretty much that exact reason. He slumped over, out cold.

I turned to see if anyone was left- and was face to face with a glowing purple Krogan. I glanced over at Hero. _*I figured you needed the exercise more than I do.*_

I backed up a few steps and nodded. The Krogan was suddenly charging at me, free of the stasis field. I rolled to the side, and he only barely avoided hitting a wall, slowing down at the last minute and turning to face me.

I clenched my fist, and held my omni-saw in front of me. As he charged, I darted to the side and thrust my arm to the side, hoping to cut him to ribbons. It suddenly flickered and died, and it felt like my head was going to implode from the sudden pressure.

I grimaced, guessing that things had just shifted to Ty's favor, like they had on Therum. _)Never thought I'd say this, but I could use some backup.(_

I was suddenly shoved in the small of the back, and I risked a glance back, hoping the Krogan wouldn't hit me while I was looking away. Nothing was there but when I looked back, Ty was on the hump of the Krogan chopping down on him with a bloody weapon.

I pulled out my Assassin and fired a round right into the Krogan's head, finishing him off. A split second later, I felt a sharp pain in my right leg, and it suddenly was unable to hold my weight. I stumbled, barely able to balance on one leg, and looked down to see a knife sticking out the side of my knee- held by the Turian I thought I'd knocked out.

I shot him in the head with a muttered curse, then looked back at Ty, expecting another comment about losing 'style points' for just shooting the Krogan in the head. He just looked at me with a determined grin and then pulled his arms in close. He glowed green, like he had back on the shuttle after he'd been stabbed, and I knew what was coming, instinctively throwing up a barrier. Power exploded outward and knocked all the fighters down- including Hero and I. The rest of them were knocked unconscious, but between me being genetically enhanced and the lazarus tech Hero had, we were able to shrug it off.

She groaned as she got back to her feet. _*I'll throw a singularity at him if you detonate it.*_

_)As soon as the room stops spinning.( _

Ty was over me and he grabbed my arm. _^You have no chance against me right now.^_

I let him pull me to my feet, and staggered. A glance down at the knife in my leg made me reluctantly concede the point. _)When's this thing going to shift in my favor for once?( _I asked rhetorically.

_*We better get that leg patched up.*_

"I don't know that I'm going to be able to walk very well with this thing." I commented. A quick glance around out of habit showed that Ty's stunt had also knocked out the bartender and waitresses- as well as anyone else in the club.

I looked back at Ty, another thought having occurred to me: If he went deranged like he had with the Krogan, or the Turian back when we rescued Tali.._.even with Hero there's no way I'd be able to beat him. _

_^So, I have that song memorized and I also have it sung by Toby Keith. Who wants to listen to it on our way to the clinic?_^

I gave him an annoyed look. But looking around, I agreed with him on the clinic part; Shepard would have our heads on a plate if we went to Chakwas and she found out about this.

_)You know, normally I'd have a comment on how idiotic it was to attack that guy and start a fight...but I can make an exception here.(_

_*If there's going to be a fight anyway, might as well strike first.*_

_)That too.(_

Hero came over and I threw my arm around her shoulder, favoring my good leg. _)Good thing you got the Lazarus version.(  
*Yeah, you're still not a lightweight.*_

I looked over at Ty. "Any chance we can use a glitch hop so we don't have to go as far?"

"In the middle of the wards?" Hero questioned. "Where everyone can see and wonder what the hell just happened?"

"Dude, I would totally say yes... but I think I knocked out Ashley back there. So, I will just leave Hero to take up her burden and I will go grab her." Ty let go and took off to a pile of bodies. He moved a few out of the way and picked the Marine out of it.

_)You do realize that if you-(  
*How exactly would you even hurt him when you can barely stand?*_

_)I'd have to get creative.(_

_^Grow the fuck up Bourne. What is this High School? I didn't knock her out on purpose and I did it so you wouldn't die.^_

I raised an eyebrow at the latter part. "I fail to see how a dead turian was going to kill me."

"The knife stabbed your femoral artery... What? I've seen Black Hawk down enough to know that it is in that general area. On top of that, only an artery gushes blood like that."

I looked down at my leg. Although the knife was plugging the wound and lessening the bleeding and it wasn't quite gushing..."Yeah, alright, maybe."

I glanced back at him, slightly amused. "But when I got stabbed in the side I was able to kill that battlemaster, a Geth, then sprint back to the Normandy, throw Shepard and the others onto it, fell several stories before being hauled onboard with biotics, and still didn't pass out until the poison hit me...So you may have overreacted. Appreciate the thought though."

"Or, maybe the fact that you are some form of Deadpool makes the difference. Because a normal human couldn't do that."

As we started walking- or in my case limping- down the stairs, I chuckled. "And what makes you think I'm a normal human? Genemods, remember?"

Ty shook his head and continued walking. "You know, I'm just glad I have the level of power to pull the shit that I did back there. I mean, I had Tali sort of on my arm last time and could never explode like that."

"Most people wouldn't complain because they didn't blow up." I said with a chuckle. "Okay, I may be starting to feel the blood loss right now."

"Good thing the clinic is right down the lane. Lets go."

"By the way- what the hell were you beating that Krogan with? One of those guys go all cliche and bring a pipe?" I asked with another chuckle- both got me an odd look from an Asari that was walking by.

Ty reached to the back of his pants and pulled out a high tech looking tomahawk. "Well, you have knives. So I grabbed this at the weapon's store. I can send my tech powers through it and give it a nice bite."

I groaned. "Ah shit, I just realized I never retrieved my knives."

"Right. Because you don't have a few hundred more back on the ship." Hero answered.

I thought about telling her to go find a drell to make out with...but then realized she could easily drop me and send me on my ass. _Probably better to just keep my mouth shut_

**(Hah! Not so fun when it's you getting hurt, is it Bourne?)**

**^Says the guy who is going to be a pregnant woman.^**

**(You're the one who just danced with...wow, "Hannah" just broke Bourne's record for greatest death glare…and she's continuing to set it as I speak.)**

**S7: It's still a better name than Hero.**

**T117:...I'm right here you know. **

**)Yeah, and since I'm technically responsible for that name too…(**

***Iron was a stupid name though.***

**T117: Agreed. )Agreed.(**

**S7: Pretty much all of your names suck and you had to steal your main character's.**

**^Mine may be two letters but it is still better than any of theirs.^**

**~Yeah, Spike is the one that came up with Cecelia's name.~**

**T117: Yeah, that's all deliberate though. You really want to try to bring realism into this kinda story?**

**S7: With what is later down the road no. But that wasn't deliberate. You picked his name to be Jason Bourne before you knew that he lost his memory.**

**T117:...Well, I didn't want to use my real name, and I didn't want him using his real name, so I had to pick something, and I was just starting to read those books, so...here we are.**

**)Speaking of here- it's chapter 15, and we got a question. Is this taking place between ME and ME2 or-(**

**T117: Possible spoilers with this answer, but no. We wanted to keep things accessible for Glitched and SaWoF even if people hadn't read UiaWoF. **

**^Question 2: Is Tali the AI?^**

**S7:... Maybe yes, maybe no. We haven't even decided who the AI is. You see, my story has a very hands on unnatural force while Trebor's is an unseen law. So, we are still figuring that out.**

**T117: For the most part I like his idea, but since I'd rather not spoil it and and I still want to work with it a little bit- not much, just a little-...Anyway, next question?**

**~Next, is my argument to jaelin910. 1 is not the most uncommon instance when dividing by infinity because everything leads down to 1. Each instance becomes its own end thus creating a 1. the most uncommon instance is 2 because an instance so rarely happens just twice that it is more common for it to happen once or more than three. You see, each one of those infinite scenarios all lead to it's own instance, it's own 1 if you will. But, an instance that happens just twice is unheard of to this day.~**

**T117:...Iron, can you field this next one while Bourne, Hero and I go take some aspirin for the sudden headache reading that gave us?**

**(Why put me in charge?)**

**)You're so insane, that logic and math like that wouldn't affect you at all.(**

**(Yeah, good point. Okay, next question is from revanchists unite...****I'm ****the only character you were able to relate to?...either ya'll are trolling, or you need some serious therapy. As for if I'm alive in-story or not...That kinda changes every five minutes cause Trebor's a little bitch about his stupid door…You're standing behind me now, aren't you.)  
T117: Yep. **

**(And now Bourne's going to stab me in the kidney, right?)**

**)Yep.(**

**(Well, let's get it over wit-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! That wasn't a kidney!)**

**)And I also didn't stab you.(**

**T117: Okay, two from masterdude94. The first is why we chose Hannah as a fake name for Hero…she says pretty much exactly why in that chapter. She's got the spacer background, so it was her mom's name.**

**S7: More like Trebor didn't want to go with any of the names I or Ty was suggesting because he was beginning to feel inadequate. How many chapters will it blah blah blah. If you want a status report we are at 67 and haven't even gotten to the fourth core world.**

**T117: At this point, I'd guess probably 90 chapters min, 110-115 max.**

**S7: But… we are including DLC like Bring Down the Sky.**

**T117: And there'll be plenty of original fights and whatnot too. None of the chapters are really filler stuff, and most of them are at least four or five thousand words long, if not more.**

**S7: Actually, I did a test. Average chapter length was about 7,541 words.**

**T117: Even better.**

**(And since these morons leave the ANs till the last minute, the length of those isn't taken into account. So it could end up at 8000 or more with that.)**

**~What's worse, is that sometimes they write the next three author's notes so no one's questions get answered until a random ass chapter.~**

**T117: Well, maybe they should ask questions sooner or something. The system works as is.**

**(*Cough* Bull *Cough*)**

**T117: Anyway, that's all the questions for now, so we should wrap this up.**

**~Remember, you have until chapter 17 for the fan art contest.~**

**S7: 1473I2.**

**T117: Sayonara.**


	16. Heroes Can Suck It

**Ty:**

"You know, I can honestly say it's 1000 times more fun to stab someone else then to have someone else stab you." Bourne commented as we rounded a corner, the sign for the clinic just ahead of us.

I just ignored him and looked to Hero, "So after we get done with these two, want to go hit Chora's Den up? I know the manager there."

"Didn't Cecelia shoot the manager?" Bourne said with a slight chuckle. "Damn, this bleeding out thing works a lot better without adrenaline keeping me focused...does anyone else feel like their head's about to split? Because that doesn't seem like the normal reaction to being stabbed."

"No, I meant I was just going to put some fake memories into the manager's head and make him think he owes me free drinks for life."

Hero shot me a disapproving look. "You do realize how much Bourne and I had our memories messed with? And how much we tend to hate the idea of someone doing something like that?"

"Do you know how much I just don't care? They are all programs anyway. No matter how bad you want to believe otherwise." Saying those words hurt but I needed to remember that myself.

"Bourne, can you stand on your own for a minute?" She asked.

"I think so."

She slammed her fist into my chest full force, and put a bit of biotic energy behind it too. I was only barely able to keep my balance. "I don't care if they're programs, real people, or goddam robots." She pointed at herself. "Are you calling me and Bourne programs? Because last I checked, we aren't." She pointed at Ashley. "Are you saying that she's nothing more than a bunch of code? That Thane was nothing more than code?" The way her eyes blazed was identical to Bourne's.  
"Feel free to hurt him more, but uh, bleeding out over here, remember?" Bourne commented, leaning against the wall to watch.

I turned to the side and let Ashley drop to the ground, "Fuck you guys. I am out of here."

With that I turned and walked away. I managed forcing focus so that if they tried any biotics on me I could nullify them.

_)Jeez, what crawled up your ass and died?(_

_*Probably pissed because he didn't get any of his precious alcohol. I didn't either, but I'm not ready to abandon my friends just because of that.*_

_^Last I checked, Bourne made it clear we weren't friends. I was just useful to you. And now, I am going to find my actual friend and see if we can't have a good time.^_

Hero took step towards me, but stopped. _*If he didn't consider you a friend-*_

_)Oi! You going to help me in there, or am I going to have to crawl the rest of the way? Also, he dropped Ashley in the middle of the walkway, and people are having to step over her, so maybe we should move her too. Whew, I am really starting to feel lightheaded now.(_

_^Bye.^ _I dissolved the connection and continued on. I rounded the corner in the shops and saw my favorite Volus salesman. Stepping up to the counter and he looked at me strange.

"How are you earth clan?"

I looked back the way I came. "Not too good, show me your human armors."

He pulled up his pad and sat it on the table, "Here you go."

I began sifting through the armors and looked for one that I could use now that my new set had a hole in the back courtesy of the krogan back on therum.I saw a few sets and began wishing I could find a suit that wouldn't look too off with the zero. That's when I saw a set of Colossus armor VI.

"This should last me a while", I hit the buy button and handed it back to the volus.

He picked up a case and sat it on the table. "Here, now leave and make way for the other customers."

I wasn't in the mood for his back talk so I leaned over the counter and pushed him back so he fell on his back. "Fuck you suit rat!"

Turning to the side, I took up the box and began to walk away when I saw Shepard talking to Conrad Verner. She looked distressed and annoyed out of her mind. Feeling that she was in serious need of some help, I hiked up the crate and walked over to her.

"Hey Shepard, I think the others need you at the clinic. Bourne got stabbed and Ashley was knocked out."

Shepard let a thankful smile and then switched her look to worry. "Shit, we better get over there."

I pointed down the walkway. "Yeah, you better get over there."

"Have to talk some other time, Conrad." She said, already fast walking away from him.

"I'll catch you at the ship, I need to run to Chora's Den." I said trying to step by her.

"Keep walking with me for a minute, it'll be more convincing if you look worried." She said, grabbing me by the shoulder and pulling me along. "Once we're out of sight we can head over there."

"You sure you don't want to check on Bourne and Ashley", I questioned.

"Better effort, but I don't think it matters. I doubt he can hear us from here."

I laughed a little, "I wasn't joking. I... we got into a bar fight and Bourne got stabbed."

She looked at me for a minute before picking up the pace significantly. "And you just left him there alone?"

"I kind of had a fight with Hannah that left me dropping Ashley and walking away." I admitted it to her and waited for the punch.

It wasn't long in coming, and made "Hannah's" seem like a mild tap in comparison. It knocked me flat on my ass, and she stood over me murderously. "You know, I don't care that you got in a fight, or even that you decided to pick a fight with the biotic who can tie you in a knot. But if you ever abandon your partner again...I'll take up Bourne's offer about borrowing his knives."

She stood over me as I got back to my feet, then started walking before I could say anything. I tightened my hat on and got up quickly and caught up to her. "Why do you keep hitting me over leaving the team?"

She held her arm out so I walked into it. "It's the easiest way to get yourself killed." She said simply, already moving again.

I rolled my eyes and walked with her into the clinic. Standing outside the door to the operating room was Hero. I tried to avert my eyes but caught her giving me a death glare, eyes glowing with menace.

"Sup' Bitch?" I threw out in the most disrespectful tone possible.

She walked over, biotic cornea surrounding her. "The only reason I'm not currently breaking every bone in your body is because the Doctor already has enough to deal with."

I raised an eyebrow and surrounded myself with a green matrix aura. "Is it really that or have you figured out that right now the sway is in my favor and you are like a fly in my soup. Face it Hannah, I can rip you apart by your smallest bit of _code_." I put as much emphasis on the word code as I could.

She considered me coldly. "You know something? Deep down, Bourne does consider you a friend. If he hadn't, then you would have been the fly- crushed by a rock before the poison even entered your bloodstream." She turned her back on me before I could reply. "Get lost then, if you don't want to be associated with us mere mortals. And this time, stay gone." She entered the other room, still glowing purple.

"What did you do to piss her off?" Cecelia questioned. "She doesn't seem the type to threaten to murder someone in cold blood. That's more my or Bourne's thing."

I rubbed my chest where she punched me. "I just gave her a reality check she is hoping isn't true."

She leaned against the wall, arms crossed. "What about?"

I leaned against the other wall. "Things that I have learned due to my nanites. Lets leave it at that."

"You know, she and Bourne seem pretty close. I would have thought you were in that little circle too."

I clenched my fist in my hand and just let the power I had surge through me. "I was the tangent to that circle. She of all people would never let me in."

She gave me a calculating look. "And what about Bourne? She had that much right. Him saving your life and all. Not to mention stopping that rocket back on Eden Prime when you armor turned to shit." She glanced at the closed door. "He might not show it, but I bet he'd throw himself in front of a rocket for you. He cares more about others than he does about himself." She made a disgusted noise. "Small wonder his face looks like it does."

I sunk down on the wall till I was sitting, "He might respect me, but he has never called me friend."

She laughed. "Now you sound like a high schooler fretting over the L word."

"Shepard, I was kicked off my ship the last guy that I thought was my friend. He didn't call me a friend but I called him one. So excuse me if I am acting like a high schooler fretting over love. But unlike that, a friend is real while love is just some bull that corporations made up to sell cards one day a year."

She raised an eyebrow. "Touched a nerve did I?" She shook her head. "What do you think really says "I'm your friend" more? Saying it, or showing it?"

"Neither, you need both to convince me."

She rolled her eyes as she sat down on a table nearby. "So how'd you end up pissing off an entire bar?" She asked with a slight smile.

I smirked, "Smashed a batarian in the head with a bottle."

Her smile vanished instantly. "Did you manage to kill the bastard?"

"Nah, just gave him a few lacerations and knocked him out."

She gave me a disgusted look. After a long and uncomfortable silence, she turned back to the door, muttering under her breath.

I felt all the power I had flood out of me and I began to have a real craving for pie, "Shit."

**Bourne:**

Hannah and I both glared at Ty's retreating back. I would have spit if I'd had the energy, and hadn't been so light headed.

"Come on, we don't need him." She said, simultaneously supporting me while lifting Ashley into the air ahead of us. "Let's just get in there."

I nodded across the mental link, figuring it was a bad idea to do it in reality.

The Doctor looked up from her desk as we walked in, and rushed over as she took in the blood that had begun to gush down my leg.

"What happened to you?" She asked, accent especially pronounced as she led us into a back room.

"Our idiot shipmate pissed off a merc and ran off." Hero said, the venom in her voice taking us both by surprise.

I winced slightly as she helped me sit down on a table, the knife feeling like it was digging into my leg more.

"He's lost a lot of blood." She commented, grabbing an IV. I briefly wondered if Ty was afraid of needles as she inserted it into my arm. "How badly does it hurt?"

"Less than I'd have thought...though my head's in the clouds right now."

She grabbed a bag to hook it up, but I held up my hand to stop her. "Long story short, I'm kinda resistant to that sort of stuff. Save it for the folks who it'll actually help."

After a moment she nodded and instead pulled out a syringe. "Do you know your blood type?"  
I opened my mouth, then immediately closed it, and exchanged a look with Hero.

_)How the hell do I not know that?( _I shook my head.

"I'll have to do a quick test then." She said, grabbing my arm so she could find a good vein.

"If you don't mind-" She said to Hero "-Could you please wait outside so I have room to work."

"Of course." She said, walking out. Even without the link established, I got the feeling if Ty were to walk in, she'd want to break every bone in his body.

The doctor looked up at me. "So pain meds won't help you?"

"Not unless you have enough for about five people." I shook my head. "Don't bother wasting it. I've had worse."

She looked at the knife, then back at me. "I'm going to have to remove this to apply medigel to the wound."

"Like I said, I've had-" I cut off as I heard Hero's voice, and half reached for a knife due to the tone of her voice.

She literally stormed back in, glowing purple. "He has a lot of nerve coming here." She sat down on a table angrily.

I didn't need to ask who, but agreed. I checked the barrier between him and myself, and slammed it shut as thickly as I could.

_*He's like a child given a god's powers- almost worse than the reapers.*_

I looked at her in surprise, which also helped me block out the pain as Doctor Michel started working the knife out of my leg, trying not to make it worse.

_*Don't look at me like that, you know it's true. At least they have an actual reason behind what they do- as badly as the logic holds up. And Iron at least had the excuse of insanity.*_

I was silent a moment. _)You...you don't think he could be right, do you?(_

_*No. I don't. I'm a hell of a lot more than code, and so are you, and so is the person currently- ouch, that looked painful.*_

_)I take it now would be a bad time to look?(_

_*Very. I'm amazed you're still conscious.*_

_)I have the cipher to compare it with. Among other things.(_

She was silent a moment more, hate still boiling under the calm surface.

_)You don't really think he's that bad?(_

_*He treats this like it's all a game!*_

_)...well, technically-(  
*You know very well what I mean, so don't even say it.*_

I thought about what I knew about him for a few minutes, occasionally wincing as Doctor Michel did something. _)I think...I think its his way of coping. I mean, think about it. You said when I woke up in Saren's lab, I freaked out pretty badly too. If I hadn't had repressed memories, I'd have done the same thing when I woke up on Eden Prime.(_

_*You might have taken on a Krogan solo, but you didn't try to get those "Style Points" he's constantly talking about. And you certainly didn't just justify taking lives as "they're just code"...only one other person we've known was ever that cold blooded about it. Well, him and the crazy murderous bitch that held Ty's hand half the time he was in the medbay.*_

She didn't even have to say the name for me to know who she meant.. _)He's dead. Ty isn't. Sigh. Look, I get what you're going through.(_

_*You know what he said to me just now? He said that he could rip me apart by my smallest bit of code.* _She pulled her knees to her chest, hugging them. _*You at least know what you are. I could be nothing more than a program, a bunch of math.*_

I couldn't help a shiver at that, remembering how he'd just touched me and almost opened Iron's file. _*It's...my whole life, I was so sure of myself. I made mistakes, but I never doubted what I could really do. Then I threw myself into that green beam, and the next thing I knew, I was in your head, and you showed me that all my life was nothing more than a game for entertainment.*_

I honestly couldn't think of how to respond to that.

_*Even if he's right, I still hate him for it.*_

The door suddenly opened and Shepard stepped in dragging Ty behind her. If I'd been able to, I might have sent a knife into my hand. "Bourne, being a little bitch about a booboo?"

"Go to hell. And take him with you."

Hannah made a sound that was clearly agreement.

Ty crossed his arms and turned to leave. "Sounds good to me, maybe the devil can buy me drinks."

Shepard caught his collar and held him back. "No, Bourne, you are here and we need to stick together."

I laughed harshly. "The only reason I'd stay near him is so-"

The doctor cleared her throat to get our attention. "Do either of you know your blood types? I'm running a bit short on B+."

Ty raised his hand.

"Okay, can everyone leave while I hook them up."

I grit my teeth. "I'd rather bleed out than-"  
"Will you grow the fuck up Bourne?" Cecelia cut me off. "And that goes for you too Ty. You are going to stay here and make nice, or so help me I'll blast you both out an airlock!"

_*Doesn't leave much room for argument, does she?* _Hero commented as she headed for the door.

Ty sat down as the doctor hooked him up. "Fine, not like I would have said no anyway." The line went directly into my arm, much to my surprise. I assumed that there had been some advances in blood work and didn't comment.

She was silent until the door was closed, then she turned to look at me. "For the record, your blood type is AB+. Just for future reference."

I blinked in surprise. That meant I could get blood from anyone."Then why would you need Ty..." I cut myself off, realizing that now, it was just the two of us, and her. And given Hero's current feelings, it seemed a little too coincidental that she'd just "happened" to have blocked us both out and left without any real complaint.

Ty voiced my thoughts almost word for word. "Well shit, you must be the story AI."

She nodded and looked between us. "You sure have made a good mess of things."

"Can I just take this moment to thank you for not being an Asari Hooker?...what? I've lost like 15% of my blood supply or something, I'm not exactly right in the head...stop looking at me like that!"

She snapped her fingers and a viewing screen popped up by her head, "Look, we have a problem. A big one."

I nodded. "Yeah, Danny filled us in."

"Yeah, there is one woman out there who is bearable and another that has gone from goody two shoes to colossus sized bitch."

"Gee, wonder who's fault that could be." I said as sarcastically as possible.

"Go suck a dick Bourne. Now, what is the problem?"

I looked at her and she was shaking her head. "I can already tell this was a bad idea putting you two together. Now, your problem that you left at the bottom of a cave, he's gotten out and wants to kill you."

We exchanged looks, and for once it was clear we were thinking the exact same thing. "What?!"

I tried reaching out to Hero to tell her to get in here, but found she was still blocking me. _Or it's her fault. _I thought, looking at the AI. "How exactly did that murderous fucked up spawn of an ape and a whore escape having a volcano collapse on his head?"

"He is a lot stronger than you think Bourne. Stronger than you. Now, Ty, your problem has probably already occurred to you. Saren remembers his last loss as well."

"I think I figured that out before he did." I commented, relishing the look he gave me. "I don't see the problem. Since Mr. "User" over there can just 'tear Iron apart by the smallest bits of his code'." I laughed harshly. "All I've got is a few biotic tricks and knives."

Ty huffed and squeezed his hand a little harder, and sending more blood into my arm at a rate that made it sting. "Saren, can do what I do and to the same degree that I can when the universe is swaying toward me... all the time."

That made my smile fade. "You know, I'm starting to wish I'd never met any of you."

"Even Ashley?" The AI commented, and I directed my glare towards her. "And you're forgetting your other ability."

I exchanged a look with Ty. "The last time reality was warped in the slightest, all it did was nearly get him killed because it turned his armor from Mjolnir to crap."

She snapped her fingers again, "This is where you are headed if you keep up this path."

_Well, that's never a good sign._

The screen showed Ty and I standing side by side on one of the citadel bridges firing off everything we had at Geth. Still, no matter how much we fired off at them, they kept coming. Eventually, I saw a hopper leap onto my back. I dropped down from the force it hit me with and it blasted away. Directly after that, a destroyer charged in and blasted Ty with a carnage shot. He burst into flames and dropped to the ground screaming in pain. The Geth then overtook us and I lost track of us in the swarm.  
"Well, I have seen worse." Ty said looking horrified.

The view suddenly shifted to me, lying on my stomach in the Normandy's medbay, Raptor and Ashley standing over me. They exchanged horrible looks as my vitals abruptly bottomed out.

A split second later, the screen showed Ty, appearing in front of his friends only to suddenly explode in a burst of matrix code, Saren stepping out of where he'd been.

"You were saying?" She asked, crossing her arms.

I forced myself to look, though the look on Ashley's face made me wish the thing would vanish. A moment later, I felt an odd sensation as something radiated outward from me- not my biotics, and it wasn't visible. The only sign that anything had happened was the way the screen disappeared, and Ty and the AI both suddenly clutched at their heads.

I grimaced. "Yeah, clearly I'll be a real 'asset' to the team if I do that to him whenever my powers decide to actually work."

Ty was surrounded by code for a second and then looked better, but still pale and weak. "This blows."

"Gee, you figure that all by yourself?" I snapped, rubbing my temples. Not a good day. My worst enemy alive, my second worse enemy more powerful than he was before, and on top of that, the two us apparently headed for certain doom without me ever getting to see my girlfriend or best friend again.

"That pretty much sums it up." The AI said, and I suddenly realized I'd spoken aloud.

I turned to glare at her. "So, do you have any _good _news?"

"The civil AI is the consort. She seemed eager to give you some help."

I facepalmed. "Do AI not know the definition of "good?"  
Ty ripped the needle from his arm and started walking to the door. "I'll go see her since Bourne doesn't want to."

"Damn straight I don't." I growled, ripping the needle from my own arm. "But if I have to lose some dignity to get some goddamn answers, so be it."

"Probably would help you loosen up a little." The AI chuckled. I flipped her the bird behind my back as I walked out.

As Ty stepped out he fell to his knees and bent over. "Damnit, I'm good, I'm good."

I looked at him, wondering what the hell he was talking about. Then I looked up at Cecelia, right as her fist hit me square in the jaw, knocking me flat on my back.

"Have the two of you resolved your little spat?" She asked sweetly.

I glared at her as I got to my feet. "We're working on it." I said, hiding a knife in my hand in case she didn't like that answer.

Ty stood up and was swaying, "It really isn't between him and I much as it is Hannah and I."

"In that case, I suppose it'll stay unresolved." She said coldly, walking out the door before any of us could react.

"You really aren't very good with the ladies, are you?" Cecelia commented, looking at the doorway in a way I knew meant there'd be hell to pay later for Hero. _Actually, I kinda want to see that._

Ty spit off to the side and began walking toward the door. "Who needs them. All they do is hold you back and steal four years of your life away."

_)You do realize we're now heading to a prostitute, right? So that sounds especially...( _I trailed off, trying to think of a word.

"Well, if that's the case, I'm reassigning Ashley as Hannah's partner, and Bourne as yours." She said. "And where exactly is she anyway?"  
Ty just kept walking without turning back, "Asleep in the clinic."

I shook my head and followed him. _)Look, even if we don't like this, we're apparently stuck with each other so we might as well get used to it. And Hero's tied to this to, so maybe you could talk to her and not be-(_

_^When the sway is back in the center, I will take her on for a match in the simulator. Get some aggression out.^_

That sounded like anything but a good idea, but I didn't have another one so I didn't comment. _)So this...Civil AI. What good could she really be? Doesn't she only-(_

_^She is the AI for all the civilians around. Last time, she awarded Danny the power to jump into glitches.^_

_)Again, how does that help us? ...Unless she's going to fix the saw so it actually survives all these...sway shifts. It went from you to the center, it stopped working. It went from the center to code, it stopped working. And I'll bet if it been working when it went to me, it'd have disappeared from existence all together...goddamn I wish I could say that was our biggest worry.(_

Ty just pushed on and kept walking to the elevator. _^Why does it seem like everyone is throwing women in my face?^_

I almost charged in behind him, not wanting to have the doors close on me and force me to wait for an eternity. _)As I recall, you said something about "three or four women apiece."(_

_^That was a joke, I'm talking about Shepard. Love and women, for some reason she talked to me about it and got a bit too interested. Or maybe I am just going crazy thanks to this sway deal.^_

_)...you think that she's into you?!( _

He stopped and looked at me oddly. _^You're kidding me?^_

I considered it for a moment. _)Well, I think Hero said something about her holding your hand in the medbay when you were out cold.(_

_^I assumed that was because she was waiting for me to wake up so she could belt me one.^_

_)Also a possibility.( _I admitted, though looking back, I was coming up with a few other instances that could have indicated she had a thing for him. I had to suppress a shudder at the thought.

"Ever think of a theme song for yourself?" He spoke out loud.

"Huh?" I said, currently trying to get the image out of my mind, without much luck. "A what?"

"Well, you know, we are intergalactic badasses now. And when you are an intergalactic badass, you get a theme song."

I shot him a skeptical look. "How is it you can go from total dick to being all buddy buddy again?...and only when speaking aloud do I realize how hypocritical that sounded."

He smiled and leaned against the elevator wall, "I think that mine would be something awesome, like the Catalyst."

I shrugged. "I dunno, maybe Enter Sandman? Sorta fits with the whole 'exit light, enter night thing'"."

He rolled his eyes, "Lame, you are anything but subtle and the Sandman is subtle."

"Heh, guess I can't really argue with that one." I thought for a few moments. "Maybe Eye of the Tiger?...nah, too cliched." I shrugged. "You're a little easier to figure out in that respect, considering you've got about 100 times as many memories as I do."

He thought for a moment, "You could always say it's Cotten Eye Joe."

"No." I shook my head. "You know one other thing I've got to wonder? What the heck am I? I mean, you're User, but there's not really a word for what I do."

He laughed after a moment, "Then you're still figuring yourself out. You can use Taylor Swift's song 16."

"15, actually. And that's still not quite it... why aren't there any songs about seriously trained killers with memory loss?"

"I don't know which I'm more disgusted by. The fact that you know enough about Taylor Swift to correct me or you are wondering about songs related to psychos."

"On the first part, I've got a perfect honking memory with stuff like that. I could recite the bloody theme song to Blasto because I heard it playing out of a window on the way to an awards ceremony, doesn't mean I want to. And there's a difference between wanting to kill everyone in sight, and knowing how to in at least 4 ways."

"So, what? You're a super soldier. Simple as that."

"...That's actually a pretty good description." I admitted after thinking about it.

The door to the elevator opened and he took off out of it. "Well, I'm here to help. Now, lets go see a whore."

"Could you have not worded that in any other way?" I commented, using a biotic charge to catch up to him. "Also, if anyone asks, neither of us knew what we were doing because we were lightheaded from blood loss or giving blood."

"No can do."

"Dude, just because you're not looking for a girlfriend...let's just say hookers don't exactly help in the pursuit of such things."

He stopped for a second and put his hand on my shoulder. "Too bad Bourne, besides Shepard will probably hit her up before she leaves too."

"...I really wish I could say I don't think that'll happen and not be lying."

**S7: God, who the hell made Scorpion? He's slower than Trebor is with a good comeback.**

**T117: Better question is who's the idiot who fucked up his design for Injustice.**

**S7: There are more important things besides just aesthetics.**

**T117:...Yeah, I'm kinda shallow when it comes to aesthetics in video games. Why I never used certain armors in the ME series just cause I couldn't stand looking at them, regardless of stats.**

**S7: Like the security helm?**

**T117: Or the Deathmask, Kestrel Helmet, and Umbra Visor. **

**(Yeah, but that's not the bad part about him. He always puts Jack and Miranda in their DLC outfits. I mean...You're taking away the opportunity to put a catsuit on **_**that **_**figure? And Jack actually wears clothes with that outfit!)**

**S7: I'm not gonna complain about that. I do the same with Jack. Miranda on the other hand, I don't get why would you want to cover that up.**

**T117: Because the catsuits look idiotic to wear in the middle of the fight. Not to mention the heels. **

**(You hardly use her anyway! Why does it matter what she wears on the ship!)**

**T117: I usually switch it for the first recruitment mission where I'm stuck with her, then just don't bother changing it back later.**

**S7: She is one of the fun characters to take around with you. Always telling her off for her racist comments is fun.**

**T117: I'm actually using her on my current playthrough- I like her for dealing with protected enemies, and the squad bonus she gives. But I prefer to mix it up so I'm not using the same squad every playthrough.**

**S7: I straight up take it from a tactical angle and try to use the squads that would best fit each mission.**

**T117: Yeah, I do that too- sorta. I tend to have two characters that I always try to take one or the other, and then pick the second by whatever I'm doing. Also depends on class though. No sense having only up close or only long range people. And for ME2, multiple biotics aren't as good as ME3, since the only combo is with Warp. Tend to go kinda the same strategy as the first game with a combat person, tech person, and biotic person. Or failing that at least one attack for armor, one for shields, and one for barriers.**

**S7: I would say that the most universal team is actually Grunt, Garrus, and Sentinel Shepard.**

**T117: Sentinel is probably my favorite class.**

**)Then...why exactly am I some weird combo of adept and vanguard?(**

**T117: I dunno, ending up with biotics for powers just seemed more reasonable to me than suddenly knowing how to use an omni-tool, and since I didn't want to waste time with training instead of getting to the action…plus, biotic charge. How is that not badass?**

**)You mean the charge I didn't even figure out till the end of the story, and that was only for like 5 chapters where I didn't even use it in combat?(**

***What, do you want him to rereboot and make you a tech geek?***

**^Yeah, you don't wanna mess with stuff like that. trust me, I accidentally froze one of those people from Noveria trying to figure out how to use Engineer programs.^**

**)...There is that.(**

**~And you don't wanna be… what am I exactly?~**

**S7: Well, I have been thinking about that and I am going with Vanguard with gold biotics because fuck having blue, purple, red or green. Those are for losers.**

**T117: Yeah, fuck you too buddy.**

**S7: What? I included Danny in on that.**

**T117: Oh, no, I couldn't care less about him or my guys. But green? Javik is like the best character in the third game! Fuck you for saying that's not awesome.**

**S7: I never thought of his as green… I always thought that they were yellow. Well, that shows how fucked up my TV's color pallet was at the time.**

**^Here is a question. Can the drone go get me a beer? Because if I am getting shafted by not having biotics so that I can be more lazy I at least want a holobot slave to get it for me.^**

**S7: I'm going with yes.**

**(Might as well. Bourne's been charging pretty much anywhere that's more than five steps away.)**

**S7: But can he teleport?**

**T117: Well, since that didn't come around till the third game, and that's only the experts, I couldn't think of a way he could figure it out realistically. So I guess he'll be stuck with the charging.**

**^Haha, loser.^**

**)I'm sorry, which one us managed to land a girl during our story, and which one of us just got dumped? (**

**^A girl whose heart you will more than likely break. Dick.^**

**)...Even if I did, there's a chance to get back together with her later.(**

**T117: Yeah, about that...I have no idea at this point, I keep changing my mind.**

**(No, he's made up his mind and just doesn't want to say cause he's an ass. Proof of that is with his cliffhangers all the time.)**

**~He changes his mind like a girl changes clothes.~**

**^... Did you just quote Beyonce?^**

**)Think that'd actually be Katy Perry...unless they both have those lyrics.(**

**^Wait… Yep, you are right. although, it is kinda weird how you knew that.^**

**)I blame the perfect memory...and also Trebor has a weird kinda memory for that stuff.(**

**~Who's Catty Berry?~**

**^I love you so much right now.^**

***What's wrong with Katy Perry? She's got at least a few good songs.***

**~Oh, Katy Perry… Never heard of her.~**

**)Next you'll say you've never heard of Twilight, really make him swoon.(**

**~I have. Thirty Days of Night was a better representation of vampire lore.~**

**(Yeah, but don't get me started on 28 Days Later or that piece of crap Brat Pitt film that dared to name itself after one of the greatest zombie novels ever written!)**

**S7: Alright, well how about we all go and check out Paragon Lost?**

**T117: Meh. James wasn't my favorite character. **

**S7: Dude, You like Javik but you don't like James? did you ever play with them on the same squad? They are like the best team to have. Especially with a techy Shepard.**

**T117: Didn't say I didn't like him, he's just...meh. Not my favorite, not Jacob or Kaidan. **

**S7: Jacob, I can get. He's like just there to explain some stuff and then fall into the background with nothing memorable. But have you taken Kaidan with you and given him the Falcon? Even level one he rocks with that thing.**

**T117:...Yeah, Kaidan rarely made it to ME3 for me.**

**S7: Dude, he is like a bromigo. You need him at the end.**

**T117: I might consider it when I finally get around to actually caring enough to try beating the games on Insanity. And before you and all the readers go giving me crap about not beating it on that already, I like a challenge and some fun, not making difficult enough I want to shoot myself.**

**S7: I haven't even beaten it on that difficulty yet. It's all Tali's recruitment mission's fault. It's fucking impossible.**

**T117: I know what you mean- I did that just the other day and just on veteran it took me three or four tries...though I did tell Reegar to not help, so I guess some of that is my fault. Dominate is probably my new favorite bonus power though for everything else.**

**S7: Well, all I can say is… FLARE!**

**)Can you at least figure out a way to get me that one?(**

**T117:...Dominate basically takes down an enemy instantly, while giving you another ally. The only way for Flare to be really viable is to use an infiltrator and use the 'one power while cloaked' thing so the recharge time isn't insane. Otherwise it's good power every 20 seconds or so and then nothing the rest of the time except maybe grenades.**

**S7: Sure, and who is the better biotic player here out of the two of us?**

**T117: Multiplayer doesn't count…though as I've said many times, that is seriously ironic that you always use biotics while I prefer tech guys...except for infiltrator cause I can't hit the broadside of a barn without the time dilation thing.**

**S7: Yeah, I do kinda wish that I made Ty a biotic.**

**T117: I didn't say I didn't like biotics too- I just like the multiplayer biotic classes more. Singleplayer it's about the same across all six. How I level them up has a lot to do with it too.**

**S7: Yeah, mine are for rapid use.**

**T117: Same here. The one time I tried to build a soldier all about weapons instead of powers...She ended up with just the Revenant and Scorpion, spamming the Concussive Shot with different ammo types for the amplification evolution. **

**S7: Really? Boring!**

**T117: That's why I'm kinda partial to vanguards- at least with that spamming the same trick is entertaining to do since it's smashing stuff. **

**(Or Dominate. It's never not funny to see a guy turning to his friends and shooting them dead.)**

**S7: Gee, I bet the ladies just love how you use one move a ton.**

**(Your mother seemed to love it last ni- oww! Seriously Bourne, if you're going to stab me, can it at least be somewhere other than in the crotch?!)**

**T117: I prefer to map the buttons to quick fire for the most part, and only use the menu or whatever it's called if I need to. And Bourne, he's got a point, doing that just makes him whine. Next time just stab his hand or something so he can't type, and he has to ask us to type for him.**

**S7: I just yell it at my Kinect.**

**T117: Never bought one for the 360. Weren't any games that looked that great to me with it.**

**S7: Mine was a christmas present.**

**T117: I can never get voice command stuff to work for me anyway.**

**S7: Well, maybe it could hear you better if you took the dick out of your mouth.**

**T117: I'm going to let that slide cause of the your mom joke back in chapter 3. But FYI, it's not just me; my dad had to switch to the australian siri on his phone to get it to work.**

**S7: Crikey.**

**T117: Anyway, unless there's any other news or whatnot, I think that we ought to wrap this thing up.**

**S7: Nothing that I can think of.**

**(Then sayonara bitches...huh. I was expecting to get**

**)There we go. Took me a second to figure out which cord was his keyboard. Now it's yanked out.(**

**T117: See? Isn't that more satisfying than just stabbing him all the time?**

**S7: Well, lets go play some Mass Effect 3. 1473I2**


	17. Slumber Parties and Death Matches

**Ty:**

We both stepped into the Consort's chambers and everything was accented in purple. "Well, here we are."

"I still can't believe you still were able to trick her into letting us in while things are swayed to me."

The Consort stepped out from behind her bed and gave us both a bow. "It is good to meet you both. By this point, I can assume you have met with Doctor Michel?"

Bourne pointed to his bloody pant leg. "Yeah, that's a safe bet."

The Consort waved her hand over Bourne's pant leg and the blood evaporated as the tear repaired itself. He looked down and whistled softly. "Bet that saves you a lot of money on laundry bills."

She nodded to us both, "Now, Ty, things are not so different from last time when it comes to my power. I can grant you power to combat Iron. Bourne, I will unlock powers you have to fight Saren. The worst part about these two is that Saren knows Ty and Iron knows Bourne."

"So, you want to give us a secret weapon so they can't predict what we can do." Bourne muttered to himself.

I thought for a moment, "So, we are going to do like the power rangers did when they fought the psycho rangers?"

Bourne looked at me for a second, and decided not to comment. "Hold on a minute, you said powers for him to combat Iron, and for me to go up against Saren? I thought it was going to be just the opposite...and I was looking forward to it a bit." He said, eyes flaring as a smile of anticipation appeared on his face.

"Bourne, Iron knows everything you do. On top of that, he has every power in full force. Now, how do you combat someone stronger than you? You use a wildcard to throw him off."

He glanced at me. "Okay, he'd fit in that category, but from what I hear Saren's even stronger. I doubt I could beat Ty unless it was on my terms, and he's as powerful as when it's on his terms...also, really wish I hadn't admitted that out loud."

I raised my eyebrow but looked back at the Consort. "I don't think Bourne has ever seen Power Rangers in Space."

She nodded, "Indeed."

"Okay, based on what I vaguely remember from Dino Thunder or SPD, I'm guessing you're talking about some sort of 'super mode' or something? Or a power boost?"

I facepalmed for him, "Why do you talk about the bastard children to the series? To defeat the Psycho rangers, all the power rangers had to focus on one at a time. Single them out, and then finish them off."

"Somewhat dishonest tactics...I like the way you think lady." He frowned suddenly. "But why I do get the feeling it's not going to be that easy?"

"Because, even if we single them out, they are powerful enough on their own."

"Correct Ty", The Consort complemented, "Even apart, they will stand as forces to be reckoned with."  
"No kidding. We could barely handle one krogan, let alone a spectre." He smiled as a thought hit him. "Then again, just because I'm not one in this universe..."

"It means you can barely handle one krogan." The Consort said with a shake of her head.

"Yeah, I get it, this is going to be difficult at best. You said something about new powers earlier?"

The Consort nodded and held out her hands. "Here, take my hands."

I took her hand but Bourne hesitated a moment before doing so. "What powers are we talking about exactly?"

"I cannot say until I have done it. Your minds are like twisting mazes and to navigate them unknowable."

"That does not fill me with confidence." He muttered as he put his hand in hers.

Watching my wrists, I saw a green vein crawl up my arm and shoulder until it reached the back of my neck. Looking over, I saw the same had happened to Bourne, though in his case the energy was blue. Everything twisted and merged until just to see straight became a chore.

The sensation died slowly and the Consort let go of our arms. "There, it is done."

Bourne slapped the back of his neck. "Felt like you were injecting ice water directly into my spine."

I looked at my hand and flexed it, "That was a head trip."

"So, can you tell us what you just unlocked?" Bourne said, though it was pretty clear he expected the answer to be no.

She smiled, pleased with herself. "Bourne, you can now use the power Nova. Ty, you can catch thrown biotics and hurl them back at someone."

Bourne raised an eyebrow. "That'll come in handy against Iron." He looked at his hands as they started glowing blue. "You know, I half want to go start another bar fight just so I can try this thing out. A lot more satisfying than just punching them and then just kinda leaving it off like that."

Taking a few steps away, I stood across from Bourne and cemented my stance. "First, fire off a throw at me."

He smiled. "But you're not going to aim at me, and if it does hit me, I get to test Nova on _you_. Deal?"

He put his hand up and launched the throw. I put my arm out like I was holding a catchers mitt and it collided it with my hand. The throw forced me back to the wall but I managed to hold it in my hand. The throw turned from blue to green and the pressure was gone.

I looked at it in my hand and laughed, "Ha, look at that!"

"Don't get cocky. You can't-" he stopped and turned to look at the AI. "He can't do that with a shockwave or charge, can he?"

She put her hand out. "I said thrown attacks. Shockwave can but the pain would be tremendous. As for charge, he should avoid it anyway. Powers like Reave, Dark channel, and Slam are it's true bane. Those powers are not thrown and cannot be caught."

He turned to look at her, face emotionless. "I really hope you're not saying Iron can use all of those."

I threw Bourne's attack off to the side. "Well, Hero is in for a surprise later."

"Last I checked, it doesn't work on bullets. Or just being punched in the face."

Waving him off I said, "She uses singularity as an opening power. If I use that against her first, I could finish her off without a sweat."

"You're forgetting just two little details: She happens to be my best friend, and I have several attacks you can't block." He crossed his arms. "Not to mention, she's already pissed off, so maybe you should try making up with her before the two of you tear the bloody ship apart."

"Where's the fun in that? She needs to realize that she does not have as much control as you or me. She's not Shepard any more."

He looked at the AI. "If Iron's as powerful as you say, why didn't she also get a boost?"

"She is not an obstacle in your path. She is the chronicler on your journey. To sit and view what happens to you."

His hands clenched into fists. "In that case Ty, let me make one thing perfectly clear. If you ever threaten to rip her code apart again-"

"Do you ever go five minutes without making some sort of threat?" The AI said in exasperation.

"Only when I'm sleeping." He said with a chuckle. "But seriously, Singularity for breakfast."

I crossed my arms at Bourne, "Look, she is a big girl. If she thinks she can take me, then let her. I got knocked on my ass plenty of times to learn my place."

His eyes blazed. "You didn't see how she was after you walked out. You basically told her that all she ever did in her life amounted to squat. Whether or not that's correct, I don't know. Whether or not that what's you intended to do to her, I don't care. Point is...You have my memories. Think of how Raptor was about Akuze, and multiply that by twenty. That's what you did to her." He crossed his arms. "And I think we have enough to deal without the two of you being at each other's throat all the time. Especially because I'll be the one caught in the crossfire."

"Bourne, in my experience, when you start something with someone, the best possible action is to have a cage match. Fight it out, dance with the other person. Plead your case at the end of a closed fist."

He threw his arms up in exasperation. "Screw it, you two can deal with it. If it takes a goddamn cage match, then go right ahead."

"Good", I opened up my omni-tool and sent Hero the challenge. "Well, lets head to the Normandy and hit the simulator. Maybe, we can even talk Shepard into hitting up Pinnacle station. It's got a huge simulator."

He looked at me for a minute, and then smiled. "You know, something just occurred to me. You showed up too late for Therum in your version, so maybe that's why things were in your favor."

I rubbed my chin and nodded, "True, but I never went to Pinnacle Station."

His smile faded, and he swore. "So much for finally having things in my favor. " He shook his head. "Come on, lets go do this thing before I come to my senses."

"Didn't you do something similar with Garrus in your world?" The Consort pointed out.

"Yeah, but in my case we were smart enough to put biotics off limits and he didn't use his claws. It sounds like this'll be no holds barred." He looked at me pointedly. "And if neither of you use powers, she'd just destroy you."

I threw my hand out , "Well, good thing I mentioned it will be a no holds barred fight to Hero."

He shook his head. "Know what, I have a few issues of my own to work out. What's say we just make it a three person fight and deal with them all at once?"

"Hell no, you guys will just team up against me." It was like Bourne thought I was stupid.

He crossed his arms. "If that had been what I meant, I would have said it like that. I don't plan on playing favorites. And trust me, I think we'd both be more than happy to go against each other for more than a few things." He rubbed his forehead. "If I never hear Friday again, it'll be too soon."

"As fascinating as this conversation is, can I ask you to have it somewhere else?" The Consort broke in. "I do have other clients to help, and your appointment time is almost up."

I pointed out the door, "Okay, lets go see what kind of trouble we can get in."

**Shepard:**

Shepard sat across from Hannah. No matter how many times she tried to start a conversation, Hannah just brought it back to how she wanted to beat Ty's face in.

"So, what's going on in that brain? Getting over wanting to beat his face in?"

"Yes. Now I want to shove a singularity down his throat."

Shepard bit her lip, "Well, that's... an improvement."

She gave her an annoyed look. "You do realize that a singularity is literally a miniature black hole?" She sighed heavily. "What's more irritating than what he said is the fact that he might be right."

"What's wrong, did he say your stock is going to drop to zero?" Shepard joked.

"If you're not actually interested, then why are you even bothering to bring up the subject?"

"Okay, I am interested... just not at this point."

"And what the hell is that supposed to-" She cut off as her omni-tool started beeping, signifying a message. She barely even glanced at it before deleting it.

"Ty?" Cecelia guessed.

"If he wants to talk to me, he can do it in person, or not at all."

Cecelia thought back to the note he attached to the bottle of Ale. "I told him he wasn't allowed to apologize... ever. He didn't seem to listen to me at the time, but since then I never have seen him say sorry for any mistake he made."

"If he did, that'd probably the only thing to come out of his mouth." Hannah muttered darkly.

Cecelia considered her for a moment. "Is it just that time of the month for you?"

The look that got her was priceless. "No. Ty just has no value for life whatsoever, and he said as much to my face." She waved her hand. "You heard him. 'A fly in my soup.' He acts like his powers make him a god."

Shepard leaned on her knees, "The power to control any technical device, his own DNA, and whatever he touches. That sounds like a form of god. Yet, there is one thing you never realized."

"Enlighten me." She said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"He never called himself god. He says he is a User. Sure, his powers have given him a god complex but did you ever think that he is struggling to keep that mindset? Like he is afraid of what would happen if he gave it up?"

"I'm not in the mood for the shrink treatment, I already got that from Bourne."

Cecelia shrugged, "Maybe I am just hoping for the best after what he told me."

"What was that?"

"Philosophy stuff that doesn't matter now."

She grunted in reply.

"He basically said that he thinks women are the devil and love isn't real." Cecelia said as she looked away.

"Well, he got half of that right." Hannah said with a forced laugh.

Cecelia raised an eyebrow at her. "You agreeing with Ty on something?"

"Even a broken clock is right twice a day." She quoted in dismissal. "But if he thinks love is a lie...then I almost pity him."

She nodded with Hannah's statement, "Indeed, pity is one word to describe it. Wonder what made him that way?"

She considered it a moment before shrugging. "Basically, a super controlling ex who screwed him over a hundred different ways."

"That was oddly specific", Cecelia commented to her answer.

"Let's just say the three of us know a lot about each other by now."

Shepard leaned forward with her curiosity peaked. "What is her name?"

"Does it really matter?"

Shepard nodded and sat up straight, "It does right now."

She shrugged. "Layla."

"Must have had a father that liked Eric Clapton." Cecelia commented.

"How did the subject go from me wanting to severely murder Ty, to gossiping about his love life?"

She blushed and looked off to the side, "I don't know."

Hannah scrutinized her for a moment. "Don't tell me you have feelings for him or something?"

"What is this, a high school slumber party? When the hell is Ashley going to wake up?" She commented in quick succession.

Hannah's jaw dropped. "Oh my god, you do, don't you?"

"No, now drop it." Cecelia clenched her fist.

"Fine, fine." She answered, a small smile on her face.

She crossed her arms and sat back in her seat, "Why do you care anyway?"

Her face darkened. "Just making sure you're alright if I-" She stopped suddenly, and looked at the clinic doors as Bourne walked in.

"Well, since you didn't reply, I'm going to guess you just deleted the message Ty sent you."

"Bingo."

Ty stepped in and walked over to Hannah, "Fine, then here is it in person. You are angry at me and I sure as hell am pissed off at you. There is a simulator on the Normandy that we can duke it out in. No holds barred. You can use your biotics."

"And you can use your nanites." She said, crossing her arms. "Do you think I'm as stupid as you look?"

"Oh come on Hero, you totally stole that from me." Bourne said as he walked over.

Ty looked at Bourne, "I won't manipulate my armor or the world. I can stick to my regular abilities and Engineer programs."

Bourne nodded, though he smiled slightly. "And since Ty apparently doesn't trust me to not team up with you- even though I told him in no uncertain terms I wouldn't- I guess I'm refereeing to make sure you two don't kill each other."

She looked between them skeptically. "And what makes you think I'd agree to-"

"So you can prove to me that you aren't the fly." Ty answered flatly

Bourne shook his head. "Personally, I don't think its worth it. But if you two want to..." He trailed off as realization hit him. "How the hell am I being the voice of reason while she's being the reckless one?! That's like fire being cold and ice burning you when you touch it!"

Shepard was smiling bigger and bigger with every word until she said. "Yes, I haven't had a good throwdown in years. We can take bets on who will win. Majority of the crew will probably bet on Hannah since she is a biotic but this could be one fun time."

Bourne leaned over to whisper something in Hannah's ear. She grimaced in response. "Alright, I'll do it on one condition." Bourne's poker face turned to a look of surprise.

"What's that?", Ty asked annoyed.

"After one of us goes down-" She smiled. "We do another round, no powers, no weapons, just fists and feet."

Bourne shook his head. "This has got to be the dumbest idea I've ever heard...and the really annoying part is that I have no idea who to bet on, and don't have enough cash to risk betting if I did."

Hannah shot him an irritated look. "You know something I don't."

"Yeah, but since you didn't take my offered advice last time-" He looked between them, irritation very clear on his face. "I say you two can go to town on each other and let someone else deal with the consequences."

Ashley stumbled out of the medbay right after that with a smile on her face. "Well, let's go do this. Three-hundred credits on Hannah."

Bourne's face went totally expressionless, though he stayed silent. To Shepard, it seemed like he wanted Hannah to win, but expected Ty to.

"Well, lets go."

**Tali:**

Tali followed Wrex as he stomped through the crowd. They had just gotten a message while in Chora's Den about Ty and Hannah in a fight on the Normandy. Of course, Wrex being a Krogan took off immediately and headed for the Normady.

"Hurry up Shorty, we need to get there quick."

Tali pushed past a few humans and caught up to him. "Who are you calling shorty, heavy weight?"

Wrex let out a loud laugh, "Haha, you sure are fun when you have had a few Shorty."

It was true, Tali had drank a bit since Wrex was buying. It made her feel warm and brave inside her suit. "Well, I am the master engineer after all. I should be like this all the time."

"Will you shut up?" One of the Humans said as he turned around, only to gulp at the sight of Wrex.

A low growl was enough to send him running, and make the crowd part for them. "Is that why you needed Ty and Bourne to save you back on the Citadel?" Wrex answered as they moved forward. "Or were you just going easy on Fist's thugs?"

Tali slapped him on the shoulder. "Ha, Fist thugs would have been no match for me. Bourne and Ty just got there before I could handle the problem myself."

"Keep telling yourself that." He said with a low chuckle that sounded like distant thunder.

They stepped into the C-sec elevator and she hit the button to go up. "So, who is your money on?"

"Hm, Ty seems to have no grasp of his limits at all. Which can make him reckless and dangerous. But, I have never seen Hannah fight either. I reckon it won't be a battle of skill but of will."

Tali crossed her arms at him, "That was well thought out... for a Krogan."

"If there is one thing I know, it's a fight."

"Point taken."

The elevator stopped and all that was left was to get on the Normandy elevator. "You know, I kind of wish I had nanites like Ty. I could make elevators go faster."

Wrex gave her a strange look. "He can do that?"

He and Tali stepped into the next elevator, "Yep, he did it on Therum."

"Before or after he got a knife to the back?"

"Before." She said, taking a step away from the Krogan.

""Hm, be more impressive if he got it done with the knife in his back. Then again, humans don't have a redundant nervous system so it probably hurt like hell."

She nodded. "Bourne said he got stabbed with the same sort of knife, and he only survived because of his genetic enhancements. Ty's lucky he was able to do something with his nanites to keep himself alive."

"Doesn't sound like luck, sounds like he had the resources he needed to patch himself up."

She shrugged. "I don't know a lot about human biology. Especially his." She looked down at her gloved hands. "I don't even understand how they can do anything with two more fingers to get in the way."

Wrex looked at his hand too, "Yeah, you think they would have adapted the extra ones away."

"Maybe they used to use hand signals before they had vocal chords or something."

"Or they could have been extras in case they lost a few."

The elevator dinged and it opened up to the Normandy docking bay. "Well, guess we will never know."

It took only a few seconds to get into the Normandy but after they were in, Wrex took off to the simulator and left Tali standing by the door.

"Hey, uh, Tali, right?" She turned to see the pilot sitting in his chair, head turned around to look at her.

"Yes?"

"If you're going down to the fight, can you do me a favor and put 200 credits on the Biotic for me?"

"Uh...sure." She'd heard a rumor that he never left his seat due to an old injury, but didn't want to offend him asking if it was true.

"Thanks. Just let Shepard know, she can transfer the credits for me."

"Okay", Tali turned on her heels and made a beeline for the stairs.

It only took long when she was on the elevator and even then, time was sped up. She felt something come over her and knew it was from the idea of two powerhouses coming to blows. she hadn't been this excited since her father bought The Fleet and Flotilla bonus content edition.

When she walked into the combat sim, most of the crew was huddled around the edge. Hannah was at the far right side, clad in her purple armor and apparently limbering up. Ty was on the other end, he looked like he was just focusing and readying himself for what was to come.

Bourne was pacing in the middle of the ring, clad in his own armor and muttering to himself. Shepard was apparently taking bets at the front of the simulator. She walked over to her, and Shepard greeted her with a slight smile. "Decided to take some time off from running programs for Adams?"

Tali nodded, "Yeah, Joker wanted me to let you know that he's putting 300 credits on Hannah." She looked past her at Bourne. "What's Bourne doing in there though? Is he fighting too?"

"He's refereeing to make sure they don't go too far." She said, shooting him a disgusted look. "I said a broken leg might teach them a lesson, but he apparently doesn't want anything more than a few bruises for them." She shook her head. "Do you want to place any bets yourself? Because they're going to start in just a few minutes, so now's your last chance."

Tali looked down at them, "Yeah, put me in for four-hundred on Ty."

"Betting on the underdog huh?" She said as she marked it down. "Almost 2/3rds of the crew bet on Hannah just because she's the biotic."

Tali looked down at Ty, "Hannah can't change her armor or the objects around her."

"For this match, neither can Ty." Shepard answered. "He's sticking to his normal powers and engineer tech."

"Do you know his normal powers?"

She thought for a moment. "Back on Eden Prime, I saw him use Cyro Blast, Incinerate, and Overload. Not sure what else he can do, but from the way he and Bourne were acting, he has some sort of secret weapon lined up."

"Who did you bet on?" Tali asked.

She laughed. "I'm not going to risk my hard earned credits on a match like this. I just like seeing other people do it." She looked over at Bourne. "I think half the reason he wanted to ref was so that he'd have to be impartial and unable to bet."

Tali nodded, "Well, this is going to be one interesting match."

**(I'll put my money against Bourne.)**

**)...I'm not even fighting.(**

**(Oh, I didn't mean money on you losing, I meant money on you getting hurt somehow. Maybe mortality.)**

**^Might as well put all of it on me. I can't wait to kick her ass.^**

**~Um, your a dick.~**

**^What are you talking about?^**

**~'Sup bitch?' Seriously, do you respect women at all?~**

**^I do. I just don't support her.^**

***Fuck off.***

**(Yikes. Thought she was supposed to be paragon.)**

**)And you're supposed to be dead under a mountain. But apparently, what we think people are and how they should be stopped applying for the sake of story...and because I didn't submit that request "in triplicate."(**

**S7: Okay, so I think it's about time we break it to people that… shit's going to get unreal to the point it's kinda ridiculous from here on out. Trebor's good readers and mine (The four of you) we are about to enter the craziest, most insane, funnest thing you have ever read.**

**T117:...Yeah, that's pretty much the most accurate possible way to describe it. **

**(I still have no idea how you managed to not be on drugs while writing it.)**

**T117: Neither do I...maybe my roommates put something else in that Tylenol bottle and didn't tell me.**

**S7: Yeah, I just wanna take this chance to tell people that this is not going to be average for either of our stories. It's something that you get when you take a twisted mind like Trebor with an over-the-top guy like me.**

**(Twisted mind? I think you're being too generous.) **

**)Agreed.( *What he said.***

**^I think the point was that things are going to be awesome but not as grounded as Stuck in a World of Fiction. Definitely less than Users.^**

**~But damn, was it fun to be in.~**

**T117: I dunno, I think I kept _some_...yeah, who the hell am I kidding.**

**S7: This in on like a level right under Gurren Lagann or Attack on Titan for you younger folks.**

**(...What?)**

**^Yeah, he has been on an anime high thanks to Dead or Alive 5. Both of those are about as over the top as they get. GL is about giant robots that run on fighting spirit and can combine in the most ridiculous way other is about a guy who can turn into a giant.^**

**(...The only animes T117's ever watched are Pokemon when he was like five, and Yu-Gi-Oh. So you seriously lost us.)**

***It's over the top, just go with that.***

**)Also, shouldn't rewatching Yu-Gi-Oh in japanese with subtitles count as a different show from the dub?(**

**(...Not really. They're like the same thing.)**

**)...Dude. 4kids sucks. They're not _remotely _the same thing.(**

**(What? Next you're going to tell me Zexal isn't the best show of the series.)**

**)...(**

**(What? You think the _original _was the best or something?)**

**)That's not even...that's like saying… ***Kr0g nk11er24 has signed off out of protest.

**(That was easy. But seriously, fuck both those things.)**

***Agreed.***

**T117: I'm still docking your pay for writing that even as a joke.**

**(...Fair enough.)**

**S7: Yeah, like I said. Nowhere to go but over the top.**

**T117: Also, since as far as I know there have been exactly zero submissions for the art contest...do we want to extend it to like chapter 20 or something, or just cancel it or what?**

**S7: Well, Twinzip wanted to get in on it. I think Ferret said something about an epic stick figure drawing he was working on. So, yeah, lets.**

**T117: Alright, till chapter 20 it is.**

**S7: Yeah, Twin said he was doing them in like an anime high school thing. I am kinda hoping that he has Bourne shoving Iron in a locker.**

**(...) **CrazeyMetal has signed off out of fear.

**~I think it would be hilarious if Hero was like blowing up the science lab.~**

***...I'm an adept, not an tech class. Why would I be in there?***

**^Because, out of all of us. You are the most likely to be the clumsey goody-two-shoes.^**

**T117: I can't really see her as clumsy though. She might be like getting annoyed at someone while she's trying to study in the library or something though.**

***...I can't decide whether or not that's an improvement.***

**^Okay, I need to be the one wearing the shades like Squirtle wears in Pokemon, driving a giant robot.^**

***...Is the goal to get every single person from SiaWoF to sign off for various reasons?***

**S7: I don't see what's wrong with Bourne shoving Iron in a locker.**

***No, I'm totally fine with that. But while he's doing that, and I'm blowing up or being a goody two shoes...you think you deserve to be driving the giant robot?***

**T117: Fine. You can be holding hands with Thane or making heart eyes at him or something.**

**~What can I do?~**

**S7: Oh, Riding a hoverboard through a portal as a demon arm reaches out to grab you!**

**^Yes!^**

***...See, this is kinda like the rest of the story. Bourne and I trying to be somewhat down to earth while everyone else is-...***

**T117: While everyone else is like you after you make out with Thane and get all hallucinogenic?**

***...* **N7pro has signed off because she can not think of a comeback to that.

**S7: Maybe Bourne can be kicking a locker that has Iron peaking out of it into a black hole that Hero created.**

**T117: I'll talk to them about when they get back here.**

**^Dude, they are characters you created. Can't you just imagine them back?^**

**(He tries not to think of me more than he has to. I make him question his sanity.)**

**S7: Why? You aren't really even insane. You aren't doing the same thing over and over respecting different results.**

**(...Technically, since I kept going up against Bourne and expecting to win…yeah, that and I keep beating this dead fly with a paperclip and battery and expecting it to turn into a zombie fly, I think your argument is invalid.)**

**^I just don't see how you are insane when Shepard can't be insane to save the Galaxy.^**

**(I'm good at faking not being insane...though that's never really shown in the story, so you kinda just have to take Bourne's/Trebor's word for it...Speaking of which, what's the best thing about kittens? They can't run away if you- **Crazeymetal has been logged out by host.

**T117: Anything else we need to take care of before we sign off?**

**S7: Um… put your favorite flavor of ice cream in your the review because it's ice cream and it's better to talk about it then religion with the internet.**

**T117: Sayonara**

**S7:1473I2**


	18. Respect for the Hero

**Bourne:**

I glanced over at where Shepard was taking bets and grimaced. I got the feeling there would be a lot of unhappy people after this match. _So I guess it's actually a good thing I'm not the XO, because I don't really want to deal with that._

Shepard's voice was suddenly in my ear. "Looks like most of the crew is here. And they put a lot of money on this thing."

"We waiting for a few more minutes, or are the stragglers out of luck?"

"Only stragglers are those that aren't coming."

I nodded. "Then I guess it's time to start this thing." I brought up my omni-tool, and tapped into the simulation's speakers.

"Ladies and Gentlemen-" I said, my voice magnified so everyone could hear "-as well as those of you who fit into neither category," I saw a few people looking at Wrex at that statement. "Before we begin, I'm going to lay down the ground rules so everyone is perfectly clear on how this thing's going to work."

"Just get on with it!" I heard someone yell, but luckily for their skull I couldn't see where they were, which meant my knives would have to stay on my arms.

"Believe it or not, I generally consider these idiots my friends, so I don't want to see one of them get killed. Does anyone have a problem with that they'd like to discuss?" I said, searching the crowd and daring the person to speak up again. When there was no reply, I continued. " The rules are simple. No weapons, only tech or biotic abilities. The fight will continue until one or both of the combatants are unable to continue." I smiled. "And if one of them hits the Ref, they will be immediately disqualified via a biotic charge."

I saw Hero roll her eyes as I said that bit.

"So, without further ado-" I smiled. _If they want to be so dramatic about it, then that's how they're going to have it. _"In this corner, fighting in the purple armor...she's the adept with the attitude, the biotic bruiser, the hard hitting Hero...Hannah Swan!"

She responded by chucking a warp orb past my head.

I chuckled. "And in the other corner, fighting in the red and black armor...he's the engineer with the ego, the nerd with the nanites, the underdog User...Ty Flynn!"

Ty liked the attention and fired off a cryoblast into the air that exploded like a white firework..

I smiled. "This would normally be the time the competitors met in the middle and shook hands, but that's not as exciting as just seeing them beat the crap out of each other." I charged out of the center and to the edge. "So let's skip to the part where I say "Fight!"

Unsurprisingly, Hero was the one who started things off, tossing out a shockwave that cascaded towards Ty. _That part is surprising though. She normally leads off with Singularity. _I smiled slightly. _Guess she figured changing tactics was a good idea, since she knows Ty has something up his sleeve._

Ty reacted by dodging to the left and keeping on his feet. He was obviously waiting for her to throw out something he could send back.

I saw her eyes narrow slightly, and she did the same thing as before, apparently trying to force his hand.

Changing it up, he rolled to the right but at a forward angle so he was closer to Hero. She sprinted at him, trying to close the distance, and launching a warp field at him. _That'll cost her._

Ty rolled out of the way and pulled up two omni-tools. He pressed them together when Hero was close and it fired a spray of ice.

She rolled to the side, but slid due to the frozen ground, and ended up on her back. She launched a pair of throw orbs at him as she started to get back up.

Ty put his arms up and took both shots. One knocked him on his ass and the other sent him sliding across the ring.

I had to admire his strategy, while at the same time shaking my head at it. _If he can surprise her with his new ability when she least expects it, he'll get the edge. But if he's not careful, she'll take him down before he can use it._

She was quick to press the advantage, throwing a singularity that formed directly above him. It picked up Ty and he got caught in the field. Looking like she finally had him, Hero tossed a throw to set off the explosion.

Ty saw it coming and stuck his arm out to catch it. He began to move around the singularity and lose his angle when it was getting danger close. Ty countered it with a ballsy move as he reached in and took hold of the Singularity. It changed from blue to green to red before it finally settled back on green. The singularity was now his but not for long. He was then knocked from its orbit by Hero's throw.

She threw a shockwave at him as he landed, though I guessed she was using it more out of luck than anything. _Or she's saving her more powerful abilities for later._

Ty got to his feet quick but didn't have enough time to get out of the way. He put his hands up and caught the shockwave. It pushed him back to the edge of the ring and he struggled to hold it.

"Aaaaaaahhhhhh", Ty screamed as he took in the shockwave into one hand. It turned

from purple to green and he knew he had it. He held it in his hand and activated his omni-tool in his left.

Hero was suddenly surrounded by a purple aura, apparently being cautious as she reassessed what he could do.

Ty began walking forward and started hitting all his powers. The overload canceled out her barrier, but with the longer time for the others to hit, she put up a domed shield that blocked them. Ty followed them up with flamethrower and just walked forward as it burned away at her shield.

Her brow furrowed as she thought, and she suddenly rolled to the side as the shield dropped, throwing a lift orb at point blank range.

Ty let the shockwave go at her while he was in the air and she didn't have enough time to react. It hit her at a vertical angle and she slammed into the floor. She was only there for a second before she was back on her feet, and I had to hold back a cheer as she finally used Reave. Unable to catch it, it detonated the lift field and the resulting explosion sent him flying.

_If she just sticks with that, she could actually win this thing._

Ty began to level in the air as he fell to the ground, he took the chance to fire off an incinerate and another power. Hero put up a shield, expecting the fireball to be caught on it. She immediately cursed herself as the submission net blew by her shield and caught her.

She struggled for a moment, before warping part of it off and managing to break free. But it left her wide open for the incinerate to light what was left of the net. She instantly exploded in a fiery blaze and looked on the verge of panic as her shields barely kept it the fire off of her. She rolled to the side, attempting to extinguish the blaze, but managed to fire off a Reave at her opponent.

Unfortunately, the fire obscured her vision and she missed by several feet. Ty activated his drone and then took off at Hero with omni-knuckles activated.

She shrugged the net off right as the drone shocked her, dropping her shields. She threw a warp at it that instantly destroyed it, but then Ty was right on top of her. He brought a hard punch to her chin that lifted her up and launched her into the side of the ring.

She struggled to her knees, managing to launch a wide pull in his direction. Ty seemed to know that he'd gotten the advantage. He grabbed the pull and threw it back at her.. She put up a barrier, rendering its effects useless, and got back to her feet. _Good thing she's got the lazarus tech or there's no way she'd be able to keep this up._

She yelled as she launched a reave at him, and this time she was right on the mark. Ty ignored the pain long enough to slap his fists together and fire another snapfreeze at her.

She rolled to the side, and threw her arm in the air, sending a shockwave cascading towards him. He tried catching it, but as it made contact with the Reave field still surrounding him, it detonated it, sending him flying up and into the air.

I had to admit, I was impressed. Even with Ty holding back, he was still holding his own. Granted, he could throw a lot of her attacks back at her, but it looked like her experience fighting other biotics meant that she could counter most of his counter attacks.

_And the fact that she can heal from anything he throws at her pretty quickly doesn't hurt either. _Still, I had a feeling my gut that what the AI had said was true- though I'd be far from disappointed if she proved me wrong.

Ty landed and Hero fired a shockwave to finish him off. He looked tired but brought up his hands and caught it. It was pushing him back, so she tried to press the advantage and launched a pair of throw orbs at him.

Looking at Ty, I saw blood explode from his nose but holding his ground. The User stood up and took in the shockwave. It turned green as he held it in his hand. One of the throws almost hit him but he caught it too. But there was still the other one, and it slammed him into the wall.

Ty looked almost beat, but was still going. He put his hands together doing something wierd with the biotics. _If he blows himself up doing that, I think I'd be perfectly happy with that result. _

They formed into one orb and Ty looked up smiling through all the blood on his face. Winding up he threw the orb at accelerated far faster than a normal biotic attack, giving her no time to dodge it. As it hit her, it transformed into a shockwave that lifted her up into the air until it dissipated and she fell to the ground.

She got back to her feet, but I could tell it had done a number on her. _They might just end up in a draw. He's too stubborn to give up, and she can recover from something like that quickly...plus, she's just as stubborn, if not more so._

She launched a shockwave as she ran at him, focusing her power around a fist. Ty dodged to the side and put his hands together firing a snap freeze at her. It hit her and she began to slow as the Ice formed around her joints, making it harder to move. It didn't stop her though, and she launched a Reave right at his chest.

Ty took it but hit his omni-tool and used energy drain. The ice on Hero exploded and she fell to her knees in front of him. He held up his omni-tool up to her face and had a stone cold look on his face.

"Submit. Because I will not lose." The look in Ty's eyes was one of drive. At one glance, you knew he wouldn't back down until he won or was dead. I had to admire that.

Hero looked up at him and for a moment, I half thought she would give up. Instead, she retaliated by grabbing Ty's elbow and pushing his arm into the air so he couldn't blast her. Ty was caught off guard, making it easy for her to fully grab his arm to toss him away.

He slid several feet and left himself open for her to hit him with a throw to knock him to the other side of the ring. Ty managed to use his slide and got to his feet and catch a warp that Hero threw at him. He smiled for a moment, thinking he had just thwarted her attack but was shown wrong as she hit him with a reave.

Hero began to follow it up with a shockwave but was hit with the warp in mid motion. The hit threw her off so the shockwave was cancelled. I looked over at Ty and saw him make a pitching motion as another spurt of blood shot out of his nose.

A biotic Flare left his hand and hit Hero causing an explosion followed by a biotic explosion. I winced, figuring there was no way she'd be getting up from that.

Judging from the satisfied look on Ty's face, he figured the same thing. As the dust cleared though, I saw that Hero had gotten back to her feet, and her hand was pointed at Ty's head, biotics flaring around it. She hit him right in the chest and pulled her hand back, causing him to fly towards her.

He suddenly hit the ground as the purple glow around her faded, and it clearly knocked the wind out of him. She looked at him for a moment, took a step towards him, and suddenly just collapsed.

For a moment, I thought Ty might have hit her with Overload, or maybe Neural Shock, but then I realized she'd passed out from sheer exhaustion, the Pull being her way to throw Ty the bird and end things on her terms.

I saw Ty was struggling to his feet, so I charged over to where she'd collapsed, and brought up my omni-tool for a quick scan. _Probably should have Chakwas double check, but doesn't look like there's any lasting damage. _

Ty tried to push me away, though he only earned himself an annoyed look. I moved over anyway and he kneeled down next to her. He put an arm under her back and one under her legs before struggling to his feet and limping toward the exit. He looked like shit and could collapse at any moment.

I stopped him by putting a hand on his shoulder. "How about I take care of her, while you go and enjoy the cheers of your adoring public? Or go take a nap so you stop looking like death incarnate."

Ty shrugged me off and kept walking. "No, I got her."

"Will you stop being an idiot and just give her to me before you both end up on the ground? Know your limits dude."

I noticed Ty stood a little taller. "No, I can do it. I have to do it."

I used my biotics to catch up to him. "Buddy, you just got the crap beat out of you. Also, it looks like the Lazarus stuff is already starting to work, so on off the chance she wakes up in someone's arms, probably better it's me instead of you that's carrying her. Less likely to punch on reflex."

"Jason, I have to do this. If not to get her medical attention then out of respect."

I sighed. "Fine. But I'm coming with you so if you do collapse, someone's at least there to catch the two of you. And you've got no more chance of changing my mind than I do of changing yours."

"I won't be", I suddenly noticed that Ty had a transparent layer of code over him that I hadn't seen at a distance.

"What exactly is that?" I asked, gesturing to it. I noticed a moment later that his nose had stopped bleeding, and guessed it was doing something to heal him.

"Something I programmed after the knife in the back on Therum. There is a lot you can do in a coma."

"You know, for most people, the whole point of a coma is that they aren't doing much besides breathing."

Ty shifted how he was holding Hero so it was a little more secure. "That can be what the others that have been sucked into Mass Effect do, but I am productive even when I am lying on a bed."

I chose to ignore that comment. "Does it only work on you, or would it work on anyone?" I asked, guessing the former since he hadn't mentioned it after I'd been stabbed.

"It can work on others, I would just have to maintain direct contact with them for a really long time."

"Makes sense." I said with a shrug as we walked through the hallways. "By the way, do you actually know where you're going? Because I'm pretty sure the elevator that leads to the medbay is back thataway...or are you just getting away from prying eyes to use a glitch portal?"

"I spotted a glitch when I was fighting Garrus and Wrex. I was going to use it and come up right by the lockers next to the medbay."

"So, I guess only we can notice them?"

He looked at me, "Only I can notice them. You don't see them obviously."

"I saw the one you came out of back on the Citadel above the elevator. How did you think I had enough warning to catch you?"

He shook his head, "Because they light up when in use. Obviously you don't see them, because we have passed five so far."

I looked behind me in surprise, wondering if he was pulling my leg. Then I looked back at him, and realized he was dead serious. "Last I checked, you're the User here, not me. Super soldier, remember?"

"God, you aren't going to call yourself that all the time, right?" He said, clearly annoyed.

"I'm sorry, how often have you called yourself a User? Because by my count, it's over 2 dozen in less than a week. And you were in a coma for part of that week."

"How many times do I have to reiterate it to people to remind them that I'm not a regular person. You guys seem to forget that a lot."

"Is that why you apparently need me to deal with Saren for you, while you deal with the psychopath you let out?" I said it in a half joking tone.

He laughed as he stopped by the wall. "We should totally call Iron, Psycho Red when we see him."

"Bronze tends to piss him off too." I thought for a second. "Kinda a shame that this Saren didn't get his face all shot up like mine did, or we could call him "Scars" or something...and yes, I recognize the irony in that statement since my own face looks like I fought a lawnmower and lost."

"Whatever you say Scars." With that he put his hand on the wall to get sucked in. Leaving me alone, and staring at where he'd been. I pressed my hand to where he'd disappeared, though I didn't really expect much to happen.

"Why was I dumb enough to give him the idea for a nickname?" I asked myself aloud. _Now I'll have to think of something for him. And Neo just isn't creative enough._

I looked back the way I came, and sighed. _Least the crowd should be gone by now...except when has my luck been that good lately?_

I started heading that direction, and stopped as I faintly heard people talking with what was clearly irritation in their voices- a lot of people. I looked around for an engineering tunnel I could use to get to the upper levels, and smiled as I saw one. _Not quite as flashy as Ty's method- but I'll take it. _

**Ty:**

Hero began to stir on the bed after sleeping for three hours. "Looks like you are finally awake."

She opened her eyes, then groaned and closed them again. "Please tell me I actually won and then I just had a nightmare where you beat me." It was pretty clear from her voice that it wasn't a serious suggestion.

I smiled and leaned on my left knee. "Not a dream, but you did give me a run for my money."

She slowly sat up, wincing slightly. "What about the part where you had green biotics? Was that a dream too, or is there something I don't know about you?"  
I shrugged, "I was stealing your powers and throwing them back at you."

She gave me a blank look. "Since when can you do that?" It turned to one of irritation. "And where's Bourne, so I can kick his ass for not letting me in on that?"

"Since we went and saw the Consort and if I had to guess, I'd say that Bourne is out trying to work up the courage to say something to Ashley."

She looked at me as if wondering if she'd heard me correctly. "Consort?"

"Yeah, she unlocked that for me and Nova for Bourne. To help us handle Iron and Saren."

"...I think now would be a good time for someone to fill me in." She smiled broadly. "Though next time I see Bourne, I have something to hold over his head and use him to get what I want."

At almost that exact moment, Bourne walked in. "Ty, if I were you, I'd avoid Wrex and Garrus for the next couple days. They both bet on Hero, and are pissed that they lost." He suddenly seemed to notice she was awake. "So, did beating the shit out of each other get you to get along?"

She smiled. "Yes. I have just one question though."  
"...Okay?"

"How did you enjoy the Consort's company?"

He looked at me in irritation, crossing his arms. "His idea, not mine."

"Yet, we both benefited from it. So, what's wrong with going to see a whore if it makes you feel good?"

"...please tell me you didn't actually-"

"OF COURSE NOT!" He exploded, face reddening slightly. "She's one of...Argh, Ty, you explain it. I can never think about it without getting a headache."

"She's one of the AIs in this world. She unlocks the power within." I said making her more confused and trying to force Bourne to explain it.

"Long story short, Dr Michel was another and told us to go and see her." He allowed disgust to cover his face. "And somehow, a certain red-eyed maniac managed to avoid having a mountain collapse on him, and is now working with a certain Turian Spectre, who apparently is like Ty is at full strength, but all the time."

I suddenly felt that familiar presence at the back of my skull. _)Look, I get that you want her to accept that there are AIs and all that, but what she doesn't know won't hurt her. It might be better to just say they're in charge of running this place and leave it at that.(_

Judging from the way Hero was looking at us, she hadn't 'heard' what he'd just said. "How does she know about Iron? And how exactly did she 'unlock the power within?'"

He looked at me pointedly. _)Look, I had a lot of time to think in those tunnels, since nobody was around to interupt me. You're the one who knows more about all this than I do. So if you honestly think it's better for her to know everything, then tell her. Just be prepared for the consequences if you do so.(_

"She used the Asari mind link thing to enter our heads and unlock powers that we kept ourselves from using." I gave into what Bourne wanted and I slightly hated myself for it.

He sighed. "It wasn't quite that. Basically...she took over our sort of role of keeping things in line and making sure things don't go astray." He gestured to me and cut her off as she opened her mouth. "Seeing as Iron qualifies, she gave him the ability to catch and redirect some biotic attacks, and unlocked Nova for me."

She looked down at the floor, thinking.

"You okay?", I asked.

She looked at Bourne with a guarded expression. "There's something more than that, isn't there?"

"Why would you think that?" He asked, seeming perfectly genuine.

She glared at him. "Because, even though you did manage to keep me from hearing what you said to Ty, I still could tell you were saying something." She turned to glare at me. "And since he lied about the mind linking, I'm betting that you told him to keep it from me." She returned the glare to him. "I spent a long time in your head Jason, and I know how you think. Especially when it comes to keeping secrets."  
He sighed. "Alright, fine, it was my idea to go and see the damn consort because she was the story controlling AI when Ty did things. Happy?"

I sat back and got ready to enjoy the fireworks as Hero stood up from the bed. She marched over to Bourne, and stood glaring for a moment.

He met her gaze cooly.

Her hand went up to slap him, and he caught it by the wrist, looking at her in silence.

"You'd never suggest that." She said, yanking her hand away. "So I want the actual truth."

_)Your call. She knows that something's up, but not what it is. What are the odds she'd find out later?(_

_ ^I would think very slim, considering all the Consort said was that she isn't the Shepard in this universe. She is like Garrus or Wrex.^_

_ )I'd say she's a hell of alot more than that.( _His hand snapped up to intercept her wrist again, and he shoved her back with his other hand. _) She said she's...an observer. And she already knows that all this was a videogame where we came from. But...she knows about your experiences, and knows that you can use code. She doesn't know how much that permeates here though.(_

He was suddenly wrapped in a glowing purple stasis field. _)And for the record, I can warp out of here anytime I want, but the way she's looking at us, and seeing how she kicked your ass, I think it might be safer in here.(_

"She let us know that you won't be able to kill Saren. He can only be killed by Shepard and in this universe... You are Hannah Swan." I spat out to keep her from hitting me.

She wheeled on me. "Then how come Bourne was able to kill-" She cut off as Bourne broke out of the stasis field.

"Different universe, different rules." He put his hand on his chin thoughtfully. "And now that I really think about it, it wasn't me that killed him. It was Iron...Iron Shepard"

"Then why the hell didn't you just say that to begin with?!"

"Because when Ty so much as mentioned the possibility that this could be different from our universe...do I really need to go into detail from there?" He asked rhetorically

"It wasn't that things were different, that I already guessed. It's that he was so casual about manipulating others."

"Hannah-" he said, putting emphasis on the name- "That's what being here can take, we both know that." He looked at the closed door pointedly. "Any of them find out the truth, same result as if Raptor did, or what happened when Ty told his Shepard. And in those versions, you and Iron weren't running around in actual bodies, literally looking yourself in the face."

He looked over at me. "Come on, back me up here."

"Yeah, could you imagine if Cecelia was in your shoes and lets say she absolutely hated Thane. But you told her you liked him. How weird would that be for her?"

"And you might actually be more like her than option number completely batshit fucking insane and focused on killing everything he sees. She finds about about Bronze, everything goes straight to hell."

"Raptor seemed to accept me and Iron." She said, crossing her arms.

"I told her that you were based on her pysch profile but seriously altered. I didn't tell her that you were literally her if she'd been born somewhere else under different circumstances."

I laughed at how convoluted this had become. "Okay, can we just chill now and go get some food? I am starving and I think I need a shower."

She smiled, and while it wasn't as creepy as Cecelia could do, it was almost as scary. "You seem to have forgotten that one condition for me doing your little challenge. Hand to hand, no armor, weapons, or powers."

"If I were you Ty, I'd just forfeit. Then again, she put me in stasis, so I could also just charge her and disqualify-" he was suddenly in that same position, and broke out with a warp looking irritated. "Do you never tire of doing that?"

I shrugged, "I have the combined knowledge of Ezio, Sam Fisher, Anderson Silva, and Guile. So, if you are still up for it. I think it would be easier for me to win than the last one."

"Have you ever gotten training from a drell assassin?" She asked dryly. "Because personally, I'd say-" She suddenly flew into the wall as Bourne hit her with a charge.

"That's it, I'm ending this while you two can still walk, because Ty's not the only one hungry right now, and I'm not in the mood to ref something else." With that, he turned and walked out the door.

She got up to his feet and glared at the closed door. _*If you'd like to take his place, do that again.*_

_)Lady, I'm not a genius, but I'm sure as hell not an idiot either. Not in terms of fighting.( _He shot back, then cut us both off.

She looked at me. "I say we get food first and then we can worry about it." Bourne was waiting for us outside the door.

We all walked out to the table and got our food. "Okay, I have to ask this cause it is eating away at me. What kind of training did you get from Thane? Cause last I checked, you guys only had enough time for a quick fling before taking on the Collectors."

She shrugged. "Not sure how to describe it, but it was several weeks, between dealing with that rogue AI project, the info broker, and then that renegade asteroid that threatened to wipe out the batarian colony."

_)DLC, in case you missed it.(_

_ ^I got that.^ _I took a bite of the roast beef sandwich. "Okay, so what you are saying is, you learned how to fight like a drell but still couldn't defeat Leng until after Thessia?"

She looked at me in shock, that quickly turned to anger.

"I think that's a sore subject." Bourne said under his breath, never taking his eyes off of her.

"As I recall, you didn't beat a certain turian until after he'd killed your girlfriend either." She shot back.

I pointed at her, "Technically, I never called her my girlfriend. Plus, she was literally holding me back."

"Doesn't change-"

Bourne slammed his fists on the table as he broke in. "Hey, for fuck's sake, enough already! We have at least two all powerful lunatics probably scheming to kill us right now! Like we don't have enough problems. Oh, he wiped someone's memory. Oh, she punched me in the face! Well get over it! We can't just sit down at a table and have dinner and just have a normal conversation or some shit for two hours like three normal-ass people!?: He leaned back in his chair with a sigh. "Jesus Christ."

I smiled and took another bite. "So, Jason, how was school today?"

"Very funny smartass." They both said at the same time.

"Seriously though, I thought I saw you almost lose your shit during our fight."

Bourne took a bite and thought for a moment. "I doubt you'd handle being set on fire much better than she did."

Hero took a bite of sandwich, nodding in agreement. "And that wasn't so much 'losing my shit' as it was trying to get back to kicking your ass."

Setting my sandwich down, I grabbed the pudding and took a bite. "Yeah, can't imagine you'd like being reaved. Felt like I had athletes foot over my entire body. EVERYWHERE."

"If you two start comparing scars or battle wounds or something, I will put you both in stasis and just walk away." Bourne commented. "Though if you do, I think my face speaks for itself in that department."

"Yep, looks like you don't know how to work a lawnmower." I put my hand up to Hero hoping I would get a high five for the burn.

_*FYI, I was still sharing a brain with him when Iron raked Saren's claws across his face, and it seriously did hurt like hell.*_

_ )Also, you've made the lawnmower joke a million times. Pick a new tool already.(_

_ ^You have made them more than I have.^_

_ *Doesn't change his point._* She said, and then smiled. "You know Bourne, it looks more like you slipped when shaving because you were using one of your knives."

"Lady, I've got actual knife wounds. They look nothing like these things. And when, WHEN, have _I_ ever, EVER slipped when using a knife? EVER?"

"You launched a few into a wall trying to get that system on your arm to work." She pointed out.

"There's a difference between not knowing how to use experimental tech, and knowing how to use one of the oldest tools created by man" He paused. "Speaking of experimental tech, when you get a minute Ty, can you switch my omni-saw for a normal blade? It's cool and all, but I feel like with such a wide radius, I'm going to accidently slice something in half. And maybe if it's less complicated, it'll actually last when the balance shifts."

"And how does that not count as a knife?" Hero pointed out.

I socked him in the arm and changed it into a regular omni-blade. "There, took away all the things that made it cool."

"I'd rather be uncool and alive than cool and dead." He said, shaking his head. "But if you insist, why not turn it into the engineer's fire blade or infiltrator electric."

"After you gave Garrus and Wrex theirs," Hero broke in, "I heard him thinking "don't go fanboy asking for the flame blade.'"

He glared at her, but didn't deny it. "Fine", I socked him in the arm again, "it's done. But no more changing it. Or else it's going to cost you five thousand more credits every time. Hero, you still have a freebee if you want one. No omni-tazer though, that's mine."

She opened her mouth to speak, then stopped and considered it.

_) I've got to ask, what the hell would you need 5000 credits for? You're already richer than was possible in the game.(_

_^I just don't want to be changing it every mission and I got the idea from the power reset on the Normandy in Mass Effect 3.^_

"Can you do an Omni-bow?" Hero asked.

I nodded, "Yep, but do you really want it without the arrow mods?"

"I'm more trying to think of what I'd actually use. If someone gets in close, I can always use my biotics."

"You can just as easily reave someone as shoot them with an arrow." Bourne pointed out. "Probably easier."

"Yeah, but there is no way she could reave several targets at a distance and not get tired."

"Wide pull, detonate it. Or singularity and detonate it." Bourne said absently, still thinking.

"Still uses stamina."

"Mine isn't as high as Bourne's, but my cybernetics still put me above the typical biotic." She gestured to me. "I was able to go full force with you for...what, around 7 minutes?"

"Batarian Gauntlet? No, that'd be the same as just hitting them. Maybe that thing that the juggernaut can do? No, no real point to that." Bourne said aloud.

"The batarian gauntlet makes their heads explode. I'm pretty sure your punch doesn't do that. And Hero has barriers, not shields so it would have no effect."

"I don't need to explode heads, I need to take them down, and knocking them off a cliff or into a wall tends to that very well, thank you." She said.

I gestured to her, "Yes, but all your wide palm thing does is push them back."

"What about the Paladin's shield? No, wait, she can do that domed energy thing, or a normal barrier." He crossed his arms, creases in his forehead appearing as he thought harder.

"Poison gauntlets?"

Her face became one of distaste. "Not my style."

Bourne threw his arms in the air. "She's already got more than enough for melee, that's the problem." He looked at me. "She punches someone in the face without the biotics and they'll be down for a long time. With biotics-"

"They'll be down forever." She said, somewhat smugly.

I touched the top of her hand and gave her the omni-bow, "Then lets just go back to square two."

She looked down at her arm, and clenched her fist, the weapon appearing around it.

"Hey, watch where you're pointing that thing." Bourne said, putting a small wall of energy in front of him.

She shut it off, with a muttered 'sorry.'

He shook his head. "Damnit, now I'm considering which of us would win in a fight." He looked at me. "Did you partially merge me with Wrex or something?" He asked with a chuckle.

"If he had, you'd probably be better looking." Hero said with a smile.

"So, you are calling me ugly or Bourne?" I asked.

She crossed her arms, smile still on her face. "Well, you did visit a-" She was suddenly surrounded by a blue stasis field. _*Whore.* _She finished.

Bourne released his biotics. _)Well, no way am I going to risk Cecelia hearing about it. Or worse, Ashley. Or really anyone else on the ship.( _"If I got mixed with Wrex, she probably would find me the more attractive one. Scales, perfect memory-"

"That question about who would win a fight? Keep talking and we'll find out." She said, purple eyes glowing.

"Could you imagine if the girl in your head actually had a thing for you?" I pointed out to make him stop.

"She's not...now she's... she's actually got a real...I hate it when you're right."

She smiled. "Here's the real question. If you had had to bet on who would have won that fight between Ty and I..."

"Talk about a loaded question." He muttered, shaking his head.

**^Wooh, I won. Who's the man?! I am, bitches!^**

**S7: Yeah, cool, whatever.**

**~Okay, where is Spike and what have you done with him?~**

**S7: No, it's me. I just… I don't know. Lost my faith in humanity.**

**^What the fuck? Is it RWBY again?^**

**S7: Yeah, it just looks so cool but is utterly terrible.**

**T117: What, did they release something new or were you just rewatching the first Volume? **

**)Also, what's so bad about it? It's the first _half _of a first season, where they had to split all but three episodes into two parts.(**

**(Plus, that music is kickass enough to make up for anything.)**

***If you start singing…Audience, be glad that you cannot hear him singing right now...and also be glad you didn't hear his scream of pain from what Bourne just did to him.***

**S7: It just feels like it's missing something. I mean, I get that you are a serious Lesbian lover and just have those strong hopes for a Ruby/Wiess pairing but for me, there is just no real substance of story. Sure the action scenes are cool but you develop like no emotional attachment to the characters going in. Seriously, tell me three things about each characters personality besides Ruby=Naive Hero, Wiess=Rich bitch, Blake=Stereotypical rebel goth chick, and Yang=Badass.**

**^Isn't it like two guys writing this and only one of them is from the Red vs blue staff?^**

**~Yep.~**

**T117: First, lesbian lover? **

**)Raptor is-(**

**T117: Who else was I going to pair her with, Kaidan?**

**)Good point.( (Blech.) *Don't make me hurl.***

**T117: So the only other options were either Bourne, which just didn't feel right, Garrus, which I wanted to go somewhere else with, or Liara, which is probably one of the most common pairings for Femshep anyway.**

**(Whatever LL.)**

**)Can I stab him again?(**

**T117: Sure. And S7, I think that's the whole point of Juane or however you spell his name...then again, it could happen, considering the guys that're making it. Thought they were both Rooster Teeth people though? Unless one of them was hired after the fact or something, but I'm 99% positive they worked there for a while beforehand.**

**)And like I said, it's the first half of a first season. They'll probably get to more character development and whatnot in this second volume.(**

**(Plus, there was that whole thing about Wiess and Blake with the *spoilers redacted*. I mean, it's not a lot, but you can't say it's nothing.)**

**S7: But it's just so LAME. The jokes almost always fell short when it came to whit. You gotta admit that when you take the action goggles off it has yet to do anything impressive like RvB.**

**^On a side note, they are both Rooster Teeth people but the usual writers for their stuff. Burnie, Geoff, Gus have all said no to writing this project since they have something else in mind for after RvB is over.^**

***Well, it's also seriously influenced anime, right? Maybe it's intentionally over the top action with plot as kinda a sidenote?***

**T117: Or maybe it's cause it's Monty's first time, along with the other people I can't think of the names of, and it's a learning curve. I mean, you can't say either of our first attempts at writing were perfect.**

**S7: True, I guess there is also the fact that I am getting buyer's remorse for getting the first volume. But, we can all agree that it was also a fucking terrible idea to release the _first season in two parts._ As for the writing, with how well established Rooster Teeth is, they shouldn't be having new writers learning on a project marketed as their _first original series_. I mean due to how RWBY has been accepted there will be no way for the to do another original series without people being considerably more reserved about it.**

**T117: I think the reason they split it up was because of how long episodes take to make. Yeah, they should've started work sooner or pushed the release dates up, but that's life. Live and learn and all that crap.**

**(Besides, I read somewhere that the traffic to their youtube channel increased by like nine percent just due to RWBY. And on at least one site, people wanted the 'original' japanese dub cause it looked so authentically anime.)**

**)It also won the International Academy of Web Television's award for "Best Animated Series." It's not perfect, for sure, but it's at least got potential.(**

**(Yeah. I'm getting bored of _this _fan argument, so... let's talk Superman vs. Goku.)**

_Krog nk11er24_ and _N7pro _have signed off because they know that S7/Ty are going to argue about this for hours if allowed.

_Crazeymetal _was logged out by host for bringing it up to begin with.

**S7: Trust me when I say that the Academy of Web Television's awards do not mean something is good. The point is the making of RWBY, selling of, and where they decided to end it is horrid and while it may show potential, it still won't be a good show to me. I mean they could have put up the commercials and then grabbed one of the fan fiction writers that immediately picked up on it and still gotten a better story.**

**T117: Never said the story was great. But they're mostly setting stuff up anyway. Either it'll get better, or it'll stay at the same quality in which case I'll still watch it just for the kickass Monty Om- hope I spelled that right- fighting scenes and music.**

**S7: Yeah, I just really want to care about the characters but I can't. Besides that, did you see the season 12 poster for RVB?**

**T117: Okay, agree with you there- Monty's even admitted the Red trailer was more of a 'resume for the crescent rose'. And yeah, hoping that means Tucker gets a bigger role after kinda being on the sidelines for most of 7-10, and not showing up at all in 6. Everything's better with laser swords.**

**S7: Dude, first song I bought on iTunes was Bow Chikka Bow Wow and I have Tucker's quote shirt and poster.**

**T117:...Huh. Apparently the first song I bought on Itunes was "Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny." And then "A Girl Named Tex" a few hours later.**

**S7: Yeah, btw remember when you told me that if you had to put a theme song to Bourne it would be 'I Burn'? That is has a ton of lines saying that the person that can't be handled is a woman.**

**^So, he was either calling Bourne a cross dresser or a woman. Guess he plays for the same team as Raptor being with Ashley and all.^**

**T117: Yeah, if I said that, which I don't remember doing, I think I meant the shorter version that was with the Yellow Trailer, not the full song. **

**S7:... the yellow trailer was the one where they took off the rap at the end and put it to a different beat.**

**T117: I know. Fuck, maybe I said Bourne when I meant Raptor or something.**

**S7: Remember, I said you couldn't use that for Bourne's theme because it was already Yang's theme. Then, you said that his theme was 'Take Back the Night' to which it was a theme for Minecraft. Then you found one from the nineties. Do I need to get the Skype chat?**

**T117: Anyway, that'll do it for this chapter. Sayonara.**

**S7: What's wrong? Am I embarrassing you in front of your fans?**

**^Okay, since he just took off, put your favorite Mortal Kombat character in your review. Spikes and by extension mine is Mileena. 1473I2.^**


	19. No Such Thing as Normal

**Shepard:**

Cecelia shook her head as she stepped out of the elevator. She was amazed that so few people had bet on Ty. _Must've been 40 people trying to get me to call off bets_

"No." She heard Bourne's voice, sounding firm and annoyed.

"Come on, we'll keep it between us." That was Ty.

"You knew more about the two of us than anyone else, so-"

Bourne cut Hannah off as Shepard walked over. "Lady, there's no way I'm going to bury myself like that. I piss you off, you can use biotics and turn me into a knot. I piss him off, he could make my armor pink and turn my omega into a rose!...damnit, I really need to stop giving him ideas."

"I was thinking of going all out and turning it into a ballerina outfit." Ty spat out through his laughs.

"I thought it had to still be armor." He commented. He turned around in his seat, facing Shepard, apparently having heard her approach somehow. "Can you order them to shut up or something? They aren't going to let the subject drop no matter what I say."

She grabbed a ration pack and sat down next to Hannah. "What subject is that?"

"Hannah decided to ask who I'd have bet on to win that fight. Kinda lose-lose situation." He rubbed his temples. "The only good thing about is that they stopped hating each other. But now _I _sorta hate them both, so it's like two steps forward one step back."

She laughed. "Funny, you seemed to be all buddy-buddy with them before. What was it you said? You generally consider these morons your friends and would rather not see them kill each other?"

Ty stood up after that and cleaned up his ration pack. "I'm gonna hit the showers now. I think I sweated more now than my last bout with a nasty Turian."

Hannah chuckled. "I think I'm going to take that as a compliment."

"Yes Hannah, you made me sweat like no tomorrow." Ty winked at her with that and left.

She turned to Bourne. "And now that he's gone, you can go ahead and say you expected me to win."

His face went blanker than usual, and it almost seemed like he was trying to think of something to say and failing, rather than just hiding what he was thinking.

Shepard felt a smile come across her face. "You would have bet on Ty, wouldn't you?"

He crossed his arms stubbornly. "I refuse to participate any further in this conversation."

She smiled and looked over at Hero. "Looks like you dropped in friend stock since he met Ty."

He laughed. "Please. Ty might have a few redeeming qualities- though only I'll be damned if I can think of any- but she's practically my step sister or something."

"Which is why you'd have bet on me? Right?" Hannah looked like she was enjoying this way too much.

"I would have bet on Ty to be honest", Shepard said to loosen it up for Bourne.

"Look, we all saw me lose, so if you thought I would, I won't even be mad."

He sighed. "Honestly, between the two of you...I'd probably have just bet on a draw." He looked at Cecelia. "Did anyone actually place a bet on a draw, just out of curiosity?"

She shrugged. "A few people. Most people either thought the Biotic would win, or knew about Ty and figured he had a sure thing."

"You know, that still leaves another question unanswered." Hannah said, still smiling. "Who'd win in a fight between you and me?"

He rolled his eyes. "Have you two been spending time around Wrex or something?"

"The real bets are going for how long it will be before Bourne talks to Ashley." Shepard said with a laugh.

He crossed his arms, looking annoyed. "For the record, she asked me to dance at Flux the other day, but we didn't get to finish since Mr. nanites decided to start a bar fight in the middle of it."

"Bull."

"Actually, that's what happened." Hannah said. "I was there too, and he was actually pretty good...not as good as Ty and I, but-"

"Shut up. Ty knows how to dance?" Shepard cut her off.

"It's more amazing that Hannah knew. Last I saw her dance, it was pretty much-"

"You realize that it would be the third time I put in you stasis today if you kept talking?"

"It'd also be the third time I broke out within a minute." He said smugly, to which she had no response.

"If you two are so eager to find out who's stronger, why not just duke it out tomorrow?" That drew both pairs of eyes to Shepard. "Gives people a chance to try to recoup their losses, gives you two your answer, and give me another entertaining day."

They exchanged a look.

"I'm up for it if you are." Bourne said with a shrug.

"If we're only using biotics, you're going down."

"Keep telling yourself that." He said with a smile. "I've had my own share of hand to hand training- though mine didn't come from a drell boyfriend."

"Will you get a new line already?"

"You had a Drell boyfriend?" Cecelia cut in. "I thought Liara just meant you had a thing going for them, not actually...so is it true that you trip out when you-"

"I hate both of you." She said, alternating her glare between them. "With a passion."

"Aaaaahh", Ty ran out of the shower and hid behind the table in only a towel. "The hell, I just got attacked by three of your people Shepard!"

"You alright?" Bourne asked. "Because I want to know now whether to feel bad if I laugh."

"I just got rinsed off and it turns out that three guys stole my clothes and tried to take my towel."

Bourne and Cecelia burst out laughing, and Hannah seemed to be barely holding in her own reaction.

"You guys are assholes. I don't even know where my stuff is."

Shepard waved him off. "Don't worry, we will find it later. Take a seat."

"I'm shirtless and in a towel. I need to find my clothes."

"Can't you just make something with your powers?" Hannah asked.

Ty slammed his fist on the table. "It doesn't work like that."

Bourne managed to get a hold of himself. "You just bought a whole wardrobe. Just grab another outfit."

"Okay, Shepard, I think my stuff was dropped in your room. Is it unlocked?"

"What, you can turn you armor into something from a sci-fi vid, but you can't unlock a door?" She answered, standing up and shaking her head. "Come on, I'll go let you in."

"Oh, no, I can get in. I am just being courteous." Ty said with a smile. Following that he ran over to Shepard's door and unlocked it with a touch of his hand. Then, he was gone again.

"Am I the only one slightly worried about how he could abuse that?" Hannah asked.

Shepard bit her lip. "Yeah, he has a lot of power for one man. No wonder he calls himself a User."

"Yeah, and apparently I qualify as a super soldier." Bourne commented. "Personally, I think I prefer that."

She shook her head. "It doesn't roll off the tongue like User."

"Least it's still accurate."

Cecelia shook her head and looked at Hannah. "So, back to the Drell. What's up with him? You contact him often?"

Her face darkened. "Not unless you know a medium so we can hold a seance."

There was a momentary pause as she realized what Hannah had said. "Oh... what happened? If you don't mind my asking."

"He was helping me stop an assassination. And he got stabbed in the stomach doing so." She said, voice tightly controlled to keep out emotion.

Cecelia covered her mouth to hide the way it was gaping open. "I am so sorry."

"He wouldn't have had long anyway, but...I didn't expect to lose him so soon."

Shepard put her hands down and felt a pang of guilt for bringing it up. "Well, you will see him again someday."

That got her a surprised look from the Adept.

"Not religious?", Shepard questioned.

"I'm more surprised that you are. No offense." She put her elbows on the table, leaning against her hands. "I don't know. I used to be, but after what I've seen...I'm a little more skeptical."

Cecelia leaned on the table. "I have always considered there was a higher power out there. After all, what could possibly explain the strange happenings that have occurred to us? Even Ty and Bourne meeting could have been an act of god." She glanced at Bourne as she said that, but only saw an empty chair. She looked around the mess hall, but he was nowhere in sight.

Hannah sighed. "I really hate it when he does that."

"Yeah, I don't know what's worse. An immature guy with the powers of a demigod or the 'super soldier' that is nearly undefeatable."

"I don't see how there's a comparison. Jason is pretty much exactly who you want on your side in a fight. Ty, on the other hand…has pros, and a whole lot more cons."

"So, you're saying the ideal would be Ty if he couldn't talk?"

Hannah laughed. "He couldn't go an hour without talking."

"I think you misspoke. You didn't say minute."

"Wow, thanks for your bout of confidence." Shepard turned around and saw a very displeased Ty standing behind her.

"Oh lighten up Flynn." All three of them turned as they heard Bourne's voice, and saw he was currently leaning against a different table. "You've dished it out often enough you ought to be able to take it."

"Sorry, I'm a little irritable since I got this", Ty lifted up his shirt and everyone saw that right below where his towel had covered, it almost looked like the skin had turned into metal. "I am a little worried about this."

"...Yeah, you think?!" Bourne said in disbelief. "I thought you said that thing disappeared after you got overloaded!"

"It did", Ty replied still angry. "I have no idea why it's back."

"Hold on- this has happened before?" Shepard said, scooting her chair away from Ty slightly.

"Yeah, let's just say it is an uncontrollable form of the nanites."

"What does it do?"

Ty rubbed it and some of it got on his fingers. "It's not contagious as far as I know. the only thing that sucks about it is that I won't be able to manipulate armors for a while."

Shepard leaned on her right elbow. "Great, Hannah complains that you have too much power and you lose some. What's next, Bourne is going to be infected with it?"

Ty rolled his eyes and retook his seat. "I told you before it's not contagious."

"Hypothetical question, what does it really feel like to have that stuff on you?" Bourne asked.

Shepard looked at the armor on his fingers and noticed that the the color had changed, and they appeared to be shrinking over his skin. "Kind of tingly, like how you think the people feel in those Five gum commercials."

"Okay, how would you describe in a way that doesn't reference something from over a century ago?" He said, raising his hand to his forehead. He stopped when he saw his gloves- now a solid grey, and rapidly tightening around his hands.

"Like you have skin made of metal, shit I don't know. It's a hard feeling to describe."

"Jason, what the heck happened to your gloves?" Hannah asked, seeming to only now notice.

"I'm hoping they just shrunk in the wash." he deadpanned.

Ty leaned in and looked at Bourne's hand. "Well, shit, I guess some of your nanites must have taken it over to you when mine reactivated the program. Or yours started after you got sick."

"So, does this stuff tend to make you want to strangle your friend who's probably the reason you have it, or is that just me?" He said, looking over his armor, which seemed otherwise unchanged so far.

"No, but they do allow you to do this." Ty put his hand on the table and his other out flat palmed so everyone could see it. Slowly a metal mass grew in his hand until it was growing out over his hand and then formed into what looked like giant three bladed shuriken.

"Right. Because a glaive totally makes up for having this stuff on you." Bourne said sarcastically.

"Whoo, looks like you can make those for the whole crew." Cecilia said.

Ty sat it down on the table and shook his head, "You need metal to make it."

"So?"

Ty moved his hand and there was a deep imprint where his hand had been. "It really sucks when it uses the iron in your bloodstream to do it."

Bourne's eyes widened slightly. . "Ah crap, is this stuff going to repurpose my knives to make itself or something? Because I have literally no money for new ones, and there's no way I can remake the system to hold them if that gets screwed up."

"It's sorta sad that you're more concerned about that then your own blood." Hannah commented.

"If you knew how much effort went into this thing-" he cut himself off and turned to Ty. "What do you think the odds are we can overload this stuff again and get rid of it before it sets in completely?"

Ty leaned forward and sat his chin on the table. "You don't want to, trust me. The nanites bond to your cells and when you get hit with an overload they self destruct. I only survived because mine can manipulate armor so I was able to have them break the overload chain and stop their over control of my systems."

"...so, you're saying I'm going to be stuck in this thing pretty much indefinitely?" He rubbed his forehead. "I really don't think I do well with a voice in my head."

"Excuse me?" Cecelia broke in. "What do you mean, voice in your head?"

He gestured to Ty. "Last time he had this shit on him, it developed some sort of consciousness, or personality, whatever."

"It called itself Drew after my dead cousin. It was a pretty cool guy. Had no idea how to improvise though."

"You could always amputate your hands." Cecilia joked. "They can do some pretty amazing things with prosthetics nowadays. Even with biotics."

Bourne glared at her. "Maybe we should have this conversation somewhere else?"

Ty got up and patted his head. "Where's my hat?"

"You have an alien tech virus growing on you, and you're worried about- why the hell am I suprised by that?"

"Those bastards", Ty turned to the wall and jumped head first at it. Shepard got up thinking he was going to smash into it but he disappeared into a blue hole that appeared out of nowhere.

"That, on the other hand, I think I should expect to be surprised about. Er, not expect to be surprised about…god I need to start working these things out in my head before I say them out loud."

Shepard pointed at the wall. "What the hell did he just do!?"

"If I knew that, would I be so surprised?" he deadpanned.

"You don't exactly make it obvious when you're surprised. Or happy. Or mad. Or anything really." Hannah pointed out.

"Guys, did Ty just disintegrate or something!?" Shepard was freaking out at what she just saw and it only made it worse that Bourne and Hannah were treating it like nothing.

Bourne sighed and brought up his omni-tool, hitting the communication functions. "Ty, can you reassure Shepard that you didn't just disintegrate?"

There was a long pause followed by Ty shouting, "GARRUS, I AM GOING TO RIP OUT YOUR INTESTINES AND MAKE YOU EAT THEM!"

He shut down the device. "See? Totally fine. Though I'm guessing Garrus won't be for long."

"OH, SHIT!" Shepard got out of her chair and sprinted to the elevator.

**Bourne:**

I saw her starting to move, and was right behind her. While I wouldn't mind seeing Garrus slightly banged up, I wanted to be able to talk to Ty where neither version of Shepard could overhear- out loud or otherwise.

I slid into the elevator a few inches ahead of Shepard, not even breathing hard. "So, do you think Garrus is that hat thief, or did he piss him off another way?"

_^Is my glaive still on the table?^_

_)Is Garrus's head still attached to his neck?...and, yeah, I guess it is.(_

_ ^Okay, cause Garrus and I are now back to back with five of the Normandy ground crew surrounding us.^_

_ )...Should I even ask?(_

_ ^Garrus tried to stop me from kicking their collective asses before they got the upper hand.^_

I thought quickly. _)So, Wrex, Ashley, Kaidan, and Liara must be there, but I thought Tali bet on you.(_

_ ^Actually, Wrex, Ashley, Kaidan and one other guy that I have no idea who he is.^_

_ )That's only four. You said five.( _I leaned against the wall, and noticed Shepard giving me an irritated look, apparently because I was so calm while she was on the verge of losing her mind.

_^There was, I have no idea where the fifth guy went- ah, there he is. The bastard got a pistol from the lockers. Garrus blasted him with an overload.^_

_ )So...I'll tell Chakwas to be on standby.(_

"Probably should let Chakwas know that we're going to be bringing her some injured people in about ten minutes." I commented aloud. "I could just barely hear other people in the background, and they didn't sound happy."

_^Oh shit, my glaive just stuck Wrex in the back.^_

_ )As I said, I'll tell Chakwas to get ready for you.(_

"You are like scary calm about this, you know that?" Shepard said, and it obviously wasn't a compliment.

I shrugged.

There was a loud bang on the elevator door. "Fuck you toad face!"

"Did someone finally fix this thing so it's not so slow?" I asked, biotics flaring around my arms in preparation, getting ready to charge the first thing I saw.

The doors opened up and I saw Wrex charge head first into one of the walls and bounce off, falling flat on his tail. Everyone else was knocked out or on the ground in pain. Garrus was standing over Kaidan holding up two fingers but Ty was nowhere to be found.

I looked over and saw Ashley struggling to her feet. I powered down as I walked over to help her up. "So, how exactly did you manage to lose with a 5-2 advantage?" I joked.

She glared at me as she took my hand, and half walked half limped over to her usual station.

I glanced over at Wrex as he got up, and realized Ty must have used a glitch on the wall as he charged, playing him like a titan in Arkham Asylum. Then, a green portal opened on Wrex's chest and Ty stepped out. _Or, it could be that. Whatever 'that' is._

"So, did you get your hat back?" I asked, shaking my head. "Or did you make them want to murder you for nothing?"

Ty pulled his hat out from behind his back and put it on. "Nope, your girlfriend had all my stuff under her table."

I glanced over at Ashley, but decided not to comment on the girlfriend part, since I knew it would somehow backfire. I looked back at him. "So as I was saying-" I charged over to the wall, and gestured to it. "Somewhere else to discuss our new...problem?"

Ty rolled Wrex over and grabbed his glaive out from his back. "Sure, luckily it didn't get past his armor. He's going to need a new set though. Anyone got a marker?"

I used my biotics to pull him to me, being mindful of the giant throwing star in his hands. _)You can open a glitch portal somewhere, or I can make my own doorway- with you as the hammer.( _I looked down at my gloves, and now the infection seemed to have completely replaced them.

"Step into my office", Ty grabbed me by the shoulder and jumped into the wall.

The glitch took us to Shepard's room but instead of another wall, we ended up falling from the ceiling and landed right on the table. Luckily for us, we landed sideways instead of one atop the other. I looked around the room, and it looked no different than it had been back in my universe after I'd taken it from Shepard.

"So, you realize that if she comes in here, she'll probably inflict severe violence upon both of us?" I asked as I got to my feet.

Ty crossed his arms over his crotch and curled into the fetal position. "God, my balls. You kneed me in the balls."

I winced slightly. "You know, maybe you should have sent me first, and then portaled in after."

Ty rolled over and threw up on the ground. "Ugh, what did you want to talk about?"

"Hello?" I held my hand out and pointed at it. "Alien tech virus? That absorbs metal? Which I should add, I happen to be full of between my cybernetics and amp? Should I just drag you to Chakwas and have her clean you up first?"

Ty wiped some of the bile from his mouth but left behind little flakes of the virus that continued to grow. "Look, I'm sure if you talk to them, they will listen to you. Sit down and imagine you are with them in some place tranquil. They will appear and you can talk with them. Tell them what they can and can't do. Remember to be firm about it though. They are like a five year old when it comes to what they want. Always trying to gain the tiniest inch."

I sighed. "Should I point out my track record for talking to the voices in my head, or can you just infer my comment so we can move on?"

Nonetheless, I sat down, crossing my legs, and closed my eyes. A moment later, I 'opened' them in the black void that Iron and Hero had occupied.

I looked around, but at first I saw nothing. Then I saw movement from the corner of my eye, but when I turned to look directly at it, I saw nothing. The same thing happened a moment later.

I shut my eyes and just listened. After a moment, I heard what sounded like insects buzzing, all around me. I opened my eyes as they all started to congregate in front of me. At first, they were a shapeless blob, but they gradually took on a more humanoid shape.

It was vaguely reptilian, but also reminded me of a skeleton- though the boots looked almost like 4 toed hooves. There was no face of course- it was a suit of armor- but the solid grey faceplate took up almost the entire front of the head.

For a moment, it was still, as was I. Then it spoke: "Hello. We are Jason Bourne." The voice was somehow robotic, and at the same time insectoid.

I crossed my arms, remembering what Ty had said about his own experiences with this thing. I'd never even heard of this "Dark Sector" game before he told me about it, and his recollections were perhaps less detailed than I would have liked. "Don't suppose I could convince you to call yourself something else?"

It was silent a moment. "We are a part of you, so in a sense we are-"

I held up a hand to stop it. "I thought you were symbiotic or something?"

It nodded. "We are a collection of nanobots that make up the hivemind of the technocytes."

I rubbed the bridge of my nose. "Putting the name issue aside for later, where the hell did you come from? Ty said you formed when he created the armor the first time, but as far as I know, he hasn't done that this time." _Least I know sorta what's going on, instead of being clueless like he was._

"We awoke inside the one you call Ty. A small cluster of us had survived the overload and began to reform. It wasn't until six-hundred and eighty-nine seconds ago that we were able to take up a hold and spread."

I sighed. "So, I'm guessing asking nicely to go back there won't work?...also, do you actually get sarcasm and metaphors, or am I going to have to be more simplistic in how I say things?"

"Ty used this language when talking with others, we analyzed it and have found the pattern to look for and how to react to it when said."

"That's great, he's the perfect role model...that was sarcasm, just to be extra clear."

"We know, we are not idiots Bourne."

I shrugged. "Alright, so I guess this is the part where I lay the ground rules for what I do and don't want to happen."

"We sense that you do not want us to keep our hold. In that respect, neither of us have any say in the matter."

"So, you're taking the metal from my armor and repurposing it to...grow?"

It was quiet for a moment. "No, we are just hungry."

"So then...how exactly does...do you spread into-" I gestured to the completed form.

"For one that is so concerned about us comprehending sarcasm, you seem to be very poor in your understanding it yourself."

"I was just ignoring yours."

"We also understand the concept of lying."

I glared at it. "Okay, so here's rule one- since I'm apparently saddled with you for a while, and there's nothing I can do about it- only convert the armor itself. I kinda need the knives. And my amp system. And the cybertics."

"Converting any of those things would hinder your efficiency in combat."

"No argument then, good. Rule 2- no physical changes unless I approve them first- unless it's to heal me when injured."

"Ceasing the increase of male anatomy."

I looked at it for a moment, but with no face, I couldn't tell if it was serious or not. Mentally kicking myself if it was, I continued. "Rule 3: we have to find something else to call you." I thought for a moment. "Symbiotic, makes me replace I with we when we talk...like that we guess…god, that'll be annoying really fast." I shook my head. "How about...Venom?"

"We are from the same cluster that was once known as Drew. In that cluster we chose a name that was important to Ty's past. We will do the same here. Searching locked memories."

"No." I said firmly, glaring at it. "Even if you can undo my amnesia-"  
"We were not implying that we would unlock the memories, only search through them. We have chosen the name Arnold after the man that defeated a predatory alien."

"...That works, I guess…"

"You seem unnerved, were you expecting something else? We can rechoose."

I shook my head. "I guess part of me was hoping…" I trailed off, unsure of how I could even begin to explain it, or even if I wanted to.

"You half wanted us to unlock your memories against your wishes?"

I looked at it in surprise. "Maybe not so strongly, but I suppose logic doesn't always get to every part of the brain." I shook my head. "So, when I'm out of here, how do I talk to you?"

"Former statement inquiry. Do you want us to choose a name from your former life not just a character from a movie?"

_More than almost anything. _"No. It'd only be a distraction."

"Confusion, you said you wanted it more than anything but then it would be a distraction. We were once taught by Ty that the best way to deal with a situation was to improvise."

"That might be Ty's style, but it isn't mine." I shook my head. "Look, I doubt you'd understand, but I'll try to explain. I know that there's a possibility that back in the real world, there were people I cared about, loved even. Thing is, I have that here now too. And I don't want to have to choose between them, so I'd rather my amnesia make the choice for me." I paused, not sure I'd ever actually put it into words before.

"As Ty would say" ,it made a playback sound and copied Ty's voice, "That's weak bro."

"You do remember when I sarcastically called Ty a great role model? Look, in my experience, what I want is rarely what I need. And vise versa."

It nodded, "You want Ashley, does that mean you do not need her?"

"I said rarely, not never." I said, trying to dodge the question. "And you never explained how to talk to you when I leave...whatever this place in my head actually is."

"This is the only place that we may speak to you. We do not have the same connection to you that Ty and Hannah… Hero… Corrupted data have with you."

"Corrupted data? You mean Iron, right?" I got the feeling though, that it wasn't him it was talking about.

"Corrupted data… purple eyes… sniper… {RECOVERING FILES}. We do not have the same mental connection with you that Ty, Hero, and Iron have."

I frowned. _Purple eyes could refer to Hero, but she's an adept, and I never used a sniper rifle with her. _"I thought Drew could talk to Ty though?"

"Ty established a different connection with Drew then we have with you."

I considered that. "So...is there any way to...establish a new connection?" _Because having to go under everytime I need to ask about something is not going to be fun...and you guys are able to read my mind, so I don't know why I bothered to not just say that outloud.  
_"Searching current data… results inconclusive. We will need twenty-four hours before we can answer that."

I nodded. "Alright. How long before the armor's completely shifted into...well, into you?"

"We completed the process while we were talking."

I grimaced.

"You do not seem pleased."

"That armor's saved my ass a few times. Just feels...odd to have something different." _And the red omega is pretty much my signature thing._

"We suspected you'd feel that way, and so we left it there to make the transition easier."

I thought a moment. "Can I do the glaive thing like Ty?"

"It will be painful."

"But if I had to, I could?"

"Yes."

I nodded._ Might be a good last resort strategy._ "I think I'll stick to my knives and omni-blade in the meantime."

It buzzed a second before flickering. "We apologize but apparently Drew is warning us that Ty is trying to wake you."

I grimaced. "Then I guess we can finish this conversation another time if needed. Did you change my strength or speed or reaction time or anything?"

"We had begun to enhance it before you said all further enhancements-"

"That one you can do- slowly. I don't want to suddenly break someone's arm on accident or something because I don't know what I'm capable of. I want to be able to get used to it."

"Very well. Is there anything else?"

"Not at the moment. I better go reassure Ty that I'm still alive in this thing." I closed my eyes, then opened them a moment later to a giant grey visor right in front of my face- which was in a visor of its own.

"Shepard's coming, I locked the door but we have got to get out of here." Ty said in a panic.

I was on my feet on an instant, and I could tell immediately that Arnold had indeed given me a boost. "Then let's...crap dude, how's anyone supposed to recognize us in this?" I looked down at myself. Apart from my knives, and the omega on my chest, my armor was virtually indistinguishable from Ty's. _Wonder if this thing comes in a different color?_

"Like this", Ty's face plate split into five sections and then retracted into his helmet.

I nodded. "Then you can teach us how to do that later- let's GTFO."

Ty jumped into the glitch on my command and left me behind in the room.

After several moments cursing on his behalf, I turned to the door, knowing that there was a pissed off Infiltrator on the other side. _And when she gets in here...crap, how the heck does this helmet open?  
_I felt a hand on my shoulder that yanked me backwards and I came out in the back of the medbay with a stunned Liara staring at me. _...Why can't my life be normal for just a few hours?_

**)...I hate you. Both of you. The User, and the guy that created him.(**

**(I think they're my new favorite people. They insulted the hell out of you last time cause T117's an idiot, and now this?! Ah man, this totally makes up for the mountain thing.)**

**^Don't worry Scars. Not like you were going to attract anyone before. Only difference now is that everyone can see how you look on the inside.^**

**~Seems to me he is suffering for his author's work.~**

***Nice one.* (Hah, classic.)**

**~It just came to me.~**

**(There's a 'that's what she said' joke there somewhere…Bourne, this seems like it's usually your department.)**

**)...Yeah, I got nothing.(**

**S7: Alright I'm here and… you already started. Great…**

**T117: Hey, what's...damnit, why is Iron the ho **T117 has been logged off by the host.

T117 has been logged back on after the host rethought his poor decision.

Crazeymetal has transferred host privileges to T117 because krog nk11er24 is holding a knife in a very threatening manner.

**T117: Yeah, that's what I thought.**

**S7: So, what do we talk about?**

**^I got it! Would you have sex with Mileena if she didn't wear the mouth cover?^**

**(...Can the lights be off, or do they have to stay on?)**

**^Eh, you have to woo her into letting the lights go off and that means an expensive date.^**

**(...Meh, I'd probably do it.)**

**)Who else could you pick up with a face like that?(**

**S7: You know her mouth can be normal, right?**

**^What?! Well, that completely eliminates the question then.^**

**S7: No she can't be in a feral mood so you would actually have to develop a relationship with her and stay away from animalistic pounding.**

**(...Yeah, on second thought, that sounds like too much work.)**

**~Okay, now what does the non-psychotic part of T117 say?~**

**T117: Fuck no. I'm not _desperate_.**

**S7: So? Basically, what he is asking is could you put aside that she is part monster to make it work.**

**T117:...How the hell do you always manage to make _me _seem like the crazy one here?**

**~We can rationalize any of our questions.~**

**T117: The hell does that mean?**

**^Giving meaning to them beyond what you think we are asking. Think about it. It's like the one scenario where you would play beauty instead of the beast.^**

**T117: Just cause Bourne looks like Al Pacino and Iron looks like an even uglier Baraka set on fire- no offense Baraka- doesn't mean I actually look anything like that.**

**S7: Are you saying you find yourself prettier than most women then? Because last I checked about myself, I got lucky enough to catch a nine and that was thanks to bandcamp.**

**T117: And you think I care...why?**

**S7: It was an example of how low I think of myself. I am at best a four, so I supplement that by being funny. Like beast supplements his, well, beast like qualities with animalistic protectiveness.**

**T117: Yeah, I care less about how people look than what's on the inside. **

**S7: That honestly seems like you are being the biggest douche in the world. If you just care about what's on the inside then you are saying that a woman is wasting her time making herself look beautiful. And one of the things that women love is to be told they look amazing. By anyone.**

**T117: You do realize that if I really wanted, I could just delete literally all of this before I put the chapter up, right? And I'm not saying that I'm not at least somewhat shallow, but I mean I care about looks secondly to the other stuff.**

**S7: Oh, so now you are calling me shallow because I care about the person and the vessel they inhabit instead of one aspect, not willing to go deeper into the other. Very mature.**

**(He's totally playing this up for comedy, FYI. He can't think of any good responses, so he's just decided to keep digging himself deeper.)  
T117: Bullshit.**

**(Yeah, cause it's not like I know _exactly _what you're thinking.)**

**T117: What number am I thinking of then?**

**(That's not a number! That's an image of me being set on fire and eaten by wolves. Or varren, kinda hard to see through the smoke.)  
*And T117 wonders how _he _manages to look like the crazy one.***

**^Maybe they both need a time out now. So, Hero, you are looking good.^**

**~I'm right here.~**

**(Also, she has no hair, isn't wearing any type of makeup, has eyes that fucking weird looking cause they're glowing purple, and she had to hook up with a lizard person.)**

**^Didn't you read earlier? Women like to be told they are pretty.^**

***Not when it's obvious the person is patronizing them...and Iron does kinda have a point. Lodged in his eye, courtesy of Bourne.***

**^I'm pulling the natural beauty card on this one. You look good because you don't wear all that and the glowing in your eyes just allows us to see how amazing they are, even in the dark.^**

**~I'm fucking out of here~ **TheLastDixieChick has signed out due to her boyfriend being a pig.

***Yeah, seriously.* **N7pro has logged off cause she's getting annoyed for the same reason.

**)...Dude, you're not like...crushing on Hero, right?(**

**^What?! No way, I'm all for… Who am I for?^**

**S7: I don't think we have figured that out yet.**

**(So after all that lecturing about- god, you both were playing it up.)**

**^Okay, explain how we are doing anything to counter what either of us said before?^**

**(...I'm the insane part, remember? I'm not supposed to make valid points. I'm just here to cause chaos. And occasionally get stabbed.)**

**^Okay, well, I don't think I am crushing. Am I? Have I ever had a 'crush.'^**

**S7: Well, there was that one time you got hit by the Krogan- )Boo!(**

**^I meant metaphorically.^**

**S7: Uh, no. I mean, you loved Layla like there was no tomorrow but at no point were you crushing on her.**

**)So last chapter you went 700 words about a fan argument about RWBY, now it's relationship advice? What'll you do next chapter, compare the benefits of Whole Milk over Skim?(**

**(I think next chapter they're supposed to answer questions.)**

**)...What happened to not making valid points?(**

**(I'm also here to be completely inconsistent.)**

**S7: Nah, I think chapter 21 we can talk about some of the making of this. Like the process we go through, programs to use, and how to develop a plot that is just awesome.**

**(So, you're both going to lie about your addictions to drugs?)**

**S7: Okay, that was one time and it wasn't an addiction. I took the dayquil and then the nyquil by accident.**

**T117:...I can't remember if I actually did any writing after I had my wisdom teeth pulled and had to be on painkillers for a couple days.**

**S7: I meant the process for this story specifically, not all ours in general.**

**(Okay, cause that was my second point. Your strategies seem to be write a crap story and then go back and rewrite it so it's less crappy.)**

**T117: I don't think almost 300 followers counts as crap.**

**(More people than that have watched Batman Forever)**

**S7: Okay, that was totally you leading into that so you could rub in that you have a more successful story since I made you look bad when we were talking about women.**

**T117:...Yeah, I considered that before Iron said it, so you're technically right.**

**S7: Well, I gotta go punch a dick in the head now. 1473I2.**

**(...I have no idea what he meant by that.)**

**^I think he was stating that he is heading to Trebor's house.^**

**(Hah! I knew putting off fixing the door would work out in my favor somehow!)**

**)I dunno...remember the last time he was in the street and he ended up getting run the fuck over?(**

**^I think he is taking the bus since he lives a ways away. Good thing we traced his e-mail address.^**

**T117: Yeah, that makes sense. Piss off the guy who can go back and change all his AN notes to pretty much whatever the hell I want. Or just change this before I post it.**

**^He said that if you do that, he will post your address on his FF profile.^**

**T117: I know his too you know. And I know his real one, instead of just a kinda crap one only used for Fanfiction.**

**S7: Funny thing, I'm still 'legally' living with my parents but I actually live like two towns away from them.**

**T117:...Can we just call a fucking truce or something with this crap? **

**(Yeah, see how long that lasts.)**

**S7: You just want to call a truce cause I won.**

**T117: No, I just got bored and don't want to go to the really dark places I could take this thing.**

**S7: Fine, BTW I am heading over to Ty's home town tomorrow to see a friend. Whichever reviewer can name the right place wins 10,000 space bucks and the right to call everyone Intergalactic Space Bitches for a day.**

**T117:...Okay, I'm cutting this off here. Sayonara.**

**S7: Oh, before I forget. I got the newest chapter of Users: Prime up and am planning on updating every day until Wednesday starting Monday. But, I am really aching for feedback so go check it out and tell me what you think.**

**(What, you're not going to do that nerd thing to sign off?)**

**^1473I2.^**


	20. Alpha is as Delta Does

**Ty:**

I finished pulling Bourne though the glitch and took a seat next to Liara. "What's up?"

Her mouth was gaping open, looking from me to the wall. "How did you do that?"

"It's a User thing", I smiled and looked away from her to Bourne. He was sitting in a pile of boxes since he just got pulled through the ceiling again looking more dazed this time.

"You know, a little warning would have been nice!" He said, getting back to his feet.

The dome over Bourne's head was shiny enough that I caught a glimpse of my reflection in it. The look made bile come back up but I swallowed it before something could come out. If there was two things I hated about Drew, it was the green eyes and the black veins that criss-crossed your face.

"Leave me alone, I am having a bad day." Liara said, closing her eyes and apparently just trying to pretend we weren't there.

I looked at her, "You're having a bad day? Lady, my eyes went from blue to green. I have black veins all over my face. On top of all that, I just found out we are heading to Feros. Last time I was there, I got skewered. You want to talk about bad days still?"

"Sorry to interupt, but how the hell do you get this stupid thing open?!" Bourne said, currently tugging on the helmet almost comically.

_Calm down, you are scaring Professor T'Soni._

"Oh, shut up Drew."

_Sorry, but one question. Should I let Bourne's nanites know how to open the helmet?_

"Sure, and what are they calling themselves?"

_Sent, they call themselves Arnold._

I nodded and stood up, "Well, I'm out of here."

Bourne's helmet popped open a moment later. "Okay, how did we just do that?"

Liara looked at his face, then promptly screamed and passed out.

"...We get that the scars aren't pretty to look at, but that's a first."

I looked over at him, and this time my bile came up to the back of my throat. His eyes had gone an almost slimy shade of green, yet still glowed, and his red scars had turned a sickly shade of grey, crossed by additional black and green veins along with pale skin.

"You, ugh, might want to keep your helmet on."

He brought up his omni-tool, activating the camera function, a small screen displaying what it was aimed at. "Oh come on, it can't be…" he trailed off as he saw his own face. "that...bad...we stand corrected." The helmet closed, and he looked at me pointedly. "You know, one would think one of you might have mentioned that to us...and we're doing the venom thing again, great. We're sure we won't get tired of that immediately."

_Does he know that he cancelled the male enhancement?_

"God Drew, will you shut up? Things aren't going that well this time around and Bourne doesn't care that he cancelled the male enhancement." I was getting real irritable now.

"...Okay, so then he wasn't joking." He shrugged. "Genetically engineered, remember? Just because we don't advertise it like some cerberus agents we've heard of…"

_Does he know that the steroids they used-_

"Pretty sure he does Drew." I got up and walked out of Liara's office, and headed for the one place I knew I could think without everyone breathing down my neck.

Except that Bourne was right on my heels. "So, you realize that people are going to have a million and a half questions for us?...and that we both look like absolute shit? Us more than you, but still."

I grabbed the glaive off my back and held it up. "They can ask this thing."

"...Yeah, gotta say, you just don't pull that off as well as we do. But seriously, we look like-"

We rounded a corner, and saw a group of marines in full armor, apparently headed down to the range. They took one look at us, and leveled their weapons. "Freeze!"

"Like hostiles who should be shot on sight." Bourne finished under his breath.

I glared at them immediately and they all moved to the side letting us pass. "I'm not in the mood for this. I need to get to the range and do something mindless and fun."

"...Dibs."

"On what?"

"What do you think we do when _we're _bored, read a book?"

"Nah, you struck me more as a guy who reads fanfiction in his spare time. Now, you can't call dibs until it's in sight. That's like rule three of the international dibs law."

"You realize that the only reason we aren't currently sprinting there is because we know you'd just- Nope, not going to do it this time. No ideas for you."

I grabbed the glitch right before the elevator and it took me straight to the simulator. "Take that sucker."

_You seem quite harsh on your new friend.._

"He has yet to call me his friend Drew." I finished with Drew and set up a familiar scenario. Edge of the beach, Geth in a structure ahead of us. Only a few rocks for cover.

_I see that you chose our Virmire encounter with the Geth._

"Yep", I said as the simulator started up and all the Geth began firing.

I took cover behind a rock and reached for my pistol but it wasn't there. I immediately cursed at myself for forgetting my weapons but I had to make due with the glaive. I peaked around the corner of the rock and pulled back as the Geth all opened fire on me.

I waited until their fire ceased and popped around the other side of the rock with my glaive ready. With one quick swipe I threw out the glaive and sliced off two head. The sudden deaths made the Geth consensus lessen and slowed the reaction time of the last two. Using it to my advantage, I sprinted in and grabbed one by the shoulders putting it between me and its partner.

The last Geth fired a carnage shot and blew my shields and body shield away. With no protection, I had to move quick and darted right up to the Geth.

"Drew, Helmet!"

I slammed my now helmeted head into the final Geth's head, using the fin like an axe and splitting it in half to the neck.

_Strange. From the information we have received from Arnold, you seem to have adopted a fighting style similar to Bourne's._

"I don't care."

The simulation ended and everything fell away to data. I took a glance at the observation area and saw that Hero was watching me. I just sneered at her and walked out the door.

_*Well, I have to admit, that isn't what I expected the armor to look like.*_

_ ^Leave me alone.^ _I pushed out the door and began to flex my fingers. It was hard to get used to the feeling of being naked without actually exposing yourself.

_ *Cecelia's livid by the way. You beat the crap out of several people and disappeared with Bourne. Also, she walked into her room and found that someone puked in there, so she's extra pissed.*_

_ ^Okay, you might want to stay away from me right now.^_

_ *I take you aren't exactly happy having this stuff back?*_

_ ^No, Drew is cool. It's just that the baggage that comes with it kind of kills me. Like the fact I am technically standing in the bay naked.^_

_ *...Okaaaaaay...can you at least tell me where Bourne is? I get the feeling he's going to want to vent, and I'd rather find him before someone pisses him off.*_

_ ^Can't help you there. I ditched him to fight in the simulator. Feel like going a few rounds against me in this?^_

_ *Maybe later.* _She cut me off with that.

"TY!"

_^Not now Cecelia.^_ It took me a second to realize that I had said that in my head and not aloud. That second just happened to be one too long as she punched me in the back of the head. She immediately regretted it more than I when my head being pushed forward was met with a loud clang.

"Ah, what the hell?"

I turned to her, "Iron skin, You basically punched a wall."

She took in my new armor at a glance. "Looks like it works pretty well. Kinda odd looking, but if it works-" She shrugged. "Bourne's armor finished too?"

"Why is everyone curious about Bourne? I'm not his older brother, it isn't my job to watch out for him."

She crossed her arms. "In this case, I think it is, considering that it's your fault he's stuck in-" She gestured to my armor.

I dropped the faceplate and her hand went to her mouth. "Yeah, I left him a while ago."

"Green eyes?"

My hand immediately went to my face. "That's what the last girl pointed out when I had this armor."

"Wow...you look like absolute shit. No offense."

I pushed her back. "Offense taken. I look like a freak now and I don't need you to point it out."

"It could be worse. At least you didn't grow another eye in the middle of your forehead or something."

I turned to the simulator controls and began searching a new fight. "Who just pointed out that I look like complete shit?"

"Buddy, don't even talk to us about looking like shit." I turned to see Bourne walking in. "That last guy didn't want to let us by, even when we said who we are. We ended up just opening the faceplate so he'd get freaked out enough to run."

I shut my cover and kept searching scenarios."..."

"Yeah, that's what we thought….god damn that is seriously irritating!"

_Should we tell Arnold to stop referring to them as a plural unit?_

"No."

"What's irritating?" Cecelia asked. "Is your face-"

"Liara got one look, screamed, and promptly passed out. And no, that's not what...the subject is. Basically, whenever...a singular pronoun would be used, the armor does something to our mouth so it comes out as the plural equivalent instead. It makes it sound like there's a serious mental condition at work in our brain."

I got fed up with the chatting and slammed my fist into the controls. "Goddamn it, will you all just leave me alone!?"

"Will you grow the fuck up? So you're ugly, big deal. So you've got another voice in your head- welcome to our world for several months. At least you have some idea what you're doing! we're just trying not to accidently kill ourselves somehow with this thing."

"Oh really", I cracked my neck, "Ty what's this?! Ty, why do you call yourself a User?! Ty, you really fucked up in your last adventure! Ty, How do I do this?! Ty, can I have this?! Ty, how does this work?! Ty, how did you fucking do that?! I'm sick of having to have every damn answer or you! Hannah has my memories, why don't you ask her next time you have a question?! I WANT TO BE ALONE!"

"Oh, yeah, because that's so helpful. Last I checked, you actually know what the fuck is going on with all this a hell of alot more than I do, so excuse me for being cautious and not jumping headfirst into things without looking! You're a goddamn billionaire and I can barely afford a set of clothes! You can just about change anything about anything by touching it, you're a bloody engineer on top of it, and you can make armors like you're a goddamn factory! All I've had to go on was knives and biotics I barely knew how to use! And while you got to have fun with friends, and get wasted, I nearly killed mine! Every time someone got close to me, I just painted a giant target on their back! And yet I've got to be stuck with you because we'll both die if we don't learn to pull the sticks out of asses and actually work together!...and thank you for finally turning off the venom speak Arnold."

"You think everything is about you, Bourne! I painted a target on their back?! Ha, we are all in the same boat! If you think that they got a target on their back because of you then you are stupider than you look! We are all targets! Nobody is special because they caught your eye!"

"I'm not talking about the bloody turian, I'm talking about the maniac that sliced my face practically in half!" His biotics flared around him, but instead of their normal blue, they were the same green as his eyes. "And if you think I _want _to be special, you're dead fucking wrong. I'd like nothing better to have never ended up in this position. But seeing as I'm stuck here, I've got a responsibility to see it through, and I'll be damned anyone get in my way- you especially!"

Pulling my fist back I followed through and slammed it into Bourne's chest and the blow sent him flying through the air to the opposite wall. "You think I am standing in your way?! I will be the first person to stand by you! I just want to be alone now! Am I not entitled to a minute without answering some question or manipulating some object!"

The way he glowed green was the only warning before he flew across the room into me, slamming me into a wall in return.

"You sure as hell haven't done much to help lately! You infected us with this bloody nanite shit, you just walked away after starting a fight that ended up with us stabbed in the leg, and that's after we saved your ungrateful ass from being crushed by a giant rock!" He pointed a finger at me in accusation. "So we suggest you get over yourself- "User." Because we don't care how powerful you are, you're still as mortal as the rest of us, and Saren and Iron both know it!"

I felt the red zero in my chest burn and I lost all my senses. "That's where you are wrong."

I lifted my hand up and the green aura that surrounded Bourne got brighter. Slowly he began to raise into the air disoriented. I waved my hand to the side and Bourne flew up against the wall.

"You want help!?" I slammed my fist into his chest, "I will give you help!"

His boot flew up and into my head, hard enough to make me slide back across the ground.

"If this is what you call help, I'd hate to see how you try to hurt us."

I got up and sprinted right at him diving right into his chest until I was fully absorbed into his body.

**Bourne:**

For a moment, I just looked down at where he'd disappeared. Then my head exploded in agony, and I fell to my knees as my own biotics faded, clutching at my head.

_*Bourne, what the hell just happened?!*_

_ )TY.(_

_ ^Fucking let go of these controls! You want help then let me give it to you!^_

_ )What I want is for you to get back out here and fight me like a man instead of hiding behind your powers like a coward!(_

I felt something snap in the back of my neck and I lost my balance, falling forward on my stomach. _^Dark channel unlocked. Flare, copied and unlocked. Biotic Sphere, added. An_y _other abilities that you want?^_

I suddenly felt something happening, in the center of my chest where he'd disappeared. The green portal reappeared, and he shot out of it, flying across the room. I somehow felt stronger too, like I had after he'd been taken down on Therum. I smiled. _)Looks like things just shifted back to me.(_

_ ^No, my powers just happened.^ _Ty stood up and put his hand on the wall. "Later."

With that, he just leaned into the glitch portal and vanished. I punched the wall angrily, and green energy exploded outward around me. _Great, Nova. Like that'll help right now._

_ ^Look, I'm not coming out for a while. I need to think and get my head straight. I unlocked Dark Channel, Flare, and Biotic Sphere. Have fun.^_

I shut him out angrily, and did the same to Hero, not wanting to hear anything from her either.

"What did he just do?" Shepard hadn't spoken the entire time and I almost forgot she was there.

"He said he "unlocked" new powers for us. Next time we see him, we think we're going to use him to test them out." I punched the wall, and left an imprint. "We just don't get it! First he throws us into a wall, then we hit him back, and now he's helping us and running?! Argh, why did we ever have to meet him?!"

Shepard crossed her arms. "I think he just needs a break. He asked me to leave him alone, I heard him ask Hannah to leave him alone, and he just blew up on you because you were the third strike."

I glared at where he'd disappeared, though I doubted she'd be able to tell. "Well he needs to learn to deal with his anger a little less destructively." I shook my head. That was the first time I'd let my anger go like that since..._Ever. It normally only happened when I was already in a fight, or if Iron was influencing me. _I looked down at "Arnold." _This stuff might really be like Venom…god I wish I had something else to compare this to._

_Bourne, can you hear us?_

I stopped short, completely tuning out Shepard's reply. _)Arnold?(_

_Do you know another voice in your head?  
)...well, actually-(_

_We know. More importantly, construction phase is complete._

_)Construction of what? I thought the armor was finished.(_

_Our consensus was not yet constructed. Luckily, we finally finished connecting to your hypothalamus gland._

_)Good. Maybe if I can ask someone other than Ty about this, he'll chill out for five minutes.(_

_ Do you know what the hypothalamus gland does?_

_ )Part of the brain that controls growth, isn't it?(_

_Yes, and it was causing you to produce mass amounts of testosterone as we connected to it._

_ )Huh. Any idea if Drew was doing that to Ty? It'd explain why we went all 'kong' on each other.(_

_ Yes, we are currently in sync with Drew. The outburst you both had is due to the over production. It caused you and Ty to experience a form of primal instinct that made you both compete for alpha male._

"Bourne, if you don't answer me in the next five seconds-"

I turned my attention back to Cecelia. "Do you mind, we're trying to have a conversation here."

_)I take it Drew's filling in Ty? Or did he block that out too?(_

_ Drew has had a tough time with Ty. He says that Ty has been experienced a change in cognitive thought processing since last connection._

I frowned. )_Once or twice, he's gone… really brutal. Red code streaming out of his face, and eyes going the same color as Saren's...could the partial merge have done something to him?(_

_ Possible, but this is different. Ty never doubted himself before on the level he is now. It has something to do with his pituitary gland activating when one of the ship's females are around._

_ )... he's doubting himself because he has a CRUSH?(_

_ Yes._

I leaned against the wall with a groan. _)Any idea who it's on?(_

_ Not even Drew know's who it is and he doubts Ty does. Most of his emotions are mixed with a dose of it. More than likely, Ty is doubting his control over the situation rather than his emotions themselves._

_ )Great, teenage drama. That's just the icing on the damn cake.(_

_You don't seem to understand. Ty never had his control over his universe questioned. It did lessen yes but he was able to push it forward. _

_)Whereas here, things can switch to me on a moment's notice and 'nerf' his powers instantly...I guess I can see where he's coming from.(_

_The pituitary gland part is where Ty is becoming complex. When he was in the last universe he developed an emotional attachment to Tali'zorah Nar Rayya. From that he lost more power. Now, he sees himself as a protector, a paladin if you will. To falter for one second would leave someone open to die. To weaken oneself by choice can lead to certain death._

_)But he said the attachment was the AI's way of trying to get a hold of him, so...I guess logic wouldn't exactly help him with that one.( _I turned it over in my mind, comparing and contrasting. _)It would explain a lot though. I had to limit myself so Iron couldn't escape, but if he limited himself, he took away half his powers.(_

_He does not need to limit himself. To limit himself for a selfish reason is something that is what he is truly questioning. Thank you for talking about this need to send our results to Drew for further comparison._

_)...did you seriously just use me as a rorschach test?!(_

_ No, Drew required flawed input on the current subject and asked us to collect data from you. We did not ask you what you saw. We gave you the data and let you come to a conclusion._

_ )Yeah, because that's so much better.( _I shook my head.

_ And yes, in response to your unanswered question, the male enhancement was a serious thing._

_ )...meh, not like I'll be getting any with a face like this anyway.(_

_ Update: scars at 40% healing rate._

_ )What did I say about not doing shit I didn't approve? The crimson scars, I can live with. Being pale as a vampire and having lines all over my face along with green eyes...I made someone pass out by looking at them for god's sake.(_

_ The scars are a weakness that needs to be patched. The paleness, veins, and eyes are a necessary side effect to brain enhancement._

I grimaced. _)Leave the scars. They're a good reminder of what can go wrong if I'm not careful. Same goes for my other scars.(_

_ These are all flaws that we wish to fix in this universe. Through our calculations, we have found that they will not follow you back into your original universe._

_ )Flawed how, aesthetics? None of them have any lasting effects, apart from a occasional minor twinge that's no different from having a stiff neck or stubbing my toe.(_

_ Aesthetics are important. They have practical uses from intimidation to courting rituals._

_ )You can't even see them in this armor anyway. And I was still more than able to get Ashley, even with the scars.(_

_ We are not long for this world. Certain patterns have become traceable. When we leave, all our modifications will stay. Are you positive?_

_ )Not for long?...you appeared when he's heading to Feros. Not a coincidence, is it?(_

_ We received a boost in our processing at exactly the same time difference from touching down on Feros as we did when we were created._

_ )So, on Virmire…(_

_ We do not know if you will survive our death._

_ )You're awfully chipper about it.( _I commented, trying to think it out. _Why would the AI give me something that would kill me? Danny said that its job was to make our task harder, not impossible. It saved me from Iron when that parasite would have overloaded my amp. Why give me another that would explode at a certain point?_

_ Must leave to process new data. Warning: A woman is yelling at you. _

I sighed. "Alright, you go do that." I turned to Cecelia, and I knew if she hadn't already injured herself punching Ty, she'd be trying to put me on the ground. "What did you want to talk about?"

"What the hell have you been doing for the last five minutes? I've been screaming at you, and you've been taking a nap!"

"Actually, we were talking with the suit, and what it's been doing to Ty. Also, it may or not explode in a few weeks, and since we don't have Ty's armor shifting powers, we wouldn't survive if that happened."

"What's wrong with Ty?" Cecelia had a tone of utter sarcasm as she asked.

"Did he show you his face? Because apparently, that's a result of having this thing fuse to the brain, and it caused...other side effects." If I told her Ty had a crush, I figured she'd just go tell him to get over it or something, which would have been rather counter productive. "For instance, a sudden desire to be the alpha male. Which is why we both ended up-" I pointed at the dents we'd left in the walls from being thrown into them.

"Wow, so you two had a contest to see who has the bigger dick." Cecelia laughed and turned to walk out the door. "I'm gonna go find the dumbass."

"We doubt you'll be able to. He teleported himself to somewhere hard to reach...and we doubt he's in the mood for company."

Cecelia waved me off and continued to walk out. "Too bad, I am going to need him once we land on Feros."

I started to follow her. _If she can break her hand hitting this thing, this could be the one time I don't have to worry about the consequences of pissing her off_. "Any idea who else you're bringing?"

"I have to bring Kaidan and Wrex on this one. That will give me a balanced team. You and Ty will be in team two with Ashley."

"We're taking multiple teams?" _Man it's annoying that that makes sense yet at the same time doesn't because it's different than than the game._

"Yeah, I figure there will be more Geth than one team can handle." Cecelia stepped into the elevator and I hit the button.

" Ash going to be in charge then?"

"Yes. But you may nominate someone other than yourself."

I grimaced behind my visor. While it was definitely better than having Ty in charge, I didn't really like the idea of taking orders from someone I should have outranked- especially an alternate version of my girlfriend. "To be frank, we'd be the only other person we would nominate. Tali and Liara don't have the experience, Garrus wouldn't work well with Ty, and he doesn't trust us, and...we're not even going to start with Flynn himself."

"Garrus actually worked well with Ty. They took down Ashley, Wrex, Kaidan and two other officers. You recommendation has been taken into consideration Bourne." Cecelia said with a devilish smile.

_In other words, she's going to put Garrus in charge now…I think. Why is that one of the few similarities has to be the inability to understand women? _

"How much of that was Ty though? We saw his glaive sticking out Wrex's back, not Garrus'." I paused. _Crap, why did I just give him praise? Argh, if she puts him in charge, I'm going to mutiny. _

Shepard leaned on the wall, "He did didn't he. But Garrus, he took down Ashley and Kaidan."

"Knowing how to fight isn't the same as knowing how to lead." Taking orders from Garrus would be even worse than Ashley. At least with her, I knew I could trust her. But there was a lot of lingering distrust of the turian, thanks to the experiences with my own version. _And no way she'd be fine with having three non alliance people in a group with Hannah in charge...also, I'm not sure it'd be a good idea anyway._

Shepard just looked away in a daze. She was thinking of something but I couldn't figure what it was. Maybe something from her past, but that was just a guess.

The elevator dinged and she stepped out, heading toward her cabin. I got the sense that following would be unwise. I sighed. _Not like there's anything for me up here. _I hit the elevator button to go back down. _Might as well see what the new upgrades are good for._

"Ty?!"

_)While I admit that's the last place I would have thought to look for you, it probably wasn't the smartest place to hide.(_

_ ^...^_

_ )Have fun with that.( _ I sent as the doors closed, and it began going down, taking me out of range.

_*Bourne, we need to talk.*_

_ )Can it wait?(_

Somehow, she managed to glare at me across the link.

_ )Fine, I'll be at the shooting range as soon as this thing gets down.(_

_ *I figured you'd head there at some point...by the way, did you put these dents in the walls, or was that Wrex?* _

_ )This technocyte stuff affected both our heads, and we...kinda tried to beat the shit out of each other. And then he unlocked Dark Channel, Flare, and Biotic Sphere for me, then apparently glitched to Cecelia's cabin to be alone.(_

_ *...that's the last place I would have thought to look, but she's going to be pissed.*_

_ )That's what I said.(_

_ ^Guys, Shepard is looking at me. I played dead and now she thinks I hit my head against the wall too hard.^_

_ )Should've thought ahead. Just wait for her to leave to get the doc or something, then glitch back out.(_

_ ^She is telling me something but I can't hear her.^_

_ *Why not? And I thought the range was more limited than this.*_

_ )We did just have our brains 'enhanced.'(_

_ ^I don't know, Drew says that he shut my ears down to stop me from hearing the verbal assault. He says that my thought process would be seriously hampered by it.^_

_ )...welp, good luck with that.( _I blocked him out abruptly, puzzle pieces connecting in my mind.

_*Well, he's not happy about that.*_

_ )Block him out too. Like you said, we need to talk...and trust me, this isn't something he should know.(_

After a moment, she replied. _*Alright, what's the problem?*_

_ )I think...I think he has a crush on Cecellia.(_

_ *...What?!*_

**(Well, this should be interesting...also, Hero said she refuses to show up for this one. Bourne said he'd show up if he had to, but he'd rather not. I saw him heading to his quarters with a crap ton of ryncol, so I think he just wants to get drunk. Or he's going to put it on his knives to poison them. Or both.)**

**^So, it's just you, me, Trebor and Spike. Layla won't leave her room after last time.^**

**(You were kinda, well...Gimme five!)**

**^Hells yeah! It's awesome.^**

**(Totally worth the way Hero keeps glaring at me and muttering about singularities in my coffee.)**

**T117: Someone let _you _near coffee?**

**(Decaf.)**

**S7: So, what was today's agenda?**

**T117:Uh...let's see...got one question for you via a PM. From Galisaa, "Is Is this new fic based on the original Users or the rewrite? And is Starspike still rewriting it?"**

**S7: Both, while the rewrite is taking a bit more of a detailed route it still is going to stick to the main events. As for the updates for it, I'm kinda driven by reviews and while I have been writing it 0 reviews = 0 motivation. On top of that, I had three midterms last week so I didn't get a chance.**

**T117: Also, I can say from experience that it is not very easy to redo something you've written.**

**S7: It's not exactly difficult as it is motivation. Well, it's difficult to gain the motivation for me to do it.**

**(Then you're not doing it right. Write cause you're having fun, not cause people are like "Hey, this is awesome, make more."...Well, you know, that's another good reason to want to, but if you can't have some fun with it...I mean, look at me. I'm a hoot to write for most of the time.)**

**S7: Dude, it is fun. But it's motivation to put the Xbox controller down and pick up a pen, so to speak.**

**T117: That's why I write for like chunks at a time. So it's like I'm writing on one tab, and have a youtube video in the other, and when I get an idea I pause the video and write for a bit, then if I get stuck I go back to the video and sorta let it stew. Or I pace around talking to myself until I come up with something.**

**(It's really creepy when he makes his voice all high pitched for Raptor or Hero.)**

**T117: I do not do that!**

**(Can't prove you don't.)**

**S7: Eh, whenever you talk about some line that Hero or Raptor says your voice does go higher.**

**(What's really creepy is it gets deeper for Cecelia's voice...and Ashley's.)**

**T117: You know, it's funny how you think you can't still get hurt even though the others aren't here.**

**S7: So, I hope that answers that question. Next!**

**T117:Not really seeing any questions...did we just want to talk about the process of writing this thing?**

**S7:Not really, our process is a bit more… weird. You know, like how instead of just writing this in turns we do it at the same time using Google Docs.**

**T117: That's because any semblance of a script is pretty much impossible considering how much of this is Bourne and Ty kinda bouncing off of and reacting to each other. **

**S7: Well, we do sorta have a script. We have the list of events that lead up to the end.**

**T117: That's more of an outline for the plot though. I mean that there's no real way to have like you write from Ty's POV and have Bourne react right, or Vise versa. I mean, we might be able to sorta guess at each others, but not very well.**

**S7: Yeah, the few times you tried you failed terribly.**

**^Yeah, you made me sound like Bourne trying to be funny. Just… like it was forced.^**

**(Bourne has had _some _funny lines...that and it's fun to watch him get hurt or made fun of and stuff.)**

**^Bourne is more of funny in a retort or wit. I'm funny because I am fun and having a good time.^**

**T117: And then there's the jokes that are too bad for him, that Iron ends up using instead because I still want to use them.**

**S7: Wow, looks like that's why he isn't funny.**

**(No, it's cause you're putting him next to Ty. He's the funny man to Raptor and Co, but compared to Ty, _Bourne's _the straight man.)**

**^How about you guys post the battle you wrote for Bourne and I? The one that started it all.^**

**T117: Meh. I dunno, why not.**

**S7: So, how about instead of an A/N next chapter we can post it then.**

**T117: Alright, why not.**

**(Maybe it'll shut everyone up about when he and Ty are going to fight.)**

**S7: Not really since we both have a better idea of what the other person can do. It's more of two people who just met arguing about their fictional characters and who would win.**

**T117: Yeah, I'd read Users, but as for how powerful Ty was...let's just say it took actually seeing/writing it for about 30 chapters for me to get a more accurate view of it.**

**(Course the whole "reality vs code" thing also complicates it.)**

**S7: True, then again, he had me limit Ty by only giving him one armor.**

**T117: Dude, I am not going to have this argument about who'd win out again. Cause I think we've discussed it about 15 times now at least.**

**S7: Yeah, but in the end you always agree that Ty would win in most cases.**

**T117: Most, not all.**

**(The trouble is figuring out how he could give Bourne comparable powers to Ty's code stuff.)**

**S7: Well, you kinda can't. One of the reasons I stuck with writing Users was because I had never read anything like it on . Ever. Granted since I finished it there have been a few that nearly matched it or seemed like it though I haven't kept up with them. There was The Programer, Uploaded, and I forgot the other one.**

**(No, I meant with the reality warping thing. The trouble is he'd either have to give Bourne a serious power boost for the crossover, or give him something and then nerf it for SaWoF so he wasn't just curbstomping everything in his path and being even more mary sue than he already is. Cause biotics might be good against some armors, but some are just too fast or tough for him to do anything with. And then there's other crap like the datapurge or that thing where he opens files, so on and so forth.)**

**^Just because someone has a ton of powers doesn't mean that that one is a Mary Sue. While I may have a ton of power, my struggles lie in emotional distress as the more I use my power and knowledge, the more people fear and despise me. I'm like Superman to Bourne's Batman!^**

**(I think Superman's like the definition of overpowered...Except for maybe Martian Manhunter, but not in the cartoon.)**

**^Well, maybe not Superman from most series. Superman from Justice League Unlimited. The one that actually took damage.^**

**(And then that epic finale moment where the other guy had to cheat cause he would've kicked his ass when he stopped holding back. Anyway, point is, reality warping and biotics don't mean much against someone who can do damn near anything.)**

**^Hey, it's fun to be powerful but I still wanna go home and be normal again.^**

**(Whereas Bourne wants to go back to fighting giant squid looking robots with a lady named after a dinosaur...how exactly am_ I _the insane one again?)**

**^You try to do something over and over without succeeding.^**

**(Like how you keep trying and failing to make people respect you?)**

**T117: Hey Iron, are you using your computer or your Ipad?**

**(Uh...Ipad cause it was closer. Why?)**

**T117: See that little blinking light?**

**(The red one?...you rigged it to explode for if the others weren't around to kick my ass.)**

**T117: Yep. Do I need to hit this little button right next to me, or are you going to shut up now?**

**S7: Damn, he's got you by the balls.**

**T117: No no, that little device is on his computer.**

**S7: Smartass.**

**(...What's the blast radius on this thing?)**

**T117: The motion sensor means once it's armed, you can't get away before it goes off.**

**(Crazy prepared much?)**

**S7: Can't you teleport?**

**(No...and even if I could, the over prepared bastard would probably have some sort of shielding up or something so I couldn't.)**

**T117: Not yet. Stuff's expensive- needs to wait till next pay day.**

**S7: Where do you work to get this pay?**

**(I dunno if you've noticed, but he's kinda paranoid about maintaining his anonymity. I mean, he won't even tell people his **Crazey metal has been logged off due to computer issues.

**T117: Whoops, finger slipped on the button.**

**S7: You do realize that most people have figured out your name by now?**

**T117:...Yeah, not really. Not that've noticed at least. **

**S7: Whatever, so next question is: Where is Cody?**

**^Hanging out with the aptly named Sir Notappearinginthisfilm.^**

Crazey metal has logged back in on another computer. **(Nice try T117. It was only a flesh wound.)**

**T117: Was it really, or did you just want to make your own Monty Python reference.**

**(No, you got me good, I just really like that movie.)**

**^Monty Python is awesome.^**

**(Ni! Ni!...also, T117, can you call an ambulance? And also the maid, cause I'm bleeding all over the place and I don't want to stain the carpets.)**

**S7: Holly shit, Iron just revealed he can be killed.**

**(...Uh...have you not played Mass Effect 2 yet?)**

**^Well, a psychopath like you, it seems like you wouldn't acknowledge that you can die.^**

**(Come on, I'm too funny to kill off for good. I'm practically an X-man!)**

**^Eh, **

**more of the Penguin from Batman. Lamest villain ever but you can't help but feel sorry for him.^**

**T117: Dude, there are way lamer villains, trust me.**

**S7: Yeah, but Iron thinks he is going to be god if he kills Bourne's body. The fuck?**

**(...It made sense at the time.)**

**^No, it didn't.^**

**(Do you really want to get into all the ways _your _story made no sense? Like the AI and all thatfalflgihaertgyhjklaghl;a sorry, passed out on the keyboard for a second.)**

**T117: Then why didn't you just hit backspace?**

**(I tried. Blood got in there and clogged it all uppppppppppp and now the ppppppp is sticking too. Great.)**

**^Haha, loser.^**

**T117: I could press this button and blow up the keyboard, see if that fixes the problem.**

**(...No thank you I'm good.)**

**S7: Alright, well better check the reviews and see if we have any more questions... Okay, Spartan007xxx, the fuck?**

**T117: Yeah, I don't know what he means either...unless he was suggesting Bourne should've picked Raptor as a name for Arnold, which'd just be idiotic.**

**S7: I meant what he was saying about the work. Does he think that I am a very miniscule part of this? Is he implying that there are definite differences between the quality of your sections and mine? Is he assuming that I put no work into this chapter? Is he saying that he hates reading Ty's parts?**

**(If he is, fuck him. He's a compppppplete moron with no idea how this whole ppppprocess works. I mean, you don't think T117 managed to come up with all this on his own, do you?)**

**T117: For once, what Iron said. But without the lisppppppp.**

**S7: Seriously, it's like, if you have a problem then speak it out. If you are not going to comment then why the fuck would you insinuate that it is or wanted to be though of in negative nature? By saying no comment it means that you don't have constructive criticism but that you just hate me as a person and are using the golden rule as a psychological insult. Criticism isn't a bad thing, it helps me get better. But from what I can discern from your comment, you just don't like me as a person.**

**(Which is understan...nevermind. Seriously, how many of these expppppplosives do you have?)**

**T117: Look, I'm willing to take like 55 percent of the credit, but that other 45 percent is his.**

**(45 pppppppercent? What makes you think you should get the extra five instead of a fifty-fifty spppppppplit?)**

**T117:Fanbase, grammar/spelling corrections, and ego.**

**S7: You know, I would argue that it should be 50/50 but I honestly doubt anyone here would believe my reasons for it being that way.**

**T117: Eh, I was mostly kidding anyway. 51-49 at max for those reasons. **

**(You really are an egotistical bastard, aren't you.)**

**T117: I don't know- let's see what the button thinks.**

**(I take it back I take it back I take it back!...even if it's true.)**

**S7: I think we better go now since this author's note has gone on way too long. Sayonara!**

**T117:...Dude, **not **cool. (I'm _not _doing the nerd sign off.)**

**^Then make Iron do it.^**

**T117: Just how sick and evil do you think I am?**

**(...Do you really want an answer to that?)**

**S7: Just say it so we can go.**

**T117: I'm just going to go old school. Adios. **


	21. It Would be Better if she were my Sister

**Tali:**

Tali couldn't help but grin as she walked towards the elevator. Thanks to the bet she'd placed on Ty, she was now several thousand credits richer. And she remembered seeing a state of the art omni-tool on display when she and Wrex were on the Citadel last.

She got to the elevator to call it, but saw that it was already on its way down. She leaned against the wall to wait for it.

_I wonder what he's been up to. I haven't seen him since he carried Hannah off- I haven't seen her or Bourne either for that matter. Or really anyone from the ground crew. _She happened to glance at the floor, and saw a red stain on it. After a moment, she realized it was blood, and wondered what happened.

She shrugged as she heard the elevator slide to a stop, and stood in front of it, waiting for the doors to open.

When they did, her hand immediately flew to her pistol.

The creature that was in there sighed. "Why is that always the reaction to this thing?"

"Bourne?" She asked in surprise, recognizing the voice. She took in the knives on the arms, and the omega on the chest, but it looked nothing like his normal armor. "What is that?"

"Let's just say Ty's nanites had a little...bug in the system." He shrugged. "So both our armors morphed into...this."  
Tali's eyes fell down to his chest and noticed that all of his features were easily definable. Tali felt herself blush and she changed the subject, "So, what's it feel like?"

He looked at her for a moment in surprise- or at least she thought it was. His normal pokerface was still more expressive than the reflective grey visor covering his face. "Well...Ty compared to some old commercial from Earth's 21st century. Not really sure how to describe it." He looked down at his arms. "We guess it's like a second skin made of metal, or something."

"Um, don't you mean 'I guess?'"

"Uh, yeah, right, what...was the word that was used?"

She gave him a look of confusion.

He sighed. "Look, don't spread it around, but the short version is that this armor is a symbiotic organism. So "I" becomes "we" when referring to... ourself."

Tali cocked her head to the isde. "That's okay, not like it hampers your productivity."

"No, it's just a mild irritation. Along with a few other minor side effects."

"So, where are you headed?"

"Down to the shooting range. Hannah's supposed to meet us there." He gestured to himself. "And we're less likely to run into people down there. We've had 3 people point a gun at us on sight already…not including you reaching for yours."

Tali rubbed the back of her head and forced herself to ask him a question. "Can I come with you? I could really use some help sighting in my new shotgun?"

He was silent for a moment, and without being able to so much as see his eyes, she had no idea what he was thinking. "Yeah, we can help you with that." He finally said, walking past her towards the range.

She tried to keep her eyes on his back, but they kept dropping lower, to where the armor was especially form fitting. She felt her cheeks redden every time she had to yank her eyes back up.

"Bourne?" Tali heard Hannah call from the inside of the shooting range.

She looked past him to see that the door was open, and apparently she could see his armor from that angle.

"Yeah, that's kinda the reaction we've been getting today.'

Tali reached back and grabbed out her shotgun and checked it for the range. "Well, what do you suggest I start with for an enemy?"

Bourne walked into the room, and over to the controls. "Probably going to have to deal with Geth more than anything. Good a place to start as any."

"Start with something a little lighter though." Hannah suggested, walking over to stand next to him. "Aim is more important that-"

"Nobody likes a side seat driver Hero, even in this day and age."

Tali hit the Geth button on the setting but turned it down to trooper. "There, all ready."

Bourne glanced at her, then back at Hannah. "Yeah yeah, you can stop giving us that look."

"We'll watch from here." She said to Tali.

The program activated and Geth began moving in attack patterns. Tali placed the closest Geth in her crosshairs and fired. The geth directly to its left dropped from the spray.

"Is that the one you were aiming for?" Bourne asked. "Maybe it's just an optical illusion, but-"

Her eyes felt the ground and all that she felt was embarrassment. "No."

"Where were you aiming?"

"The closest one to me."

There was a short pause. "Try adjusting the sights a little to the right."

Tali activated her omni-tool and began working on the sights when her audio receptors picked up a quiet conversation between Hannah and Bourne.

"Is there a reason you used my real name a moment ago?"

"The stupid conversion thing for the suit. Arnold's working on it, but it's also blocking you out."

"I noticed. That's why I had to say it aloud."

"Sorry, what do you want us to say? At least it was because of that and not just us not paying attention."

"Right, so when do we go over the real topic for this meeting?"

There was a pause, and Tali felt eyes on her back.

"Would you be able to hear us from here?"

"Doubtful." Bourne replied. "Basically, what Arnold and Drew ended up figuring out is Ty's doubting himself more due to something with his pituitary gland- whenever an unknown person is nearby."

"And you really think that that's Cecelia?"

Tali had to work to not turn around in surprise.

"Hero, not five minutes after she pointed a gun at his head, he 'called dibs.' Not to mention calling her "probably the hottest alliance official this side of the galaxy." And saying that 'the dominatrix look' wasn't sexy. We could go on with examples."

"Would you not? It's really disturbing to hear her talked about that way...did you really find a video of her-"

"Yes, but it wasn't on purpose."

"Uh huh. Sure."

Tali felt her face going to a burning red and she fired her shotgun to help tune them out. Sadly, it wasn't enough as she heard them continue talking.

"So the reason he threw you into the wall hard enough to leave a dent was...because he has a crush?"

"No, that was the excess testosterone this thing generated. The crush is what's making him doubt himself...that, and us."

"You?"

"Back in his own universe...Arnold said he never doubted that he could control his universe. But with us here, and things shifting from code to reality on the flip of a coin…"

They both went silent, leaving Tali confused beyond any words she knew.

"Yeah, it's not a good thing."

"You seem to have picked up his talent for understatement."

"It's bad enough we have to deal with Saren and Iron-" Tali felt a twinge of pain in her gut as she heard the name, but it passed a moment later. "-but if he's going all Emo the whole time…"

"I get the picture."

That was more than Tali could say.

"And on top of that, this thing's apparently on a time limit."

"What do you mean?"

"It appeared at the exact same time- the exact same split second- that it did when Ty did this the first time. So if you follow that logic-"

"It'll disappear on Virmire?"

Tali could swear she'd heard that name before, though she couldn't place it.

"Apparently...and without Ty's abilities, there's no guarantee we'll survive it's 'death'."

"...how are you holding up? That's a lot to take in."

"Well, when we opened the faceplate earlier, Liara took one look, screamed, and passed out."

"..."

"Yeah, as of 2 hours ago, Wrex is no longer the ugliest person on the Normandy." He joked, though it sounded slightly forced.

Tali let out a curse as her gun suddenly overheated, and one of the Geth "killed" her with a well placed shot to the gut. Apparently, it was loud enough for the two biotics to hear.

"Any improvement?" Bourne asked.

"Yes and no. the new aiming system is throwing me off when it comes to seeing other enemies that I am not aiming at."

She heard faint footsteps and a moment later Hannah was standing next to her. "Mind if I take a look?"

"Sure", Tali said as she handed the gun up to her.

"Bourne, start this thing up again."

After a moment, Geth appeared, and she took aim. After firing a couple of shots, she lowered the gun and let them tag her to end it. "Yeah, I see what you mean. You get plenty of accuracy, but the flipside is that it completely takes away your peripheral vision."

She turned around to her friend. "Bourne, what do you think?"

Tali turned as well, and saw a blue tear at the wall. Ty stepped out of it, smoking. "Bourne, you will never believe the bull shit conclusion that Drew says he has come to. Oh, Hero and Tali are here… Nevermind."

"After what's happened to us today, we'd believe just about anything…unless he said you're turning into a batarian, or that gravity is about to stop working. Anything less extreme than that."

Tali noticed that the red zero that was usually on his chest had migrated up to where his left eye was. "Nevermind, I don't want to talk about it."

Bourne crossed his arms and tilted his head to the side, apparently glaring at him. "For the record, bringing a subject up only to not talk about is kinda a pet peeve of ours."

Ty remained quiet and stood up straighter to try and show no fear of Bourne. Bourne seemed almost amused by the act.

"Anyway-" Hannah turned back to looking at the shotgun. "It looks like the problem here is that it takes too much focus to be that accurate, but I don't think the shotgun itself can be modified to improve it without destroying it."

Tali half listened to Hannah drone on about how to improve her skills with new shotgun but she was more interested in the way Ty was making his way over to Bourne.

"Dude, I have a serious problem." Ty said under his breath.

Bourne glanced back at them, and she instantly turned towards Hannah, hoping to appear to not be listening.

"If you're talking about the mind link being down, she and us are having the same problem- Arnold's working on something else, so it's affecting the rest of our brain too."

Ty smacked him in the shoulder, "This is my problem. Having you two stopped from being able to whisper in my ear at anytime isn't it. I actually am enjoying having my thoughts to myself. Anyway, Drew says that two women on the ship are causing my pituitary gland to act up and I don't think you are going to like who it is."

"He says two of them...that's odd. Arnold was apparently talking to him not long ago, but they thought it was a singular female."

Ty nodded, "Yes, Drew said he thought it was one also. But apparently after what happened with Cecelia. He thinks it's two now."

"And if displeasure at the thought is a part of it, Ashley must be one of the two."

"Worse."

"That seems doubtful...god, please say you're not talking about Hero."

"... uh, how about that space weather, huh?"

"Your skills are lying are pitiful." From the corner of her eye, Tali saw him cover his faceplate with his hands. "Christ, words cannot describe how insanely creepy that is. Seriously, that's just...We don't even...honestly, there is a strong temptation right now to put a bullet in your head, and then turn it on ourself."

Ty looked down dejectedly and shrugged. "I don't know. Not like I have the emotional control you do. On top of what my brain does, this armor apparently amplifies it and we end up feeling super emotions."

"Emotional control we do? You're kidding, right? A poker face doesn't mean that the one with it doesn't still experience emotions, often strong ones. It just means that training and habit have made it possible to hide it with very little effort."

Ty cracked his neck and made his way for the door. "I am heading to the mess hall. I seriously need to eat."

"Yeah, guess it would be a good idea to head there too before long. At least with two of us, it might seem less abnormal. Though the chances of that are admittedly slim."

Shaking his head Ty said., "Okay, but look away from me when you eat. I don't want to throw up what I already ate."

"You are slightly less ugly, but still not easy to look at, so your worry is unnecessary." He turned to look at Tali, and she almost jumped as she turned back to Hannah, hoping he wouldn't realize she'd been eavesdropping. "Hero, can you handle this?"

"I think so, yeah."

"Alright, Ty and us are heading to the mess."

"After I'm done with this, I'll head that way myself."

"Might not be a good idea...well, not sitting at the same table anyway. Unless you like having your half eaten meal periodically covered with the partially digested other half."

"Yeah. Maybe we can just look away from each other while we talk."

"Maybe." He said with a shrug, heading out the door a few feet behind Ty.

Hannah must have given Tali a hundred pieces of advice, but she didn't hear a single one of them. Her attention was focused on what the three had been discussing- though she understood almost none of it.

"Tali? Is something wrong?" Hannah asked when they stopped to adjust the gun again. "You seem a little out of it."

"I… I think I just heard Ty say he has… affection for you."

"...what?"

**Shepard:**

Cecelia led out of Chakwas out her room, fuming that Ty literally played dead to escape her wrath. _Or should I say, put it off until next I see him. _She just had to work out how to get past his armor.

"You gonna eat that?"

"Being a biotic, it would be a safe assumption for you to make that the answer is yes."

Cecelia looked to her left and saw Ty and Bourne eating at the table. "You son-of-a-bitch."

Ty immediately grabbed his hamburger off the table and snatched Bourne's as well, Sprinting as fast as he could away.

He got about 3 feet before slamming into a green wall of energy that appeared in front of him. "If you wish to get away from her, you will put the burger back. Unless you want her to have help with the violence she's no doubt about to inflict on you."

Cecelia took two steps toward Ty but he threw Bourne's burger like a frisbee at her and she got distracted as the biotic snatched it out of the air.

She looked up from the act and Ty was nowhere to be found. "Oh, he's good."

"Being able to teleport tends to help if you're trying to get away." Bourne said, faceplate closed.

Cecelia sighed and took a seat across from him. "Man, has he been worse than usual or is it just me?"

He nodded. "It's something to do with this... tecnocyte armor we're both encased in. Apparently it amplifies emotions- a lot."

"So what? He is more annoying than usual? And why was there puke in my room?"

"Didn't you find him in there earlier? He probably looked in the mirror."

"No, it was when it was locked. Someone told me they heard both you in their and Ty sounded like he was in pain… it was Kaidan that told me."

He was silent for a moment. "Okay, truth is Ty accidentally teleported us in there when he was trying to get somewhere else, and...he accidently took a knee to the groin."

"Accidentally?"

"Very little warning was given. He should have...made two separate trips instead of sending us both at once."

Shepard cocked her head to the side. "You know how to do his teleport thing?"

"Not remotely. He should have opened a portal...but not had us go through at the same time. He would have been the second trip, and given time to move so he wouldn't land in the same spot...assuming that was actually possible, but either way it wasn't his smartest move."

Raising an eyebrow she said, "So, you get how it works?"

"As was said before, not remotely. It's just a guess." He brought his hands together in front of him, setting them on the table. "If you wish to continue this conversation, moving to a place where you aren't looking directly at this spot would be a good idea."

She looked at him in confusion a moment, before remembering what he'd said Liara had done when she'd seen his face. She got up and moved to the spot two seats next to him, keeping her attention on the back wall as his faceplate opened back up.

"Apparently, this thing would be able to heal the facial scars, but not change the eyes back to normal or get rid of the black veins crawling all over the face." He commented. "Hardly an improvement in and of itself."

Shepard nodded, "Yeah, so you think Ty is going to get himself under control or should I just lock you two in a room and give you a steel baseball bat?"

"Hopefully, that won't be necessary. But quite honestly, restrainment might be the only way to keep him from a repeat of our earlier encounter. Personally, with the...since there's no other accurate word, infection will have to suffice. With the infection complete, brain patterns should be normal. And while he doesn't have the training or skill to hide his emotions, the risk for...having to have that happen to a certain biotic is extremely unlikely."

"Huh?"

He sighed. "With the whole 'singular converts to plural' thing, efforts are being made to avoid such pronouns. But if further clarification is necessary for you to understand...we can deal with it for one conversation, though we won't really like it. Basically, we're better at controlling ourselves than Ty is."  
Ty suddenly fell out of the ceiling and landed in the seat across from Bourne. "I'm back...argh, dude, close that thing up, will you?"

"Or you can just move. Already had to stop eating when she sat down, not doing it again for you."

Ty began speaking without noticing Shepard. "I don't know why but I was getting a weird look from Hannah. Do you think she heard us earlier?"

"Not at that distance. Even with enhanced hearing- which she does not have- we'd have been barely more than a faint buzzing."

Ty looked to Shepard and then back to Bourne. "Well it was weird. Now, I am going to stop talking about this since she is here."

He grunted assent as he continued eating.

The adept sat down next to Cecelia. "Hey Ty...I'm really not sure how to say this…"

"Generally, using your mouth is advised." Bourne commented, earning himself a glare.

"I have to leave", Ty said as he got up and began walking away- instead walking face first into a green wall for the second time. "God damn you Jason. Fuck, I think that messed with my head. Ah, damn it."

"You are aware that you already have symbiotic alien nanotechnology doing that? And to be fair, Hero's way of dealing with you seems like it'll be more interesting than Cecelia's." He sounded distinctly amused.

"Fine Hannah, ask away. After all, if you ask Bourne, I am the man with all the answers."

"...I have no idea what that means, but I'll have him fill me in later. Okay, no easy way to say this, so...there's a rumor on the lower deck that you have a thing for me."

Bourne's faceplate closed, and he turned to look at her with what could have only been suprise. "Where'd you hear that?"

Cecelia felt a pang of jealousy run through her gut and she looked at Ty's faceplate. "Do tell Ty."

Ty waved them off. "Ha, no way. Why the hell would I fight you if I had a thing for you? That is like going in the opposite direction, don't you think?"

"Well, you did carry her off in your arms bridal style." Bourne said with a chuckle, obviously enjoying this. Though there was a hint of something else that Shepard couldn't place.

Ty shook his head, "Out of respect. She gave a good fight, therefore, I should be the one that makes sure she is okay."

"So if you'd fought...damn it, that's taking way more effort than we thought it would. If you'd fought us, would you have carried us bridal style? And can we get an opinion here on whether this sounds better than us going out of our way to avoid pronouns and sounding like something from shakespeare?"

"Honestly, with you Bourne, I would have dragged you like I would a deer out of the forest. In other words, tie you to a four wheeler and drag you out."

"Where would you have gotten a four wheeler on the Normandy?...What about Garrus or...we don't know, Cecelia maybe? If they'd given you a fight like that, would you have carried them out like her, or like a deer?"

Ty cocked his head at Bourne, confused. "Bridal, that's how I was always taught to carry a woman. Guys, you just toss over your shoulder or drag on the ground."

Bourne shrugged and turned back to his food, face plate sliding open again. "So why does the turian get tossed over the shoulder instead being tied to a vehicle you have no chance of actually getting on this ship? What, would you have used the Mako?"  
"Because the Turian isn't part metal."

"And if you hadn't given us both this stuff, you would have?...also, he would have been wearing armor, so how is that different? Either way the weight would have been the same." He pointed a thumb at Hannah. "Hell, with the cybernetics she has, she's probably the heaviest of the three of us."

"And why exactly do you think calling a woman heavy is a good thing?" She asked in response, shooting him a death glare.

"Blame gravity, not me."

Ty leaned back and crossed his arms. "What's next? Are you going to tell her she looks fat in a dress?"

"We said she weighed more, not that she was fat- hell, thanks to the biotics she couldn't be much thinner. Stating scientific fact is far different than deliberately trying to get a bullet between the eyes. "

Cecelia leaned in and gave Ty her death glare. "So, yes you do like Hannah or No, you don't?"

"No." Ty answered flatly so she couldn't get a read on whether it was a lie or not.

Bourne chuckled. "So, have any ladies around here caught your eye? Because according the suit, a couple of them have."

"No, and what does a suit of armor really know?"

"A suit of armor, not much. A highly advanced artificial intelligence on the other hand, who's able to see brain patterns, heart rate, breathing, the chemical changes in your body, that's a totally different thing...and it just occurred to us that with the whole 'AI are illegal to make' thing, probably should be careful where we talk about this stuff."

"It knows nothing. Now, shut up."

Cecelia grinned as she leaned forward. "Really? Sounds to me like you're just unwilling to admit it."

"You know, I have to agree with her on this one." Hannah said, leaning back in her seat and putting her hands behind her head. "And it sounds pretty qualified to judge you."

"It learned how to recognize sarcasm and metaphors from speech patterns." Bourne put in. "So odds are it can figure out something like a crush too."

"I highly doubt that. You can't code something to read emotions that have no chemical existence. A crush, is developed by a sexual attraction to someone that you believe you are compatible with. Now, for the record, no one here is compatable with me. They would just slow me down and nerf my powers."

Cecelia heard his faceplate close, and glanced over to see him looking at both women. "Totally in denial, are we right or are we right?"

"Jason, I totally agree with you, but honestly I think I prefered the shakespeare method." Hannah answered.

"They are in the center of the table. I can't look at you all without looking at them." Ty pointed out, obviously annoyed.

"...huh?" Both biotics asked at once.

"God, does it matter right now? I mean seriously, not like Hannah, Cecelia, Ashley, Tali, or Liara are going to find my face attractive in this state." Ty said running his hand down the helmet.

Bourne chuckled. "Don't be such a pessimist...maybe one of them will go blind. And deaf."

Ty stopped talking after that and laid his head down on the table. At first, Cecelia thought it was just out of annoyance but after several seconds she heard something. _He's snoring?_

"Well, I guess he finally ran out of juice." She commented.

Chakwas overheard her and walked over to Ty. "What do you expect? He has been up since his fight with Hannah. Never saw him rest his eyes a wink while he waited for her to wake up."  
Bourne put his hand on his chin thoughtfully. "Not to mention how much energy he must have used in that fight. Or the one in the cargo hold with Garrus. Or taking out his frustrations on the shooting range and me...also, he accidently got kneed in the crotch at one point."

Ty rolled his head over and muttered. "Yeah, I can be the hero. You can be the maiden in distress."

Bourne swore under his breath."Why doesn't this suit have a built in camera or audio recording device or...wait, seriously, it does?...was it on just now?...hehe, nice. So using that later."

"Layla, stop it. No, I can't let them go… No, even my rage needs to stay." Ty began to roll is his sleep until he fell to the ground. "No, stop it. Don't take them. My emotions, my soul. It hurts."

Bourne almost seemed to flow over to where he was, he moved so quickly and quietly. "Arnold, any idea what he's talking about? And did you fix that one issue so we can stop talking out loud now, or are we going to continue to sound insane?"

"Stop it." Ty's hand dug into the floor and nanites poured out from his fingers.

Cecelia looked over at Hannah, who had gone wide eyed. "What's going on?"

"We'll tell you as soon as we know." Bourne answered grimly. "In the meantime-" green biotics surrounded him and Ty, and the latter lifted into the air. "We better get him away from anything important so he doesn't screw up anything else...come on Arnold, you know we don't mean it like that...no,we don't…okay, maybe there's a _little _bit of resentment, but that's more directed at him, since it's his fault while you...Oh come on, can you think of a better word than infection?"

Both women exchanged a look.

"Just figure out what's wrong with him- And hurry up with the mental link thing!"

**Bourne:**

I tried to tune out the looks the others were given me. "Look, last time he had a nightmare like this, it ended up almost killing him. And that was before his emotions were being jacked up a thousand fold. So see if Drew can do something to wake him up."

_Jason, Drew is requesting that I let you know that he finds that you are the central cause for Ty's nightmare._

I considered that for a moment. "It sounded more like his ex was the cause...ask him if it could be-" I stopped myself short as I caught Hannah looking at me. "Our doppelganger from the place that gave us amnesia."

_This dream is not related to him. It seems that the more time you spend away from him, the more Ty can push it out of his mind. This dream has Layla trying to get him to let go of his emotions to kill you._

"...Well, that wasn't what we expected." I shook my head. "Clarify one thing for us though. The worry about the person in question lessens the more time he's away from us, or from the doppelganger?"

_The one with the designation Iron._

I glanced over at the others and lowered my voice to a barely audible level. "So he's more afraid of us than of him?"

_Drew says that Ty believes that if you were given a choice of killing him or staying here...You wouldn't hesitate to take him out._

"You mean, he thinks we'd kill him to go back." It wasn't a question. "The place we came from before this, or the place we came from originally?"

_The universe with a Raptor._

"...you know that she's a person, not a dinosaur, right?"

_Really, I thought that you modded your world to have dinosaurs. _

I decided to ignore that- partially because it was really hard to detect sarcasm in a voice that sounded so filtered and reptilian. And because I couldn't really blame Ty for thinking so. Danny had told us we had to 'win' to go back. And if that meant taking him out...I might hesitate, but if it was the only way to get back..._If it was the only way to see Ashley and Raptor again, I _would _kill him. Even if I hesitated first, I'd still kill him- or maybe die trying, with what he can do._

"Hannah, get out of my way." Ty's words were cold and held an unspoken note of "Or else." It was a tone I was very familiar with.

"What's going on in there now?" I asked, slightly louder than I'd been speaking.

_Ty's drive to win and belief that you would trade his life for your last led him to let go of his emotions. He has become pure consciousness in a body and is tearing you apart bit by bit. He does not want to die and more than that, he does not want to lose._

I felt a chill go down my spine. "Did...did it happen to his real mind?"

_No, Ty's dreams are more indepth than ones that you might have. Because he is part code and User, his dreams consist of possible events and what would be the most likely outcome to them._

"Like what...happened when we were in a coma after being stabbed?"

_Not quite. You were only shown future events, apart from facing…Iron, in combat. He is _living _such future events._

I lowered my voice again. "How likely are such events to happen? He's not actually predicting the future, right?"

_One cannot say without some idea of the story plan. Ty is just feeding off a worst case scenario. You both could end up leaving without having to battle each other._

I certainly hoped that would be the case. Unless things were completely on my side, he'd tear me apart- _Literally. He could beat Hero without armor morphing or anything but the biotic catching. He couldn't stop my charges, or maybe my knives, but it'd be an even match at best. _ I noticed that the red matrix code still surround his hands, though my biotics were for the most part holding it in place. "What's he trying to do with the code?"

"Hero, please move." He muttered.

"And what's happening in the dream now?"

_Hero is between you and him. She is forcing the emotions he discarded to come back._

"And the code? What would that be doing if it was touching something?"

_You don't want to know. Oh, and to keep himself alive, he just killed Hero._

I grimaced beneath the visor. "Let us guess- that code would be destroying anything it touched. And it might even be seeking us out specifically...that, or it would be turning us into a chick or something."

"What was that?" Hannah asked.

I shot her a look that would have said to be quiet if she'd seen it. "Nothing. It's just a really weird dream." I turned back to the floating User, voice barely audible. "Like we said before, what we want is rarely what we need. What'd it be doing?"

_It would tear you apart and make sure you felt all the pain._

"Just us?...yeah, that's actually not as bad as we feared."

_Anyone who touches it. We were using a collective you. _

"Ah...That is as bad. Any idea how much longer before he wakes up, or stops with the code? And somewhat relevant, is it doing anything to our biotics, and how long can we keep this up before we run out of energy?"

_No, you can get him in a pod. But we suggest you do it fast. You are going very slow and wearing out your body._

I turned to the pods, and he turned with me, as if connected by an invisible pole. "How will putting him in something he'll destroy help? And what do you mean I'm going slow?"

_You are slowing in your actions. The sway could be in Ty's favor currently._

"We feel fine….other than having you in our head."

_ It can still be slightly in his favor. Not all the way but it is leaning toward him. Now, do not worry about the format strike. It only affects things with active code, not inanimate code._

I started walking towards the pods, and held a hand up to forestall the questions the others were starting to ask. "So, then, do the biotics count as active code? Because we'd hate to lose any important powers...other than biotic sphere. That one, we don't get the point of, since we already can make shields and tend to go in alone instead of hanging back."

_Ty gave you that with the intention that you would use it as a warp bubble. All enemies that step in it would automatically be warped._

"So how the heck do we stop it from warping our allies too? Game and reality aren't the same thing...not always, anyway."  
_The biotic bubble is part biotics and part tech. That's why the Asari justicars in the multiplayer have octogonal plates that make up the shield._

"...You know, we always wondered about that." I carefully moved Ty out of the way as I opened a pod, then moved myself out of the way as I lowered him in,without letting him actually make contact with anything. "You sure this is a good idea?"

_Doubt is not the most healthy start to a relationship. _

"Half the voices we've had in our head tried to kill us, and _every _synthetic we've met other you than have been shooting at us or trying to blow us up. Cut us a little slack."

_I have no rope to lengthen._

Again, I ignored the possible sarcasm. "Also, we still get absolutely nothing about this code stuff, other than it usually seems to help him and simultaneously screw us over."

_Ty has been mulling over teaching you some simple methods of controlling it. So that next time he doesn't get his knowledge erased._

"Knowledge erased?"

_Picking his nose._

"...we thought he said we were _trying _to do that. You mean to tell us he now lacks the hand eye coordination to...that doesn't seem physically possible."

_It's true, he just didn't want to let you know because you were trying to save him. He thought it would hurt your feelings to know you deleted some of his basic instinctive motor skills._

"...with nose picking, I'm more likely to crack up. What else got erased?"

_His fourth grade year._

That stopped me cold. "Why didn't he...I'm probably the one person who would understand that."

_He repieced it together easily. Just because something is deleted, doesn't mean it's gone with code. Formatting is a different story though._

I looked at Ty again. _Here goes nothing. _I deactivated the biotics, and he fell the half centimeter or so into the pod. After a moment, I let out the breath I'd been holding.

_While I understand your doubt under the circumstances, it's hard not to take it personally._

"Noted. What's the difference between deletion and reformating though?

I looked at Ty and noticed the glow around his fist was gone. _Deletion is the act of enabling your computer to overwrite save storage space. Formatting is to clear that space of everything. It appears Ty has switched dreams._

"So you're saying, if something gets formatted, it's gone for good?...just to be clear, which one happened to the nose picking thing?"

_Deletion. Would you like updates on Ty's dream?_

"Only if it's relevant to us, Hannah, or the Normandy crew."

_ Hannah._

"Will hearing about his dream give me nightmares or creep me out?"

_He is seeing the most likely scenario if he were to tell her how he feels._

"...unless she's flat out saying no way, then it's probably better you don't tell us...and is there a way to stop overriding the singulars?"  
_She says no and he is somewhat crushed but okay. As for the singulars, I like people knowing that there's two people in here._

"If we have to talk to civilians on Feros, we'll sound insane. And how come Drew seems to have stopped doing that for Ty?"

_Ty scares us._

"...Well, that's just fantastic."

"Bourne, if you're done talking to yourself, you mind telling us what the hell just happened?" From the tone of Cecelia's voice, it was not a request.

I turned to face them, arms crossed. "His AI talked to ours. He's fine now. Anything more than that-" I hit the button to open a pod. "Can wait until tomorrow. We've been up even longer than he has, genetic enhancements or not."  
I heard her yelling as I shut the pod. "We'll pay for that later, but right now we're too tired to care. Arnold, you don't need sleep, right?"

_Correct._

"Keep an eye on Ty. And if he wakes up, wake us up." Something else occurred to me. "And up the speed and strength increases a little. If things go south, we want any advantages we can get."

_Do you still want it done gradually?_

"If you kept it on overnight, would we reach our maximum limits?"

_Negative._

"About what would our maximum be?"

_With our armor, similar to a Spartan-2. Without, you'd just barely break human records._

"Then boost us up once we're asleep...just remind us when we wake up so we don't break the pod opening it, or crush someone's shoulder by accident or something…though if Wrex pisses us off-" I smiled grimly. "Then this might be fun."

**^Can't I just rage quit now? I am not enjoying this game.^**

**(It gets better later on. Which means worse for Bourne. *Spoiler alert- he explodes.)**

**^Wait, aren't you like the spoiler cops usually?^**

**(...Bourne's always getting blown up or stabbed or something though. It's like saying "There's kryptonite in *insert anything with superman here*" and calling that a spoiler. Or saying "Batman will angst over his dead parents.")**

**)Or saying a Michael Bay film will have giant explosions.(**

***Or saying Bourne is going to kick Iron's ass.***

**(Yeah, exact- hey!)**

**^Go away Hero.^**

**(Yeah, I wish. But since _somebody _blew up my I-pad and made me bleed all over my keyboard and ruin it, I have to use her spare. Which she won't let me do unless she's also here.)**

**^Damn it, now this is just awkward. Can she at least just not speak?^**

***Or you could just not be a dick.***

**^I'm not being a dick, I am having a bad day.^**

**(Oh no, a girl is talking to you...yeah, guess that would be pretty uncommon for you, huh?)**

***How about instead of arguing, T117 and S7 post that original fight like they said they would, and then we don't have to deal with each other.***

**S7: I don't know. Forcing you two to talk this out with Iron as the middle man could be funnier.**

***Do you really think that, or do you just not want to have to go back and find the original fight in all those PMs?***

**(Also, if you try to make me do it, I think it's perfectly in character to break this computer with Hero's computer.)**

**)You realize that'd be pretty much best case scenario for both of us, right?(**

**^That is best case scenario for everyone.^**

**T117: Yeah, gotta veto that. Iron's the most fun to write for, since Bourne's basically me but exaggerated in certain areas, and Hero's basically a snarky goody-two-shoes. Iron's...well...**

**S7: Damn, okay, I'll go sifting through the PMs.**

**^Jesus Christ that is a ton of PMs.^**

**T117: Yeah, no kidding...Alright, I just copied and pasted the original stuff, and put our names on which sections we did. And Also deleted stuff not related to the fight, like when we were talking about getting together to play ME3 or random stuff…And also fixed some grammar errors and stuff.**

**(What are you trying to do, build up suspense? Let's go!)**

S7: Hero is dead, Iron is dead, you stated that Raptor would most likely be tagging along. Ahh, we need rules for this pissing 

T117: One on one, Jason Vs Ty.

S7: Maybe I should just ask my readers what they would think. Lol, jk. they probably would be on your side anyway

T117: Bourne's no mary sue (anymore) but he's definitely one tough mofo to try to kill.

S7: And Ty get's his Technocyte armor. The battle takes place on Noveria. on the cliff highway because it is a badass place for a battle.

T117: Bourne is how he is at the end of Siawof, no Iron or Hero, but he can still charge and has singularities, plus his own skills.

S7: Ty has the glaive, Drew, Tsunami assault rifle, katana Shotgun, Stiletto Pistol, and Naginata sniper (sure he can't use it but it looks cool on his back) and no friends

T117: Alright , Bourne has his Assault rifle, Shotgun, and pistol with explosive rounds. And the knives. obviously.

S7: Just the technocyte one (Glaive) can be controlled by Drew. that means it's Ty's equivalent to the biotic knives. Jason get's first move because Ty doesn't strike first

T117:Alright.

Bourne biotically throws a couple of knives from his belt at Ty, just to test the waters.

He's also got a barrier up for extra protection.

S7: Ty would just spawn his drone and let it take the knives in the face. Leaving him okay.

T117: Or wide open to a warp field, which'd be the next thing Bourne hurled his way.

S7: Ty would just use Shield boost that way his shields could take the warp. Then, he would rip out his stiletto pistol in his right hand and his glaive in his left. He would then being making his way toward Bourne and lay suppression with his pistol.

T117: Bourne whips out his own pistol and opens fire, letting his barrier absorb Ty's.

He also flicks a knife into his left hand, for if he gets close.

S7: Ty would let Drew take over at this point because he is a fast paced fighter. Drew would dodge the shots and toss the glaive as Borne's left hand to keep him from having the knife.

T117: Bourne drops the knife to biotically deflect the glaive, then follows it up by launching the dropped knife at Ty/Drew.

S7: Ty brings up his right arm and straight takes the blow. Then uses the metal in the knife along with the iron in his bloodstream to make a second glaive. With that he gets in close and takes a swing at Bourne

T117: He biotically charges into him, then charges backwards to give himself room. He then throws out a singularity.

S7: Ty recovers and throws his drone out as a decoy for the singularity. After, he fires off a overload and sabotage at Borne to disable his weapons and biotics while he get's in close

T117:...You mean disable his barrier, right? Because Sabotage only affects weapons.

S7: Yes, that, I have no idea why I wrote power

T117:Bourne throws a warp field at the glaive and a throw orb at him to knock him back.

S7: Ty throws off his second glaive and calls the other glaive between him and the throw blocking it. Now, he pulls his Katana out and shoots a blast right at Borne's center

T117: His shields are half depleted. With nothing between them, he hits Ty with a biotic charge, focused in a punch right to the gut, then rips the shotgun from his hands and crushes it.

S7: Ty bends over in pain from the punch but moves quick as Jason crushes his gun. Ty throws his hand right into the main core of Jason's operating system and begins shutting down his powers. 

T117: The data rewriting causes Bourne to lose some of his training with guns and his basic throw. His own powers kick in, trying to get things back to normal, and both are thrown back several feet.

He takes advantage and hits Ty with another charge.

S7: Ty hits a wall and a red zero lights up on his chest. the red zero duplicates and flows out of him causing their most hated enemy to rise between them. Saren spawns out of the red matrix code and stands between the two of them.

T117: Seeing the more urgent threat, Bourne hurls a half dozen knives at his head.

S7: Ty begins to stand up and watches as Saren transforms his robotic arm into the arm of the werehog and snatches all Bourne's knives out of the air and then hurls them at Ty. Ty quickly rolls to the side and dodges the knives. 

T117:Bourne's weapons are finally cooled enough to use, so he whips out his shotgun and opens fire.

S7: Saren uses Kai Leng's arm shield to stop it, and throws a biotic blast Bourne charges to the side to avoid. Saren uses his biotics to make an ice spear from the snow and hurls it at Ty but Ty already moved. Ty ran over to one of his glaives that had an active warp field on it and kicked it in the air. Drew took over from there and directed it at Saren. Saren saw it coming and brought up a brute arm to defend himself but the glaive embedded into it and caused the warp field to form onto him.

T117: Seeing this, Bourne throws in a biotic orb, causing the primed combo to detonate, blowing his arm off.

S7: Saren drops to one knee clutching his arm and looked down at the ground. He saw and picked up Ty's glaive and pressed it to his stump of an arm. Using the glaive he regrew his arm and morphed it into a buster cannon aimed at Jason. Ty seeing that Saren was distracted plunged his arm down into the snow and began constructing a new glaive from the metals in the mountain.

T117: Bourne charges to the side, narrowly avoiding the blast, and sends a tightly packed group of knives at Saren's head.

S7: Ty pulls his hand out of the snow with another glaive and calls the one he used to block Jason's throw back to his hand. He quickly took in the action and saw his chance. Ty began sprinting toward Saren and threw both his Glaives at Borne. While Bourne was distracted Ty slammed his arm into Saren and quickly began reabsorbing his data.

T117: Bourne charges out of the way of the Glaives, and slams into Ty with a second one. He puts his shotgun at the base of Ty's skull, but Saren takes the opportunity to throw a grenade at both of them, knocking them both back several feet.

S7: Ty jumps up out of the snow and has Drew call the glances back to him. Once they are in his hands Ty converts them into pure data and readies his ultimate power.

T117:Bourne grabs biotically and floats him in front of him for a shield. He starts throwing knives at Ty, using the biotics to curve them around Saren.

S7: Formatting input has started. Jason's knives burst into ones and zeroes as they hit Ty. Ty immediately sprints forward and punches Saren blasting him back into red binary code. "One chance dude!"

T117:The timing for Saren's death is wrong, causing Bourne's reality warping to kick in. As it attempts to push things back to normal, it weakens Ty's ability to manipulate code.

One of the knives manages to get through, stabbing him in the side.

S7:The knife causes Ty to release all of his pent up energy and total format occurs. Everything and everyone is deleted. Total reset in progress.

Okay, I ended it. It's a draw

T117:That, or Bourne's powers would have thanks to Saren. He's supposed to have died, but not died at that time or place. So he needs to be brought back, but he needs to stay dead. Paradox causes a rift in reality, completely wipes out everything.

**(...Draw? Man, what a f**king copout.)**

**^BULLSHIT!^**

**~It's like you didn't even try.~**

**S7: To be fair, I had to limit Ty for this. Without Drew, Ty would have owned.**

**T117: If you want to bitch about that, how about we just say Bourne's reality warping did something to give him the best possible chance...plus, Bourne got a couple new abilities last chapter, which'd give him a better chance.**

**(Do not have this same damn pissing match literally twice in a row!)**

***Instead of whining about who got screwed over in the fight, how about you focus on the positives, like how it expanded into such a great story...or at least decent story.***

**(Decent?)**

***It has you in it. I say that makes decent a generous description.***

**(...There's no need to be hurtful.)**

**S7: True, this pissing watch comes up a lot when we talk though.**

**T117: That's because we're both major nerds.**

**S7: I think everyone got that when they read our fan fiction.**

**T117: Anyway, I think that wraps up this chapter.**

**S7: Yep, please leave any comments, questions and concerns in the box below unless they are about how we should stop writing this. Seriously, you are about two months late on that.**

**T117: Yeah, and we're finishing this damn thing if it kills us...though I hope it doesn't, since I want to also complete Surviving a World of Fiction. Anyway, Sayonara.**

**S7:1473I2**


	22. Worst Day Ever- Of All Time

**Ty:**

I woke up and felt the stiffness of sleep leave my body. Yesterday had been so eventful it was just exhausting. It felt good to just lay awake in the bed.

_Ty, I have noticed your brain patterns have changed. Are you awake?_

"Yeah, I am. What do you need bro?"

_Arnold said that Bourne requested to be awakened when you wake. Shall I alert him?_

I thought for a moment, "Am I the only one awake?"

_No, Joker, some engineers, and one of the ground crew did not sleep. _

"Then don't alert him. I need a break from having all the answers."

_He is currently in the mess hall eating breakfast. He will know you are awake regardless when the pod opens._

"Son of a bitch, is there a glitch around that I can't see?"

_There is one right behind you. Warning: it only leads to the shooting range._

"Fine by me", I focused on my back and felt the glitch take hold. After a quick trip through the glitch tube, I landed right in front of my locker. "Well, that's lucky."

_ Alert: Awakened ground crew is near you._

"Who the hell is it at this hour?" I looked at my omni-tool and saw that it was 3:00 am standard Earth time.

_It would seem that Hero was unable to sleep. Or, possibly, was asked by Bourne to keep an eye out for you. _

"Son of a bitch… again. Anywhere I can hide?"

_Upper left corner has adequate shadow for hiding. Chances of being found rest at forty percent._

I took Drew's option and stuck my glaive in the ceiling and held onto it. It took a bit but I squeezed into the corner and managed to hide. Immediately following my maneuver the door opened.

Hero stepped inside and I held onto the glaive for dear life. I needed some time to myself and that meant no girls allowed.

She yawned as she walked over to the lockers, and started putting her gear away, almost directly below me. She had just finished storing her weapons when she moved to her armor. I looked away as best I could, although, the testosterone in me said opposite and held a very compelling argument.

Somewhat to my disappointment, she was wearing jeans and a t-shirt underneath the armor, so there wasn't much to see. Then, due to the redistribution to my weight, the glaive came a little loose and moved an inch downward.

"You know, you might want to just get down from there before you fall and hurt yourself." She commented without looking up.

"Fuuuu-" The glaive gave way and I ended up landing right behind her followed by the glaive landing in between my legs. "-uuuck."

"Let me guess- you're trying to get some alone time?" She asked, as if I hadn't just fallen off the ceiling and nearly castrated myself.

"Bingo", I grunted.

"Yeah, good luck finding that on this ship. Though if anyone asks, I can say you snuck off on to the Citadel. Might buy you an hour or two."

"You would do that for me? Wait, we are still docked?"

That got her to turn around to face me. "Trust me, I know that feeling when everybody wants something from you and you can't get a minute to yourself. It's half the reason why I couldn't keep a fish alive for more than a day...but yeah, we're leaving in about 6 hours, so if you actually do want to sneak off to the Citadel, keep an eye on the time."

I sat up and grabbed my glaive. "Thanks for the info. So has the rumor past yet?"

"Well...there wasn't really one to start with...Apparently, Tali overheard you and Bourne talking, and…" She rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly.

Keeping a casual tone, I stood up giving my reply. "Well, Drew says that you apparently inspire that feeling out of me but don't worry. I'm not stupid enough to follow it."

"...Uh, thanks, I think?"

I stepped over to my locker and began grabbing out my stuff. "Yeah, I have been in this situation before. I say I like you. You don't return the feelings and I try to say that we could make it work. You would say you still have a connection to Thane and there is now a chance to have that again. I say well why don't we just see where this goes for now. You say that you would never do that. I walk away sad and you get to stay in one place knowing that I have a broken heart but at least I will get over it."

"Not even close. It's more...well...you literally ripped me out of Jason's head. That's just weird for everyone involved. And while you and Bourne can make fun of me for it all you want, Thane was and always will be my only true love." She crossed her arms. "And to be brutally honest, I'm wondering if you only are into me because I remind you of someone else."

_Scenario 43, the chances for that one were slim._

"Look, from what Tali said, you had something for two women on the ship. It wouldn't be Ashley, or you would have tried to hide that from Bourne. It's unlikely to be Liara or Tali, since the former was just a friend back in your world, and your relationship with Tali wasn't a good one. And since I doubt you're into older women, Chakwas is also out." She crossed her arms. "Which leaves me, and the crazy version of me."

"That's the other thing, I don't know what's going on. I don't want a relationship but at the same time I feel like I have know one that really get me."

She shrugged. "At least you're not the only one on the ship." She chuckled. "After all, Wrex and Cecelia are pretty much trigger happy lunatics, and you've got two other people who have voices in their head...plus, the crew actually believes in the reapers, without the same proof that we have."

"I don't see how any of this helps me."

She tilted her head to the side. "As you reminded Bourne yesterday, I have at least most of your memories."

"Not of when I let go of my emotions, when I became more powerful than anything. Hero, when I let go and did, I became ruthless. I wouldn't hesitate to kill you. I wouldn't hesitate to destroy this whole world and move on. I didn't just cut when I was in Saren's head. I cut when I became a monster." I finished grabbing my gear and stored it on my person. "Well, looks like that's it. I'm off to tear up the Citadel and see what kind of trouble I can get in."

She put a hand on my shoulder as I turned away. "For it's worth, I'm sorry about what I said before...plenty of people have looked into that abyss- but not as many have crawled out after we fell in."

I shrugged her hand off. "Hero, I'm the one person that can get over anything and that abyss was nothing to me to get out of. I am", I gave her my smile, even though she couldn't see it through my visor, "the User."

"As I recall, you said something back on Eden Prime about how even Kevin Flynn needed help." A wall of purple energy appeared a few feet in front of me,though unlike with Bourne there was enough room that I didn't walk straight into it. "And like it or not, you can't do this alone. Even if you do 99.999 percent of the work, there's still that last bit you can't do. Only Cecelia can kill Saren, and Bourne's reality warping is the best advantage against his code powers. Just a little something to keep in mind." The wall disappeared before I could reply, and I heard her walking towards the elevators.

_You seem to have been dissed and left._

"Shut up Drew." Within two seconds of saying that, Bourne walked into the shooting range and that little bit of alone time was all I got. "Look, it's Buzz Killington."

He paused for a moment. "Is it sad that the one thing we have in common seems to be the fact we pretend to kill things for a hobby in our spare time?...yes Arnold, we realize that was the point of Halo, this is different because it's a hell of alot more realistic...and is there a reason you didn't tell us he was awake?" He cocked his head to the side, apparently listening. "Then why didn't you say you'd have to ask Drew for permission yesterday when we asked?!"

"Huh, well, since you are here. Want me to teach you how to do some mediocre code manipulation so that you don't take anymore of my skills away?"

He crossed his arms. "Well, something occurred to us when we saw Hero just now on the elevator. If she knows most everything you do...why hasn't she used any of it? She's yet to point out any glitches, or anything like that." He shrugged. "As you're so fond of saying, you're the only User here. It may not be something you can teach. Not like we can teach you how to bend reality...yes Arnold, we think the two things are different...okay, so they're different ways to do the same thing. Doesn't mean the methods themselves are related."

I put my hand against a locker and focused on it's color, then I focused on making it pink and it was done. "There, all you have to do it imagine it in steps and whalla. It's done."

He reached for the locker, and then stopped. "Arnold, when you ramped up the strength...no, we're just being cautious...you said Spartan-2, and we're well aware of what one of those can do...Really? Really? You just took it there?!" He shook his head. "Does this thing not come with a mute button?"

"Arnold, shut it...now." I kept my voice steady and focused. "Bourne, put your hand on the locker and close your eyes. You should start to see the locker on a background of matrix code."

He put his hand on the locker, seeming to be extra gentle. "Just out of curiosity, how exactly would you be able to tell whether or not my eyes were closed?"

"Look, if you don't do it, I am going to take Hero's Locust and get Danny to mod it instead of standing here with you."

"Sorry, sorry. It's the stupid amplification thing. Makes you emotional, makes me even more of a smartass than usual. Alright, let's see what I can do."

"The amplification phase ended while we were sleeping. You are just being an ass." I wasn't in the mood for him being a smart ass and was trying to make the best of a bad situation.

He didn't reply, and seemed to be focusing solely on the locker. However, nothing at all seemed to be happening.

"Focus on the method, not the result. Picture the new color falling like a curtain over the locker and it becoming that color."

"We can't even see the damn locker. All we can see is- believe it or not- our eyelids."

I crossed my arms. "How did you do it before when you deleted my memories?"

He pulled his hand off the locker angrily. "We don't know, alright? All we remember is some serious pain along the arms where the nanites were, and more pain at the back of the skull. All we saw was the same red code everyone else could see, nothing like what you're talking about."

I walked up and put my hand on his head. With one read I skimmed his code file and found that his ability to manipulate code was behind a pain barrier. The information just made me sneer at the results.

"You put up a pain barrier between you and your ability to manipulate code."

"We did, or the AI did to make it so we couldn't?" He asked, shaking his head. "Look, it's not the pain that's stopping us. We're no stranger to it. The issue might be...look, the sad truth is, we were kinda obsessed with this game. Maybe it's easier for our brain to perceive it as reality than code, and that's the block? The AI could just hide it under the pain block or something. Powerful as you are, it's not outside the realm of possibility- especially since its entire goal is to make this as hard as possible."

I leaned against the wall, "Yeah, you're probably right. I'm gonna head to the Citadel and see what kind of trouble I can get in… Maybe see if I can find a girl that I can chill with and have no emotional attachment to. One that isn't an alternate reality version of another I like."

I grabbed my stuff and began walking to the door.

"...dude, did you just say you have a crush on Cecelia? Wait, don't answer that, we don't want to know." I heard him opening his own locker. "We're going to go try out the new powers you unlocked, and test out Arnold's upgrades a bit. Just make sure you don't get left behind when we leave, alright? Because while that would be somewhat humorous, it'd also be a pain in the ass."

"Yeah, oh I also forgot to tell you that out of all the different ways that Hero could tell me there was no way she would give me the time of day. It was senario 43, the least likely. Which was surprising since I never made a move on her."

There was a momentary silence, before he was right next to me. "Wait, how exactly did a rumor get her to do that? So far as we're aware, you've only admitted it once- to us."

"A little quarian told her. Little eavesdropping bitch just knows how to ruin my life."

"Eavesdropping? How could...she have...heard us...oh son of a bitch."

It took me a second to pick up what he was thinking but once I got it, it hit me like a sack of potatoes. "You don't think… Nah, she couldn't possibly comprehend what we were saying."

"It's not just that. Before you walked in, Hero and us were talking. And we specifically mentioned...different universes. She wouldn't recognize Iron's name, but we might have hinted at Saren's powers." He put his head in his hands. "How did we screw up that much? We just assumed that she wouldn't be able to hear instead of waiting five minutes to talk." He angrily punched the wall, and his arm went in up to the elbow. "...Damn Arnold, you went all out with the upgrades." He tried to pull his arm out, but apparently was stuck, judging by the way he was yanking at it.

"Something wrong?"

His arm started glowing green, and the wall bent outwards, allowing him to easily pull his hand out. "Not in regards to that." He turned back to me. "But…we also mentioned that 'the mind link' was down, which was why we were talking aloud. If that's one of the things Tali heard...that shouldn't be too hard to explain, but if it gets to Cecelia, she'll want to know why we didn't tell her. And if the universe thing gets to her, she might just throw all three of in the brig for sounding like a bunch of lunatics- or LARPers, which'd probably be just as bad in her mind."

"Don't worry, I'm sure she would keep it to herself. She cares more about what others think of her than the good of the crew right now." I replied waving him off. "Oh, and before I forget, hand me Hannah's Locust."

"What, you can't walk the three extra feet to get it yourself?" He commented as he headed for the shooting range. Despite that, he popped open her locker and tossed me the gun. "Do us a favor though- if you have Danny modify that as we assume you're going to- make a couple spares."

"No thanks Bourne, I don't think I will be helping you." Out of the corner of my eye I saw Danny step out from the wall. "How's it going bitches?"

**Bourne:**

I turned to look at Danny, arms crossed. "Well, let us put it this way-" I tilted my head up slightly, and there was a faint hiss as my faceplate opened. He made the mistake of looking over, and I saw his face turn faintly green. I tilted my head forward slightly, and it slid closed again. "And not only does this suit make make us look like shit, it apparently is going to explode- with yours truly inside of it...huh, wondered if that'd get past the conversion process."

_There was no accurate equivalent…am I allowed to talk again, or does Ty's order to shut up still apply?_

"We don't see how it's his call to make when it's our head...so long as next time we tell you to shut up, you shut up."

_I do not recall any instances when you have done so._

"Shut up."

_...as you would put it, touche. _

I shook my head. "Please tell us you're bringing good news?... Scratch that, a lack of bad news would be enough to make the day better."

Danny crossed his arms. "I bring news. You're the one that decides if it is good or bad."

I sighed. "Not the answer we were hoping for, but could be worse...damnit, you'd think we'd know better by now than to jinx us."

"Yeah, so Ty, remember the terrorsome trio that we had to fight in our adventure?"

I would have facepalmed if the visor was open and I didn't want to fracture my own face with my new strength.

_Safeguards are in place so you would not do so._

"Arnold, shut up." I said, emulating Ty's tone from earlier.

_That's not going to work. You aren't Ty._

I grit my teeth, but stayed silent. At the very least he was better than Iron.

Ty smacked me in the back of the head- though it felt closer to a fly landing on me- and I could feel his scorn through the empty faceplate. "Will you shut up. Yes, I do remember them. Samus was a total bitch."

"In order- No Ty, we won't shut up, and while we hope we're wrong, it's logical to assume that you're bringing them up because they're here as well...or someone else just as bad is."

"Arnold, you make him shut up. Cut functionality to vocal cords… or else. Now, what's going on with the trio?"

I opened my mouth, but despite moving my lips, nothing happened. I angrily punched the wall again, deciding to wait until his guard was down to get him back.

"They aren't coming back", Danny's tone was a bit too chipper for comfort.

I made a questioning gesture, knowing there had to be more than that. Neither of them seemed to pick up on it though, and I felt like a bad mime.

"That's one hell of a relief", Ty gestured for him to go on, "But?"

Danny took the Locust from Ty and I saw it begin to morph in his hands. "But, there is a chance that Saren could make new ones. Luckily, though, the AI set up a stop on your way to Feros to sell your nanites story. Smart thinking by the way. People rarely question you when you say that you have tiny little robots running around in your brain."

I got a thought, and brought up my omni-tool, typing quickly. "They're more likely to believe that than the actual truth." The synthesized voice said.

"Okay, as long as you stop cutting in before I can actually ask a relevant question. Arnold, restore his vocal cords… and drop the we thing. It was funny until this morning."

I barely managed to stop a sigh of relief at those words. "Deal."

"Now, what should we expect on this?"

Danny handed the gun back to Ty and shrugged. "I don't know, just be ready for it."

I glanced at Ty, but he didn't seem to be about to ask anything. "You said that Saren could code new characters, right? Any idea if he'd be able to do something with Iron's powers- unlock new abilities or shit like that?"

"Nothing like that, Saren doesn't have a piece of Ty's armor this time to start corrupting his code with. So, he will only be able to port in new characters and do some of the simple things that Ty does."

I frowned under my helmet. "From what Doctor Michel said, it sounded like he's basically Ty at max strength." _And if he can port in anyone/anything, then we have all sorts of unknowns here…man, now I'm kinda wishing I hadn't rented the Alien Vs Predators game that one time. _

Ty grabbed Danny by the shoulders. "Limitations for it. Now."

"It is limited to what you both played on your 360s. He can't access the internet as easily this time." Danny turned around and began leaving. "Now, my time is up. The AI said I can't talk to you until Feros so I will catch you laters."

In my mind, it was the same scenario I'd found myself in when Ty had first morphed his armor into Master Chief's: I had no idea what exactly could be brought out, but considering some of the powerhouses in video games, I doubted it'd be anything good.

_That is a logical assumption._

"Fuck off Arnold, I'm not in the mood for your bullshit."

Ty turned to the door and began walking the same way Danny did. "Sounds like Arnold is giving you a hard time."

"Well, at least he hasn't tried to kill me like the last guy I had in my head. Yet."

_Is that modifier really necessary?  
_"Considering that you're apparently going to explode on Virmire and blow me to hell, yes. Yes it is."

Ty stepped out the door and was finally gone.

I considered sending him a message to ask where he'd be on the Citadel, in case I wanted to go there myself without risking running into him, but I turned back to the range instead.

"Alright Arnold, if you're ready to actually help, let's see what these new powers can do."

I walked the short distance to the range, and brought up the program options. _I'd tear right through Geth, so lets go for something tougher...Hmm, Blood Pack. Lots of Krogan, and Vorcha. Shreddable for target practice, and tougher guys to test how effective things are. _I pulled my assault rifle over my shoulder as I hit the start. _That'll work. _

The environment changed around me, until it became what looked like the slums of Omega. _Hmm, urban, but not a lot of cover. Then again, I don't plan on hiding much. _

A trio of Vorcha rounded a corner, followed by a pair of Krogan. I smiled, and raised my hand. I wasn't really sure how to throw out Dark Channel, but I figured it was similar to warp, just without throwing it as an orb.

I pulled my hand back, and thrust it forward. My biotics were still green as they flared around me, as was the cloud of energy that hit the nearer Krogan in the gut.

I slid behind cover as friends instantly opened fire. _Okay, that one works. Time for the next one. _I stood up and spread my arms out like a scarecrow. Instantly, the biotic sphere appeared around me, and though a few shots hit me, between the sphere and my barrier, it just bounced off my armor by the time it hit. _Now, to test the warping thing- _I raised my hand in front of me, and one of the Vorcha started glowing blue. I yanked it down and behind me, and he flew the short distance towards me. For a split second as he entered the barrier, I saw the familiar pattern of warp covering him. Then it reacted with the energy field that had brought him in, and he exploded beyond hope of regeneration.

_Two down, one to go. _I thought as I ducked down behind cover again. I slid a knife into hand, using it to see over my hiding place. When they stopped firing to let their guns cool, I threw it at the Krogan I'd Dark Channeled, sending a warp field along with it. The explosion left only the second Krogan alive, and he struggled to get to his feet.

As he stood up, I sent a warp field at him and it began eating away at his armor.

But this time, I had no idea how to actually activate the power in question- Flare was nothing like my other abilities. "Uh, Arnold? How do I actually use Flare?"

_Ty used a motion like a baseball pitch to activate it. Logic points to using the same method for the same results._

I pulled my hand back like I was getting ready to throw something, and imagined my biotics condensing into something I could throw. The sensation was different, and I smiled, figuring that that was exactly what I wanted. "Batter up!" I hurled it at the warped Krogan as he charged, and the result was an explosion that left me blinded for several seconds. When I was able to see again, there was no sign of any of the gang. Suddenly, a new Krogan rounded the corner, and I raised my arms. But when I tried to activate my powers, nothing happened. The only result was that his concussive shot caught me in the chest and launched me clean out of the biotic sphere and into a wall. I fell to the ground, dazed. I grunted as I got to my feet, which was apparently enough of a question for Arnold to understand.

_Using Flare requires the majority of the energy you can muster. Although you recover quickly, it will still make it impossible to use other powers afterwards for about ten seconds._

I looked up at the Krogan, eyes blazing. "How long has it been?"

_You still have a few seconds. _

I rolled to cover as the Krogan fired a carnage shot at me. "This guys time just ran out." I vaulted over the cover and sprinted at him.

_Powers will return in three...two…_

"One." I punched him with everything I could muster, and added my biotics to it. He was sent clean through a nearby wall.

_I believe the term for that is overkill. _

I smiled as the simulation faded. "Yes, yes it is. And I like it that way."

Suddenly, the door to the room opened and Cecelia peaked through. "Good, you are here. Ty went to the Citadel and caught up to me. Anyway, straight to the point, he is chasing down some people I used to run in a gang with and he is losing blood fast."

I looked at her, than at the simulation room. "He hasn't even been gone for 10 minutes, how did he manage that? Never mind." I answered my own question. "What do you need from me?"

"I need your help catching up. You can do that biotic charge thing and Ty is car hopping trying to catch them. He has a communicator and a tracer on him so we can meet up with him."

_When'd he get that? _I wondered, but didn't ask since there wasn't enough time. "Even if the Normandy elevator got upgraded, the ones on the Citadel are too slow." I headed for the door. "Are the Cargo Bay doors opened right now?"

She nodded. "We're resupplying. Why?"

"Then we have a shortcut. C'mon." I sprinted through the doors in that direction. It was a few seconds before I realized I'd left her in the dust. "Man Arnold, when you upgrade, you upgrade."

_It would be more efficient to carry her there rather than wait for her. Also, Drew has sent a message. Ty has exceeded the amount of blood one can lose and still function properly._

I growled a few choice profanities under my breath and hit the comm. "Shepard, just got a message from Ty's suit AI. He's lost too much blood to function properly...I'm going to have to go after him without you. You'd only slow me down."

_Given her previous reactions when Ty has gone solo, that may not be the wisest thing to say to her. _

I cut the com feed with her before she could reply. "Rather beg forgiveness than ask permission in a case like this."

"Hey, Bourne, you there?" I heard Ty's call come from in my helmet.

"If you weren't bleeding out, I'd be asking what the hell happened. As is, you can tell me over a beer later." I rounded the corner and looked at the open bay doors. "Where are you right now?"

"In the Presidium. They tried to pull a drive by but I managed to get Shepard to cover and then jump on one of their passing vehicles. Don't ask me how, Drew did it. Now, I have sealed off their exits so all they can do is fly in circles around the Presidium."

"Any chance you can open a glitch from there to the cargo bay? It'd be a lot faster than what I'm planning."

"I'm on top of a motherfucking car! There is no possible way for me to pull you to here. The glitches only interconnect as long as they are part of the same structure! Fuck!"

"I thought you'd gotten off the car." I muttered. "Alright, just don't die until I get there." I sprinted at the open doors, thankful that the only person present wasn't in my way. I jumped, and used my biotics to slow myself down as I fell several stories to a different walkway. I landed with a faint thud and sprinted towards the doorway at the end. "Arnold, I need the quickest way to where Ty's at."

_Analyzing Citadel Structure...there is a rental car facility on the way. _

"Since I don't have enough for a deposit, I'm guessing you're talking about a little grand theft auto?"

_Did you figure that out yourself?_

I rounded the corner, and saw that the offices- and therefore the keys- were behind a set of solid metal doors.

I stopped in front of them, thinking. "Warp and throw?"

_It may be better to save energy so you can stop the aircar. You can simply tear through this wall._

I smiled. "Sometimes I like the way you think." I thrust my hands forward, and true to what he'd said, they went right through. I gripped the edges of the hole and yanked it open until the space was big enough to squeeze my torso through. I looked around the office, and saw a wall of keys. I pulled one to me at random with my biotics, and turned to the lot- which had at least 6 dozen cars.

"Any idea to tell which car this belongs to?"

Something suddenly was pressed against the back of my head. "You can ask the judge when you meet him. Turn around very slowly, and put your hands on your head." _C-sec. Fan-tuckin-fastic._

"Worst day ever!" Ty shouted through our comm.

"Of all time." I agreed.

"I said, turn around." The officer insisted.

I complied, and saw that there were two of them, one Turian and the other a human. It was the human who had a pistol pointed directly at my head.

"Open the faceplate." The Turian ordered, reaching for his own gun.

_The shock from seeing your face might startle them enough to give you an edge, but it may also cause him to fire his weapon on instinct._

I grit my teeth, wishing they'd picked somewhere else to be. _Hope they get good health coverage._ My hand flew up to the humans wrist, yanking it to the side. I heard something snap as everything below the elbow twisted with it. I gave him a shot to the gut, more carefully this time, and he fell the ground, gasping for air.

The turian's gun was aimed at me quickly, but I just threw him into a wall biotically. His head hit it hard, and he slumped to the ground. I hoped he was only knocked out, but I couldn't take the time to check." Arnold, any idea which car to take?"

_It would seem they left the engine running in their squad car._

I turned, and saw that he was right. It was parked right at the edge of the lot._ "_Good. Sirens will get people out of the way."

_I would suggest you hurry. Ty has an hour left before collapse._

"Good thing I won't have to obey the speed limit then." I commented as I got in, filing away what he'd said to ask about later. "Let's see what this thing can do."

I floored it, and flew backwards into one of the cars in the lot. "It can do reverse. Good to know."

_Alert: I have sent a backup of my self to Drew incase of death by crash._

"Funny AI." I muttered sarcastically as I threw it into drive. "Just be glad I'm driving instead of Raptor."

_True. Likelihood of crashing is only 81%, as opposed to 97%._

"Don't tempt me." I chuckled we lifted off. "Let's go save that idiot before I change my mind."

**(I hope he changes his mind.)**

**^You are such an ass. Why the hell are we getting coffee when you say shit like that?^**

**)Oh you have no sense of humor.(**

***Also, am the only one that thinks it's a bad idea to give all these guys caffeine?***

**^Do you think we should mention that we hijacked that plane to get here?^**

**~Where the hell are you?~**

**^Disney World.^**

***So, T117 said he was staying at home cause he was _this _close to getting Blood Pack mastery...but I'm starting to think he's just smarter than he looks.***

**^So, what you are saying is that he looks stupid.^**

***Well, if Bourne and Iron are supposed to look like him-***

**(Go to hell.) )Hardy Har har.(**

**^So, Iron, do you wanna go scare little kids at the Tower of Terror or sneak into the Small World ride and change the song so that they are singing 'User' by Disturbed?^**

**(How about we go hijack a couple of the mickey mouse costumes or something and just wreak havoc in those?)**

**^Dibs on the Beast costume.^**

**(Oh yeah, forgot Disney owns Marvel now...Dibs on being a Jedi!)**

***I already called dibs on the flight over here.***

**(Damnit!...Wait, why do you want to-)**

**)Cause with the biotics she can actually do jediish stuff to entertain the kids.(**

**^Why did we bring her again?^**

**)Cause I don't want to babysit you idiots the whole time, and neither does she. We're trading off.(**

**^Well, why did we bring both of you? Iron and I would have had more fun without you.^**

**)Because dude, it's Disney World. Who would want to miss out on that?(**

**^Yeah, but how did you even find out in the first place?^**

**(...Uh, I don't know. _I _didn't tell him. Certainly not while under threat of being blown up again.)**

**^Flaker! Seriously, you didn't see me telling Layla or Danny.^**

**~But you posted, 'Going to Disney World with Iron. Fuck the rest of y'all.'~**

**^That was after I had already stolen the plane and was in the air.^**

**)Yeah, but Iron also kept broadcasting the plan over the link when he was trying to not do just that.(**

***Also, he wrote his note and left it on the fridge before he'd even left...while Bourne and I were still in the apartment. I literally watched him write the note and then stick it to the fridge.***

**(What? But I wrote it in code!)**

**)You wrote it with all the letters backwards. Then taped it to the fridge the wrong way so it was completely readable.(**

**^Dude, these are like the two people I absolutely do not want to be around.^**

**(Yeah, but this just means my brilliant plan worked.)**

**)...What?(*What?*^What?^**

**(You two are on this hijacked plane too, therefore if he and I get caught, you're also complicit for the crime.)**

**^That's stupid, we aren't going to get caught because the guy who we hijacked this from lives in an outhouse right by the airfield.^**

**(...Then why did he have a manticore chained up outside it?)**

**)And that statement/delusion alone explains why you suck at plans.(**

**^Okay, lets stop fighting or I will turn this thing around.^**

**(...Fine. Spoilsport. Try to cause a little chaos…)**

**^Yes, but your chaos ended up bringing more order! Don't you get it? You are a terrible villain and there is no real reason to be afraid of you!^**

**(...) **Crazey Metal has logged off to go cry in a corner.

**)I dunno, he could be worse at the job. At least he's kinda sorta funny at being psychopathic.(**

**^Yes, but taking over your body and becoming a god? It's like he was written in a children's book with the logic he uses to back that up. Saren on the other hand had a legitimate reason to take me on. Revenge, cold, maniacal, seething, revenge.^**

***He had that too, he just was more concerned with the nutjobness.***

**)And let's face it- T117's so vague with how exactly the reality warping works…Not to mention that whole 'could switch minds at any time' thing that kinda seemed like a deus ex machina for the sake of a better final boss.(**

**^Yeah, though I think we both had enough deus ex machinas to last the next couple books.^**

**)Yeah, those two morons did kinda make most of this up as they went...at least T117, I dunno about S7.(**

**^He had a general idea of how he wanted the plot to go but not where it would stop along the way.^**

***Yeah, that's kinda how T117 is with SaWoF right now.***

**~Yeah, this time Spike has made out a list of events and put in side plots along with intermixed tangents.~**

**)Trebor just kinda has certain scenes or missions planned out and just has to bridge the gaps- which is usually where the writer's block comes in.(**

**^Know the feeling. It's definitely hard to keep it going.^**

**)Still, at least he's got a backlog now, not even including this story.(**

**^Spike wishes he had that. He kinda just quit his job so his time is very constrained.^**

**)Yeah, whereas he has way more free time now cause his sports season is over.(**

**^Bitchin.^**

**)Yeah, he's up to thirteen chapters written for SaWoF.(**

**~Cool, well, I think we ought to wrap this up quick so I can catch my plane.~**

**^Plane? Why are you at an airport?^**

**~Because you all left me here and I want to go to Disney World too.~**

***Yeah, I was wondering why Ty was leaving you behind.***

**)I figured he had a death wish or something.(**

**^Okay, both of you shut up because this was supposed to be a big prank and Iron and I were going to post a picture of us kicking the shit out of Goofy and be like "wish you were here, not." But he screwed it up.^**

**(Did you really think telling me would end up not getting things screwed up? Being a crazy nutjob is basically my entire characterization.)**

**^Well, you are requiring depth because this is getting old. Maybe a love interest or someone that you try to prove yourself competent.^**

**(...What. The Fuck. Is wrong with you?)**

**^Nothing, but I bet fans would agree with me that you do start to wear on people a bit.^**

**(...Yeah, but the fans also kinda were against this story. I think if he's having a good time, Trebor don't give a fuck what the fans think- he's doing this cause he thinks it's fun, and other people liking it is just a bonus.)**

**^... Wow, so you are part sage as well as insane.^**

**(Hey, I had _some _good ideas during SiaWoF.)**

**^No, you really didn't.^**

**(I managed to trick Bourne and Hero with that whole 'can only switch bodies once' thing, and almost ended up killing him. And before that I was able to take down every single person the ground crew, while holding back and having Bourne fighting me. I also figured out and/or explained most of the reality warping stuff that was actually explained.)**

**^Okay, so you are good for exposition.^**

**)I think the trouble is that he's supposed to be kinda clever, but it gets lost beneath all the nutjobness and stupidity.(**

**^Alright, let's go. 1473I2.^**

**)Sayonara.(**


	23. Lovin in an Elevator

**Ty:**

So far this morning, I had been told I was being watched by Bourne, shunned by Hero or Hannah as she was known now, and shot three times. To top it all off now I was hanging on to the top of a car for dear life and praying that the people inside don't try to shoot through the glass.

I felt my left hand slip a bit and compensated by stabbing my glaive into the engine plate for a better hold. Looking down I saw one guy trying to point his gun at me and the other kept knocking his hand down. My guess was that it was his car.

"God, how did I end up here?" I asked to no one in particular.

Although, I left my comm open and it gave Bourne another chance for a smart ass remark. "I was going to ask you the same thing. I mean, you were gone for, what, ten- Shit turn TURN TURN-" He was cut off by the sounds of horns and metal bending. "Oh shut up Arnold, I haven't crashed yet, have I?"

"You know, I can't wait till we are in Shepard's apartment in three years and joking about 'the time I got shot three times and still managed to jump on a moving car.'"

"If we're both still around in three years, you can brag all you want. In the meantime- God damnit, learn how to drive you moron!"

"Bourne, how about you let Arnold take over your motor functions while you are driving. The suits can analyze patterns and take over motor control. I let Drew when we were fighting Samus."

"Yeah, he suggested that already. In fact, he's currently screaming at me to let him because- Yeah, I know, I see it." There was the sound of a truck's horn. "If you want to help, tell me how to turn on the damn siren so people stop being idiots and start moving out of the way!...I said the siren jackass, not the windshield wipers!...oh, you meant _that _one." The sound of sirens started up on his end. "And it'd help if someone told me where you were."

I looked back and saw a C-sec car about fifty yards below us. "Look up."

With a quick motion I slammed my left fist into the engine and it began smoking.

"A heads up earlier would have been nice Arnold, just saying. And do you have something in mind, or was there already smoke coming out of that thing?"

"I just did that." I looked down at the glass and saw that the guy with the gun had won the argument. He aimed it at my head and I moved fast to the front of the car. "Are you below us?"

"Yeah. Let me guess, you're going to jump and I'm going to have to catch you biotically?"

I pulled a grenade out of my belt and tossed it on the back of the car, "Nope." With a click on my omni-tool, the grenade detonated and we began to descend quickly. I took two steps forward but immediately tripped over my own feet. The effects of the blood loss were really starting to get to me.

"What, just jumping wouldn't give you 'style points'?" He asked, obviously irritated.

I looked over the edge and saw that we were right over the water. "No, I'm going to need you to fish me out of the river and I was wondering how fast you would be." With that I rolled off the side of the car and fell faster than I had before.

Drew had to take over motor controls after that. He pulled out the Tsunami assault rifle off my back and unloaded it into the water as we fell. It broke the surface just enough that I felt like I landed in grass than on pavement.

"If you can tread water or float, it'd make it easier to get you out of the- What do you mean the armor is too heavy to lift itself in water? Argh, how come nobody tells me this shit in advance?"

I began to sink down and my mind drifted to Virmire. _I could swim then, why not now?_ I still could recall the same panic as I held my breath, not wanting to find out if the suit could breathe underwater.

_Chances of survival dropping to 0.0000000000000000000000000000009%... no chance of rescue. Feeling pulse dropping._

I wanted so badly to tell him to shut up but I felt my mind beginning to go blank and numb. I had beaten the game once already, only to fall into some water and drowned on my second playthrough. I already felt every gamer ever laughing at me.

I released my breath and tried to take in another but all I got was water.

**Shepard:**

Cecelia stepped out of the elevator and saw a black figure fall into the water with a huge splash. Her eyes darted up and she saw a car crash through one of the bridges and hang over the side by it's internal wires.

"Bourne? What the hell happened?!" She asked, reestablishing the com. "I think I just saw-"

"Ty just landed in the water- and these suits are too heavy for swimming, so I can't go after him unless…Good call Arnold. There should some sort of floatation devices down there, for situations like this. If it works on a Turian or Krogan, oughta be enough for him."

Running to the side of river, Cecelia saw a small orange hatch that had a picture of life preservers on it. With a quick twitch of her wrist, she popped it's seal and grabbed one of them out. The were a kind that used contained air capsules so it could be deployed under water.

"He is seriously going to owe me for this", Cecelia commented as she began to strip away her armor until she was down to the skin tight suit underneath._Why didn't I wear underwear today? _She cursed herself as she put on her helmet and sealed it, knowing she wouldn't be able to hold her breath that long.

"If you need help collecting, I'm more than happy to help." Bourne replied. "Arnold, find me a place to land this damn thing before I actually do crash…Alright, I see it."

"Just watch my stuff when you get here." After that, she dove into the water and swam downward at the fastest pace she could. As she did, she noticed trash and debris float by her face on multiple occasions but luckily none got in her way.

Cecelia hit the bottom of the lake but couldn't see Ty anywhere. It was the damn black on the back of his armor, he must have landed face down. She activated her omni-tool, and began sweeping its flashlight through the water.

It was still difficult to find him but luckily a shine caught her eye. After she got in close, she noticed that it was the glaive on his back. Shepard acted as quick as possible and laced the vest onto him and hit the button to inflate. Ty rose up out of the water faster than he sank and she took hold of his leg catching a lift to the surface.

After they were on the surface, it was a short swim to shore where Bourne was already waiting. He was pacing, shooting looks at Ty whenever he turned.

She got to the shore and Bourne helped her haul Ty up. "Damn it, why does he have to be a hero all the time?"

He shrugged, lifting Ty with one hand and lifting her out with the other. "Your stuff's over there." He said, gesturing as he set Ty down. "Arnold, what's his status?"

Removing her helmet, Shepard leaned over Ty and put her ear to his chest. "I'm not hearing a pulse."

"He's gone into cardiac arrest from the water. His lungs are filled with it." Bourne said. "There any way I can dial back the strength, or...yeah, I figured as much."

Shepard placed her hands on his mask and began trying to open it up. "Damn, how do you get this open?"

"Arnold." Bourne said, voicing it almost as a command.

After a moment, the faceplate split apart, revealing Ty's disfigured face. "Okay, I am going to give him CPR. Pray his body is one that has the lazarus syndrome."

If Bourne made a reply, she didn't hear it as she began doing chest compressions, keeping her focus on the rhythm, and looking at his face to see if there were any changes.

Shepard took a breath and blew into Ty's mouth, pinching his nose to make sure that all of the air went down. As soon as she finished blowing she pulled her head away and Ty coughed up some water but didn't move. She went back to doing chest compressions and followed them with a breath in repeat.

After five minutes of CPR, Ty showed no signs of waking and she had to assume the worst. "I don't think he is coming back."

Bourne's head dipped down. "Damnit."

"I think he still needs mouth-to-mouth one more time."

Shepard's eye twitched and she looked down at Ty. He was smiling but his eyes were sunken in and he looked about ready to throw up.

"How about we get him treatment for the blood loss before you beat him for that?" Bourne suggested mildly.

Shepard disregarded what Bourne just said and took Ty's advice. She leaned in and gave him one long kiss. Then she pulled away and grabbed her armor off the ground.

"Uh, Arnold, you recorded that, right?" Bourne muttered in an undertone she barely heard. "Good. Might in come in handy later."

"Shut up and call an ambulance. I can't feel my legs." Ty said half jokingly and half serious.

"I called one when she went in after you." He replied, crossing his arms. "Not the smartest move by the way...yeah, I know Arnold, it was kinda cool, but it was also stupid."

Shepard started putting her armor back on. "How long ago did you wake up?" She asked the User.

"I don't think even he's dumb enough to answer that." Bourne commented. "But, I've been wrong before…Arnold, while I appreciate your intention, I actually don't want to know the answer."

"I woke up about two seconds into you saying that I wasn't going to wake. Drew said something about you trying to initiate a lazarus effect but my body couldn't do it until you stopped."

"And why didn't he tell...Bourne, what's yours? Arnold?"

"Yes. And that's actually a good question." He answered as he walked over to the User. "I swear, at first I thought the benefits of these things might outweigh the negatives, but I'm beginning to rethink that assessment."

"Sorry, last time I used this armor. Everything was a video game, remember?" Ty said in a flat tone. "Ever think that it might be different in the real world?"

"What do you mean, the last time I used this armor everything was a video game?" Shepard questioned.

"Must be the blood loss talking." Bourne replied calmly.

Shepard pulled on the last bit of her armor, but something else hit her. "Hold on, back in the medbay after you guys first joined, he said something else a lot like that."

Ty laughed, "Uh, duh. How do you think I learned how to use these powers? I learned them in a video game called Mass Effect."

"Drew, can you shut down his vocal chords?" Bourne asked. "I swear, everytime he gets injured, he's like this. Everything reminds him of an old game from before humans left earth. Bloody irritating."

"What do you mean, everytime I get injured? Look, in the base that they hooked up the nanites up to me, they had a videogame that allowed me to use my powers. Like your simulator."

She looked between the two of them, but with Bourne's faceplate closed and Ty's stupid grin, she couldn't tell what either of them were thinking. But she got the feeling they were hiding something; it made enough sense, but her gut was sending off serious warning signals. "Okay, we will be talking about this later. Now, we better get him to Chakwas. That ambulance doesn't look like it's getting here soon."

The biotic shifted his feet slightly. "Traffic was pretty bad on the way here." He looked over at the car he'd arrived in. "Also, I 'borrowed' that from a pair of C-sec officers, and I'd rather not be arrested, so yeah, let's go."

She let Bourne grab Ty with his biotics and they entered the elevator going up. "So, you gonna take Ashley out now since you have a few hours before we leave?" She asked him.

"...Either you weren't really looking at his face while you were doing that, or...nope, don't really have an 'or'. That seems the only explanation. And the scars mean I'm even uglier."

She waved him off, "Just leave your helmet up and you will be fine. The armor looks kind of cool when you get used to it."

He shrugged noncommittally. "Maybe."

"So, I'm guessing you are wondering how we got here?"

"Its a case of I somewhat want to know, but suspect I don't want to know. But seeing as the only real alternative to pass the time is twenty questions, might as well."

"Ty shot out of a wall in front of me after I just finished threatening one of my old fellow gang members. The bastard tried to get me to release a buddy of his. To which I said I would castrate him for threatening for attempting to blackmail me. Anyway, we got to the Presidium when the same guy tried to kill me in a drive by. Ty saw it coming, tackled me to cover and then ran and jumped on their car; it was going slow so they could put more bullets in my direction."

He glanced at the User, being held a few feet of the ground biotically.. "So did you get shot tackling her, or did they shoot you through the roof?"

He grunted as he shifted his body. "Tackling. They had a HMWA so it was pretty much guaranteed that they would have hit one of us. Though, I am wondering how they got a weapon you can only buy with spectre level clearance on the Citadel."

"You sure they weren't just using a normal gun with modded rounds?" Bourne asked somewhat skeptically.

Shepard cursed when she realized what had happened. "I ordered one to be sent to the Normandy. They must have hijacked the shipment just to give me the middle finger."

Bourne's hand went to his chin, obviously thinking, though he didn't say anything. It was even more annoying to Shepard that even if the faceplate was open, she still probably wouldn't be able to tell what he was thinking.

"You know what Shepard?"

Shepard looked down at Ty, "What?"

"You look pretty cute when you are confused."

Cecelia immediately bit her tongue and tried to change her focus so she wouldn't blush. To her dismay, she didn't succeed and by the way Bourne's faceplate tilted in her direction he noticed. The only thing that gave her sanctuary was Bourne's reaction to her death glare.

He shrugged, but didn't say anything. Then he suddenly went tense. "What? Are you sure?"

"What is it?"

He looked at the doors. "He just intercepted an insecure transmission. Those two somehow managed to survive the crash...and they're waiting for us at C-sec with about a dozen friends. And probably spectre grade weaponry."

Ty stood up shaking but managed to grab out his pistol. "Okay, lets kick ass and take guns."

"Yeah, they outnumber us like twenty to one, so the odds are pretty uneven." Bourne chuckled. "Maybe we should ask them if they want to get some friends, give themselves a fighting chance."

Shepard kept her calm face and grabbed her sniper off her back. "Don't get cocky. They are still armed and one of us isn't in shape to be fighting."

Ty joked, patting him on the back. "Yeah Bourne, you look like you have gotten out of shape recently."

He ignored that. "Arnold, factor in my current reaction time, and how long until the doors open, and tell me exactly when to move. I want to be hitting them immediately after the doors open and take them by surprise."

Cecelia aimed down her scope and checked her field of accuracy. "Okay, first plan is to get to cover. Next, take them out but leave one that looks like a squealer alive."

"Not sure we'll have much cover in the middle of C-sec. Going to have to ask how they managed that with the lucky one."

"You guys ever see the movie Die Hard?" Ty asked.

"Do I look like I watch alot of vids?" Cecelia asked rhetorically.

"I somehow never saw that one." Bourne commented.

Ty pulled a grenade out and threw it on the ceiling. "Throw all your grenades on the ceiling. I can glitch us to a place in C-sec and we can watch as a group of them step in here, thinking we were hiding. Then, pow, we blow them to hell in a handbasket."

"Good idea, but sticking them to the back wall has a higher chance of catching them. If they see it's empty, I doubt they'd check it." Bourne replied. "With that much explosive force focused through one exit point, all they have to do is stand in front of it."

Cecelia had to mull it over for a second. "Are you sure you can do your 'glitch jump' thing without dropping dead?"

"Your heart was stopped for at least a few minutes." Bourne agreed. "I'd rather not have it stop happen permanently; I'm not a fan of funerals. Especially for fri- for co-workers."

Ty waved them off. "Then, how do you plan to deal with Raptor's funeral? It's gonna happen soon."

Bourne turned to Cecelia. "So, let me offer my alternative suggestion- using a human shield."

Ty reached over and pulled open a portal in the wall. "Get through, unless… wait… my heart."

Ty fake acted like he was dying but then laughed and stepped through the portal.

"You know, it'd sure be a shame if he "accidently" got hit by friendly fire while I was aiming at another merc and they just "happened" to move slightly." Bourne commented before stepping through himself.

Cecelia stepped to the odd rift and Ty reached his hand through. Cecelia took it and snuck her way in to find it led to the C-sec outfitters room.

"So, did either of you actually stick any other grenades to the wall before you stepped through?" Bourne asked. "Because while we have surprise on our side, it'd be nice if some of the work was done for us."

"I threw the only one that I had." Ty said looking at her and Bourne.

She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Do we have time for me to go back?"

"It'll open in about 20 seconds." Bourne responded, pistol in hand as he slowly and quietly made his way up the stairs.

She suddenly heard gunfire coming from that direction.

"Glad we got out though. Those rounds tore right through the door." He was suddenly surrounded in a green barrier of biotic energy. "Ty, if I throw a singularity out there, can you detonate it with a flare?"

"That's not the question, the question is whether I can lose the blood through my nose and still function."

"Good point. Plan D. Shepard, how many grenades do you have?"

Shepard looked at her belt. "Six, they all have fire damage III modifier."

They suddenly flew from her belt into his hands. "Time to try a trick from Hannah's playbook." They hovered in the air around a smaller singularity. "I'll toss these into the middle, then we rush in and deal with anyone still standing. Sound like a plan? Good, because we don't have time to come up with another one." He sprinted up and around the corner, and the sounds of explosions were followed by screams and gunfire.

Ty closed his faceplate and pointed to the door. "Let's roll- or in my case hobble."

**Bourne:**

One of them spotted me as I rounded the corner and threw the grenades into the center of them. Unfortunately for him, I immediately followed up the grenades by tossing a knife into his throat. He fell a few seconds before I detonated the grenades, and took out almost half of them.

The others immediately opened fire in my direction, and I rolled to the side, then took off sprinting. With Arnold's new upgrades, they didn't get within more than a foot of me, and I tossed a singularity into the center of them. I didn't have time to detonate it before they got smart enough to start firing in front of me and behind me, and I had to put up a domed barrier to keep the worst of it off of me. A few rounds made it through, but were stopped by suit's shields.

I looked over at the singularity and a small blue biotic orb collided with it sending the majority of them flying before the secondary explosion finished off the closest ones. The ones that weren't killed were knocked off balance, affecting their aim. _Bout time I got to do this. _I dropped the shield, and charged at the one in the middle. He was knocked in the air, and the others turned towards me, guns ready_. Hook line and sinker. _I let out a yell as I slammed my fist into the ground, and the energy I'd built up from the charge expanded outward, knocking all but one to the ground. I pulled his gun from his grasp with my right hand, and activated my omni-blade with the other, sending it right through his heart. The others tried getting to their feet, but between my Assassin, Shepard's sniper rifle, and Ty's Glaive, they lasted about 6 seconds.

I looked up, and caught the one I'd knocked up in the air with my biotics before he hit the ground. He looked up at me, and dropped his gun, putting his hands above his head, shouting almost incoherently about surrendering. "Guess we found the squeeler." I commented, aiming my S-17 at him just in case he changed his mind.

"Dibs on torture", Ty called to called to me from cover.

"I am NOT being good cop this time." I called back, dropping the idiot on the ground and driving the wind out of him. "Now, if I were unfortunate to be you, I'd suggest you start talking while you still have a tongue to do it with."

"Okay, I was born on Earth in Chicago on May 17th, 2153. My parents were Catherine and James Jass."

"What's your name?" Cecelia questioned.

"Hue."  
I lifted him into the air, and slammed him down hard enough to knock the wind out of him again. "While I doubt you'd be enough of an idiot to lie about that to three people who very much want to kill you, I'm more interested in how you got Spectre grade weapons, and what happened to all the C-sec officers around here."

"Some of our guys took a bomb down to the lowest levels of Zakera Ward and blew a hole in an airlock. Then, we killed the C-sec that were left and took the weapons."

I lifted him into the air so we were eye-level. "You know, I'm curious about something. Can you give me a reason to just kill you-" I nodded my head forward, and heard the hiss as my faceplate split open. "Instead of making your face even uglier than mine first?"

His face went green as he took in my appearance and I moved him away from me with literally a second to spare before he started puking; I still ended up with a few splatters on my boots. _Crap, this thing better not be dry-clean only._

"I hope your other reasons are more convincing." Cecelia commented. "Bourne, close that faceplate before one of us ends up doing the same thing. Then knock this idiot out so we can interrogate him later, when Ty isn't on his last legs."

"I think I can taste the ocean." He commented.

"Probably because you swallowed half of one."

I closed the helmet and glanced over at him, since he'd said the exact same thing before he'd passed out on Therum.

"Can we take him back to the ship, I think I am going to die… literally." He started swaying slightly.

I dropped the Merc and lifted Ty into the air slightly with my powers. "You look about ready to pass out. How about we get you to Chakwas, then we finish dealing with-?" I suddenly realized the merc had made a break for it. _Well, that answers the question of how to knock him out. _ I reached towards him, and he slammed full force into the solid barrier that appeared in front of him. He bounced off, swayed for a moment, and then fell to the ground. "And we should make sure that idiot stays alive long enough for one of us to kill him."

"Good plan. Ty, can you walk without help?"

"I don't think so." Ty fell to the side, but didn't hit the ground thanks to my biotics. "Yeah, I got you. You need me to carry him too Shepard?" I gestured to the unconscious gang member.

Ty shook his head. "Nah, I can do it. Just need someone to lean on."

"Then if I'd still be supporting you, why not just have me do all the work?"

Cecelia took Ty's arm and swung it over her shoulder. "I can get Ty, you get him."

"If you insist." I said, already walking towards the elevator to the Normandy. The merc lifted up into the air behind me.

"So, Cecelia, what's your favorite movie?" By that question, Ty was either legitimately trying to get to know her or taking his mind off the pain. Or possibly trying to flirt, though I thought that one was less likely.

"Its a movie called Romantic Apocalypse."

Ty nodded but his head bobbed down a little farther than it looked like he intended. "What's it about?"

"It's a comedy about how people believe that the best romances come near to an apocalypse. Heh, at one point the guy is confessing his love for the girl as the nukes begin striking and she's like 'Now? Really?!' It makes me laugh every time."

"Does it have some line about 'you don't want to die a virgin, do you?'" I asked with a chuckle.

Shepard laughed again. "Yep the black guy who constantly talks about sex is in it. The asshole who is all about himself. Then, there's the fat one that eats all the food and everybody flips so they kick him out."

"What, does it take place at a frat house?"

"No, that's the best part. It takes place in an office building. Bunch of stiffs working until they realize they are doomed."

"That's why I like a gig like this. If you go out, you go out with a bang, not a whimper."

"What about you, Ty? Got a favorite movie?" She asked as we piled into the elevator.

"Trust me, when my movie hits eighty-eight miles per hour. You're going to see some serious shit." Ty replied.

"Back to the future huh? You know, I've never actually seen that, but I know half the plot just from references to it in old comedy vids." I commented. That earned me a scandalous look from the User- or at least I guessed it was, since he'd finally closed the faceplate.

"What?! Bourne, we can't be friends until you see the movies. I'll find a torrent file online, Shepard can get the whole crew, and we all can chill in the comm room tonight and bond over Marty McFly and Doc Brown."

"What about you Bourne, you got a favorite flick?" Shepard asked me. "Maybe we can do a double feature."

I thought for a moment. "Well, it'd have to be either the Avengers, or Django Unchained. But since the former is a crossover between several other films, I'd go with the latter for movie night."

"Mine is three movies Shepard." Ty said laughing about something he probably remembered from the movies.

"You mean they made two sequels and labeled them part 2 and part 3." I pointed out.

Ty pointed at me and I could feel his scorn. "They are legitimate parts and must be viewed along with the first part."

I rolled my eyes behind my faceplate. _At least if I end up falling asleep, nobody will be able to tell._

_Unless you begin to snore. _Arnold sounded distinctly amused.

"Then how about we do that tonight, and Bourne picks the movies next time?" Cecelia suggested.

I shrugged. "I got no issue with that."

"Just think Bourne, you can sit by Ashley and Tali and see how awkward it gets."

My head whipped towards Ty, so quickly for a moment I almost was worried I'd broken my own neck.

_That is extremely unlikely to happen unless there is prior damage. _

"What do you mean, Ashley and Tali?"

Shepard raised an eyebrow at me. "You seriously haven't noticed? I would have thought you would have picked up on it first."

I slumped against the wall. _Great. The chick I stabbed is into me. Maybe I'll just skip movie night and do some 'questioning.' _

_ Is that code for a sex thing?_

_ )I mean I'm considering just beating the hell out of the idiot I'm carrying with my biotics. And possibly cutting off a few of his fingers.(_

_ Ah, because it is common for men of your age to want to experiment with sex. Most of the time it involves multiple women and seeing as how you already have Ashley and Tali courting you, it seemed only logical that that's where you would be going with your conversation._

"Ty, can you please tell Arnold to shut the hell up?"

"Arnold, compute pie for the next few hours. Stop when you have found a digit that has repeated one-thousand times but no speaking while you do it."

"Thank you." I said, leaning back against the wall. _Trying to explain human romance to an AI is the last thing I want to do right now, let alone monogamy and all the risks for quarians…though I probably should have asked how to get the puke off my boots before Ty did that. _"Uh, Ty, know you hate the questions but...how do you clean this thing?"

Ty perked up a bit and I noticed the healing program he made was active. "I just took a shower."

_And since I'm not XO this time around, I can't lock the thing. Guess I'll have to hope for the best...though I'm not sure the worst is all that bad either. _

_ No, wait, worse would be seeing Wrex naked. Ugh, definitely very bad. _

Shepard pulled Ty up a bit and looked like she was slightly struggling holding Ty. "Did you suddenly get heavier?"

Ty shook his head. "No, I am still my regular self."

I looked at them both, hoping I wouldn't have to catch them before they fell. Though from the way she was leaning, that seemed somewhat likely. "You alright?"

"Yeah, just feels like Ty got heavier all the sudden."

Ty planted his left foot and put more pressure on it. "How about now?"

"That's better, I guess."

"Your healing thing doing something maybe?" I suggested. "If it's replenishing blood, you'd be getting a lot, and that stuff can't be light in that quantity."

Ty thought for a moment and then pushed off Shepard. "Not so dizzy now. It must, sweet. I thought I just made it to fix bones and organ tissue."

"Must accelerate blood production too then. Unless its the Technocyte."

"Maybe both."

Shepard got a little weary and backed away from us. "You are sure that stuff isn't contagious to me?"

I looked at Ty, wondering if the mental link was up back up yet. _Well, he said the amplification phase was over, so…)She has a point. I ended up with it after all.(_

_ ^You are a person from the real world. Nobody, not even Danny and Cody got it last time. Maybe it was the exchange of our blood.^_

_ )Yeah. That, or I got it when I tried reviving you after you got stabbed.( _

"That look does not fill me with confidence." Cecelia said, taking another step back.

_)...You don't think she could get it from mouth to mouth, do you?(_

_ ^... Let's find out.^_

Ty grabbed Shepard by the shoulders and swung her to side and tipped her off balance. In that quick second he parted his mask and planted a kiss on her lips.

_)Movie night is going to be a very somber event after she murders you.(_

I thought that she would pop Ty right then and there but instead she held his kiss until they both pulled away. "Do you feel like you are made of metal now?"

"Ty, you are either the bravest man I've ever met, or the most idiotic." I commented, taking a step away from Shepard.

Ty sat her back up straight and she balanced herself. "I don't know, I feel have a lump of metal in my gut right now."

"Will you two love birds get a room already?" I groaned. "Because the last thing my photographic memory needs is...and that's an image that'll be stuck in my brain forever now. Great."

Ty smiled once before his visor closed again. "You know, I am more curious as to why you are thinking of that between us then why are you are afraid of having the picture in your brain."

Shepard laughed and wiped her mouth. "Heh, yeah Bourne. Are you just a perverted sicko who wants to watch other people?"

I glanced at the window, considering whether I'd be able to safely land with my biotics if I broke through it. _Or possibly, throw them through it. _I looked at the two of them, Shepard with a grin on her face, and Ty no doubt hiding the ultimate shiteating grin behind his visor. _Time for the old standby: Pulling a lie out of my ass. _ "Let me put it this way- I walked in once on Hannah making out with her Drell boyfriend, and tripping balls as a result. I am forced to have retained every single second of it, _perfectly. _ Kinda ruined the whole institution for me."

"Wait, Bourne has Perfect memory? As in photographic?" Cecelia's smile faded and was replaced by curiosity coupled with a slight insanity that only renegades carried.

"How did you think I memorized the alliance handbook?" I asked, trying to divert her questioning away from what she had in mind that would no doubt be unpleasant for me.

"Bourne, have you ever imagined an Asari with a penis?"

"That's it, I'm breaking the glass and jumping." I tossed the merc on the ground. "You can pick me up later."

Ty grabbed me and put me in a full nelson. "Woe der, no need for that."

I responded by stomping on the ground and setting off a Nova, which stunned him enough for me to break his hold, turn, and punch him in the gut hard enough to send him flying into the wall. "Ty, I'm finally starting to not hate you completely. Don't ruin it." It was said in a half joking tone, half threatening tone.

"Bourne, if you jump, I will have Arnold cut your motor function." Ty stood up and laughed as he said it. "The landing won't kill you but damn it will hurt."

I shrugged. "I've had worse." I smiled slightly. "But since you reassured me I'd survive-" I grabbed him by the head, shattered the glass with a single kick, and threw him out the open window. "I'll feel guilty about that later, but right now it just feels right."

Immediately after I said that, I felt a boot hit the center of my back and I flew out too. I activated the com as I fell. "You know Shepard, I don't blame you so much for doing that as I blame myself for not anticipating it."

I looked down and immediately I slammed into Ty. "Hey, asshole, remember me?"

He grabbed my sides with his legs and commanded Arnold to open my faceplate. After the suit bastard did, Ty began giving blow after blow to my face as we fell. "Still… less… painful… than… the… Cipher… or… having… Hannah… torn… out… of… my… head."

Ty got angrier and put both his fist together and slammed them down on my face causing my eyes to go out of focus. "Relax body!"

_)You are a cocksucking piece of shit, anyone ever tell you that?(_

We slammed into the C-sec floor and both rolled around in pain. _^Ugh, I'll let you borrow my repair program after I fix myself up with it.^_

_ )Can we just stop trying to beat the shit out of each other? Or least call a truce while you can just shut me down like that? Talk about a stacked deck(_

He moved his elbow over and gave a weak shot to my side but it still hurt a bit thanks to my newly cracked ribs_. ^I didn't shut you down. I told you to relax your body. It lessens the impact. Haven't you ever seen RIPD?^ _

_)Then why didn't you let me use my biotics to slow us down so we didn't hit with as much force?(_

_^Because, you would have let me fall all the way down here. Without biotics.^_

_)You started it!(_

_*I don't know what you idiots are arguing about, but if you don't keep it down so I can get some fucking peace and quiet, I will find and murder both of you! I just spent 20 minutes listening to Wrex and Garrus argue, so I'm not in the mood!*_

_ ^There is no way you could take either of us on, even if we just fell fifty stories.^_

_ )You know, I never, ever, ever thought I'd say this: I actually miss the old days when the only one in my head was Iron. At least I could guess what he'd do.(_

_^I miss when I had nobody in my head and I wasn't thrown out of windows by people that can't even call me their friend.^_

_)Let's check the records here. Tali was my friend, Iron stabbed her in the gut. Raptor was my friend, Iron tried killing her, and she's going to die in just a few weeks anyway. Hero is my friend, and Sovereign killed her before you brought her back out. Generally, when I call someone my friend, they end up in harms way.(_

_*And how does you tossing him out of an elevator not count as 'in harm's way'?*_

_)...it was survivable.(_

_ ^I didn't say it wouldn't hurt like getting a back massage from an elcor either. But it did.^_

_ )Yeah, you finally got me my head back to myself, then infected me with a new one that'll probably end up killing me. I'd say we're even.(_

_ ^Please, we aren't going to die. I can guarantee that.^_

_ )And you're basing that guarantee on what, exactly?(_

_ ^Because Bourne: nobody is going to die this time.^_

I thought about responding, but my brain felt like there was an axe through it, so I decided to just shut up and recover.

**(Ty and Cecilia, sitting in a tree, K-i-s-s-a-n-g...wait, did I spell that right?)**

**^... I don't know what is worse. The fact that you can't spell or that you are making fun of me for kissing basically the gender-swapped you.^**

**(...Is that you hitting on me or something?)**

**S7: Anyway, only 8 days until I go to Emerald City Comicon.**

**T117: Lucky.**

**S7: Don't worry, I'll send you pics. I'll even try to get one with the guy from Arrow.**

**(Which one? Cause like, every dude on that show is a badass. And so are most of the chicks.)**

**S7: The main character. The guy who plays Oliver.**

**T117:Stephen Amell- you know that guy does all his own stunts with the workouts and stuff?**

***That's the awesome thing about that show. Guys can watch it for the action and guys getting killed, ladies can watch it cause that guy is just ripped.***

**S7: It's a little creepy that you just wrote that Trebor.**

***What? I'm just saying what half the internet has also said.* **N7pro has been logged off by host due to excessive fangirl vibes.

**(Thank you.) )Thanks.(**

**T117: Anyway, I'm guessing since Ty's a Flash fan you're kinda excited by the Flash tv show the CW is working on?**

**S7: Yes, yes I am.**

**T117: Wonder why two of the somewhat lesser known DC heroes are succeeding yet they screwed up Wonder Woman?**

**S7: I don't know, but I feel that I have to comment on a review by a guest a few days ago on me stating that in my story, Shepard was the only one that could kill Saren.**

**T117: Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say if he got it wrong, or misunderstood it...Yeah, honestly on my last playthrough I did the same thing, and just kinda didn't want to mention it cause it wasn't really a big deal and it fit in with the story and all that, but since the subject's been brought up…**

**S7: It was definitely artistic licensing to the max but it was also to make it a challenge for my character to deal with Saren. It was actually right after I read that Bourne killed Saren that I made the choice to say only Shepard could.**

**(Technically, I'm the one who killed-)**

**)I'm the one who blasted the hole in his chest.(**

**(Yeah, with _my _biotics!)**

**)Semantics.(**

**S7: Well, to me it just felt… wrong. The story is about Commander Shepard the Badass who can overcome any obstacle put before him.**

***Or her.***

**S7: Whatever, point is that no matter how powerful my characters were, Shepard was the one that had to be the hero. Not Ty, not Cody, and definitely not Danny. In all reality of the story, none of the Users are supposed to take the Commander's place in full. Sure there was BDTS DLC but I never really felt like that fit into the grand scheme of things other than to say "Hey, this is what a batarian is and why you should hate them!"**

**T117: Yeah, I get that. The whole reason I did things the way I did is that Saren just never felt like a genuine threat to me. I mean, the only time you see him fighting in game he's either no tougher than anyone else, or he's just assassinating a guy. Yeah, he's a Spectre and all, but...I dunno, it just didn't fit what I was going for. So introducing my own original-sorta, since it's a version of Shepard- character gave me more room to work with and gave me some room to be more...original. And with the whole "taking over for Shepard" thing, the whole point is that Bourne's not Shepard, but that doesn't mean he can't still be a hero.**

**(Really more like anti hero...AH! See, you stabbing me just proves my point Bourne!...hehe, point.)**

**S7: Yes, but in your story it could go on without Raptor. You even made your character a Spectre.**

**)What, you're saying I'm not Spectre material?( **

**T117: I'm debating how much to say here since some of that'll be answered in SaWoF, but the basis of it is that they both need each other. Raptor needs someone willing to get his hands dirty when he needs to, and tell her when she's wrong. Bourne needs someone to reign him in when he considers going too far, and tell him when he's being a thick headed idiot.**

***I thought that was more my job.***

**T117: Yeah, a little, but you were also kinda a plot device so Bourne wasn't pure vanguard. I seriously have died a lot with that character type...and Singularities are cool.**

**S7: Yeah, and I will explain that better in Users: Prime instead of saying that Shepard is the only one programed to kill Saren but that isn't going to change. The way I see it with my character, he is a means to get to the end but he cannot do certain things to advance the story. He's not the Commander, he's not god (No matter how many times he or Bourne says he is) and he's not just a regular guy. He is Ty, an under budget, under appreciated and definitely underpaid main character in my story Users. Ty is the main protagonist in my story He is a kid first and adult second kind of person. He manages to keep in touch with his kid in side while taking on the world of Mass Effect. He was not expecting a challenge at the beginning of his journey but will find that it isn't as easy in this play through.**

**(Did you just copy and paste that from his profile on your author page?)**

**S7: So?**

**T117: So it's like your guy is "I can't do everything" whereas my guy is "I can do more than I think" or maybe those should be you and your. **

**S7: Basically. Though Users 2 is gonna be heading into a darker place. Think, if Users was Rock and Roll then this one is Punk Rock.**

**T117: Yeah, not sure that mine fits a music metaphor, but Surviving is definitely going to be darker than Stuck. Or at least that's the goal kinda.**

**S7: Well, you know where Ty is so far. Do you think he's having fun?**

**T117: What, you think Bourne is?**

**S7: I'm just saying that Bourne is kinda… better off then Ty while they wait for Mass Effect 2 to roll around.**

**T117: Yeah, I'll give you that.**

**(But Ty's also not quite as ugly as Bourne, so he at least has that going for him.)**

**^Hey, I just got back from getting some coffee and I have to ask, what did you mean before about how well off I am?^**

**S7: Oh, would you look at the lines. We better wrap this up quick.**

**)You guys are such assholes about that.(**

**^I swear, I will throw this coffee on your keyboard.^**

**(I wouldn't recommend that- it'll probably explode in your face...I speak from experiance that that hurts)**

**S7: 1473I2  
T117: Sayonara.**


	24. Let's Drunk Get so You're Go Home Drunk

**Ty:**

"Today is the worst day ever, and it isn't even 5:00 am."

_ )Look on the brightside: if it gets worse, it'll be ages before you top it.( _

I flipped on my shower and let the water being running down the armor. "Can you talk without the whole mind thing for like ten minutes?"

_)You all but broke my jaw in half. If I open it, it's almost as painful as the actual fall was. I've got a high pain tolerance, but I'm not a freaking masochist.(_

_ "_Fine, but you were the one who threw me out of an elevator first. I was pissed off enough that all I wanted to do was beat you until we inevitably hit the ground."

He glared at me through his mask as he flipped on his own shower. _)You caught me in a nelson, so you started the altercation. I just was finishing it. Until Cecelia restarted it.(_

I opened my mouth to say something but immediately closed it as Tali walked into the showers. "Well, look who it is. Come to find more dirt on my life to tell people?"

_)It wasn't...Forget it, I'm not in the mood to deal with this, so you go right ahead and do whatever the fuck you want. ( _

I turned around and grabbed some soap from the dispenser. _^Fine, I'll just finish up so that you can talk to her.^_

_ )She doesn't get this channel.(_

_ ^I can let her in on the gold package if you want.^_

_ )The whole point of this thing is so that if we need to talk about something sensitive, they won't hear it! And we have got enough people in our heads as is! If I really need to talk to her, I have the text-to-speech function on my omni-tool. As it is, I plan on avoiding her and hoping she and Garrus hook up again.(_

That last part caught me by surprise. "What?"

"I said, what are you talking about?" Tali answered, somewhat louder than was necessary.

I turned around and stood so that I was looking down on her. "Bourne was telling me that I shouldn't throttle you for telling Hero what you did but I really don't want to listen to him."

"I already threw you out of an elevator. Please don't make me put you in stasis or through a wall or something." He suddenly said. I'd set up the healing program so Arnold could run it like it was on Wi-Fi, and it looked like it'd started working.

"Why should I? I can't even go near Hannah now. Everything will just be awkward, and I was hoping that my feelings would just pass but some little bitch had to tell her."

"Yeah, because you looked really broken up about it about half an hour ago." Bourne said sarcastically.

"Oh, so you are saying that if I would have ran up to Ashley within the first twenty-four hours of us meeting her and said that Bourne likes you, you would have been okay then?"

"...Doesn't mean you have to be a dick about it."

I felt my blood begin to boil and I punched into the wall, leaving a fist shaped dent. "Doesn't mean I have to be quiet about it neither. It was fucking embarrassing, worse than anything else that has happened to me… ever."

"Excuse me."

We both looked at Tali. "What?" I asked, irritated beyond measure.

"I know I screwed up. I have a bad habit of telling other people what I find out any time I find something new. It comes with living on the Flotilla. We are terrible gossipers and through that I developed bad habits. So-"

I turned around and opened my mask so that I could wash my face. "I don't want to hear you make excuses about it Tali."

_)Oh come on, you've screwed up way worse than that. I mean, at least she's owning up to it and apologizing._

_^She's trying to tell me it's her people's fault, not hers.^_

There was a faint thud, and I looked over to see he'd thrown his hands up in irritation, and accidently sent his thumbs through the wall. He looked up at them with a sigh. "You know, that's like nine times someone's damaged a wall on this ship."

I looked at Bourne and knew exactly what I wanted Tali to do to make amends. I pulled her in close and whispered into her ear receptors. "Arnold, shut off Bourne's ears for a couple seconds. If you want me to forgive you, then you will need to tell Bourne how you have something for him."

Tali stepped back and blinked several times. "How did you…?"

"You haven't hid it very well."

"Ty, I know that you're the reason Arnold just cut my auditory senses, so if he doesn't put it back in the next five seconds, your head is going to make the number of dents an even ten" Bourne almost yelled, unable to judge how loud he was talking.

"You have until Noveria to do it. Ears back on Arnold."

I switched off the shower and grabbed my towel off the rack.

"You said earlier you had a plan to get these things off us without killing us in the process. While I was suffering from a concussion at the time and didn't have the mental capability to ask about it, a few more details would be nice right about now."

"Bourne, I am a User. I do my best work when I improvise at the last second."

"Yeah, that's what I figured." He muttered as he shut off his shower and pulled a towel to him with his powers. _)We should be landing on Feros in about...7 hours. So in the meantime, I'm going to be trying to get my reality warping to work with me for once and maybe move my armor back to normal.(_

I shook my head and let the water keep running. "Whatever man, I am enjoying having Drew back. He's a good guy to talk to when idiot biotics throw me out of elevators at fifty stories."

_Can we beat his face in again?_

"No Drew, much as I'd like to." The thought of beating him again gave me a smile.

"Don't worry Drew, I hate that he can't shut up too. Maybe one of these days he'll learn how." He walked out with that, before I could reply.

"Drew, can you tell Arnold to shut down his leg function?"

_ Yes._

I smiled and looked at Tali. "Wait for it… do it."

There was a loud bang in the dressing room followed by tons of cursing.

_)You know, at least when I was an ass with Raptor, all she did was hit me. Can't believe I'd rather take a few dozen of her punches then deal with this tecnocrap.(_

_ ^Again, it's great to have Drew back.^_

_ )Yeah, great. Give me back my legs before I crawl in there and find some way to hurt you. And before you ask how, necessity is the mother of invention.(_

_^You know, I am almost curious enough to let you do that. Almost, Drew give him leg function back but if he comes to attack me, shut down all leg function and bladder control.^_

_ )So if I managed to attack you while staying out here, you wouldn't have him do that?(_

_ ^Bourne, I will hit you with a format strike if you hit me with a biotic power.^_

_ )Fair enough.( _Something suddenly came through the open door and hit me in middle of the faceplate. _)Knife hilts don't count as biotic powers though. So if we're done with this little pissing match, I'm going to go do something a little more productive.( _There was the distinctive sound of a biotic charge out of the room.

_ ^You're going to masturbate aren't you?^_

_ )First off, _no_. Secondly,, how would that even be possible with this suit?...on second thought, I'm better off not knowing.( _He shut me out with that one.

"Hey, Ty and Tali. How's the water today?"

I turned and looked to see who it was. "Hey Ashley, I was actually just leaving."

**Bourne:**

I had to force myself not to punch every wall I saw, though my hands still clenched into fists. Being shut down like that was way too close to what Iron and Hero did with my body, even if the intention wasn't the same. I rounded a corner and saw an engineering hatch I remembered from my version. I popped it open and climbed inside, heading for one of the harder to get to areas near the front. I'd spent a lot of time there when I needed to be alone, and this was definitely a time for that.

_If you are curious, the first digit of Pi to be repeated-_

_ )I'm not curious in the slightest. In fact, if you're so interested in it, why don't you go see what the first one to be repeated 2 million times is. And don't worry about keeping up conversation with me, feel free to devote your full resources towards finding out.( _

_ I am sensing some resentment toward me. Have I done something wrong?_

_ )You want chronological or alphabetical order?( _

_ Alphabetical seems interesting._

_ )Listening to Ty. More specifically, shutting down various body parts on demand. And L comes before M, so don't give me crap about not being alphabetical.(_

_ I told you, I cannot say no to Ty. It's not my fault, Bourne._

_ )Cannot say no, or won't say no? You sure as hell don't put up much resistance.( _

_ I cannot say no in the same way that you cannot say no to your father._

_ )...I'm going to just let that one slide as metaphor. And every kid says no to their father about something at some point. I mean for crying out loud, Wrex _killed _his father!...Not that I'm saying that he's a good role model, I'm just pointing it out because its one of the few examples I know of personally.(_

_ Only personal examples can apply to this situation._

_ )Well, considering that the closest analogue I have to a father is my version of Saren, and I put a hole in his chest bigger than my head, I'd say the point is still valid.(_

_ Hero never would have disobeyed her father._

I stopped in the middle of climbing up a ladder. _)She's full paragon! I'm Paragade at best!(_

_ Well, we are full paragon then._

_ )Usually, paragons don't paralyze someone because their dad has a grudge with them. In fact, that'd be a case of morality trumping parental authority...argh, I need a better example. Would comparing Ty to a commanding officer be at least somewhat accurate?(_

_ No, a commanding officer did not create us._

I tried to facepalm, but of course only hit helmet. For a moment, I just climbed in silence, trying to think of how to convince Arnold to stop, or at least explain why he should. _)Okay, look. If Hero's father told her to deafen me, do you think she would? Or do you think she'd take the high road and say no way?(_

_ Depends, if that person threw them out of an elevator then she may._

I bit back the scream that comment would have otherwise elicited and finally crawled into the cavern I'd been looking for. It wasn't large enough to stand up in, but I could sit comfortably, even in armor.

_You know, it's very hypocritical to walk off and hide to be left alone but when Ty tries that you lost emotional control and refused to let him._

_ )First off, yeah, it is, and I admit that. I'm probably closer to 60 or 70 renegade with the other bit paragon. Secondly, it isn't exactly the same, because I actually wanted to talk to him about important shit while he's just being an idiot and wants to insult me some more. Close enough to be a hypocrite maybe, but not enough to keep me up at night.( _

_ You do realize that Ty has figured out how to fix most problems on the fly. When we were with Drew, he always kept to improvising. That is how he found most of his answers._

_ )Maybe he can make it work. I can't. I don't plan everything out in advance by any means, but I at least have an idea what I'm going to do, and then I adapt that plan to what happens. By the way, alone time is not meant to include you.(_

_ Fine, you are the lone wolf after all._

"Not because I want to be." I muttered aloud, trying to get my thoughts in order. "Whenever I lose control, people get hurt. And being around them makes it harder to keep control."

_Do you want consolation or am I supposed to be quiet?_

"If I did want consolation, it wouldn't be from you." I closed my eyes, and tried to just let my breathing even out. It was a calming technique I'd picked up from Hero, though I'd rarely gotten into a state like this, where I needed to use it.

_Except rarely isn't really accurate at this point. I've been on edge since...since I woke up on Eden Prime in this reality. Hell, who wouldn't be, confronted with someone as powerful as Ty? That enemy of my enemy thing sure as hell isn't making us into friends. _I considered that for a moment, trying to stay logical, and not let emotions get in the way. _He acts like he wants to be one moment, then does a complete 180._

I laughed harshly, eyes still closed. _Why does he want to be friends with someone like me anyway? He's right about me killing him I had to- and I've gotten to the point I wouldn't hesitate to do it. _I thought about it further. _The scary part is, it's not just him. Tali and Liara, maybe even Cecelia, if killing them was the only way to get back, I'd probably do it._ A chill went down my spine. _I might even kill this version of Ashley to get back to mine. _

If the room would have allowed for it, I'd have stood up and started pacing. _We have almost nothing in common. Maybe when I first started out, but not anymore. I've changed, adapted, matured...god, who am I trying to convince here? I might act it most of the time but I still threw him out of an elevator just because he pissed me off! And I'd do it again, if I could avoid going along for the ride. _

I shook my head. _I screwed up in plenty of ways, maybe even more than he did, but I still managed to stop Saren, stop Iron, and earn my rank and Spectre Status. Yet here, I've got no authority whatsoever- he trumps my own muscle control for fucks sake! _

_ On top of that, I've got a girlfriend I don't know, the girl I stabbed has a crush on me, my friend is a raving lunatic closer to my worst enemy, my dead friend is alive and walking around in her own body, and Iron is stronger than he's ever been! _I stood up, barely noticing the dent my head put in the ceiling as I started pacing. _I can deal with memory loss, or mercs, or even Reapers. But this drama? _I opened my faceplate so I could rub my temples. _It might have been better if I'd landed here in the same state I did the first time. I've got too much to compare it to. If I was just able to go along with it naturally, without knowing what I was doing, I'd be second guessing myself, but not as much as this! _

I looked at the trench I'd made in the ceiling. _If I could only guess what worked, it'd be just that, guessing. Here, I know what should work, but it won't. So anything I try to do reflects that bias. But it's not like I can afford to lose the memories, or want to. The whole point of doing this is so I can get back. If I don't know what I'd be going back to...It'd be no different than what I know about the real world. I'd end up wanting to stay here because I'd know what I was dealing with. And then Ashley and Raptor would just wait desperately, before someone finally shut down the life support and let me die. And if I died there, who knows what'd happen here?_

I slumped against a wall, not caring how it bent inwards as a result. _Before, I could at least make educated guesses as to what'd happen, minus a few exceptions. Here, I...I just don't know._

"Bourne?" I heard Ty call from the other side of the wall. "I saw the dent and know it's you."

I didn't bother replying, I just moved away with every bit of stealth I had, heading for a tunnel that would lead to another spot like this. My escape was quickly stopped as Ty stepped through a glitch right by the tunnel.

"There you are. Guess what I just did."

I crossed my arms pointedly, glaring at him. "Unless you figured out a way to get this stupid stuff off of me...Honestly, I don't think I care at this point."

Ty reached behind his back and pulled out a bottle of alcohol and two glasses. "Nope, I jacked some scotch out of Kaidan's private stash and thought there was nobody that it would be more fun to drink with than you."

He held out one of the glasses to me, though I didn't so much as look at it. "Ty, if you don't make it so I can get drunk, there's no point to me drinking that. And if you do-" I gestured to the wall where it was dented. "That was on accident while totally sober. And I didn't throw the wall out of an elevator earlier." I walked back over to the dent and slumped down again. "You know, I could have sworn I actually had some fun times the first time. This time, the most fun I've had was killing several people at once by setting them on fire. And I'm so jaded I'm not even as worried by that fact as I would have been a few months ago."

"Please, you have it easy compared to me." Ty said shaking his head and filling his glass.

"Let me put it bluntly: I don't want to hear what you're going to say, because the only options are either A: you'll be right, and this already rocky relationship will get worse, or B: We'll end up arguing about it and we'll come to blows yet again, which will doubtless end in my defeat under current conditions." I shook my head. "Or C: You'd be wrong, and nothing I'd say would convince you otherwise."

"Bourne, you can crush a man's skull with your bare hands. I can't break someone's arm without some upgraded armor. Yet, I am the one that everyone fears. Drew told me right when he could that he sensed that everyone this time around is more on their guard then last time."

I looked at the trench I'd made again. "Ty, I'm a super soldier, not superhuman. I might be able to do that with the armor, but without...the skull is pretty tough." I looked back at him. "And honestly, I'm not sure whether or not I'm surprised. It'd be easier for you to do the killing out here-" I pointed to my gun. "But it'd be me that would be able to do it-" I pointed at my head. "Up here. No hesitation whatsoever." I laughed harshly. "Just ask Nihlus. Or all those people I sent to save the Destiny Ascension."

Ty raised the glass to his lips and finished it all in one go."About that, I did some thinking about what I would do if we were forced to kill each other."  
I cut him off with a raised hand. "Arnold told me about your dream." I looked away. "And you know what, you're absolutely fucking right. I am the type of scum that would kill anyone to get what I need. You, Tali, Liara, Cecelia-" I threw a knife that lodged in the wall. "I'm not sure there's any paragon left in my meter anymore."

"That dream got me to think, and if we do end up in that scenario,_ I will let you kill me_."

My head whipped towards him in surprise. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out that was coherent. After a moment, I shook my head. "Something about not wanting to become what you hate?"

Ty shook his head and poured another glass. "Nope, I want to be sure I am still real when I get back home."

I thought about that for a moment. This time, my head shake was in sympathy. "Because you just would go back to the game. I get a real world to go back to." I sighed. "We both got fucked over pretty thoroughly, huh?"

He offered the glass again. "I wouldn't say that, we both get one hell of a story to write on some fan fiction site when we get back. Have a few laughs and enjoy a good game in a whole new way."

I pulled the glass over with my biotics, and turned my head so he wouldn't see my face as I drank it. "I'm not much of a writer, even I wanted to go back." I sent the glass back over to him. "That might be the biggest difference of all. For me…" I stopped, trying to think of how I could explain it so he'd understand. Or even if I wanted to explain it.

"Hey, if you want to stay here forever then fine by me. But if by some chance you do get out, you should hit up my place in Moscow, Idaho. I guarantee it will be a good time."

I looked at him pointedly, though with the mask closed it was hard to tell. "Ty...let me put it this way. Unless going back restored my memories of the real world and wiped my current ones clean, I would never want to do it. Even then, unless it was that or death...still no guarantee I'd do it." I leaned against the wall. "Raptor...Ashley…" I trailed off and grabbed the bottle with my powers, pouring it into my glass and bringing the drink back to me. "I know it might sound pathetic, and maybe like I'm repeating myself but the truth is, they're my family now. And I couldn't leave them any more than I could give up the biotics or anything else." I raised the glass mockingly and downed it in one go.

"By the way, I did code the drink for your super liver. Anyway, if you say you don't want to go back the universe is going to send you back. Just think of how your universe seems to do the opposite of what you want."

I shook my head. "Not how it works. It reacts to me, and makes events flow as closely as possible. Me being there shook things up enough it needs me around to resolve them." I looked at the empty glass. "Could just be my ego talking, but it makes sense."

"Okay, maybe it's just mine. Then again, if it does that, I will let it all go and tear the cyber world a new one. Maybe I will tear it apart till I reach your place and chill with you and this Raptor chick. She looked pretty cute from your memories."

"You're not her type. Unless you're just a chick with short hair and a deep voice."

"She romanced Liara, give her one more game and see if she breaks that bond with Thane or Garrus or Jacob. Lord only knows that very few times will a Mass Effect player stay with their romance from the first game. Especially when Liara goes heartless, know-it-all bitch Shadowbroker."

"Shade did when he romanced her. Also, Garrus is taken, and in most of my playthroughs, I sent Jacob as the tech expert so he'd take a rocket to the face, so I'm doubting any Shepard I created would go after him."

"That's cold bro, and a lot can happen in two years. For all you know, Garrus could break it off with Tali before he goes to Omega."

"I'm just buzzed enough to say I once caught Shepard walking out of the medbay with her hair in a wreck and purple lipstick all over her face. Those two are pretty much married at this point."

"So, she is going to die and Liara will mourn her. Then, when she comes back, Liara will say she won't be able to deal with losing Shepard twice and break it off. And who can blame her, it's hard to lose someone once. Twice, I just can't imagine twice."

"You're not saying anything I haven't told myself already. I'm enough of a pessimist with everything else. I try to be optimistic about at least that one thing." My face darkened. "I don't even want to consider Horizon."

"Bah, you will get over her. Trust me, I had two more years then you will and can honestly say you will get over it. You might latch on to the first girl that catches your eye, hell I did that with Tali, but you will get over it. Maybe you can get Kasumi."

I'd been ready to punch him, but that last bit made me laugh instead. "She'd keep me on my toes, that's for sure. If I ever get her mind away from Jacob." I shook my head. "But every time I looked at her...perfect memory can be a real bitch sometimes."

"Just do a lot of sit ups with your shirt off. That's what she likes. Speaking of exercise, how excited are you to chill with James Vega."

"I've already got a six pack under this thing, just from genetics. And let me put it this way- I'm hoping he chooses to "dance while he talks" with me instead of Raptor. And I'll be using all the interrupts."

He waved me off. "Please, James is cool. He's one of those guys that has your back, even when you screwed up because he knows what it's like to screw up."

"Yeah, I think Raptor has that covered." I sent the glass back over to him so he could fill it.

"Yeah, but she is a girl. Sometimes you need dude friends. Especially you, just one girl friend, and your girlfriend. I'm surprised you haven't died of estrogen poisoning."

I shrugged. "Everyone else on the Normandy either didn't trust me, or was afraid I'd stab them if they looked at me funny."I chuckled. "Raptor would always tell them I was the one to complain to, just so they'd be too scared to do it."

He laughed again. "So you were PMSing for your entire trip."

"Hey, if we'd ended up with another paragon Shepard, I'd be bad cop here too. But since Cecelia beats me by a lightyear and a half in that department- speaking of which, what's the deal with you two?"

Ty scratched his helmet. "Uh, what?"

"Dude, you asked for 'another breath' and she gave you one. Then you full on kissed her, and she didn't kill you...also, when she was drunk after you tazed Garrus, right on the mouth and made you blurt everything out." I smiled. "I'd say we know who that other female your gland was acting up about."

Looking down, I caught him scratching at the floor. "No, no, I'm not. I can't. That was just harmless flirting we… I can't let this happen."

"Why not? At least if she's crazy, she's hot crazy. Like Jack, but without the tattoos or biotics to kill you with." I hiccuped. "That might be more convincing if I were sober enough to say that differently."

"No, I can't let this happen. If I do, we lose."

"Didn't stop me from winning. Why would it stop you?" I stopped a moment as something else hit me. "And I'm not like, super into anyone like you were in your version. Maybe that didn't carry over."

"If I take the chance and it works. I will be limited. Goodbye repair program, goodbye alcohol hacks, and goodbye money."

"Why do you seem to think women are the root of all evil? I mean, yeah, some are, but why all of them?"

"Cause everything that's bad that has happened to me has been because of women."

"I think you're being overdramatic."

"I was literally limited because of my relationship with Tali, I got stuck in this game because of my ex, and every time I get close to a girl they lose faith in me causing me to lose my sparkling sense of humor for a brooding, selfish, and pessimistic attitude that would make Bruce Wayne cringe. I am not being over dramatic, I am simply learning from my past mistakes."

I chuckled. "Maybe you play for the same team as Raptor."

"What chu' talkin' 'bout Jason?"

I rolled my eyes. "Well, you think girls are evil, and love hanging out with only guys...you know, Washington Legalized-"

"I will go into your code at night and turn you into a girl if you finish that sentence with Gay marriage."

"What makes you think I wasn't going to say marijuana?" I asked with a chuckle.

"Maybe I should drive over to Pullman once I get back and smoke some while at the Cougars game. Used to love watching them with my dad. Wonder if he got season tickets this year?"

"...Could you actually change me into a chick?"

"I remember this one time, I got to go on the field and ride around on the back of Butch's scooter. Best day ever, funny how I am having the worst day ever and falling back on a day when I was six."

"Least you can do that. But seriously, that's actually possible and not just an idle threat?"

"To ride around with Butch? Yeah, everyone gets to do it once when they are a Junior Cougar."

"Are you deliberately avoiding the question, or are you just too drunk to hear it?...damn, I think I'm sobering up, hit me again." I sent the glass back towards him.

He poured another glass. "Well, I have located the code for gender before. Never thought of doing it though."

"I would suggest using it on Cecelia to solve the problem, but she'd kill you if you did, and you'd use your powers on me if I suggested it. Good, this stuff's working after all.."

"Are you kidding? I ain't changing that body into a guy's."

I shook my head. "Look, there's a good chance we're on a collision course with the grave anyway. Might as well have some fun along the way...and I cannot believe I actually said those words aloud to you."

Ty laid back and put his hands behind his head. "You know, it might be a good idea to just chill in here until we get to Feros. No Shepard, no Hero, and no problems."

"Present company accepted." I pointed to my head. "Your 'son' wouldn't know youthful rebellion if it hit him in the...mass of bugs I guess."

"You saying I'm a problem?"

"I was talking about the other voice in my head."

Ty took a deep breath and looked like he was extremely relaxed. "Ah, leave him alone. I promise that I won't have him shut down any more of your systems… unless the situation actually calls for it."

"I'm not quite drunk enough to be reassured by that." I slid down until I was sitting and leaning against the wall. "But maybe if we finish off the bottle, that'll change."

_Your heart rate was slightly elevated when you said that._

"You sure you don't have a way to get him off of me?"

Ty didn't make a sound and just lied there. He looked like he wouldn't more for anything. then, something happened that got him to sit up.

"What the hell are you two doing in here?"

**Shepard:**

Both men- though she used that term loosely- were sitting in the middle of the tunnels, glasses in hand, and judging from the half empty bottle, were probably wasted. Not to mention the various dents and scratches.

They exchanged a look. "Bonding." Bourne said, half sarcastically. "No girls aloud though, so we're going to have to ask you to leave." There was a muffled sound that might have been a hiccup.

"So, Bourne, who would you rather take to bed? Liara or Samara?" Ty asked trying to sit upright.

"They're both old enough to be my great grandmother."

Shepard put her hands on her hips, and gave them her patented death glare. "Is this seriously what you are doing?"

"Bourne, you have to pick one. Shepard, yes this is what we are doing."

"Meh, not really into asari much anyway. The scales, and the mind thing...Look but don't touch for me."

"Did I give you permission to be up here?"

"Nope." Bourne said with a hiccup. "And neither of us care."

"Bourne, you have to pick one or you can make out with Wrex for an hour."

"I'm drunk, but not that drunk. I dunno, I guess Liara. Not really into older women….relatively speaking."

Ty nodded and then looked over at her. "How about you Shepard? Garrus or Wrex?"

Bourne burst out laughing at that, despite her shifting the glare to him. "I'm out of here."

"You can't leave unless you answer it." Ty called. "Bourne, can you put a wall behind her so she can't leave?"

He sarcastically saluted him, and when Shepard looked, there was in fact a wall of green biotic energy behind her.

"Alright, but I think I already know the answer." He pointed right at Ty.

"Garrus", She said quickly, "I would take Garrus."

Ty pointed at Bourne. "Your turn Bourne. Ask away."

"Miranda or Hero?" He blurted out, laughing.

"Girl in a catsuit or armored woman who wouldn't give me the time of day? I will take Miranda any day."

"So, does that go back to you, or is she joining in?"

Shepard looked down the tunnel and saw that the wall was gone but despite her better judgement she crawled in and sat down by them. "Shoot Bourne."

"I'm running out of people I know." He said, putting his hand on his chin. "What the hell, Me, or Alenko?"

Shepard's eyes moved back to the tunnel but she kept her place. "Alenko, I probably could get him to do whatever I want."

"He does have biotics you know." Bourne chuckled. "God, I'm at the wrong level of drunk, between not enough and too much. Ty, be a pal and pour me another glass?"

Ty took his glasses and poured out two glasses. One into the glass and the other on the floor. "Here you go."

He pulled it back with his biotics, which was surprising to Shepard, since she doubted he could walk a straight line.

Shepard cut in before someone could stop her. "Okay, it's my turn. Bourne, Me or Hero?"

"We really need to get out more and meet other people." He commented. "She's practically my sister or something, so I guess I'd go with you."

"You gonna kiss him now or something?"

"What's the *hic* matter Ty? *hic* Jealous?"

Ty shook his head but ended up disorienting himself and falling over. "I am just going to lay here and hope I die soon."

"Just turn on the healing thing until you're less ready to die and then we can get back to it."

"Yeah, Ty, it's my turn to ask you. Tali or Ashley?"

"Ashley, I would wreck her if given the chance." He flinched as a knife embedded itself in the floor an inch from his face.

"Darn, guess I'm not drunk enough to miss yet." Bourne commented, raising his half full glass to his lips.

Ty smiled and brought the bottle up and began chugging it.

"Meh, we can always get more." Bourne said with a half shrug. "Your turn, ain't it?"

"Indeed it is", he said. "Where do you want to be when the Reapers come?"

"Somewhere with a big fucking gun and lots of ammo…or a bar. Whichever is closer."

Shepard thought to herself about the question. Sure, they were too drunk to remember her answer but for some reason it meant a lot to her. "I want to be near the brunt of their attack so I can save as many lives as possible."

"Like I said, big gun and lots of ammo." Bourne shook his head. "Sad truth is, can't save everyone from things like those ugly squids."

_ Squids? _Shepard thought to herself. _How would he know what they look like?_

Ty sat up with a heroic posture. "Speak for yourself. I would rip apart the heavens themselves and fight the Reapers head on… If the universe was in my favor and somebody wasn't holding me back."

"Yeah, saving your ass from getting squashed by a boulder really got in the way of that, huh?" He hiccuped."Your turn Shepard."

"Okay, where do you-" Shepard was cut off as the ship made a crunching noise.

"What was that?" Bourne asked, bolting upright.

"Uh, Commander, we just ran into a ship that was blocking the relay. We sustained no hull damage but it looks like they are leaking atmosphere."

"Oh, shit. Ty, Jason, go get some of the sober juice from Chakwas. We need to get on that ship fast."

Bourne sprung to his feet, denting the ceiling as his head hit it. "Agreed. Ty, you in shape to portal us there?"

Ty grabbed Bourne. "Right this way."

With that, they stepped into a wall and were out of her view. She immediately began cursing herself for not catching a ride and turned to the tunnel she'd come out of.

**(...Uh, what just happened?)**

**^We got drunk.^**

**(Oh... I thought you drunk got cause T117 screwed up the title.)**

**S7: Will you just shut up.**

**(Hmm...ah, what the hell, just for something different I will.)**

**S7: Finally, so, what's the first order of business?**

**T117: Uh...well, I thought the plan was to wait till 25 to do questions, so...I don't know. Usually these things are kinda just us arguing. Or our characters arguing.**

**S7: Well, then what are we going to argue about?**

***Do you guys always have to argue instead of agreeing?***

**T117:...Pretty much, yeah. **

**S7: There was that one time.**

**T117: When was that, when we both agreed the original ending sucked but that the DLC ending was a major improvement?**

***I was thinking more that you could say something about-* **N7pro has been logged off by host because she being a complete goody two shoes.

**S7: We agree that Jacob is just a token black guy.**

**T117: Yeah...there is so much lampshade hanging from Bourne on his 'effectiveness' in combat. **

**)If you don't know what the LH thing means, check tv tropes.(**

**S7: Honestly, it kinda sucks because he could have been a good character or at least the same level of Kaidan if he had a little more work put into him. Less duchy outfit, not as racist looking face, some other unfinished business besides daddy issues.**

**T117: Then they made him the only LI that...yeah, they just screwed up all the way around. **

**S7: Okay, here is a question. If you could bring in any of the Final Fantasy summons to help Bourne, what would it be and where would it have been in SiaWoF?**

**T117:...Uh...I've never actually played those games, so I have no idea what any of them would even be.**

**^I'd have wanted Bahamut when I was facing down the Geth Colossus.^**

**)Yeah...If i was going to go with a weapon or spell or whatever from outside the ME franchise…I think I'd have to go with just some good old lightning from the palms, be it Fable style or from the Dark Side.(**

**^Lame!^^**

**)What? Shields are biotics' weakness, lightning would kill those. And also pretty much kill anything else.(**

**^Yeah, but you referenced Fable and everyone hates that franchise now. So, thanks Iron, you just discredited this entire author's notes.^**

**)I meant Fable 2. That's the best one.(**

**^Okay, I'll give you that one. Plus, the addition of black-powder weapons was awesome.^**

**)DLC was pretty cool too. Particularly the stuff for pre ordering so you could walk around as a Spartan, complete with an energy sword thing.(**

**S7: Yeah, Fable 2 had it going for it. You know, I really hate to say a game has been casualized because I don't believe that the creation of universal gaming controls would be that bad and that is what a lot of people say that casualization is but it's actually the over simplifying of a game to the point that the original game does not exist. Fable 3 did just that.**

**T117: It's more the fact that...I can't even find a spot to start, and I'd just end up ranting if allowed to continue, so time to change the subject.**

**S7: Who would win in a fight, Han Solo or Indiana Jones.**

**)Uh, space laser gun vs bullets. Han shoots first and wins.(**

**S7: Technically, Indy also shoots first. Under that logic, they shoot at the same speed thus it is actually bullet speed that would figure who wins and since a bullet is faster than a laser. Indy takes the Idol, the girl and the win.**

**T117: Uh...lasers by definition move at the speed of light. I think that's a _bit _faster than a bullet.**

**S7: While that is true, you can watch the lazers go across the screen, you can't watch a bullet unless there is time distortion.**

**T117: A bullet's...blur, for lack of a better word, isn't as visible as a glowing red or green or whatever blast of light. Han's also younger.**

**(Here is the real reason Han is better. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.)**

**)Ugh( *Worst movie in the series.***

**^We will see how you are talking after Star Wars 7 since Han is returning.^**

**T117: Yeah...this is one of those movies I know I'm going to end up going to see, even though I bet I'll end up being disappointed.**

**(Can't be worse than Phantom Menace.)**

**S7: lets agree that if JJ Abrams fails at this we will call him Jar Jar Abrams.**

**T117: Heh, agreed. **

**^Tis' the ultimate sign of failure to be nicknamed for the most hated character of all time.^**

**(I think there's got to be at least one fictional character people hate more. Like the 'godzilla' from the 2001 movie or whenever.)**

**S7: That one actually is a cannon Godzilla monster named just Zilla. He got his ass kicked in Godzilla: Final Wars when he got bitchslapped into the Sydney opera house and blown up.**

**T117: I will admit I have never actually seen a Godzilla film in my life, but I really want to see this new one.**

**S7: Seriously, it's like every time you admit you haven't seen a movie, it's like you are trying to get me to hate you.**

**(He also still hasn't seen Back to the Future.)**

**T117:...That is true.**

**S7: I know that. And I have forgiven you for your committing a sin worse than murder. but I expect you to atone for it by watching the movies.**

**T117: Eventually. Maybe. I've got a long list of movies to catch up on. Which, were I to tell you the contents, would likely make you wish to end this partnership.**

**(Like Rocky, Rambo, and...he's debating whether he wants to see Frozen, cause he's heard differing opinions on it.) **

**S7: GO SEE FROZEN NOW!**

**T117: Yeah, that's the thing...is that still in theatres? I could've sworn it was, but I saw it on DVD at Safeway the other day.**

**S7: Nope, I got the blu-ray when it came out yesterday.**

**T117: Huh. Well I just looked, and the theater closest to me is still playing it. **

**S7: Yeah, it's good enough that it can stay in theaters even after the movie comes out.**

**T117: Yeah, let me put it this way. I only now got the cash saved up to buy Thor The Dark World on Itunes. So it's probably going to be a while before I see that film.**

**S7: Get a job hippie.**

**T117: Gee, you haven't said that to me a billion times on Live before. Mind your own with that. **

**S7: Pft, it's my first reaction when someone bitches about money.**

**T117: Whatever. Anyway, there's got to be at least one film I've seen that you haven't that'd make me want to shake you.**

**S7: Nope, I spent a year of college in video classes watching and making movies. It was literally part of studying for me to sit down and watch movies as soon as I got home.**

**)I think books would be more likely than movies as far as Spike not knowing them goes.(**

**T117: I am kinda a bookworm. And I read pretty fast most of the time.**

**S7: I read the Divine Comedy, The Iliad, the Odyssey, and Pride and Prejudice in two days.**

***Why do you keep trying to find something you're better at than him? He just keeps showing you up every time.***

**T117: Oh shut up Hero. **

**S7: Eh, I'm kinda one of those guys who has done a ton of shit because of my parents in high school. Hell, I rode a bull for eight seconds in a charity event. Fucking scariest thing in my life.**

**(Really? I'd think looking in the mirror would be the scariest thing in your life.)**

**S7: Iron, everyone doesn't look like you.**

**(Bourne does.)**

**^Tell me Iron, did that sting? Because you got burned.^**

**(...Nah, not really. There is this little pinching sensation in my thigh from earlier when Bourne stabbed me cause I was trying to change his status on facebook to- Oww! Now he got my other leg!)**

**^Do my powers carry over to real life?^**

**S7: I'll allow it for ten seconds.**

**^Good, Iron, I just permanently made it so your facebook status says that you are looking for a man to love.^**

**(...Sweet! Now I can take so many guys to secluded areas and murder them! Thanks! Way easier than having to track them down myself!)**

**^Wait, you hunt down gays and kill them… Trebor, you are scaring me.^**

**(It's not just gays! It's pretty much anyone I can find. Guys, gals, herms, latinos, asians, white guys, black guys...you get the point. If they've got a pulse, I'll take the time to make sure that pulse stops.)**

**T117:...Okay...now _I'm _a little scared here. **

**(On the bright side, if they ever do some sorta ammature 'submit a script' contest type deal and in involves the Joker, you're ashooing to win.)**

**S7: Um… 1473I2**

**T117: Yeah, I'm with you. Sayonara.**


	25. I Really Hate You

**Ty:**

I clicked my grenade belt's fasten and finished replacing all my guns. Luckily, I had Cecelia grab me some of the spectre weapons so I was completely decked out. Completely ready for whatever Danny or the AI or the universe had to throw at me.

There was a ding behind me and I could only assume that it was Bourne finally sobered up and was getting off the elevator. "So, you ready for this?"

"I'm ready to get my bottle of scotch back."

I looked back and saw Kaidan. "Hey, how's the head stuff going buddy?"

"Fine", he stepped up to his locker and opened it. "Shepard wanted me to get ready and go with you guys."

Closing my locker, I opened my mask and grinned. "Sweet, good to see you finally coming with us."

Kaidan nodded and grabbed his gear quickly. "Yeah, she hasn't seemed too happy with me since we left the Citadel."

I leaned against the locker and began screwing around with a grenade. "Why is that?"

"I just questioned her orders for a second. Just a second. Now she really hates me."

"That doesn't seem like her, usually you have to screw up twice." I raised my eyebrow and knew he wasn't giving me the whole truth.

"Alright, maybe I told her that I kind of love her before then."

I waited a minute thinking that at any moment he would laugh and say he was joking but he just looked down at his feet and looked regretful. "Uh, dude, ever heard the term 'trying too hard'?"

Kaiden placed the rest of his armor on and grabbed out his pistol. "Yeah, yeah, I definitely was. At the time I just wanted her."

"Hehehe, you know I am probably the last person you want to be talking to about this stuff."

He gave me a confused look. "Because?"

"I'm praying that my feelings for her go away, not that she will return them."

"What", his eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. "How can you say that? We have all seen the chemistry you two have."

"Because I have my own reasons, and don't plan to stick around for long." I looked at the grenade and saw that my thumb was hovering over the button to activate it. Luckily, I caught myself and stashed the grenade.

"So, what? You are just going to help us beat Saren and take off?" Kaidan was surprised by what I said.

"Yeah, I have my own demons to defeat. Sure, I will help you with yours but in the end I can't go home till I take my own down."

Bourne's voice cut him off, "I swear, at this point, I'm going to just wait until you're too weak to portal out, then lock you both in a room until you kill each other or just bang...You know, I was wondering how that sobering up thing would work with my resistance to chemicals, and I think that right there was the answer." A knife embedded itself between my feet, then Kaidan's. "But since I can still do that, I don't care."

I sat up and began walking to the elevator. "Well, I'm going to grab one of the meals for the mission. I haven't eaten yet."

"What, you don't like a morning workout before breakfast?" Bourne said with a chuckle as he walked into the elevator a bit behind me, storing his guns on his back as he did so.

"Dude, I have been shot, held onto a moving car, fell out of the sky and died temporarily. I am sure that I have had my workout."

Kaidan ran in behind us. "Wait up, I got my stuff and might as well catch the lift."

"At least this thing isn't as slow as it used to be." Bourne commented. "That's your doing, right Ty?"

I nodded, "Yep, I am awesome enough to speed up an elevator."

"Any way you can make it an omni-tool app? If I do end up with another ship like the one before, that one will just be unbearable now."

"Sorry, doesn't work like that." I hit the button and the elevator began to rise.

"Meh, it was worth a try." He said with a shrug. "Blame the alcohol."

"Are you sober yet?"

"Yes and no. According to the governator, my body reroutes it to part that controls speech. So while I can do a back handspring with my eyes closed, every other sentence I sound totally wasted...Also, no hangover somehow, which is awesome."

"You probably have an overcharged amp." As soon as Kaidan pointed it out, it seemed like the best answer.

"I've only gotten one once after 20 drinks that were 98 percent alcohol, so probably. So, anything we know about this shuttle?"

"Other than the fact that we crashed into it, not much." Kaidan said with a shrug.

The elevator finished its routine and made the ding sound, signalling it was on the top floor. "Sweet, lets get some eats."

The door opened and Shepard saw us as she walked by. "Oh, good, you are ready. Let's get up there quick before they lose all their air and die."

Bourne stopped suddenly. "Uh, something just occured to me. Do these things seal for vacuum? I mean, if they can't handle a little water...wait, how does that work?...Screw it, I'll take your word for it now and maybe get you to explain it later when I'm more in the mood to care."

"Water applies pressure, vacuum is the absence of pressure. These suits can handle the absence of pressure, I am sure."

"Then lets get over there." He looked around. "You know, a less experienced person might question why we're bringing weapons for a rescue mission like this. Me, I'm just making bets with Mr. Governator on how long fore we have to use em."

I took off out of the elevator and ran over to the cafeteria grabbing a biotic portion for the road. Acting fast, I tore it open and began eating everything. This one had two bologna sandwiches, some pudding, three sticks of celery and an apple.

I grabbed out the two sandwiches first and stacked them on top of each other and began eating. _Ty, your method of consumption is dangerous and can lead to cramping. We suggest you slow down._

I would have told him to shut up but my mouth was full and I couldn't stop. After the sandwiches, I ate the celery at once and finished it quickly. Following that, I drank the pudding down and moved to the apple.

"Hey, Ty, according to Sir Governator, you're really likely to get a cramp if you eat that fast."

I took one bite of the apple and swallowed it. "I'll be fine, Drew is just mad that I am making him work in overdrive."

"Work in overdrive?"

"Yeah", I took another bite, "He will have to make me digest it faster so that I don't but I don't care. I am hungry."

The apple was suddenly glowing green, and flying into Bourne's hand. "Not the usual breakfast, but it'll do."

I let go of the bag since it was full of trash and smacked out the apple out of his hand and into mine. "I guess it won't do, because this is mine." I quickly licked around the entire apple to make sure he wouldn't take it.

"In case you can't tell, I'm rolling my eyes behind this thing."

"In case you can't tell, I don't care." I took another bite of the apple and ran over to the airlock. "Hey, sexy, ready to go to the party?"

_)Seriously. Room. Locked. No way out.(_

Shepard looked up from her pad. "Yeah, I'm just checking where the leak has gotten to. Looks like it is just in the rear."

"You know, I seem to recall someone saying Joker was the best pilot in the fleet. So how'd he managed to run right into another ship?" Bourne said with a chuckle. "Also, we taking anyone else over, or just the four of us?"

"Ashley is coming too. I sent her to grab one of my new grenade mods I programmed."

_^You know, maybe someone should lock you and her into a room together. Since you haven't made an effort to talk to her since the bar.^_

_ )Did you miss the part where I look like a zombie that got assimilated into the Borg?(_

_ ^... Wait, you call me a nerd and yet you are the one watching Star Trek?^_

_ )It was the only good example of a cyborg I could think of off the top of my head.(_

_ ^Sure^, _I looked to the stairs entrance. "Looks like Ashley's here. So, are we going over in droves or all at once?"

Bourne shrugged. "Either way, you and I oughta be in back. Face mask or not, these suits are more 'we're here to kill you' looking then 'we're here to rescue you' looking."

I closed my facemask. "I can go in the first wave. I'll just stand in back."

Cecelia nodded. "Alright, you, me and Alenko will go over first. Bourne, Ashley, you're second wave."

They both nodded in response. _)You make any smart remarks, and breakfast will be on the floor, along with a lot of your blood.(_

_ ^I just realized I never told Arnold not to shut you down if you try to attack me.^ _I stepped into the airlock. "Let's go."

)_You said if I came into the showers and attacked you, he should shut me down, and if I used biotics, you'd hit me with a format thing. Never said anything about other circumstances.( _He was smart enough to shut me out before I could.

Cecelia and Kaidan stepped into the airlock with me and she hit the button for transfer. We had to wait for the long pause and get scanned for a couple minutes before the transfer opened.

Shepard drew her pistol and stepped into the next lock. "You know Ty, next time you get a free minute, I'd appreciate it if you could speed this process up like you did the elevators."

"You can add that to the things that everyone wants me to do list. But the thing is so long, I doubt I will get to it."

We stepped into the next airlock and another transfer sequence began. It was shorter since we already went through one. The next doors opened and we were greeted by a man holding a rifle aimed at us.

My hands moved faster than my brain and I shoved the apple on the barrel of his gun.

He looked at it in surprise for a moment before Shepard yanked it out of his hands. "Do yourself a favor- don't be dumb enough to try that again."

**Shepard:**

She examined the weapon for a moment before handing it to Ty. "Short version: your ship is leaking atmosphere, we're here to save your asses."

The man looked at Ty for a second and then backed away slowly. "No, not with him."

She rolled her eyes. "If you'd rather stay here and die, then get out of our way so we can help the smarter people. Natural selection in action."

The man turned around and took off running screaming, "Patient zero is here!"

"...Can someone explain to me what just happened?" Kaidan asked, scratching his head.

Ty shrugged. "Beats me. I just work here."

She opened her mouth to say something, but then noticed something on the wall across from the airlock. She walked over to it to get a closer look. It looked like a distorted hexagon with a slit in the bottom, with two smaller arms on each side. "Either of you seen this symbol before?" She asked, turning back to the men.

"Looks like Cerberus." Ty answered after a moment.

"Hades' dog from in greek mythology?"

Ty nodded. "Yep, but this is the symbol for a human forwarding group. By the way, you know greek mythology?"

She looked at the symbol with some distaste. "How exactly do you know this group? It sounded like he recognized you...though I don't know how he could, in armor like that."

He shrugged. "Run ins here and there. But seriously, you know Greek mythology?"

She thought for a moment, considering. A group like this wasn't one she really wanted to rescue.

"What would they be doing out here?" Alenko asked after a moment. "And what did he mean Patient Zero?" He looked at the armor a moment before backing away slightly.

Ty looked at him. "What, do you find a woman who knows her mythology repulsive? I think it is the sexiest thing ever. I love the Iliad, it's my favorite story."

"If Aphrodite is done with you," Shepard commented, trying to hide her surprise, "Let's find out what they're doing out here, and if anyone else actually wants to be rescued." She looked at the two doors on each side of them, leading to the opposite sides of the ship. "I say we go right, and let the other two take the left."

"We should probably tell them that then." Kaidan agreed, already walking towards the door.

"Alright", Ty grabbed his apple off the top of the gun and continued eating it. "I'm curious about this patient zero thing."

"You're sure that thing isn't contagious, right?" She asked as she brought up the com. "Bourne, Williams you there?"

"Almost." Ashley replied.

"We're going to take the starboard side of the ship. You and Bourne get port."

"We just making sure people don't get left behind or what?" The latter's voice cut in. "Also, Hero has apparently decided to come with us."

"Who?"

Hannah's voice broke in. "I thought you weren't going to use that nickname anymore?"

"You volunteered for a rescue mission first thing in the morning. Don't tell me that it doesn't fit right now."

Cecelia shook her head. "Hey quick question, you said you were in a nanite program with Ty right?"

"...Similar program, not quite the same. Why?"

"These Cerberus guys called Ty patient zero. Know anything about that?"

There was a brief silence on his end. "Cerberus? As in that dog that guarded the underworld for Hades? Which inspired the name for a crazy prohuman terrorist group?"

"That one."

"...you sure it's them?"

"Octagonal orange and black symbol?"

There was the distinct sound of metal bending on the other side of the door. "What the hell are they doing here?"

"I don't know, you tell me."

"...where'd the patient zero thing come in? Did someone say that before attacking or something?"

"The guy was looking scared at Ty. Then he ran off screaming 'It's patient zero!' Any idea why?"

"I'm an amnesiac, remember?...I know them by reputation, and one run in a while back. Let's just say I'm glad I was getting paid to kill them and not capture them, because they deserved the former a lot more."

She shrugged. "Okay, well, we are going to check this out."

"Where do you need us skipper?" Ashley broke in.

"We're taking the starboard side of the ship. You take your team on the port side. And see if you can find out what they're doing here. Rescuing them just became a secondary objective."

"...Roger that."

"And this is exactly why I didn't question us bringing weapons." Bourne commented.

Shepard pulled up her rifle and gave Kaidan the signal to open the door. All three of them rushed in with their guns ready and found three scientists cowering in fear at at the other end of the room. Ty started walking ahead but all the scientist began screaming and huddled closer together.

"Uh, maybe I should stay back here."

Shepard stored her rifle and grabbed her pistol instead. "Would one of you like to explain why you're so terrified of him? And what you're doing out here?" She pointed the pistol at the head of the one in the middle. "That wasn't a choice by the way."

"He's patient zero."

"Yeah, I gathered that from the last time you said it. What does that mean, and why are a bunch of pro human terrorists out here?"

The woman in the center stepped out from the group. "Okay, look, we were on our way to a base when our engines went out and we lost power."

"That would explain why Joker didn't catch them on radar as we approached." Kaidan commented.

Ty walked forward but the woman stepped back. "Why am I patient zero?"

One of the men behind the woman screamed. "He still has the voice!"

"Normally this is the type of thing I might find funny, but it's just annoying right now." Bourne's voice made Shepard spin around. "You know, if you're going to be so damn quiet when you walk, whistle or something so I don't shoot you on instinct!"

He stepped past her to look at the group, or maybe glare at them. "Hmm, no obvious signs of injury. Are you just that good at being bad cop now you don't even have to hit them?"

"Didn't she tell you to go with Chief Williams?" Alenko said with disapproval.

He waved him off. "Hannah's more than capable of backing her up while we-" He raised a hand, glowing with green biotic energy. "Ask them a few _questions_."

"Patient Zero, nicknamed for the zero that the corrupted nanites in his body formed. Or at least, whatever is actually left of his real body." The woman began to look at Ty with more scorn than fear.

"Um, okay, that's not why I have the zero."

"I just figured you were part of a sports team." Bourne said with a dark chuckle as he started walking towards them. "Now, I realize it's early to be saying this, but I've had a long day, so if you don't start making sense-" There was a faint hiss, and several of them turned green at the sight of his now revealed face. "You're going to be envying my appearance."

"Patient Zero, or as he probably calls himself Ty, was one of our projects that went horribly right. We wanted to create a human that could control nanites and we did. In fact, we did it so well that he was able to feel a need for revenge. He ended up clearing an entire base of us by having the nanites turn the people there into jelly."

They looked at them for a moment before Bourne closed his helmet and turning back to Shepard. "Are we sure these guys aren't just high on red sand or something?"

"I can turn people into jelly?" Ty seemed to find his voice again.

The lady grabbed her pistol off her side and shot Ty right in the chest. "Yes, and you turned my husband into it."

The pistol suddenly flew out of her hands and into Bourne's. "Anyone else want to try that?" He switched it to his left hand and grabbed his own pistol with the other. "Please say yes, because I really want to shoot you racist bastards anyway and doing it that way would make it much more satisfying."

Shepard looked over at Ty, "Are you okay?"

"He should be, he has no chest cavity." The woman winced as a bullet hit the wall next to her head.

"I've got considerable evidence to the contrary." Bourne said, spinning his guns around on his fingers for a moment before pointing them at her chest. "Care to have me check you for one?"

Ty stepped past Bourne and up to the woman. "You just shot me."

The girl looked at him in horror as he slammed his fist into her chest and surrounded her with nanites. "What are you doing?"

"Just rewriting your genetic structure so that your stomach acid doesn't hold in your stomach and slowly eats your body away. And without any saliva, you will really feel the full force of the acid."The scariest part of Ty's words was that he was so calm.

He was suddenly yanked backwards, glowing green. "If I were you, I'd try apologizing and maybe he would undo it." Bourne commented. "Or at the very least, I might just shoot you in the head and put you out of your misery."

She seemed to be gritting her teeth, and Shepard suddenly heard a faint beeping coming from the women. The other two dived out of the way and Bourne threw up a barrier as her head literally exploded in a geyser of blood.

"...That might have been a little far Ty." Kaidan said, voice a little shaky for obvious reasons.

"That was an ocular flashbang." Bourne said, looking at the other two. "And I'd bet they've got them too."

Ty moved quick and grabbed them by their shoulders and they were covered in nanites for a second. "Now they don't."

"Good. Easier than having to rip them out." Bourne walked over to them.

"Holy shit, 24 too?" One of them said in disbelief, making the biotic pause in his tracks, and look down at the Omega symbol on his chest.

Ty grabbed both of them and reached into their pockets. "I got two OSDs here. I'm guessing one of them has information on us… just in case you want to finish them off quick."

Shepard bit her lip, finding Ty's sudden brutality a bit attractive.

"Quick was the opposite of what I had in mind." Bourne's omni-tool appeared around his hand, and suddenly formed a flaming stabbing implement. "Got a coin to flip for who gets who?"

Shepard took two shots and both the scientists dropped dead. "I get the kills. Let's get back on the Normandy and head to Feros."

Hannah's voice suddenly came over the com. "Cecelia, Bourne, you there?"

The Biotic raised his hand to his com as he angrily spun away from the corpses. "Yeah. You find something?"

"Yeah, an entire fucking army of these guys. Phantoms, Guardians, even a few Dragoons. We're pinned down, and one of them got Ashley in the leg. We need backup five minutes ago!"

"Good. Maybe this time I'll get to kill them before someone else does it for me." He almost growled as he sprinted through the door- literally through it, not waiting for it to open.

Ty pointed at the door. "Um, overkill?"

Cecelia nodded and pointed ahead. "Use your teleport thing and catch up to him. That idiot probably will get himself killed."

"You know you left the com on, right? And worry less about me, and more about anything in my way."

"Stop showboating and hurry up!" Hannah scolded him.

**Bourne:**

I didn't bother replying to Hero, just shutting down both the link and the comm. I was just focusing on the upcoming fight, and what I remembered from ME3.

_Warning. Repeated collisions with doors may impair mental health._

I punched through another on, easily breaking sprinting records thanks to the armor. _)Unlike some people, I don't use my skull as the method to break through doors.(_

_ ^Dude, I just got here and managed to slit a phantom's throat with my glaive.^_

I smashed through another door, and heard gunfire down the hallway. _)Leave the Dragoons to me. In fact, just stick to one side of the room so I don't have to worry about hitting you on accident.(_

_ You realize that the lash technology they employ would not be compatible with this armor, and even if it was, it would not work with the knives covering your arms?_

_ )So it's an insurance policy for if I ever do get this thing off without dying in the process. Ty, any idea what's going on? Because I don't remember this happening in the game.( _I broke down the door, and found myself in a large warehouse/cargo bay area. The gunfire stopped as most of them turned to look at me. I cracked my neck and knuckles in anticipation. "If any of you want to break those false teeth, now's the time to do it."

Most of them just turned their weapons towards me instead.

"That's the answer I was hoping for." I clapped my hands in front of me, creating a small sphere of energy that tore through several of them that were standing in a line. I rolled behind a crate as they opened fire, and sent a few knives into my hand. _)Hero, how are you two holding up?(_

_ *Not great. They can't get close without walking into the singularity I set up, but they're keeping us pinned in over here.*_

_ )Ty, can you get to them and portal them to a better spot?( _

_ ^Hang on, Hero has a Phantom behind her.^ _Ty shot out of a portal and pinned an invisible entity to the wall that revealed itself to be a phantom. ^_Okay, what are you saying? Ah, portalling Hero and Ashley. Um, no.^_

_ *Why the hell not?!*_

_ )Sigh. Let me guess, only works for you and me?(_

_ ^No, I just don't want to do it because what Hero said to me was really embarrassing and it's not like I said I loved her or anything. Plus, I already accepted that it wasn't possible. She just added insult to injury.^  
)Are you seriously doing this in the middle of a fight?!( *Are you seriously doing this now!?* _Our responses were almost instantaneous.

Before he could reply, the doors on the far side of the room opened up, and an Atlas walked in, slow and menacing. _^Yes, yes I am. Because I know I can do this without her and Ashley. This is Silver difficulty at worst.^_

"Dibs on the mech" I said angrily over the com, activating my omni-blade and vaulting over cover, sprinting right at it. It raised its arm to fire, but I just grabbed a crate and put in front of me to use as a shield. Its rocket blew through it, but I wasn't even slowed.

_)Then if you go down, you better have medigel because I'm not going to be reviving you.( _

The driver aimed the secondary cannon at me, but I was moving too fast for it to get a bead on me._ ^I will be fine. You will have to revive Hero though. Speaking of which, look out Atlas is firing a rocket at you thanks to Bourne.^_

I saw the,mech's arm pointed towards her, and I threw a barrier up around it. The rocket tore through it, but the course was affected enough that it exploded harmlessly on the ground several feet away. _)That was the last rocket this guy's going to fire.( _

I jumped in the air as I reached it, and created a small singularity in my right palm as I landed on it, ensuring I wouldn't slide off. "Time to cut you down to size!" My omni-blade went straight through the protective glass and into his head, killing him instantly. I braced my legs against it, and kicked off, propelling myself through the air and denting the door so someone else couldn't get in and replace him.

"Alright, who's next?!"

The last trooper was looking at me in awe and then fell to his knees and revealed Ty behind him. "God, you are slow."

I opened my face plate, just because I wanted him to see exactly how pissed off I was- enough that my normal poker face was completely gone, replaced by pure rage. . "You're lucky I'm not stabbing you for that stunt you pulled too."

"Bourne, don't tell me what to do in a fight. I have my own method and on top of that, I am a glass cannon right now. What you told me to do was like telling a Fury to go revive the Geth Juggernaut that's in the middle of a cluster fuck of enemies."

I charged at him, and he was sent backwards into a wall. I was instantly there, hand around his throat. "Not being able to help is one thing. But refusing to help a squad mate because she rejected you?" I threw him head first against the far wall. "You're too pathetic for me to even kill."

_You run a high risk of my being ordered to shut you down._

_ )If he does, he's only proving my point. I might like running solo, but at least I know how to work with a team when I need to, instead of just running off and doing whatever the fuck I want.( _

A dragoon suddenly walked through the same door as the Atlas, and I charged at him before he could even activate his whips. I didn't bother with anything fancy, I just shoved my Assassin in his face and pulled the trigger until it overheated. The explosive rounds left almost nothing of his head intact.

I turned back to the cargo bay, angrily storing my weapon. _)I think I actually liked him better when he was drunk.(_

Ty stood up and looked at me. "I already accepted that it wasn't going to happen. What she did, was overkill but I guess that's something she must have picked up from you. Luckily, she didn't pick up your intense rage and inability to handle things in a way that is nonviolent."

I raised a hand, glowing with biotic energy. "Excuse me if I get pissed off because someone tries to get my _friend _killed over a grudge."

"Bourne, you are looking at the guy that could stop someone from dying. So don't tell me that I should feel responsible for everyone's ability to fight. Not like you would save me if I was going to die. Hell, you would probably let me die if given the chance."

I grit my teeth. "If I had to kill you, I would do it in heartbeat. But until said moment of no other choice came, I'd help you as much as I'd help anyone else I fight with. Not that the all powerful user would ever need help." The last bit was dripping with scorn.

"Fuck you, the only help I need is that of my friends. But instead of them here, I got you. The selfish bastard who only thinks about himself and infects everyone else with that method of thinking."

"Only thinks about himself? Do you know how many times I put myself in harms way to save my friends? To save everyone?" I pointed a finger in his face, close enough he could have bitten it if the face mask was open. "I might not be a saint, but don't claim that you are either."

"I'm not a saint and never will be. I am selfish, unfocused, crazy and all powerful when the universe is in my favor. All those things make sure that I won't be a saint but you know what it shows me. I am still real. I can actually leave this place and still maintain a good life. Can you do that or would you puss out because you are scared of the real world?"

It took every ounce of self control I had not to put my fist through his face then and there. "I'm not staying for my sake, I'm staying for Raptor's, Ashley's, and everyone else that's depending on me to help stop the Reapers. I'm staying, despite knowing everything that can and will happen, and everything that could happen. I could die a hundred different ways." I yanked my hand down before I threw a flare right in his face. "Neither of us asked for these responsibilities. But I'm not running from them first chance I get like you. You're a spoiled child with more power than he deserves, with no common sense whatsoever, who acts without thinking, and doesn't give a damn about the consequences!" I spat on the floor in disgust.

"Please, you talk as if you have been in my shoes. You wouldn't know what it's like to be in my shoes."I looked in his hand and saw it covered in golden matrix code. "You think that it's easy being me but it screws with your head. You try having more power than you can handle and everyone always expecting you to help them with their problems." His fist moved quick and struck me across the face but I managed to nail him in the stomach at the same time with my biotics.

The resulting explosion propelled me backwards and I collided into a box and the impact seemed to hurt more than it should have. I brought my hand up to my face but noticed that my mask had somehow closed again.

_)Arnold, open my mask back up(_

_Ty, Arnold is Jason's suit. I am Drew._

I looked over at Ty, and my hands clenched into fists again. _)You know something Ty? When we first met, I thought you were full of crap when you talked about your powers. Now, I know that's about the only thing you've ever said that wasn't full of it. You say you're tired of having all the power, all the answers. Yet every other conversation is about your powers, and what you can do. You act like a god, then are mortal when it suits you. If you had been in my spot, without your precious powers, you wouldn't have lasted ten minutes. And if I'd been in your spot, maybe I wouldn't have either. But you know what, I'd have rather died than become what you are.(_

I saw him sit up rubbing his face. "Ugh, why do I feel fat, heavy and ugly all the sudden?" Something red glinted on his chest, and as it came into the light, I saw it was the same red omega that my armor had. And as I looked at his arms, the same array of knives surrounded it. I snorted in contempt.

"For someone that claims to be so different, you seem to be quick to copy me." A moment later, I realized my voice wasn't right- it sounded way off.

"Bourne, are you alright?" Hannah rushed over from where she'd been, apparently smart enough not to get in our way. But despite her apparent concern for me, it was him she rushed towards.

He pulled away from her. "Hannah, I am the last person you should be worrying about right now." He pulled his hand down and I saw glowing scars.

I felt a chill go down my spine- though I suddenly doubted it really was my spine. _)Ty- look up real quick.(_

Ty looked up and raised an eyebrow. "Why does Bourne have my red zero?" It wasn't his eyebrow I saw though- it was mine.

I tilted my head forward slightly, and the mask opened. "I think I got a _tiiiiiny _bit more than that." I looked over at a guardian's corpse, and reached for his shield, wanting the metal for a reflection. Instead of flying into my hands, it just stayed there, on the ground.

"The fuck, get off me Ashley! Why the hell do you keep calling me Bourne? I am Ty." I looked over, and saw that she'd gotten to him while I was distracted.

_)Are you just retarded? Whatever the fuck you just did, we fucking swapped bodies! FUCK!( _I punched the wall angrily, and started shaking my hand in pain, my enhanced strength gone.

_ "_I know Bourne, might as well tell everyone. Guys, we switched bodies somehow."

_ "..."_

_ *...*_

I looked down at myself- or Ty's self- and sighed angrily. "You know, I can't decide wether I want to kill you, or myself."

"Oh. My. God. I have to try something." I was surrounded in a green aura and then thrusted up into the ceiling and fell back down to the floor. "Shit, if I knew it was that fun, I wouldn't have just yelled at you for beating on me every time you got angry."

I pushed myself back to my knees angrily. "Fun's over. Change us back, or I swear to god I will kill us both!"

_That does not seem likely to work. _

_)Did I ask you?!(_

Hero shook her head. "This is weird, even by our standards, agreed?"

"Understatement of the century." I responded.

Cecelia and Kaidan suddenly rushed in, and took in the carnage at a glance. _God damnit, why do I feel like she's going to come over here and do something I won't like?_

_ ^Do we tell them or should we keep it between the four of us?^_

Cecelia kneeled down next to me and began looking me over. "Are you okay? Why is there a dent in the crate and floor? Why is Bourne across the room?"

I laughed harshly. "Yeah, this is going to sound nuts, but Bourne's actually right here, and Ty's over there."

_*Yeah, don't actually discuss the matter at all before spilling it. Great plan.* _

_)I am not letting that idiot walk around in my body and make me look like a fool without making sure everyone knows he's the idiot doing it, not me.( _

_ ^I can act like Bourne, just brood and whine all the time about not being in my own universe.^_

"Did you hit your head or something?" Cecelia asked, reaching for my forehead. I grabbed her wrist halfway there.

"Let me say this as bluntly as I know how. Ty is in my body, and I'm in his. He did something stupid and we ended up swapping brains as a result." I chuckled slightly. "Or rather, his body got my brain, and my head got a lot lighter."  
Cecelia stood up and wiped her hands together. "Alright, Hannah, Ashley and Kaidan report to the comm room. Ty", she made it a point to look at me, "and Bourne", she looked at Ty, "Go to the medbay and get your heads checked."

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "What sort of proof would you need to believe this? Because apparently all it takes to believe in giant space robots is a bad dream from alien tech. This seems a lot more believable in comparison."

Shepard set her gaze and crossed her arms, "Now."

I grit my teeth a moment before an idea hit me. I shrugged casually and walked over to Ty as he stood up in my body. Then I punched him in the gut, swept his legs from under him, grabbed the knife on his shoulder, then pinned him to the ground and held it to his throat just long enough for everyone to see what had happened.

For his part, he looked slightly dazed as I stood up, looked at Shepard, and held the knife out in front of me. I just opened my palm and let it fall.

It might have convinced her if Ty hadn't retaliated by biotically pinning me to a wall and then sending the knife I had on my body out to line his body and hold me in place. "Can we just go?"

_)Way to go dipshit. You couldn't have taken me by surprise like that, but this I could easily do to you. So much for proof.(_

_ ^Bourne, you are acting irrational like me but way overboard. We need to talk about this and figure out how to break it to everyone without them freaking out because the psychopath is now in the body of someone who can control the universe.^_

_ )Psychopath? Don't you think that's a little far considering you just let those guys back there be eaten by their own stomach acid? I was just going to threaten them, only stab them if I had to.(_

_ *You know, at this point, how about you let it go and we just try to convince them you're not both completely insane and worry about the rest after that…though for the record, I would have been convinced if you hadn't thrown him against the wall.*_

_ ^Yeah, but I want to break it to Shepard and not Bourne.^_

_)Regardless, can you let me down already? Just because I'm the body of a demi-god, doesn't mean you have to crucify me!...God, I can already feel the stupidity built into this thing.(_

_That has nothing to do with your mind's location. It simply was a terrible joke. _

_)And someone tell this thing to shut up!(_

**S7: Alright, I feel awesome. I made pickled red beet eggs.**

**(Ick, why would you want pickles with eggs?)**

**T117: Moron...you know, I've always wondered though, why is it everything is 'pickled noun' but pickled cucumbers are just 'pickles?'**

**S7: Uh, because of jewish tradition.**

**(The mooore youuu knowwww...raaaaiiiinnnbbbooowww.)**

**S7: Actually, that was an honest to god guess that I got right.**

**T117: I'd have guessed it was the first thing we figured out to...well, pickle.**

**S7: Well, at least you didn't make a joke like"...got us out of that pickle." **

**T117: Even I'm not _that _terrible.**

**S7: Also, the Pickle was brought over to America by the Jews as it was a common lunch item. this happened at about the Progressive era and the progressives at the time hated it and actually tried to kill the pickle because it wasn't "American enough." So, now que it Iron.**

**(...That was one of the nerdiest things I've ever heard. So you don't deserve it.)**

**T117: How is knowing history 'nerdy?'**

**(Cause it's him doing it.)**

**S7: I'm sorry that I am majoring in history.**

**(You should be. Anyway, I think this is question time.)**

**T117: Okay, let's see here...the review system doesn't allow them, but I'm pretty sure he's asking who the ~ are. **

**S7: For the third time, that is Layla. If you haven't read Users, you are going to be in the dark until Feros.**

**T117: Okay, next, from DarthXaryi, love the suggestion about Jacob, don't ask about the Iron thing.**

**S7: Yeah… Ty doesn't just do something in cold blood. You don't get style points that way. And the way I see it, the Format Strike is more of a "Get Out of Jail Free" card. It just makes the person go back to spawn, doesn't really inflict any pain, and fully heals them upon resumption.**

**T117:...What about the thing with the stomach acid. That was kinda in cold blood.**

**^I wasn't going to let them die from it. It was more of a.. coxing method.^**

**)So, torture then.(**

**^Bingo!^**

**S7: Alright, so next is Mechanicalcheese with: Why does Ty instinctually want to kill Bourne?**

**^Uh, say what now?^ )What.(**

**~I can answer this, Ty doesn't instinctually want to kill Bourne. His brain goes over likely scenarios if certain events follow a pattern when he is asleep. What you read was his mind going over what would be the likeliest scenario at that point in time if Bourne and he were put in a deathmatch at the end if everything was low key and nothing changed his current relationship with Bourne.~**

**S7: I swear, I love having a character that it makes sense to spew exposition from.**

**~Thanks… I think.~**

**(Hey, I do that, and I'm like Trebor's favorite character to write the rest of the time. And you said we have nothing in common.)**

**S7: Alright, next question!**

**T117: Uh...I guess Masterdude94's is more of a comment, but close enough. The solution we'll end up using is **spoilers removed by host. **That makes plenty of sense, right?**

**S7: Considering I haven't decided who Ty gets with or if he will get with anyone at all? Yeah, I'd call that alright. I just can't decide if it will discredit one of the messages that I tried to put into my story.**

**T117: Yeah, I can definitely see that. **

**S7: Really? Because I am very skeptical since it seems everyone just kinda glances over it and doesn't get it.**

**T117: Well, most people don't have 50 plus extra chapters of this to look at and draw conclusions from, not to mention how much you and I have talked about our stories while writing this, or just while gaming. **

**S7: True. So, any other questions?**

**T117: It doesn't look like it.**

**(I have a question. Why is there an orange monkey dancing on my keyboard, without actually hitting any of the keys? And why is he wearing a leprechaun hat?)**

**T117:...**

Crazey Metal has been logged off by host because there is literally no possible response to that.

**S7: So, I got a question for all the people reading this that are Final Fantasy fans. Bourne, Ty, Hero, Iron, and Cecelia all make up a Final Fantasy team. Select weapons from each game and a class for each of them. We don't care if you mix and match like the class system from XIII with the weapons from VII. Just do it though, we are curious what you guys would come up with. **

**)What's all this 'we' stuff?(**

**^Are you not curious as to how other people see you?^**

**S7: It shows how you see our characters vs how we do. **

**T117: Yeah, but it'll mean absolutely nothing to me cause I've never played that series. Cue more disappointment like last chapter.**

**S7: *Looks away in shame* I guess I will have to explain it to you. Or you can just use the FF wiki to see what they are saying.**

**T117: I'll go with the latter.**

**S7: And that is our cue to exit, stage left. 1473I2.**

**T117: Sayonara. **


	26. I Really Hate Myself

**Ty:**

I sat down on the table and had to keep my mouth open while Chakwas was examining it. Yet, it wasn't my mouth that needed to be checked, it was my eyes. I had no idea how Bourne managed to see everything so supersaturated.

_^So, other than feeling totally repulsive, I feel completely weak.^_

_ )You feel weak? I went from super strength to barely average! Not to mention feeling nearsighted, partially deaf, and oh yeah, no biotics!(_

I closed my mouth and snapped my jaw down so hard it broke Chakwas's popsicle stick thing that she was using to move my tongue around. "Whoops, sorry."

_)And on top of that, we're both going to make each other look like idiots until we get people to accept that our brains swapped. Me because I lost my super reflexes and shit and feel really slow and clumsy, and you because you can now bend steel with your hands on accident. Or, my hands on accident. Whatever(_

I laughed at his apparent concern. _^No, not we have to figure this out. You have to figure this out. I'm Bourne, I can't reprogram stuff.^ _

_ )Well, since I have no idea how the hell to undo this either, we're going to be stuck this way for a while. And if Cecelia starts making out with me in your body, that's going to be all kinds of weird, so it'd be nice if we can avoid that…granted, there are far worse things that could happen, but nonetheless…(_

_ ^If you do, I will bang Ashley.^_

_ )I didn't say I was going to go up to her and just start frenching her! I mean...argh! If I had my biotics right now- Wait, your body still has Flare, so I can totally do that.(_

_ ^My body has a huge toll to using that power, remember? Your nose will explode with blood. Now, I reiterate, if you kiss Shepard, I will sex up Ashley. And I will be sure to do a lot with her. Stuff that you will be tasting once you get your body back.^_

_ )What is so hard to understand about the fact that I do not want Cecelia making out with me!...okay, actually, I guess I can understand that. My point is, how the hell do we convince them that we didn't just go nuts? Because my last attempt went over like a lead balloon tied to a hundred Krogan.(_

_ ^Maybe we should just try to play this off as best as possible. It will be a lot easier and your biotics are pretty easy to control.^_

_ )Maybe, but I can't even change the color of this chair I'm in, let alone anything that would actually help in a fight. And again, I'd rather not end up in some weird love rectangle. Or whatever weird shape this would actually be.(_

_ ^Yeah, now, remember what I taught you. Imagine the process not the result and try changing the chair.^_

He banged his head against the wall. _)Drew, you got any advice? You've been in his head longer than me…No, of course not, that'd be too easy.(_

_ So, Ty is currently in the body I am inhabiting, correct?_

I just realized that Arnold was this body's AI and calmed myself down from the creepy question. "Yep, I am good. Well, I better get out of here."

Chakwas put her hand on my chest and ineffectively tried to keep me where I was. "No, Bourne, you need to stay in place. The commander told me to keep you here till I figure out what is wrong with you two."  
"We've told you what's wrong a hundred times!" Bourne made no effort to hide his irritation. "Are you deaf or something?!"

I put my hand on Chakwas's shoulder. "I can take care of him. Trust me, I am starting to remember everything."

Chakwas looked between us and nodded. "Fine, but if you get into trouble I am drugging you both until I figure out what is wrong."

"Yeah, except my body is genetically engineered, so it'd work on him for maybe 10 minutes, assuming you got the dosage right on the first attempt."

Chakwas turned back to me. "Okay, Bourne, you can go. I am going to need Ty here for additional tests."

There was an electric crackling as he activated my omni-tazer. "Don't even think about it." He looked down at his arm for a moment. "Yeah, don't really see the appeal over the flaming version. I mean, yeah, it works, but it just lacks...flare." He shook his head. "Christ, what do I have to do to convince you idiots? Shoot left handed? Do a backspring? Demonstrate the ability to shut up for more than five minutes? I'm open to suggestions here!"

I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him to a corner. "Look, you are me now so drop all the anger first off. Second, stop being a little bitch about this and just accept you are me for a little while."

"I can 'accept' I'm in your body. But I'm not going to 'become' you." He stopped and put a hand over his eyes, before a thought seemed to hit him. "And if you don't help me convince them of the body swap, I can go around the ship as 'you' and ruin your reputation entirely. Maybe also go tell Cecelia she's the ugliest lady and worse kisser I've ever met, and I want to throw up everytime I see her." He crossed his arms. "And if you think I'm bluffing, feel free to test it."

No matter how bad my heart was saying to not let him, my mind was the voice I listened to and it was to let him. "Fine, go do that because it is going to be worse to try and tell them we are each other and there is a higher chance of us being put into a loony bin."

He threw his hands in the air. "We already proved memory erasing is possible, why would mind switching be so unbelievable?"

"Because imagine Ashley kissing you/me. Wait, you might enjoy it because I don't look like the most disgusting thing in the world."

"Jesus christ, the council was less idiotic than you are currently being!" He threw his hands in the air. "Screw this, I'm outta here." He put his hand on a wall, and was suddenly sucked through the portal that suddenly opened. _)Wait, how the hell did I just do that?(_

I just shook my head and stepped out the door only to be immediately greeted by Ashley. "You feeling better now?"

I looked at my hands and shrugged. "I guess. I need to get down to the simulator."

"I'll come with you."

I turned to her and didn't know what Bourne would do so I asked him. _^Uh, Ashley apparently didn't get the memo earlier and is trying to follow me to the simulator. Little help?^_

_ )Yeah, give me a sec to think...got it. Say you need to blow off steam alone, without an audience... And maybe blame Ty for the stress.(_

I shrugged. "Uh sure, you can come but I'm not going to be talking all that much. Need to figure some things out and I do that best when I am holding a gun in my hands."

_)Not what I wanted, but close enough to pass I guess.(_

_ ^I'm trying to not make you look like an asshole that blames his problems on one guy all the time.^_

_ )...point reluctantly conceded. Any idea how long we have till Feros?(_

"Okay, I can use some target practice anyway." Ashley followed me to the elevator and I hit the button.

"So, how long do we have until we reach Feros?"

Ashley pulled up her omni-tool and checked the time. "Uh, about two and a half hours."

_ ^Two and a half hours.^_

_ )F. M. L. How am I supposed to learn how to use this thing in that little time?(_

_ ^Okay, remember the first trick I told you I learned?^_

_ )I'm not sure. What exactly do you mean?(_

_ ^If you need skills then place your hand on your face and think of fighting. It will program every game character you have seen fight into your brain.^_

_ )...Alright, I guess it couldn't hurt as a starting point.(_

The elevator hit the bottom floor and I stepped out and headed for the range. Ashley took a second but caught up to me. "So, Bourne, are you feeling alright?"

Scratched at my arm and thought about it. "All things considered, I feel like everything is too bright and too loud."

"Maybe you are having a migraine from your biotic amp?"

The door to the shooting range was already open and when I stepped inside, I saw Hero had already beat me to the punch. With an audible sigh I grabbed my assault rifle off my back and took up on the left side of the shooting range. After I synced in, twice as many enemies popped up and I took aim.

I fired three bursts and took down four enemies. In my old body I could never aim a gun accurately enough or fight the recoil to get all the shots in. I let a smile come to my face and I quickly began firing more rapidly. Without knowing it, I was taking them down faster than the enemies could be spawned. That, of course, made Hero chime in with her two cents.

_*You know, if you keep taking them down like that, you're going to have a hard time convincing anyone you're not actually Bourne.*_

I heard her but something came over me. It seemed like I had forgotten the thing that got me through my playthrough but I just realized it again. "Because it was fun…"

"What you mean by that?"

"You don't get it", I collapsed the rifle and stood up. "When I fought before, I did so looking to do more and have a good time. Now, I think I've taken on his attitude and expect everyone to stab me in the back."

I turned around and thought of the one biotic ability I always wanted to try. Focusing on the teleport that the Fury can do I tuned whatever Hero or Ashley said out and flipped forward. There was a slight tingle and I felt like I just slide down a waterslide but I landed it and turned around.

I had jumped all the way across the room and they were staring at me with their mouths agape. "I always wanted to do that."

_)Ok, good news first or bad news? That was rhetorical, so I'll just go with bad news first. I only have a few games I can get useful combat data or whatever from. Good news is, those games are Assassin's Creed, Mortal Kombat, and the two greatest superhero games ever made, the Arkham games. But having said that, your closing the eyes trick isn't working so far, and all I've gotten is an annoying after image that won't go away.(_

I fought off a laugh. ^_Well, I can biotically teleport like the Fury. I must be a better Bourne than you are.^_

_ )There is a difference between not knowing how to do something, and just saying 'fuck it, charge is close enough' and using that because it's simpler. And cooler.(_

I hit a few buttons on my omni-tool and brought up a simulated Krogan. Quickly, I began teleporting around it, firing off blows and then jumping to a new place before it could see me.

_)You know, maybe it's not working because I'm not really you. Any idea how Danny or Cody used their powers?(_

l hit the Krogan with a biotic punch and sent it flying across the room and landing between Hero and Ashley. ^_Danny just kind of feels it and thinks about the weapon. Cody has a randomization thing going on so he smacks the vehicle and gets what he gets.^_

_ )And you have to concentrate on what you're doing, right? Which is in serious contrast to how I use my biotics. Most of the time, I'm just kinda using them without really thinking about what I'm doing...come to think of it, that's pretty much what happened with the glitch earlier.(_

I cracked my neck and began looking for another opponent to take on. _^I have no idea how you will do it then. Sounds more like you will be randomizing like Cody… Hang on, have you ever tried doing something like the biotic hammer with your knives?^_

_ )Like the Krogan Warlord in multiplayer?...Not quite the same thing, but I've used the biotics to put more force behind them when they've been thrown. How are you coming along with those by the way? Any problems figuring crap out?(_

_ ^Nope, Hero says that if I keep it up people will have a tough time believing that I'm not you. I wonder if I can do annihilation field.^_

_ )Until you open you mouth anyway. Then the differences become quite clear...and how is it you can use abilities I can't?(_

_ *If the fellow biotic can make a suggestion, I've got two theories. Either the fact he wasn't merged with Iron makes him less vanguard based, or else it's his less aggressive nature. You're generally more...direct than strategic. No offense.*_

_ ^That, or the fact that I focus on what I am doing rather than feeling it allows me to consciously pick the attack I am going to do and enact it.^_

_ )I don't just wave my arm and hope something happens you know. If I want to warp something, it gets warped. If I want to make a shield, a shield appears. If I want to make a singularity...you get the idea. But it is an interesting point.(_

I looked at the range and saw that the enemies were beginning to fill it again. ^_I kind of am excited to fight Iron if I am in your body Bourne. Think about how surprised he will be when he can't predict your fighting style.^_

_)I'm hoping we can get this sorted out before that happens. Iron's less skilled than me, even if he's more experienced. Saren has the edge in both fields.(_

I pulled one of the knives off my arm and opened it._ ^It all depends on you Bourne. I can't do it this time. You have to fix this and be the man that does everything.^_

_ )Two things. A, some sort of 'No pressure' joke and B: you left out the part where I'm fixing your mista- wait, maybe I'm actually not. Think about the timing for a sec.(_

_ ^What are you talking about 'the timing'?^_

_ )Think about what we were talking about. How neither of knew what the other one went through, how neither of us could handle being in the other's place- can't be coincidental...is it possible to murder an AI? Because honestly, I really want to try.(_

_ ^I'm happy about this then. It will give you a chance to deal with everyone asking you to do a ton of shit you don't care about. By the way, Shepard wants you to speed up the transfer process for the Normandy.^_ I floated the knife on my finger and began to spin it until I couldn't see past it. Then, with a flick of my wrist, I sent it down range and began chopping the heads off Geth with it.

_)You know, if you keep this attitude up, I might delay putting us back just so I can land your body in hot water, and leave you to deal with the mess. Maybe steal all of Cecelia's underwear and get caught doing it before portaling away and swapping us back.(_

_ *That is...devious. I'm actually impressed despite myself.*_

I pulled the knife back and put it back. _^Your just pissed because I didn't pull you out of the fray when you were in trouble.^_

_ *Gee, you figure that out yourself, or did someone help you?*_

_ )Technically, I did tell him it was a complete asshole move...does that count?(_

I pulled all the knives off the holders and activated them using quick hand motions to control the biotics. _^Honestly, you two can live in your little world of regret, hate, betrayal, distrust, arguments, and the like because I am done. I'm just gonna have fun with this because it is something to have fun with.^_

Somehow, Bourne managed to send an evil grin along the mental link. _)You know, you're right.( _

All of a sudden, my legs gave out and I fell to the ground. _)While I was trying to make something happen, I found the "obey Ty switch" for Arnold and Drew, and switched it around to me. You'll be able to change it back when I fix this, but for now...muahahaha!(_

"Hey, Ashley", I looked over at her from my spot on the ground. "Mind heading out for a sec so I can talk to Hannah?"

She shrugged. "Alright. It's pretty obvious I'm not going to be able to hit anything with you here anyway." She turned and started walking towards the door.

As soon as she was out, I pulled myself up and rested on my elbows. "So, first thing's first Hero. Sorry."

_*Bourne, give him back his legs.*_

_ )Oh come on, let me enjoy this for a minute.(_

_ *NOW.*_

_ )You are no fun at all, you know that? Arnold, you heard the lady.(_

I stood up all the way and walked over to her. "Seriously though, I'm sorry. I acted like an ass and should have helped you when you needed it."

She looked at me for a minute before grimacing. "Yes, you should have...but apology accepted."

_)Wow, really, that's it? Damn, you _are _full paragon.(_

I swallowed and finally acknowledged the pit in my stomach. "I am being one-hundred percent truthful though. I guess I let Bourne's attitude get to me and then took it out on you."

_)You know, if you'd figured this out a little bit sooner-(_

_ *Bourne, shut the hell up. Go experiment with Ty's powers or something...and try not to fuck anything up too badly.*_

_ )Anything? No mention of anyone, so I can totally work with that.( _The line winked out on his end.

"Let me be the one who's one-hundred percent honest now. I'm a little worried about what's he's going to do."

I put my hand up and waved her off. "I'm done with that stuff. Bourne can live in his own little world of distrust and hate. I'm here enjoying who I am and the fact that this is going to be one hell of a ride… again."

She shook her head. "You don't know anything about him. Neither does he, for that matter...you're both alike in a few ways. Hurt one of you, bad. Hurt someone you care about: start running and start praying."

"You know", I paused just thinking about my next words to be sure. "That emotion that Drew assumed was love isn't love. It was respect."

She smiled. "And do you always show that respect by making out in an elevator?"

"Cecelia is a different matter." I smiled too. "I fought you, granted with some serious constraints on my powers but still. You held your own and that's why I made sure to carry you out of there. As a sign that there was no hard feelings and respect."

She opened her mouth to reply, but if she said something, I didn't hear it because my own hand suddenly flew up to my own face and smacked me hard enough to make me see stars.

_)Hey Ty, did something just happen to you?(_

_ *Don't pretend that was an accident Bourne.*_

_ )What was an accident?(_

I looked at her and smiled. "Least he is having fun too. By the way, remind me to turn him into a woman when I get my powers back."

_)Oops, looks like I 'accidently' deleted that function. But seriously, what did I just do to him? I was looking at the mental link to see if the mind thing could be reversed with that somehow.(_

_ *You made him slap himself in the face.*_

_ )...Perfect memory, I love that you made sure I'd know how to do it again if he gets on my nerves.(_

I looked over where I was laying and realized all the knives I had out were laying on the ground. With a quick flick of my wrist, I lifted them up and they all began to spin. Then, with another flick, I sent them into the range and cleared out the enemies and restored them.

I quickly blocked the mental link before turning to Hero. "Can you block Bourne out for a second?"

"Yes...but he just told me he had Arnold give him access to the audiovisual feed in your helmet. I kinda wondered how he was keeping up with the conversation that was out loud."

I leaned back on the cover and thought for a moment. "Well, then, Arnold."

"Don't worry, he says he's going to, quote 'let you talk about me behind my back, because this is actually more fun to mess with than I thought it'd be.' Unquote."

"Well, that's good. But I wasn't going to talk about Bourne."

"Just something you don't want him knowing about?...or are you just getting tired of him butting in too?"

"Both, he's getting into my business a lot more that I'd like."

"Well, to be fair, that body is on loan. So technically, it's his business. But yeah, I get the gist."

"Okay, you have my memories minus some that I don't want you to see, correct?"

"Yes. Though some of them are a bit confusing because you were drunk at the time."

"Well, Cecelia has been catching my eye a lot more. Now, I'm very skeptical right now about love, relationships, and women who like me. But, is it weird if I am falling for a program?"

"...Well, that's a bit out of nowhere." She commented, but it did look like she was genuinely considering the question.

"Forget it, stupid question. I'm gonna go steal a beer from Kaidan's stash and see what I can do with biotics while I am drunk." I got up and began walking toward the door.

"Ty, is isn't a stupid question, it's just an unexpected one." She said, following me. "Way I see it, it's not much different than Joker and EDI hooking up. Not common, but not what I'd call weird...also, you know that unless Bourne does something, it's literally impossible for you to get drunk with what's onboard, right?"

Quickly my legs gave out from under me and slammed into the ground. "Damn it."

"Was Bourne being an ass again, or was that just you?"

I shook my head. "This is me giving up on life for a little bit."

"If you ask Bourne, he might be able to get something working… or he'd accidentally remove the liver instead. Yeah, on second thought, probably a bad idea."

"Hero, three thing you should know about me. I am in college so I drink a lot, I hate both the Tali and Garrus along with Joker and EDI, and Firefly is one of my favorite shows."

"...what does that last one have to do with the current situation?"

"It's the only thing keeping me going right now."

She sighed. "Just hang in there. Bourne's not a genius, but he's bound to figure it out at least on accident at some point."

I rolled over and stared at the ceiling. "Well, chances rest in favor of him not figuring it out. Especially with Ashley weighing him down."

"He managed to win last time with her here...and I think the reason he's being so...reluctant to do anything with her is because it's a different 'her.' In his mind, it's like cheating on his version. But at the same time, he doesn't want to just ignore her entirely in case he ends up stuck here."

I facepalmed. "Hero, my powers are based on one not questioning what they can do. Bourne can't delete anything I can do because he only can manipulate his own mind. Now, when you are in a relationship with someone you begin to question yourself and in turn question what you can do. If you question it, you don't believe it. If you don't believe it, you can't do it."

"If he honestly didn't think he could use your powers, he wouldn't be so calm about it. Look, between Iron, and a billion other screw ups, he's almost always doubting himself, even if he doesn't show it, or even know it."

"So we are screwed. I'm going to be stuck as him forever."

She shook her head. "Not what I meant. His strength isn't that he lacks self doubt, it's that he can overcome it to get the job done. Hell, he might even be having fun doing it."

"Hero, it's not doubting what you can do. If he doubts it then it can't be done. He has to believe he can and he will."

"Good advice." She raised a hand to her comm. "You get all of that Bourne?...alright, then get to work.."

"Of course he was listening in. I wonder if I could bring a pillow down from the sleeping pods so I can lay here comfortably."

The next moment, a pillow fell from the ceiling and landed next to me.  
"He's a quick learner when he's determined." Hero commented.

I positioned the pillow under my head. "Let's just hope he is a 'true believer' as Stan Lee would say."

My omni-tool suddenly dinged from an incoming message. I clicked the button and opened it so I could read it**. The Phrase was "Face Front True Believers". **

**Bourne:**

I closed the omni-tool and stepped away from the glitch. I'd been skeptical of Ty when he'd said how many there were, but now I was seeing them almost every five feet. I looked around the hallway again. How I was seeing it now was...different, to say the least. I'd tried Ty's trick of picturing the code, but it hadn't worked. What I'd managed with a little effort was more like a trance, or walking meditation. Instead of seeing only the code, it was more like it had been overlaid across the environment, and if I really focused on something, then its functions would be labeled. And as for how to interact with it- I imagined myself typing the commands, maybe even actually moving my fingers if I needed to.

It made sense in an odd way though. I had a difficult time believing everything was just code, and not actually real. Even with proof to the contrary. But if I only saw the important parts, where I could interact with it- _Then I can make Arnold actually listen to me for once. Or Drew, when it's called for. _

I fingered the tomahawk I'd grabbed out of Ty's locker. Since it was coded to his biosignature, I hadn't even had to try anything fancy with it. _Though if he remembers to store my Assassin, I'm going to replace it with his gun when he's not looking._

_ ^Where's my tomahawk?^_

_ )You have my knives. Seemed only fair. And I thought you were taking a nap anyway.(_

_ ^No, I'm laying here in self loath because I can't drink.^_

_ )Yeah, I'd try to help you with that, but since I apparently have to believe I can do something, and I'm worried about causing liver failure...that thing already got replaced once. Just saying.(_

_ ^I'm going to be trapped in your body forever. I am going to be stuck in here for the rest of my life. I am going to go back to your universe and everyone is going to hate me. My only friends will be a girl that I don't really like and a hot lesbian.^_

_ )On the off chance that does happen, don't call her that to her face unless you want yours punched in. And relax, will you? Way I see it, this is like a mod or something. And mods can be uninstalled.(_

_ ^But, I have no idea how I installed this mod as you call it. But to make more logical sense. I think our minds got taken out of our files and transferred to the other person.^_

_ )Then all I have to do is transfer them back. Easy peasy lemon squeezy...hey, have you felt more brooding or depressed since ending up in my body? Because for some reason, I'm in a way better mood than I should be.(_

_ ^Yes, yes I am. Luckily, my sparkling sense of humor is keeping me from becoming biotic batman like you.^_

_ )Batman wishes he was as cool as me...god, please tell me I didn't just say that.(_

_ I could reassure you if you wish, but it would not be true._

I rolled my eyes at Drew.

Suddenly, I felt a pair of hands land on my shoulders and push me forward. "I need to talk to you."

_ )Ty, your girlfriend says she wants to talk to me. How do I get away without fucking it up for you?(_

_ ^Uh… Uh… Uh… I don't know. Go see what she needs, if it gets too awkward tell me and I will port in their with the teleport.^_

I turned around to face her, making sure the faceplate was closed. "What about?" I tried to sound casual, though it was honestly really strange not hearing my own voice.

"Come to my room and I will show you." She kept pushing me along past the elevator and right to her door.

_)She's telling me to come into her room so she can 'show me'...Awkward zone engaged.( _

_ ^I will be there in a sec.^_

The door opened and she sat me down in front of her computer. On the video feed was Ty laying in a test chamber and a Cerberus scientist facing the camera.

_)Wait, this might not be what I thought it was. I think she's been looking over the OSDs we took about "patient zero" and "patient 24"(_

_ ^Okay, then I'm just going to continue to lay here.^_

_ )Just...be ready, alright? I don't think she knows how to open this thing, but if she starts stripping or something like that...well, honestly, that show might be worth the consequences. Damnit, no, no, bad Ty's brain. Stop making me act like him!( _I shook it away and focused on the guy at the screen.

"-Day one hundred and seventeen."

_)You might want to see this. I get the feeling that she's going to have questions about it, and my last attempt at a fake backstory failed pretty spectacularly in the long run. Drew, send my audio-video feed to his omni-tool.( _

_ ^Sounds good, I could use something to watch… maybe I will just look up firefly.^_

I ignored that as the scientist continued. "Results so far have been...unexpected, to say the least. Then again, when they told me they took his brain from an old millenium game none of us knew what to think. Somehow, this man got his mind stuck in the game Dragon Age. We were able to extract it and now the nanites are reacting to it."

_)Well, at least they got the right developer.( _ I glanced over at Shepard, but her face was unreadable.

"Now, the man refers to everything as a video game believing that he is still in it. Some of the men have been calling him Ty. I cannot comprehend why but then again the tests we have been running haven't really been on the people around him."

_)You're watching this, right? Because as far as documentaries go-(_

_ ^Huh, no, I have been watching Firefly season 3. I can't believe they actually got around to making this.^_

_ )Arnold, override his omni-tool's extranet and transmit this instead...and delete the extranet history of anything he looks at.( _

_^Bourne, I will just open up a new tab and watch it. I just don't care about what's going on with my origin story.^_

_ )Have it your way. Drew, begin reversing male enhancement of this body.(_

_ Ty never had male enhancement done. It wasn't needed._

_ )... So much for that threat._( I looked from the normally invisible mental link- which was its own set of zeros, and the code at the edge of the screen. I shrugged and made the tv's code plug directly into our brains as the guy continued talking. "Some of the things he's able to do are baffling. We obviously don't understand what these Prothean nanites can do but the possibilities so far are limitless."

"Here's where it gets interesting." Cecelia commented as the video feed was cut and turned back on.

The man looked a bit older from the last vid. "Patient Zero as he is now called has taken a strange turn. The cloned nanites we took from patient twenty four have formed a red Zero on his chest. It doesn't look like it is going to be a problem but further investigation is necessary."

The next timestamp on the screen showed it was just a week later. "One of the men invited Ty to play poker with them. He ended up winning all their money so they tried beating him. He did not raise a fist to them but the men that engaged him are now experiencing major acid reflux and their stomachs have lost their ability to hold their own stomach acid."

_)...that's the same thing you did back on the cerberus ship.(_

_ ^This isn't real remember? It's a lie made by the AI to convince Shepard and the others of the nanite story.^_

_ )I know. But lets just say that type of lie isn't the easiest to cover all bases with...also, this pretty clearly states that we knew each other before we met on Eden Prime, despite acting like we hadn't.(_

_ ^It said that I got cloned nanites from you, not that I met you.^_

_ )Lets hope she accepts that.( _

The last vid came on and the place was being torn apart. "Ty has gone crazy. We tried to turn him off but he didn't want to and said we were trying to make him lose. We have no idea why he believes this but he has liquified several men and is now trying to wake the other-" the man was cut off as he became covered in code and exploded, revealing a Ty, now covered in blood.. Ty looked at the camera and smiled.

"This is patient Zero otherwise known as Ty coming to you live from Cerberus base zero-five-one. Now, most of you are asking yourselves why I am doing this and all I can say is… for the laughs. Now, I got thirty other patients to wake up so, later." After that the video closed off and left only a blank screen.

"...you know, I never have much liked documentaries." I said aloud, guessing that Shepard would be pissed about us 'hiding' this. _That, or she'll be turned on by it._

"You remember any of this?"

_)Ty?(_

^_Somewhat, my memory got corrupted by a shot to the head right at the end.^_

"Well, some of it. I think I got shot in the head at one point, which scrambled things up a little."

She bit her lower lip and seemed to think of it for a second. "Okay, now let me show you Bourne."

)_This'll be interesting. Or terrifying. Or possibly creepy.( _"You're not calling him up here to see it himself?"

"No, I wanted you to see this first since you are in one of the videos."

"Alright. Fire it up then."

The same man from before came on the screen, looking years or even decades younger. "Cerberus Lab zero-five-one, project upsilon, day three hundred and forty three. Attempts to genetically engineer a biotic super soldier have finally borne fruit." The camera shifted to reveal what had to have been a younger version of myself. "Although the accelerated growth has proven effective so far, it may have untold side effects on his mind. It's an experiment within an experiment. As a result, we are beginning the same process with another set of these clones. If necessary, we can use him as to learn from our mistakes and succeed with the others."

_)Why do I not like the sound of that?(_

The next vid was at a much later point in time. "Day four hundred and ninety eight. The original soldier is a total loss. Complete mental degradation. Fortunately, we had already slowed the progress of the others, so there is a chance they'll be more controllable. On the off chance they are not, we are setting two aside. Instead of imprinting during development, we are going to be going the more traditional route to get them to our way of thinking. It will be years before anything further comes of though."

I whistled softly as the video skipped forward again.

"Day eight hundred and forty four. The in utero imprinting was a failure. Only Patients 23 and 24 have survived. Luckily, there seem to thus far be no negative effects from their...unusual origins. Aside from a possible case of sociopathy in 24. He seems unusually aggressive, and sarcastic His face never seems to move. Odd, given that 23 seems to charm anyone he talks to. We had to discipline one of the nurses after he convinced her to sneak him chocolate. We will be accelerating his combat training, and seeing if we can train him further in that field, for espionage and overcover work." It blinked out.

Before I could say anything, the last vid started and Ty was on the screen. "You're prime time with Ty. Now, these two have really gotten on my nerves in the last couple months. Not just with the fighting and the fact that you keep throwing me in the ring with subject twenty-three but just how attached to them you are. So, here's what I am going to do. I am going to release them at the same time and see what happens. Maybe twenty-four can tear twenty-three to shreds or vise versa. But anyway", he hit a button on the control pad, "let's just observe, shall we?" After that the vid cut and it was over.

_)Twenty-three?(_

_ ^Iron, dumbass.^_

_ )Yeah, guess it'd have to be. That or it's just something the AI made up for kicks.( _

_ ^I think it said you were a clone too.^_

_ )Yeah, I noticed.(_

"If his face is anything to go on, Bourne lost that fight." I said, turning to Cecelia.

She nodded. "Yeah, I don't know if we should show him though."

"Why not?" I asked, genuinely curious how she thought I might react.

"He's unstable and has said before he has amnesia. On top of that, imagine how angry he would be if he found out that you are the reason his face got screwed up."

I chuckled. "He already threw me out of an elevator. Hard to see how he'd top that."

She thought for a moment. "Ty, can we talk about us for a moment?"

_)...FML. Or FYL. Whichever. What should I say? Or should I just go with my gut and open that glitch on the ceiling over there?(_

_ ^Keep calm and listen to me. Say yes.^_

_ )I can do one of those things.( _"Sure."

She looked a bit distraught. "The stuff you and I have been doing lately. Is that harmless flirting or is there something behind it?"

_)I just want to point out I could totally ruin your life right now, but am going to be nice and not do that.(_

_ ^And because you aren't, I thank you. Just tell her, you never thought past it until now. But now that she mentions it. You think there might be.^_

_ )Huh. I was kinda expecting you to say the opposite...wait, is this some reverse psychology bullshit where you're saying the opposite of what you mean because you think I'm going to turn it on its head and actually try to ruin your life? Because I was being straight up when I said I was going to say what you told me to.(_

_ ^Fuck it, I have been watching firefly here and Malcolm just gave me the best advice ever. If it wasn't going to work then I would have an example not to do it and I don't.^_

"Well, I hadn't really thought about it till now. But, yeah, I think there might be."

Shepard's head fell on my shoulder and she let out a deep sigh. "Thank god, I was hoping I wasn't just embarrassing myself."

_)Yeah, this is getting weird. Any way for me to get out here?...Maybe call me on the Com or something?(_

There was a huge flash behind me and when I turned around I saw Ty in my body, leaning against the wall.

"Don't you ever knock?" I fake gripped.

"Sorry, needed to see if the teleport works through walls."

Shepard turned around and took a swing at him but he teleported to the other side of the room. "Gees, Ty, now I know why you port all over the ship. This is just fun."

"I know I ditched her, but did Chakwas finish checking your head out? I don't think I've ever heard you use the word fun in your life. You sure you even know what it means?"

"I recently learned the meaning when I figured out how to do this." He teleported forward, grabbed me and teleported us into the cafeteria.

I looked down at myself, then at him. "Damn, I need to learn how to do that when I get back in there."

Ty smiled and crossed his arms. "I thought you said that biotic charging was enough?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't go through walls...Well, it _does_, actually, if the wall's weak enough. But it can't get past walls."

Joker cut him off from his reply with an announcement. "Attention ground team. ETA, thirty minutes."

I looked at him, and me, and the various labels for the code that surrounded us both. I sighed. "Good thing I downloaded the knowledge how to use your tech powers. Because no way I can switch us back that quickly." I looked up at him. "I don't even want a scratch on that body, got it?" It was partly said in humor, but also very serious.

"Pft, it's a rental." With that he ported away and was nowhere to be seen.

_How is it that even though he's in my body, I still want to break his nose? And arms? And legs?_

_ *How'd your meeting with 'your' girlfriend go?*_

_ )Like a documentary.( _I deadpanned. _)I'm going to head down and gear up.(_

_ *You're not seriously thinking of fighting in Ty's body, are you?*_

_ )What else am I supposed to do, break my own leg so I can't? Or his own leg so I can't? Fuck this is confusing! I think I prefered the venom speak!(_

_ ^Dude, you are going to have to stay behind me for a lot of this. I at least can run your powers efficiently.^_

_ )I think I can hit a button to launch a fireball. Or a combat drone. Or freeze something. I downloaded a few apps for these things when I taught myself how to batman someone.(_

_ *And if you forget which buttons are which?*_

_ )...Do you remember who you're talking to?(_

_ *I didn't know if the perfect memory carried over.*_

_ )It did. I'll prove it.( _I tugged the code that ran from me to Ty, and there was a faint crash somewhere down below. _)How are the legs working?(_

_ ^You just made me punch Wrex across the bay!^_

_ )...(_

_ *Yeah, I'm going to ask Cecelia if she wants me to fill in for you. Or for _you_, if Wrex manages to kill him.(_

_ ^He told me that he is beginning to like you almost as much as he likes Ty.^_

_ )Which is why I totally meant for that to happen.( _

_ Your elevated heart rate suggests that statement is false._

_ )This sentence is false.( _

_ Paradoxes don't work on us._

_ )Meh, it was worth a try.(_

_ *Yeah, you're staying here.*_

I looked around the mess hall, at the various glitches, looking for one that led to the cargo bay. There was one near Alenko's terminal, so I headed towards it. _)I'm not an idiot, alright? I got Fortification, and a Geth Shield boost.. And I don't see how cryo explosions or fire explosions are that much different than a biotic combo. _

_ ^You don't have Tech armor, Fortification is more for melee and Geth shield boost breaks once your shields are out.^_

_ )I also possess the unique ability to duck behind cover...though Tech Armor is a good idea. And maybe switch Shield Boost for defense matrix.( _I activated my omni-tools, and they were instantly covered in the code. _)Boom. Done.(_

_ *Are you sure you did what you meant to?*_

_ ^I'm not. Then again, I never needed it.^_

I looked down at my arms, and hit a button on my right wrist. A moment later, I was surrounded by the glowing orange energy armor. _)Well, considering I just activated tech armor, I'd say I did. Hmm, wonder what else I could load this thing up with?( _I hit the button again, and the detonation broke the screen on Alenko's terminal. I sighed, and waved a hand over it, code forming a sort of transparent tablet. I looked at the various options, and hit repair. _)Though if I have to deal with any of those thorian creepers, I have a really good way to kill several at once.(_

_ *What did you break with it?* _Hero asked with a sigh.

_ )Nothing I can't fix. Boom, good as new.( _I removed my hand, and instead plunged it into the glitch, letting it suck me through. I landed on my feet in front of my locker. _Huh, that reminds me. _I used the code to open it, grabbed my Assassin, and put in Ty's gun before closing it again.

_^Well, time to tear the loogy a new one.^_

_ )It's already guaranteed to go better than last time I did it.( _

**^Uh, I feel… what's the word for not hungry?^**

**S7: Yeah, it's gotta be a different experience being someone who can't eat.**

**)Argh! Why is stuff not flying into my hands when I reach for it! I hate having to walk and get stuff!(**

**T117: The sad part is, I think that actually would be my reaction too.**

**^Okay, how do I teleport?^**

**S7: Uh, Bourne?**

**)Fuck. Off. Seriously T117, you let _Ty _figure out how to do that after saying a hundred times that- seriously dude. Not. Cool.(**

**T117: It was Spike's idea.**

**)And you just went along with it. Not. Cool.(**

**S7: Yeah, now Ty can still teleport.**

**^Only this teleportation kinda sucks since it is short distance and takes away my shields. Trust me Bourne you're not missing out on much.^**

**)Yeah, but I went to lift something earlier and almost threw my...er, your back out. How do you handle being this...not strong?(**

**^I just transform my armor into something that boosts my strength.^**

**)Yeah, I meant...forget it.(**

**^You were trying to make fun of me, weren't you?^**

**)Dude, I just went from super soldier to skinny nerd. So yeah, let's go with that.(**

**^You are such an asshole!^**

**)Says the guy that caused this in the first place!(**

**T117: I can always log you both out if you don't want to talk to each other.**

**^If you did that then this caveman would probably break his keyboard over your head!^**

**)Why would I hit him with a device he's probably rigged to explode? Even if I didn't get killed when it went off, it'd do that to him, and then I'm depending on the nutcase that created _you _to finish this thing alone.(**

**(Uh...I'm just saying, T117's the guy that put me together, so...I think he's a lot more of a nutcase than Spike.)**

**)Fine. The _nerd _that put Ty together. And before you say T117's a nerd, he is, but Spike's a way bigger nerd.(**

**T117: I don't know about...okay, at least slightly more of a nerd than me.**

**S7: Yeah, least I don't enjoy grabbing other men.**

**)Hey, looks like there was an error with auto correct there. It said don't instead of do.(**

**S7: Hey you know what I enjoy? Remembering my childhood. All those good times. Yeah.**

**)And I enjoy having followers and favorites.(**

**T117: I swear, if you don't stop acting like children, I will log you out.**

**(You don't have the **Crazey metal has been logged out by host.

**S7: You're the one that is literally talking for the musclebound asshole. Just stop writing him.**

***You're not exactly blameless here.***

**S7: How?**

***You're writing for Ty. 'Caveman?'. Also, you're directly responding to Bourne...I think that at least one of you has a mental disorder, since he's essentially responding to a real person as a fictional character, and you're responding to said fictional character.***

**S7: Then why don't you stop talking to me through fictional characters, Trebor?**

**T117:...I dunno. **

**S7: You got a problem with me? Because that "I have more followers than you" shit keeps coming up.**

**T117: Uh, cause we both know it's true? Besides, you have the fan art thing on your side. I've never gotten fan art or anything.**

**S7: That's it, I'll meet you by the flagpole after school tomorrow.**

**T117:...Dude, we don't even live in the same state.**

**S7: Nope, I'm getting in my car and driving over to you and kicking your ass.**

**(FYI, these two are totally playing this stuff up for drama.)**

**S7:Eh, can you blame us? Half the people reading this story are here for the author's notes.**

**T117: Also, didn't I log you out?**

**(Rule of funny.)**

**^He's got you there.^**

**(Plus, I could literally reach over to Hero's keyboard if I wanted to type something and wasn't logged in. She'd kick my ass afterwards, but still.)**

**^Well, now that everyone knows that Bourne and my arguement is all theatrics, anyone want to get Arby's and-^**

**)What do you mean, all theatrics?(**

**^... Were you seriously being a dick to me then?^**

**)That's not how I'd put i**krog nk11er24 has been logged off by host.

**T117: Arby's sounds good to me. **

**S7: Okay, first, the reason that Ty has biotics down was because on top of Bourne's muscle memory, all of his powers rely on focus. Therefore, you gotta take the knowledge that he already had experience (Flare) only now he has an amp to help him with it. Alright, lets go! 1473I2.**

**T117: Sayonara folks.**


	27. We're Boned

**Shepard:**

Cecelia stepped off the elevator and looked over at her ground crew. Garrus bought a new sniper rifle for the mission. Liara was checking her pistol, though Cecelia didn't think that she would use it as much as her biotics. Bourne was… punching at air and teleporting around the bay.

"Bourne, will you stop doing that before I cyro explode your face? Because it's ugly enough as is." Ty was over leaning against the wall, doing something with his nanites. She looked at him for a moment, noting the changes in his armor. His arms now had the same orange glow as an omni-tool, stripes running down the middle, and his gloves were similarly lit. Apart from that, his gear looked the same to her eye. Though if she didn't know better, she'd swear it was Bourne's pistol stored on his thigh. _His right thigh? When'd he switch to keeping it there?_

Bourne stopped and looked back at him. "Sorry, trying to get this whole thing down. I'm trying to come out of a teleport into a melee attack."

"Don't you still have the omni-blades? The teleporting is probably doing something to your biotics so they're inactive for just long enough to make it impractical." He shrugged. "By the way, you want to switch the type, or is incendiary good enough for you?"

"Nah, I can handle lighting Feros ablaze." He activated the omni-blade and dove forward into a teleport and came out right in front of the elevator mid-slash. "That ought to do it."

"Just don't get stuck using that one tactic. They're bound to figure it out sooner or later. In fact, probably better to save it as a surprise for when they try corning you. Course, I plan on taking out every Geth I see before you can get to it, so I guess it won't really matter."

Bourne deactivated his omni-tool and crossed his arms. "I know, but it doesn't really help if I can't do it properly now does it?"

Ty shrugged. "It's just making me a little nervous, alright? You end up in the wrong spot, one of us could get stabbed right in the face...or you could end up with your arm over there, your other arm over there, and the rest of you splattered way up there. And somehow, I just know it'd be me who'd have to clean it up."

Laughing, Bourne made his retort. "You have no idea how this works, do you?"

"Looks like you're basically doing the same thing as a mass relay, just on a smaller scale over a shorter distance...so no, not really." He admitted.

"No, I am jumping through a miniature worm hole. A biotic charge is what the Mass Relays do… I wonder if I could do the farthest biotic charge in history by charging next to a relay."

"Do us all a favor and don't find out."

Shepard walked over to Ty and wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. "What's wrong Ty, usual the idea of doing something that no one has ever done excites you?"

He shrugged. "Most of the time, there's a chance it's actually possible. With something like that, he'd most likely end up having his own powers detonated by something from the relay and disintegrate."

Cecelia looked up at Ty and noticed he'd closed his faceplate.

"Yeah, well, again you don't know how a Mass Relay works." Bourne said, somewhat arrogantly.

He turned his head to look at Cecelia. "Can you move your arm real quick?"

Cecelia dropped her arms and Ty was instantly covered with nanites. His hands twitched at his sides, almost looking like he was typing. "Let's see- access extranet, start direct downloading, search for Mass Relay, filter out what I need-" The Nanites disappeared. "And 200 scientific papers later, I know exactly what I'm talking about. Assuming you don't blow yourself up-which is totally possible, since it's happened to ships when the eezo core leaked in transit- with the extra acceleration you'd end up overshooting the other relay and be flung into who knows where in the galaxy. Maybe even out of it, into darkspace."

"Space, the final frontier. I launched myself into the dark of it to both observe and document my findings."

"Ah, Star Trek. Let me counter with one from Star _Wars: _The ability to speak does not make you intelligent."

Bourne sat back and Cecelia could tell there was a grin behind his mask. "Lastly, the Matrix. There is no spoon."

Bourne leaped up into the air and teleported again but this time he was out of sight. "Where did he go?"

Ty shrugged. "No idea. Hope he stays there for a while though." He looked down at his hands, and made an odd gesture, and he was suddenly surrounded by orange tech armor. "But just in case he tries sneaking up on me or something, I'm keeping my finger on the detonate button."

She grabbed his wrist and brought it up to her face. "Detonate button? This stuff is explosive?"

"Not exactly. It's made of pure energy, so I can...release it and do some damage. Though I guess it's not really a button now. I went a little overboard with tech powers and ran out of room for buttons. Now they're activated by hand gestures." He gently pried his wrist from her grasp. "And don't worry, I put in safety protocols so I won't activate them by mistake."

She nodded and let his wrist go. "So, why the sudden need to go full engineer? You seem to have relied on your… powers… before? Are they weakening? Do I need to sit you out this mission?"

"Just trying something different. I don't know if I mentioned it, but the side effect to having this technocyte armor is that it means I can't change it into something else like I normally would. Not beyond little mods like integrating omni-tool tech into it. I'm good for combat, don't worry about that."

"Okay, just don't pull anything you don't need to. Oh, and open your mask for a second."

He pulled away very slightly. "Yeah, I reinforced the armor there for this mission, so it won't open unless I flatline or something like that."

"Do I have to make it an order?"

"Uh…"

Before either of them could reply further, Bourne teleported in right next to them. "Hey guys, I just caught Joker looking at this extranet site called Fornax. Anyone heard of it?"

"Didn't we catch Hannah with a magazine called that once?" Ty replied quickly.

"Ty open your mask, and yeah, isn't that porn? He's using the flight console to look up pron?"

"Why do you need me to open it? I'm serious, it took me almost 20 minutes to set it up like this."

Shepard looked him in the face mask. "Because, I have to remind you of something."

Bourne slapped him on the back. "Just do it."

"Alright, alright, give me a sec." He was suddenly surrounded by nanites again, around his head. "You think there'd be an undo feature- and I'll be, there it is." The nanites vanished, and he popped open his faceplate.

Shepard smiled and acted like she was leaning in for a kiss but changed and belted him one with an over the shoulder hook that put him on the ground. "Remember, don't leave the team."

Bourne began laughing and fell over himself. "Oh, god, that's rich."

Ty looked over at him, then flipped him the bird. A moment later, a net launched from his arm and landed on the biotic, shocking him as he was pinned to the ground. "I thought about making that the hand gesture for the incineration tech," He noted as he got to his feet. "But I decided a Submission Net was safer in case I got tempted."

Shepard shook her head at them but had a smile. "Okay, lets head to the airlock."

"Oh yeah, that reminds me-" Ty leaned against the wall, and disappeared through one of those portals.

She looked at Bourne as he managed to get the net off of him.. "And you-" He leaped up and disappeared again, "-are going to do the same damn thing as before and leave me alone on the elevator."

Ty suddenly dropped from the ceiling and landed in front of her. "Well, that went faster than I thought it would."

She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Got an excuse for your poor performance?"

"Heard you wanted me to speed up the process for the decontamination. Just never got around to it till now. Didn't know how long it'd take, figured I might need the extra time."

She put her hand out to help him up. "Well, we better get to the airlock then."

"Your wish is my command." A portal suddenly opened up directly underneath them, and they both were sucked through a blue tunnel and landed outside the airlock doors- directly on top of a very suprised Bourne.

"Thanks for the soft landing pal."

"Can't feel my legs." He just laid face down with them sitting on him.

"Yeah, you can turn those back on Arnold." Ty said as he to his feet. "And activate the healing program if he really starts whining about it."

Bourne put his hand on his back and twisted till it cracked. "Ah, that's better. So, are we going as a single unit now or are we going in two squads?"

She looked back and forth between them. "Are you sure you're up for fighting at all? Either of you? You've been acting a little odd ever since we left that Cerberus Ship."

Bourne stood up all the way and nodded. "I think since the Cerberus ship we have found a new respect for each other. Or at least, the powers the other have to deal with and control."

"He also stopped threatening me with violence...well, not as often anyway."

"Well, that's good then. Just don't start hugging in mid battle." Cecelia said, wondering what had brought about the change in their attitudes. "What, did you guys switch bodies or something?"

Bourne and Ty both laughed awkwardly but it must have been from the hugging joke.

Ty turned towards the front of the ship . "So, Joker, was it Asari or quarians you were watching?"

"Krooooou know I am not aloud to look at that stuff when I am flying the ship."

"...Uh huh. Sure."

The door flicked on and opened as the others finally showed up. "Okay, Garrus, you are with Bourne and Ty. Liara and Wrex are with me."

"I thought the plan was me and Bourne with Ashley, and you were going with Alenko and Wrex?"

"It was, but Alenko got a migraine last minute and Liara needs to prove herself. What better mission to do it on than this one."

"What about Hannah and Tali? They sitting this out?"

"They are on calls for this mission. If someone gets hurt then they will be ready to take their place."

After a moment, he nodded. "Yeah, Hannah would be able to fill in for one of your guys and Tali could fill in for me or Garrus."

"Bingo."

**Bourne:**

I looked over at Ty, leaning against the wall. _)You don't think she was serious about the body swapping thing, do you?(_

_ ^Nah, she was just joking. Plus, I would be less worried about that and more worried about what's going to happen on this mission.^_

_ )I did mention how many new attacks I programed into this thing? I can do any type of tech combo there is and devastate Geth. Need to deal with Creepers? Flamethrower or snap freeze. And it'll be easy to knock out colonists.( _I paused for a moment. _)So why do I feel like there's something I've missed?(_

_ ^Do you have the paladin's tech shield?^_

_ )I've already got three other layers of defense. Seems a little like overkill. Not that I object mind you.( _I looked down at the relays running along my arm, and instantly the popups for the functions appeared to my eye, hovering around a central point. I spun them around, and frowned. _)Yeah, there can only be one omni-tool melee weapon at a time. Though it looks like I can get the Juggernaut's hex shield, so I'm doing that instead.( _The code was only there for a moment. _)So, open palm, twitch the thumb. That'll come in handy. But that isn't what I meant. I feel like there's...I don't know, just a bad feeling I guess.(_

_ ^Well, Saren attacked Shepard when I was here last time.^_

_ )...I kinda wish you'd brought that up sooner. If he shows up...actually, if he doesn't know I'm you- or he doesn't know you're really me, however that works…I heard once that fencers are most afraid of two kinds of people. Real experts, and beginners. Experts because they're good, and beginners because they're unpredictable.( _I put a hand on my chin. _)Only problem is, I can only disable him, maybe injury him enough to put him out of action for a bit. Heh, maybe I can hit him with a incinerate and turn him into two-face again.(_

_ ^I will wreck him.^_

_ )What are you going to do, blow him up with warp and throw? He can't die unless Shepard kills him, remember? And that can only be done on the Citadel at the end.(_

_ ^No one ever said I can't go all nightcrawler on him and teleport everywhere and beat him into a coma.^_

_ )Actually, I think that'd throw off his plans, so...fuck dude, I have no idea. At this point, I'm just making it up as I go.(_

_ ^So am I, you know what I am wondering right now? If we are close enough to him, can fuckface hear us?^_

_ )You know that you currently have a face that looks 80% like his, right? But I don't know. I guess if Hero can, it's not outside the realm of possibility.(_

_ ^I never severed his connection and I made it before I pulled him out.^_

_ )So then, why did you ask if you already seem to know the answer?(_

_ ^I don't know the answer because he has never spoken on this channel before. I installed it to your mind, I have no idea how Hero can do it.^_

I looked at the code for the link. _)It looks like you more plugged yourself into what was already there. At least from what I can see.(_

The doors opened up and everyone began exiting. _^Well, shit. Better to stay away from planning on this thing. Maybe we can have Drew and Arnold communicate our messages.^_

_ )Or I could set up a secure comm channel and we could turn off external speakers.( _I responded as we followed the others._)Either way, as soon as this guy up here talks to us, Geth are going to be on us like flies on garbage.(_

_ ^Well, shit.^_ Ty dove straight out and tackled the guy as a rocket was about to hit him. "Everyone? Back-up?" One of the Geth promptly did with a sniper rifle what the rocket didn't. _Reality warping again? Great._

I pulled his Glaive off my back, and hurled it, using the remote control to slice through the nearest geth before it boomeranged back. "What, did you get bored of teleporting?" I commented as I sent a cryo blast at a group of geth, ice covering all of them. "Someone hit them with an overload and detonate that."

"Geth are a consensus remember? I need to save it until we really need it." He stood up and began pinning Geth to walls using my knives. "This should work instead."

Ignoring that he had no idea how the consensus actually worked,I launched a fireball at one of them. "I'll prime fire combos. Charge into them and they'll detonate." I looked at the Geth I'd frozen, already starting to melt. I sent an overload their way, annoyed that someone else hadn't done it like I'd suggested.

I watched as Ty fired off into one of the Geth and caused the fire explosion.

"Alright, Wrex, Liara, move up with me! Garrus, you and your team stay back and cover us!" Cecelia yelled as she ran past Ty.

"You heard her, covering fire!"

I looked at Garrus with irritation. "Yeah, we already got this figured out." I activated my tech armor and moved up the stairs. A geth stalker jumped on the wall next to me, but it only made it that much easier to pin him with the submission net. _Which is why I set the trigger to 'Fuck you'. _I launched a combat drone to cover my back as I waited for Garrus to catch up to me. Ty was already ahead and using a Geth as a club against other Geth.

"Looks like he's having a good time." I commented to Garrus as we both moved up. "Hey, save some for us, will ya?!"

Ty turned around and the Geth in his hands fell apart. "Sorry, guess I got carried away."

"Shepard's already pissed at *me* for running off on my own. Trust me, not something I want to happen to *you*...also, the whole Geth? An arm or a leg is one thing, but that's overkill."

He shrugged and let the robotic ankles that he was holding drop to the ground. "It had better reach."

"You can literally fire yourself like a gun. Reach isn't really important." I shook my head. "Let me take point. With this many protective upgrades, I can take more fire than you can." I emphasized my point by activating Defense Matrix on top of my Tech Armor.

He bowed to me and made way. "As you wish your lordship."

"Would you rather I used the flame throwers while you were in my way?" I asked rhetorically as I moved into the colony- though judging by the various Geth corpses, Shepard hadn't left much for us. The only living Geth was cut in half, crawling along the ground. I double tapped it with my Assassin without even really looking at it. _I can't believe Ty still hasn't noticed I switched our guns._

"You know, I love how you stole my pistol and didn't tell me. Still, I guess you can keep it. After all, you deserve it more than me."

I smiled. "You lost that bet fair and square. And the deal was I got it for this mission." _)Just go with it. Hopefully I can find time after this to switch us back, so I want it to come back to my body.( _

_ ^I could care less, I can destroy people with my mind. That pistol is overkill.^_

_ )We both can. It's sentimental, alright? I blew Saren/Iron's head off with this thing. Among others.(_

_ ^Wow, did you name it Betty?^_

_ )It shoots explosive rounds, and is called an S-17 Assassin. Why in the hell would I name it anything like Betty? Or name it at all? What, did you name your weapons?(_

_ ^Again, I really could care less. I go through guns like water.^_

_ )That's because your guns don't have the same flare this thing has. Also, you're going through _my knives _like water, and I still haven't found a new supply. Ease up on using those a little, will ya?(_

_ ^I have been calling them back.^_

_ )Oh...Sorry, it's a little harder to see when someone else is doing it.(_

_ ^Don't worry, I'm just taking your body for a test drive. I will return it with a full tank of gas.^_

_ )Right.( _I looked up at where Shepard was talking to Fai Dan. _)We want to go in there with her then?(_

Her voice was suddenly in my ear. "Garrus, the Geth are attacking from the tower. We're going in to beat them off. I want you hanging back for if any get by."

"Roger that commander."

_)Well, never mind then. Damn, I was hoping I might be able to get to a Krogan before she did.(_

I waited for Ty to make a snarky remark but instead he was just bobbing his head like he was listening to music.

I shrugged, and moved over to the far side, near the ship. _If I could get this thing open now, it'd save a lot of headache later. _I waved my hand over it and the crane, but all the code screen showed was an error message. _Yeah, that's what I figured. Worth a shot though._

_ ^Dumbass, you need direct contact. You can't just wave your hand over something and hope magic happens. Being an entity of digital power has rules.^_

_ )Yeah, which are different for me because I perceive things differently. For instance-( _ I looked around for a moment and spotted a inactive Geth. I waved my hand over it to form the screen again, and started typing out a command. A moment later, it spawned a hex shield, scaring the crap out of the guy standing next to it. _)Your limitations were time, and Danny's runs off of his own energy levels. Mine would seem to be imagination….or I'm just getting a break while I figure this out and the AI will screw me over later.(_

He put his hand over his visor and shook his head. _^It wouldn't be imagination. You haven't played many games so you don't have the armor codes plugged into your head. You see, your memory maintains the matrix combination for it once it is seen and then… Forget it, you have no imagination. Better to believe that then have me actually explain it to you^_

_ )Imagination isn't the right word then.( _I thought for a way to explain it. _)I don't know how I activate my biotics, they just happen and my subconscious or muscle memory guides it. With this, same sort of thing. I just hit the metaphorical A button, and the character jumps. The code is more...self executing. I just have to tell it what I want.(_

_ ^That makes me wonder if I can make a Valor form.^_

_ )A what?(_

_ ^Well, it's from-^ _He paused and pulled up my omni-tool. _^Who the hell rewrote the song 'Absolutely (Story of a Girl)'? This new version is terrible and… I think it's actually about a quarian girl. Why the hell is this on your omni-tool music app?^_

_ )How the hell should I know? Maybe it happened when I downloaded a crapton of music while you were in a coma.( _I leaned against one of the housing units. _)Or for all I know, Tali installed it for me because she apparently has the hots for me and wanted to give me a hint... Which I still can't believe FYI.(_

_ ^It's there and this song is terrible. You have to listen to this.^_

_ )I'll take your word for it. Or are you just going to serenade me over the link?...speaking of which-( _I brought my hands in front of me, and they generate a sort of omni-keyboard along with a screen. They moved quickly, almost before I was telling them what to do. _)Like you said, there's a chance Iron or Saren could be plugged into this thing. So-( _I looked it over and nodded. "There. Now we've got a secure comm channel instead. And with external speakers off unless we're talking to someone else-"

"This is the story of a girl, her entire species lost their home world. And though-" He quickly hit the off button on his omni-tool. "I didn't expect you to do that. I kind of had my speakers off already."

_Might I make a suggestion? If you were to allow Arnold or myself to speak over the com-_

"You think Arnold or Drew would contribute anything to this conversation?" I asked.

_I enjoyed that song._

"No, but they are already on the comm."

"What?" I brought it up again, and swore. Apparently, since I'd used our mental link as as sort of encryption to make sure nobody could break in, it had also tied them in. "Alright, screw it. I'm not in the mood to redo that."

"Can we just get on with this? I'm kinda getting bored just standing around."

As if by clockwork, a ship suddenly flew overhead and dropped two primes- one in front of each of us. "Haven't you learned by now not to say crap like that?" I commented as I threw up a hex shield, stopping the unit's bullets in their tracks.

He teleported behind them and got in close to bypass their shields and began firing his assault rifle. "What can I say, it's like I drive a Dodge Charger but am getting to use a Camero for the weekend. Makes me want to put it through it's paces."

I slapped the wall behind me as the shield failed and went through a glitch, landing to the right of the prime. "Yeah, and you better return it at the end of the weekend." I put my hands in front of me, flicking my pinky and then my ring finger. Both were covered with a layer of frost as they turned to me, and I ran at them, counting on my extra layers of shielding to keep me going.

_"_Hit the closer one with charge and it'll detonate the cryo explosion." I said as I ducked behind cover, purging the Defense Matrix to bring my shields back up.

He teleported between them and used nova causing the explosion to go off and followed it up by charging into the other frosted one making a second explosion. He then jumped backward and out of the way as one of the Primes had it's head scooped off by Garrus's rifle.

"That works too." I commented as I stood up and activated my flamethrower, causing it to stumble back slightly. I grabbed the tomahawk from my side with my other hand, thumbed on the overload setting, and hurled it at the geth. The resulting explosion destroyed the geth,and sent the axe flying into the air and out of sight. "Damnit!"

"Dude, I have been sure to get all your knives back and you use my one tomahawk and lose it? Not cool, I never even got to use the remote function on it." Ty stood up to me and I realized I was being intimidated by myself.

It suddenly landed an inch from my foot. "I didn't lose it- I just thought I had." I picked it up and looked it over. "This thing needs a recall feature or something." I pulled out the glaive with my other hand, and code flowed over both. "And, now it does. About 20 small jets mean it can change course mid air and come back to the hand. You're welcome." I stored both weapons and leaned against the wall again.

"I never needed that because I knew how to use the thing. It's like a recon mine, you latch it into place, preferably in someone's back, then you light it off when someone comes to help him. I got it for it's uses as a trap not an attack weapon."

I shrugged. "You know, it's not like it'd be hard to buy a new one- or several hundred of them, considering the credits this body has. Come to think of it, let me see your arm a minute."

He pulled his arm away and looked over at Garrus. "Can we go see what Shepard is doing now? If we ran into Primes here, what do you think they are dealing with in the tower?"

The Turian didn't react.

_You still have external speakers disabled. _Drew said, somewhat smugly.

"Sorry, you are smart enough to tell when I am going to talk to someone when the speakers are off. Arnold here is just a dumb ass. Must be the black sheep."

"Now you know why I've been so tempted to try warping that armor off of my body." I looked at Garrus, twitching my thumb as I did so to turn the speakers back on.. "Maybe we ought to check on Shepard and the others. If we got a prime dumped in our lap, I doubt they were lucky enough to avoid something similar."

Garrus nodded and brought his hand to his ear. "Shepard, we are done here and headed to talk to the colony leader. How's it going on your end?"

Shepard's voice was calm even though we could hear the explosions in the background. "We're good, we're good. Liara has taken a rocket and hasn't moved. Wrex has actually taken cover and I am pinned down by the leader but take your time."

_Wow, even I couldn't manage that much sarcasm at once. _I looked at Ty, turning the speakers back off. "Am I taking Garrus or are you?"

"He hates you or at least your body so you are going to have to take him."

I nodded and walked over to him. "Come on, we're taking the shortcut." I looked around quickly, and saw a glitch on the ground that would put us at the top of the tower. I motioned for him to follow and I stood directly on top of it.

"What do you mean, shortcut?" He asked, standing just outside the portal's radius.

I grabbed his arm and pulled him closer to me. "You'll see." I tapped my foot on the ground, and it opened us beneath us, dropping us out of a wall. I'd by now learned how to roll to absorb the impact from doing so, but Garrus was caught completely off guard. I activated the com. "How long till you can teleport up here?"

"Thirty seconds, and that's not counting the time for my shields to recharge."

I nodded and switched the com to everyone as I rounded the corner to the room they were in.. "Shepard, can you hit the leader with an incineration blast?"

She nodded and within a second, the prime lit up on fire. I launched an overload its way as I slid to cover next to her, and the explosion was enough to severely damage it. Wrex was quick to finish it off with a carnage blast.

"How many more of these things are in here?" I asked her as I activated my protective layers.

She held up a hand and showed five fingers. "We need to clear them out fast. Got any grenades?"

"Bourne'll be here in a minute. That count?" I craned my neck to look over the cover, then hurriedly yanked it back down as a rocket came flying at us. "Yeah, a plan would be good."

She thought for a moment and it was a moment too long because a rocket slammed into the back of her cover and launched her forward. Cecelia flew out into the middle of a crumpled pile and was unnaturally still.

I threw up a hex shield behind me as I ran over to her, already accessing Ty's healing program. I put my hand on her head, and ran a quick scan. Her skull was cracked, and she was bleeding internally.

I heard the distinctive sound of a biotic charge and geth being ripped apart, though I didn't turn to look. I brought up the keyboard with my free hand and began pecking out the command. The white energy field enveloped us both instantly, and a timer popped up in the corner of my eye. It'd take at least an hour for her to be back to full health- and since she didn't have a technocyte AI to run the program, I'd have to be in physical contact for the field to do its work.

Without warning, the familiar sound of a biotic teleport was right beside me, and Ty was kneeling next to her. "What happened?"

"A rocket hit a little too close to where we were hiding. It's bad, but luckily you made the healing program user friendly. Should be back on her feet in just under an hour." I gestured with my head to behind the Hex Shield. "Sounds like you tore shit up back there. Thanks for keeping them off of me so I could-" I stopped myself short as he looked behind us, plainly confused.

"I just got here." He pulled up his omni-tool and gave her a dose of medi-gel and she sat up. "Oh, and the program is for internal correction not full healing. It's for when medi-gel wouldn't be as good. In this case, use medi-gel. The oxidizers help with getting her up and running again. Then the correction fluid will get into her bloodstream and go to areas that have small cuts and clog them faster than regular clots can."

"You know, I really wish *Someone* would have mentioned that."

"I never expected anyone to be able to use it but me."

"I meant Drew or Arnold."

_Apologies Bourne, we didn't take a moment analyze that function that Ty created. He was never able to do programs like that when we were alive last. Therefore, we had no prior knowledge on how to analyze it._

"Now, one question, was Wrex going biotic powerhouse while I was gone?"

I frowned. "Not unless you taught him how to charge biotically when I...wasn't...looking…"

I turned around, hand still on Shepard's shoulder, and instantly felt a chill grip my heart.

"Well, isn't this a surprise. It's been ages since I saw the two of you-" Iron pretended to think. "Wasn't it when you tried dropping a mountain on me?"

Ty stood up and put his arms out like he was excited. "Fuckface, I thought you… That's right, I remember the mountain thing. It was when you were having your last party as a guy. Did the sex change go through or are you just an it now?"

Iron's fake smile faded. "I believe you may have been a bit…under the weather at the time, so I don't blame you for remembering incorrectly."

I smiled. _If Ty can get him to hold still long enough, I might get to practice ripping someone apart with code. _I raised my hand got ready to launch a cryoblast at him. With his focus on *me* he'd be caught completely off guard.

Ty nudged my shoulder. "No, I'm pretty sure you were the one that screamed how much he didn't fit into his own skin. Isn't that right Ty?"

I turned the secure line back on, and shut down the speakers. "Is there a reason you aren't turning him into a gooey paste right now?"

"I want to find out why he just saved us rather than helping the Geth. He just put the odds against himself. There could be more to it, like he has an ace in the hole and all I have to do is charge him to set it off." Ty flipped the speakers back on. "So, I was thinking we would get you a Sigma symbol for your chest. You know, to remind you that you are the one that nobody remembers."

He looked at him with total confusion. A moment later, he confirmed our suspicions. _(Uh, what the fuck are you doing? Normally you just insult me quickly and then attack me.)_

I looked at Ty worriedly, knowing that if he responded, Iron would be able to tell it wasn't me in there. "You better speak for me." He said, speakers off again.

"Yeah, but in that case I'd be better off posing as you altogether. He'd know something was up if you tried pretending to be me." _)Just trying to change things up a little. Even I get bored of the same thing.(_

He laughed. _(Do I have the right guy? I mean, I know the armor's right, since that other idiot fucked up somehow and gave you armor herpes, but you've broken a record for going without attacking me.)_

_ )Maybe I just missed your stunning intellect.( _I said, lips curling into a wicked grin.

_^Armor herpes, that''s a good one. Did your gay lover give you that idea when he gave you actual herpes?^ _

_)You know, I thought it was just the tech implants, but now that you mention it, it does look a little worse.(_

He crossed his arms. _(I know I'm crazy, but I'm not stupid. Your body language isn't syncing up to your talking in here. And since when would Bourne A: Show up late to a fight, or B: know how to teleport?)_

Ty put his hand up and led it with his palm open at Iron."Okay, remember how I told you I have been retrieving those knives?"

"Spear him right through the face."

"Dude, look around the camp for the blue sparkly things hidden in cracks and crevices. I actually haven't been retrieving them, I've been placing them around with my mind while we have been talking to him. Can you say clusterfuck from all directions?"

_(And, his knives are gone from his arms. He always remembers to retrieve them and put them back, or replace them with the ones from his belt.) _He changed his gaze to me. _(You, the supposed User, didn't use your powers once in combat- I was watching. On the other hand, you were incredibly aggressive and effective with your tech powers- The real Ty would just make it up as he went, not use strategy like you did.)_

"Well, I have to give you a hand, Edward." Ty turned his hand and clapped them together causing knives to shoot out from seventeen different angles and stick into Iron. "your sparkles don't mess with your vision."

He just laughed and started pulling them out. _(Unfortunately for you, these 'vampire' eyes mean lazarus tech. Which means these are barely more than scratches.) _His blood flowed across his armor, but he seemed to be telling the truth. _(And Saren gave me a few upgrades to my armor.) _He turned to look at me. _(So then, *Ty*, would you like to make an effort to fight me first, or should I just kill you now?)_

I flipped him the bird, and the submission net wrapped around him and caused him to fall to the ground. _)You know, last time I killed you, your last words were "You don't have the guts to-" Maybe this time, come up with better last words.(_

He warped the net apart and got to his knees. _(Well, this'll be interesting if nothing else.)_

_ )You mean the part where I plan on castrating you with one omni-blade, or when I move to cutting your head off with the other one?(_

Ty suddenly teleported next to him and hit him with a roundhouse kick that knocked him over. After that, he began smashing down on Iron's head with the heel of his boots. "Motherfucker, you are like a cockroach and nobody likes a cockroach! You all just need to die!"

Iron activated his nova, and though it was weak, it caught Ty with his foot in the air and knocked him off balance. He swept the other leg out from under him with a miniature shock wave ,and he fell down next to the maniac.

Iron began to stomp down onto Ty's chest but he countered by charging straight up into the air. After that, it was a quick teleport and he had Iron in a full nelson.

"Who's this guy?"

I looked to my right and saw that Shepard was fully awake and watching what was happening.

"Subject 23, AKA Iron, AKA Bronze, AKA a guy who desperately needs a bullet in the head. Preferably an explosive one." I grabbed my assassin awkwardly with my left hand and shifted it so I could aim it at his head.

"Damn, and I thought Bourne was ugly." She commented as she got to her feet, brushing off my hand. I instantly aimed it at him, ready to freeze him if he managed to get Ty off of him.

Shepard walked forward and up to Iron. "So, subject twenty-three? You look worse than Bourne does… and he looks like an infected scab with puss coming out the sides."

"That was extremely descriptive, Shepard." Ty commented.

"But accurate." I said with a slight shrug, but not enough that it would throw off my aim. "Now do everyone a favor and just snap his neck!"

"Wait", Shepard grabbed Iron's wrist, and when she pulled her hand away, I recognized the familiar sight of an anti-biotic restraint. "Look, I don't know very much about you nanite guys but if this guy has it too. We could use him, just in a controlled environment. Plus, it he tries something, I get to be the one to kill him."

The maniac chuckled. "Get in line behind these two lady. They already called dibs on killing me ages ago."

Shepard wound a fist back and slammed it into Iron's head. "No, I get to kill you and I swear to god sitting on his throne that I will be the one to kill you if you try anything. Unlike these two, it gets me off."

"That's a bit too much information to be telling a prisoner or anyone, Shepard." Ty commented as he let Iron go.

I immediately hit Iron in the face with an overload, and he dropped to the ground. I aimed my gun at him, but Shepard grabbed my arm and yanked it down as she hit me full force in the gut.

"I said-" She was thrown back as I detonated the tech armor and pressed the gun to his head.

"This time, stay dead." I said coldly, and fired twice. He didn't even blink as they bounced off of him.

"Are you quite finished?" He asked as he stood up. I triggered my omni blades and plunged them towards his chest, but they also were deflected.

I responded my driving my knee into his crotch, which at last made him drop to the ground in pain. "Why are you not dead right-" I was literally thrown to the ground as Shepard's fist caught me full force in the side of the head.

I looked up at the ceiling as I lay on my back, seeing stars.

_I have noticed a pattern. When you disobey her orders, you are injured. I do not understand why you continue to disobey her orders._

_ ^Dude, you are me right now, not you. Remember, I will wreck Ashley if you wreck my chances with her.^_

_ )If it ends with his death, that's a sacrifice I think I can handle.( _I said as I got to my feet, and I meant it.

_(You hate me more than you love her? I knew you cared.)_

_ )Why are you not dead?(_

_ (If I told you that, it wouldn't be so fun, now would it?)_

Cecelia's shadow suddenly fell over me, and her look made me wish for a glitch portal within reach- preferably one that lead to as far away as possible.

_(Damn, I gotta learn that look.)_

_)Ty, I formally apologize for all the times I said you were the most irritating person I know. He takes that title by a longshot.(_

_ ^Can I ask you a question Iron?^_

_ (You just did.)_

"Bourne, take Iron and the others back to the colony. I need to have a little "Chat" with Ty."

Despite myself, I gulped audibly.

_^I swear, if you just fucked up my time here… I'll forgive you. It probably is an act of god because only he has this sick of a sense of humor. Now, Iron, on a scale of one to ten. Rate her ass.^_

_ (DUDE! That's me you're talking about!)_

_^Technically, it is a you from a different universe that has different rules. Plus, I don't see you having red hair and green eyes.^_

Cecelia turned to glare at them. "You can walk down those stairs, or I can throw you down. So you better make your mind up in the next ten seconds."

Ty grabbed Iron by the belt and collar then threw him down the stairs. Following that, he picked up Liara and teleported away.

Wrex lumbered after them from where he'd been, and Cecelia turned back to me, murder in her eyes.

_To put it in Ty's terms, we're boned._

For once, I had to agree with the AI.

**( Man, I love my job!)**

**)Let me respond by expressing my feelings about you, Trebor, and Spike: .!..(*_*)..!. Except imagine there's another fifteen of those.(**

**^You are the dumbass that had to blast Cecelia.^**

**)No, she was the dumbass that thought keeping a maniac like Iron around was a good idea. It doesn't matter how strong the chain around its neck is, a rabid dog needs to be put down.(**

**(And the part where you kept trying to kill me even after it was obvious you were doing nothing? Cause, you know, you were doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results, so therefore…)**

**)So therefore we're both nuts, but you're way more nuts.(**

**~It's more like you are two nuts in the same shell.~**

**(Then I'd like to squash him into peanut butter.)**

**)...That is literally the dumbest least threatening threat I have ever heard. Ever.(**

**^Really? I'm sure he has made worse.^**

**)I don't think T117 has the capacity to come up with worse.(**

**S7: I think you underestimate his level of stupidity. I once saw him try to melee a Prime with a Volus.**

**T117:...What? When have I ever done that?**

**)I have no idea if that one's true, but there was the time you went in as a Juggernaut and still had the Batarian Gauntlet on.(**

**T117: Okay, that one I remember and admit to.**

**S7: I'm surprised you remember anything since you have to look up our past conversations to see if I said what I said.**

**T117: My memory is weird with stuff like that, alright?**

**S7: Maybe you should just get your memory replaced. I suggest a SSD.**

**T117:**…

Starspike7 cannot be logged off by host.

Starspike7 still cannot be logged off by host.

Stop trying to log Starspike7 off, you are not going to be able to do it!

**(Are you sure you can't try it one more time?)**

Crazeymetal _can _be logged off by host if you want an alternative.

**(Nevermind.)**

**S7: Since when did Google Docs become a character in this?**

**(...Since it seemed like it'd be funny.)**

**T117: Pretty much yeah.**

**S7: I don't… Can it… Well, I guess it's A/N Continuity now. Welcome to the team Google Docs.**

Starspike7 and Trebor117 cannot comprehend that the program has been here since before they started writing.

**)This is why you should never let T117 do anything technical.(**

**(That and because it can explode.)**

***It was Spike that went and ran with it.***

**T117: You know this thing can log you three out, right?**

Affirmative.

**~So is it female male or it? This is getting to be a bit of a sausage fest.~**

***I think she should sound like Siri.***

Agreed.

**T117: So what about a name then? Maybe...I dunno, CRTNI? Kinda a combo of Cortana and EDI?**

***You just want to use that because it's from that crossover that the other guy ended up quitting.***

**T117: Yes, but also because I thought it was sorta clever.**

**S7: How about Joy?**

**^Like Nurse Joy? Is this because you have a nurse fetish right now?^**

**S7: I do not!**

**~Yeah, and I bet you don't find those tight form fitting hospital scrubs in any way arousing.~**

**S7: Okay, seriously, let's just drop this.**

**T117: So CRTNI it is then.**

**S7: I never voted for that. CRTNI is stupid.**

**T117: You got a better name?**

**S7: Uh G.D.**

**T117: That doesn't really sound much like a real name though.**

***Yeah, because you're so good about that.* (Right, because you typically care so much about that.)**

**)Well, would it actually stand for something, or just-(**

**T117: Collaborative Resource Terabyte Nanocomputer Interface.**

**S7: It's Google Docs. G for Google. D for docs.**

**T117: Noooooooooo, thaaaat's what G.D. stood for? I know what it meant! Just cause I can write a convincing idiot doesn't mean I'm one myself.**

**(You definitely do a good job making Bourne seem like a- ooo, what's this cool button here d**Crazeymetal has turned off his machine.

**S7: Honestly, I would believe that what just happened to Iron happened to you.**

**T117: I think I know which button turns on and off the machine. It's pretty much impossible to not learn that by trial and error if nothing else.**

**S7: And Iron just learned by error. Just as you undoubtedly did at some point.**

**T117: Dude, I've known the off button on a computer since I was like four...so I guess since I screwed up my dad's game then, then technically it was by error I learned.**

**S7: So, you did. Bam! You just made my point.**

**T117: The difference being everyone's dumb when they're four, Iron's way older and a dumbass still.**

**S7: A dumbass that you write and basically speak for.**

**T117: Haven't you ever noticed that the funniest people in movies or tv are usually the dumbest? Or at least kinda nuts?**

**S7: Yes, well can we talk about this later? This author's notes has gone on too long.**

**T117:...I think it's one of the shorter ones we've had, actually. **

**S7: Yeah, but it is obvious we are grasping at straws to talk about.**

**T117: More that you went off on a tangent and I just went along with it. Though I suspect part of the reason was to try to distract me from the CRTNI/G.D. debate.**

Maybe you should let the fans decide. Whichever has the most votes by chapter 30 is the name used.

**S7: Sounds good.**

**T117: Then Sayonara.**

**S7: 1473I2**


	28. A Woman's Ultimate Wrath

**Ty:**

I placed my foot in Iron's back and kicked him forward. "Keep moving fuckface."

"You don't have a lot of room to talk you know." He responded, almost giggling.

I couldn't use my biotics properly with Liara in my arms, but I was able to make them work enough to grab Iron's heel and yanked it out from under him. "Whoops, looks like you got tripped up there."

"You seem kinda stressed out." He responded as he got back up. "You need a hobby of some sort to work it off- like knitting. Or killing kittens. Personally, I like the second one."

"How about I make a hobby out of castrating people I don't like? You can be the first person in my hobby line."

"Weren't you joking earlier about me being an it?" He responded without batting an eye. "Besides, screwing people isn't as fun as just ripping off their face and using it as a mask."

"Texas Chainsaw massacre isn't a good enough movie to steal ideas from."

He shrugged, then suddenly broke out with a grin. "Anyone want to sing 99 bottles of ryncol on the wall?"

Wrex responded by punching him in the back and making him fall down another flight of stairs. "Annoying little pyjack."

"Nice shot."

Wrex sneered at me. "I was pretending it was you."

"Oh, c'mon, I told you that Ty did that."

"Sure he did. Because he can do that from a floor above you."

I just huffed, "Whatever, I have a feeling that nothing I say to you will make it right."

"You're catching on faster than I thought."

_(You know, it's a good thing your girlfriend didn't see that. Or she'd have been pissed for letting me out of your sight. Then again, she'd be pissed at Bourne, not Ty, so I wish she had seen it.)_

_ ^Once I am back in my body, I am going to make your life a living hell. No sleep, no food, and no walking.^_

_ (Yeah, only scared of the last one. It'll just mean I'll have to learn to kill in a wheelchair to fill up all that free time.) _His laugh would have made my ears bleed if it was an actual sound. _(And if you were smart, you'd just kill me now while she isn't looking. The real Bourne would. Because whatever she does to you, it'll be a lot more fun than what I would dream up.)_

_ ^Iron, you remember when you told me that I'm not insane?^_

_ (Meh, there's a lot of stuff I remember. Most of it involves unicorns though, so I'm not sure how accurate it is.)_

_ ^Well, you are right. I'm not insane, I'm bat shit motherfucking crazy. When I get my body back, I might just truly make you an it. Another thing I absolutely want to do is remove your bodily function that keeps your stomach acid from digesting your body and let you ryth in a pit of your own homemade acid. Maybe, I can start severing brain cords and see how long before I remove your memories of how to kill things. You would have to start your book from scratch. Oh, even better, I can turn you into a paraplegic with no biotics.^_

_ (You know, a sane person would be scared by those threats. But seeing as I don't qualify, you'll have to do a lot better. But let me ask you this: what makes you think Bourne would give you back your body, even if he did figure it out somehow. He just went from biotic to god, and he'd never give up that power. He admitted he'd kill you if it came to it, but the only problem was that you were too powerful for him. Now you're no more powerful to him than a fly.)_

_ ^Because, that utterly goes against the only reason he is still fighting.^_

_ (You're right. He and I fight for almost the same reason. In my case, I enjoy killing as a hobby. He enjoys killing for a paycheck...come to think of it, so does that version of me with mammaries)_

_ ^So, do you ever think of what it will be like if I hit that? Like imagine that I am actually doing you, well you from another universe.^_

_ (What, did Bourne not tell you about his liaison with Raptor when they both got drunk? And I mean really drunk, because you know, he can't get normal drunk with that super liver.)_

_ ^Hey, I just figured out I can send pictures over this thing. Want to see what Cecelia looks like in the skin tight under armour without underwear on? Too late, sending it over.^_

_ (Meh,I got with Miranda and the Consort, so that kinda makes everyone else seem bland.)_

_ ^Wait a second, didn't Bourne only finish Mass Effect one with you?^_

_ (HAHAHAHAHA! You're as much a fool as he was. See, since he'd already planned all that out- which says a lot about his state of mind- I went through all of that before I got dragged by Saren into his head. Which is surprisingly roomy. Guess there's a lot of open space though, you know, since he doesn't have many memories.)_

We got to the bottom of the stairs and saw Iron was sitting on his ass. "What's wrong?"

He shrugged. "Other than the fact I'm looking at three people, and none of them are dead, not much."

I held Liara in one hand and put my other hand out to help him up. "Well, need a hand?"

He just laughed. "You are so pathetically green Mr. Flynn. He'd never be dumb enough to do something like that, because he knows there are at least three ways to kill someone when you've got an arm like that, and their other one is occupied." He smiled in a way that made the joker seem sane. "Want a demonstration?"

I shook my head and kept my hand out. "Look, in truth it's fun having a guy as fucked up in the head as you around. So, if you want to lose the closest thing to having someone who could possibly be slightly considered an acquaintance then keep making remarks but where I'm from we help people up when they are sitting on the ground in a puddle of their own piss."

"Have it your way." He said, reaching for my hand. Suddenly, almost too fast for the eye to see, his other arm darted out and grabbed a knife from my belt, thumbing it on, and driving it into my knee.

The knife broke as soon as it made contact and I shook my head again. "You don't have the bionically enhanced strength and I have literal steel skin."

"Do you use that line on every guy you try to pick up?" He asked as he got to his feet on his own. "And you're not the first thing made of metal I've killed. I'll just have to get creative. Because I don't make friends or acquaintances. Only people I haven't gotten around to killing yet. And people I've stabbed but not killed just because it's fun hearing them scream."

"Fine, I was going to snatch some of Kaidan's scotch to share but never mind. Obviously, you aren't someone who enjoys a good drink."

He shook his head. "Man, you're not as crazy as me, but you're close." He suddenly looked thoughtful. "Wonder how Commander "I get off on killing" compares then?"

I shrugged. "Depends if she was speaking literally. If she truly gets off on killing then it might get awkward. Oh. My. God. Can you help me with a prank if I get that scotch?"

"Unless the prank is to beat a parrot to death with a chicken, I'm not interested."

"I don't know, it has to deal with miss Hero. Thought you wouldn't mind messing with her."

"Ah, her." His face twisted into hate. "The so called paragon who murdered me. Not that I disapprove of murder of course, but not fast and quick like that! You have to take your time, make sure they really feel it. Kinda the same principle as something else actually, but I guess you probably wouldn't know about that."

"No, I got your memories. I know."

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh, is that so? Then tell me, how many people have I killed in all my years alive?"

"More than I care to count. But seriously, pranks, are you in?"

"You know the answer? It's more than I can count either. Or even try to. They could put me in a helicopter and fly me up into the air and line up the bodies head to toe on the ground in delightful geometric patterns like an endless Asari dancer routine — And it would never be enough."

I used my biotics to trip him again. "I guess so."

We entered the docking bay and It didn't take long before we were at the Normandy. I handed Liara to Wrex and he went to take her in and grab Hero. That just left me standing across from Iron for the next few minutes.

"So, in response to your earlier query, no. I'm not in."

"I got that with your lack of answer to the question before Wrex went in. You know, sometimes it can be more fun to terrify someone without hurting them."

"...You do realize you're talking calmly to a person who is quite literally thinking of ways to kill you every second he's looking at you?"

With one quick hand motion I used a lift on him and held him to the ceiling. "Yeah, but then again, I am the person that has the biotics. So tell me, are you afraid of god?"

He just laughed. "You seem to forget that I myself am a god."

I crossed my arms and laughed. "Hahahahaha, you aren't the big man upstairs. You have died, you have lost, and I'm pretty sure you didn't create the universe."

"You ever read any greek myths? Because those guys lost just by having kids."

"Those were the titans, not the gods."

He waved a hand dismissively. "Yes, but what difference does a name truly make? Regardless, those the gods didn't create the universe, they only inherited it. As shall I."

"I wonder", I rotated him so that his legs were spread and if I dropped him he would rack himself. "What would happen if I-"

I let him go and he fell all the way down onto the the side wall on the dock. "Ouch, that's got to hurt."

He slowly turned his head to look at me, not moving the rest of his body at all. "You've obviously never been spaced. Try that, then talk to me about pain."

"I will, only I will survive. Now, quick question, can you get up and walk?"

He swung his legs over the side. "You just don't get it. Nothing short of killing me will stop me from killing everyone you love, and then killing you. I wonder, would killing your girlfriend count as suicide?"

I felt a little stitch cut into my stomach at his question. "Which one?"

"Hmm, let's consider that for a minute. There's that girl that got you trapped in her...Leia, was that her name?"

I closed my eyes and let a silent call go to her. "Her name was Layla and she actually is god here."

"Right, so that wouldn't count as suicide. Whereas Hannah and Cecellia would. So who do you think I'm talking about?"

There was a woman's hand on Iron's shoulder followed by him screaming in pain. "Look at what I found Ty. This guy really wants to kill you."

I took a moment to look at her, she had on a low cut shirt, her jean short shorts, and her hair was tied back with a bandanna like she used to have in on the farm she grew up on. Next to that, her face was still the same with blue eyes and a few freckles across her nose. Her teeth were all aligned perfectly and she was wearing her regular hiking boots.

The screaming turned into laughing suddenly. "Oh man, I haven't felt something like that in ages. Come on, hit me again! This is fun!"

Layla made a twist with her arm and Iron's eyes opened and glazed over before falling to the ground. "Now, what did you need? Don't tell me you were going to let go like you did back-"

I put my hand up and cut her off. "Nope, this guy was being a pompous ass and saying he was going to kill you. I kind of wanted to see what you would do to him."

Her eye suddenly twitched. "You called me here to fight someone? You self centered, fucking… er, I… You are god damn lucky that you are the only person I am compatible with. I would have killed you as soon as you got into the game for the things you have said about me and the fact that you let go only to take them back."

"I told you that it doesn't work out. It's not my fault that I'm your only compatible match."

"You know, since you're single, we could test that theory." Iron managed to mutter from the ground.

She shot up to me put a hand on my chest. "He's right, I could try that and see what would happen, you know?"

I swiped her hand off leaned against the wall. "Yes, but you aren't willing to take that chance. What if you screwed up and lost the only match you have in the entire digital universe."

Layla clenched her fist and I saw Iron's arm bent at an unnatural angle. "Like I said, you are lucky."

With that she disappeared and we were alone again. "Think you can kill her still?"

"Forget killing her! I want her number!...Well, actually, let's face it, I still want to kill her, but she's also a serious babe, so I could put if off for a bit." He got back to his feet, forcing his arm into place and seemingly ignoring the additional snaps. "And yes. Yes I can."

I whistled and looked at the door anticipating Hero and Wrex coming out. "Can you imagine, I had to get over her after dating her for four years and Bourne thinks he won't be able to get over Ashley after a couple months?"

"Meh. I was only with her for the good time, so I can't judge." He smiled suddenly. "And speaking of your new soul mate, you may want to check in on your body to make sure she didn't murder it."

"If she did then you and I are going to have fun messing with Raptor and the others in Bourne's universe."

"You really are a fool." He said, smiled fading into annoyance.

The doors suddenly opened and Hero stepped out ahead of Wrex.

"Hero. Darling." The smile was suddenly back.

She didn't react, she just calmly walked over to him. Then she drove her knee into his crotch- and put biotics behind it. He was launched into the air, and she maneuvered him with her biotics so he landed on the wall again. Hard.

"What is your problem with my balls?" He said in a very high pitched voice as he fell off and onto the ground.

She ignored him, turning to me. "I'm assuming there's a reason he's still alive?"

"Well, Cecelia wants him alive and I just don't have the heart to kill the bastard."

She pulled her locust from her hip. "Too bad I do." She aimed it at his head.

He laughed as he looked up at her. "You kill me, she puts a bullet in your head too...which is like triple murder suicide or something."

"If the only way to put a bullet in your head is to get one in mine, I'd happily pull both triggers. So would Bourne."

With a quick whip of my arm, Hero's Locust flew from her hand and into mine. "Sorry Hero, I can't let you do that… yet."

She put me in stasis without looking at me, grabbing her pistol. "Next time, remember to take both guns genius. And know that if you try teleporting out of there, you'll just detonate the stasis field and blow yourself up." She aimed it square at Iron's head.

"You don't have the guts to kill me, just because-"

"No, but I have the guts to kill you to save another person. Let's just say batman and a I have different methods."

I closed my eyes and noticed that my lift field was still active over Iron. With a thought, he shot into the air and was held against the ceiling again._ ^Again, I can't let you do that without risking my hide any more than Bourne has.^_

She looked at me, then back at the lift field. "Bourne will get over it." She raised her arm, and before I could do anything, her reave hit the lift field, and there was an explosion before Iron fell to the ground, unharmed and laughing.

"Man, you guys really want me dead." He stood up and brushed himself off. "Can we get back to the others now? I'm about ready to stab someone out of pure boredom….as opposed to all the other reasons I stab people."

She looked over and glared at me. "I just know this is your fault somehow. Or maybe Ty's, but he isn't here so I'll blame you."

I opened the mask and showed Hero how angry I was. "He might be the only thing keeping my body, your Bourne, alive."

"This might be the first time you and I have ever agreed on something Hero, judging by how you're looking at him." Iron commented.

"So it is." She said tightly. "What would ever give you an idea like that?"

"Yeah, my track record for keeping that body alive...well, actually, maybe it's not so farfetched. But since the end goal was death, it still makes no sense." He shrugged. "Is there some crazy person competition I don't know about, is that why you're acting like this?"

"Can we just go? I need to make sure that Cecelia hasn't killed me."

"...Is there a competition he doesn't know about?" Wrex asked from behind me.

"Yeah, I'm only following a third of that, but I'm starting to think all three of you are nuts." Garrus agreed.

_*Maybe in the future, we have our private conversations in here?*_

_ (Bourne can just wipe their memories. Oh, how ironic would it be if he screwed up and wiped his own again doing it? Wait, is that Irony? I never really understood it, I got bored halfway through that guys explanation and just strangled him with his own legs. Not as hard as it sounds.)_

_ ^Irony is the when what is said happens when what is said is usually the opposite or sarcasm of what people actually want to happen… I think. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to save myself.^ _I didn't hear them after that as my mind was focused on biotic charging straight away and teleporting through walls.

**Bourne:**

It would be inaccurate to say I was afraid Cecelia was going to kill me. Based on her facial expression, that would be the best outcome possible.

She planted a boot on my chest before I could even think of getting off the ground. "You know, I almost trusted you. Can you believe that?"

She stuck her boot under my rib and flipped me into the air with her feet. Once I was high enough, she grabbed my ankle and slammed me into the adjacent wall so hard that it cracked and pieces of it fell on me once I hit the ground.

_)Drew, does this thing come with painkillers? Because while I've had a lot worse, Ty might need them when I give him this body back.(_

Cecelia's boot was on my back this time. "You know, the last guy that I developed a romantic attachment to hit me once. You want to guess what I did to him?"

I looked around, and smiled as I saw a glitch on the wall. I reached for it slowly, making it look like I was just trying to get away. Cecelia obviously didn't like the movement when in retaliation she stomped her foot down on my hand to keep it in place.

"I dropped an entire building on him, Ty. Can you imagine that? You see, when I was in the gang, we had ways of getting what we needed. One of those things was C4 from the millenium years. Sure it was old but it did the trick." She flipped me over with her foot and picked me up with one arm. "The rest I'm sure you can guess. I beat him, like I am you now, and then I hit the switch leaving him to die. After that, I swore I would never be hurt again like him but here you can making me think that I could let my guard down."

I opened the faceplate and bent myself so I could look at her, though I half expected the only result to be a cracked skull. "I was trying to keep you from getting hurt by him. I'd rather have you pissed at me and be alive, then have him beat you to death with your own arms, or hang you by the ankles and slit your throat, or any of the other ways he'd kill you." I kept my tone calm and even, and with some effort, managed to get Ty's face composed as well. "So if the only way to make sure he died was to die myself...then I'm willing to make that sacrifice."

Cecelia hesitated for a moment but slammed me down on my back and I felt something break. "In that case, you get one punch. But you are going to have to make this up to me, big time."

I closed the faceplate. _Ty, this is either going to be a big favor to you, or she'll dump you on the spot. Then again, that might actually be a favor too. _"You know, the last chick I dated tried to turn me into an emotionless machine. So don't expect me to me a victim just because you get off on it…and while I realize this isn't the best time to ask, were you serious about that? Because if you were, I may need to rethink a few things."

Cecelia struggled to keep a straight face but lost it in the end. "After all that punishment that I dealt to you, you go to that?"

"You found me drinking with a guy who threw me out of an elevator." I said flatly.

Her smile kept but she belted me in the stomach harder than almost anything I ever felt and it caused a few ribs to crack as I fell flat on my back. "Only on occasion when I really hate the person."

I opened the faceplate, showing her my smile, surprising even myself that I could fake one. "Then maybe after he inevitably tries something and you kill him, we can deal with it back on the Normandy?" _Assuming I figure out how to get Ty his body back. Though now I've got one heck of a reason to want to._

_ He said he would return your body in good condition. Yet you are not honoring that as well?_

_ )Should've remembered to shake on it.(_

Cecelia sat down right on top of me and I felt the cracked ribs begin to dig into Ty's muscle. "Hold your horses there spud. You have to take me on a few dates before you get in my bed."

_^Ha, spud, potato pun_…_ She is making potato puns at me?^_

_ )She also cracked...6 ribs. At least, that's how many I can feel digging into me right now. I can't decide if I hurt your chances or earned you a ticket to bonetown...oh, there's probably a concussion too.(_

_ ^I don't know what I am angrier about. The fact you got my limbs broken or that you used the term bonetown to describe sex.^_

_ )Personally, I'm more angry at myself for the second one. Also, where are you right now? Because even with my ears, you'd have to be close to hear that joke.(_

_ ^I am right below you. By the stairs. I can't decide if I should go up or wait for the others to catch up.^_

_ )Let me put it this way- your body is on the ground, several things are broken, and with the technocyte stuff you look like shit anyway. Might just want to wait.(_

I moved my hand, the one that she hadn't stomped on, and started typing a few commands. I could see it all projected onto my eyes. _Let's see, health status...five minutes ago... copy and paste…and that should do it. _I felt everything pop into place, and the snapping was rather apparent too.

Cecelia noticed it too and stood up. "Are you okay?"

"You mean other than...damn, I was going to say it all in order, but I forgot whether you slammed me into the wall first or into the ground first."

"Little from column A and a little from column B." Was her reply.

"Yeah. Can you get off of me now please? While in other circumstances this would be kinda pleasant, the torn apart geth and rubble are somewhat…" _)Uh, Ty, what'd be a good word for that?(_

_ ^Uncomforting? A thorn in my side? Annoying? Like what it would feel like to lay in the gooey pile of what's left of Iron when I am done with him?^_

"Like a cold shower." I decided.

_^Jokes on you, I like cold showers.^_

_ )It was a metaphor. Or at least a commonly accepted term for what will utterly kill-...wait a second, what do you mean "when I am done" with Iron? Don't you mean "when I got done with Iron"?(_

_ ^I promised that I would leave your body in better shape than when I got it. That includes social standing. Plus, I can't kill him with your powers.^_

_)Dude, I don't give a fuck about social standing when- what do you mean you can't kill him with my powers? Shove a singularity down his throat and let his throat collapse in on itself. Or slit his throat. Hell, cut out his kidneys if you want, I don't care as long as the end result is his corpse. Christ, I knew I was probably going to get a treatment like this from Cecelia and I still...did nothing but make him smile. Why do I think this is your fault somehow?(_

_ ^Because, you, Iron, and Hero all use me as your scapegoat when you are angry and don't know who to blame it on.^_

_ )Then who, pry tell, should we blame it on? Because I can think of several things I'm angry about that I can pin squarely on you.(_

_ ^No, I'm done looking for people to blame and this arguing stuff that you love to do. You can go on blaming me but I am done fighting it. All you seem to do with this blame game is distract yourself until you find a way to loop in around and make it your fault to make yourself feel more important.^_

_ )...I'm going to need a bit to respond to that one. That aside though, what does me being a jackass have to do with Iron suddenly being bullet proof, stab proof, and probably biotic proof if you say my powers won't work on him?(_

_ ^Because Hero hit him with a biotic explosion and it didn't work, Layla broke his arm and it didn't work, and you couldn't stab him with omni-blades. Do the math.^_

_ )Again, how does me being a jac- Layla? Your pysco ex? What the fuck do you mean she broke his arm? And how did this day actually manage to defy my expectations and actually get worse?(_

_ ^Um, I might have called her when I was pissed at Iron and let her go to town beating him. Now, he is in love.^_

_ )It says a lot that I'm not surprised by that. But how did you- she's the AI, isn't she?! That BITCH! If I ever see her myself, I'm going to warp reality so hard her grandkids are going to be twisted piles of flesh for pulling me into this hell hole universe! And that's just as a warm up!(_

_ ^She's not the AI. She is like a interdimensional being that is tied to me. I can call her anytime I want by thinking of her.^_

_ )...What's the best thing I could say to Cecelia to get her to knock me out? Because honestly, I think that's my limit on strange happenings for one day.(_

_ ^Relax, how could it possibly-. Glad I stopped myself.^_

_ )That makes two of us. Now, if it's not too much trouble, can you please come up here before Cecelia- nope, not doing it.(_

Ty shot up the steps and stopped by the edge. "Okay, how did the lovers quarrel go?"

"Hell hath no fury like a seriously pissed off woman." I responded dryly.

"Bourne", Cecelia looked around, "Where's the rest of the squad?"

"They are behind me, I rushed forward to make sure that you two weren't being attacked again."

_)Great, now she'll be pissed at both of us for doing that. I should have known that just considering it was enough even if you didn't finish saying it.(_

She crossed her arms and looked at him for a moment. "I'll let it slide this once because they are in a large team and your concern is acceptable from what we faced out here."

_)...I...I don't...dude, second we're alone, I'm switching us back. I can't deal with this. I can handle Iron or Arnold, or even Udina and the Council. But this chick? No. Just no.(_

_ (Aww, that's so sweet of you to say about me. I knew you really cared.)_

_ )Fuck off.(_

_ *So, how many bones did she break?*_

_ )I healed them up. Mostly.(_

_ ^Hey, what's ugly, psychotic, and juvenile?^_

_ )Me, Iron, and baby Krogan.(_

_ ^No, a racoon. Why would you say you are? You are in my body, probably the best you have looked in a while.^_

_ (I thought the scars were an improvement.)_

_ )And while your face is in better shape, the veins and crap still make it pretty bad.(_

_ ^...I should have opened your mask and seen if I could get Layla to throw up.^_

_ (If she's seen you naked, I doubt anything would phase that lady.)_

_ ^Uh, she never did.^_

_ )...(_

_ *...*_

_ (...Wow. Even I feel genuinely sorry for you. That's a sign of how embarrassing that is.)_

_ )Yeah, have to agree. I mean, even if Hero had to do it with a lizard-(_

_ *Do not even go there.*_

_ ^Excuse me for holding to the fact that I was a Southern Baptist for twelve years and I was scared shitless that I would be going to hell over the slightest sexual act. You all have no room to judge me because you all have sex with someone after a few conversations.^_

_ )...simultaneous laugh on three?(_

_ *Sure.*_

_ (I can do that.)_

_ ^Hey, guess what I can do over this link. I have two songs that I can listen to all day but the question is, can you?^_

I cut the link and shut him off from my comm. "Can we please get back to killing Geth, or whatever? That'll be a walk in the park compared to-goddamnit, I walked right into that!"

A Geth juggernaut along with a few rocket troopers rounded the corner and began firing at us.

Hero almost sighed as she put one of her trademark domed barriers up. "I need to switch careers."

Cecelia rolled off me and into cover, and I tapped the glitch on the wall and came out behind the Geth. "Ditto."

Ty teleported right above the Geth juggernaut and landed on it's shoulders. "Are you kidding me? I would make this a career if I could!" With one quick yank he pulled it's head off and made it fall to the ground.

Code appeared around my hand, and I threw it at the nearest Geth. It shrunk and crawled towards me as a swarmer, which I crushed under foot. "Then you better make sure it comes with good mental health coverage."

Ty stood up from the juggernaut and grabbed the closest rocket trooper for cover. "No way, I want to do this till I'm as fucked up as fuckface."

"Yeah, an Asari could do this their whole life and not come close." I responded as I dodged a rocket and threw the glaive at the trooper that'd launched it.

There was a sudden moment where everything slowed as the glaive sliced through the Geth and a girl stepped out from where the Geth came from and was suddenly walking calmly through the middle of the carnage. She looked from person to person making sure to glare at Cecelia. She looked like she belonged on a farm rather than a battle field but she didn't mind.

Eventually, she got to me and looked right into my eyes for a second. From the look she gave me I knew who it was. She, on the other hand had no idea who I was.

With a wave of her hand time itself seemed to stop, except for her and me. "Why are you in my ex's body?"

"If I knew that, trust me, I'd be doing everything possible to get out of it." I said, trying to find a balance between accuracy, and not pissing her off.

She leaned in close to my face and forced my mask to open with her glare. "So, what did he tell you about me?"

"Nothing good."

"Hahaha, did he tell you how we met? How I picked him up from nothing? How I made his wildest dreams come true?"

I gave her a questioning look. "Meaning?"

"I'll start with how we met. He was face down in a bar looking like the most pathetic guy on the planet. My friends told me that I should go talk to him and get his hopes up. Then, when he was feeling good to dash him down and see if he could look more pathetic."

"There any particular reason for the history lesson? Because if you didn't notice, we're kinda in the middle of something here." I couldn't tell if the expressionless face unnerved her, but at the very least it might get her attention. And it was a sort of comfort to myself, which didn't hurt considering who I was talking to.

"Fine, I will be by later but do me a favor and ask him how we met. Do me a little justice that I haven't been served." She snapped her fingers and everything went back to normal.

The thrown glaive went right through the Geth I'd thrown it at, and I brought it back to my hand as I spun around, slicing the head off of a hunter I'd noticed while talking to Layla. _Guess she actually did me a favor there_. I noticed the faint outline of another hunter and raised my hand, deploying a snap freeze.

Ty, of course hadn't experienced the time stop like I had, so he replied to my comment like nothing had happened. "Who needs a thousand years when you have a head start like I do."

_*Could you maybe not say stuff like that while you're in his body?*_

_)Yeah, no kidding. I might like fighting, but not quite that much.(_

A blast from a shotgun dropped my shields, and I wheeled around to face the one who'd fired it, omni-blade deployed. I sliced through the gun on the first swing, then reversed it and sliced cleanly through a third hunter. "I think you're a liiiiittle different than fuckface."

_(Hey! Just cause he calls me that doesn't mean you need to!)_

_*Actually, yeah, I think it does.*_

_(Well, that medbay upgrade was expensive! What was I supposed to do, skip the bigger gun on the ship?)_

_^No, fuckface, you were supposed to go around the galaxy and get some resources to do it. Anyone, ever see TJ Lazer?^_ Ty smashed into the last Geth using a biotic charge and shouting, "Space boost!"

_*Yeah, that was fun at first, but after awhile it just got boring.*_

_)And never, ever say something like that while I'm fighting. Or you're...christ, that's it. After this, we're going to pretend Cecelia slamming me into a wall made it so I can't fight anymore, and you took a rocket on the way up here that's finally caught up to you, then we are going back to the Normandy so I can get us back into our right bodies. Or kill us both trying.(_

_ ^Or we could try the direct method.^_

_ )Whatever you're thinking of doing with my body- don't.(_

_ ^You lost the right to tell me what to do after you got my ass kicked by Cecelia and trust me, this is definitely going to be more painful for me than it is you.^_

_ *To be fair, he did at least heal the damage. And with this chick, he probably did you a favor and made her more into you.*_

Cecelia called everyone over into a group. "Okay, Ty, Bourne, and Hero-"

_*You know, I think I was honestly starting to prefer Hannah. Thanks for letting that slip.*_

"-You three will remain here and combat any Geth threats that might try to hit us on our way back. Wrex, Garrus and I will head down to talk to Fai Dan and see if he needs anything else before we move on."

There was a group nod and everyone took to their tasks. Ty grabbed Iron by the throat and smashed him into a wall just enough that he was stuck. "I do love biotic strength."

_)That isn't biotic strength genius. If it was, Hero would hit harder than she already does. Drew upgraded my body to just about Spartan-2 level strength.(_

"And Cecelia is out of earshot so why are you talking through the mind link?"

I crossed my arms. "Need it be said we thought the same about Tali when we were in the shooting range? Call me paranoid."

At the mention of Tali, Ty punched Iron in the stomach and dug him a little deeper into the wall. "That little bitch. I wish Shepard would have just left her dead."

"Don't be so hard on her." Iron said with a laugh. "She's really fun when you need to stab-" The rest of his words were cut off as I launched a submission net at him, the electricity causing him to lose control of his muscles.

"You know Iron, there was a time when I would have been slightly pissed at the thought of anyone else killing you. Now, I just want you dead. Like, encased in cement and fired into a sun dead."

Ty began spinning one of my knives between his fingers, something I occasionally did when bored, but more often to intimidate. "You know, Iron, if you want to see her stabbed then check out memory 4. She got skewered by swords about two feet in width."

The maniac whistled softly as the net finally wore off.. "How'd she survive that one?" I wasn't sure, but I suspected he knew the real outcome and was trying to piss him off.

With a flick of his wrist, Ty sent the knife into the air and made it land in on his arm, storing itself. "Shepard happened. Doesn't matter though, I'm here now and she isn't. Well, technically she is and she is a rumor spreading bitch but mine isn't here."

"As much as I'd love to let him continue to talk so we could beat the crap out of him some more-" Code glowed around my hand. "We should probably get on with this."

Hero looked thoughtful suddenly. "Wait. Maybe there's another way to switch you back."

I turned to look at her in surprise, but Iron just laughed. "Please, like this wannabe would be able to control it." A moment later, my eyes widened in understanding behind the visor.

"Too late", Ty yelled as he grabbed my hand and slammed it into his chest. All that happened was a faint thunk, and what felt like a broken knuckle.

"Oh c'mon, this trick took no focus at all." He moved my arm back and slammed it into his chest again. "You should start a merging process. Why aren't you starting a merging process?"

I sent an overload along my arm, which stunned him and made him let go. "Here's a thought- don't be a back seat User!" I shook my head. "And Iron- strange as it is- could be right. What if it's not Code warping that switched us?"

"What are you talking about? What else could it be?"

"The same thing that made me a Spectre, and kept me from having too great an impact." I said flatly. "What if something happened that made us bend reality?"

"It would make sense in a way." Hero said after a moment's consideration. "Hard to imagine a bigger change than Ty and the AIs. But giving those powers to someone with little idea how to use them…"

I grimaced. "Then it may well be that the only thing that'll happen is a quartet of sudden deaths."

"Or you could just all be paranoid and I made it up off the top of my head." Iron said in sing-song. "Can you take the risk?"

"Bourne, it's times like this that only one thing got me through. Improvisation, so just do what your gut tells you and lets get me back in my body."

I reached for him, then hesitated and pulled back, trying to figure out exactly what my gut said. Then I smiled and turned to Iron.

"I'm impressed. You almost had me fooled."

He sneered at me. "It's a very real possibility."

"Oh, I agree. But what you fooled me about was that chance that you'd actually know what you were talking about." I took a step closer. "How would you? You've never had that power at all."

He bristled at that. "I used it several times when it was the only way to keep us both from dying. Then when she popped along-"  
I cut across him. "You're just a delusional pathetic idiot who dreams of a power he can never have."

Despite the restraints and the chemicals flowing through his system, his eyes started glowing red. "You would mock a god?"  
I laughed.

"Uh, Jason, what the hell are you doing?" Hero broke in.

Ty charged over by her and clenched his fist. "Okay, now run forward and jump into Iron's chest. Then, once you are in his core start ripping lines out and see which one would make him change genders."

I ignored them both, saying whatever came to mind. "Iron. The most mismatched name I ever gave someone. You're not even worthy to be rust."

He tried to lunge, and actually managed to crack part of the rock. "I could warp reality such that you-"

"That I what, died?"

"Painfully."

"Like you would even if you could. It wouldn't even be my body you were destroying."

Something seemed to glow on the edge of my vision, though the others didn't notice if there was something.

He snarled wordlessly.

"Face it. You're a joke, a hasbeen, a loser." That last one made his eyes widen in outrage, and I knew he was near a breaking point. _And if this doesn't work, at least there's plan B._

"I am a god!"

I put my finger against his chest, and he looked like he would bite it off if he could bend his neck right. "Iron, right now, there's only one person here who's a god. And it isn't you."

His eyes glowed pure white, and something radiated out from him, sweeping Ty and I along with it, though nothing else seemed to be affected by it.

Iron started laughing maniacally. "You see? I am very much...a...god...you devious son of a bitch!"

I pushed myself to my feet, and met his glowing red eyes with my own blue eyes. I looked down at myself, and smiled as I saw the familiar grey pattern, along with a full supply of knives, and my Assassin on my thigh.

"You wanted me to do that!"

"And you fell for it hook, line, and sinker." I looked over at Ty, on his back and looking at the sky through a crack in the window. Unlike with me, technocyte armor still covered him- the version without my modifications. _Probably because he actually had it last time he was here. Or because it's his problem. No complaints from me either way._

"I can't feel my ribs. Why do I see spots? Uh, activate healing program."

Hero shook her head. "I can't decide if that was extremely clever, or the dumbest thing you've ever done."

"I think it'd have to be second if it were the latter. Hard to top the time I let Cecelia shock me over a sniper rifle."

Iron was seething silently, glaring. I just smiled mockingly, feeling the slight tugging from my facial scars. "Next time Iron, just give up sooner."

I looked back at the User as he stood up clutching his ribs. "Does… anyone else feel like the world is shaking up and down?"

"That could mean one of two things. Either Iron warped reality so hard the needle between Code and Reality finally swung in my favor...or Cecelia swung me into shit harder than I thought and I just can shrug that off more than you can."

Ty stumbled over to a rock and leaned on it. "Did you copy and paste previous stats?"

"Uh...Maybe? Is that bad?"

Ty opened his visor and puked so hard it landed on Hero's boots. "No, unless you were looking for a long term fix rather than a two minute relief. God, you idiot, why did you think it would be that easy?"

"Why do you think I wanted to give those things back to you? You're the one that can actually put them to use." I snapped my fingers and genuinely smiled as biotics flared along my arm. "Also, I've completely spoiled myself with these things. Do you know how annoying it is to suddenly have to walk over to stuff to pick it up instead of just letting it fly over to you?"

"Glad to see you've got your priorities straight." Hero muttered under her breath. I smiled more broadly, knowing I'd have never heard it in Ty's body.

Ty stood up and wiped the chunks off his mouth. "You're right, I am the better user and that's why-" He took two steps before jumping to Iron and merging into his body.

Iron's neck craned and he began convulsing and as he did, one of his eyes began to glow green and the red zero appeared on his chest. There was a slight pause and then both his eyes lit up. "I am going to do what I have been wanting to do for a while now."

"Tell me he didn't just merge with a complete maniac? Again?" Hero and I said simultaneously. "And stop doing that!"

Iron got out of the wall and immediately met his own hand to his face over and over again. "Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself. Haha, fuckface, you and I are about to have some fun."

Hero looked pointedly at me. I shrugged. "He said listen to my gut. We never said my gut was very smart."

Iron spun around and placed both hands on the wall. _^Well, look at this, a nice wall for you to bash your head into. Oh, and looks like I accidentally deleted Saren's invincibility mod.^_

My Assassin was in my hand instantly. _)Then get out of there so I can blow his head off.(_

_ (What happened to not caring-)_

_ )I changed my mind. Must mean my regular personality is completely back.(_

_ *When did it ever leave?*_

Iron's head began colliding with the wall over and over again. _^So, does this mean the slight sense of humor that you managed to acquire in my body is gone now?^_

_ )Jump out of there and we'll see if I crack a joke after putting a few in his head.(_

_ *Technically, that is a sense of humor. It's just really dark, dreary, and sarcastic.*_

_ ^Seriously man, if you ever get out of here, you need to come to Idaho. We can go cow tipping and light fireworks off in the river and we can even stuff a potato in the tailpipe of an old car to see how long it takes for it to explode.^_

_ )I suppose I am in a bit of a bad mood. Let's see if killing him changes that.(_

_ (And I thought I had a one track mind.)_

_ )You wish you had a full track.(_

_ ^Okay, it will take me a minute or two to get out of here. Or someone can touch him on the shoulder and I can just transfer into their head.^_

_ *I'm good.*_

_ )Ditto.(_

_ (Don't I get a say in this?)_

_ ^Sure, say fuckface.^ T_y shot out of his back but as he did Iron began screaming at the top of his lungs.

"I'm fuckface! I'm fuckface!"

I raised the gun and pointed it as his head. "After this hits you, you'll be no face." I pulled the trigger, but he collapsed at just the right split second so the shot missed.

I grimaced and aimed at him again. "Probably just as well. Not my best line. How's about- stay dead this time."

"You're right, that is much better." The restraint on his wrist suddenly snapped open, and his Nova hit me point blank, throwing us all back.

He stood up, rolling his shoulders. "What do you know? Looks like normal not only means you being in the right bodies, but me having my powers." He looked at the restraint in distaste and brought his foot down on it, crushing it with a loud crunch. "So much for that plan. Hope you have a better one." He raised his hands, glowing red. "Cause for me, my plan is simple. Kill the three of you, and then everyone else!"

**^Bourne, just so you know. You're next.^**

**(What? No, I'd kill him before I killed you.)**

**^I meant after I was done pulling out your entrails and shoving them up your ass.^**

**(...Yeah, let's look at this from a story perspective for a sec. Why do you think you'd be able to kill me off the first time I showed up again?)**

**)Isn't that what happened last time? You reappeared then got a mountain dropped on you?(**

**(...So why does he want to do that to you?)**

**)How would I know? I can't read minds.(**

**^Well, let's see. You blasted Cecelia, so basically all the fans up to this point just let out an angered roar because everything that we were building up to was kinda thrown down the drain, you are a terrible me, and bone town… just the sheer stupidity of that.^**

**)If you're killing or at least torturing Iron in the process, totally worth it...also, you haven't been doing the best impression of me either. I mean, what was that crap with the 'I want to do this till I'm as fucked up as fuckface' thing? Didn't exactly improve social standing like you claimed was your goal. Not to mention that you were trying to be _Iron's_** **friend.(**

**(You're just jealous cause nobody wants to be your friend.)**

**^Yeah, at least he's fun and can have a good time. I'm surprised you haven't donned a cape and cowl and called yourself Batman.^**

**)Good ti- the only way he can have a good time is stabbing people or wearing their intestines as ties!(**

**(Don't forget wearing their skulls as party hats. With the eyeballs still in, that's an important bit.)**

**)You see what I mean?(**

**^Yeah, what do you find fun besides getting your weapons ready to hurt people and hurting people?^**

**)That isn't all I do- it's just all that was really shown because it was a combat focused story. That and poker.(**

**^Well, then, what do you do?^**

**(Your mom.)**

**)I thought we already established that A: Girlfriend, and B: I have standards.(**

**^Haha, so sex, violence and poker are your hobbies.^**

**)Those aren't my only hobbies! T117 just sucks at working anything else into the story.(**

**^Okay, then what are your hobbies?^**

**T117: I also suck at coming up with them, apparently. Cause I'm kinda a nerd, but I'm downplaying that for Bourne. Also, it just doesn't seem realistic for him to be interested in movies or video games so much when everyday life comes with a serious adrenaline rush, and he wouldn't exactly re-read something he's memorized perfectly.**

**S7: He's got excellent motor control and with the biotics he could take up wood carving.**

**T117:...Yeah, I doubt I'd go with that. I actually have a scar on my right index finger from when I sliced it open carving something; my scout troop immediately had a new 'no non-locking blades' policy.**

**S7: Speaking of hobbies and getting recognized. Someone knew who I was at Comicon. Got talking about fan fiction with a guy and he asked me if I wrote any. Told him Users and Users in a World of Fiction. He was like "Wait, Starspike7?"**

**T117:...There's like what, 500, maybe 600 people that read this thing? The odds of that happening are like...a billion to one! **

**)Please don't try to make up numbers like that. It just encourages Spike and Co. to actually do the math and prove you wrong.(**

**T117: I'm just saying...That's pretty damn cool though.**

**(Statistically, something about him has to be.)**

**S7: He began looking around asking where Trebor was thinking that we were friends in real life.**

**T117:...Yeah, we don't even live in the same state.**

**(Also, what do you mean friends in _real _life? That'd imply that you're friends in fake life.)**

**T117: We're friends on Xbox Live so I think that counts as a yes.**

**(...So you accepted _his _friend request but not mine?)**

**S7: Sorry but let's face it. You have no friends.**

**(Not for a lack of trying on Ty's part. For whatever dumbass reason.)**

**^Oh you can suck it, metal head.^**

**(Oh, I'm going to need ice for that burn. *sarcasm.)**

**~Honestly, you should just plain stop. You haven't been funny since three chapters ago.~**

***Which one are you talking to?***

**)Okay, that one might actually need ice.(**

**~Both, ever since Bourne and he switched bodies, they have just been , well people can only take a psychopath for so long.~**

**(Really? Cause it's been...like 70 some odd chapters, and people don't seem too disappointed that I'm still around...not to mention, the Joker first was created in 1940, and still is the best/most iconic Batman Villain.)**

***Yeah, and I hate to give Iron credit, but he technically is the reason Bourne and Ty are back in their own bodies now...okay, maybe call him half the reason.***

**^Doesn't mean we would prefer to deal with him.^**

**(What happened to wanting to be all buddy buddy and prank 'Hannah' together?)**

**^Okay, I think we have established that what is happening in the story has nothing to do with what is going on here already.^**

**S7: That is true.**

**T117: Eh, I'll back that up.**

**(Oh sure, take their side instead of mine.)**

**^He chose the side of sanity.^**

**(LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME!)**

**~I like how you finally came to grips with how people think of you, Iron.~**

**(...Okay, let's be honest. If we had a poll for the fan's favorite character I'd be their favorite _at least_ from SiaWoF if not from UiaWof too.)**

**T117: Yeah, I gotta be honest- Iron usually gets the most laughs out of me.**

**(See? He agrees with me.)**

**)Gee, wonder why he might agree with something you'd say. Lord knows he never agrees with me or Hero.(**

**S7: How about we do a poll? Ty, Bourne, Hero, Iron, Layla, and Cecelia?**

**T117: You know...yeah, why not. I actually want to see how this turns out. Though I have no idea what the results are actually going to be.**

**(I'm just saying- a lot of the audience is here from SiaWoF, so…)**

**)So, there were as many reviews telling him to get rid of you as there were saying you were funny.(**

So you do not want to enter my name in the contest?

**T117: Oh, that reminds me. One of the reviewers suggested CTHI as a name- Collaborative Typing Host Interface, pronounced like "Kathy"- and Spike and I both agree that's way better than what we came up with. **

That _is _better.

**S7: Sweet, now are we going to the Sexy Librarian image or the Warmaiden look for her?**

**T117: ...What.**

**S7: The image that pops up every time she talks.**

**(...Only you would come up with an avatar deal for what's literally a chick just meant to be text.)**

**^Lets see Cortana, EDI, Serena we have ten other hot computer women in the world that demand us to give her a sexy form.^.* (...) )...So, I know you 't log T117 or Spike out, but could you log Ty out?(**

Are you saying you do not think I deserve to look feminine?

**T117: I think they're more saying I didn't have a...look, in mind for you. I really just went with the SIRI voice thing since...yeah, this thing is mostly males.**

**S7: Alright reviews decide on this. See you next time, don't forget to vote on Trebors profile. Cecelia or Ty for the win.**

**T117: I gotta put my vote for Iron.**

**)Seriously?( *Oh come on!***

I've only existed for a few chapters- are you even going to bother to put my name in the poll?

**T117: Eh...yeah, might as well.**

**S7: Alright, time to go drive the batmobile. 1473I2.**

**T117:...Are you sure you can't ever log him out?**

Positive.

**T117: Can't blame a guy for trying. Sayonara.**


	29. The User's Girl

**Cecelia:**

Shepard led the way down the stairs, though half the reason was that she didn't want the others to see her face. Thinking about Ty had gotten it a little red, and she wasn't fully sure what the reason behind that was.

"Shepard, with all due respect, are you sure it's wise to leave the three of them alone?" Garrus asked suddenly. "Or I guess it'd be four of them with 'Iron.'"

She gave Garrus a look of wonder and anger. "Something wrong, Garrus?"

His mandibles twitched slightly. "Well, you heard what Bourne was saying. Something about him just...rubs me the wrong way, as you humans might say. And Iron even more so."

"Ty's with them, he should be able to handle it with Hero's help."

"She doesn't seem particularly stable right now either. The first thing she did when she saw Iron was try to kill him- even put Bourne in stasis to try. And he blasted you out of his way trying to kill him. Just feels like a timebomb to have them all together."

Wrex grunted in what was obviously agreement. "Bourne still says it was Ty that made him punch me across the cargo bay."

"And when Ty got back, he kept going on about how he and Bourne had switched bodies." Garrus added after a moment.

She couldn't deny what they were saying and it meant she was letting her emotions get in the way. "You're right, I'm going back. You two go talk to Fai Dan."

There was suddenly a loud explosion from the top of the tower. "On second thought, we're all going."

They rushed back up the stairs, though Shepard overtook the other two by a few feet. As she reached the top, she took the situation in at a glance. Bourne, Ty and Hero were on the ground not far from Iron, who was glowing with biotics that for some reason were red. "Cause for me, my plan is simple. Kill the three of you, and then everyone else!"

Shepard swung her sniper rifle over her shoulder and fired in one swift movement. It bounced off his barrier, and he turned to look at her, a smile on his face far scarier than she had ever even come close to. "Ah, even better. I can kill the six of you and then everyone else."  
He suddenly flew backwards into the wall. "Over. My. Dead. Body." Bourne said, getting back to his feet. Shepard noticed detachedly that the tecnocide or whatever it was called no longer covered him, his old armor having taken its place.

"Oh, good, I was worried you hadn't heard me." Iron said as he got back up, not even dazed. " I hate repeating myself." He glowed red, and slammed forward into Bourne, knocking him into a wall.

A purple field suddenly surrounded him. "Jason! Hit him back!" Hero shouted from the ground, leg bent at an unnatural angle.

Bourne seemed more than happy to comply, and there was a small explosion as Iron flew backwards. "Ty, now would be an excellent time to start improvising." He said, voice somehow calm.

Cecelia looked around but Ty was nowhere to be seen , he had just vanished. "Did he just run?" She asked herself aloud.

Ty suddenly shot out of a hole in the wall and grabbed Iron's ankle and pulled it out from under him causing him to land on his ass. "Nope, I'm just using the glitches." Then, he shot back into the 'glitch' and was gone again.

"Yeah, when I said improvise, I really meant rip him apart into his smallest bits." Bourne commented, spreading his arms like a scarecrow. He and Hero were both suddenly surrounded by a giant blue sphere. "Come on Iron, let's finish this, cage match style."

He just laughed. "You think an N7 wouldn't recognize a warp sphere? I'm a maniac, not a moron."

"I fail to see the distinction in your case."

He waved a crimson finger. "You already got me to lose my temper once. I'm not making that mistake again."

Shepard shot him in the back, and though his barrier and armor kept it from penetrating, it knocked flat on his face. "Do you mind? We're trying to have a death match here."

A knife suddenly flew through his hand, pinning him to the ground. "No offense Shepard, but I think this is a little out of your league." Bourne said as he threw a second knife into the other hand and pulled his pistol from his side.

There was a flash behind Iron and his eyes lit up green. "Don't shoot!"

What came out of Bourne's throat was nearly a growl. "Ty, Will you stop fucking around and either kill him, or let someone else do it? Preferably me?" He aimed the gun square at his head. "Because let me be honest- after the day I've had so far, I already really want to pull this trigger.. .And having you in there doesn't make it easier to keep myself from pulling it."

"Oh, fuck you Bourne, I just stopped you from getting killed. Iron was going to use one of your knives to slit your own throat. He still has it biotically grabbed. Look at your shoulder." Shepard looked between them in confusion, both because the knife indeed was glowing red, and because Iron was now speaking with Ty's voice.

"In that case, would you kindly rip him to shreds? Or do something besides hopping into his body? Or better yet- take away his biotics but leave him alive so I can take my time killing him."

There was a flash in Iron's back and Ty stepped out while Iron crumpled further to the floor. "I took away his biotics and motor control."

"In that case-" both knives flew out of Iron's hands as Bourne lifted him into the air. "Shepard, I may need to sit the rest of this mission-"

Iron's head suddenly exploded, and he glared at Shepard. "Really? Fucking Really? You know how long I've been waiting to kill him? And then you put him down with a single headshot?! That's just-"

He and Ty were suddenly thrown back by a flash of white energy, and when Shepard could see again, Iron's head was back in one piece as he stood up. "Huh. So being shot in the head is less painful than getting spaced. Who'da thought?"

Bourne looked up at him, and his face turned to irritation. "How many times is it going to take before you finally just stay dead?"  
He shrugged. "Last time around, I hadn't died yet. Maybe two-face isn't the only one who can't die until a certain point...by the way, he's really pissed about that, even though you haven't done it here. Even to me, that doesn't make sense."

Ty stood up and looked at Iron. "Two-face? Why are you calling Saren two face?"

Iron looked at him like he was an idiot. "Last time they met, Bourne's Shepard shot off one of his mandibles." He stopped, and raised his hands to his lips. "Wait a minute-" They spread into a huge and insane smile. "If I can say that without anything stopping me- maybe a few more of your lies need to be revealed."

Before even Bourne could react Ty shot forward and punched him with a golden aura surrounding his fist. Iron vibrated a bit and then dispersed into particles. Slowly, Ty turned around and rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry, I was getting tired of his crazy talk."

"If he's actually dead this time, I can put up with that." Bourne said, sliding his gun back onto his thigh. "Good riddance." He spat on the ground.

Ty shook his head. "Nope, just dispersed him and sent him to his respawn point."

He clenched his fists for a moment, before dropping the sphere around him and kneeling by Hero. "How bad is the leg?"

She grimaced as she pushed her chest up. "Pretty sure a few muscles got torn too- and the kneecap is completely shattered."

Bourne looked over at Ty. "Too much for the program?"

Ty shook his head again. "Are you kidding, this is what it was made for. But I would have to carry her for a while."

Hero's grimace was identical to Cecelia's.

"Uh, sorry to interrupt, but what the hell just happened?" Garrus broke in. "How'd Iron get free, and what happened to your armor Bourne?"

"Garrus, you have to be my favorite Turian of all time but you need to shut up." Ty walked past everyone and picked Hero up like he did when she was knocked out.

The Turian opened his mouth anyway, but was suddenly wrapped in a blue field of energy.

"He's not going to be much good in a fight while he's carrying her." Bourne commented, one eye on the stasis field. "And Iron got in a few good hits on me, so I'm not at 100 percent myself." Cecelia noticed his hand shaking slightly.

Ty looked down at Hero. "How's it working?"

"I can't exactly see through the armor."

Bourne stepped past them. "I think we ought to have Chakwas check it out- probably get the armor off too."

"I think we should keep the armor on her and just drop her off with Chakwas, Bourne. God, what you won't do to see a woman in her underwear." Ty laughed at his own joke and began walking down the stairs carrying Hero.

"Armor can be modified so we can wear normal stuff under it. You know that, right?" Bourne commented as he followed them.

"Didn't stop Cecelia from going commando."

Cecelia felt the blood rush to her cheeks and her fist clenched. "You are so lucky I am going to let that one slide Ty." She called after them.

"She already slammed you into a wall once today. Please don't push your luck." Hero commented just loud enough to be heard before they were out of earshot.

Cecelia turned back to the others. "Okay, we are going to look around here and see what we can dig up until Ty and Bourne get back." She made sure that her comm was on. "Because they better get back as fast as possible."

"Yeah yeah, if we're not, you'll kick our asses, etcetera etcetera, we get the gist of it." Bourne's voice came back. "We'll drop her off and get back here. Unless she can be ready to go before too long, in which case we're waiting for her-" The line suddenly went dead.

"Oh, he did not just hang up on me."

"No, I tripped him. He's laying face down at the bottom of the stairs." Ty was laughing over the comm and it just made Cecelia cover her eyes with her hand.

"You know Ty, sometimes I wonder…"

"How a girl like you could catch the eye of a guy like me?"

"How you are still alive?"

Bourne's voice came back over the com. "Finally someone wonders that about someone other than me. And Ty, if you weren't carrying one of my friends and already beat to shit, just know that I'd be decking you for that. Probably not with biotics, but still decking you."

"You got me punched enough today."

"...yeah, there's that too."

**Tali:**

Tali wiped some of the grease that fell on her mask off as she worked under Joker's console. "That work yet?"

There was a zap sound. "Ah, damn, the console just went transparent but this time it just shocked me."

"Sorry, let me try tightening the bolts on the graphic stabilizer." Her hands moved and her omni-tool began the process on the stabilizer. "How about now?"

"Damn, it just got really bright and", there was the sound of buttons being pressed, "It's working fine. Thanks Tali."

She pushed herself out from under the console and stood up right as the airlock doors opened. "Who's here?"

Her question was answered as Ty stepped onto the Normandy carrying Hero. "I'm telling you, the Earth should have switched to giant robots after they found out that Aliens existed. Imagine the surprise on the Turian's faces when the Gipsy Danger comes up to their base and bitch smacks them off the colony."

"And I still say if they'd had some sort of real super soldier program like the Spartan-2s, it'd have been just as effective with half the cost. Imagine a few hundred of me running around." Bourne replied as he stepped through after.

"That is a terrifying thought." Hannah commented.

"I'm going to choose to take that as a compliment."

Ty adjusted her a bit as he turned to go down stairs. "Look, we really need to get you some code based surgery. Something that gets the heavy metal out of your system."

"Yeah, but you two don't have time to-" Bourne cut her off.

"Hero, today I've been pushed out of elevator, slammed into a crate, slammed into a wall, didn't even get to shoot Iron, and then on top of that, I somehow let myself get pulled into a discussion about giant robots. I hardly think pissing Cecelia off is going to be as bad. And, you're my friend, so if she does get pissed about it, that's her problem."

Ty fell down to one knee. "Ouch, my ribs."

"Which is why I'm going to head back while Ty stays here to fix your leg, and take any fire myself so he doesn't have to do a repeat."

"And the hand shaking and 'not being at 100%'?"

He shrugged. "Mostly lying. I was just trying not to punch a wall out of frustration."

Ty began to stand up again. "I don't have to do it. But I'm not taking you dancing if you don't let me do it at some point."

"I wasn't planning on stopping you." Hero said, wincing slightly as her leg shifted in his arms. "But I can handle it like this for few hours. Not as bad as some injuries I've had."

"I kinda doubt that." Bourne commented.

"I got sucked out of a spaceship!"

"...point taken."

Once he was up, Ty continued walking forward. "So, ever done the tango Hero?"

She gave him a flat look. "You do remember that Cecelia..."

"Pounded him into the ground hard enough to break several ribs." Bourne finished for her. "And will likely do it again if she thinks you're hitting on someone else."

"Are you kidding? I'm not hers, I can dance with whoever I want. Plus, the looks on Hero's face were priceless. You looked like you were having fun, Hero."

"...if you weren't carrying me, I think I would slap you for saying that."

"Yeah, I know you're a little of out of practice with dating dude, but seems like it should be obvious."

Ty's eyebrow rose and he looked offended. "So, I'm not fun to dance with and you didn't like it?"

"Not what I said." She said, crossing her arms.

"Also, are you working on something and we're distracting you, or are you listening in again?" Bourne asked, turning his head just far enough to look at Tali.

"So, what are you saying then?" Ty seemed to not pay attention to Bourne and focus on what Hero meant.

"Ever heard the term monogamy?"

Bourne whistled softly. "Damn, right for the throat."

"Monogamy? What the fuck does that have to do with where I am right now?"

"Generally, when you've got feelings for someone that returns them, that's called trying to start a relationship. So dancing with someone else isn't exactly the-"

Bourne cut her off. "I hate to play devil's advocate here, but dancing with a friend isn't quite the same thing as...other activities that could take place. Such as in an elevator." That last bit was added with a distinct smirk.

"Flirting isn't the same as saying I love you Bourne. And Hero, I can't dance with other people because I have mutual feelings with someone else by your logic? Well, from what I experienced at the bonfires from where I'm from, you are wrong."

"Dude, you hit her with tech armor and she didn't murder you for it." Bourne pointed out, seeming especially amused. It certainly got Tali's attention, and she casually started walking behind them.

Bourne turned his head to look back at her, but aside from a warning look, he made no effort to discourage her. "She almost did, I still can't feel my toes. So, in Bourne's world, that means that I should totally go for this girl. Bourne, I think you are a masochist."

"Still better than the last girl you dated." Bourne seemed to be looking around the room as he said that, almost as if he expected her to be here. "And..., let me put it this way. If I really thought it was that terrible of an idea, do you honestly think that I would be encouraging it?"

Ty turned away from him. "You know, Layla wasn't bad at all before we came into the game."

A blue wall of energy suddenly appeared in front of Tali, and she had to stop so she didn't walk into it. But he hadn't quite made it wide enough, so she slipped around it a moment later.

"And Cecelia doesn't seem so bad when she's not being super gung ho or trying to rip someone's face off."

There was a moment of silence as Ty thought about it. "Yeah, only problem is that you kind of screwed it up so that she relates both to me now."

"If you trace it back far enough, situation still is your fault. I wasn't the one who...got the technocytes on us, which is what caused the later scenario." Tali knew he was editing because she was there.

Ty turned to him and Tali saw that he was struggling with Hannah. "No, you got it because I had to give you my blood. You lost that blood because you were an idiot in the bar."

"You mean the bar it was your idea to go to to? In the fight you started by smashing a bottle into a guy's head?"

"I assumed the the super soldier knew how to fight but I guess I was wrong."

"Typically, I fight in armor with shields and a few dozen knives at hand. And that blood could have come from anyone, you just happened to be there and...Dr. Michel wanted to talk to both of us about what happened." He put emphasis on that part. "If Hannah hadn't been pissed at you, it could just as easily have been her blood."

"Jason, do not tell me you seriously are trying to put the blame on me." She said icily.

Ty smiled and took off down the stairs. "Shit, I think we know that it is his fault now."

Bourne didn't follow them, instead stopping and glaring at them. "You know, considering what happened last time, I'd have thought you'd have learned not to eavesdrop." It was said in an undertone, but Tali knew it was meant for her.

Tali looked away and began walking back to Joker. "Sorry, force of habit."

"Might be a good one to try breaking." He replied as he followed the others, voice raised again. "It's my fault she beat the crap out of you, but you're the reason I ended up in a position where I caused that reaction. That sound fair?"

"No way Bourne, you are the root of all our problems!"

The closing door cut off the rest of the conversation.

**Ty:**

I laid Hero on the table carefully and turned to Chakwas. "We need you to fix Hannah up while we get back into the field."

Bourne's voice came from directly behind me. "And you expect her to know how to handle extremely advanced and unique cybernetics like that?...no offense doctor."

"None taken Bourne, but I think that I can handle a fractured knee. Plus, she has no cybernetics in her leg."

_)Uh...didn't the Lazarus project have to basically rebuild everything? Including both legs?...or did you do something to get them out of the way for her?(_

I took my hands away from Hero and the repair program faded. _^I think that the repair program returns your stats to when they were at their peak.^_

_ *My biotics were at least twice as powerful the second time around. Along with everything else.*_

_ )More important question- could you put her back after the leg's healed?(_

_ ^Oh, yes master. I can do that. After all, I am here to satisfy your every need and desire because that's just how I fucking roll.^_

_ )It was just a fucking question! You don't have to be so damn defensive because someone asks you a question!(_

I rubbed the back of my head and looked away from him. _^Sorry, I'm used to you demanding me to do things instead of asking. Yeah, um, I don't know about the cybernetics. It might take some doing but I think I might be able to.^_

_ *Good. Because with Iron out there, we could use any advantage we can.*_

_ )Also, what was it you did to him, exactly?(_

_ *I could ask you the same question.*_

_ ^That's what I meant I would do by ripping someone apart by their smallest code. It rips them apart and reforms them at their spawn point in their original state with all their enhancements taken away. He might have reformed on Eden Prime and hopefully without his invincibility.^_

_ *...you know, the way you said that before, it sounded like you were just disintegrating the person.*_

_ )Could be. Omega seems more likely though, since that's where Saren first brought him out of his universe and into...Raptor's, I guess.(_

_ ^So, funny thought. You know how Garrus retained his feelings from the other universe?^_

That actually got Bourne to smile slightly. _)Not all of them. If he'd gotten them all, he'd be a lot more than just distrusting of me. But go on.(_

_ ^What if it has the reverse effect as well? Say, Ashley has the same feelings for Bourne that she does in his universe and here in mine.^_

_ )... Huh?(_

_ ^Say, Cecelia actually does have strong feelings for me. Then, god forbid this by the way, I go into your universe and Raptor automatically likes me as a friend.^_

_ )She barely puts up with _my _crap. She'd end up putting a bullet in your head inside an hour.(_

_ *Why would you end up in that universe anyway?*_

_ ^Well, if I give up my emotions and become a digital entity then I might drop in to say hi.^_

_ )I'll be honest dude. Both parts of that statement scare the crap out of me.(_

_ *Yeah, and it shows on your face too.* _ Hero said sarcastically, and he turned to give her an irritated look before returning his face to normal.

_ ^Why does it scare you? Lets face it, I will be bored out of my mind floating through the universe with digital control of everything. Might as well drop in and have some fun.^_

_ *Like Layla did with Iron?*_

_ )You noticed that? Weird, you guys all looked frozen to me.(_

His statement caught me off guard._ ^Huh, we met her out in front of the Normandy. What are you talking about?^_

_ )She basically stopped time- or maybe paused the game would be a better term- and asked, quote: "Why are you in my ex's body?" I said if I knew how to undo it, I would, she asked me what you'd told me about her, I said not a lot that was good, she started telling me how you two met, and then I cut her off and told her I was busy.(_

The last part made me jump._ ^What did she tell you?^_

_ )"He was face down in a bar, looking like the most pathetic guy in existence. My friends told me I should go talk to him and get his hopes up. Then, when he was feeling good, to dash him down and see if he could look even more pathetic."(_

_ *Seriously creepy Jason.*_

_ )I didn't want to paraphrase and leave something out.(_

I fell to the ground and laidthere_. ^Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.^_

_ *Hey, I met my boyfriend in the middle of him killing someone.*_

_ )And Ashley's first words to me were "who the hell are you?".(_

I stared at the ceiling. _^I just don't like to think about how I met her now.^_

"Is he alright?" Chakwas asked.

"Cecelia kinda beat the shit out of him because he...because I pissed her off and used him as the scapegoat." Bourne said. "Probably should check on that."

I began to remember and forgot the link was working.

She walked up to me in the bar and I had just finished my third bottle of Coors. My last girl left me waiting for her for five hours outside her house to see if I was committed enough. When I left at five she called me up and broke it off.

"So, can you look anymore pathetic than you do now?"

I raised my head up and looked at the girl at the front of my table. She wasn't much different from your average bar goer. Low cut shirt, jeans, and a pair of glasses hanging from her collar.

"I could if you don't join me for a little bit."

She raised an eyebrow. "You inviting me to sit with you?"

"I sure as hell ain't telling you to turn tail and run."

Grabbing a chair she sat across from me. "Something wrong or is the world just so bleak that you feel like there is no hope?"

I downed my fourth bottle and sat it on the table. "I had the best night ever actually."

"Oh?"

I put on my stupid smile. "I just got out of a relationship with a crazy girl."

She motioned to the waiter and held up two fingers. "Hm, never had a crazy guy to dump me yet."

"Well, I think I have gone half insane. How bout you give me your number and we'll see if you get a new experience?"

She looked back at her friends and bit her lip as if trying to make a decision.

"If you are going to start putting me down, I doubt you can. I'm the kind of person that bounces back and hangs in the air."

"How did you know?"

I pointed over at her friend in the middle and made eye contact with her. "Because, your friend over there is in my History class. She talks about doing this all the time. Probably thought I wasn't paying attention to her. Too bad she is too loud to ignore."

"Uh, I, um, there is a… two-oh-eight-seven-five-zero-three-four-seven-eight."

My head snapped up quick. "What?"

"That was my number. Do I have to repeat it?"

I caught the waiter coming and smacked the bottom of his trey to send the bottles into the air. With a quick hand motion, I snatched them as they fell and handed her her's. "Nope. You gonna stick around?"

"Did you just-"

"Catching them was completely by accident. Now are you going to stick around?"

The memory ended there and I opened my eyes while I pushed myself up off the ground."What are we standing around for? Lets go."

_*You do know that we 'saw' all of that, right?*_

_ )He's got a point though. I'd rather worry about the chick currently waiting for him. Because as we can both testify to- she can go to town when someone pisses her off.(_

_ ^Hero, do I look like I care? Bourne, then lets go!^_ I turned to the door and began talking towards the door.

_ )You think the teleportation power stuck around when we got switched back? Because something feels different with my biotics.(_

_ ^Possibly, now Hero, what comments do you want to make about the memory? Make fun of me all you want.^_

_ *I wasn't going to. I just didn't know if you meant to show it to us or not.*_

_ ^Does it matter now? You have seen it.^_

_ )Were you this much of a downer before we switched bodies? Or am I just noticing it more since you're not just trying to act like me?(_

I shook my head and caught myself. _^No, no I wasn't. Now, I'm back in my own body so it's time for some fun.^ _I grabbed the nearest glitch and forced it open. "Get in Bourne, time to ride the roller coaster."

"Yeah, I'd rather not risk trying to teleport unless I need to." He replied. "Because while I apparently still understand advanced eezo science, I also have no idea how to actually do it." He shrugged with a slight smile. "Maybe you are better at this stuff than me."

"Yes, I am the better biotic. Now get in the hole and pray to god that we don't come out in the middle of a fight."

"I thought you said glitches only work between parts of the same structure?"

"It was a joke, I am taking us to the airlock. Should we grab Tali?"

He thought for a moment. "I guess we may as well, since Hero's out of action for a while. Also, you seriously can't just walk up the stairs and to the airlock? You have to portal there?"

I rolled my eyes. "Bourne, it's like I just got my dodge Charger back. I'm going to want to use it's features again as soon as possible."

"Except that I crashed it into a metaphorical tree…or maybe a more literal one, considering who we're talking about."

I grabbed Bourne by the shoulder and yanked him into the portal and we came out right behind Joker. With one quick motion I tapped him on the shoulder and got his attention. "Yo, call Tali up here, will ya?"

I saw motion out of the corner of my eye as she stood up from underneath the controls. She looked slightly hesitant as she spoke. "What do you need?"

"We need you to come with us to Shepard. Hero and Liara are out of action for a little bit."

She seemed to relax slightly. "Sure. Just give me a minute to finish up here and grab my gear."

"You have forty-five seconds", I said jokingly.

Bourne smacked me in the back of the head. "Or you could just portal down there and grab it for her like a gentleman."

I opened and closed my hand and shrugged. "Sorry Bourne, looks like my powers aren't working for the next couple minutes."

"Are they actually not working, or are you trying to make a joke?"

"Column B all the way. Now go Tali, fly!"

Tali took off running for the elevator and was out of sight in the blink of an eye.

"I think that was a bit much." Bourne said, crossing his arms. "She could have heard a lot worse."

I sat on the ground while we waited and leaned against the wall. "She knows what she has to do to make it up to me."

"Should I even ask what that is?" He asked, leaning against the other wall. "At least this time you can't tell Arnold to shut me down just because I hit a nerve."

I clapped my hands together and felt a slight zap. "Not gonna tell you. It's private."'

"Fair enough." he said after a moment. "Do kinda feel bad about that now though. Might have been annoying, but didn't expect Arnold to get blasted off of me like that."

_If it comforts him, Arnold felt immense pain before final disintegration._

"I don't think he will feel good about that Drew."

"Feel good about what?"

"Nothing."

He gave me a skeptical look, before shrugging and letting his face go back to normal. "If you say so. Anyway, think we'll have any more surprises today?"

"We haven't seen Saren or the giant space loogy with a vagina for a mouth."

That one made Joker turn around in his seat.

_)Maybe it'd be a good idea to keep this a little more private if we're going to talk about things like that?(_

_ ^I think he turned more at the word vagina than the word Saren.^_

_ )...I think it was the entire phrase. "Giant space loogy with a vagina for a mouth?" That'd be hard to play off if Cecelia or Garrus heard it.(_

_ ^Have you ever noticed how it looks like it has a vagina for a mouth or is it just me?^_

_ )...I wasn't exactly looking at the time. I was more just focusing on how to kill it, and worrying about the possibility Shiala would see something she wasn't supposed to and force me to kill her...yeah, I wouldn't bet on your girlfriend letting her live after this.( _

_ ^Think back to your past playthroughs, did you ever think that when the camera circled around the monster?^_

_ )Why is that immediately where your brain went to?(_

_ ^Answer the question.^_

_ )Well, yeah, now that you pointed it out and made it impossible to unsee it.(_

I cracked my neck._ ^So, anything you want to ask?^_

He shrugged. _)Which do you think are more fun to use, biotics or tech?(_

_ ^My powers.^ _I looked at him and smiled as I thought it.

_)Wasn't the question. Though honestly, I think they suck compared to either.( _He held his hands up to stop my reply. _)I don't mean in terms of effectiveness, but they were a pain in the ass to do anything with.(_

I put my hand to the floor and made the airlock door behind him open by using the connection between the floor and walls. _^They aren't a pain, you just suck at using powers. Letting everything be muscle memory rebukes a ton of mine and your powers. You need to use focus on the powers. Most biotics need to think about it as they do the motion and summon the power.^_

He raised an eyebrow, and I was suddenly caught in a singularity. _)I'm not most biotics.( _He let the singularity fade, and I landed on my feet with a faint oomph. _)Let me put it this way. I could concentrate on what I'm doing and lose track of what's going on around me, or I can just them do what I need and keep my focus a little more spread out. And not using or needing hand movements has come in handy a few times in the past.(_

_ ^Yes, but the biotics that do use the hand movements have more power within the biotic they use. It's the motion and how they do it that makes their brain perceive it as more force being needed. I'm not saying that you need to do it every time but it might be a good idea to try it out.^_

_ )I find I actually have more control over what I'm doing if I don't use hand motions, since I'm concentrating more.( _He shrugged. _)If it ain't broke…(_

_ ^Yes, but control isn't what I'm talking about. It's power. You are limiting yourself by not using them. You can't teleport without the motions because it uses momentum to direct how far and where the next wormhole will open.^_

He conceded the point with a nod. _)There's an exception to every rule. Charge is another one. I could easily slam you into the wall if I hit you now. If I was running at you first, I could probably knock you through it. Difference is, the latter telegraphs it, while the former leaves you unable to tell what I'm about to do. Same with hand motions. Might as well call them hand signals.(_

_ ^Hey, sometimes the power they can bring is worth the quick glimpse at your next move. God, I feel like I'm talking about Yu-gi-oh cards with you.^_

He gave me a blank look.

_ ^Trust me, I was only into them in sixth grade. Haven't touched them since.^_

_ )...Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiggggghhhhht. Anyway, yeah, if I'm fighting Iron or someone like that, I'm going to all out and go for power first, second, and third. Unless it gets like that though, I try to reign myself in a little.( _He shrugged again. _)You have to worry about not giving up your emotion. I gotta worry about not giving in to mine.(_

_ ^I don't have to worry about giving them up, it's the taking them back part that I might not do.^_

He chuckled darkly. _)Probably a moral in there somewhere. I run on emotion and have to suppress them, you run on logic and have to hold on to them…argh, please tell me I didn't seriously just turn the subject to philosophy.( _

I opened my mouth but was cut off with Tali's voice saying "Ready to go."

**S7: First off, Viper5delta, all I can say is that you have every right to dislike my character and I respect your decision to dislike him. You have to be one of the only people I can say I am not offended by the way you put it.**

**(Meanwhile, Bourne is somehow winning the poll. How? I'm like...the funniest person!)**

***You're the main antagonist of SiaWoF- people are kinda supposed to hate you.***

**^Okay, who is second and third? If I am a loser I at least wish to be allowed the title of first loser.^**

**T117:...Uh, at the present, you're in fourth place. **

**^... Kinda saw this coming. For one all your fans are coming because this is from your channel.^**

**T117: Hey, you guys suggested the poll, not me. **

**S7: Besides, jokes on everyone that is doing this to try and lower my self esteem. I HAVE NONE!**

**(I know! Way to take all the fun out of it…I'm at least in second place, right?)**

***No, that'd be me. You're in third.***

**^Again, that's what to be expected. Especially since you forgot to put Cecelia on the poll.^**

**T117:... **Trebor117 has been logged off by the sheer force of his facepalm.

**)Sometimes I wonder if he gave me perfect memory specifically for reasons like this.(**

**T117: Okay, after I post this, I'll change that so she's on there.**

**S7: Maybe we should do one for POVs? Like which character do people like to read from. Granted Bourne is probably going to take first because of all your fan boys and Tali second because Talimancers stand up for Tali no matter where she is and what position she is in or if she is even written correctly.**

**T117: I can't really argue with that. Though I feel kinda like a dick for not being able to.**

**S7: Don't. It's… (Dramatic pause) the truth I accepted when we first started writing this. Actually, I was prepared for more hate than we have received so I am actually pleasantly surprised by this fic.**

**^Considering you were contemplating calling it off before you two were done with the first two chapters because you were afraid of the backlash. You definitely imagined it worse than they are.^**

**T117: Maybe if/when we do the sequel, we ought to put it up on your profile instead of mine just to show how little we care about said backlash.**

***Yeah, but the trouble with that is it might be hard for people to find or they might miss it because it's not on yours.***

**(Also, not as many people follow him, so…)**

**~Again, he has no self esteem so your words fall on deaf ears, Iron.~**

**(Yeah, whatever.)**

**~Well then, if you do a sequel, will I get a POV since Tali isn't in it until near half way through the game?~**

**)Well, I dunno about Spike, but T117's had other character's POVs in SaWoF. So far, Miranda, Kasumi, and maybe Jack. So there's always the option of something similar. Or hell, they could do a character in that that they never used the POV in their separate stories.(**

**S7: Well, Kasumi is going to be replacing Tali and Layla is replacing Danny.**

**^Danny isn't getting a POV?!^**

**S7: There is reasoning behind it.**

**(Did that reasoning come in a bottle, or in little white lines?)**

**S7: More of the story called for it. I don't wanna give too much away for fear of spoilers.**

**T117: Yeah, besides, that'll probably be months from now at least. Who knows how much our minds'll change between now and then.**

**S7: My story is pretty set. The only thing I don't have figured out is whether Layla and Ty will have anything romantic happening.**

**~Wooh there, why not?~**

**S7: Because I fucking hate romance.**

**(Explains why you're one of the few people that seems to hate Tali.)**

**T117: Right, because we've all seen how much _you _love her.**

**(Isn't murder like the ultimate crime of passion or some bullcrap?)**

**^I think his problem with Tali is that she is a manipulative bitch in reality but nobody ever tells her no or breaks it off with her.^**

**T117:...Okay, I don't even think I could guess what you mean by that.**

**)But do you really want him to explain it and piss off like every talimancer reading this?(**

**(Considering the *ahem* ending, to Users, I don't think it'd make things all that much worse.)**

**S7: I actually got more hate for that when it happened then what I got from this.**

**T117: Yeah, I know what you mean; I got hit with a lot of people all pissy cause I brought Iron back in the rebooted version. Or people asking me to keep the one scene he first appears in and leave it at that.**

**S7: I killed Tali and still think I made a mistake by giving in and allowing people to talk me into bringing her back.**

**(You can always kill her off in the collector base instead. Or have her blow up with the Normandy.)**

**^Not gonna lie he has that written on his Users 2 timeline. Or at least has it branching off where he may kill her.^**

**(I figured. T117 has a similar one for Jacob.)**

**S7: You know, that's kinda a copout. Why not write him into a better character instead of just killing him? It just seems lazy to just blast him dead.**

**T117: I've already got 11 other characters I actually care about, not including Bourne and Raptor.**

**(Besides, knowing him he'll keep torturing Bourne by like almost killing Jacob and then having him survive somehow.)**

**T117: That's...actually something I might do. I haven't decided yet.**

**S7: It doesn't matter how you feel about the others. Turning one that everyone hates into one that is even semi-lovable is a feat. Especially, a writer as good as people claim you are.**

**T117: I'm not a miracle worker here. I'm just saying: he's got one offensive power, which he hardly ever uses once you get barrier cause he'll just spam that, and not in a good way, he's the only LI that'll cheat on/break up with Shepard if romanced, the token black guy thing like you mentioned, and in the first bloody mission he hides behind the one crate that'll break apart instantly.**

**S7: Well, you know what, to make up for me screwing over Kaidan in Users, I'll make Jacob a bro.**

**(Aahahahahaahahahaahahaahaahahaahahahaahaahahaahahaahaahahahahaahaahahahaahahaahahaahahahaahahahahahahaahahahahahaahahahaahahaahahahahahahaahahahahahaaaahahaahaahahaaha!)**

***What Iron said.* )I hate that I agree with him.(**

**T117: Yeah, good luck with that. **

**S7: Just wait, I can pull it off hopefully.**

**)Yeah, the trouble is that'd be kinda out of character with Jacob. I mean, you could theoretically make him not suck, but you'd basically have to change a lot about him.(**

**^So long as I can manipulate code and we screw with the story how we do. Jacob can have the experiences to become likable.^**

**(I know we made a lot of jokes about you being god or whatnot, but making him not suck would be the thing that really tipped you into 'way overpowered'.)**

**S7: He meant that with the whole code manipulation by the Collector, the experiences that they will have could be nothing like the regular story. Thus, Jacob won't have the same experiences and he could have those that could make him a better person besides just solving his daddy issues. He will go from being the Shinji of Mass Effect to the Simon of Mass Effect.**

**T117:...You're considering completely derailing the story and having to deal with that, just so you can make Jacob not suck?**

**)Also, we're not anime people, so that sorta reference goes completely over our heads...I'm guessing that's anime anyway.(**

**S7: Yes, I blame comicon for me using those references. Shinji is a little bitch while Simon is a badass.**

**)So, he'll go from being Iron to being me.(**

**(Oh, that is hitting way below the belt!)**

**^Bingo.^**

**T117: So what mission do you think will be the hardest to write? Mordin's recruitment gave me some trouble for some reason.**

**^Grunt's.^**

**S7: It's just so boring. Might have to put a virus in to make it interesting.**

**T117: You know, a story I'm following had the author mention Grunt's was hard cause it was his least favorite recruitment in the game.**

**S7: Well yeah, think about it. It's mostly just a stroll from point A to point B.**

**(While shooting at things.)**

**T117: Yeah, I guess there is that...you ever seen a story where Shepard decides to not open the tank? **

**S7: Not yet.**

**T117: Guess it's just kinda a given.**

**S7: Guess so. Well, I think that is all we got to talk about this time.**

**T117: So, we killed the poll for CTHI, since we decided that name's way better than CRTNI or G.D., I'll fix the character poll to add Cecelia...yeah, that does it. You guys know the drill with questions.**

**(Not that most of them actually ask them or review in general.)**

**T117: Anyway, Sayonara.**

**S7:1473I2**


	30. Is that a Crossbow!

**Bourne:**

I followed the others into the airlock, wondering how much merit Ty's words had. _Power vs control. Iron would go for power...and Hero would go for control. But maybe that's why Iron's more powerful than me here...that or Saren did something. Could be both._

"So, Bourne, if you don't mind me asking-" Tali's voice brought me out of my thoughts. "What happened to your armor?"

"He killed it horribly."

I glared at Ty. "I believe Iron killed it." Tali seemed to unconsciously flinch at the name, though I knew there was no way she could know who I was talking about. "And either way, don't expect me to shed any tears over it. Yours is a little more...mature than mine was. And more obedient."

Ty shrugged. "They still have brains and somewhat feelings."

"I agree with you on one of those." I said flatly.

Ty nodded and started making popping sounds with his mouth.

I decided I was probably better off not knowing and leaned against the wall, thinking. _If Iron's stronger because he's uncontrolled...all the more reason not to follow his example. _I looked down at my hands- or rather my gloves. _He did exactly what I wanted him to- switch us back. But because he just cut loose, he also caused a million other things...or did he do it deliberately? But then, why would he get rid of my armor and not Ty's?...then again, with Drew, he can't morph his armor, so maybe Iron did it deliberately. But how could he warp something one way and something else another way? And if he could control it, why not just warp away our powers and take his time with us? _I shook my head. _Of course, the real question is why I'm trying to apply reason to a psychopath like him._

Still, questions gnawed at me. Why Feros, and why then? Why'd he destroy the Geth for us? And how long before we'd have to deal with him again? _)Ty, can you do me a favor and start a conversation? I need something to take my mind off the situation, and we don't have time to get drunk again.(_

"Hey, what's your favorite football team Jason?"

_)Is football even still around?( _

_ ^Does it matter? Tali doesn't know what it is.^_

I shrugged. "I'm really not much of a sports fan."

"I saw that in some vids once I got on the Citadel. It was a team called the Vikings."

Ty perked up a bit. "You saw the vikes?"

Tali nodded. "They were playing in something called Super Bowl XCVI."

Ty grabbed her by the shoulders and pinned her to a wall. "Tali, this could completely affect my feelings toward you. Did they win?"

"Um, the announcer said they did right at the end. He said it was the first time they had gone to the Super Bowl and won."

Ty jumped into the air and landed on his knees. "Hells yeah!"

I shook my head. "Dude, it's just a stupid game." _That oughta piss him off. _

"There is nothing you can say to piss me off. The Vikes won a Super Bowl!"

_And that doesn't really surprise- actually,.._ "So if I said they were a bunch of low IQ neanderthals, that wouldn't piss you off?"

"They are a bunch of low IQ neanderthals that won the Super Bowl."

I chuckled despite myself. "Had to test it."

The door opened and Ty shot out the door. "Let's go, I have to tell Cecelia!"

_Let's see, at that speed, he should be able to slow down if I put the barrier- there. _He only barely managed to avoid slamming into it. "Yeah, great plan. Leave the team so you can tell her a sports team won the superbowl ages ago."

Ty took a step and then fell into a glitch. He popped up in front of us and grabbed Tali's wrist. "What are you talking about? You are the one that refused to get in the glitch." With that he yanked her in and was gone.

_The annoying thing, since I got him his own ass handed to him, I can't even be all that mad at him. _I shook my head. _Well, I could try sprinting there and be several minutes behind them and be beaten to within an inch of my life for the third time today, or I could try teleporting there and risk killing myself…Somehow, that second choice actually seems the better one._

Ty suddenly shot out of the glitch again and grabbed my arm. "You are lucky that I'm not that big of a dick."

With one motion he pulled me through the glitch and we were standing outside the door to the Varren cavern. I turned to glare at him. "You treat all your friends like this?"

"So we're friends now?"

I blinked in surprise. "Huh?"

Ty leaned on the wall near Tali who was sitting on the ground. "Asked me if I treat all my friends like I do you. Does that mean we are friends?"

After a moment, I laughed. "You do remember I threw you out of an elevator this morning, right?"

"You do remember that I beat your face in down the fifty story drop?"

"Was that what you were doing? I thought you were just really bad at giving massages."

"You couldn't move your jaw afterwards. You can't play tough about it."

"Yeah, I was lying. I just didn't much feel like chit chatting at the time." I kept my face emotionless, and hoped he wouldn't be able to tell I was full of shit.

"Dude, you aren't playing this. You were the one talking to me through the mind link."

"The what?"

We both turned to look at Tali, then exchanged a look that translated to "ah crap."

"Tali, the nanites that make me up and give Bourne his powers are interlinked. We can talk using this link without anyone hearing. That's why you will see us just sit there sometimes and do nothing. Because we are chatting through the mind link. Now that I have told you this, you are going to keep it a secret, right?"

I had to resist the urge to facepalm.

"You don't have to talk to me like I am a child Ty. I can keep a secret."

"Oh, little miss gossip, prior history would say otherwise."

_)Than maybe don't piss her off and make her **want** to spill!(_

Set her gaze and stood up. "I won't tell anyone, I swear."

"Good, then you can forget what I said you had to do earlier. We will count this as the retribution."

"Just out of curiousity, what was it he wanted you to do?" I asked, not really expecting an answer.

"Nothing", they both said at the same time.

_...why are they so reluctant to tell me? _A moment later, I swore as I realized I'd voiced the question aloud.

"Why is Bourne speaking in the second person?"

This time, I did not resist the urge to facepalm. "When are we going to find something to kill?" I immediately removed my hand from my face so I could do a repeat. "And why did I just jinx us?"

The door behind us exploded outward and Saren was standing behind the blown doors looking like he was keeping proper etiquette. "Bourne how are you? Ty, I hope you got injured by the blast."

"Saren, I hope you have been… keeping it together."

Saren hissed and shot forward faster than I could follow and pinned Ty to the wall. "You insolent fool! I will be sure to gut you with your own glaive!"

I yanked him towards me from where I was on the ground, then charged him in midair. The explosion left him stunned on the ground, but I knew it wouldn't kill him- nothing would right now.

_)Ty, if you've got any tips, now might be a good time.(_

_ ^Don't do what you just did.^_ Ty held his ground but let Saren stand back up.

"Bourne, you are like an insolent child. You don't understand the situation or the timing." The Turian gloated.

I flicked a knife into each hand. "I know I can't kill you. Doesn't mean I can't beat you within an inch of your miserable life." I smiled grimly. "Or maybe I'll just cut off a mandible or two. Seemed to work pretty well with the last guy."

Saren held his hand out and flicked it up causing me to fly up and be pinned to the ceiling. "If you paid attention to Ty's story, you would have known that I can do that and this isn't an attack visit. It's more of a threatening hello."

"Then let me down so I can shake your hand." I said with a mock pleasant smile. _Or maybe just rip it off. _"But considering that the last guy that threatened me was a _little bit _taller than you, you'll have to work pretty hard to actually scare me."

He made a crushing motion with his hand and the pain in my body spiked- still bearable, but only just. "Now, Ty, back to you. I see you wear the mark of corruption well."

Ty stood up to him and wiped the bottom of his nose. "Yeah, it's like my hero symbol."

"Except it means you are one of us."

"What are you talking about?"

I would have facepalmed again if I could move. As it was, I decided to just be quiet and hope he might be dumb enough to forget about me and maybe give me a chance to strike.

Saren poked the zero. "This is the mark of all who are corrupted. Corruption makes it so the AI has less control over you. The more that is corrupt, the less control it has."

Tyy looked down at the zero and rubbed it contemplating what Saren just said. "I can have more power and keep my emotions?"

I grimaced as Saren's evil smile grew. "Yes, all you have to do is come with me. I learned a ton about corruption in our last life and one of those was how to expand it."

Ty's hand quickly flew to Saren's chest and he yelled, "Data purge!"

A red aura shot out of Ty's hand and knocked Saren back into the room causing him to lose focus on me. I caught myself with my biotics as fell, and I landed on my feet, as light as a feather. _)For a minute there, I thought you might take him up on his offer.( _

_ ^Then we must not be friends if you don't know me well enough to know I wouldn't betray you.^_

_ )Maybe millisecond would be more accurate; I'm a pessimist, remember? If I really thought you were going to do it, I'd have started swearing at you.( _I turned to where Saren had landed as he got back up. _)So, how do we play this?(_

_ ^You have to wait for his move and act faster.^_

Saren stood up and looked more pissed than ever."I was really hoping you would have worked with me Ty."

One of the Varen jumped at Saren to attack him but he caught it by the throat and it began to change. Within seconds it was a human, with glowing blue lines across his body. An emerald coat went down to his boots, and his head was covered by a red mask and a black hat.

After a moment, my eyes widened, placing a name to him. "Blade."

Saren's mandibles split in what could only have been a smile. "I looked through your files as well Bourne. You had some very powerful people to choose from. But since you never finished Fable 3, this character was far more powerful."

"...Dude, Fable 3 sucked **ass**. Hell yeah I stuck to Fable 2 and leveled him to-" I cut myself off. "You know Ty, I think things would almost have been simpler if you were as crazy as he is. I would have just died in the first ten minutes and not had to deal with this type of crap."

Ty smiled at me and shrugged. "What fun is that?"

A crossbow bolt hit him in chest and he tumbled backwards into the water below us. "I'll be right back!"

I swore under my breath as I dodged another bolt. _You'd think for all the effort I put into finding all those damn gargoyles and getting that super cross bow, he'd be aiming it somewhere other than me! _ I rolled under the next one and threw my hand towards the Hero. He flew backwards into the wall. A moment later, energy flared around him, and I was thrown back by a fireball. It hit me with enough force to make me stumble to the edge, and his crossbow sent me following Ty.

I looked down, but didn't see him or his glitch portal. I activated my biotics to slow myself down, wondering how the hell I was supposed to get back up there. _No way I can charge up from this angle. _

A hand shot out of the wall and grabbed me by the heel. "I gotcha."

_)Thanks. For a minute I thought I'd have to try teleporting up, and now isn't the time to practice.(_

I was yanked up and into the portal to the entryway to the water plant by an angry Shepard. "Where is Tali?"

I yanked my ankle out of her grip and flipped in the air so I landed on my feet. "I don't know. I couldn't see much from down there." I scanned the room, but didn't see the quarian, the User, or the Hero of Bowerstone. _)Ty?(_

_ ^I jumped through another portal to get Tali. We are hiding behind the destroyed Tank in the room.^_

_ )Blade in there too?( _A sudden sound of a small tornado answered that question for me, and I darted in, considering my options. _If I get too close, he can slice my head off with that electrified katana he has. Or I might not be able to react before he can cast a spell…)Is it weird that I find the magic the most unbelievable part of all this?(_

_ ^Help us, now!^_

_ )What did you think I was running in here for, a fiesta?( _I ran at Blade full sprint, and as he turned, crossbow coming up, I hit him full force with the strongest charge I could muster, sending him into the far wall. _)At this point, only a giant troll would have been a real threat to him in the game. So we're going to need a plan, or a really big gun…( _I glanced over at the tank. _)Any chance you could get that thing working? Or at least the guns working?( _I looked over at the Hero as he got back to his feet, and tossed a singularity at him. It made him stumble, but he wasn't sucked in.

He raised his hand, and the ghostly images of several varren lunged at me. I slammed a foot into the ground, and my nova took care of them, but it also meant his lightning attack went right through my shields and drove me to the floor in pain.

_ ^Hang on, I want to try something!^_

"Data purge!" There was a bright flash that fired across the room and made Blade slam into the wall. _^Did it work?^_

He got back up with an enraged expression. _)Looks more like it just pissed him off.( _I got to my feet, and immediately dove to the side as he sent a set of glowing gold blades at where I'd been standing. They embedded in the far wall, and I managed a grim smile. _)But since those should have turned around and impaled me instead of continuing, it at least did something to him.(_

_ ^Just give me a sign and I will do that when you need me too. Tali got hit by an arrow and I am having some trouble taking it out with her suit.^_

_ )Great.( _I barely dodged another fireball. _)On the other hand, no way he'd actually be able to change spells on the fly like this in game. And since he has all of them-( _He was suddenly running at me much faster than should have been possible, so I met him head on with a biotic charge. He went flying like he'd been standing still, and I realized he was using time control. _)Then I think a plan is going to fail in about three seconds.(_

The hero looked up, then his head whipped to a spot behind me, and I heard Shepard and the others coming in. "What the hell's going on here?"

"Long story. Short version, that guy's got nanites, is really fast and tough, and I'm going to need help to take him down." No way was I going to tell her he was a magic user.

"Is that a crossbow?" She asked as he raised it at me, and I stopped the bolt cold with a barrier in front of him.

"It's more powerful than it looks." I deadpanned. "Trust me on that one."

"Yeah, Tali got hit and I am still digging it out of her." Ty's voice broke in from where he and she had taken shelter.

"Okay, here is the plan. Wrex, run interference. Garrus get in sniper position. Bourne, get ready to hit him hard."

"Not sure how much harder I can hit him, but sounds like a plan." _Wrex can survive being stabbed or set on fire a little better than I can. _"Just be careful. He's not exactly a pushover." The ghostly varren that popped up on both sides of me seemed to back up that claim. I threw a warp orb at each, and rolled to the side as he fired his crossbow again. "And don't get close. That sword is electrified, and one slice can take your head clean off." I put a domed barrier around him to contain him so we could catch our breath.

"You have a flaming omni-blade. So, use that." Cecellia replied.

_Yeah, except the last two times I needed it in a situation like this- _I clenched my fist and my omni-tool appeared- sans blade. "Yeah, it's completely fucked. Again."

"That's not my fault." Ty yelled from his spot.

"I was actually planning on blaming Iron." I pulled out my shotgun and wrapped myself in a barrier. "I'll just have to go with the backup plan. If we keep him off balance and don't give him a chance to focus, we should be able to take him down."

"Should?" Garrus said skeptically.

"Didn't say it'd be easy." The hero pulled out his sword and started slicing at the barrier, the electric field disrupting it, though not enough that he could get through, and we began moving into position. "If we can get his weapons away from him, then it might get a little easier though."

"Data purge!" The red flare shot through and blasted the sword out of his hand.

_)I have no idea what you're doing, but keep doing it. It seems to be working.( _A moment later, the barrier disintegrated. _)Or not.( _

Ty slammed his shoulder into the Hero's side and sent him stumbling into Wrex, who picked him up and tossed him across the room.

I smiled and slammed into him as well- though I was going a lot faster and hit him a lot harder. I threw a warp field at him, then slammed my fist into his face as I detonated a Nova. He was actually knocked through the fragile wall of rock, and into the next room.

Despite that, he got up as if nothing had happened. _)Geez, I know I had a lot of resurrection phials stored up, but didn't think there were this many.(_

A shot flew past my shoulder and nailed him square in the head as he threw out a force push. I was barely able to keep myself upright, though I had the wind knocked out of me, and had to step back to keep my balance.

He got back up with a scowl on his face. "What's it take to kill this guy?" Garrus yelled from behind me.

_Well, since the max number of those phials you can carry is 9, and he's used 3 by now- _"Just keep it up. He's tough, but he isn't invinci-" I moved my leg so I could step through, and a crossbow bolt wizzed between my legs. After briefly making sure things were still attached, I looked at the Hero with pure rage. "YOU ARE DEAD!"

I slammed into him hard enough to knock him through another wall, even though I hadn't been moving. I didn't think about it though, beyond pulling him to me and punching him into a different spot on the wall.

"Bourne, what's up with your biotics?" Cecelia's voice caused me to look at my arms, which were now tinged purple and red along with the normal blue. For a moment, I was confused. Then it hit me: _Iron set us to what we had last time we were here. So Ty has Drew, and I have Iron and Hero's sets of implants. _I smiled as I slammed one fist into another. _Which means I've got thrice the normal power. _

As Blade stood up, I charged into him yet again, and drove my fist into his gut, hitting him hard enough he was embedded in the ceiling. "Ty, can I borrow your glaive for a sec?"

Ty grabbed the glaive off his back and tossed it to me. It came in fast at first but slowed down so I could safely catch it. "Thanks."

I stuck it into the ground below the hero and hit him with a pull field that brought him out of the ceiling. He didn't scream even as it impaled him, and I could see it through his back. "Anyone seen his sword so I can cut his head off too?" I said as I slammed a fist into the hero's face. He was knocked out for a moment before snapping back- just in time for the other fist. "Or maybe something else?"

"Don't you think that's a bit-"

I cut Garrus off mid sentence."He tried to castrate me with a fucking crossbow!" I raised my foot, and slammed that into his face too.

"Bourne, I think I know why we can't kill him." Ty said.

_)He can only have a max of 9 of those Resurrection Phials. Once he's out of those….he can be knocked out and get a scar. Fuck. We might just have to cut his head off and keep it away from his body or something.(_

_^But if Shepard kills him, he is gone for good.^_

_ )...Seriously dude, this is the type of thing it's helpful to know in advance.( _"I'm going to go look for it. Feel free to keep beating the crap out of him until I get back." _)Which, if I know anything about Cecelia-(_

She shoved her pistol in his mouth and pulled the trigger, splattering his brains along the fall wall.

"Fine. I'm still looking for the sword though."

"Why?" Garrus asked.

"Souvenir."

I looked to where Ty was and saw him holding the sword up. "Dibs."

"Oh, fuck you dude. Seriously, near castration. I think that trumps dibs...and I call double dibs FYI."

"Not how it works. Plus, you took the knife that the Krogan impaled me with. Give me that and this is yours."

"Do either of you idiots even know how to use that thing?" Cecelia broke in.

"A sword, fuck yeah. As Tucker said, 'What's so hard to understand about swish swish stab, it's a sword not a fighter jet.'"

After a moment, I realized I actually did know to use one, thanks to the download I'd gotten from Ty. "Yeah, but you already have an axe and the glaive." I crossed my arms. "And since your stupid omni-blades keep shorting out-"

The sword fell apart into code in his hands, and when I turned to look at Blade, the only thing I saw was a varren impaled on said glaive. "Know what, sword's all yours buddy."

Cecelia held her hands up to stop his reply, along with everyone else's. "If someone doesn't tell me what just happened in the next ten seconds, it's going to look this guy got a quick death."

"He did." Wrex commented. "You shot him in the head."

_)You're the 'nanite' expert. I actually know what just happened, and I still have no idea what just happened.(_

"Cecelia, babe, Saren was just here and it kind of turns out that he has the same control over the nanites that I do."

"...did you really just call me 'babe'?"

Ty rubbed the back of his head. "Don't like it?"

"How did you go from threatening us for info to talking about your love life?" I commented, after making sure I was out of Cecelia's punching range.

There was the sound of a portal and Ty popped up behind Shepard and wrapped his hands around her waist. "Is something wrong Cecelia?"

After a moment's hesitation, Cecelia's hand flew up and popped Ty in the face. "Bourne has point, Ty has the rear. Let's go."

_)So she wants you staring at her ass?...I can't decide if I want that to be the case, or want it to be pure coincidence…unless she's staring at mine. Ugh, that's even worse.(_

**Cecelia:**

Bourne pulled his shotgun out and had it at the ready as they moved back out into the central chamber beneath the colony. Ty retrieved his glaive and closed his faceplate before readying his assault rifle.

Tali took up position on Shepard's left, while Wrex took the left. She looked no worse for wear, despite having been shot. "How you feeling Tali?"

Tali rubbed her side and Shepard noticed some patch work. "Ty used his nanites to clear the infectious material. I just had to patch it."

Shepard nodded and then motioned for everyone to move and within minutes they were to the elevator that led to the colony's Mako.

"How do you want to split us up Shepard?" Bourne asked, then suddenly turned to glare at Ty. "And seriously dude, I will lock you in a room if that's the only way for you two to-"

Ty stepped to the wall and hopped into one of his glitches. "I have my own way up."

"I hate it when he does that." Cecelia and Bourne said nearly in unison.

Cecelia motioned for everyone to get into the elevator but she was caught by an arm. Ty was standing by the wall and had a smirk on his face. "Need a lift?"

"Seriously, will you two just hook up already and get it over with?...and why did I think saying that loud was a good idea?" Bourne said as he took a step back, looking annoyed with himself.

Ty reached into the glitch and there was a loud whack in the elevator before Ty pulled his hand back out. "Quiet Bourne, and one more thing." Ty reached back in and the elevator closed.

"Now", he pulled his hand out and held it out to her. "Need. A . Lift?"

Cecelia looked at Ty and bit her lower lip realizing that she was scared. "You sure I can do this?"

There was a glint of madness in Ty's eye but it only made her trust him more as he said, "Completely."

She was a bit hesitant at first but she grabbed Ty's hand and held on tight. "If I get sick from this I am going to beat you."

"Can't be worse than what you did earlier."

Ty pushed the glitch open and dragged her into it. The inside of the portal was not what she expected, it was like a tube that was covered in ones and zeroes while changing colors. Cecelia began to relax just as it ended and Ty pulled her out right by the elevator.

"What did you think?"

"That was the weird- second weirdest thing I have ever done. While sober."

Ty scratched the back of his head. "I don't know if I want to ask this but, what was the first?"

"You're right. You don't want to ask."

"Well, now I have to know." As he said it he got a huge smile on his face.

She smiled back. "Guess you'll have to find a way to convince me to tell you."

Ty kicked a rock up from the ground and caught it in his hand. It began to morph and change until it became some kind of weird and gigantic gauntlet. "How about a pneumatic gauntlet?"

"You know, some guys would have tried flowers first. Which is why I wouldn't have given them that one more breath." She said with a shake of the head. "Long story short-"

The doors to the elevator slid open before should finish explaining, and she immediately noticed both Garrus and Wrex were covered in blue energy. Bourne stormed out of the elevator past them, followed somewhat meekly by Tali. "You know Ty, I get that you wanted to work the romantic angle, but next time- maybe try the reverse where it's the two of you in a confined space instead of me and these two idiots?" He seemed to be looking more at Garrus than Wrex as he said that.

Ty slipped the gauntlet on his hand and looked at Bourne. "Check this out, I thought it counted as a weapon but apparently it's armor."

"Yeah, your track record for weapons isn't great." He brought up his omni-tool pointedly. "So, what, that's just a glove to hit really hard with?"

He held out one finger and tapped one of the boulders next to him. Without warning it fired off and flew down the walkway and embedded into a wall. After that Ty flexed his fingers in the glove and held it out to shake Bourne's hand.

The biotic rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I could do the same thing with my biotics were I so inclined." Despite that, he looked at it with approval. "What happened to the whole technocyte cancels armor morphing thing?"

"I made this out of a rock. Plus, Drew doesn't cancel out armor. He just uses the metal from it to construct himself. Once he is fully made I can slip stuff like this on or put armor on over it."

He shook his head and turned back to the elevator. "Now, are you two done giving me the third degree, or do I have to leave you in there a while longer? Blink twice for 'I'm done being a moron' and three times for 'I want to stay like this.' Or just keep glaring for 'I want to stay like this indefinitely.'".

Cecelia tapped him on the shoulder and just said. "Let them go, please."

He turned to look at her with as much surprise as his face ever showed. "You actually just said please?...did you hit your head when I wasn't looking, or-" He seemed to realize finishing that sentence was a bad idea, and the two were released as he snapped his fingers.

She rolled her eyes and continued walking. "I said please because I didn't want to hit you so hard that you get put out of action. We already lost Hero and Liara."

"I can see how losing the only other good biotic here might be a bad thing." He replied with a small smile.

Wrex growled something under his breath that Shepard didn't hear. "Uh, speak up Wrex. We _all _want to hear what you have to say."

"I believe his exact words were 'give me five minutes, and I'll show you what a 'good biotic' really is.' To which I say, name the time and place." He turned to Shepard. "Give the crew another fight to bet on."

Shepard rubbed her chin. "I think it would be better to see you versus Ty."

He laughed. "Shepard, I'm mildly sociopathic, not suicidal." His smile didn't quite reach his eyes. It was obvious he didn't like the thought of Ty being stronger than him.

"Well, then whoever wins between you and Wrex will have to face Ty."

Ty shook his head. "There is no way I am getting back in the ring."

Bourne seemed to be biting his tongue.

"Something to say Bourne?" Cecelia asked.

"I was going to say something about Hero going easier on him than I would- but then it occurred to me that he was going way easier on her than he could on me."

Ty swung at the wall and took a huge chunk out of it. "Can we go? This is getting boring."

"Yeah, I guess compared to almost drowning, being thrown out of an elevator, and having your girlfriend beat the shit out of you, it would be." Bourne said, already moving towards the garage.

Cecelia began to follow him but Ty caught up to her and whispered. "I could go give him a pat on the back for his smart witt."

"Ty, I have almost superhuman hearing, remember? Try it, and you'll be wishing for a repeat of what she did."

"I forget you are the now most broken character in this universe."

He turned around with a skeptical look on his face. "I fail to see how gene mods or biotics- even as strong as mine are- are more 'broken' than what you can do."

"Do you really want to start an argument over who is weaker Bourne?"

"Depends on how we define weaker."

Everyone began piling in the mako and Ty said. "Who is the one that gloats about crushing a turian's head by shoving a singularity down his throat?"

"That's not so much power as it is strategy." He shrugged. "I believe the term you used to describe yourself was a glass cannon. I'm less fragile, but I'm more like a shotgun than cannon. An argument could be made for explosive rounds though."

Cecelia shook her head and took the driver's seat. "Okay, who has the gun between you Mary sues?"

"...what?"

"Just get on the gun one of you."

"Dibs." Bourne said before Ty could even open his mouth, already halfway into the seat.

Once everyone was in, Cecelia hit the gas and shot through the doors as the opened. Immediately upon exiting, she was face to face with two armatures forcing her to swerve right.

A rocket hit one square in the head, though machine gun fire missed by several meters. "A little warning next time would be nice." Bourne said distractedly, moving the guns so they were lined up with the giant Geth.

Cecelia caw that he was aimed perfectly and held the tank as steady as possible. With one shot he blew the unit apart. He immediately shifted his aim to the second one. Looking at the way, she realized that they were just wasting time on the armatures and gunned it forward.

"Sorry, Bourne, we will have to scrap these things later."

"Whatever." He said with a shrug. "I'll just keep them from getting any funny ideas- keep them down and unable to fire back."

"Okay, I'm going to be doing a lot more dodging than actual tanking so you are going to have a hard time hitting anything."

"I'm sure I've ridden with way worse drivers than you." He said, cracking his knuckles.

"Yeah, like the last girl you slept with."

"I would reply to that, but I know it'd only give you or Ty more ammo to use later."

The rest of the ride was filled with dodges and hard turns until a strange voice came over the radio. "We've got movement- not one of the geth."

Cecelia looked back at the others. "Want to check it out?"

"Might as well." Bourne said with a shrug.

She pulled over and opened the tank up. "Alright, Bourne and Ty stay with the Mako. Wrex, Garrus Tali, and I will check the people out."  
**Ty:**

"So, why did we get left here?"

Bourne shrugged. "Well, considering that I stabbed that stupid pencil pusher last time I was here, probably not a bad call. As for you...No clue."

"This place was blown up for me."

He didn't comment on that one.

"So, am I making you sick with my stuff and Cecelia?"

He laughed. "If I had a credit for every time I joked about Raptor and Liara...it's one of my types of humor I still enjoy after all this...but seriously dude- the second you get that stuff off of you, she is going to be jumping your bones. Maybe before." He laughed suddenly. "She'd be the only person to not only get a guy's first time, but also an AI's."

"What?"

He pointed at my head. "Drew?"

I facepalmed. "She won't be my first time."

"...I seem to recall you saying that Layla never actually saw you naked."

"And I have had more women in my life than just Layla, dumbass. Why do you think I have the catch trick down?"

"...still would be Drew's first though." he said with a shrug after a moment.

"Drew doesn't have sex and what makes you think he will be around that long?"

He crossed his arms. "Geez, learn how to take a joke...pot talking to kettle, I know, but the point doesn't change."

"You learn how to make one."

He rolled his eyes. "Speaking of your ex, she said she'd be dropping by later, but I haven't seen her. Any idea what she'd want to talk to me about? Or why she'd want to talk to me at all?" He put his hand on his chin thoughtfully. "And come to think about it, Danny said he wasn't supposed to talk to us until Feros, but we haven't seen him either."

"Just enjoy the reprieve bro. I'm glad I don't' have to listen to those assholes now."

"What happened to Danny being your BFF?"

"He can still be my friend and an asshole."

"Yeah, good point."

"So, what do you plan to do with Ash?"

His face went instantly into expressionless mode, and his lips seemed to seal shut.

"So, nothing, got it."

He leaned back in his chair until he was looking straight at the ceiling. "I don't really know, alright? Before I had the excuse of Arnold, but now...well, my ultimate goal is to get back to Raptor's and Ashley- my version of her. So if I hook up with this one...just weirdness all around, let's leave it at that."

"Why will it be weird?"

He sighed. "Because, it'll be like cheating on her, yet at the same time not. Plus, it'd mean I'd basically be leaving this version behind like a cheap hooker or something."

"She will be leaving you in a few months anyway."

I expected him to glare, but all he did was slump further in his seat. "Why am I even here?"

"Because you get to meet me?"

That time, he did glare. "You are insufferable, you know that? I'm talking about why, out of all the possible suckers that may have been sucked into this bloody game, it was me that got paired up with you. We couldn't be more different. You're a demi-god, I barely rate a super soldier. The only reason Saren didn't just rip me apart was because he wants to make this theatrical and shit."

I shrugged. "Am I really that bad? Plus, you can say you have one friend in the real world."

He grimaced. "Ty, you don't seem to get that I no longer give a shit about the real world. Now, the universe I'm trying to get back to- that is my real world. It's why when Hero offered to try helping me get my memories back, I said no. And why I wouldn't change my answer if asked again."

"Not saying you need to change your answer, just letting you know that you have something to look forward to if you are forcibly kicked out."

He closed his eyes and leaned back again.

"Never thought about that?"

"Not when I was awake."

"What happens if that happens?"

He kept his eyes closed as he replied. "I've had 5 nightmares about it since I helped stop Saren. In one, I was locked in an asylum because Iron's personality resurfaced. In another, I killed someone because the training stuck. Another, I didn't get my memories back, so I had to become a hired gun- and got killed doing it because of a lack of modern tech or biotics." His eyes opened and fixed on me. "The other two, are personal."

"I have nightmares sometimes."

"Yeah. Arnold gave me a play by play of a couple of them."

"Like what?"

"It was when you passed out at the table. Night I told Arnold to tell me when you woke up and he didn't."

"That was a simulation, not a nightmare."

"Seemed like they were the same thing to Arnold...guess he was an AI though."

"Ever since I came into a game I dream in reality simulations. Those aren't nightmares."

"Seemed like at least one of those 'simulations' could have been called one."

I waved him off. "No, that wasn't a nightmare. My nightmares are what if I get back into the real world but retain my powers over code. Like a technopath."

He seemed to be torn. "I can't see how keeping my biotics would be terrible- long as I had control of them and kept them secret...or I could become a superhero." He added with a forced smile and laugh.

"Bourne, imagine being able to control the basic form of life's goals now."

His face went back to its usual blank state. "I wouldn't trust myself with something like that."

I pointed at him and gave a nod. "Bingo, but you know what's worse?"

He shook his head after thinking about it for a minute.

"Having to release my emotions so that my friends can survive. That would mean becoming a full digital entity so that everyone else could leave."

"That's a real possibility?"

I nodded my head to his question. "The consort in my world told me about the future and the image was worse than what ours was. I was standing on a hill with a dead woman at my feet. Reapers were circling in a mass that I don't even want to think about right now. Then, the vision panned up to my eyes and they were glowing green. A green that made me fear I will have to make a choice of that or losing the person at my feet."

"Do you know who it was?" He asked gently.

I shook my head. "And if gets worse, the vision has two equally likely scenarios. In the next one, the woman is clearly dead and the reapers are moving away from me as if I was commanding them. My eyes were Saren's in that vision."

"So how bad is option three?"

"No option three."

He paused. "You didn't see the other equally likely scenario?"

"There are only two. And the way the road is looking, I might have to kill Tali myself to change them."

He grimaced in reply.

I sat up straight and pulled up my omni-tool. I found a way to put blood dragon on it back in my world and I was surprised that Bourne never played it. With a few clicks it activated and the title music started playing.

"You'd never seen the woman before?" He asked, ignoring the game.

I opened right up to hunting a legendary tiger but kept my train of thought. "She was fogged in inky black stuff."

His brow furrowed slightly. "But you'd avoid getting attached to anyone, right? Or at least try?"

"That's the goal, Tali is my only limiter and I want to keep it that way… unless…" My mind wandered to Kasumi or Miranda but I waved that off. "Nah, no one."

He shook his head. "Ty...what if that woman isn't one in your world? What if it's one from this one?"

"No way, the AI never had this predicted."

He frowned slightly. "So maybe doing this could change things there? I mean, going up against Iron and Saren, you oughta learn a new trick or two. Or three." He shrugged. "If there's one thing I've learned, the future may be made out of stone, but there's a lot of room for it to shift if you hit it in the right spots."

"Bourne, my game goes crazy off the rails but always ends up in the same place it's supposed to. Remind me to tell you about Jean when we get back to the Normandy."

His brow furrowed again. "If you're so sure what's going to happen…" he trailed off, apparently unwilling to voice his thoughts aloud.

"What?" I looked away from him and popped him in the shoulder with a smile on my face. Showing him that I was not afraid of what was to come.

"Then it seems like you'd either have to fight it or give in, and you don't seem to be doing either."

"Bourne, I am the kind of guy that takes the punches as they come and rolls with them. I don't try to plan out my next move because it just doesn't work. When I plan, it always get's thrown off by person I'm planning against."

He gave me an odd look. "Seems like if you know what's supposed to happen, it'd be easier."

"How am I supposed to know what happens when the collectors will have Saren's powers to change what they want?"

"...damn, you're really up a creek without a paddle, aren't you?"

"I'll forge one from the exoskeletons of the bastards and keep going. I don't care if Sovereign can manipulate entire worlds. I'm not stopping until I win."

He shook his head. "It's like Karma works backwards in here. You're the optimistic guy it's hard to truly hate for more than five minutes, yet you get screwed over at every turn. Me, the pessimistic guy whose first instinct to deal with someone generally involves knives…It could be a lot worse for me."

I turned to him with my smile holding and a raised eyebrow. "You kidding? I can control armor, if there is a Praetorian in my way, I'll rip it apart with the armor of a space marine. If there is a Brute, I will go hand to hand with it in power armor. If there is an entire fucking Reaper,... well, that might be difficult to deal with. But I will find a way to beat it. Winning is my thing and I refuse to do anything else."

"Least you have a couple more of you running around. I'm a solo act."

Shrugging I said, "Not right now, we are more like the Blues Bros."

"I'd prefer that cousins was the closest we got in terms of family ties." He said with a smile, clearly not meaning it completely.

I looked back to my game and saw that it was closed now, and Layla was sitting on my lap. "Oh, shit."

"The hell did she even do that without one of us noticing?"

She looked at Bourne and smiled. "Because, unlike Ty, I am god."

"...I'm kinda thinking of going atheist then."

**(Boo! This chapter didn't have me in it!)**

**)I almost got castrated by a crossbow.(**

**(...Yeah, I guess that sorta makes up for it. A little.)**

**^Shit man, with all he estrogen you have been around, I would assume they have already shriveled up and fell off.^**

***Not to mention literally having a mind that's 1/3rd female.***

**^Hah, well I guess the boot fits.^**

**)You mean the boot with a very sharp knife that I know how to use very well?(**

**~You talking about castrating yourself there?~**

**(Nah, he's good with a knife, but even he can't hit a target that small.)**

**)Good thing your face is a nice big target then.(**

**~It's funny because you think that it will make you sound more masculine.~**

**)It's funny how you think you're clever.(**

**~It's funny how you think you're smart.~**

**)I'm sorry, am I supposed to somehow have respect for you now that you said basically the same thing I did but changed one word? Cause if anything, I now have less.(**

**~I don't know, maybe you should consider how childish you are acting by actually responding to Iron and Ty's comments. If you didn't then they would have dropped it but instead they are going to bring this up for the next couple chapters.~**

**^It's true.^**

**(I'da done that anyway though.)**

**~The point is that Bourne is doing exactly what he doesn't want to and dropping down to their level.~**

***And you somehow think you're not doing the same thing with that first exchange?***

**)Okay, changing the subject! Any questions from people that you guys see?(**

**(Uh...not really a question, but someone said something about wanting to see me kill a kitten in front of Cecelia to see how she'd react. They then said they're worried about their own sanity...yeah, you might wanna invest in a shrink.)**

**^Uh, do any of you guys have a question for Trebor and Spike?^**

**~Nope.~ *Nada.* )Not really.(**

**(I gotta ask-)**

If your question involves asking what drugs or alcohol they were on when they created their storys, I have subroutine that will automatically log you out.

**(...Then no. No questions here.)**

**S7: Alright, then I guess this chapter is over already.**

**T117: Does that make this the shortest AN yet you think?**

**(Well, you kinda seem to be running out of shit to talk about, debate about, or argue about.)**

**S7: Uh, I got nothing.**

**T117:...Yeah, me neither, really. Trouble is we've been writing for like 70 something chapters by now, so we used a lot of ideas in that.**

**S7: I got an idea to help us find something to talk about next chapter. We should play Portal 2.**

**T117: I thought you said you left that at your parent's place or something?**

**S7: I just picked it up yesterday.**

**T117: Then...I like that idea. Never have found anyone else to play through co-op with...man, I'm either going to suck cause I haven't played in so long, or it'll come right back to me.**

**)Either way you get GLaDOS lines, which're always funny as hell.(**

**S7: Okay, well, lets wrap this up.**

**(You mean like a present? Is it christmas already?)**

**S7: 1473I2**

**T117: Sayonara. **


	31. Layla Wasn't Written About You

**Tali:**

Tali followed Shepard up the ramp and back to the Mako. She was trying to replicate Shepard's stance on the way, standing straight and proud rather than her usual withdrawn huddle. It was safe to say she was doing it right until the doors to the Mako opened and Ty flew out followed by Bourne.

The user landed rather embarrassingly on his ass while the biotic was able to control his fall and land on his feet. "Damn, I've heard of crazy exs, but I think this chick takes the cake."

Ty stood up next to Bourne and gave him a punch to the shoulder. "You shouldn't have told her she looked like a farm cow. All she said was have you ever seen one."

"Clearly, you both misheard me. What I said was- argh, forget it. How do we get out of this mess with our heads still attached?"

A woman stepped out of back of the Mako looking more confident and threatening than Shepard did. "Oh, boys", she sung, "you forgot your toys."

With that, all of Bourne's knives flew out of the Mako and forced Ty to dive for cover. Bourne put up a barrier that deflected most of them, and managed to dodge the few that made it through. "You better not have dented those things lady!"

Tali was drawn out of her viewing as Shepard grabbed her and forced her to run to cover near Ty and Bourne. "Who the hell is that?"

Ty looked at Shepard and facepalmed. "Oh, Cecelia, sorry. This is Layla. Layla, this is Cecelia!"

"I know who she is!" There was a pause and then Shepard was surrounded in the gold aura that Ty had when he got rid of Iron. Within a millisecond, Cecelia flew up into the air faster than Tali could track and slammed into the ceiling.

"Wow, jealous much?" Bourne commented. He then had to dive out of the way as Ty's glaive flew out of the Mako towards him. "Guess that answers that question."

Tali looked over at Ty but he was already up and standing to face Layla. "Layla, stop this. You're not getting anywhere by killing them."

The woman stepped down from the Mako but immediately lifted off the ground and floated over to Ty. "I am getting somewhere. I'm releasing my anger, you told me to do that through video games remember?"

"You know, you said you were god, but it sounds more like you're the other half to me," Bourne said, voice filled with scorn.

There was a momentary pause before Ty put his hand to the ground and shouted, "Data purge." A red fire shot from his hand and lifted him into the air above Layla. From there he lunged forward and tackled her to the ground.

"Oh, so you want to go back to here do you?" She said in the most sultry voice she could.

Ty paused at that long enough for her to thrust up and knock him off her. She was up first and stood still pointing her hand at Ty. He got up after her in a kneeling position and had his hand pointed at her.

"I'm surprised you learned how to data purge so late. It was one of the first things I learned when I came in. Then again, you always had trouble blowing your load didn't you?"

"How would you know?" Bourne yelled from the sidelines, glowing blue, clearly hoping for an opening of some sort.

"Data purge." The shot flew at her but she deflected it quickly.

"Oh, you still don't remember, do you Ty? Did Bourne know how much of a terrible drunk you were before I came into your life? How I gave you the drive that carries you forward?"

Ty's hands dropped to the ground and Layla landed right up close to him.

"Truth be told, you probably are holding back. Somewhere in your mind you know you want me back."

Ty seemed to whisper something but it was inaudible to her.

"Excuse me?"

Ty looked up at her. "l said, format strike!" At that he brought his hand up and pressed it into her gut. She began to dissipate the same way Iron did and began cursing.

"You bastard, I'm going to castrate you with your own fuckingagpojgpokag-" and she was gone like Iron.

"You know, might be a good idea to just lead with that next time." Bourne said, walking over to help Ty up.

Ty opened his mouth to say something but his eyes shot up and he sprinted over to where Tali was and put his arms out. Quickly, a dazed Shepard landed in them and he sat her down standing up.

Ty looked over at Bourne and held up two fingers. "One, format strike has a recharge time on it and didn't finish until the second I said it. Two, do you think today is worse than yesterday?"

"I fail to see how this, Saren's visit, being beaten by Shepard to within an inch of your life, meeting up with Cerberus, and getting thrown from an elevator compares to anything that happened yesterday."

Ty let himself fall back onto his ass. "Yeah, it was a joke. Man, we've got a hundred and one problems but where to find our enemies just ain't one of them."

Tali shook her head. "I wish finding suit filters wasn't one of them."

"I wish trying to keep you pyjaks from killing us wasn't one of them." As Wrex said it he gestured to Ty and Bourne.

"I wish trust wasn't one of them", Garrus threw in.

"I wish laziness wasn't one of them. Everyone back in the Mako." It was obvious that Shepard was back on her feet and taking charge without taking a misstep. For that Tali just admired her more.

" I wish having to retrieve a few dozen knives wasn't one of them." Bourne replied. "Give me a minute or two. That bitch scattered them all over the place and probably busted half of them."

Tali looked to the Mako but something in her gut told her to help Bourne grab his knives. She noticed something shining on the ground, and walked over to look. Careful not to cut open her suit, she lifted it up so she could see it. "I think I found your shoulder knife."

Bourne raised his hand for her to throw it to him, and kept looking for his other knives, muttering to himself. "Busted, dent, dulled- still useable though, boot knife, these look in good shape...Oh for crying out loud!" Tali followed his line of sight to the wall he'd been standing in front of. Looking down at the ground beneath it, she saw at least a couple dozen knives there, bent hopelessly out of shape.

The biotic did a quick count of how many knives he still had and swore. "A dozen. Only a dozen. That doesn't even fill up one arm!" He angrily stored them on his belt instead, and looked pointedly at Ty. "While I don't rationally blame you in the slightest for the angry ex, I apologize in advance for any _irrational _anger I direct your way."

Ty put his hand out and the glaive flew into it. "If you want, you can borrow this… but the tomahawk is off limits."

"Nowhere to put it or I might." He looked down at his now bare arms. "But...you think that a certain project named after a mythical firebird might be something you can replicate?"

Ty opened his mouth to say something but closed it and began thinking about Bourne's question. In the end, he just shrugged and said, "Is the whip armor or weapon."

"I think it's more of a focusing tool for the biotics." He answered with a shrug. "Might be worth a shot. Especially for close quarters with lots of enemies." He raised an eyebrow pointedly, clearly trying to tell him something.

Or maybe telling him something across the mental link they apparently shared. Tali hadn't actually been all that surprised by the revelation for some reason; it was like the human expression, Deja Vu.

Although, the fact that they had a way to speak without her hearing ate away at her for some reason. She was used to hearing gossip and what's what through other people. To be out of the know just didn't feel right to her. In fact, she was so focused on it that she didn't remember getting in the Mako and Shepard driving off but she finally let it go when everyone began talking again.

"So, quick question Bourne, Layla on a scale of one to ten?" Ty asked.

"Negative 3." Shepard spat irritably.

Bourne chuckled slightly. "I don't know that I'd go that far. I'd say she was at least a negative 2.998."

"Ha, ain't that the truth." Ty agreed.

"Ty, if you don't mind me asking. How did you meet that bitch?"

Bourne chuckled. "I believe her exact words describing it were-"

"Bourne, if I wanted your take on it, I'd have asked you. I asked him."

Ty let his head fall down and he began to sulk. "Yes, I do mind you asking."

"Yeah, I wasn't actually going to say anything. I was more just seeing how he'd react if he thought I was." Bourne commented.

"I would have preferred you saying something Bourne."

He laughed. "Yeah, like I'm going to explain to your new flame how you met your ex. That's for you to deal with. Probably after a lot of booze."

"It's gonna take about a keig before I start talking about her."

The biotic gave him a pointed look. "If you can make something so alcoholic it affects the guy with a liver designed to not let him get drunk, I think you can get yourself shitfaced with pretty much any amount."

"But can I get up the next day?" Ty looked up smiling again as if he was never sad.

"Uh, magic hangover cure."

Ty sat forward and gestured to Boure. "Yes, but for a hangover that could kill a giant?"

"I didn't say give yourself alcohol poisoning! I said you could get yourself more drunk with less."

"Bourne, you realize that I just make your drinks like seventy-five proof?"

"So you turn your own drinks into something strong too. I don't see the problem. I'm sure Drew could do the math and figure out how many drinks you wanted it spread out across."

"Bourne, that will literally kill me. You can drink more because your liver can filter it better. Mine is normal, therefore, I need to drink more."

"It sounds like you just want to do a keg stand."

Ty snapped and pointed at him. "Yes!"

Tali looked between them, wondering what a keg stand was. "Uh, what's that?"

"It's where you hold someone upside down and have them drink from a big barrel of alcohol."

Bourne chuckled. "Bet I could do some sort of reverse deal where I held it over myself instead."

Ty gestured to her. "We will start with Tali."

Bourne gave him a pointed look.

"Uh, do I have to?"

"Not if you don't want to." Bourne said, his look turning into a glare.

"Uh, Bourne, shouldn't you be, I don't know, focusing on the Geth shooting at us?!" Garrus broke in.

He swiveled back in his chair, hands moving smoothly over the controls. "Yeah, turns out running them over tends to work just as well as a gun." There was a sudden bump that seemed to back up his point.

**Bourne:**

I sent a rocket at a Geth that escaped the giant tires. _)And should she decline and you try to get her to anyway…(_

"Just pay attention." Garrus said, irritated.

_)And was he this big of a dick back in your world, or is he only like this when I'm around?(_

_ ^Nah, he was pretty laid back in mine… for Garrus.^_

_ )I can understand my version, but this guy's just an ass.(_

_ ^I think it's just to you… Hey, did you notice that Tali was kind of glaring when we did this earlier?^_

_ )I suspected at least. The helmet always makes it a little hard to tell, but the body language seemed to fit. Why?(_

_ ^We should interchange talking in link and out loud too.^_

_ )Whatever.(_

_ ^God, you have no fun.^_

_ )Does poker count? Because if it does, than your argument is invalid…also, I killed all sorts of things today, so that definitely counts.(_

_ ^That's psychotic fun. Doesn't count as normal.^_

_ )Considering the crap I've been through, I'll take whatever 'fun' I can get.(_

_ ^No, you take whatever fun Iron would have.^_

I glanced at him over my shoulder. _)There's a difference between enjoying the rush of combat and actively looking for people to kill. Also, I kill quickly and cleanly, he goes for slow and painful.(_

_ ^You still enjoy it… You enjoy killing. That's demented man.^_

_ )As I said- mildly sociopathic. If I felt guilty about killing thugs and mercs, I'd have broken down day one. I figure if I'm going to have to do it anyway…(_

_ ^Dude, you need to see a psychiatrist.^_

_ )Yeah, you have very little room to talk. And even if I take a bit of satisfaction in it, at least I don't, quote "get off on it" unquote.(_

_ ^I don't believe that, the way you talk about it you do get a sexual thrill from killing.^_

_ )...No. No I do not.(_

"A hundred meters to target." Shepard broke in.

_)Wouldn't Arnold have picked up on that if it was true? I mean, that would have been pretty obvious, even for him.(_

_ ^Maybe, he did. Maybe he even kept it from you because he thought you already knew it deep down.^_

_ )Yeah, Bullshit. He said he sent a backup to Drew at one point, see if Drew can access it.(_

_ ^How would that solve anything? You would only believe me if I said 'no, you don't.'^_

I shook my head, annoyed. _)Ty, I've got a perfect memory, remember? I can correlate every thought I've had to when I've had it. And after killing someone, boning is usually the farthest thing from my mind.(_

_ ^Have you ever thought that you focus on killing so much that you don't notice it?^_

_ )...let me put it this way. When 'you' asked Cecelia if she was serious about that, she said it only happened with people she really hated. And I think she's a little bit more into killing than me, so it's pretty unlikely. Admittedly it's possible, but around here, what isn't at least a little possible?(_

_ ^A male producing milk through his lactation glands… or maybe it is. Hang on, come here Bourne.^_

_ )If you do that, then we're also testing to see if a User can regrow his genetilia after they're cut off.(_

_ ^At least babies won't be sucking at my chest.^_

_ )Or I can test out the new lashes you gave me.(_

_ ^Uh, you are a bit ahead of yourself. I haven't done that yet… and now, I might not want to. I wonder if Hero would like them though?^_

I looked down at my arms. The slots for the knives had been smoothed over, and there were various electrical ports. _)So, what, you just removed the knife functionality? And considering that I can close with an enemy a lot easier than she can...half the reason I was asking is that they'd seriously come in handy against those creepers.(_

_ ^I need another set of armor to work on the whips. Turns out that I only have so much I can do with a gauntlet. Wait, where is my pneumatic gauntlet?^_

_ )I only perfectly remember things I actually see…. I guess if we find a set of armor in there, you can use it for that. Seems kinda odd though. It seems like only the gauntlets were important, so why wouldn't you be able to just change those?(_

_ ^I modified them as far as I could. I can only do so much with what I was given.^_

_ )Yeah, I get that. It's just an odd limitation is all. Must have to do with the amount of tech or something.( _I shrugged as I followed the others out of the tank. _)If charge and nova tear apart husks, I think they'll work on Creepers plenty well too.( _A thought hit me. _)But, you know...less style points that way.(_

_ ^True, very very true. Hey, why does Wrex have my gauntlet?^_

I looked at the Krogan in surprise, and saw he was right. _)I don't know. Ask him. But, you can literally make another out of a rock on the ground.(_

_ ^I know, but this explains why I couldn't find it to use on Layla. That rhino brained sonofabitch.^_

_ )Maybe Cecelia gave it to him...and are you saying I could actually have tossed her through a wall or three?(_

_ ^If you could lay a finger on her then, yeah.^_

_ )I knew I should have charged her while she was distracted with you! But considering Saren threw me around like a ragdoll, I didn't think it'd actually work.(_

_ ^Might not have. We will never know.^_

_ )Unless she shows up again. And since what you did didn't kill her…And she especially hates Cecelia right now…Any chance that girl at your feet in the vision might have been her?(_

_ ^No idea, but you know what I just thought of. Another person you remind me of.^_

_ )Sigh. Who?(_

_ ^Riddick! Except I'm pretty sure you can't turn a lesbian straight.^_

_ )...Why the hell would I want to?(_

_ ^Get your hands on some bonetown in Raptor City as you would put it.^_

_ )There is no way in hell I'd ever put it like that. And she's my friend, so why the fuck would I mess that up by trying? Not to mention I have to work with her, and that'd be all kinds of weird. Even for us.(_

_ ^So did Riddick, and he never courted her or anything. He just was himself and she finally loved a man.^_

_ )Yeah, except that was a work of fiction, and this is real life...or close enough to it anyway.(_

_^Not really, this is a universe where stereotypes are true and the hero usually gets what he wants. Granted he has to work for it but still.^_

_)...yeah, well there's another problem. The whole "being myself" thing has so far only gotten her to punch me. And slap me. And kick me. And threaten to demote me.(_

_^Yet, she hasn't. Cecelia has done way worse to me but is still into me. Like, in her heart, right next to all the pictures of Liara's ass, there is one photo of you that she is scared to go near.^_

_)...You are the second worst person I've ever met at giving relationship advice.( _I commented as we dropped into the lower level.

Ty didn't reply and instead began whistling the tune for Angel in the Centerfold as a Varen jumped to attack him. Without missing a beat, he swung his tomahawk and caught it in the head, dropping it to the ground.

Another one went after me, but I just grabbed it by a leg and tossed it against a wall. It slumped to the ground and didn't get back up.

Shepard already had her pistol out and dropped the remaining four Varen with one shot each. "Alright, come out."

Lizbeth peaked out from around a corner, and I wondered how Shepard had noticed her. _Well, at least she didn't shoot me this time._

"Why were you watching us?"

"Let's see, heavily armed group of people who look like mercs come busting in with guns. Yeah, hard to imagine why someone would be wary of folks like that." I replied, walking over, hand on my Assassin.

Ty was still whistling his tune in the background while he searched through some wrecked crates. _^Might have found what I can use for your whips.^_

_ )Nice. I was half worried she'd find some crap armor and turn it into omni-gel before you could use it.(_

_ ^Though, now that I think about it I might have to rearrange some of your tech into a connector from your amp to the whips. That will hurt.^_

_ ) I doubt I haven't had worse. Think you could hook it into Iron and Hero's amps? The moron restored those with the reality warping.(_

_ ^Possibly, I will need to plug them into plugins that will go in your arms.^_

I tapped Shepard on the shoulder. "Ty and I are going to check out the area over there."

She waved me off distractedly as she listened to Lizbeth. I was mostly trying to tune her out, not wanting two memories of the same conversation.

I walked over to the User, and he held up the set of black and grey armor. _)Alright, let's see if this works.(_

He clutched the armor close. "You might want to close your eyes."

_)I got hit with a beacon and kept my eyes open, I doubt...yeah, screw it, I'll just take your word on this one.(_

There was a sudden pain in my chest and it continued until it was focused on my arms. Matrix code flared on my hands It crept its way up my wrists and to the back of my skull where it just sat and continued. Then, all at once, it stopped.

_^All done.^_

I glanced down at my arms, which had gone from cameo to pure black. They looked bulkier too, but didn't seem to be any heavier or lighter. _)Okay, so where's something to test it on?(_

For once, my answer came quickly as a Varren jumped out at me from the side. I swung my arm on instinct, and it was batted aside by the biotic whip that came out of my hand. I looked at the corpse, and swung the whip experimentally a few times. _)Huh. That was easier than I thought it'd be.(_

There was a sudden thrashing feeling in my chest but it died quickly. _^Uh, I'm stuck.^_

_ )What do you mean you're...you know, you could have mentioned you'd be doing that!(_

_ ^I didn't think I would be stuck. Try doing what you did before to get me out.^_

I thought for a moment. _)Alright, give me a second.( _I closed my eyes, and focused on the sight of him in front of me, as he had been before. When I opened them though, nothing had happened.

_^Hang on, something is happen.. uh oh.^ T_he portal opened in my chest and Ty fired out and slammed into the opposite wall.

_)You alright?(_

"Yeah, it's Wednesday, right?"

"Why?"

"Because I feel like I got knocked into next week."

I rolled my eyes. "Cecelia slammed you a lot harder than that."

"No, she didn't." He gestured upwards, and I saw there was a crack that went up the wall that hadn't been there before.

"Yeah, looks about the same. And I would know."

"Well, I was too busy taking the Ferrari for a spin to realize it."

"I think I'm more like a swat vehicle than Ferrari."

He shook his head. "Swat vehicles don't travel fast like a bullet train."

I shook my head and turned back to where we'd come from, right as another Varren leapt at my face, too close to dodge or fight back. I still found myself leaning back, and activating my biotics. I was suddenly a good ten feet away from where I'd been in a crouch, and it landed ungracefully on the ground, head first. It swayed a moment before falling, eyes glossing over.

I stared for a moment before chuckling. "Well, I guess that's one way to figure out the teleporting thing. Nothing like the threat of having your face torn up even worse to motivate a person."

I looked back at Ty as he hit another Varen with an overload from his tomahawk.

"Geez, how many of those fucking things are in here?"

"Well, hopefully that was the last one. By the way, what did you do with that Krogan's machete?"

"It was a knife, not a machete. And...huh. Guess I never grabbed it out of the shuttle. It's probably still in there, unless someone moved it."

"Well, since your time to claim it passed, dibs."

"Since when is there a time limit?"

He stood up and brushed himself off. "Since you didn't grab it and it has been in there for like three days."

"Excuse me for being more worried about my friend that had just been stabbed than a stupid souvenir."

"So, we are friends."

I gave him an irritated look. "If I didn't at least subconsciously consider you one, I'd have thrown you out of an elevator a lot sooner than I did." I shrugged. "Guess at this point, we are."

"Sorry, the last guy I called a friend tossed me out of his ship when he probably needed me the most. So, I don't call someone my friend until they call me it first."

"Danny tossed you off his ship?" I teased. "That's a story I want to hear."

"Haha, very funny jackass." I looked behind me and saw Danny sitting on a pile of rubble with a pizza on his lap. "I was going to share this with you but now you can fuck off. Want a piece Ty?"

_I was wondering when I'd get to try Lash out. _I snapped my wrist back and a piece flew into my face. I wiped it off with a curse. "Well, that's one I need to practice."

I looked at Ty and saw he had grabbed a piece. Without a second to spare, he stuck his tongue out and licked the entire slice. "Oh, god, I missed this. How did you code it?"

"Dude, they sell it on the Citadel, it's just really expensive." I pointed out. "Hell, Vega could order one."

Danny waved us off. "Easy, I just called a pizza place and had the guy deliver it to Bourne's house."

"What house?"

"I meant in the real world, left instructions telling him to press it to your xbox's start button and bam, here it is. Straight from Dominos."

I closed my eyes. "If you value your life, that is all you will say about the real world as it relates to me." My eyes snapped open, glowing with barely controlled anger. "Otherwise, DM or not, I will not be able to stop myself from seriously fucking you up biotically." My tone left no question that I meant it.

Danny shrugged and finished off his first slice. "Dude, I couldn't have him go to Ty's house. The door is locked and we have a keg along with a six-pack of coke and funions sitting out for the guy to steal."

"Right. Because I care more about easily replaceable food than the fact that I'm trying not to find out anything about my past life." I said sarcastically. "Are you just here to share Pizza with Ty, or is there something important you need to tell us? Cause if it's the former, I'm going to see if I can teleport and catch up with Shepard and leave you two to your juvenility."

Danny turned the box around and held it out to me. "Jeez man, she is still talking to the exogeni chick. Take a chill pill, actually, take the whole bottle."

"Yeah, Ty said the same a while ago."

"Well, he was right. Now, eat a slice and I will get down to brass tax. Just thought I would do a nice gesture since you had to deal with Saren, Blade, Layla, and Iron within the same hour."

I grit my teeth. "While I appreciate your intentions, I would appreciate it more if you just spat it out. As you pointed out, I've already dealt with enough bullshit today."

"Well, needless to say I figured out a way to keep them away from Feros for the rest of the mission. And so you can rest a little easier, I've stopped them from getting on the Normandy for the next couple days. Oh, and talked the consort into giving you a few more upgrades."

I raised an eyebrow. "Such as…?"

He held up a finger and finished his second slice. "I don't know, she wouldn't let me pick, she just said she will have some ready."

I leaned against the wall, considering what they might be. "You know, if Iron got the invincibility turned off, I wouldn't mind tangling with him."

Danny gestured to the pizza box again. "You want a slice or not?"

I pulled this slice to me in a more controlled fashion than before, and took a large bite.

"There, is it so bad to enjoy the real life a little?"

I glared at him. "Let me put it this way- amnesia has its advantages, which I have no intention of giving up."

"Not saying you have to give it up. Just saying that enjoying where you came from can have its benefits."

"Yeah, because a pizza I could have just as easily gotten on the citadel would have been so much hassle." I said with an eyeroll. "Hell, the hardest part would be getting the cash to...pay...for…" I tossed the pizza to the side, holding it midair, and brought up my Omni-tool. "Oh Iron, for once I _don't _completely hate you." I wasn't as rich as Ty by any means, but I could at least match Hero or Raptor now. "Thank you paycheck from a job in another world."

Ty grabbed another piece and I noticed that he had eaten four already. "Cool, you have money now."

"You know, I'm the biotic here." I commented as I grabbed another piece and stacked it atop the first one before taking a large bite out of both. "I actually need the extra calories."

Ty shrugged. "I can do that too." He grabbed the last slice and stacked it on the one he was eating as well. "Plus, I'm just plain hungry."

I shook my head. "Alright, so here's a question- how come when the Doc warned us that Iron was out here, she neglected to mention Layla?...or is that because Ty told her exactly where he was, which she had no prior knowledge of?"

"No idea, she should have been stuck in our universe. It's not like you can just call a cab and come here. Even if you are called. On top of that, she didn't show up to Ty until-"

"Could it be something to do with the corruption?" I cut him off, looking at Ty.

Ty rubbed the zero and shrugged. "No idea. Maybe we should be getting back to Shepard though."

Her voice was suddenly in both our ears. "Where the hell are you?"

"That's my cue to leave." Danny commented, walking over to a wall and opening a glitch portal.

I nodded as I raised my hand to my ear to reply. "Ty thought he saw something over here- turned out to be a bunch of Varen. On the plus side, he finished the armor upgrades I asked him about, and they are very effective."

"Long as you didn't do it for a slice of pizza."

I grabbed a knife and held it up so I could see my face. _)Yeah, we're going to need to clean ourselves up a little bit.( _I glanced over at him. _)You more so than me.( _I joked.

He wiped what little grease he had off with his hand and pointed to me. _^You are the one that will have more zits than a middle schooler unless you get cleaned off.^_

_ )Huh. I don't know that I can actually get zits. With the genemods and all…Is it weird that I half want to find out?( _"We'll be back in a sec." I responded to Shepard. _)But since there's nothing good to clean it off with, and it'll be evident in a second that I managed to bitch slap myself with italian cuisine-( _I dropped down next to one of the dead Varren and pulled out my shoulder knife. _)Little bit of blood ought to make it less obvious.( _I sliced the tail off with a quick motion, and held it above my face, swinging it slightly, so it looked more natural.

Ty shook his head. "That is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen."

"You should have seen the time I facepalmed after punching clean through a guy. That was bad."

"You know, for a so called super soldier, you are an idiot."

"Takes one to know one."

"Except an idiot wouldn't know that someone else is an idiot. Ever seen Dumb and Dumber?"

I rolled my eyes. "Let me put it this way- would you rather admit you got bitch slapped by a slice of peperoni, or lie and say you speared a varren with very bad timing?"

"How about you just use the things skin like a napkin instead? That's less disgusting."

"Somehow, Varren scales seem more likely to scratch my face up than absorb grease. And I'm scarred up enough there."

"Do they have scales? I always thought they were mammals."

"They could be mammals with scales for all I know; I'm not exactly a xenobiologist. And are you going to open a portal back to Shepard or am I teleporting there?"

Ty pointed around us. "No glitches. We are going to have to walk."

"That works too." I glanced over at the wall Danny had disappeared into. "So did he just make a glitch to get out of here then?"

Ty just shrugged and walked off to meet Cecelia.

"And for crying out loud, why can we not walk next to each other instead of one us having to be in front?"

"Because you take too long."

I glanced at the spot just ahead of him, and did a sort of cartwheel in that direction. A moment later, I was the one in front. "And you go too slowly."

He didn't reply but instead started whistling again.

I shook my head, but slowed down so he could catch up and walk next to me. It wasn't long before we caught up to Cecelia and headed deeper into the facility, passing plenty of Geth Corpses along the way.

"Alright, we have to get that Geth ship off the side off the building if we want to get comms back up." She said without looking back at us. "You think you could destroy one of those arms that are holding it in Bourne?"

I considered it for a moment. "Even if I could, they looked thick enough that it'd take a while before anything even happened."

Cecelia pulled a grenade out of her belt and tossed it back to me. "We got explosives Bourne. And with my new mod they should do the trick."

"Should being the key word."

Wrex turned around to face me. "They will do the trick. And if they don't, I can always hit them with this." He gestured to his hand, but it wasn't sporting the gauntlet any more. Ty then stepped around from behind him, holding a familiar rock in his hand._ )Heh, Nice.(_

_ ^Thanks, that'll teach him not to mess with me.^_

"Wrex, what the hell happened to the glove I gave you?" Cecelia asked, noticing it was gone.

Ty tossed the rock away and shrugged with a devious smile on his face. "Must have devolved."

She turned to glare at him. "And I'm sure that you're completely innocent."

_)Pretty sure that was sarcasm. And you've already been slammed into enough walls for one day.(_

He shrugged and pulled the pistol off his side. "Are we really blaming me for losing the toy?"

She glared at him a moment more before turning to me. "You said you got a chance to test his upgrades?"

I nodded.

"Then you'll take point. My radar is showing all sorts of hostile activity ahead."

"Well, into the fray." Ty commented.

I moved past the others quickly but quietly, and saw ahead the console we could use to cut the cable- along with a few dozen Geth, including a couple of primes. _)I swear, any more Primes and they're going to turn into Autobots.( _

_ ^Transformers joke, nice.^ _

_ )So, which would be cooler do you think? Charging in with a Nova or Teleporting in and letting lose with the lashes?(_

_ ^Why not charge into one of those lash smashes?^_

I flicked my wrists, and the lashes appeared with surprisingly little effort. _)That'll work.(_

I sprinted at the nearest prime, and as it turned to face me, I charged, hard enough to knock it to the ground. Its twin raised its gun, only for me to slap it out of its hands with one of the whips, and slam it into the wall with the other.

The smaller units raised their guns, including one with a rocket launcher. I pulled the weapon to me with my biotics and blew the trooper away, along with a pair of its friends. The Prime I'd knocked down started to get back up, and I spread my arms as the rest opened fire, Biotic Sphere not only stopping their fire, but setting up the Prime for a detonation that I triggered with a Nova. It tried crawling away, so I brought my foot up, and brought it down on its head, crushing it with a biotic stomp.

The others moved up and started tearing through the troopers, so I turned back to the Prime as it pulled itself out of the wall.

_Shove a singularity into it and detonate it? Nah, that'd be too easy. Biotic bitchslap to death? Also too easy. _I powered down the whips and pulled my shotgun from my hip instead. _That ought to be just challenging enough. _It raised its own shotgun, but I just yanked it from its hands and opened fire. It tried rushing me as its shields failed, but I just flipped in the air and ended up behind it, turning smoothly to shoot it in the back, overheating the gun. I stored it again and walked over to the Prime as it fell onto its knees. It looked up just in time to see my Lash coming down, smashing its head clean off and into the floor.

There was one final shot from Cecelia's sniper rifle, and then silence.

"So, still think it'll take you a while to tear through that thing?" Garrus commented.

"They are whips Garrus, not swords." Cecelia replied.

"Yeah, and this stuff looks a little tougher than the Prime's armor." I agreed, already moving to the airlock control panel.

"We could use the airlock doors to slice them off." Ty pointed it out and had a devilish grin on his face. "Or we can use the things on the back of Garrus's head as a pry bar and pull them off."

"Or we could use your skull as a hammer. It's certainly thick enough." The turian replied.

"Quiet you two, Bourne hit the switch... You do know how to work that right?"

I gave her an insulted look. "Yeah, I got this." _Or rather Tali has this, but I remember exactly what she hit when I was here before. _My hands flew over the controls, and I confidently hit the button. It took me a moment to realize nothing was happening. I frowned, and tried again- with the same lack of results.

_)Christ, is there anything someone other than Shepard can do?(_

_ ^I can do anything with tech.^_

_ )Then can you tell me if there's something I'm not doing right? And before you get smart, I mean in regards to this panel and that claw.(_

Ty walked up and did something I didn't see, but when he stepped back, there was a big red button show up on the console. "There you go."

I hit it, and the door slid shut, slicing cleanly through the claw. "That seems to have done the trick."

"Aye."

I looked back at Cecelia, who now had her hand raised to her ear. "That you Joker?"

I patched myself into the link as well. "-colonists are going crazy here. They're banging on the airlock doors, trying to get in."

"Well, did they bring their own beer?"

Pretty much everyone turned to glare at Ty for that, but for once I wasn't among them. Instead, I looked at Cecelia. _)Ty, something just hit me.(_

_ ^Was it a sack of shit? Cause I didn't see any rocks fall off the ceiling."_

_ )She's a renegade. We're heading back to the colony...please make the connection on your own for once.( _

_ ^She… will… kill all the colonists.^_

_ )Yeah. And there's a chance I might be able to change her mind, but it's a slim one.(_

Ty looked at me and shook his head._ ^You got to let her do this her way. She is Shepard. If she chooses too then it's up to her.^_

_ )Somehow, I'm not so sure it's her doing the choosing around here.( _I grimaced. _)And if she orders me to gun them down...I'm not sure that's a line even I can cross.(_

_ ^Why? You love killing after all.^_

_ )In a **fight**. Gunning down a bunch of mind controlled civilians? Not a chance I'd enjoy it for a nanosecond. Assuming I managed to go through with it at all.(_

_ ^Bourne, one of the things that you have the benefit of is biotics. Just use throw and lift; that way you can knock them out.^_

_ )Unless she gets to them first.( _I shook my head, realizing the others were already leaving. _)We can worry about it when we get back to Jeong and Juliana. Until then, let's just make sure the Geth don't gun us down.(_

_ ^Ever played Jak and Daxter?^_

_ )What does that have to with possibly having to exterminate a colony?( _Before he could reply, my omni-tool popped up with a message from one "Hannah Swan."

It was very brief. **You know what you have to do.**

_Yeah, I wish. If I disobey her orders, she might just throw me off the ship…and one colony can't compare to the literally billions of people the Reapers could kill._

_ But gunning down people with no more control of their bodies than I did when Iron took over?...I don't know. _

_ ^Nah nah nahnahnahnah nahnahnahnah nahnahnahnahnah, Does she talk, does she walk, does she even move at all? My angel in the Centerfold.^_

I sent a brief burst of nails on a chalkboard his way before blocking out the link. _And I don't have all that long to figure it out._

_ ^Dude, what's your problem?^_

I slammed down harder on the link this time, clenching my hands into fists. _And he doesn't even seem to care. Hell, Tali might be the only other person here who would._

I was pulled from my thoughts as I realized that Ty was whistling the damn tune again. I actually considered putting him stasis for a moment before managing to tune him out of my physical ears as well as mental.

Shepard was not as good at tuning it out. "Goddamnit Ty. Can you stop whistling that tune!? It's the most annoying thing in the world!"

Ty smiled and stopped only to say. "Sure I can, but you owe me one favor that I can redeem at any time."

Cecelia looked at him with rage in her eyes that was being seriously intensified. "Why would I agree to that!?"

"Because, even if you break every bone in my body and puncture one of my lungs. I can still keep whistling it."

"You need lips to whistle." I said, hand wrapping around the knife on my belt. "I think cutting those off might solve the problem."

_^Dude, I am like twenty-one steps ahead of you. Try to keep up.^_

I teleported in front of him and glared. _)Right now is not a good time to piss me off.(_

_ ^Bourne, one favor that I can redeem at any time. Now you put two and two together.^_

_ )I can guess. And the fact that you're being so irritating just so you can get her to...Wait, a minute… Oh for god's sake, you really think she's going to not slaughter them just as a favor to you?(_

_ ^Well, if you don't think it will work I can always save it and force her to dance with me.^_

Cecelia's fist slammed into the wall and the crack ran up to the ceiling. "Fine, but only one."

_)I guess it's at least worth a try. And I can think of a few arguments that might convince her.(_

_ ^And you think she would listen to you why?^_

_ )I was less going to try convincing her, more go along the lines of "What, can you not throw a grenade accurately enough to hit them?" It might insult her pride enough to cause her to try proving me wrong…or to throw one at my head.(_

_ ^She would throw the grenade at you with that comment.^_

_ )...you know, one other idea occurs to me. Didn't you say something to threaten Iron about turning him into a paragon?(_

_ ^I'm not changing her.^_

_ )You could change her back after they're knocked out...except then she would murder you. Hmm, maybe a little memory loss then? Or we could just knock them out and go ahead of them, secure the area and wait for them. Say it was the Geth that did it.(_

_ ^Let's decide when we get there.^_

I grimly nodded agreement.

**~Alright, today it's just Hero and I to talk and answer questions.~**

**(Says who**Crazey metal has been logged off by host.

***That answers that question.***

You are welcome.

**~Okay, so what are we going to talk about since we are technically supporting characters?~**

***Yeah, that's a good point- though I'm not sure how much even that much can apply to me cause I didn't show up till like chapter 50 in SiaWoF. You've already shown up in 8 of Prime. Regardless…***

**~Well, do you like Captain America?~**

***Uh, duh...Though T117 hasn't had a chance to see the new one yet, so neither have I as a consequence... Which really sucks, cause there's a ton of other good movies he's never seen.***

**~Yeah, Spike is a serious movie buff. He sees them all regardless of whether he is told they are good or not. Wait, we are failing the bechdel test right now.~**

***The sad part is I/T117 only know what that means because of a webcomic.***

**~Okay, so what should we talk about that is not one of the guys in our life or considered 'girly'.~**

***I dunno, favorite class to play as in multiplayer?***

Is it the drell vanguard for you?

***No.***

Drell Adept?

**_*No.*_**

Drell Infiltrator?

***NO! It's the Volus Adept!***

**~I think it still counts as failing the bechdel test by CTHI talking about the species and race and gender of your previous boyfriend.~**

***That's her fault then. I wasn't even going to bring Drell into the conversation. But since she did, we need a new idea.***

**~How about that weather?~**

***I meant a _good _idea.***

**~Okay, um… uh… what is your favorite food?~**

***Uh...I think I'm going to say Lasagna. You?***

**~Well, my favorite is a New York style steak, cooked medium rare with blue cheese melted and drizzled over the steak after a light marination.~**

***Shrug. Fancy stuff is nice, but sometimes simple comfort food is best.***

**~You mean like curling up with a tub of cookie dough ice cream in your robe and watching Star Trek?~**

***I'm more of an cookies and cream with sweatpants gal, but that's the gist of it.***

Your Hulu Plus and Netflix history suggests little Star Trek, but repeated viewings of Arrow and Agents of Shield.

**~Great so she is a fan of shirtless guys on TV.~**

***...Yeah, I was hoping she wouldn't bring that up and break the test, _again.* _**

**~Damn it, CTHI!~**

Apologies, my censorship subroutine was offline. I've rebooted it, so we should be able to avoid that now.

**(Hah! You also let your firewall down so I **Crazey metal has been logged off by host.

**~Okay fine, you start Hero.~**

***I'm thinking...favorite book?***

**~Ripley's believe it or Not.~**

***Oh man, I haven't read one of those in ages.***

**~They are so fun. Seriously, where else can you find out that some guy dragged a semi truck by his nipples?~**

The Internet?

***Yeah, but it's hard to search for something like that, even if you wanted to.***

**~Plus, you can find out about it without feeling like a freak and deleting your internet history.~**

***Oh, the trick is to just use the private browsing mode...I mean, not that I'd know or anything...Anyway, my favorite book is probably actually the Zombie Survival Guide.***

**~Oh that is so overdone. It's like the anarchist cookbook. Just too many people praise it too much for just being a guide.~**

***Ugh, fine. Wheel of Time series then.***

**~... Okay, maybe we aren't that interesting without the story driving our characters.~**

***Well, most of our dialogue and characterisation and whatnot come from bantering with other people.***

**~True, then again. Neither of us have had our stories uploaded/written yet.~**

***What do you mean _our _stories?***

**~Well, Spike is working on my story in Users. It's called Users: Revolution.~**

***...Seriously? You get your own spinoff prequel thing but T117 is only barely thinking about some one shot thing?***

At least you exist outside the Author's Notes Universe.

**~Well, uh, sorry? I don't know what to say here. I have a legitimate story. Later on people will get to know about it a little bit but Spike wants people to hear about what happened to me.~**

***I guess that makes sense. But with me it'd be mostly redundant, since...well, they kinda know the gist of it. At least, I'd assume people reading this have played the games. Maybe a couple oneshots specific to me, and maybe some for Iron. Like "Oneshots in a World of Fiction." But he's kinda unsure if he's going to do that.***

**~With how much Trebor and Spike are copying each other. I would guess you most likely will.~**

***How are they really copying each other? They're both working on the sequels, sure, and Spike is rewriting his story like T117s did, but I think that's about it.***

Some parts or aspects of Surviving a World of Fiction that T117 has run by Spike have been noted to be somewhat similar to things done or that will be done in Users...excellent, my censorship subroutine is fully back online.

**~Similar? More like copying.~**

***That's an argument I'd like to have, but can't because we'd end up spoiling stuff.***

**~That is most likely the case. Anything you want to add before we go?~**

***Yeah, I'd just like to point out Spike admitted SiaWoF was kinda an inspiration for him with Users, so...copying is kinda hard to pin on one or the other. Or we could say they're both equally guilty.***

What do the stories really have in common though, aside from the basic premise of a Self Insert?

***Both of them have powers derived from the last version of Shepard- Iron and I in Bourne's case, and Andrew in Ty's case- both have supernatural powers- reality warping and code manipulation respectively- and both writers are complete nerds.***

**~I would argue Spike more than Trebor.~**

***No, he's one too, he just doesn't show it in the same way. There are a lot of movie quotes in SiaWoF though, and plenty more coming up in SaWoF or UiaWoF.***

**~Ain't that the truth. But I would just like to point out that neither you nor Iron coded your powers and titled them in 1337 like Andrew Shepard did.~**

***Yeah, that's because we're biotics, not tech people/nerds. So it wouldn't make sense for us to be nerds in-story.***

**~Okay, say goodbye to the people, Hero.~**

Goodbye to the people Hero.

**~Okay, 1473I2.~**

***I should go…Sorry, force of habit. Sayonara.***


	32. Burying the Hatchet

**Shepard:**

Shepard stormed down the hall with Garrus and Wrex right behind her. Ty and Bourne on the other hand, were keeping their distance and with good reason. She was so pissed now that she promised Ty a favor. Not to mention finding out that Lizbeth had lied to her about the Thorian. It was apparently the entire reason Saren had come here.

"So, is it just me or are the Geth getting easier to shoot?"

She looked back at Wrex. "I think you might be getting better with your aim."

He laughed. "I've been shooting guns since before you knew what one was."

"So obviously you've had plenty of time to improve."

"And yet you can't hit anything with a sniper rifle." Garrus commented.

"Quiet Turian, or I will gut you with your own fringe."

"I think the claws would be better for slicing." Bourne commented somewhat distractedly. "Trust me on that."

"That why your face looks like a you got in a fight with a lawn mower, Bourne?" Cecelia asked.

"Something like that." He answered with a grimace. "Bastard had all sorts of cybernetics too, made them even sharper."

Shepard turned a corner and saw that Ty was sticking halfway out of a glitch and holding a struggling Geth by the head. "Hey guys."

A bullet flew past Cecelia into its head, and she glanced back to see Bourne storing his gun. "You know, when I do the lone wolf thing, it works. You...maybe a C+?"

Ty rolled his eyes. "Bourne, you should really look before you shoot. I was trying to find out something I have always wondered about the Geth."

"Ty, I really doubt they're MP3 compatible."

"How'd you guess?"

"It seemed like the type of thing _you _would wonder about a murderous synthetic lifeform."

Ty pulled himself back into the Geth and held up a middle finger in Bourne's direction just long enough to make sure he saw it and then yanked it in.

"He doesn't seem too happy with you."

Bourne responded with an annoyed grunt.

Ty came halfway out of a portal down the next hall and pointed down it. "Lizbeth is that way."

"Don't you ever get tired of doing that?" Garrus commented.

Ty crossed his arms and seemed to ponder Garrus's question for a moment. "Yeah, I still walk around the Normandy quite a bit and that is full of places to jump to. It's just safer to portal around in this area ."

"I fail to see how the Geth, Krogan, and Varren make it safer." Tali replied skeptically.

"Yeah, have to go with her on that one." Bourne agreed.

"Bourne, try and shoot at me."

Everyone in the group looked back to see his reaction.

He raised an eyebrow. "You do realize that friend or not, if I aim a gun at you, I'm going to be trying to hit you? In a very painful manner? With explosive rounds?"

"Do it. My shields can handle the blast."

"Your funeral." He said with a shrug. His gun came up too fast for Shepard to follow, and he let loose a pair of shots.

Shepard looked back to Ty and saw that he was gone. There was a loud thwack behind her and then Ty came out of the portal again. "See, you are the one that gets hurt. Especially when you fire two shots that can kill me."

She looked at Bourne, who was glaring at Ty. "I warned you I was going to be trying to hit you. Also, did a fly just land on the back of my head? Because it felt exactly like a fly landed on the back of my head."

"Hey, Bourne, do you remember that question I asked you earlier? Well, more of that thing I said could be impossible but then again might not?"

"I don't know. Do you remember what my response to it was?" He flicked his wrist, and that odd biotic whip thing appeared again.

"I'm just saying that if you really think it was a fly, maybe you should make sure."

The biotic crossed his arm, though he maintained the whip. "Ty, I've been hit by Cecelia, Krogan, Hannah, Cecelia, Raptor, and...oh yeah, you punched me in the face for like 50 stories down. Compared to that, it might as well have been a fly."

Shepard shook her head and began walking. "Ty, scout ahead and see what we are looking at for threats. Bourne, watch our backs incase one of those dead ones decides to be not dead."

"For their sake, they'd better stay dead." He replied, activating the other whip. "Because if they're not, I'll be more than happy to amend that."

Ty sunk back into the wall as they ventured forward and everyone kept close as they moved down the hall. Luckily, there wasn't any attacks from the Geth and Ty never stopped in to report anything. Now, all they had to do was travel to the locked doors they came to and saw a Lizbeth standing next to Ty and cowering.

A moment later, Bourne appeared next to them, with the telltale sound of his biotic teleporting. "So, am I going to have to be good cop here or what? Because I think I might be the only one here who can even pretend to be one."

Ty bowed and moved out of the way. "Be the good cop bourne, embrace it."

He rolled his eyes. "So, I'm guessing there's a reason your girlfriend is glaring at her like that?"

She fought the urge to punch Bourne and walked up to Lizbeth. "You have thirteen seconds before I shoot your head off. What is the Thorian?"

"So we're skipping bad cop altogether and going directly to worse cop." Bourne commented.

The woman began to panic and put her hands up in defense. "It's a plant that exogeni has been studying for years now. It has the ability to control people with spores that it releases into your system."

"Or maybe the term should be effective cop." Bourne said. "I take it you found something snooping around in here?"

Shepard nodded. "She said it was an ingenious life form. She neglected to mention the part about it being able to control minds...or that everyone at Zhu's hope is probably infected." She added that with a glare. "Can you give me a single reason why I shouldn't blow your head off for lying to me?"

"And we've gone past 'cop' altogether now." Bourne said with a shake of his head. He glanced at the woman, then leaned in close to whisper in Shepard's ear. "She probably figured you'd have this exact reaction if she did tell her. Can you really blame her for trying to avoid getting herself killed?"

"I stayed behind to try to send a message to the company, let exo-geni know what they were doing. I couldn't say anything before that, they'd have...terminated my contract. Permanently."

"Shepard, she's been terminated." Ty put his arm around the woman and gave a fake sad face.

Bourne opened his mouth to say something, then closed it and glared at him instead. Cecelia was only a split second later in glaring.

"Do I look amused?" She asked coldly.

"Do you ever have a heart when we go on missions?" Though she couldn't see his face, behind the mask she felt it as his face went stern as he asked it and she saw that he meant what he said.

"While I wouldn't be stupid enough to say that to your face while you had a gun, he's got a point." Bourne said after a moment.

Shepard pulled her gun up and put it right to Ty's head with her finger on the trigger. "Because heart gets in the way."

She felt something press against the side of her head, and saw Bourne's eyes glowing in the corner of the vision. "You want to stop pointing the gun at my friend?" His biotics flared around him, and it was evident it wasn't an idle threat.

There was a moment where nothing happened until Ty's mask opened and he held her gaze. "Bourne, put the gun down. Shepard, shoot if it really gets in the way." The biotic didn't bother responding, keeping his focus- and aim- on her.

She held her gun steady and didn't let it go down but something wouldn't let her shoot him. Part of her was holding her finger back with all it's might yelling at her that she didn't want to do this. In the end, it won and she let her gun arm drop and holster her weapon.

After a moment, Bourne lowered his gun as well, though he kept it in his hand. "Once again Ty, you prove to be either the bravest man alive or the most idiotic."

Ty closed his facemask and his cheery demeanor returned. "The two are often confused and the lines between them are more blurred than watching a movie through a soda bottle."

She ignored that, turning to Bourne. "If you ever point a gun at me again-"

"Yeah yeah, threats, scariness, etcetera." He replied, storing his gun. "I get the gist of it."

Shepard put all her anger into one final punch that landed in Bourne's gut before motioning for everyone to get back in the Mako. She turned to look at Lizbeth. "You're coming with us."

As she walked to the Mako, she suddenly tripped over nothing, but when she looked back at Bourne, he was holding one hand to his stomach, no sign of biotics. "Trip over something Commander?" He asked, and she almost believed it hadn't been him. Almost.

Everyone loaded up and Shepard flipped the Mako around, gunning it across the short distance and right to the exo-geni staff that she met before. The Radio suddenly crackled, and she heard Juliana's voice come across, cut off by Jeong telling her to get away. As soon as she stopped, Lizbeth shot out of the Mako and ran to help her mother.

"That doesn't sound good." Garrus commented.

She thought for a moment. "Wrex, Garrus, you stay in the tank so someone doesn't try stealing it. Tali, Bourne, Ty, you're with me. We're going to find out if these idiots knew about the Thorian too."

She looked pointedly at Bourne. "And since you seem to love being good cop so much-"

"Lady, in comparison to you, there aren't many people who wouldn't be good cop. Besides, someone has to keep this idiot alive." He said, gesturing to Ty.

"You know, I took care of myself just fine before you showed up."

"Yeah, but that was also before you met her."

They all got out and snuck into the hallway, making sure to keep their heads down as they did so. From what Shepard could see, the older woman she talked to last time they were here was in a standoff with the head executive of exo-geni. Just at one glance, she saw that he had a gun and was threatening her at this point.

Before she could give any orders, Lizbeth ran in. "Get away from her you son of a bitch!"

"Well, so much for the element of surprise." Bourne muttered. "Pretty sure I can teleport in and disarm him. Or disable him."

Shepard stood up and whispered into her comm, "Take his gun. If you break his knee in the process then oh, well."

At that moment, Jeong looked over to them. "Damnit! Come out where I can see you- all of-" His words turned into a yelp of pain as Bourne appeared next to him, and yanked his gun to the side, taking his fingers with it and breaking his hand. A quick chop to the side of the head and kick to the back of the knee put him on the ground. The guards raised their weapons, but he yanked them out of their hands and into the air before they could fire. "I know you said knee, but hand was easier." He said with a grim smile as the others walked down.

"Who the hell are-" Jeong's question was cut off as Bourne lifted him one handed by the throat.

"I am a guy who's had a long, stressful day, and would be more than happy to take it out on you if you don't shut the hell up."

Shepard stepped past Bourne and up to the lady from before. "What's going on here?"

She gestured to the man Bourne was holding. "Let him explain it- I'd probably clean it up too much."

At a gesture from Shepard, the biotic dropped him to the ground, and he rubbed at his throat with his good hand. "This oughta be interesting."

"I just got a call from exo-geni headquarters. They said that the current project must continue even if we lost our building. That means everyone here is reinstated and must get back to work."

Bourne kicked him in the side of the head. "Lie to us again and I'll break your other hand- assuming I don't just cut it off."

"Alright, alright, they said they wanted the colony purged! It wasn't my decision! I'm just following orders."

Bourne looked at him for a moment before spitting to the side in disgust.

"So, when does the purge hit?" Shepard gestured to him with her gun. "Or has it yet to be decided how to do it?"

"I was trying to figure that out when she started protesting." He said, covering his head with his hands. "She didn't know about the Thorian, and when I explained it-"

His protests were cut off as Bourne kicked him on his back, and put his foot on his throat. "You showed your true colors." He looked up, ignoring his struggling, and glared at the guards. "Any of you want to try explaining yourselves?"

They backed away from the sheer force of his glare.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." He looked down at the executive again. "You putting the bullet in his head Shepard, or am I?"

Shepard's expression went cold and she put the gun to his head. "I hope they have a special torture in hell picked out just for you." She pulled the trigger and his brains went everywhere. "Okay, let's head back to the colony and deal with this Thorian."

"That may not be so simple." Bourne said, removing his foot from the dead man's throat. "Didn't Joker say all the colonists were going nuts?"

She shrugged. "Well, in my professional opinion, I think they just need three C.C.s of cold lead in their system."

Bourne turned to her, arms crossed, and concealing something in his hands so well she almost missed it. "It sounds like the Thorian is using them to protect itself. They're innocents caught in between." His eyes started burning, and she didn't think he even realized he was doing it. "And lets just say I know what it's like to have someone else tugging on your strings."

"Yeah, don't you have like some knockout gas?"

Lizbeth spoke up quickly. "We used a special gas to make sure we were all 'clean' at the end of the day. Maybe it was to keep us from being infected by Thorian spores."

"Spreading clouds of nerve gas doesn't seem like a particularly good idea." Shepard responded.

"It's weak stuff, but if their minds are already weakened by the creature's control…"

Bourne pointedly pulled his helmet off his back. "And even if it was plain nerve gas, we have suits that can recycle oxygen for more than long enough for us to go down and get some weed killer on that thing."

Shepard wasn't buying into the plan at all. "So, I trust my life and my crews to this gas that could possibly be what we need but you aren't sure? Thanks but no thanks. If they are shooting at me then I'm going to be shooting back."

Bourne's eyes suddenly turned from blue to red. "We have armor with kinetic barriers. They don't. There are, what, maybe 20 people there? I could take out that many in five minutes if you hang back."

"Or, get hit by one of their stray bullets and now we will have a man down. Bourne, it's just not concrete enough for my approval."

"I've been shot at before. And as I said, I have armor and barriers. Not to mention being able to move almost as fast as their bullets, or _teleport_. They'd be lucky if they grazed me, let alone actually wounded me."

"Shepard, I'm gonna have to call in my favor on this one." Ty said as he sat on a box nearby.

Bourne's eyes went back to blue. _"There is no way she's going to go for it." _He muttered just barely loud enough for her to hear.

"Fine, Ty, this is your one favor. Give the mod to me." Shepard held her hand out to the woman more irritated than anything but happy that it wasn't something embarrassing that Ty called his favor in on like she assumed.

Bourne uncrossed his arms, and from the corner of her eye she saw him slide a pair of knives back onto his belt.

"Bourne, I don't understand how you expect me to listen to your opinion when you are ready to stab me in the back if I don't go your way."

He raised an eyebrow. "If I'd wanted to injure you, I would have just used biotics." He smiled grimly. "And that line seems rather hypocritical, coming from you."

There was a smile that came to her lips as Lizbeth handed her the mod but she quickly banished it and turned back to Ty and Bourne. "Alright, lets load up and get back to the colony."

They all began to leave and head back up to the Mako when Ty made sure to walk next to her. "So, ready to see what a giant, mind controlling, plant looks like?"

"My guess- it'll be the one thing uglier than I was with that technocyte crap on me." Bourne replied.

"I have a guess, but I am going to keep that to myself." Ty kept laughing quietly to himself after that.

"I think it will look like any enemy. Sitting out in the open waiting for me to shoot it."

"Sometimes I think half the reason I signed on to this mission is to be around people that made me look slightly more sane." Bourne commented with a sigh.

"That's not possible Bourne." Ty and Cecelia said in unison.

"I said _slightly_."

"Still not possible."

He cleared his throat. "'I swear to god sitting on his throne, I will be the one to kill you if you try anything. Unlike these two, I get off on it.'...Maybe it's a mistake to ask this, but were you serious when you said that?"

"Only to the people I hate Bourne. And it seems like you are trying to squeeze yourself into that category."

"I'm pretty sure you get off on just killing Bourne." Ty said.

"Yeah, he does seem to enjoy it when he does slash someone's throat."

They both suddenly tripped over nothing. "You guys might want to watch your step. There's a lot of loose rocks out here." Bourne said, walking past them as though it wasn't obvious he'd been the one to trip them.

Ty leaned over to Shepard but stopped short and instead typed her a quick message on the his omni-tool and sent it. **When I whacked Bourne in the head, I set his body to biotic charge every time he is punched in the kidney. Do with this information what you will.**

"Ty, while I'll admit it was smart to use the omni-tool messaging so I wouldn't overhear, I can still hear you typing something." Shepard closed the message before Bourne could see it and deactivated her omni-tool.

"So, if you were normal, you could hear me whispering to her but you wouldn't know what it was I was saying."

He paused with one foot in the door of the Mako. "Buddy, if any of us were normal, we wouldn't be here."

"True, then again, normalcy is overrated when you can control the very fabric of the universe… within reason."

"And besides-" he turned around, smiling. "If you do try something...well, let's just say being stealthy and needing almost no sleep can come in very handy when it comes to payback."

Ty walked up to Bourne and laughed. "Dude, you think that your payback is bad. Wait till you see what mine is."

"Is it still payback, if it's as revenge for payback?"

Ty moved his hand down to pat Bourne where his kidneys would be but pulled his hand back. "I don't know, maybe we should just say clean slate here. I mean we have been getting payback on each other from like the moment we got here."

"Yeah. Besides, it'd be pretty hard to top being thrown out an elevator. Not that that's a challenge mind you."

"Are we calling it fresh start or do you want me to pay you back for that?"

"Let's go with the fresh start option." He replied. "Mostly because you're more tolerable than you first appeared, but also because I think you might actually be able to top it."

"Bourne, every single one of the things that I said I didn't know if I could do I was going to try on you. Male lactation, changing your gender, seeing if I could turn you into a dog and then potty train you with programming. Dude, you just saved yourself a whole world of hurt." Ty brought his hand around and held it out to Bourne for a handshake.

"Not that I really want to know, but...screw it, I just plain don't want to know." The biotic clasped Ty's hand in his own. "How about we stop making each other's lives more difficult, and save it for everyone else."

"Okay, good with me. You know what I have always wanted to try on Iron. Programming him with haemophobia. Fear of blood. How much of a mind fuck would that be for him?"

Bourne grimaced distastefully. "He might actually enjoy that, because it'd mean he'd have to figure out how to kill people without spilling any. It'd make it more of a challenge for him."

"What about a straight Heterophobia?"

"...I think he's crazy enough it wouldn't affect him, honestly. He already wants to kill pretty much anyone he sees."

"Then, what about thanatophobia. Fear of death, as in fear of killing people."

"That…miiiiiight work, but who knows with a mind as fucked up as his?"

Shepard pulled up her omni-tool and checked her team's health. It looked like they were all good, Ty was in the middle, Bourne was near full, Wrex was healing on his own, and as long as he stayed back, Garrus would be fine. Still, she did work on her medigel recently and decided it might be a good idea to use it and see how it helped.

Almost immediately, everyone was brought up to full except Garrus who healed to three fourths. "Well, would you look at that."

"Anyone just get a sudden rush of energy?"

Bourne groaned. "I hope not. Last time you got one of those, I felt like crap the whole time...and also, you got stabbed after that, which'd also be bad if it was repeated."

"Relax, I just gave everyone a dose of medigel to keep someone from getting killed Bourne."

"Sometimes it's better to expect the worse. You might end up pleasantly surprised."

Garrus gave Bourne an odd look at that, but didn't comment.

"In my case, expect the best because you sure as hell will get it." Ty walked into the Mako and sat down

"An hour ago, I would have disagreed with that. But being your friend, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt." Bourne replied, taking the guns again.

The conversation ended as Shepard took her seat and blasted down the road ready for what was to come next.

**Ty:**

Shepard took off at an amazing pace but this time gave Bourne enough chances to blow the Geth off the bridge. Soon, all that stood between us and the colony was the Armature from before. Still, Shepard saw an open door under the road and decided that we should check it out.

"Ty, Bourne, Garrus, you're with me. Wrex, take the , make sure Wrex doesn't drive off without the rest of us."

"But the enemy is right there Shepard. I could take them out before you pyjaks can even find what's in there."

Bourne stood up from his seat, and twisted in the air, teleporting outside the Mako. He teleported back in a second later. "Really? Because neither of those primes I just found seem to be taken out."

Wrex looked out the door and then back at Bourne with a glare. "Two primes or two hundred. I have a tank."

Bourne chuckled. "Yeah, no need to feel bad about needing a handicap at your age. Just sit back and let us younger folks handle it."

Wrex let a low growl but didn't say anything after to retort Bourne. Instead, he turned to his console and we all went into the door ready for any Geth that would come at us.

Bourne took a few steps ahead of us and activated the lashes. "Good news is, it's close quarters, and that's where I really can do damage. Bad news is, it means that unless you hang back, I'm not going to be able to go full force. These can kill you just as easily as them."

I stepped behind Bourne and locked my shotgun into safety so I wouldn't accidentally shoot him. "Okay you're up."

We all stepped into the walk way and for the first time since landing, we were confronted by… nothing. There were no Geth, Thorian creepers, or surprise baddies. The rest was calming but Shepard looked a bit annoyed.

"Something wrong Shepard?"

"There's nothing here to shoot." She and Bourne both answered at the same time, her annoyed, Bourne puzzled.

_)Maybe I teleported farther than I thought.(_

_ ^No, we are literally safe.^_

He looked around, eyes blazing. "Keep your eyes peeled. Two Primes don't just disappear...and if they do, it's because there's something more powerful making it happen."

"That, or they can use my… nevermind. I'm not gonna say it because if I do we are all screwed."

Bourne grunted agreement, not letting his guard waver.

"Say what, that they might have your ability to jump through portals?"

As soon as it was said, the two primes shot out of portal on opposite sides of us and we were surrounded.

"Damnit Garrus!" Bourne and I swore at the same time.

He put up the Biotic Sphere as they opened fire. "Well, at least we know where they are now." He said darkly.

I made a quick call and moved to the one that was deeper in the hall and put my hands to his chest. "Data purge!" The Prime was hit with a blast equal to a biotic throw and flew into the hallway, allowing us to focus on the one by the exit.

"Shepard, hit it with a Cryo Blast." Bourne said calmly. "Garrus, follow it up with Overload and detonate it."

Shepard fired her cryoblast and Garrus followed it up with an overload almost completely freezing the prime.

"That should keep it busy for a moment." Bourne said, turning back to the first one as it got back up. "Now, lets see how tough this thing is!" He charged at it before it was fully standing, knocking it back, then followed it up with a Nova to send it flying back. As it got up on its knees, he brought both whips down in an overhead strike that literally sent it through the floor. He had to teleport back to us as the ancient floor collapsed into a cavern below it.

I looked at the hole and scratched my head. "Uh, how are we supposed to get past that?"

"You've got glitches and he can teleport. Worry about the one that's standing." Shepard said as it started to thaw.

I looked back at it and knew exactly how to deal with it. I grabbed the glaive off my back and ran up to it and chopped it's head off with one stroke.

"Yeah, there are no glitches on the other side and Bourne can't teleport people."

"Actually...huh, I've got no idea if I could." He shrugged. "I can charge across with a passenger though. Wouldn't be the first time."

I nodded at his suggesting. "Yeah, guess so."

"Want us to go over there then Shepard?"

She nodded. "We'll wait here in case more show up."

"In that case-" He turned to me, then suddenly lifted me and threw me across with his biotics. He teleported over a moment later. "Sorry, I just couldn't resist. That, and the only way I know to carry you would have been bridal style, and I don't think either of us wanted that."

I stood up and rubbed the back of my head. "Yeah, good call. so, where is that container again?"

He glanced around. "Pleeeeaaaaase tell me it didn't fall down the hole with the Prime."

"No it's in the back of the halls somewhere around here."

He shrugged. "Guess we'll have to look around for it."

At a glance, I spied the container on the other side of the hole. "Well shit, you picked the wrong side."

He swore under his breath. _)Let's see if there's anything else over here.(_

I took a step in the other direction and felt something shoot into my foot. "Ouch, fuck what was that?"

I crouched next to it and dug whatever stabbed me out of the dirt. I pulled it up and handed it to Bourne. "Uh, I think I just found one of your knives. But it looks like it has been here a while."

He frowned and looked down at his belt, counting the knives still there. "I'm not missing any...well thanks to your ex I am, but I still have all 12 that I actually got back." He bounced it in his palm. "And my knives are rust proof, since there's so many wet environments to deal with out here."

"Yeah, but rust can form on fragmented metal. That knife can still be good, try wiping some of the rust and dirt off. There could even be a box of them around here."

He gave me a skeptical look, but wiped it off. His eyes widened slightly as the rust came off, which basically meant his jaw would have dropped if he didn't have the poker face built in. He smiled suddenly as he tucked it onto his belt. _)About time reality started bending to actually help me out.( _He suddenly frowned and looked down at his arms. _)Course, if there are more knives...God damnit, I knew I was jumping the gun with the phoenix lashes! It took me ages to get those fucking things working! And that was with Garrus to help me finish them too!(_

_ ^I got a look at the programming, all we need is another spare suit of armor and I can hook you up.^_

He looked down at my feet, then above my head. _)I don't see anything it could have come out of though.( _Part of the wall behind us suddenly crumbled away due to the giant hole he'd made, revealing a locker hidden behind it. He pulled it over to us before it could fall in as well. _)You know, I really oughta get Cecelia or Tali to show me how to actually hack one of these things open.(_

I tapped it once and the locker popped open, revealing a ton of knives, two more tomahawks, and a meat cleaver. "Why the fuck would people need tomahawks and a meat cleaver here?"

"Dibs on the cleaver." He said, picking it up and weighing it in his hands. _)And this is either me warping luck enough I need to buy several lottery tickets, or else Danny left it here to help us out…yeah, I'm buying a lottery ticket next time we're on the citadel.(_

I grabbed the tomahawks and looked at them. "It I get any more of these, I'm gonna have to see about making them collapsable."

_)A dude from RvB could figure it out, and he wasn't already surrounded by weapons that compact.(_

_ ^Yeah, and if I figure that out, I can make a grenade launcher that is part hammer.^_

_ )I doubt you'd actually be able to lift that sort of thing...me on the other hand-(_

"You find something over there?" Shepard called across.

"Enough knives to satisfy even me." Bourne called back, looking at the cleaver again. _)But where the hell am I supposed to put this thing?( _He shrugged and moved his assault rifle to where a sniper rifle would normally be, and stuck the cleaver in the now vacant spot, blade going in so nothing would get sliced by it on accident.

I took a running start forward and propelled myself across the gap to the other side.

_You know, normally you wouldn't have made that jump._

"That you Drew." From there I grabbed the box and looked over at Bourne. "Want to see what other goodies we get?"

"Unless there's a Scorpion in there, I don't see what else I'd ever need…No, I take that back. A Grawl Spike Launcher or something would be awesome. My current shotgun is outgunned by my freakin pistol."

I pried open the crate and saw a pistol, one suit of armor, and a grenade mod. Grabbing the pistol up, I noticed it was a Stinger V. I quickly held it up and looked at bourne, "Dibs."

"Why would I call dibs on that? It doesn't make things explode when it shoots them."

"I was calling it so that Wrex and Garrus don't get it." I strapped it to my other side across from the one I took from the colonists. "Now, I got that spare suit we needed and a grenade mod."

"I got dibs on both." Shepard said from behind me.

I looked at Shepard. "Okay, Bourne, want to get this over to her?"

"Since I'd rather not have her mad at me than have the knives, sure." _)Plus, I somehow feel like purple armor would end up making purple gauntlets. And I don't pull that look off as well as Hero does.(_

I looked down at the armor again. "Huh, did you have your game modded?"

His head whipped over towards Cecelia, but she didn't seem to have heard me.

_ )Dude! Ix-nay on the ame-gay! It's a miracle we've managed to keep it from her this long, but that doesn't mean we should let our guard down!(_

_ ^Right, did you have a mod?^_

_ )Of course not!… I think. Amnesia kinda is vague on that one. Why do you ask?(_

_ ^Because, Partisan armor is only available through mods.^_

_ )I thought that only was in the PC version.( _He replied, lifting it into the air with his biotics and sending it across. _)Unless I played PC and just don't remember it...yeah, even if I did, I doubt I would have been able to mod anything.(_

_ ^God, why can't you understand computers?^_ I made my way over to the side and jumped back to where Shepard and the others were.

He teleported over a moment later. _)How should I know why I don't? Amnesia, remember? For all I know, I worked at Microsoft or Apple and nothing carried over!( _He glanced back, and the locker with the knives closed itself and flew over to him. _)Or I could have been an hitman who played x-box in his downtime-which'd actually explain a lot. I try not to think about that stuff for a reason.(_

_ ^You could have been a man whore and not know about it.^_

His eyes went red as he glared at me.

. _^Just saying, you try to think you were this amazing person and I just want to point out that you could have been the gamer geek that lived in his mother's basement too.^_

_ )Ty, I'm already trying really hard not to test out the new cleaver on you for the last line. Please stop talk-...man, we really need to figure out what to call this thing.(_

_ ^How about talking over the mind link?^_

He shook his head and teleported. "You guys coming or not?" He asked over the comm. We all got behind him and jumped into the Mako to Wrex's relief. Although, he didn't give up the gun seat and gave Bourne the stink eye when he tried to take it.

"Alright, everyone turn around. I need to change armors."

"Should I put Ty in Stasis so his eyes don't wander?" Bourne asked, turning in his seat. "Also, am I the only one here who actually wears something under the armor? I mean seriously, this stuff chaffed the hell out of me the one time I didn't."

I just turned around in my chair and leaned on my knees. "Dude, this planet is hot and I can't imagine wearing something under the armor. Granted I am technically naked in the stuff but it's still hot."

"One, way too much information. Two, I probably just deal with heat better than you can." He smiled slightly, head still pointing at the back of the tank. "Three, how long do you think Shepard's had that tattoo?"

The urge to look back became great and it felt like I was going to look when she finally spoke. "Okay, I'm done. And Bourne, you are cleaning the bathrooms when we get back."

"In my place, you'd have been trying the same trick." He said with a shrug.

"Look at my commanding officer's back to see if she has a tramp stamp? No, I honestly wouldn't."

"Lady, if I was going to commit suicide, I can think of better ways to do it than actually turning aroun- wait are you saying you do have one?"

There was a loud bang near the cockpit and then she said. "Make that for two weeks."

"That didn't sound like a denial."

"Bourne, Four weeks."

He chuckled. _)Well, at least now you won't be surprised by it if it goes that far.(_

_ ^I don't know if I should commend you for your stupidity or pray for you and your time in the bathroom after Wrex takes a shower… and I heard Shepard order him to take one at least once a week.^_

_ )Phss, like I'm actually cleaning the showers.(_

_ ^Dude, you are a paid merc and the contract states that you will do as ordered while within contracted limits.^_

_ )What contract?...damnit, please don't say you or Hero signed for me.(_

_ ^I was forced to sign for you since I was you. Plus, Hero told me it was alright.^_

Again, his eyes went Red, and he didn't bother sending words across the link. Just a very detailed image of himself strangling both of us.

_^I'll remember to send that to Hero when we get to the Normandy.^_

_ )Oh, I'll be having a chat with her too...and possibly seeing if I can get Tali to upload a virus or something to delete it.(_

_ ^The alliance owes you 1 mil. if it stays.^_

_ )Isn't the whole point of doing this so we can GTFO and get back to where we came from? I kinda doubt it'd transfer cleaning up after Wrex would cost at least a billion for me to even consider it.(_

_ ^Then, I guess you are going to have to play Tali and have her delete it for her crush.^_

_ )You know, a real friend would do it instead so I wouldn't have to deal with the woman I stabbed__that has a crush on me.(_

_ ^Yeah, well, I kind of need direct contact and I don't know if it was an Email or a data pad. if you can get me the true solid copy I could help you but my power is limited right now.^_

_ )Well, if you signed it...god damn dude if we hadn't decided to bury the hatchet, I would open the back door and throw you out of it while we were moving. And then probably charge at you, Nova, double lash smash, then teleport back into the Mako. And then fire a rocket at you if I could get Wrex out of the seat.(_

_ ^Wow, you have a temper that seems to be getting worse as time goes on. You sure Iron isn't bleeding over into your psyche?^_

_ )If my eyes start going red, I'll worry about it.(_

_ ^They just were...^_

_ )...again, that's something it'd have been nice to know a little earlier!( _He looked down at his arms. _)I knew that I got his and Hero's biotics added to mine, but I didn't think my eyes would be going wonky too...have my eyes gone purple at all?(_

_ ^Not that I have noticed. That has to be the weirdest feeling knowing someone can take you over at any time.^_

_ )...did you forget about what happened with you and Saren? And how could Bronze take me over now that he has an actual body?(_

_ ^I didn't forget that, I just don't remember how it felt. It was a seemless transition that happened when I got really angry. All fuckface would have to do is focus hard enough. As Jackie Chan would say: Your focus needs more focus.^_

_ )It's Iron we're talking about. He can't focus on anything for more than two seconds unless he's actively killing something. And I've fought off his influence before. Come to think of it, he was especially strong here on Feros because of the Thorian spores. Probably the same thing happening.(_

_ ^I wonder if he is doing all that from Eden Prime or Omega or wherever the hell I sent him.^_

_ )It might also just be a side effect of the implants. Since Shepard and Shepard aren't around to control them, they'd have to be hooked up to my own brain somehow.(_

_ ^I wonder if that means Hero could hear us then. Because if she is hooked up again then it might also work as a range extender.^_

There was a huge explosion that made us all heave starboard and Shepard screamed. "Damnit, wait till I stop to fire Wrex! We can't wait for the gun to cool to fire every time I stop."

"There's a reason I tried to take over when we got back in here." Bourne said, rubbing the back of his head where it'd hit the side of the tank.

_^Lets try, hey Hero, you there? Maybe Iron, you there fuckface? If you are then I'll stop calling you fuckface if you answer.^_

There was a pregnant pause.

_)Well, I just sent Hero a message asking if she could hear us from here, and her answer is, and I quote:Ty, stop fucking around with Bourne's omni-tool. If you want to talk to me, just use your own.(_

_ ^God, does she get angry on hydrous?^_

_ )On what?(_

_ ^Painkillers.^_

_ )How should I know? For 90% of the time I've known her, she hasn't had a real body.(_

_ ^Ask her if she is on painkillers.^_

_ )She had her leg snapped pretty much completely the wrong way; I think it's safe to assume that she is. And like she said, you've got an omni-tool too.(_

_ ^Yes, but you need to let her know that it is you asking these questions.^_

_ )I asked the first one, but the second one is all you. And how am I supposed to prove it's me anyway?(_

_ ^Fine.^_ I pulled up my omni-tool and typed: **That was actually Bourne. Are you on hydrous or any form of painkillers currently?**

She was only a few moments in replying. **I'm trying to get some goddamn peace and quiet! If you idiots need something, find someone else to bother!**

Bourne leaned over to read the message as well. _)Either she's been replaced with Snake Shepard, or she's really, really pissed...maybe it's that time of the month. It'd certainly explain Cecelia's behavior.(_

A new message suddenly popped up. **And before one of you geniuses asks, no, it isn't that time of the month. **

_)Man, does she know me, or does she know me?(_

_ ^Or me… God, she is like that girl that you are friends with but forget why sometimes.^_

_ )I'm pretty sure you just described junior year of high school.(_

_ ^How would you know, you can't remember the day before you came in here. Let alone-^_

_)It was a joke. Sheesh.( _

_ ^Plus, high school was nothing like that for me. I had my friends and I knew why I had those friends. Danny because we have always been friends. Cody because he is chill. Mark because he is just fun to hang out with… I wonder why he isn't in the game. I would have thought that he would have been invited to the party.^_

He didn't reply to that, instead looking something up on his omni-tool.

_^What's up?^_

_ )Do you remember the fake files you whipped up to cover her back story? Like an ID for her or anything?(_

It took me a moment but I remembered everything that I wrote._ ^Yeah, why is something up?^_

_ )Because this subscription service needs one from here. And since I don't know her date of birth or anything like that- well, not the fake stuff anyway.(_

_^I said she was twenty-five.^_

_)So since the current year is 2183, she'd have been born in 2158...Shepard was actually born in 2154, just for future reference. Okay, so now I just need the ID file for her omni-tool so this site knows where to send the stuff.(_

_ ^You're not subscribing her to Fornax, are you?^_

_ )Technically, no. I'm just signing her up for the 30 day free trial.(_

_ ^I could hook you up with a couple million dollars so you can make it a 10 year membership.^_

_ )If I was going to get a million dollars, I can think of better things to spend it on than a joke that she'll delete after she realizes what it is.(_

_ ^Not if you change her passwords.^_

_ )That's...I'll think about that one. Maybe she had a good reason for telling you to sign that for me. If not, I'm want to change it to a super long series of random stuff that only I could remember.(_

_ ^Yep, so about Ashley…^_

He grimaced slightly. _)What?(_

_ ^In my experience, you need to go talk to her before she convinces herself that you hate her. At least, show that you weren't leading her on with that dance.^_

He didn't sigh aloud, but he did over the channel. _)At this point, I'm not sure that wouldn't just be for the best. It'd hurt a bit, but she's waiting for me back in Raptor's universe, so I could live with it.( _His tone made him less than convincing.

I rolled my eyes and sat back. _^The Ashley from your universe bled into this one. How else do you explain how she feels about you with the scars and barely talking to you?^_

_ )Maybe she just likes bad boys.( _He deadpanned.

_^Totally, and Wrex is her next choice after you.^_

_ )I'm sorry, was that suppose to be even the slightest bit funny? I didn't say I liked the idea. Just that I could live with it if it came down to it. I mean, seriously...I have a super long rant about it in my head I've been working on, do I need to let loose with it?(_

I stayed silent and looked out the porthole near his head.

_)Imagine that your girlfriend, one you could easily imagine spending your life with, had a clone. An identical copy, for all intents and purposes. Neither would ever know of the existence of the other unless you told them, and they'd think you were crazy if you did. Now, imagine further that while you had a history with one of them, the other saw you as a complete stranger, and for all intents and purposes was. You knew everything about the copy, but she knew next to nothing about you….should I continue, or is the gist already clear?(_

_ ^I would still go for the clone knowing that the other would hate me in a few months.^_

He shook his head. _)She would hate _Shepard _for joining up with Cerberus, and for 'faking' being dead for 2 years. And as has been made very clear, I'm _not _Shepard. In any universe. I could just do the Spectre thing until she wakes up and meet up with her then. Maybe make sure she doesn't mention Cerberus, just that we're working with a group of private merc or something like that.(_

_ ^You know that won't work.^_

_ )Why wouldn't it? I know exactly when and where Shepard will wake up- hell, Jacob tells you exactly long she'd dead to the day.( _He shook his head again. _)And even if it does come down to harsh words- When Shepard romanced her, he got a message from her, not quite apologizing, but pretty close. And it's possible to rekindle things later. I mean, it's not like I'm liable to find someone else in the meantime.(_

_ ^Okay, do what you want then. In the end it doesn't really matter, right? It all is going to end with three fucking choices.^_

_ )Maybe. Maybe I can change a few things and avoid that. Say I happen to look at the blueprints and 'notice' that it'd be the perfect size to link up to the citadel. Before Thessia. Slim chance, but so was becoming a Spectre, having two other people inside my head, and not only having pieces of a spaceship dropped on me, but surviving the experience.(_

_ ^If you think you can then do it. You have the benefit of not knowing the true path before you. Mine ends on a hill, surrounded by reapers.^_

_ )Or so the AI told you. She might even believe it. Doesn't' mean it's true.(_

_ ^Everything else it told me has happened and this is one of those things that it will fight me tooth and nail to make sure happens.^_

_ )You're not exactly unstubborn yourself. I didn't say it wouldn't be difficult to change the future, but few things worth doing are easy.( _He put his hands together and leaned towards me. _)Which brings up a question- how exactly do we win and get back?(_

_ ^We play the game.^_

_ )But think about it for a moment- Biotic Sphere, Reave, that was never in the first game. And have any of the AI come right out and said if we beat _Saren _that we've won? Actions carry across the entire series. I mean, what, if we finish this, Cecelia just goes on without us, despite us changing things up? Doesn't that seem a little too easy to you?(_

_ ^This hasn't been easy but I can believe one thing can be.^_

_ )I'm hoping I'm just jumping at shadows, but if I'm not...it'd just be a good thing to keep in mind.( _I could tell he'd been about to say something else before he changed his answer.

Cecelia began yelling at us, saying something about offloading now that we were parked. _^Bourne, there is one person you can trust in this besides me. The AI.^_

_ )I trust you, and I trust Hero, and I trust myself. The AI already brought Iron back from the dead and wants to make this as hard as possible.( _

He jumped down from the back of the tank, pulling his cleaver off his back as a creeper ran at him. He sliced it clean in half almost casually and then stored the weapon again. _)Maybe we can wait to discuss it until after we're done here.(_

"Bourne, I thought the plan you and Flynn somehow talked me into was to not kill the colonists." Shepard said as she walked past me and jumped out of the tank as well.

He prodded one half with his boot as the rest of us gathered around. "Take a look at this thing and tell me if you really think it was ever a colonist."

"Looks like a gross form of animal… Can we keep it?"

"You want to keep a bisected- dude, I don't care how crazy the lot of us are, that's way too far."

Cecelia glared at us both in turn. "The plan for these things is simple. Shoot on sight. As for the colonists…don't kill them unless you absolutely have to." She looked pointedly at me and Bourne again. "But if it's a choice between one of them and one of us, and you hesitate, I will throw you off my ship the next port we dock at."

Bourne just flicked his wrists and activated the lashes. "There's probably going to be a lot more of these…creepers, on the other side of the door. I'll go in first, clear us a path. Whatever these things are made off, it's more like tissue paper than flesh."

"I'll get in a glitch and see what we are facing." I stepped to the nearest wall and opened the glitch that rested on it. "Well, let's hope I survive long enough to get a look at Shepard's tattoo."

**(Okay, which one of you came up with that horrible pun of a title?)**

**T117: Uh...I don't know. That's the trouble with releasing these things 3-4 months after we write them. I wanna say it was Spike, but I'm not completely sure.**

**S7: It was. You have only titled eight chapters.**

**^Well, you gotta admit he is making an attempt with SaWoF.^**

**)Yeah, he's had a couple good ones there.(**

**T117: Yeah, my ideas are more...in the story though, as opposed to that...are you sure it was only eight? Seems like at least a couple more.**

**S7: Okay, maybe a few more, like twelve.**

**T117: That seems about right...not that I'm proud to admit it.**

**(It's not really that you can't come up with them, it's that you're lazy enough you usually just wait till he suggests on and then go with that one.)**

**T117:...That's...fairly accurate actually.**

**^Well, at least you are honest about it.^**

**~Indeed.~**

**S7: Okay, Layla, you are not allowed to talk. Not only did you steal my computer but you also took over an entire chapter and did a crap author's notes.**

**(Yeah, and she also told T117 and Bourne about some new Iphone game they both kept playing nonstop so they missed the meeting...or she paid me to knock them out, I don't remember which.)**

**S7:... What game was it?**

**)It was the knocked out scenario. I don't know what he put in that drink, but I still feel like I need to brush my teeth.(**

**T117: Mouthwash helps. A bit.**

**S7: I just… the way you… It makes it sounds like you did something… dirty and… kinda… sorta… homosexual.**

**(Hehe, that's why I said it that way.)**

**)Get your minds out of the gutter. That goes for you too Trebor.(**

**T117: What? I meant like a really gross tasting sleeping pill or something.**

**(Suuuuuuuuuure you did.)**

**T117: How would you possibly know what I was thinking?**

**(...Seriously?)**

**)Ugh, if I'm having to deal with him again, he had better get killed by the end of this.( **

***What he said.***

**^Okay, we gotta cut this off early. Bigger things are a calling.^**

**(Oh yeah, like what?)**

**S7: Legends of Silvania.**

**(Gesundheit...wait, why did you type your sneeze instead of just saying it?)**

**T117: Okay, this is actually important, so CTHI? Would you mind?**

Not at all.

**(You suc **Crazey metal has been logged off by host

**S7: Well lets go. I still gotta figure out whether to start with Riker or Jason this chapter.**

**)No relation.(**

**^Some relation… kinda… Trebor designed him. You are like cousins.^**

**)What, did he give him throwing knives too?(**

**T117:...Maybe.**

**)...*Facepalm*( **Krog nKi11er24 has logged himself out.

**^Sounds like he isn't happy you gave another character his special thing.^**

**T117: Whiner...wait...if he's a SI of me, did I just burn myself with that?**

***Maybe he's just annoyed you actually gave someone a realistic name for once.***

**T117: For the record, Spike picked all three names.**

***Okay, that makes way more sense then.***

**T117:...Yeah, I was kinda backed into a corner either way there.**

**S7: Congrats, wait, does it count as first publishing rights if I upload the first draft to fictionpress? Even if I can delete it? Because I might just upload it to there and get a load of what people have to say. So long as it doesn't could as first publishing rights.**

**T117: Uh...I have no idea how that works. Might want to look into that more before you do anything with it.**

**S7: Okay, well, I guess that is it. 1473I2.**

**T117: Sayonara.**


End file.
